Caught Brother Molesting My 5-Year-Old (How Do We Heal?)

[@om617yota8]

I hope any family member who gave negative feedback about going to the police is 100% completely cut out of these people's lives, forever.

[@natalata1435]

💯💯💯💯💯

[@ryanjacob8568]

I was thinking how enraged I would be if my family had asked me not to call the cops. If this guy isn't stopped now he'll do it again.

[@CarmenBuenrostro]

I can’t believe this. Why is it made “not a big deal”?

[@Hellokitty7163]

The sad thing is that family members still think in 2022 that this should be hush hush

[@om617yota8]

@@Hellokitty7163 Hush hush is why these monsters get away with it. I agree, in this day and age everyone should know better.

[@meljordan220]

I was molested as a child by my sister's husband. Nobody in the family believed me. I was 10. When I got married and had my daughter I wouldn't let her near him. This caused a major family divide. At least my daughter never had this happen to her.

[@jilliana4701]

I'm so sorry you didn't have your family to support you through what you went through. Also, thank you for protecting your daughter. Your daughter is blessed to have a mom willing to protect her no matter the cost.

[@TheLaly37]

Sorry this happens to you. How is the still breathing perfectly fine air!

[@meljordan220]

@@jilliana4701 Thank you so much. Eventually I found healing and was able to forgive him. He eventually asked my forgiveness. A year later he died.

[@daviddegea3373]

Thank you for surviving and thank you for sharing your story and making sure that grief turned to strength, so that your daughter never goes through this. You inspire people let me tell you that :) Thank you again.

[@katarinaolstad9709]

Soooo sorry no one believed you, thats heartbreaking. I believe you💗

[@myrawest]

As someone who was molested/abused at about this age and both parents did NOTHING, it is strangely validating and therapeutic to see how seriously this family took it and to hear what SHOULD have happened.

[@mineandmine4528]

I am so sorry for what happened to you. Hope you doing ok.

[@IloveJesus777j77]

​@@mineandmine4528Jesus is coming back. Believe He died for your sins and rose again then repent to be saved.

[@amyturner6275]

Of course!. You are worth fighting for. Your parents job was to protect you and defend you .

[@daryabulbenkova]

This is exactly what I’m feeling ❤

[@StephanieTips]

I hope you don't talk to your parents anymore. They do not deserve you, they should be ashamed of themselves

[@mathmaniac4777]

Don't overlook the son who potentially witnessed this as well. He is going to need therapy too. This is how these behaviors are passed along. Also-check to make sure he wasn't also molested. Feel crushed for the daughter. A lifetime of work and healing because of someone else's sick, nasty perversion.

[@gummy5862]

Throughout the discourse, I actually forgot he existed. Can't believe they completely ignored him throughout the discussion when he's almost as scarred or potentially as scarred as his sister.

[@trixonic6934]

True that. I know someone who went through something similar and he ended up repeating what happened to him from a former male babysitter who was trusted in the neighborhood

[@TheInsaiyan]

Such behaviors are not "passed along" most abusive victims don't become abusers. That's just an excuse serial killers and psychopaths came up with to gather sympathy and now we're all collectively believing them lmfao. People are born this way not made this way, most of the time. People just love to believe that environment molds people, that's true, but such vile behaviors come from deep routed mental issues one is BORN with.

[@KennTollens]

Hopefully the therapy is good and it they are not victims their life and need a lifetime of work.

[@GameChanger597]

This was my first thought. What about the little boy? What did he see that he needs therapy for now? Was waiting on him to mention the child but I think everyone assumed he didn't see anything bc he was watching the movie. No doubt he saw everything. So horrific

[@lindseyroy1629]

I cannot believe how many people are in the comments saying they were abused and their parents did nothing. I’m a mom now, and I’m weeping for them. What the hell is wrong with their parents? How could they not protect their children?

[@stacyjaye6350]

Don't take this the wrong way, but you probably shouldn't be using the phrase "I cannot believe" around people that haven't been believed. I know it's a figure of speech, but that's all we have is our words.

[@stacyjaye6350]

Try "it's shocking to me" "it's deplorable" etc

[@sarahyegge8293]

Because "blood (dad's brother) is thicker than water (5yr old me)" per mom, who also forgave my abuser and refused to make a police report after abuser/uncle/teacher agreed to pray with their pastor. With a wave of the wand no police report was needed. He dropped dead at 45, massive heart attacker with house keys in his hand. I think God was protecting his new 6yr old step+granddaughter...

[@lynaeeakettgreene7208]

It disturbs me too, so much. My parents backed me 💯. As much as I have struggled to live my life after childhood sexual abuse, I cannot even imagine what would have happened to me if I hadn't had my parents. I'd probably be dead, to be honest.

[@Silvervelocity1988]

For real… I know kids make stuff up sometimes but I feel like kids wouldn’t usually make something like that up they shouldn’t even know what those things are. I’m about to have a baby boy and if everything in this world that scares me the most it’s knowing if anything like this happens to my little boy if there is a god may he help the perpetrator because I dont think I could control myself from ending someone for this crime

[@itslochjess2111]

As a Christian woman, whenever I hear "we spoke to the church", my heart breaks because I feel like that usually means "we're going to pray and nothing else".

[@GangsterNerd1]

So true.

[@jojotheoj]

As a human person of irrelevant religious affiliation, I agree.

[@Indy__isnt_it]

The church is where I learned about infidelity. The protestant minister started an affair with the mother of four children, married, left the entire family in pure embarrassment one son was my age, so we saw and felt in pain each week when church convened. We were around 8 to 10 years old at most. What an education that we all had to learn. My brother abused me at 15 -17 yo. He cut me off when I asked for an apology. He's not a narcissist like I ended up marrying. My sister cut me off when I tried to talk to her about it. Her response was, I wish you never told me. She's a full blown narcissist. I've STUDIED it extensively.

[@lifebeginswithaseed]

Well, he got arrested. That's more than most(which is disgusting). They talked to a couple of counselors, he said.

[@sheridanvance7426]

❤

[@SUZANNECARPENTER-ou3je]

I was molested when I was 11. I fought the entire time. When I told, my mother did nothing. She told me they were our neighbors, snd we had to live there. Some weird things happened in my mind. I ended up becoming too sexual a few years later. I never learned how to have a relationship. I never married. What he did to me destroyed something in me. My family not reacting only destroyed me more.

[@SweetlyHome]

I'm so deeply sorry this happened to you. My heart just sank reading your words. Sending so much love to you and saying a prayer over your precious life.

[@girloffaith16]

This internet stranger hopes you are doing things for YOU. Because you are worth it

[@Paigedh1776]

❤❤❤

[@misstybyers]

I’m sorry you went through that. Reading your words made me realize that my family shouldn’t have asked if I wanted to press charges. I was a child who had been groomed and feared that it would be would be worse if I turned my father in. My family was upset but did nothing about it. This taught me that it was normal to still have contact with my abuser and it was okay for my brothers to still live with him, (it was not). Essentially the outcome was the same. I became promiscuous at a young age, I have an inability to be intimate with partners on a spiritual level, and never married. I have recently started seeing a therapist who is helping me work through this. I hope we can both find a way to a better life and healing. Sending positive vibes and warm hugs 🫂 sorry if any of this comes off wrong. I will delete it, if requested.

[@dallinclark607]

I sorry, that's horrible of your mom to put her head in the sand like that. I hope you're healing well

[@mizztia5303]

It's a sad state of affairs when we have to congratulate parents for calling the police when their child is molested.

[@dmalka336]

Disturbing.

[@testaccount01336]

I caught that too as well as he is proud that they believed their child.

[@vonnie0_0]

You’d be disgusted to know how common it is for family members to defend the offender, instead of the victim, to defend the utmost evil...I personally know some who has gone through this, a lot of people won’t believe a little kid. It’s heartbreaking and unbelievable what these little kids go through.

[@kaybrown7733]

​@vonnie0_0 I'm so thankful that someone else understands that! Thank you!

[@astrozoo]

Human nature is sad. Adults molests kids. This is humanity for you.

[@EDUAROSOLAS]

Let's not forget that people who protect child sexual abusers are also child sexual abusers.

[@Lil-Whiskies]

You're absolutely right, they are protecting the abuser, not the victim. Thank you for framing it that way.

[@Sarah-xj9il]

exactly!!!

[@7somekindofsomething]

Fact!

[@allaboutrap1]

Yup

[@kat7047]

I agree with this sentiment but this is factually incorrect. They are terrible humans though.

[@JedionEarth108]

Anyone who said the person shouldn’t have been arrested is just as perverted and should be kept away. They don’t love her or your family. It’s perverted to protect a pedophile.

[@calebfielding6352]

Most people I know who say they shouldnt be arrested are the type of people to mean they should be exicuted without help of the police or courts.

[@zulikkowalski3547]

Maybe they molested the perp at some point

[@dewilew2137]

@@calebfielding6352 and a lot of men who say such things are only trying to hide their own secrets. They’re just words after all.

[@oulibemusic1257]

it takes a pedophile to protect one

[@bradcruise6291]

There is a group in the democratic party that wants to rename pedophiles MATS. Minor attracted persons. They also say it's just their way of life that must be respected just like being gay. Not my words, theirs.

[@meredithc4735]

My sister was molested by my uncle. My parents did nothing from what i could remember and they kept him in our life. I wish my parents would have had a backbone to actually act to protect their kids.

[@Motogurl.v]

Yep. Happened to me after my mami died. Got sent to foster care by her own son.

[@elainaweeks7937]

Amen

[@biellaspointofview2054]

Uncle on whose side? I’m surprised one of your parents wasn’t angry but that leads me to wonder if any of your parents did something similar to a minor in their past.

[@MatthewsSloan]

People are just weak. It happens all the time. @@biellaspointofview2054

[@mineandmine4528]

@meredithc4735, Same thing happened to me. My mother did nothing and protected her brother. I was told to “get over it”. I refuse to have children because of what happened.

[@reynoldskh80]

I was exiled by my family because my brother molested my daughter and I stood up for my child. It is what it is my children will always be my priority .

[@alisonsattler6396]

Great for you!!!

[@berrysweetx3]

@@alisonsattler6396sorry to say… screw ur family. They’re no family. Children come first. glad you stood up for your daughter. Life will send you family in other ways, it doesn’t have to be blood. 🙏🏽

[@madhuparnaghosh6254]

So very proud of you. You truly deserve to be a mother. Idk how parents just neglect their kids, and don't stand by them. It's diabolical. Some humans don't deserve to be parents. Wishing you the best.

[@ark194]

It's Christmas, and so many ppl are alone because of this.

[@Sashagable]

Bless you, your children will always look up to you as their earthly angel and that’s what I think of my mom. My earthly angel. 🥹🥰💕

[@nickywaggs8672]

This happened to my daughter by her mothers boyfriend. We showed up for court and her mother was there side by side with the guy. I’m still in shock. But we now have custody and our daughter is excelling.

[@V.E.R.O.]

Wow, that's disgusting! I'm so sorry for what happened to your daughter and for the added pain of her mother supporting the abuser.

[@sarahburggraf907]

Im 43. My mother's bf molested me as a child. But my dad was busy doing other things so the creep was free to do as he pleased. When i finally got the courage to tell she told me i was lying and sent me to live with my grandma then proceeded to marry the molester. Thank you for being a loving father to your baby. As an adult SURVIVOR of childhood sexual abuse thank you❤

[@nickywaggs8672]

@@sarahburggraf907hope you’ve found peace. I’m sorry that it happened to you. It literally makes my stomach turn.

[@MN-br5nb]

@@sarahburggraf907I don’t know if it means anything but I would like to acknowledge you. You exist, you matter, you have value and I hope you are thriving my friend. Keep looking forward!

[@Hatbox948]

My ex husband molested our daughter. It's a devastating experience I don't wish on anyone.

[@Girlgonewise]

This is one of the reasons why I don’t trust anyone to the point where I let them have access to my children. Some people are SICK.

[@brandonmetcalf3526]

Agreed! 100% no sleep overs!

[@amberl7773]

It’s just scary that people are bold enough to do it with other kids in the room while the mother was in the same location. Sick you literally can’t trust anyone.

[@zeal4god402]

Only God knows the heart, we merely see the outward appearance

[@amde8554]

@@zeal4god402 isn’t that the truth

[@oliviaacosta6239]

I agree. Don’t trust anybody especially your own family. It happened to me and I regretted ever since. It caused my daughter severe trauma and now she’s bipolar

[@whatintheheck4692]

I was abused from ages 7-11 by a family member. I never told anyone and felt so much guilt until I was 16 and confessed to a religious leader. He let me know that it wasn’t my fault,it lifted some weight off my shoulders, but that was about it. When my mom found out, all she said was that she was abused too and I’ll be okay. I’m 100% sure my abuse caused my unexplained infertility and currently affects my intimacy with my husband. Child abuse has lifelong ramifications.

[@AREEYAWNA]

I’m so sorry :(

[@marteumar8429]

It’s a good thing you can’t have children. I wouldn’t want you to have a daughter. Your case sounds like generational trauma

[@alexperkins8433]

im so sorry that was your mothers response - horrifying. carry on bravely and stay in yr truth.

[@leahflower9924]

I say this from first hand experience so I'm sorry but I gotta say sometimes having a mom who was abused herself is a nightmare because they really will just excuse everything away or try to normalize abuse somehow they'll even subconsciously put their kids at risk for abuse

[@aprilchow-chee5281]

So true I'm over protective of my daughter because of it

[@bethsnider5796]

I found out this happened to my son when he was around 6. He did not tell me until he was 18. As soon as he told me we went to the police. The family member was eventually arrested and two other children also came forward to testify against him. He is facing 17 counts each with a possibility of 25 - Life in prison. I found this out May 31, 2021 and my life has never been the same. I wish I could have protected my child. I am beyond heartbroken. It’s been the hardest thing I’ve ever experienced.

[@kellharris2491]

I bet it ment a lot to your son that you stood by his side when he told you.

[@winkA1]

Good on you for going to the police as soon as you knew. My little brother told my parents when he was 2 or 3 that a family member had touched him… and no one went to the police. You likely have protected future children that he would have molested. The fact you stood by your son when he felt strong enough to tell you will be remembered by him forever. I cannot understand parents who fob off or disbelieve children who tell them about abuse. What possible reason would a child have to make themselves uncomfortable and embarrassed without reason. Even if it’s a misunderstanding it should still be investigated by the authorities.

[@dreamweaver444]

If he felt safe enough to confide in you, you probably did right by your children 🩷 he probably was able to let go of the (perceived) shame as an adult and knew that his mama would still protect him. don’t doubt yourself. hindsight is 20/20. I hope nothing but the best for your son.

[@StrangeSpark]

He came to you with a problem and you helped, so that's something good. I'm sorry someone you knew was an idiot. Unfortunately the monsters aren't always shaped like a beast. They're shaped like Gaston. They're charming, quick witted, and beautiful and that makes them worse. Because they're supposed to be the "good ones."

[@rosielele]

You did right by your son. The moment you knew you did something. This is important. You believed him.

[@P1nkBarbie1]

My grandfather use to touch me and my mother and my grandmother would tell me to stop complaining because it is love and it is him showing me love. This is the discussion I needed as a child and it is healing my inner child.

[@brittanyswanson9820]

Dear god, I'm so incredibly sorry that you didn't have the support and protection you needed as a child. Based on what your mother and grandmother said, I wouldn't be surprised if one or both of them were also abused similarly. Regardless of what they went through personally, I'm so sorry they didn't protect you from that experience and protected him instead. That's not love, it's selfish, disgusting, and evil and you didn't deserve any of what happened to you. I'm glad this video is helping heal the pain you've experienced, but regardless of how long ago this was, I'd highly recommend seeking additional therapy to work through that trauma. Praying for the best for you on your journey. 🙏

[@MsSwap2009]

Hi @P1nkBarbie1 I am sorry for your experience, more because your mother was part of it. I hope that you now have some persons in your life the keep you safe. I hope that you learn what the love is , and that you deserve respect. Dont ever try to please people and forget on your respect and forget to put healty boundaries. Recently I find this podcast, and It help me a lot. dr John Delony is sharp and his recommendations could be applied for many people.

[@s.mariehardesty6398]

Oh honey. I am so sorry that you were not protected and basically thrown to the wolf. I hope you have had the opportunity to start your healing. This is an unfortunate, unfair and terrible event to have happen to you. You are in my prayers. You were let down by your family.

[@fire12731]

Your mom & grandmom are abusers too then. I’m sorry for your pain & devastation. That’s sickening all around

[@Rachel-kg2cw]

Check out wholistic psychologist. She just had a stuntwoman on her show with a similar story. I pray you find healing.

[@kristic4472]

I'd just like to say Thank You for having him arrested! There are too many people out there who will just sweep it under the rug and put it in the closet, pretending it never happened, and either just avoid the perp and keeping their child "safe" while letting him have free access to all the other children in the family/neighborhood, or just deny deny deny. It's a hard thing to deal with, but Thank You for handling it as right as you can.

[@lynnebucher6537]

100% 💯 percent agree with you!

[@randyadams1312]

That was my fear going in. Checked the comments hoping caller did the right thing.

[@ngap67]

Agree with u 200%

[@dana4dayne]

the general population in prison will take care of the problem once they find out he is a chomo.

[@Weakeyedominant]

The brother would be buried in the desert.

[@anjaxtv]

"This is not a moment for pastor's" !! THANK YOU!!

[@stardustgirl2904]

A priest can sometimes be an important bridge to tell others about your pain and suffering!

[@theyoutubeanalyst3731]

​@@stardustgirl2904yeah, but not right at this second

[@jojotheoj]

@@stardustgirl2904A priest is usually invested in his own reputation, which is why they love shutting down complaints behind closed doors.

[@nicholassimon1419]

@@stardustgirl2904when they aren’t the ones causing it

[@stardustgirl2904]

@@nicholassimon1419 I don't belong to a Catholic church.

[@Ash1eonYT]

I was molested by an adult cousin when I was 6 and multiple times thereafter when he visited us until I was 10 and I finally spoke up. I was told I was a liar, my aunt didn't believe me and my mom never advocated for me. My mom was never angry for me and honestly I don't even think she believed me either. Fast forward to my adulthood, I was never counseled on it and now I have a severe aversion to male affection even though I am heterosexual. I have a LOT of baggage from those assaults. My family invited said Cousin to live with them and I have been forced to face him at every family BBQ ever since. They planned a family vacation with me and my 1 year old daughter and I explicitly told them I won't go if he goes because I REFUSE to let him near my baby girl. They tried to get one over on me trying to get around my boundaries and invited him without my knowing and it caused a huge family fight. I was told things like "I need to get over what happened 25 years ago" and have since blocked every family member that hasn't had my back this entire time. Please folks, don't underestimate the long term emotional/mental damage this does to a child and PLEASE take John's advice on seeking behavioral therapy when something like this happens. I was never taught positive touch and now all touch makes me nauseous. It has caused a ton of strife in my relationship and it makes my life hell not being able to enjoy positive human touch. Protect and advocate for your babies!!

[@dreamweaver444]

I’m proud of you. You’re doing right by yourself and your daughter - and you deserve to hear it.

[@susanryan3479]

It is not to late for you to seek Behavioral Therapy. GOD bless you and your daughter. You are a good mom❤

[@christinanavarre8389]

I am sorry you endured that, I'm 66+ now, been married 4 times divorced 3 widowed once. My mother never wanted me...tried everything a woman in 1957 could do to cause a miscarriage. Never had a physical relationship that I felt right about. I never said anything, I was 14 myself....moms baby sisters husband....and another time by a run by boy in a military housing hallway when I was 12. My brother...not the best guy either, but that didn't raise its head till I was older. Long term effects absolutely. I am now the last alive of my family. And truly can say I have never known what love is. If it wasn't for a few very special cats in my life I would have no idea of love or loyalty. 🙏

[@Ash1eonYT]

@@christinanavarre8389 I'm so so sorry that all happened to you. You deserve to feel loved and know what love is, I could not imagine ever treating my babies like that, it makes me sick thinking about how your mother treated you. My cats have brought a lot of joy to my life as well. I have one heart cat (a cat I'm very closely bonded to) named Bink who sleeps next to my chest every night and she has been with me through a horrible 10 year long marriage, a nasty divorce, multiple moves, pregnancy, raising my daughter, now my second pregnancy and the list goes on. She has been my most loyal, unconditional friend for 14 years.

[@NickanM]

Forced? How? 😢

[@invisiblespirit5476]

I’m pretty confident that if this was us, my husband wouldn’t call the police. That brother would just disappear.

[@MatthewsSloan]

I'm not sure if I could stop myself from taking care of it, myself.

[@eancola6111]

“Yeah the last thing he told me was that he wanted to retire to Mexico and live without technology”

[@TheAvprobeauty]

same. it would be my dh trying to stop me.

[@tylerohlmann8904]

100% dude would be deleted from the census immediately

[@JennyLouLou]

​@@tylerohlmann8904ditto

[@chocolatedaisy]

I'm so grateful for my mom, she would tell me ever since I was very young where people should not be touching me, even her once I was old enough to bathe myself. And she always told me to never be afraid to tell her if somebody does touch me, even if they threatened to hurt my family. She made me feel secure that I could go to her for anything and she'd take care of it and protect me.

[@tally_ish]

Your mother sounds like a wonderful woman :)

[@clawmachinez26]

Woah, I had the exact same experience with my mom. Gave me goosebumps reading this comment and remembering her conversations with me about this stuff. I’m so proud of our moms for being such wonderful parents, stranger.

[@jessicaamy6711]

My mum was the same, she said even if her dad or my dad ever touched me to always tell her and she will believe me always. Parents need to have these conversations unfortunately

[@susangrande8142]

I’m glad you have her! I wish my mother had said those things to me. She didn’t. So I didn’t know it wasn’t okay for someone to touch me, and someone did (when I was 6). I didn’t tell anyone until I was an adult.

[@fortinm.6975]

​@@jessicaamy6711 I tell the same thing to my daughter. Communication is important. She knows I'm here and I trust her

[@MariaRodriguez-kc8ui]

The fact that other family members are not supporting the daughter and family is despicable!

[@Mason-ci8gj]

Unfortunately this sex abuser can NEVER be trusted around children unsupervised ever again. Never!! Even after prison and therapy.

[@Devinfrbs]

Ramsey made a good choice hiring John.

[@michele5695]

He's awesome

[@MoveForward96]

I don't get it, wdym

[@TheMrKlassy]

Now if only Ramsay was better

[@sueblack5794]

I listened to a few of Dave's shows before but didn't like him. Listened to John and gave Dave an answer shot and now listening to both. John is why I listen to Dave, so yes a very good hire.

[@sssrcr85]

Wish the same could be said about the cross eyed dude who’s always kissing his ass.

[@GodSaveTheClothes]

Thank you for saying this is NOT a time for pastors!

[@maureenmyerskoeppel5162]

I'm a pastor and would help them call the cops. Family member or not no child should be molested period. I was molested as a child and nope, I'm going to the cop no matter what.

[@BouncyBrown]

Yes! I've heard horror stories about the "counseling" given by clueless pastors. They just aren't qualified. Some end up victim blaming and adding to the trauma

[@janetarmstrong7010]

@@BouncyBrown Yes, because they don't live in the real world such as most of all society does! I got a book for my Godchild about Good touch vs. bad touch in a book store just yesterday and it is a cute coloring book. As a teacher and a counselor, I have seen parents not even believe their kids! And, I teach high school!! It is so horrible to see the disconnect in these families! A lot of codependency is involved too! My best to you!

[@isay207]

Especially catholics

[@CaToRi-]

@@isay207and JW

[@andreanease4215]

My parents chose to believe my abuser over me. They continued to allow the abuse despite their own suspicions and questioning him. The betrayal and lack of protection from my own family hurt worse than the actual abuse.

[@user-AllenE]

I understand that! Had it happen to me when my family sided with my very evil wife when in process of divorce, very devastating.

[@roberthuber7031]

I am so sorry this happened to you, and you're such an incredibly strong person to have endured so much. I hope you are getting the help you need to heal mentally and move forward with life. Please don't give up. You're a survivor and a fighter. I wish you the best in life and I will keep you in my prayers 🙏.

[@ms.herlan7860]

I'm sorry.

[@thandilechinyavanhu6001]

I just read a story about a man who raped his his 5 year old cousin, went to jail and 2 years did it again. You cannot let abusers around your kids a second time they will do it again!

[@dandelions2414]

I was sexually abused by both my parents growing up until the age of 6 when my sister reported the abuse to a scripture teacher who took action and we were put into state care. I cannot understand what can make a person have such sick desires toward children :( This experience taught me I did have a loving heavenly father in whom alone I could trust and become my hiding place for all my pain and struggles

[@Mariaelaina10]

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’m sorry you weren’t protected and safe by your own parents. Praise God for the Scripture teacher who took action!

[@NickanM]

Sick. I hope that you never have met them again. ❤

[@noirinmcvey2684]

😢😢😢

[@cringechannel4213]

Both parents?! That is messed up what the heck. I am sorry that happened to you. I hope you are doing better today.

[@hopefulfilled9519]

Amen ❤ Only his love can help heal. I’m praying for you and your sister

[@jeanniesabol5410]

Disgusting. You NEVER should let this person back in your life or family. NEVER. Criminal prosecution.

[@JNGL-bw8ux]

Apparently my doctor said I didn’t need therapy. I was 5. I couldn’t really vocalize what happened for 2 years. It was horrible feeling alone that whole time. My parents still never talked to me about it. Until I brought it up in adulthood. I know this trauma has deeply affected me. Please get this child some help.

[@Zopicloned]

My nephew is 5 and the thought of anyone hurting him makes my blood boil. Childhood is precious

[@misstybyers]

My daughter was 5 when it happened to her, but didn’t come forward until she was 7. I went to the police and by the time the detective talked to her, she never brought it up again. I’m not able to bring it up and talk to her about it because it will throw off the case against her abuser. Sadly she hasn’t brought it up again. I believe that her brain has blocked it out but the symptoms are still there, like being unable to trust adult male authority figures, and and playing inappropriately with other children multiple times (children her age). I have her in therapy and we’re all waiting for it to come up so we can help her heal and protect other children. It’s a very heartbreaking waiting game. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I hope you can find healing and peace one day, sooner than later. Sending positive vibes and warm hugs 🫂

[@Ane127]

I’m sorry that they did not get you the help that you needed at the time.

[@chrissiec2123]

I was molested for 3 years by a close family friend when I was a child. My mom was absolutely devastated when I told her what was happening because no one had any reason to suspect anything. It breaks my heart when I hear of children suffering the same evil I endured. I have never been married and don't have children, as I'm only in my early 20s, but hearing stuff like this and remembering what I suffered makes me what to go into overdrive to protect my children if I have any. It makes me want to never drop my kid(s) off and leave them unsupervised at aunty/uncle's, grandma/grandpa's, etc house if I have kids.

[@Diana-zl3ue]

i understood why my parents didnt allow for me to sleep over at any one elses house, even with relatives

[@janemonroe7547]

Sorry to hear such devastating thing no one should ever have to endure. May i ask what made you never speak up or say anything to anyone?

[@chrissiec2123]

@@janemonroe7547 Thanks, Jane. To answer your question, the reason I never spoke up is that my abuser told me not to and said I'd be punished (by my mom, I think?) if I did. (But, when I did speak up, no one punished me. My mom got the police involved and got me therapy.) Plus, as you probably already realize, I was too young to understand what was happening to me, thereby causing me not to think much of it while it was occurring. So, that's why it took me 3 years to speak up.

[@SarahR2D2]

You shouldn't. I don't

[@kimdelaney9775]

@@chrissiec2123 you are a very courageous woman! You will make a great mother when/if you have children. ♥

[@ricotrejo4125]

If I find out a person, family or not, touches my kid like that, I don’t think I could have that level of self control they did

[@lynnebucher6537]

Me neither. I'm normally very even tempered but I think this would drive me to an angry rage.

[@gmarie3053]

I think I’d kill on sight but listening to this I think I’d actually just be in shock

[@SarahR2D2]

But most will still give custody to teachers, coaches, girl scouts, baby sisters, clergy,..

[@janetarmstrong7010]

@@SarahR2D2 I'm a teacher and this is not true at all!! Hell no. Fired on the spot if this is proven by the Board of ED. I, myself have even turned in two teachers who were too forward with two of my female students. Everyone was in shock and thought they were so great as teachers. I was so happy to see them go away!!! They actually retired and I checked up on them! Got them!!! They would have gone to jail if they did not retire and left the area.

[@SarahR2D2]

@@janetarmstrong7010 I was a teacher and almost every other year a teacher is having relationships with students. Some dont get caught

[@jimmygray3452]

As a father of three small daughters, stuff like this horrifies me and makes me want to move to a remote location to protect my family from this disgusting evil. There should be way harsher punishments for people who do this to children. God bless you Dr. Delony. I'm so thankful that a person like you exists and can call this evil for what it is, while also helping people get through it.

[@johnsmith-kt7ef]

tbh their is no punishment enough for these people. They are often given their own wing in prison to "protect them". Even worse is this is Chicago and this type of person will probably be given bail until trial. I'm glad I live in a state and area were if this happens the guy wont end up in jail, and a judge wouldn't even think to take the case against the father if an DA decided to try it.

[@actuarylitten]

@@johnsmith-kt7ef that's so stupid that they do that. They should put pedophiles and rapists next to the prisoners that went to jail for murdering or beating up rapists and child molesters

[@Jozzie1987]

I had a grade 12 biology teacher who said, "I would love to be a judge in those cases. My sentence would be, make the perpetrator climb a ladder, nail his balls to a fence, pull out the ladder and say he's free." People whine, "But that's inhumane!" Yeah, well, inhumane actions deserve inhumane consequences.

[@thylabyrinth]

There's no crime quite as evil as preying on the innocence of a child. It's like an attack on the Good of creation itself.

[@meljordan220]

And to think some people actually want this legal as a sexual preference. I pray God holds back this evil from becoming legal.

[@fremontpathfinder8463]

I don't think a pastor should be involved in this. Deloney is right. This isn't a religious issue. The pastor is not an expert. He needs to cut off contact with the family members who didn't want them to call the police

[@veronicavillasenor5215]

This is so common is so many families. Mine included. The amount of people who want you to forgive and move on is crazy. I wish people would talk about this more often. It's very uncomfortable to talk about out loud but everyone is so used to keeping this hushed. Shame needs to be felt. Justice needs to be had. The outsiders in the family need to be held accountable for defending the pedophile.

[@shahwilloughby4603]

I was horrifically sexually abused by an extended family member when I was 8. It went on for quite some time. When it ended I was told to "keep this quiet, tell NOBODY or YOU will bring shame to this family". I never told a soul until I tried to take my own life at the age of 21. I am 54 now and it has affected my whole life for 46 years. Not just the sexual abuse but the way my mother DIDN'T handle it.

[@MSSHARIII]

@@shahwilloughby4603 😔😔😔

[@CassandraV-kl4hq]

From the little girl inside of me, thank you for fighting for your daughter and taking actions. From 5-16 I was graped/m0lested by 2 ppl. When I was 3 my male babysitter did it to me and burned my brothers and I’s ankles. 5 my Mom and sissy passed away from a drunk driver and my grandfather started all over again from 5-16. I love how he said start her in therapy. She is going to need it. Sometimes it still hits me and I’m 37 now. I pray for her healing and your family to heal. This isn’t fun to navigate and is confusing.

[@ClaireGreen-wd2gm]

Is your grandfather dead now?

[@elyssaweber5591]

Me too!! I had tons of therapy!! And it is ongoing work.

[@CassandraV-kl4hq]

@@ClaireGreen-wd2gmI wish. He actually a few years back got caught doing it to my cousins 9 yr old daughter. After watching the news and Matt Lauer got into trouble, my cousin heard her daughter breaking down in the shower w a cry she’s never heard. Finally after getting it out of her, she told her Mom. Now, backstory when I was younger my grandmother turned my family against me telling them that I was promiscuous and that I was a liar and not to believe anything that came out of my mouth because she knew it was going on so my cousin and I didn’t have a close relationship. She reached out to me on Facebook sending me a huge apology told me she knew what it happened to me when I was younger and explain to me what happened to her daughter. She told me she was calling the police and that they wanted to talk to me after going back-and-forth with it I agreed to it. Come to find out he had been doing this to his own daughter when she was a kid and had done this to four generations of children. He was arrested they put him in jail and he had always told us that if we told on him that he would play deaf dumb and stupid and that’s exactly what he did. Before he got arrested he was still working driving going out with friends etc. but then all of a sudden he comes out with Alzheimer’s. So with all the evidence they had they decided that after a year in jail they couldn’t put him on trial so they said that they were going to commit him to a mental facility until the state or the mental facility felt that he was no longer a risk. After three months they released him and said well he has Alzheimer’s so he won’t do it anymore he he doesn’t even remember what he’s done which was total bull crap so me and 12 other of my family members have been living in constant hell after being all drugged up and writing these statements and having all of us go on and come back in our lives some of us are married with children and it just literally turned our lives upside down all over again. When he got caught and was going to get arrested he went down to the shore with a gun and was going to unalive himself does that sound like somebody that’s innocent or that doesn’t remember what they did but because he’s Catholic he didn’t go through with it. So nope he still living his best life while we’re trying to pick up the pieces. And the detective said after talking to your grandmother for not even two minutes I knew she knew the entire time it was going on. He said he was so disgusted by it. And then my grandmother said to everybody I don’t understand why you just could’ve waited until he died to tell people. I used talk to text so excuse the grammar and punctuation, I apologize.

[@lorim2000]

100% agree with John. I’m a Christian and have been in a lot of churches and ministries, a lot of pastors give terrible advice when it comes to abuse. Lots of ‘protecting your bother’ ie meaning keep things quiet to manage behind the scenes, they mean well, they believe in that process, but allows for a cycle of abuse.

[@FRAME5RS]

Yep, refer to the whole Josh Duggar mess

[@marteumar8429]

@E lol you’re delusional. This is not modern church being spineless. This is church hiding a activity that is part of church culture and has always being, it has nothing to do with modernity or being spineless.

[@7somekindofsomething]

@E No need to be sorry. Saying what needs to be said.

[@purplelove3666]

Those people are very useless, question their morals

[@mamameg9916]

It’s also that pastors aren’t licensed therapists.

[@kelleygarrison5711]

I was a forensic interviewer for 4 years. It's such an important job and is highly underappreciated and doesn't get enough credit. It's a difficult thing to listen to a child talk about very graphic sexual things. As a parent it's gonna be scary to let them go through the process because you don't want them to suffer anymore than they have but trust the process. It's important and there for a reason. Nurses that do those exams, especially on kids, are specifically trained for that and will do everything they can to make it as comfortable for the child as possible and will never force them to do something they aren't ok with. Child Advocacy Centers are nonprofit organizations that assist with these services and need support.

[@lyricsoftheart]

I can only imagine. How did you get a job like that? What did you go to school for?

[@kelleygarrison5711]

@@lyricsoftheart I got a degree in psychology. I worked at a mental health agency for 3 years before I went there and worked mostly with kids. Once I was hired I was sent to forensic interviewing of children training. Then I did various other trainings throughout my 4 years there. I did 999 interviews in my time as a forensic interviewer. A lot of practice definitely helps.

[@roberthuber7031]

Thank you for the work you do. People who choose to do your type of work are truly angels walking amongst us. I honestly don't know how forensic interviewers such as yourself or pediatric oncologist nurses are capable of enduring so much mentally day after day because it must be extremely difficult not to be emotionally invested. I just want to say thank you for everything you do. You are truly an asset to your community and I wish you the best.

[@tinaferr]

Thank you for this comment. Very useful information. I hope you're okay given all the horrors you must have heard.

[@Amaryllis-4U]

I heard of a case locally about a young girl, probably 10, who was being molested by her father. I think she told someone at school and police were called. Not sure if the mom had been aware this was going on. However she behaved very cruelly the day the husband was sentenced. After the trial when it was time to leave, the girl started to follow her mom. But the mom turned around angrily said, “where are you going? It’s all your fault! Now who’s going to pay the bills and take care of us?” The aunt (mom’s sister) approached her sister and said, “what is wrong with you? This is not her fault!!!” She then turned to the girl and told her, “come with me - you can stay with me.”

[@sharlisaharris8046]

Horrible

[@bonnemoms5413]

That's awful 😢

[@allthatsheiz]

Lord have mercy 😢

[@angelatocco6839]

Yeah i cant wrap my heart and head around that. I hope she is surrounded by people who love her.

[@Parakeetfriend4215]

That sounds like what would happen in my family. I see those same attitudes.

[@lynnebucher6537]

Parents, please let your kids know about good touch vs bad touch, and make sure they can always come to you and you will protect them from future harm.

[@teresamagnusson]

There is no good touch

[@ouwebrood497]

This is the most important thing.

[@TenemenTTrash]

​@@teresamagnusson hugs are good touches, physical intimacy is important in human development at all ages. Intimacy and touch ≠ sexual

[@teresamagnusson]

​@@TenemenTTrashYou can let people touch your kids if you want. My kids are off limits.

[@harlandfriendofgod6108]

There is so much wisdom in what you said. Always get the cops involved to get them prosecuted and these perverts belong in jail.

[@cat5281]

my whole family didn't believe me when I said my dad SA'd me, he manipulated them into thinking I "misunderstood" the situation and now I haven't spoken to any of them in 4/5 years, the only time my brother has reached out is to relay a message from him saying how he's "sad" he's missing another one of my birthdays. I gave brother a long ass message pouring my heart out to him, but he just left me on read. Now I have a new family, a wonderful, supporting partner and 2 amazing step kids. They're the only family I have.

[@tochi8061]

Sending so much love to you and your family.

[@SunFlower-sc5jl]

I got molested by family friend at age 9, I knew my dad would do nothing about it. My mother got molested by my grandfather and my dad told her to keep quiet. Seeing this family take action is healing my hurt heart , thank god there are parents that would take a stand.

[@mattgowans547]

This made me cry. As a father of an 8 year old little girl I can't even imagine. God bless her and your family.

[@Joel-pg4yi]

Bad stuff started happening to me then I was way younger I think and lasted till 20s I think my life will never be normal than it comes to people communication

[@EA-gv2ph]

It's unbelievable how some people can be truly evil. There's nothing as evil and sick as SA to a child.

[@7somekindofsomething]

Yeah this really shook me too.

[@harlandfriendofgod6108]

@@Joel-pg4yionly is you forgive you self and others and try a little counseling with a trustworthy Christian counselor; or licensed therapy

[@amydoran9987]

He did the right thing having him arrested.

[@7somekindofsomething]

100%. Not even a question.

[@GeorgiaMostly]

No kidding

[@Crissy24ful]

People are disgusting. Seriously harming a child is as low as it goes.

[@tinaferr]

They're totally off. They don't see it as harm...or in some cases are confused bc it happened to them. Tons of these people out there and it's terrifying.

[@firelordplayz]

It's amazing how a single touch can ruin a person's life potentially even forever in terms of her future relationships, trust issues, intimacy, anxiety etc. If that's not evil then I don't know what it is.

[@amyitis]

You hit the nail right on the head with that.... that trauma gets stored in the body and comes out in various ways, for a long time and sometimes even life.

[@rameysavoie7442]

As a nonbeliever, this is refreshing to hear this advice on a somewhat Christian platform. This daughter will eventually make it because of the help of her great parents.

[@farcenter]

Same. I was really impressed and relieved when he said the thing I was worried about right away. Gotta give him a lot of credit. He handled it really well too.

[@stardustgirl2904]

As a survivor I know this issue is much bigger than just going to a therapist! This issue is attached to the soul of a person and requires greater healing than just talking to someone! God 👑 brings us unconditional love and comfort, that heals the soul! God gave us life and he cares more about us then a therapist does! I never would of made it without prayer 🙏🏻and reading the scriptures and putting my faith in him. I became stronger 💪🏼 and more resilient and found to push back on this evil 👿 in the world ❗🌍

[@IloveJesus777j77]

Jesus is coming back. Believe He died for your sins and rose again then repent to be saved.

[@IloveJesus777j77]

​@@stardustgirl2904Jesus is coming back. Believe He died for your sins and rose again then repent to be saved.

[@IloveJesus777j77]

​@@farcenterJesus is coming back. Believe He died for your sins and rose again then repent to be saved.

[@minziwinzi2554]

God bless this strong family. Finally a father standing for his family. So many adults try to minimize sexual abuse with kids because of their incapability to bear the consequences of calling it out for what it is. It is so important to get professional help for the daughter. Thank you, parents of the girl. This will be tough

[@Njd454]

If I was her father I'd be making this call from prison

[@raaewrh]

And my first thought then becomes: great job making sure your kid doesn't have a rolemodel who will be their support and safe person. Good job being willing to risk continuing the traumatic event since its more likely than not, that the child would blame themselves for their parent being in jail. You are there because they tell themselves/convince themselves that it's their fault, they should have hid it betrer, you are now gone and you arewilling to risk your child blamingthemselves, thinking things like its their fault, they didn't fight back hard enough, Believe me. I get the rage. But believe me more, as someone who survived brutal r"pe as a child, where I was burned repeatedly with a cigarrette and the metalpart of a lighter. As the person r"ping me wanted to make sure that I would never be allowed to forget. I tried telling my mom, she told me to stop making things up. Even though she knew it was real. She saw the burnmarks. She saw the bloody underwear. She let me down. Couldn't turn to my dad, he would have done what you said. I couldn't handle the fact that my dad would lose his freedom because of me. So I kept quiet. Then.. I realized I was pregnant. I was 12 and all alone in this world. I nearly lost my life. My life spiraled fast after that. I had no family with me when I was having the abortion. I had a friends mom, who now sadly have passed away due to cancer, but she made sure I wasn't alone during my abortion and her family became my other home whenever I got tired of living on the streets, sneaking into buildings to sleep under stairs, ending up with dangerous people, in dangerous situations over and over again. I was so broken, and had so hard trusting anyone, even the other family because my parents reactions made me lose my sense and ability to trust. So, I couldn't shake the uncertainty that became a part of me, I always felt that if I stayed with the friends family, my parents would eventually find me and come there to get me and blame me for reacting and acting out for "made up things" as mom said, or having my dad finding out what made me change from a happy, smart, curious little girl To the... I suppose.. monster that evolved because of the built up memories. I lived an insane and traumatic life after that and it took nearly 16 years to become a somewhat functioning humanbeing again.

[@Njd454]

@@raaewrh cool story bro

[@raaewrh]

@@Njd454 what?

[@Loakley1998]

Then she would also not have her father on top of all of this.

[@jayoh360]

@@raaewrh i think hes made it clear he doesnt actually care about children or their abuse, he just wants to kill somebody. Sorry that happened to you truly.

[@Sinderella1987]

I have learned that every time you keep quiet, you are keeping his peace not your peace

[@7somekindofsomething]

Protect your kids. It’s a sad reality, but you have to treat EVERYONE with a level of caution.

[@Nah-ah]

Tough call! I had an incident of a family friend doing this to me when I was 9. Getting blamed for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, outside playing with my siblings was apparently my fault. I simply never trusted even my own family to have my back, never!

[@보모]

Guardians refusing to do the work rather place responsibility of sorting out the wrong doing on a child’s shoulders to keep their peace. Levels of betrayal where is was not on him yet *bad* when you took note of it _people having kids and failing them even in emotion_

[@eurekahope5310]

I'm so sorry!!!

[@Lalalu74]

Im sorry you went through that.

[@iloveny22]

Don’t trust them. That is the right move unfortunately. I didn’t know how bad of a response like that was. It is the ultimate betrayal. More than a cheating spouse, if a family/parents not protecting a child is the ultimate betrayal.

[@swiftswamps0821]

I’m a victim of a situation like this and man you NAILED it when you were talking about the pastors and the guidance counselors(I am a Christian I just don’t think pastors are the best for situations like this)With situations as high caliber as being molested simple talks and suggestions are USELESS!! Coming from someone who went to guidance counselors and had small talks with family after being molested. You need to see a trauama based therapist/specialist for situations like this but I would also recommend the victim a psychological assessment because situations like these are major breeding grounds for mental illness such as OCD, PTSD, panic disorder, BPD, etc. But you nailed it!

[@misswiss278]

thank god he didnt advise him to get help from a pastor and advised him to go to an actual professional..

[@mariannehavisham8323]

I think advising someone to get help from a pastor if they are a Christian is fine so long as you ALSO encourage them to get professional support (it doesn't have to be either/or) if someone practices a faith spiritual support is important and can work well alongside therapy/mental health support

[@jazgal1cooks115]

Never understood family protecting monsters happens too often in families it’s scary

[@beaglerescue5281]

My family tried to protect a predator who made attempts to groom my daughter. I left the family for five years immediately. I was so hurt, confused and angry. My child never spent alone time with anyone in my family.

[@DrGoldieMD]

This is heartbreaking. I just thank God that he and his wife are able to support their daughter and get her the help she needs. It’s crazy that some family members aren’t supportive. It’s people like that, that allow abuse to carry on from generation to generation.

[@Emy53]

Why are you thanking God? What am I missing?

[@DrGoldieMD]

@@Emy53 did you read my reply? They are getting support for the daughter.

[@jojotheoj]

@@DrGoldieMD God didn’t call the cops or get her support. Where was God while it was happening? Your reasoning is wild.

[@DrGoldieMD]

@@jojotheoj why blame God for humans that are evil? We have free will.

[@jojotheoj]

@@DrGoldieMD Great point. That’s precisely why I would give the parents credit here. It doesn’t make sense to give God credit for good human behavior but not the bad.

[@weekendnomad5038]

I’m so glad you had him arrested. Most victims of SA never get any justice .. like me.. it’s going to be really tough for her to get over. I’m so sorry for what y’all are going through

[@nberger6984]

I’d love to understand the psychology behind why sexual predators are so protected. I’d be in jail if something happened to my child.

[@rossfriedman6570]

My best friend took his life in 2021. He dealt with this sort of thing for many years as a kid. The parents never bothered stepping in to stop it

[@cringechannel4213]

I’m sorry to hear that man. I hope you find healing and may God rest his soul.

[@elizabethmurray7815]

I am a survivor of sexual molestation by my stepfather. That was ignored by my mother & followed up abuse from them both. What my life became was create by those actions. It took me 63yrs of living in guilt shame further abuse (husband & drugs) Before after 12yrs of therapy I was set free from my mental torment I am finally happy - I love me

[@_evelyn_reyes_]

Please do not allow your children to sit on anyone’s lap. It does not matter who.

[@dontarguewithidiots7459]

I know someone to whom this happened. Molestation by an uncle (dad's brother) at 13. ANNNND they swept it under the rug. ANNNND weren't especially supportive of the victim (left her to deal with things on her own). Thank GOD this family had the COURAGE to deal with it and have him arrested.

[@shehnazahmad5213]

I never said this ever to ANYONE. My uncle molested me I think I was 11 years. He used to tell me. Don't tell anyone. Nobody will like our friendship. I never thought it was wrong. Until when I was 20 years😢

[@robinc2651]

I'm sorry 😢

[@jleach3413]

❤ I hope you find healing

[@Plutonium.2]

I’m glad you spoke up now. He lied and took advantage. I hope you can get some rest from it now

[@lyricsoftheart]

Seek a trauma counselor and go from there…

[@katesmith8424]

I'm so sorry. It's significant that you've been able to say this for the first time. And I agree with the above comment that it could be good to seek professional help, if you're feeling ready for it.

[@Testfordre]

Props to these parents for taking action, and doing the right thing in a very difficult situation. My sister was molested by her cousin when she was young and my parents did nothing. My dad did nothing to stand up for his young daughter. It still sickens me to this day. Years later, that cousin is in prison for doing things to his own own children and other neighborhood children. But he has never paid for the crimes that he committed against my sister when she was a young girl. And apology letter is not enough. My sister is still confusedabout a lot of things, but is an amazing person as she’s raising her own family. Thank you for showing us the right way to handle this situation. Families do not cover up secrets like this. Get the authorities involved and do the right thing.

[@Mitzi73]

I would not have called the police. They would have had to call the police on me.

[@revolution5298]

As sickening as it is to hear this, I am so glad that this is being recorded so this dad can come on here and listen to it as many times as he wants.

[@Guitarlvr01]

There is no relationship worth not protecting your child, or any child. This man and wife are the right kind of team. More children will be protected because of their actions.

[@MurzelMachtMusik]

I am a daughter that wasn't believed. So big heartfelt thank you to this family and the good advice. My trauma helpers were a trauma therapist, a social pedagogic trauma advisor from a help center for women and a very special priest who dealt with helping abused people alot. He is now a very close friend of mine. I found all three extremely helpful. But they are all three atypical in their respective fields. So it is so important to look for people you can trust and healing ways that fit you. That doesn't mean, it won't hurt as hell to go, but it will be safe to go.

[@kyledamron]

This was the best advice he could have been given. I was molested and wasnt given the help recommended and i struggled my entire life. Its necessary

[@purplelove3666]

I am so sorry,I hope you are able to heal, pray to God about it and if the molester is still alive, report him !.or her!

[@lukefisch9483]

Makes me pretty angry, the trick is to work it out with a good professional and then be able to feel a moving on from that experiences

[@MsMandsa]

Thank you. I was a 3 to 6 year old when this happened. And it's been a monkey on my back despite how much I've tried to heal and move on from it. I'm 41 now.

[@colouredlioness2199]

Hugs

[@user-xk4ei1sb3q]

I’ll never forget a physician once explained the difference between pleasure and enjoyment. Pleasure is the product of stimulation of the limbic system in our brain. That stimulation evolved to remember things that made us feel good. Purely: pleasurable stimulus-> limbic neurons fire-> signal of pleasure. Enjoyment requires more advanced brain structures that give us the ability to CHOOSE what we like and don’t like. Prefrontal lobe is one important structure. The main difference is you can’t choose what is pleasurable (aka what activities your limbic system). But the ability to reason through what stimuli one enjoys and choosing to reencounter the stimulus under one’s control. That’s why abuse like this is often described as confusing by the victims. I thinks this is such an important lesson for everyone to understand. Hope that little girl and the family heals.

[@alisonsattler6396]

Unbelievable that family members would allow the abuse and protect the abuser!!! Sickening!

[@LifeDIY]

I'm so sorry for what has happened to this man's daughter. I was listening to this video as I was getting ready this morning and it brought flashbacks of my childhood. Not everyone has parents who love them this much (or at all, sadly) or as much as John Delony loves his daughter. It was insightful to hear what should have been said to me from my parents, but never was.

[@user-lt1jd1ye3v]

♥️♥️

[@terryellis7692]

Same here. My mother said she was devastating I'm once sentence and then in another "you ever think maybe HE was molested too"!?! She made it about her and my dad didn't believe me. I'm single at 47. Gee wonder y

[@jest3167]

If you caught your brother doing something like that with your 5 yr old daughter you should be in jail for manslaughter by now

[@rickardotorres]

You are a hero to your family and a valuable asset to humanity for being so courageous and healthy. You did what so many millions of “parents” have not been able to do. Hearing this father has giving me hope.

[@SarahR2D2]

And he prevented more abuse

[@mwolf0259]

Thank you John. As a father of a 3 and 4 year old, this is one of my biggest fears. I appreciate hearing the support and advice you have to offer.

[@ihateallyall]

my dad had to raise us two daughters. he was scared of this as well. he said my uncle wanted to play basketball with me alone when I was 5, that he should bring me over for lessons, my uncle said. my dad said he got the worst feeling about it and told him that would never happen. he needed up being caught being sexually involved with a 15 year old he was coaching for basketball, when he was 50… also was sending sexual texts to other players 13-16. so my dad was right - I likely would have been raped by my uncle. the key is - NEVER leave your child alone with anyone, as much as you’re capable. family gathering? keep an eye on them at all times. sitting on someone’s lap funny? remove them from it. someone showing any special interest in your children, especially one in particular? keep them far away from that person just in case.

[@amnah10000]

Heartbreaking! My husband and I have 4 young kids 11 and younger and we don't blindly trust our kids with relatives, be it my siblings, uncles and his, when it comes to sexual assaults of young kids those that do this evil are mostly those closest to you because we trust them, we shouldn't trust them alone with our kids, make sure your kids know no one is allowed to touch them or be alone with them and that they should always tell you what happens.

[@hannahwilliams2143]

My father did this to me and a few of my sisters for several years. The shame and guilt that came along with blaming yourself and being disgusted in yourself for it ‘feeling good’ but mostly it just felt good to be loved since it was the only attention I got from my dad. Nobody talked about it for a long time, it started coming out in my late twenties when a couple of my sisters had children and decided to say something and half of the family refused to believe it, they and my dad literally called us me-tooers, all five of us. My father even tried to brush it off and said we were lying for attention. I confronted him and he acted like a pathetic coward saying I should’ve stopped him (I was 8) but I never heard or felt an apology from him. I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do with it all tbh. I lost a lot of trust and lost bonds with a lot of family members unfortunately :(

[@rickjames4031]

You cut off that fantasy and. Ever talk to your bio dad again. Don’t feel bd about anything. He forfeited his relationship with his adult daughter. Don’t even show face at his funeral one day. Continue to live. Stay strong.

[@Hatbox948]

Omg, how awful.

[@rtphotos4691]

Report him to the police. He most likely has other victims.

[@truthmerchant1]

How dare he try to put the responsibility for his evil actions onto you. He doesn't deserve to be in your life. He has no remorse. You deserve a good life without him in it.

[@el5880]

Please as the Dr said, get into Trauma Informed Therapy ASAP. What you went through was extremely traumatic and you need someone with professional help to guide you safely.

[@bradleymaravalli2851]

I am mentally and emotionally exhausted just from hearing this tragic story. I can't imagine what it would be like to actually live it. Stay strong Tom! Love that you and your wife are able to stay connected through this all. You two being strong and getting the right counseling is going to result in you two supporting and loving your daughter (and son) well!

[@chrysiarose]

What happens to these guys that want to be with a baby, a young child? This is so gross, and is all too common.

[@meganchristensen3378]

Often they've been molested themselves (or exposed to porn early in their lives). Not an excuse, but it can be a contributing factor. Having been molested myself, I just can't understand what would push someone who may have been molested to keep the cycle of abuse going. Ugh. Just thinking about bringing the pain I went through onto another child just makes me ill.

[@Wintersnow889]

Exactly. Often times they were molested themselves or they are just off in their head.

[@SarahR2D2]

@@meganchristensen3378 😭😭😭

[@dbacks2023-]

I read somewhere there is a deformity/defect in their brains with the sexual center of the brain being too close or connected to their thoughts of children

[@shelbysycamore637]

Sick people with a power lust that manifests in ways they choose indulge in.

[@hyrunnisa997]

This scares me so much because this is so common in my family. I am really glad most of the molesters/rapers in my family are dead or have 1 foot in the grave.

[@camellia8625]

That’s awful. I am sorry you have been subjected (or exposed) to that

[@suzannepayne8934]

Age won't stop them!!!!!!!!!! I know.

[@SarahR2D2]

Because people nowadays don't get it, if you dont take your life savings every where and trust it with every one, than your kids that are more valuable than your life savings should not be trusted with anyone and everyone. Forget the friends, camps, church youth groups etc. These people take advantage of trust. People volunteering to babysit etc dont do it. MOST people dont trust people with their money but will trust their children with them.

[@icecreamcake1457]

EXACTLY!

[@oliviastar3812]

Well said.

[@NicholsKT]

Damn. Great comparison 🤔

[@tessajones9393]

100%

[@jackie.mendoza]

I’m gonna have trouble sleeping after this one. Oh man. BUT these calls are important. So many of my friends have gone through this, and it could be so healing to hear.

[@SarahR2D2]

I waited till the morning to watch this

[@Daniel-tx2vt]

Many? Jesus…

[@jackie.mendoza]

@@Daniel-tx2vt yup :(

[@AC00009]

Pastors are not trained mental health professionals. So many people never get the help they need because families start and stop with a religious leader. So glad he said this clearly.

[@noeevazquez5956]

I’d be calling him from jail after murdering the abuser .

[@fishmonger7020]

Bro I can’t believe that isn’t standard protocol.

[@sub-harmonik]

you'd spend years of your life putting away a scumbag? you must not have that much else going on

[@Mary.Shannon]

Yup.

[@agricolaregs]

No sleep overs for my 7 year old. Nope.

[@Hatbox948]

Very wise.

[@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife]

Notice this didn't happen at a sleepover. Use your intuition about who's safe to be around your kids or never leave them alone.

[@Hatbox948]

@@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife I did have the step father of one of my daughter's childhood friends expose himself to both of them when my daughter spent the night there. My daughter's life has been punctuated with these kind of incidents. Her own biological dad molested her at age 12. We were already divorced. You can never be too careful. The outcome is devastating.

[@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife]

@@Hatbox948 like I said, use your intuition. No sleepovers doesn't mean your kids are in the clear

[@MrElizabeth4343]

My parents didn’t let me go to sleepovers either. My Molester was a family member I was 4 years old when it started. It’s mostly family members not strangers. My mom was over protective to the point it scared me and in my young mind meant if I said anything I might be lock away or make her mad. There’s nothing wrong with being protective just make sure they feel safe to talk.

[@TaterKakez]

I’m at 8:01, this listened to you say “she’s going to need to learn that something shameful and evil was done to her, but she is not, her body is not, shameful… etc” That made me sob. I was a child, around 6, the first time I was abused. I still struggle with feeling shame towards sexuality and not feeling good about myself bc of this. I’m almost 40, I don’t want to be defeatist but I feel like it will always be a part of me at this point

[@a.skywalker6340]

Praying for you. I’ve been there.

[@tashodonnell86]

My brain literally cant comprehend how his wife was so composed when she saw it happening! 🤯 The only way that man would have left my house would have been in a box!

[@JackBlackwithadashofWeirdAl]

Shock, self control. Not wanting to further traumatize her child by freaking out. Children can easily misinterprete yelling and think they are doing something wrong. Her first instinct was to act on the well being of her child/ her child feelings, not her own anger towards that creep. I'm sure she lost it later on away from her daughter.

[@dipsuny]

I take back all my criticism of this show..great work and thank you. Jesus please lay your hands on this family and that sweet child! 🙏

[@lynnc5291]

Also unfortunately you need to keep a close eye on the child who was victimized..because they could put some of what they have learned to use towards other children not knowing they shouldn’t even know about it. I say this because of experience with a family friend…the victim can easily turn into the offender if not given enough support or knowledge of the seriousness.

[@oliviastar3812]

That's a valid point few commenters appear to realise; should the same consideration be given to the offender adult, as to understanding where their behaviour came from too? It's hard to comprehend these things, so maybe there's some clue in what you've pointed out.

[@lynnc5291]

@@oliviastar3812 you couldn’t give the same consideration to adults, adults must always ask for consent no matter their past..adult brains are fully mature and we are aware of right and wrong etc. where as a child would not be aware and if they are mimicking the abuse done to them toward another child they might have no knowledge of wrong doing. These situations are too different to treat them similarly.

[@FloralLife02]

This is what happened to me, I was 5yrs old when I was molested by a 12yr old, who had also be taken advantage of.

[@ChuckDanser]

​@@lynnc5291100% agreed. There is a big difference in making sure a child doesn't abuse other children because of their own victimization and applying this to an adult who knows right from wrong and still chooses to do wrong

[@DianneElizabeth64]

I wonder if the family that is upset about the police also has some big secrets they don’t want out. The molester got it from somewhere

[@libertyna933]

Such a horrific situation but this little girl is so lucky to have these parents. They did the right things. I hope there are good trauma therapists for healing in their community.

[@peggybaby0894]

Can we please hug this mom too. She did the best job in the situation while her whole heart was breaking for her baby girl. She made sure she didn’t cause further trauma to both her children. 😢

[@HowieRaps]

Its absolutely disgusting how many people were molested and their abuser had no consequences. Goodness, it is infuriating.

[@brittany7573]

When I was a teen, the process with the police was more traumatic than what my abuser did. Nothing came of it too. If I could go back in time, I wouldn't have reported it. Sadly, had a similar experience with my daughter, nothing came of it. They come in and do their job and leave you there to pick up all the pieces. I hate this for any family.

[@hollytalbott7291]

I’m so sorry that happened to you, and it’s such a betrayal (like if the parents don’t believe the child)!! When I reported my daughter’s abuser (her dad) he pleaded no contest and was given 1 year of unsupervised probation.

[@Bobowallie]

My cousin molested me when we were both kids, but as a 10 year old girl, this stayed with me….now that I’m a 30 year old adult, I told this to my mother one day after she commented on some things that triggered this memory. She just kind of dismissed my claim…making excuses for my cousin, sth like “he was a child and didn’t mean to”. So I know what is like to feel like not being understood let alone being protected and supported. So good job to the dad for being there for your baby ❤

[@rainravenish]

I was one of the fortunate ones. I was always deeply suspicious of anyone who wanted to get me alone, so I never would go. I could sense weird tensions in some people, so I'd avoid them. I wouldn't go into those dark places, like behind the school after class, or down the alley behind the shops. I think my mother taught me this, in a round-about way. I am eternally grateful.

[@oliviaacosta6239]

That happened in my family and my family chose to include him at family functions. I now don’t have a relationship with most of my family members which I don’t care. My poor daughter has suffered and is still suffering and some am I. It’s devastating when people you trust hurt you the most.

[@camellia8625]

That is horrendous. Such disloyalty

[@isay207]

Horrible family condoning this

[@skully0078]

This Dad is amazing simply for the fact he asked for direction. My parents did nothing and I've never gotten that monkey off my back. I hate my parents for that because it told me I meant nothing to them. This hit hard.

[@carnivoreRon]

My wife was a victim. It happened after a church service in her Sunday school classroom. She screamed as someone walked in the hallway. When he was pulled off her, he had his knee between her legs and her dress over her head. Her parents did not press charges against him. He was an elder in their church.

[@katehenry2718]

"elder" means nothing. Parents were idiots. Would they lay down for this man so he could rape them instead? Not likely.

[@fortinm.6975]

That is why I dont trust anyone supervising my child, family or church