My Fiancé Is Still Married (Now She’s Cheating on ME!)

My Fiancé Is Still Married (Now She’s Cheating on ME!)
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[@KrystleLaughter]

Lesson: Don't date married people.

[@FourSeasons04]

Ain't that the truth! People continously create their own problems with bad choices.

[@annberlin5811]

@@FourSeasons04 play the tape to the end

[@kaidiver4306]

PERIOD!!!!

[@milotatino8658]

How you get them is how you lose them 😬

[@boxesbinslidsllc]

💯

[@turbolabamerica]

Don’t waste your money on marriage counseling, for a marriage that isn’t yours.

[@SarahR2D2]

Ouch 💯💯💯

[@bajanbryan4908]

😬😬😆 Bars! Couldn't have said it better!

[@johniii8147]

He didn't mention marriage counseling. It was counseling for himself to heal. John was very clear she's done and to move on.

[@greatvid4648]

@@johniii8147 he said marrage counseling before his counseling. He did say it

[@60Airflyte]

Amen.

[@jwebby85]

If they’ll cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you. And yes, being engaged while you’re still married is cheating.

[@Losochill]

That’s so not true! It’s an old wise tale that is outdated.

[@foedeer]

Cheating was not the issue, but clearly thats all you will ever see.

[@icantthinkofascreenname3064]

@foedeer Did you actually listen? They started dating, got engaged, & moved in together all while she’s still married. The way he described it sounded like she went straight from her husband’s house to his, no mention of separation prior. That is the definition of cheating.

[@sgtmonkeypirate]

@@foedeerwtf rewatch the video

[@meganchambers8108]

​@@Losochill lol it's old "wives" tale.

[@reserved845]

Its a pretty good rule: If they cheat WITH you.... They'll cheat ON you. I feel bad for the guy... but... not really.

[@Melissa.712]

The caller is a genius

[@zeal4god402]

Never be with someone who runs away from relationship problems and is not solution-oriented

[@rachelgooden9981]

Everyone always thinks their situation is different and sometimes it is. I’ve had guy friends that have been in this situation and they go on to have long marriages and both happy. I’ve had friends like the female too. And they can and sometimes do find long lasting relationships while in an entanglement with others.

[@terriesmith2616]

@@rachelgooden9981 Exceptions don't make the rules.

[@strnglhld]

@@zeal4god402 Exactly. They’re demonstrating how they face adversity by never facing it. It’s not magically different with you!

[@Rydrsv]

If your partner still being married isn’t a RED FLAG, I don’t know what is 🤦‍♀️

[@raspberrykissable]

I would say typically yes. I am still married going through a divorce. We have been separated for more than a year. Just waiting on the paperwork. I am not a cheater and never have been but I am starting to date because I want a good man and kids, and am sick of being alone. I have been alone most of my marriage. There are exceptions but I certainly would find it a red flag.

[@terriesmith2616]

@@raspberrykissable If the divorce is not finalized, I wouldn't even date. That's just messy. Adding other people into one's own mess.

[@raspberrykissable]

@@terriesmith2616 each to their own. After years of being alone being legally separated is good enough until the final paperwork.

[@strnglhld]

@@raspberrykissable You know how many times I’ve heard this, only for them to decide to try again? That’s why you’re not supposed to date people until they’re divorced.

[@raspberrykissable]

@@strnglhld oh I’ve seen it as well. I have tried everything and I left an abusive marriage. There is nothing left there. I have absolutely no feelings for my ex in fact I can’t wait to never talk to him again. But you are right I have seen it as well.

[@taloulaskitchen]

I would HIGHLY recommend a paternity test too. She seems to be searching for validation through physical touch.

[@rachelgooden9981]

Good point

[@ellencox8415]

DING DING DING paternity is the FIRST THING before lawyers to understand what you're fighting for.

[@coolaunt516]

@@ellencox8415 I agree to a point but even if they are not his, he won't give them up. He isn't the type to run out and leave them with a mom who ignores them.

[@jeromehenry4484]

I'm questioning the 4 miscarriages before "his" two children. Was she really pregnant 4 times? or did she really have 4 abortions? Either way, that's really messed up. Definitely get DNA tests on these two children. If they are his, then he needs to get an attorney PRONTO! He should not try for custody of child from prior marriage. He will need to tread very carefully to legally get primary custody of his two children; don't screw it up because of a moment of grief/anger.

[@michaelwilson145777]

I am Michael, the caller from Portland. We did indeed have 4 miscarriages. I was there for all of them. And I don't need a paternity test when both kids look just like me

[@lashaonda]

My mama always told me, "The way you get them is how you'll lose them". Sorry to this man.

[@amde8554]

That’s a great saying and true

[@rickardotorres]

I agree. I have been there, both sides. I hate sayings and cliches but… where there is smoke there is fire.

[@DarknessFalls29]

Facts!

[@lilo2469]

Always Listen to your MAMA

[@tspain432]

AGREED! What was he thinking? How many single women did he pass up?

[@MidlifeCredo]

What “next right thing”? Pursue a married woman, date a married woman, move in with a married woman, have kids with a married woman. Now be surprised that she’s cheating on you when she’s been *cheating on her husband for years* and you’ve been cheating with someone else’s wife. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@LisaLisaCJ]

He is a pure 🤡

[@beesknees213]

I know ......make it make sense....... I'll wait...

[@Ruth-vy1qj]

Karma is no joke both of them cheated on their spouses I don’t feel him. You don’t respect the marriage vows of your own marriage and/or someone else it don’t pose to be blessed. It don’t pose work out successful.

[@sooperdooper7]

Perfectly said

[@jpegjake]

He didn't cheat...

[@sarahbess1210]

I got cheated on by my first husband. He had twins with a “friend” (also married-with three little kids). Twins were born before our divorce was even final. 9 months later he called me crying because she’d cheated on him. I told him: “Well, you know how I handled the same situation. Good luck.” Best thing that ever happened to me was the breaking off of that relationship. That gal was a pawn. That guy was going to cheat anyway. I’m not into Jerry Springer. Walk. Away. From. Married. People. ESPECIALLY IF THEY’RE UNHAPPY!!!

[@strnglhld]

The nerve of crying on the shoulder of the person you cheated on about how you got cheated on. Ridiculous!!!

[@snOags]

Yeah. I guess you got to see his true colors and I'm sorry that happened to you. Awful.

[@sarahbess1210]

@@strnglhld You get bitter or you get better. He made his own mess and made himself miserable. I just feel badly for those kids. They didn’t ask for any of that.

[@sarahbess1210]

@@snOags Thank you for saying that. It just goes to show we were made to complement each other in marriage, not complete each other. Marriage works when two “whole” people go all in. I tried doing 200% to make up for him not being all in. It was never going to be enough. He did me a favor cutting me loose.

[@snOags]

@@sarahbess1210 well said. Thanks for sharing wise words.

[@zeal4god402]

He gets romantically involved with a woman with weak boundaries in her marriage who instead of working on repairing her marriage, melts in his arms while she is having marital issues. So when she and him have relationship issues... I wonder what she is likely to do 🤔. Principles over feelings!

[@Ethiodawg]

Do it al over again 🤣

[@amandafoster24]

Well your also missing HIS ISSUES as to why he perused a married woman and HIS LACK OF BOUNDARIES.

[@zeal4god402]

@@amandafoster24 He lacked boundaries too for sure. His loneliness clouded his judgment and he didn't draw the proverbial "line in the sand." He ventured on forbidden/dangerous territory. He didn't have a strong enough "no."

[@soleilwhitton6397]

She presented herself as the victim in her marriage and he fell for it.

[@ThomasSDavis-mc9of]

You'll leave them how you found them. He should remember that wisdom.

[@bethtube5997]

Someone else's spouse is never your soul mate.

[@araineacutebrownnurse7315]

If you ever EVER want bad karma , have an affair/ relationship with someone who is married. You will become the Devils playground.

[@ladybluelotus]

Agreed!

[@matinaki1644]

No bad karma for the cheater then. OK.

[@FloydofOz]

This guy is getting a taste of his own medicine.

[@GMAMEC]

He is getting a taste. However, I hate that the kids are involved.

[@tomstulc9143]

An the hoe isn't getting a taste of her satanic medicine???? Who's the one who enticed who. The female went after him.

[@lottielane2486]

​@@GMAMECPeople do all sorts out of emotional need. We all do. Even if we just say ,, Yes,, occasionally, when we really mean No. Just to be liked, or not thought badly of. The caller has just taken this same ,,need,, to another extreme. Such a pity.

[@mrv2308]

He deserves everything and why the dude feels bad for him is beyond me.

[@lottielane2486]

​@@mrv2308Because Dr John has something called. ,Empathy,. Although Dr John recognises what the caller did in the first place was wrong, Dr, John recognises the callers emotional need to love and be loved override the morality of the situation, . We can all identify with that, can't we ?

[@DarknessFalls29]

I'm baffled that he had kids with her knowing her previous relationship was still on the books.

[@Chalk89]

That’s why I have zero sympathy for him. I hate when people make these decisions and say things like, ‘she was my soul mate,’ while following it up with, ‘I had been single for 10-years.’ When you’re a participant in this type of situation, I don’t have sympathy.

[@ember13dp]

Yea. It's not like it was an accident either... they tried 4 times before they had kids.

[@oldgeezer2780]

Multiple miscarriages before a pregnancy takes, still doesn't ask her to divorce, still not married, has ANOTHER child, looking for a *soulmate.* WTH?

[@queenbee3647]

There are people that think kids fix things. The stress of having kids can break you. Unless you are solid having kids will test you.

[@Imissnormal]

Some people just got to make things much more complicated than they need to.

[@BaconMountainMan]

This woman has more red flags than a carnival. 😳

[@ErikaHernandez-df6lh]

😂 IAM just like is she that hot I can't understand how a woman can just keep getting men and having babies and all over again yes I know not the main issue but Iam just like how does one even get so much done

[@RikkiestAndTikkiest]

The attraction makes sense because this guy is acting like he wears a red foam nose and a curly rainbow wig.

[@JJtvee]

🤡

[@b.r.7079]

Funny comment😂

[@mightymouse1005]

Call the united nations.....we found their red flags

[@droptozro]

Don't feel bad for this guy at all. Only feel bad for the kids in a situation they did not ask for.

[@JakeStewart1343]

Those kids are Bass-Turds

[@bovinebeautymoo2884]

Ummmm… You CANT be Fiancée with one of them STILL Married!! 😒😒

[@landonlowe4029]

Lmaooo exactly I'm like what🤣🤣

[@lisaleidy344]

If he asked her to marry him, wouldn’t that be contingent on her getting a divorce? If she wasn’t making any effort to do that, why would he start bringing children into the world with her? Doesn’t make sense.

[@darscassel]

😂😂

[@aioaneirebecca534]

@@lisaleidy344 broken people do weird things.. you never know. Looking from outside, when you are not involved, things are simple. He loved her and he was weak. And sin took its course and things ended just as they should have

[@normantheforeman9866]

Without watching this…that is entirely your fault sir, you shouldn’t be with a married woman

[@bessiebreedlove4888]

Dummy!

[@GameTime-yj6qv]

Not entirely but he does share in the Blame dating a married person is not a recipe for relationship success.

[@ronhall5395]

He already knows that. He wants advice on what to do next for his babies.

[@frumpusnumpus]

This is truly a mess. Imagine how that woman's husband felt the entire time she was shacking up with you and having your kids, with his own son living in your house!! My brain hurts trying to explain the story to myself.

[@aioaneirebecca534]

I have a feeling he didn`t give a rat`s ass :D

[@scratch57]

"everything just happened so fast..." translation: I was super desperate and she was super hot and I couldn't believe it so I didn't question anything.

[@avp6730]

They had multiple miscarriages! And had another kid! How is this "happening so fast "?!

[@sandicook10]

Okay let me get this straight he cheated with a married women now that women has cheated on him and he is upset? Did he care about the married women's husband when he was with her? No sympathy

[@David-wo9un]

It’s almost comical that his voice is breaking up while telling his story; I bet he shed zero tears for her husband.

[@scrolltestimonial]

Best point here

[@terriesmith2616]

Exactly! 💯💯 What goes around comes around. How you get 'em is how you lose 'em. He knew it was wrong but did it anyway. He even admitted it on the call, so what did he expect....a happily ever after with a serial cheater? Now he's stuck with her for life because he has babies with her. Messy messy.

[@sailorsallyrockinrarity2130]

His problem is his own weak boundaries and standards because he doesn't think he deserves anything better. I wouldn't kick someone while they're down like this no matter how stupid their decisions seem in hindsight. People with unmet needs will do literally anything to survive.

[@scrolltestimonial]

@@sailorsallyrockinrarity2130 I see your point and it's important to help an uplift people... But starting a relationship in adultery is probably not very intelligent and those relationships just never seem to work out.. no I've done some not so smart things but getting with someone's wife it's just something that's never crossed my mind as a possibility...

[@misspiscesdreamz]

He messed up by taking someone serious who was already married. She did it to her ex husband so she'll do it again. Let the marriage go! She's for the streets

[@admirallily]

So is he.

[@basednwhitepilld]

I don't understand how John doesn't suggest paternity tests in these situations! Should be #1

[@nt3833]

I get it, but at the same time what you’re saying feels kind of icky. He loves those kids as his own and knows nothing to the contrary. Do a paternity test so can drop them if they aren’t his?

[@ThomasSDavis-mc9of]

In this modern era, paternity is assigned, not established.

[@ricardoiglesias8877]

Doesn’t matter, he loves them kids

[@shrimpsaresearoaches777]

@@nt3833 Uh YES!

[@johniii8147]

I don't think biological paternity tests really matter to him. They are his kids and he's not going to leave them.

[@MiamiChica]

She’s a cheater, he’s a homewrecker. A match made in heaven I guess🤷🏻‍♀️

[@maryannanderson2213]

I'm an old woman and my hearing is not what it used to be so sometimes I miss something that someone is trying to say but if I heard this young man correctly, I wish I could tell him that she never cheated on you at all. She cheated on her husband TWICE, once with you and once with another man. What was that saying that went something like, "If someone shows you what they are, believe them". She has proven, without any doubt, what she is so all you have to do is decide whether you want to live your life with a cheater. I personally would not want to live with a woman who took her wedding vows so lightly that cheating was a way of life with her because I wouldn't want to drive myself crazy every time she left the house wondering where she was and what she was doing and if she had found still another man to cheat with. But, of course, that's just me and like I said, I'm an old woman so maybe I look at cheating a little differently than you young people look at it.

[@marziamartignoni5585]

Ma'm, your comment is the politest ever, and really well written. You really spoke to him from your wise soul.😊

[@Kathy-qu8zj]

No, you are an extremely wise woman. I’m in the situation you described. Cheating husband, but I stayed because I felt I couldn’t support myself and 3 kids, tried myself to get in a position where I could years before because of abuse and control issues. My parents both had died young so I was stuck. Add to theat the psychological and mental abuse that makes you feel stupid and powerless. Now always wondering where/what/who he is doing.. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. Thank God there’s more support for women now than there was when my kids were home. It’s paralyzing.

[@chezshirecat1872]

I became a single parent overnight and the best thing you can do for the children is be there and be the best parent you can be. Mourn the past and build a better future.

[@briannaware1424]

Even though you could tell by Delony's body language in the beginning that he was not thrilled by this dude's situation, especially since he dug this hole himself, I so appreciate that he treated the guy with dignity in his darkest moments when he's crying for help. Good on John. We all need to look at ourselves in the mirror but when we know we've messed up we don't need someone rubbing that in our face.

[@snoozyq9576]

He's good like that. But to be fair if he wasn't he should not do this job

[@Matt-cr4vv]

I appreciate this from John because the reality is the dude made clear mistakes but that doesn’t doom a man for the rest of time. People can make mistakes and learn from them and he clearly realizes this was his fault. Beating him further down accomplishes nothing but a hypothetical moral quandary.

[@foedeer]

You read into that a bit too much

[@karahupp4589]

You are the kindest person in this comment section. You’ve restored my faith in humanity❤ I don’t see how everyone can be so mean.

[@karahupp4589]

@@foedeerno, I don’t think that’s true

[@Tcflohr]

I've been the husband in this situation. And tried to do everything to keep my marriage together and my family together for over 3 years, while she was in a relationship with someone else for more than 4 years. It tore me apart down to every single molecule. I struggled to keep breathing, I struggled to even want to keep breathing. She went through multiple relationships and kept pretending to want a relationship with me. It destroyed me. Do everything for your kids. Don't ever be toxic with them. Learn to be single again. Learn to breathe and focus on yourself and get priorities together. Life, will, get, better. You will get better. I'm now the happiest I've ever been and infinitely stronger than I ever have been. You'll get there too.

[@gtolose]

Not every one gets stronger, some are broke somehow from the divorce, just get weaker each year and finally die broken and sad. Strange u haven't noticed that. it is very common.

[@kcourtney6826]

Good advice

[@johniii8147]

@@gtolose Well as John was saying, you have to put the work into yourself to heal. Those that die broken usually don't make that effort.

[@RachelReaiah]

You put in the work and came out with more awareness, I applaud you

[@gtolose]

@@johniii8147 depends what u got left to build with

[@ChinaConsultingTravelBlog]

Don't be surprised when the married woman you are dating - cheats on you.

[@MichaelJones-rn2pq]

I guess he didn't notice that when he went from being the cheater to the significant other, it opened up the former spot to be filled at a later date. Harsh, but true.

[@randyadams1312]

While he isn’t innocent she sounds like a snake who manipulated and preys on people.

[@maryellendoran8806]

What is it with cheating these days? Yes, there has always been cheating but now it seems that no one has a conscience anymore. So many people use each other.

[@rachelgooden9981]

It’s just more in the open now.

[@maam-yj8ph]

People just want the honeymoon period of a relationship. They don't want to have to do the work when figuring out the difficult parts of being in a relationship or just dealing with one's own personal demons that being in a relationship does not fix.

[@eurekahope5310]

Sadly, it is the cultural degradation of marriage. Instead of the priority being the family, personal happiness is the cultural expectation. Based on rates of depression, it appears chasing happiness is failing while sacrifice, work, and commitment are the difficult, but satisfying, path to contentment and purpose.

[@noregertsyamsayin8011]

30 short years ago you could only meet someone in person and to talk to them you had to have their home phone number. You have the capabilities of talking to millions of people in your pocket in 2022. More people in a day than a lifetime just 30 years ago.

[@strnglhld]

Why do you think ghosting is so popular now? Why is breadcrumbing so popular (sending someone a short message every few days so they don’t forget about you, and denying that you’re losing interest)? Being up front and doing the respectful thing is “too hard” for people now. Disclaimer: If you’re dating someone you suspect to be violent and scary, and there’s more red flags than a CCP Parade 🚩 you can cut them off. This isn’t the majority though.

[@wikiwikiwee1]

If somebody will cheat with you, they will cheat on you

[@ChristopherDonnerArtist]

My mom did this . Totally wrecked my dad. It's been 20+ years he hasn't gotten over it.

[@dogelincoln7167]

That's why she left cuz he wrapped his whole identity around your mom..so she left. And he still not over it 20 years later? Sounds like your mom left a unbalanced person

[@mrv2308]

I wouldn’t talk to my mom if she did. I hope you don’t.

[@Cowgirlkate]

Gosh, is he sure the kids are his? So sad 😞

[@plywood7894]

I noticed a lot of babies look Iike their dads. Maybe it’s obvious

[@yvonnemclaughlin4324]

Get an attorney because she will want the children at any given time.

[@rachelgooden9981]

Or not. She’s living it up! Children get in the way

[@vaska1999]

Get a lawyer because you'll want some child support.

[@kschrop]

She destroyed you and the family and I promise you, she will walk away with everything because she already knows it. Get a lawyer ASAP!

[@nancyblockcolsky1387]

Question: if she’s cheating on him, are they really his biological children? I strongly recommend he has paternity tests done.

[@Life-sk9ec]

Even if the kids are not his, he signed the birth certificate making him obligated to continue be a father to those children.

[@lilolmecj]

He is too fragile, losing those kids will kill him.

[@BhappyD]

@@Life-sk9ec Not true if a paternity test proves otherwise. If there is no paternity test, then yes, he’s those children’s father within the law if he is on the birth certificate, but if there is a court issued paternity test that is carried out and it comes back saying that he is not the father, he is no longer legally obligated to be responsible for those children.

[@Ryan-wx1bi]

​@@BhappyD that's not true. Courts will still consider him the father. Look at the court cases. Even if a guy proves the kids are not biologically his, they will still make him pay child support and consider him the father

[@CarolynnMarkey]

he loves those kids. that would devastate him further.

[@elizabetha8565]

I think this is an important call and there are people that really need to hear this story so they don't live this story men and women. Being alone is far better than going through this.

[@blueravenchick]

I've been through this with my brother, but it seems like the bigger wh*re a woman is, the more a man loves her. Yet, men will mistreat a decent woman. Ugh.

[@betsywoolbright8059]

100%. And the better I treat him, the more horrible he was to me.

[@lyndonbauer1703]

Judge all men by the actions of a few? Can I do that too? Don't confuse a good time for a long time. Women mistreat decent men all the time too.

[@roxanne36565]

Sometimes men think they can “save” them.

[@MirjanaPucarevic]

Preach

[@dogelincoln7167]

Goes both ways..lol.

[@daryltgeorge]

I hate to be that guy but.. play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Getting together with a married woman was a bad decision, compounded by several other bad decisions. Her "cheating" on him was a consequence of his bad decisions

[@LaverneGrant-ff8ub]

You reap what you sow.

[@villesanti1]

The moral of the story is to never date a woman who's already with another man and vice-versa.

[@GrammyAmanda]

I’m so glad this man is owning his bad choices. That takes character and courage. I think he’s going to be a great dad from here on out.

[@MicahMadru]

This isn't a man owning his bad choices....this is a man with a victim complex.

[@staceystrukel1917]

Is he?

[@suade9940]

By listening to the guy you can tell he is genuine and, even though it will be challenging to raise kids alone, he can do it. I wish him the best of luck.

[@suade9940]

Also, he needs to stop blaming her but instead take responsible and own that he is responsible of part of this situation… that way he can move on and move forward.

[@antoinettebashelle7453]

John has so much compassion. I pray one day that I myself will reach such level.

[@eliocosmos]

You can do it. You simply have to choose to be compassionate. It takes consistent work.

[@bovinebeautymoo2884]

Get an Attorney.. YESTERDAY!! Make sure you have documentation of her Abandonment of the kids.

[@manuelestevez3062]

The way something began is often the way it finishes

[@lisabaltzer4190]

That is so true.

[@howlbeast]

Sorry John that’s not love that was lust & poor judgement

[@GameTime-yj6qv]

On the callers part? Lust doesn't last multiple years. It lasts a few months. So he was in love with her. But poor judgment he did have. And yes he was desperate and vulnerable, but that is why you should get help and work on yourself before finding someone.

[@ember13dp]

How you gonna ask another man's wife to marry you? 🤨

[@ithinkigottalent4047]

As the old saying goes, "You lose them the same way you got 'em!" Good luck 🤞

[@peterteixeira2893]

When someone shows you who they are believe them. She's a woman who cheats with co-workers. Get a paternity test. With any luck they are not your$

[@alladreamwedreamed]

Wouldn't be surprised if some of those miscarriages were just lies to get him more attached to her via trauma

[@cathy7824]

He went after a married woman, he got exactly what he deserved. I feel for the children, adults should be charged criminally for doing this to the children.

[@Chalk89]

I cannot help but laugh at this. People want to pretend that a cheater was only such because you were so special that they made a decision they’d never make again. You made your bed, Michael.

[@littlemissy8356]

you've never made mistakes?????? Give him a break.

[@LisaLisaCJ]

@@littlemissy8356 cheating is not a mistake . It’s a selfish and intentional choice. He can save his tears. And he has kids with someone’s wife. He is a 🤡

[@Chalk89]

@@littlemissy8356 I've made millions - just not the type to make them and then play the victim.

[@snoozyq9576]

Agreed. It's just like that meme where the guy sticks a branch through own bicycle wheel and then falls over

[@blacksquid270]

​@@littlemissy8356 Mistakes? He knowingly pursued a married woman, he created this situation for himself and deserves what he gets.

[@HighHorsepower220]

Karma's a biatch. You earned it. Having an Affair with a Co-worker you know is married. Then she does the same to you. Duh! He claims he did everything to be perfect. Yeah, right. Hope it hurts.

[@Lala89856]

It breaks my heart to hear this man break down. Gosh, I know that feeling and it sucks to feel that way. I wish him the best and I hope he finds happiness one day.

[@jilljohnson251]

Also, John handled this call expertly (as always). He didn't wag his finger or condescend to the caller at all. He met him where he was and showed sensitivity and empathy toward this dear man. At the same time he managed to pinpoint the most critical issues, offer realistic next steps, and throw in a little humor, too. Dr. Delony, thank you for using your gifts to make a difference to those that are struggling and hurting.

[@angelafair6492]

Yes, held him accountable without shaming! I agree.

[@kimberlygonzalez3384]

Bro 🤦🏽‍♀️, a part of me doesn't feel bad but a part of me does cuz you can tell he's upset and heartbroken. One thing I can say is that at least he takes accountability and says I pursued her while she was still married. She on the other hand is a lost cause.

[@EckerKyle]

Some of these callers deserve their problems

[@mlokole254]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@GameTime-yj6qv]

I wouldn't say deserve, but choices do have consequences.

[@amyitis]

It is deserved, it's karma. You receive the type of energy you give out to the world

[@Chele-nm4qx]

I always find it funny how it was okay for him to fool around with another mans wife, but when she does it to him- KARMA!!!

[@vaska1999]

That's called schadenfreude. Or malicious enjoyment of another's sorrow or embarrassment or failure of some kind.

[@bradleysherman3103]

Johns ability to keep a straight face at 1:30 is legendary.

[@alladreamwedreamed]

Such a range of faces in the first 2 minutes

[@martell8560]

Wait she's still married? This is a whole circus.

[@sueblack5794]

...and now cheating with another guy.

[@vaska1999]

Yeah, a circus is exactly right. It's very unusual for a woman who is a mother of such young children to cheat. His (ex)partner has serious personal issues that translate into serial cheating. The lady's bad news for men.

[@AllynHin]

When will people learn that anyone that will cheat *with* you is not going to have a problem cheating *on* you.

[@omayrasdemesne]

This guy sounds like such a nice person. I really hope he sticks with the 1:1 therapy and lawyer.

[@Price8903]

It’s never good to get with someone who’s already proven to be a liar, by being involved with someone other than their spouse. If the marriage is that bad get a divorce.

[@bradleymaravalli2851]

Michael, props to you for having such a great understanding of your situation and the awareness you have. You 1,000% deserve more than this!!! Someone will love you for who you are.

[@sarahshanahan2222]

We are all such broken souls... you never know the pain inside. I wish all the commenters on here were kind like John is. People come onto the show and become vulnerable with the chance to have their story aired on the global stage. He admits the mistakes. Please don't throw stones

[@charlotteboyett-napper4780]

Truth

[@michaelwilson145777]

All they do is throw stones. It speaks volumes about their character.

[@sarahshanahan2222]

@@michaelwilson145777 not everyone. But the caller sounds like he wants to be a good dad

[@michaelwilson145777]

@@sarahshanahan2222 the caller is me. And I am definitely going to be the greatest Dad I can be. It's my only focus

[@colmwhateveryoulike3240]

Yep!

[@seanporter6431]

What a foolish man, u hooked up with a married woman who never got divorced from her first husband. She cheated on you like she cheated on her first husband. This is karma

[@avi4875]

Not what he wants to hear but "What goes around, comes around." While alot of people would say he looked for it, and I don't disagree, I hope he's able to pull himself together atleast for his kids. He's done things but so has everyone. He's trying to be better.

[@Dhuxul9]

the kids probably aren't even his 😂 KARMA

[@christinebutler7630]

Whose kids? Those last two are not his.

[@michaelwilson145777]

Too bad they look just like me. I love it when people run their mouth and don't have a clue

[@lachanna100]

“Tomorrow starts TODAY.” -Dr. John ❤ this

[@dianebalch5369]

I saw this trait with all of my cousins. They all dated the good-looking, funny and clever men. All were divorced. Don't look for players, witty and gorgeous. Look instead for kind, considerate, other-centered and thoughtful people. And definitely not just for the bedroom.

[@findingnory]

He started this off by basically saying this was the worst call John's ever had. Dude, this is nothing compared to some crazy amounts of abuse I've heard on this channel. No one is abusing you here. In fact, you basically started all this. Did you sleep with a married coworker? How did you marry a married woman and why did you gloss over this absurd fact? Why does none of this matter to you? But now you think you're a victim because she "cheated" on you? I believe this man is just peddling for our sympathy as a means to cover up a multitude of sin. No, man. Your tears aren't enough to cover this up.

[@maxrobins4282]

Yeah, this guy has serious underlying issues.

[@sophiawish9772]

Follow the Lord. Don't engage in adultery. Ask Him for help.

[@benjamina.serrano8948]

Couldn't agree more. He chose her. Most likely led by lust, and belived her victimized BS. Knowing she was still a married woman. Adultery. All the way. Stupidity on his part.

[@sophiawish9772]

Yes. That's why God gave us rules, to keep us happy and safe. Marriage mirrors our union with Him. You don't violate that union.

[@Randiii3]

That’s truly on period. Follow God. Only.

[@meancarleen]

Imagine this; a cheater....that cheats! MIND BLOWN!!!🥴

[@Carnivorepothead]

His dad left him when he was a child and he’ll never do that to his kids?? It was okay for him to get a mom to leave her family though 🤔

[@skaterman8180]

Sin causes awful things like this

[@marawood3801]

Now, he knows how her husband felt when she cheated on him. Too bad he has to go through this. He definitely learned his lesson. Some mistakes can be avoided but we consciously choose to make them😢

[@queentemitayo]

How do you buy a house, move in with her, and have two kids without insisting she get divorced from the husband?

[@probablynot1368]

Michael, the childrens’ mother let them down. It’s up to you to be the best dad for these kids AND to make better choices for yourself. You’ve got this!

[@DarthBalsamic]

Out of the gate he made a fatal error by even entertaining this romantic relationship. Frankly, he made a previous error by being a confidant for her ongoing failed marriage. As men, and women especially, we must be very careful being that shoulder women lean on because both can catch feelings. I don't even believe in entertaining a convo with a woman who has marital woes unless it's fully for counseling purposes to fix the marriage with the husband she's with so long as there is no abuse of any kind. Be objective and keep your emotions out of it as a man. This man got too involved. I have seen this up close talking to women who had failing relationships who during the course of talking to me sometimes caught feelings, and/or wanted me to be some sort of white knight against the dude that they chose and failed with. In the end, don't get into a relationship with people who are currently in failing relationships, or have a history of failed relationships. Those usually end up in a loss for both parties involved. Exercise prudence.

[@terriesmith2616]

You said it better it I ever could! This caller knew it was wrong going in yet he disregard his own gut instinct and just went with his emotions, putting his logic on the back burner and now years later he's paying for it. His life is a mess. And he brought kids into this mess. He should've lead with his logic instead of his emotions. Now he's stuck with this dead beat woman for life because they have kids together.

[@margie909]

Michael, everyone has a mess. Everyone. She loved you as much as she is able to love someone. Your responsibility is to your children now and show them a different level of love and grace. Don't focus on what she is capable or not capable of doing. Your focus is YOU now. Be a hero to your babies, never try to save a woman again.

[@michaelwilson145777]

Agreed

[@margie909]

@@michaelwilson145777 good luck with everything!!!

[@starlingswallow]

Michael, I'm praying for you ♥️🙏🏻 You sound like a wonderful person who's made some mistakes and is sifting through some hard consequences due to past decisions. You can do this. Be the BEST dad for those kids you can be! Love them with all your heart. Focus on healing whatever it is that's broken in *you* that even lets you be _attracted_ to other women who are also broken ♥️ best blessings to you man.

[@angeronalove5799]

What a compassionate and lovely comment. I feel the same for this man.

[@lilarose9348]

This man got caught up with love and feeling special. He made mistakes but I think he’s a great dad who will give these kids a happy and stable life. Hope he stops berating and guilting himself. Praying he gets the support he needs and deserves.

[@ashleyb1091]

One word…KARMA, I wouldn’t be dating someone and proceed with someone that was still married. Why is THIS guy suprised? Come on really dude.

[@rory644]

Complete simp.....

[@Marco-fn6kg]

love the way John helped this guy caring but straight realistic. Respect

[@sueblack5794]

Handled really well. The guy did what he did, no reason to beat him up over it. He knows he was an idiot and sounds like he has accepted he made a mistake.

[@lindyloowho7]

She can't be your fiance if she is married! Dont walk away, RUN!

[@jikan-tabi-1888]

A mess in the beginning, middle and end! 🤦🏼

[@moshfreak900]

As soon as he said that he lives in Portland, Oregon i knew it was gonna be a train wreck!!

[@danilaroche1156]

Train wrecks everywhere, booboo. That was a funny comment though!

[@devadii24]

Woke weirdo town 😂

[@rainspirit3973]

John spends his energy on healing the human that reaches out in pain. 🙏🏼 The caller is making the effort and he guides them to look at themself first. Square one can be VERY hard to find.

[@kristic4472]

sorry dude, but now you know how her husband felt/feels. but you Do matter, there is nothing wrong with you, except maybe poor judgement. You are the World to those babies, hug them tight and fight for them. You can do it, and you are worth loving and being loved by someone who Can love. Good luck, God bless. God loves you.

[@michaelwilson145777]

Thank you for that

[@rebeccaoprea9917]

What goes around , comes around . You reap what you sow . If you engage in the act , you are not the victim , but accomplice to the crime . Lesson learned .

[@willarmendariz7663]

Dude she did not love you. She used you! Just like she used her husband. You don't treat people like that that you love. You're a resource to her. You should be thankful you never legally married her.

[@sueblack5794]

She is now swinging on the next branch. She will end up breaking them all .

[@observant3309]

I only feel sorry for the children. I am certain none of them are biologically his. My parents were cheaters like this- ruined peoples lives. I disowned them and they do not know my kids. Yes, you have harmed them. Do better now and earn their respect. I wish you well.

[@michaelwilson145777]

They are my kids

[@amylin5062]

Emotionally, psychologically, in every way that matters - they are your kids. I gently advise you, however, to get a paternity test done. Not to torture yourself or because you’d throw the kids out (you’d never do that) but do it for THEIR sakes. So that in the future if they do have different DNA they will know. For medical reasons, if for nothing else. Also, since they are so young now, if they’re aren’t yours biologically, you’re in a much better position to explain it to them later when they are old enough, as opposed to them getting a horrible shock in their teens/adulthood. Hopefully they are yours by blood. In terms of loving them, they are your kids and that’s the most important thing. Best wishes to you, and I hope you have a good life going forward.

[@Peerless569]

@@amylin5062 What would be the point of that though? If, as you mentioned, they’re already they’re emotionally and psychologically his… what would be the point? What medical reason? Have you ever needed your DNA checked for a medical reasons?

[@AndreOliveira-cu3fy]

John I love the honesty you had here in stating there are many episodes that haven't aired because 1) you didn't do a good job or 2) the topics were too heavy. A man who takes accountability is a man I highly respect. Kudos!

[@ladypink3473]

I’ve been in this man’s shoes. In the sense that I was pure, I gave this relationship 100%, it didn’t work out, I ignored all the red flags in the beginning of the relationship. I also had a kid with this person and I beat myself up bc I felt bad for my child that I put in the middle of this situation when I knew I should have walked away a long time ago. Take care of those kids, develop new boundaries and don’t let those boundaries down. Have and accept support from family/friends. Good Luck!!

[@sunyu2016]

I’ve said this a million times and I’ll say it again: things that start messy usually end messy.

[@earthling1984]

Why would anything think it's a good idea to date a married person...

[@mogetit5999]

All of you feel bad for this guy?! He helped her commit adultery and he coveted another man’s wife. He got what he deserved, it’s called karma/consequences. As the old folks used to say “ you lose them how to get them”. 🤷🏾‍♀️He needs therapy to learn his worth and get some self esteem to get a woman that doesn’t belong to another… in my humble opinion

[@janelleg597]

So you think you're justified in looking down your nose at this guy with such an arrogant attitude? You sound like a Pharisee. He is reaping what he has sown. Sympathy doesn't mean behavior is excused

[@mogetit5999]

@@janelleg597 what an angel you are. There are people like you that give grace to fools and people like me that keep it real. When we address the root cause of issues, only then we can heal and correct. Stay blessed!

[@lisabaltzer4190]

He needs to get right with God.

[@mogetit5999]

@@lisabaltzer4190 absolutely!!!!🎯

[@RandomRamirez]

Red flag since the beginning! Sounds like he’s having a hard time but he needs to stop simpin and ditch her and move on.

[@Private.eye.007]

This is a great example of how *low self-esteem* is not a victimless crime. You end up victimizing yourself over and over because you don't think you're worth better than the situations you put yourself in when you have low self-esteem.

[@warrensloan3467]

One thing that’s overdue is for him to stop taking all of the blame and send some of it her way. He has said multiple times in this call that it’s all his fault and he screwed things up, and that is a remarkable exaggeration.

[@amde8554]

No but it sounds like he’s an empath and she took advantage of him, he needs therapy so he doesn’t repeat a cycle like this

[@razmiddle9410]

All you can control is your own actions. Only the weak spend time blaming others -- others might have done wrong, but that's irrelevant when it comes to actually solving or avoiding the problem for you.

[@warrensloan3467]

@@razmiddle9410 Ignoring the faults in others I would argue is what created this problem. It would be foolish to waste the rest of his life being bitter, but not acknowledging reality is not the solution.

[@mollyg4980]

@@amde8554 100000% this

[@katcraig7525]

She sounds like a narc. That's what they do. They project their guilt on their partner.

[@amylin5062]

I would love to talk to this woman’s husband. I assume they’re still married, since Michael never said she got a divorce. Like…at this point the husband’s got to know about all this. Obviously they haven’t lived together for years. Is he okay with his kid (is her oldest actually his?) growing up in this chaotic situation? Does he just not care that his wife’s doing her own thing, having kids with someone else, and they’re STILL married? This doesn’t make sense to me. 99 times out of 100 the divorce would’ve been finalized years ago, especially since they haven’t been living together. Unless. She keeps going back to husband just enough to make HIM think she’s still around. After all, they’re still married. Ugh, I have a headache now. This woman shouldn’t be with anyone except a therapist.