Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Episode 13 ROAST & RECAP | JAX ATTACK |

[@JustSimplyNatN]

Does anyone else think that Schwartz had no intention of moving in with Sandoval but just brought it up to Ariana hoping to rile her up? He actually said ‘This was the exact opposite reaction I was expecting’ I feel like it may have been intentional and good on her for reacting the way she did and not giving them the satisfaction of blowing up so they can use it as another example of her being unreasonable!

[@arievena19744]

One of the red flags regarding Tom was when he bulldozed his way into Ariana 's first cocktail 🍸🍹 book, then delayed working on it cuz his project was more important. Plus, love the evolution of James Kennedy! Who would have thunk it?

[@chilledjuice]

I remember being like wtf when I watched that episode years ago. It was her own thing and he forced himself into it claiming mixology was his thing

[@Chili1976]

😂 between the “Lala” the Brock and Brittany impressions i could watch a whole show of just that

[@michellesykes9010]

Your Brittany accent is the funniest damn thing. Gets me every time!

[@Codenameisjane]

I am dying over the Brittany of it all!😂

[@Lindsay21]

Thank you so much Joleen! I am a new listener to the show and love getting female takes. I am sick of the successful women hate from other creators!! Like we’ve come so far, but we really haven’t? 🤷‍♀️

[@JoleenLunzer]

Thank you Lindsay! So glad you’re here 💕💕

[@energywellness8834]

Kristen said on her last podcast that Craig only lasted four days being Sandoval‘s assistant😝😝😝

[@nichole6093]

Sorry I missed most of this! Long time lurker, but finally got in on chat the other day. Very much appreciate your interactions with chat, your gratitude, your perspective, your quick wit and your consistency ❤

[@JoleenLunzer]

Thank you for your kind words ♥️♥️ So glad you are a part of the chat! :)

[@nichole6093]

@@JoleenLunzer all true! I’ve got lots of commentary on the live, but the (most obscure) sincerest one is THANK YOU for mentioning Kate Nash. I’ve been trying to remember a very specific song for a few weeks now and my previous google search for “popular late 2000s British female artists” wasn’t very successful. 😂 Anyways, finally scratched that itch!

[@gigisielaff]

pass joleen along to your crew! she is free comedic mental health!

[@JoleenLunzer]

@@gigisielaff thank you Gigi 🥰😘

[@windbrook10]

Daniel should have one of those buzzers in his hand when he shakes hands with Sandybutt

[@dantecox820]

You can tell and Brittany’s heart of heart when she’s next to Lala in the aftershow she does not agree or believe any of it, and the fact that she scared to stand up is why I don’t like her

[@shanijames29]

I totally understood how James was feeling. Good news is Ally shared on WWHL that Hippie & Mr. Banks now sleep together & now and they all cuddle in the bed together ☺❤

[@unmuzzled7795]

Joleen - you are truly a national treasure. You remind me so much of an old friend who is wildly witty, and like you, whenever she gets a roll, leaves me involuntarily at rapt attention and regularly giggling at such unusual word play. Keep going, girl. You are blossoming :D

[@JoleenLunzer]

Thank you! ☺️

[@cherylwilson4507]

Do you remember the furst episode of the season Lala was on her sofa talking to her mom and she brought up then that she cant understand how Ariana can have a boyfriend in 10 days after the scandavol she sounded very envious. And have you noticed that Lala seems to have a problem with keeping a man

[@WhatdidtheCountessdo]

She dated Randall the entirety of her time on the show until season 10, and she has a toddler. I think she was selfproducing, and being snarky, but I doubt it. I don't think she has tried to "keep a man".

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

Yeah I can't believe that on blah blah' s second date and a BJ with no neck Randall she got an R- Rover !

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

​@@WhatdidtheCountessdoabsolutely 💯, talk about moving fast in 10 days as pertaining to Ariana, she doesn't look at how fast she moves on a married man , got a house build, got engaged, had a baby . All in one season !

[@tapuworld]

I'm on the verge of not watching this show anymore - the "bro's" good edits have broken me and the internalized misogyny w/bLa bLa, Lisa, and Shay ... I just dont have the acceptance and paitience for this..I've always thought Andy Cohen had a crush on Sandivol...I'lll still listen to your recaps tho, your the best!

[@dc03506]

Omg his “fall” was the worst ever and then he flopped around like a dying carp 😂 like bro 🫣

[@VMH-03]

Both my husband and I got out of serious relationships, his was 4 years and mine was three years. I was broken up for about a month and he was broken up about 2 weeks. We've celebrated our 22nd wedding anniversary recently

[@JoleenLunzer]

That’s amazing! Happy anniversary! ♥️

[@melescotson6445]

Love your shows. You're so funny😅😅❤❤

[@JoleenLunzer]

Thank you! 😊 ♥️

[@gabbygalarneau553]

I laughed SO hard when they cut to Schwartz telling Jax about Sandoval wanting him to move in and it said “ 2 minutes earlier “

[@panayiota4904]

I think that Brittany staying with Jax and eventually marrying him is screaming misogyny. She believes that Jax's bad behaviour was not his responsibility, it was the women he was with just incapable of keeping him in line and preventing him from cheating on them. She thought that she was different, therefore Jax would behave differently with her. More fool her I say. I highly doubt that anything has changed, it won't be long until she moves back in with him after he gets bored of his sex spree and wants some beer cheese.

[@karamia517]

Brittany looks like a parade float..I cant look anymore! Thanks for the roast 😂

[@steff8345]

Be objective guys! Katie looks amazing! ❤ Shes smart and hot and being a star this whole season! 🌟

[@panayiota4904]

Omg, I can already see Scumdoval ranting about Daniel to Schwartz: ''Dude, like, he doesn't even wear nail polish, dude! Like, are his blouses even from Zara Women, dude? Like, dude!''

[@sandyshows8040]

Nail polish not hot

[@panayiota4904]

​@@sandyshows8040Especially on Scumdoval. It makes him look even more disgusting.

[@Sunshine134_]

Jax is worse than ever because now his stupidness affects a wife and child.

[@patclark2398]

You are so right about Tom trying to control Ariana and the narrative. Do you think Tom has a thing for his new assistant?

[@DAnastasia_]

So good…. Too good 😂

[@WeggieQueen2005]

I willed that fall!!! lol

[@Leahmckee92]

Brock’s accent😂

[@JamieRohanna-wo6yx]

I USED to love LaLa but her behavior this season seems confusing, petty & jealous! Just curious as to why she would get emotional NOW after selling her soul and betraying her girls all season?!! I wish her the best with her pregnancy & family BUT I DON’T FEEL SORRY FOR HER! LaLa made her bed now she needs to buck up and deal with the consequences!

[@WeggieQueen2005]

Jax and Tom are vile misogynists. So dangerous. So happy Ariana is away from him. Happy Katie left and it's not too long before Brit leaves. So dangerous.

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

Yes absolutely 💯 the 2 Tom's and stupid Jax all come from the same School of liars and cheaters club.

[@TravelSeets]

Lala still stands by everything she said she said she has no regrets, she didn’t really apologize at all or recognize anything

[@Leahmckee92]

Hi Joleen! I’m late to this as well. This is my first comment on KZbin and I just want to say you crack me up over vpr. I’ve watched every season from the day it came out and I love how you speak truth for the women with a comedic twist. You brighten my day watching your recaps 😊

[@Leahmckee92]

Also I’m not a Bieber fan that’s how old my Gmail username is 😂

[@JoleenLunzer]

I love it! Lol Thank you for your kind words ♥️

[@energywellness8834]

Look how polite Ariana was to Tom’s assistant as well, that is just her energy. She’s very genuine and likable, unlike the other women on that show right now. Plus, we see how worried Ariana is about Scheana in this last episode, I only wish Scheana would have done the same for Ariana this season, but she was too self-absorbed and up La Blahs booty!!

[@ronesss33]

I actually think the fall was real as he was in the middle of making his point and he would never want to be interrupted doing that 🤨

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

It was Karma, for talking negativity about Ariana that he fell flat !

[@SkarGig]

So funny that this season ended up being James' redemption arc and not Tom or Tom or Jax's. Also Katie's hair is perfect and the Katie haters are spooky. She obviously hates Jax and doesn't like Brit enough to make it worth hanging out with them, and so made an excuse because Jax wanted a specific reason.

[@WeggieQueen2005]

You nailed it. They are suffering right now and they're jealous. But they will get through whatever is hurting them and come out on the other side. BUT...stop throwing your friends under the bus.

[@WeggieQueen2005]

PS Katie IS a girl's girl. I thought Lala was but I see her now.

[@sharonbackos4975]

Joleen, you are so rational!! I agree with everything you say!!

[@_Jael]

7:49 the platform in his shoe was too high that’s how he fell over😂🤣 1:03:04 has to be the most CORNY scene on reality tv history 🌽🌽🌽🌽, like what are they 15 borrowing there dads car😂

[@ronesss33]

Every Aussie kid had a budgie growing up (along with a gold fish lol) 🤭

[@AlyVee33]

Thank you for being understanding of Scheana. I had my first baby in 2022 and postpartum was such a wild ride. I already deal with anxiety on a daily basis, but being postpartum I was diagnosed postpartum ocd. It was not fun, and my brain did and make me feel and think things, it was so scary not feeling in control of your brain. I’m so he grateful I don’t feel that way anymore but I totally understand and relate to Scheana. Also, the medication making her sleepy is totally a side effect of the medication. Mine do also and that’s why I take them at night. 💜

[@gigisielaff]

the brock/sheana parenting convo did not go as i assumed from last weeks preview. i actually felt for brock. i saw true regret and real tears. he did not get defensive and i felt he was reliving his bad decisions and the pain of fawking up as a dad.

[@deniseswett1418]

After this episode I don’t ever want to see Sandoval or Jax again. Vomit. I do not understand what Ariana and Brittany ever saw in these men.

[@marisaemilie999]

Yassss!!! Katie is definitely Daria, Ariana is Jane, Scheana is 100% Quinn and Lala is Sandi (Quinn’s friend who is always competing to be the most popular girl)… For a bonus round Sandoval is Kevin and Schwartz is Daria’s dad

[@JoleenLunzer]

🙌🏻🙌🏻😂😂

[@jessicajoyner6446]

More chamomile treats for the Producer 😽

[@JoleenLunzer]

Thank you so much!! ☺️

[@jenifersantinole]

Ugh I missed the live! In Phoenix not used to the time change but thank you for giving me something to do!!

[@michellesykes9010]

Man, I missed it! Replay crew tonight!

[@CarlarinaHowat-LittleMissCurly]

😂😂😂😂 I do love you womon 😂❤

[@jennjohnson4067]

I miss watching live. But I still get to watch so. You are smacking me this morning with the funny, the brilliant, the facts and the gossip all in one stream episode. You should be on tv!! But technically ya are!! On mine, anyway. I never reported mine because I knew it would be a litany of questions about what I wore why was I in a club how much had I drank (was sober) and the whole rest of the blame game. They never ask “ why did you keep it so clean” when a car gets stolen. But I am appreciative of you spittin facts about real shit, all while cmtfu!!

[@teresatyhurst5569]

why is Jax always profusely sweating?

[@iamheatheranne]

He likes the "pasta"

[@marisaemilie999]

In the immortal words of Rick James “it’s a hell of a drug”

[@shanijames29]

😆

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

Yeah I noticed that too, it is because he's on some mushrooms 🍄 or something !

[@OliveCandy38]

As Joleen says, he likes the nose candy!

[@RealiTEAwithKristaMarie]

Listening now and love it

[@lisawolstenholme4944]

I've not watched this season can't bear it lol

[@natashareese6854]

IMO their Spice Girls group should be: Baby - Ali Geri - Ariana Posh - Katie Scary - Scheana Sporty - LaLa It was hard to decide between LaLa and Scheana. But since LaLa has a better singing voice and Scheana has better stage presence... that's how I decided between those two.

[@ramirezluz50]

Jumping out of the car like they are in their 20s. OMG, it's not fun, it is funny because the look ridiculous. They truly think they are cool. OMG.

[@leahbeahh]

As a veterinarian I was really upset seeing everyone downplay James emotions around wanting to stay with Hippie I hate when people pull the “my human baby is more important than your dog” type of energy. I was actually impressed with how seriously James is taking his commitment to Hippie and loved seeing him cry and stand up for himself on this issue because I absolutely agree fuck the wedding Ally can go alone he should stay home with hippie given his biting history and chaotic last few months he can’t risk him biting a strange pet sitter because it could literally end in Hippie being euthanized. Why is this so hard for people to understand? This is why I prefer animals lmao (I’m also a fellow Aquarius like Joleen and James so maybe there’s a correlation there haha)

[@BonnieP08]

I had the EXACT same thought. Hippie had a bad reputation so you wouldn't leave him alone with just any dog sitter. It would have to be someone he knows and trusts and is trained to deal with his issues.

[@laurapotpie]

Isn't Ally almost 30? She's 29? Why does everyone talk about her like she's 18?!

[@Aspin-uk8vf]

Tom would rely on Ariana to make ends meet.

[@dc03506]

Brock back Brock😂😂🤣🤣😂😂 omfg I’m dead

[@jessicajoyner6446]

Still cracking up over “Producer” Tilly 😂 Thought about it, and she is indeed off camera calling the shots. Just not how I initially imagined 😻

[@juliehulce8383]

Uncles are great. Not a replacement for a father.Agree 100 about Katie

[@nicolewhite1288]

Brock has jumped the shark 🌊🎿🦈👍

[@dc03506]

42:22 omg that’s so funny you bring up Brittany’s advice because sure I legit paused the show at work and went and gossiped with my girlfriend about how shitty that advice was, “like you’ll figure it out”

[@emilymandziara3921]

His one daughter’s name is Winter Sky….like really Brock and Scheana. You’re going to name your daughter Summer Moon. I feel like it’s a slap in the face to his other baby mama and kid. So gross.

[@Amsie3]

That IS weird....

[@cherylwilson4507]

One of the Philadelphia Eagles players played rugby now hes in the NFL

[@karamia517]

I can't watch this show..what is the point? I'll just watch recaps. Thanks for covering it

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

I love Katie, I love her dress style too ! She should have a fashion clothing line one day ! I would buy it !

[@karamia517]

Missed it again! Brock seems very restless..he gonna bail on Scheana soon. He's looking for another way out

[@patclark2398]

Between Sheana and her mother, Brock doesn’t have any say over how his child is being raised.

[@knockknock16]

Brock talked in more detail about the situation with his kids on Scheananigans. He always cries. I really think he feels deeply about it all. There's a lot about it is left unsaid, I feel, partly out of respect to the mother of the kids and their family, and partly because of his own self-imposed penance. The child support is up to date. The only hindrance left is the mother authorizing that Brock can have more access to them. Recently there has been baby steps of connection. Like sending him photos etc. I assume all this and more is going to be brought up at the reunion., though I don't think he would want to risk the little progress he's made so far. I hope there's a path toward full resolution soon for the sake of all his kids. The parents need to get it together.

[@violetv3958]

Thank you for rescuing your animals!!

[@JoleenLunzer]

Always!! 😘😘

[@patclark2398]

You can’t get close enough to Britney to hug her. 🎈🎈

[@shanijames29]

omg yes, please stop trying to make the toms a cool thing this season. eeew the car scene was such puke

[@patclark2398]

The car scene was boring and weird. OMG, the ugly hair and clothing was too much.

[@AMYV3]

100%. No owing of child support That’s a big NO. Oh Jolleen I’m the same way. I’m so bad now I’m single now for the first time since I was a teen. Two over ten year relationships. When I think about dating and I hear of him not seeing his kids etc. I GO OFF!! Lol. Like I’m MEAN !! There are soooooo many men who have hit their ex doesn’t see their child or pay child support etc. so many. It’s GROSSSSS So I judge Block HARD!! Lol I honestly think this whole season with Scheana is about trying to fix Brocks reputation and her upset (jealous, let’s be real) that it’s not all about her, and the Ariana thing. I mean last season was her wedding even though they probably married during covid to keep him in the country and of course Scheana would keep it secret so people wouldn’t downplay this second wedding. And then there’s needing a storyline. 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

[@JoleenLunzer]

They did actually get married a year before their wedding that aired last year.

[@kelseygulledge6893]

Tom really just needs to embrace Cameo to help his financial situation. He could make more doing that than going on tour.

[@LL-cc4ro]

Hopefully Brittany can move on. It’s getting harder to feel bad for her.

[@davemcleod2151]

it’s been said that Brocks ex has been with another man for 10+ years that the kids regard as their dad and they don’t want a relationship with Brock.

[@candifardoe6124]

American football was born from rugby. The running joke is that football was born when lawyers got involved in rugby 😅. In order to score in rugby, you have to touch the ball down in the end zone. The total score for the TD and the PAT is 7 is a version of the rugby scoring. In rugby a TD is called a try and is worth 5 points and the kick after is worth 2. The terms like scrum and maul that you here from commentators of many sports also comes from rugby.

[@SandraCorchia]

My dad had to be taken to court to pay child support.

[@patclark2398]

Unfortunately, that happens way too much. 😥

[@angelachristian87]

Omg I totally missed him falling off the chair… I tend to skip scenes with him and his bros unless James is present.

[@jonsarnat]

I also cannot get behind the love for Brock. Charged with DV and abandoned his children. Sorry no bueno

[@heidiwaddell5721]

If Scheanna had gotten rid if her camera crew that follows her everywhere like she's a A list star, she wouldn't have needed to cry to Sandival anout money..he o ly gave her money to buy a friendship , his usual

[@laurapotpie]

Hang it up - flat screen - Barbies love it!

[@doloresbriseno2567]

Yes, "allegedly" punch Sandoval. We as viewers will say we saw nothing.

[@Bunny-dj2ky]

Different take on Ali & James’ situation. In this economy, weddings are rare, at least in my community of friends, & if my bff was having a wedding I would make an effort to be there. There are options of James staying home with Hippea (since he is James’ dog, not Ali) or bringing the doggo with them. After exhausting all options, I would then opt to stay home with my furbabies. I understand where Ali is coming from, so just giving you all a different perspective.

[@ashleyswaney1029]

I miss Katie’s long hair. With the triple barrel waves.

[@michellesykes9010]

Brittany chose to be with Jax. She has to have some nasty in her.

[@patclark2398]

She does. She’s a Sandy Hook denier and a racist.

[@michellesykes9010]

We always called speedos Weenie bikinis.

[@Animalsrights816]

Screw your ex! Like I said just because she checks the box vegan doesn’t mean she’s got the right mindset but not all vegans would do that ❤❤screw her and him

[@Aspin-uk8vf]

Brock looks like Bulto....

[@Aspin-uk8vf]

I hope you are wrong regarding .Vanderpump; if you are correct they need to change the name. Vanderpump will be placed in the ICU if Ariana leaves. LaLa is over done, and over rated. Tom cheater and the other Tom cheater needs to leave the show, or should they be called dumb and dumber.

[@emilyaichele9527]

❤

[@patclark2398]

Schwartz and Ariana make up should have been filmed. Why didn’t we see that?

[@gwhiz5313]

The only reason Schwartz gf may b ok is bc he's been less twitchy since they've been together. He was borderline hot on wwhl without all the slouching and Schwartz-isms

[@Sunshine134_]

Tom’s tattoo does not look like their dogs. One of them is white and both of those look brown. 😂😂😂

[@gwhiz5313]

Brock is attractive when u don't know his VPR character... bc he comes off as a douche. He may be lovely irl 🤷‍♀️

[@Cubby-cv8qe]

I'm with u Joleen re: Brittany....nice nasty...& her look/apparent health concerns r alarming. Her face is so swollen & I hope she is ok. Or maybe she had 2 many procedures??? Her clothes r 2 small 4 her & not flattering. Does she not watch herself back??? She knew who she was marrying. Just take care of Cruz. Thanks 4 ur recaps. U r hilarious & your cat/producer is darling.

[@ireneserrano-s5u]

Brokeback Brock needs to mind his family's issues of Australia instead of trying to instigate communication starters on Katie's and Ariana's life ! Sorry I don't like this guy 🤨

[@pamnorris8954]

Aren’t you doing The Valley recaps? So much better than VPR.

[@gwhiz5313]

Idk I get the feeling Ariana and Dan have run their course. Her last interview about him didn't sound good

[@tjgossiplover]

We're not getting Katie her personal life etcc. Superficial hmmm ? Not sharing héself

[@patclark2398]

Production is giving Katie bad edits.

[@leigharmstrong9940]

I want you to be my neighbor SO BAD! I’d bring you coffee & snacks everyday, just to be able to chat with you.👏🏼💪🏼🫶🏼