Karen Fails To Force Her Son Into D&D Game || D&D Story

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[@DoctorLazers]

This might be the only CritCrab story where the orgy havers are the protagonists.

[@NobodySoldier]

Oh no, you reminded me of that DM and his god-like NPCs' orgies on a -spaceship- ... EDIT: An airship.

[@smugscylla4481]

Even weirder it seems the majority of the table was female

[@westcoastgeeks7294]

Did we really need 7 mins of explaining his group like to role play there sexual fantasies. Of course this nerd is 6 ft tall and not intimidated by people. We didn't need all that BS fluff.

[@Nildread]

@@smugscylla4481 or atleast half when their full group is together.

[@DoctorLazers]

@@NobodySoldier It was an airship, but yes.

[@dcbandit]

Yay, my suggestion for a little crab assistant got implemented!

[@CritCrab]

You made Crab Kingdom history

[@dcbandit]

@@CritCrab Awesome!🦀

[@alsorensen2484]

Just wait, soon they will be unionizing

[@NHH009]

A lot of people did appreciate more crabs, I forget which video had 3 entire crabs but it was unforgettable.

[@pyrosianheir]

@@tobiasp.3702 Or CritCrab will do as his name says, and roll a nat 20 on the persuasion check to avoid execution, and then another to get himself elected Crab President. :D Alternately, he nat 1s and doesn't even make it to trial.

[@MetaWarlord135]

This has to be one of the most depressing stories you've covered, not because of the horror itself, but because of how it ended. At least with the vast majority of other stories, there's some sort of happy ending, even if it's as simple as "the problem player was kicked out" or "the players left the awful campaign". Here, however, this can't be classed as anything other than a complete downer ending - the players and GM were forced to stop their campaign right as it was about to reach its conclusion, the Karen and the store owner got exactly what they wanted with zero repercussions and the neuroatypical kid was still stuck in an unhealthy situation.

[@haku8135]

Maybe the DM got to sleep with the girls that showed up? It's something at least.

[@azadalamiq]

@@haku8135 doubt it story doesn't add up. 1) claims to be regulars yet doesn't know the ownership changed hands. 2) the store not changing after changing hands. 3) use of buzz words when talking a decade old story. 4) claims no one can host dnd at their homes but op can get a 3some in his bedroom, that largely doesn't add up.

[@ExValeFor]

@@azadalamiq feeling kind of similar. The whole story smells a bit rank, starting at how they just feel the need to qualify the time period as if to prove that they were totally there at the time, to how our protagonist is some amorphous non-white all-inclusive chad martyr running a super duper cool quirky evil campaign. I've a feeling this story did happen, but some of this shit smells like a dead rat. I'm gonna have to assume the karen, her kid and the store owner are caricatures at best

[@joshuareynolds23]

Thing is this smacks of modern d&d. Nobody I know from when I started playing would turn a player away. I come from an age where finding players was a near impossibility.

[@haku8135]

@@joshuareynolds23 impossibility? They were a small group of friends that had an established game going. Why would they bring in new people, let alone strangers, LET ALONE children?

[@curvilinearcube8716]

Out of everybody here i feel worst for the little kid, his moms a jerk, and he just really wanted to try a new game and his Mom ruined that for him

[@zodiachimera7557]

Yeah it wasn't his fault any of this happened... Why was she trying to put him at the corner table anyway? Maybe I'm reading too hard into it, but it almost comes across like she's ashamed or trying to hide him away from the rest of the event.

[@unluckyone1655]

The kid probably sat at the corner table because he felt too awkward and nervous at the other tables, because people on the spectrum often have a hard time in new social situations, and probably had no idea the table was claimed. That poor kid, poor OP, and what a horrible mother, it's just a shitty situation all around

[@Jermbot15]

@@zodiachimera7557 The kid probably picked that table because he felt most comfortable at the only table in the store that was majority female.

[@albertnorman4136]

Sounds like the kid was used to letting his mom bully for him.

[@pariahzero]

@@Jermbot15 The description also said that the women were "in the corner" - which would probably make the child's back towards the rest of the store, making the room seem "smaller" with fewer people to see & get anxious over - his mom obviously would "protect" him from behind.

[@dortiz2009]

Lmao I grew up in the ghetto, you randomly grab someones arm and dammit karen you getting smacked tf up, especially with this lady's attitude

[@dementededge3266]

I grew up a stones throw outside of Detroit and yea, you're not wrong.

[@fslayer1290]

Truth!

[@rodjacksonx]

She certainly deserved it. Unfortunately, while it might have taught her a lesson, it would have just added more trauma for her poor kid.

[@Kronosfobi]

@@rodjacksonx I dont think kid cared slightest. Dude mentioned, despite the Karen screaming like a dying T-rex from Jurassic Park, Kid had the same expression and attidute through all of this.

[@rodjacksonx]

@@Kronosfobi - Well, yes... while visibly shaking. I just assumed the kid was on the spectrum or some such.

[@tarrker]

The "Do this or you're fired!" thing is equal parts hilarious and horrifying. Hilarious because every time I've heard that it was someone literally saying that they'd get me fired from my own business. Horrifying because of the sheer confidence behind the statement every time I've heard it. As if these people have actually gotten someone fired before and knew that they could do it again. x_x

[@krispalermo8133]

I love the look on their faces when you tell them if they come back you have them arrested for trespassing.

[@drfrankendoodle]

this story gives me mad r/ThatHappened vibes. The bit about showing the karen his acceptance letter is what pushed it over the edge for me. I'm sure some version of this happened, but it seems a bit unbelievable as described. Like even someone who knows nothing about DnD knows what "I dont work here" and "this is a private game" means. But maybe im just a cynical asshole and it happened exactly like OP says.

[@thirdprince4028]

That's fair, but I've had an experience with people getting upset at me when I was younger when they've mistaken me for a store employee, I tried to explain I can't help because I don't work there and don't know how to help, and they've gotten really pissy with me and... I don't even know, assumed I was lying or something? People are wild.

[@littlemoth4956]

You underestimate the brain damage of the average American consumer.

[@abderianagelast7868]

Remember that OP was going to surprise the players with their going to college. The acceptance letter is one such way to surprise the players. This is perhaps the only scenario I can imagine where it would actually make less sense for OP to not have the letter.

[@GarkKahn]

I'm really cynical but also i know some people with negative iq so my opinion is op exaggerated some details but it happened

[@Nineball2501]

>Squeaktoy noises >Dog runs up to laptop and proceeds tilting head back and forth >___>;;

[@mistressofdreams6031]

HAHAHA

[@brieb402]

This is the first story in a while that genuinely ticked me off. Sucks they got away with that and probably still think they were in the right.

[@811brian]

Let’s go find the place and show them what assholes they really are!

[@stevenschnepp576]

You say that like they weren't. OP ran an X-rated game in a public place with kids running about. The store manager was right to kick him.

[@higueraft571]

@@stevenschnepp576 A PRIVATE game, with an entirely different system, off in the corner away from pretty much everyone... Between a set four-person group.

[@Dragonmoon98]

Worse still, they were just about to end their campaign in what could've been a spectacle. But no, the campaign probably still rests in campaign limbo, where all the characters of every unfinished campaign wander, alone and afraid, until they are chosen to be taken up, a fate which sadly only a few are fortunate to receive. Worse still, the likely neurodivergent kid was there to see the entire scene. That would surely be traumatizing, and quite likely left him at least a little disturbed.

[@Dragonmoon98]

@@811brian Apparently, the place closed down already.

[@SirMorganD]

"Now, lets strat the horror story" Oh, the orgie part wasnt the horror History!?

[@TheToonpimp]

Knowing that crabs eat their young, I fear for Shell.

[@stillpixel9233]

The squeaking from "shell" made my dogs lose it lol. They are currently on the hunt for a toy that isn't real

[@The_mekboy_you_deserve]

Man, I feel so sad for that DM, this story couldn't end in any worse way, especially for the fact that the new manager was an idiot whom didn't even play that sort of game. I hope the world will punish her as deemed

[@maestroicarodecarvalho3947]

Probably the new owner will soon discover tabletops are not so profitable, and as someone with no connection to the games at all, will probably lose a bunch of clients. Sad part is the store probably will fall with him...

[@The_mekboy_you_deserve]

@@maestroicarodecarvalho3947 the store probably already fell, if I'm not an idiot it's a story of about 10 years ago

[@MidoriMushrooms]

I feel bad for the kid.

[@maestroicarodecarvalho3947]

@@The_mekboy_you_deserve i didnt get that.

[@stevenschnepp576]

@@The_mekboy_you_deserve While we can't rule out your being an idiot, the DM did say it happened some ten years ago.

[@absolutelydemonic]

The amount of people who s**ualy assult both PCs and NPCs in TRPGs truly should make you conserned-

[@Kairos_Akuma]

If every player is fine with it - it's fine lol. You can't dictate how others play and if everyone is on the same boat why be concerned

[@Thoron_of_Neto]

Yeah... weird how "rape is never okay" comments seem to be like an oasis in the desert when the protagonist of the story of the day is the one doing it...

[@EldritchMcPie]

@@Kairos_Akuma I consider there to be a definite difference between "I can't dictate it" and "It's fine". When I'm at a big family gathering and my folks leave the table, it's not "fine" that they start to discuss how only white people are truly German, how you gotta have understanding for Nazis, how human rights activits have gone too far by changing the name of their favourite candy... but I can't dictate them to talk about something else, only observe that they are horrid people.

[@filipferencak2717]

@@EldritchMcPie There is nothing wrong with simulating rape, or any other fcked up fetish, if literarly everybody there is okay with it and wants to do it. That being said, the OP clearly wasn't on board, so this is still pretty fcked up.

[@filipferencak2717]

@@EldritchMcPie It's not the same as being a literal nazi 🤣

[@amazinghayes1]

In fear of sounding like a boomer, they were essentially loitering and playing verbal pornography in broad daylight during a new game release date.

[@digital_u4ia]

I mean, it sounds like the story is set in a store that wasn't all that popular, only being busy on that day BECAUSE of the new release. So on any other day, they'd be happy to just have people in the store enjoying the games that were probably bought FROM the store.

[@CatacombD]

Most game stores allow people to reserve tables in order to run private games. The idea is that, just like with card games, if you provide a space for people to play, they're more likely to buy stuff from your store and, even if they don't, having an active store attracts more customers. In fact, every MtG launch event I've attended has had at least one private dnd game running in the other room while the launch event filled the tables in the main room. It's a sign of a healthy store. It sounds like there was a miscommunication, where either the old owner didn't make the new owner aware of pre-existing reservations, or maybe the group just assumed that their old recurring reservation was still good. I'm assuming the former, because, from the sounds of it, the new owner didn't even have a DM lined up to run that table; He just mistakenly assumed that anyone running dnd at the store worked for him. If he did have someone lined up to run at every table, then they wouldn't have been able to plop down and claim the table. Some employee would've gone to setup there, or already been setup there when they arrived. As for whether or not the group should be covering sex acts with their roleplay, well, again, it was a private game, and they claimed an isolated table, so no one has to listen to them who would be uncomfortable with their actions. Also we don't actually know how explicit they were being. If it was just, "We bang everyone in the camp, and then get ready to disembowl some orcs!" then fine. If it was, "And then he slides his hot, glistening member inside her tight....." etc etc, then, sure, that's not appropriate for a public location.

[@amazinghayes1]

Ah so I am being a boomer lol. Fair enough folks.

[@Mokiefraggle]

@@CatacombD I think it was equal parts miscommunication and also the group having always laid claim to the one table that wouldn't be used for a big Adventure League-style group for an event. OP calls it out as being trashy, starting to come apart in places, and with barely enough room to seat the four of them (with basically no leg room, implying that it was narrow *and* short), in comparison to the larger, nicer tables that occupied the majority of the gaming floor. It's why their group always used it: because nobody else really wanted to grab it. And at the 4e launch event, most people would either be people who'd played 3.5e, and were coming to sample the new game, or newbies coming to sample the new game, who would probably be able to tell that the books on OP's table weren't the new ones, since 3.5e and 4e books are super-different at a glance. So they again would've been ignored as "not what we're doing today," by anyone except this possibly neurodivergent kid who just saw an open seat at the table, and his Karen mother who didn't know what any of this was really about anyway.

[@safetzukic7445]

:...Or you're Fired!" "Okay where's my final paycheck?" Might as well get paid for your trouble.

[@briangiese2628]

The story is odd. I find it difficult to believe the new manager was trying to fire a DM running a private game. Also hard to believe people are playing R rated games at local game store. Especially when playing in an open area.

[@Thoron_of_Neto]

Yeah, the requirement of believing the store owner/manager couldn't comprehend a private game, and "I don't work here, strains my credulity to maximum level

[@CarburetorThompson]

All lgs i’ve been to have employee numbers you can count on one hand, hard to believe an owner wouldn’t recognize one of their own.

[@Chris-jk6wd]

The guy explained it he was actually a new owner and took over a business he had no idea what it really entails.

[@CarburetorThompson]

@@Chris-jk6wd Even new owners know all their employees that's kind of a day 1 one thing

[@Chris-jk6wd]

​@@CarburetorThompson Every new owners are expected to have names but that doesn't mean they got a chance to meet everyone in person yet. We don't live in a age where every owner/manager are competent in their roles.

[@flugal_rere]

"We can't play at our houses for various reasons." "The girls stay the night at my house in my room." Make it make sense

[@Draeckon]

Or you could use your brain. There could just not be enough space in his room for a game, or not enough privacy. OP mentioned they're loud and swear a lot, so his family could take issue with that if they overheard them.

[@Thoron_of_Neto]

@@Draeckon right... but a game store manager is gonna be totally cool with customers acting out rape scenes in the corner loudly, with plenty of swear words...?

[@Mokiefraggle]

@@Thoron_of_Neto I've seen worse and stranger at a game store. I mean, most FLGS I've been in hosted CCG tournaments on the regular, never mind D&D, and were usually full of people playing Magic or whatever. Those get majorly foul, often as full of cussing and threats of rape and violence as your average FPS deathmatch game, and the shop owners routinely turned a blind eye. Also, when I hear OP saying his group got pretty loud, I presume it's more in the way of several teenagers talking to and over each other, and getting progressively louder, not that their RP was necessarily loud for the sake of being loud. Not all teenagers are good at volume control, or at waiting for a moment to speak, after all.

[@shane3696]

Why wouldn't the new owner have meet with the staff beforehand and know that the DM wasn't an employee? Either way the kid having to be forced through such a distressing situation due to his mom is such a bummer and hopefully they're doing well now.

[@razoredraven2966]

gonna be honest this sounds a lot like r/thathappened, with the OP having a group of friends since kindergarten that they knew in a biblically. Along with a game shop that allowed them to have a R rated campaign is frankly unlikely as is was the Chad New owner. this story seems completely made up

[@Kennisaurus]

I think what makes this sound super fake to me isn't that the Chad owner didn't know how DnD works but that this guy would automatically align with one non-paying customer versus three paying ones. Like even if he thought op was an employee that's still two paying customers that he kicked out for nothing.

[@Pnut557]

This is definitely made up

[@RhiannonSmudge]

whoever drew that chart at the end, major props, it looks damn good

[@thesquishydea]

THANK YOU SO MUCH AHHH

[@tiazoh]

Really like the compass idea! So happy to see you growing. I empathize with the mother, who probably has to fight to make sure her kid is included in activities, but at the same time I can't understand people fighting so hard for something when they're so clearly in the wrong.

[@jakedoesyoutube]

I have a few ideas & tips on how to avoid any future events like this/ actions that could have been taken to avoid the outcome that happened. If someone takes a seat at your table uninvited and unwanted, tell them that "that seat is taken, John just went to use the bathroom" or a similar line. Filling any empty seats up with bags also helps. If you are ever in a situation where a karen or kyle trys to force themselves/ their kids into something, assert yourself. Speak up, tell them that they can't force you to do anything and that they should mind their own darn business.

[@myautobiographyafanfic1413]

"I don't even think you're a real Dungeon Master" is great.

[@argelion2793]

What makes a real dungeon master? That's the question my next sage is gonna be asking if I ever stop being a forever dm

[@orngenblak4296]

And then everyone clapped

[@MasterFlotolk]

I gotta put a big X to doubt for this story. And even if true, who plays R games in public?

[@higueraft571]

Evidently, MANY people. Because controlling the volume when people are nearby is a thing... And of course not seating next to the nearest family.

[@MatsThyWit]

Wait a minute... they couldn't play at anybody's place for one reason or another so they were forced to play at the store...but they ended up staying in OP's room and talking all night long. Soooo...why couldn't they have been running their game there? they had all of their stuff.

[@v1de0gamr23]

Because this completely fabricated story needed an antagonist.

[@chocolategravy0111]

This was an Interesting story. But honestly things feel too convenient to be true. Maybe parts are. But a lot of it feels exaggerated or made up.

[@AuntLoopy123]

That new owner who doesn't even know who works for him and who rents from him will not be in business for long. At least, I hope not. What an awful business owner. He "fired" his customers, because another customer (and he, himself) flatly refused to listen and tried to get her son into THAT PARTICULAR TABLE, where the adults were going to play an adult game, with sex, swearing, and rock and roll, and an end-game session, at that.

[@nbr6116]

Oh my God, Shell is adorable!

[@MidoriMushrooms]

everyone send shell a dorrito chip ;_;

[@supercasualgamer513]

Why’d you do that to my dog, bro? Lmao Gilgamesh is NOT fond if your antics 😂 🐶

[@euchiron]

Weapons-grade Karen and Chad shenanigans ... the kid is definitely going to need therapy for something

[@linda-0587]

😍 *Grabs and hugs tiny crabbies!!* Love you Critty!!

[@FingerSpazm]

Everything else from this story aside I find it absolutely wild that OP didn't tell his literal closest friends he was moving. That's so shitty. I mean he realized how shitty that was luckily but thats insane. I don't understand how you can just NOT tell your closest friends that you're moving.

[@hiiamsnek6789]

I don’t even play D&D, I just like hearing the stories. Spent the past couple of months binging these videos; definitely great storytelling and commentary. 😊

[@theogreenaway7401]

Something about me thinking I'm at the beach is so nice love the background

[@Rainart520]

Yeah, I don’t trust anyone who thinks that r/pe is good for character. You did a great job on this story Crit, but I don’t trust OP

[@EldritchMcPie]

Agreed. I consider it a general big NO, but this story was icky in particular because the table was actively involving dismissed consent into their played out fantasies.

[@EldritchMcPie]

@@tw7369 I oddly enough find myself able to both care about actual victims *and* problematic behaviour that fetishizes sexual assault.

[@ArmoredChocoboLPs]

Well they were “evil” Which is as much a BS excuse as being murderhobos.

[@EldritchMcPie]

@Gray El entrenador Pokémon Domination Kink does *not* equal r*pe and it's so very far beyond "ok".

[@flask223]

Yeah

[@claytonkane3813]

At much as Karen is the villain here, what kinda party DOES that, makes it a ritual thing, and does so out in the open in a game store? They must have been rather secluded from the rest of the store if that was never overheard from the other patrons there. The players and DM are kinda wack.

[@Thoron_of_Neto]

I used to play Table Top war games, in a small ish store, and it was usually a pretty good time. When I first started, I was only there occasionally, but after about 6 months, I was there nearly every day. When you come and go daily, you see stuff you don't normally see of you stop in for a bit every week or so. The guy that worked there when I started was awesome. Old school army vet who was more a go with the flow type. Later the owner hired an assistant manager, because WFB and W40k had become pretty popular, and the tables which were usually empty, were suddenly always full, and manager couldn't keep up, as they were always called to be the officiate if an argument over rules broke out. Assistant manager was an air force vet, and he was one of those guys that was a heavy duty player. At first this was a good thing, but later he became more hostile toward new players, and this caused all that business to dry up (think, 8th edition WFB releasing just a little before 5th Edition 40k, so both systems had people clamoring to play the new rules.) The whole point of this story, all the back story is to say that during Assistant managers reign, the only people that were ever in the store,, were "those guys" who always made me feel weird about playing the game. Eventually Manager left, and Assistant manager got fired because of the lack of play. They hired a new manager, and she pretty much threw those guys out on their asses, several of them receiving permanent bans, because while old Managers rule was "no cursing, this is a family store" everything else was fair game (think, ogling girls because they don't come in often, dirty talk,, discussions of sexual conquests, real or imaginary.) She cut them off cold turkey, gave them two strikes, to adjust to being normal human beings, and then dropped the ban hammer like Mjolnir at a rave. Tl;Dr sometimes those players get a pass because they're regulars, then new management comes in and gives them a swift kick back to reality, and I'd bet money that's what happened here.

[@Cyberpsychos_Dirge]

Yeah hAving a rated R game with , as OP admitted, rape and orgies in a public setting is really strange. My group of friends and I are very close with the store owners at our hang out, but we keep everything to a minimum until it’s after hours or until it’s basically empty. Why? Cause it’s common courtesy

[@brun0caesar391]

well, people who spend much time with teenagers get used by the huge load of obscenity they joke about. And its not something exclusive from rpg

[@thejkittymews9045]

You realize the OP explained the reason for both the ritual and why they play DND in the corner of the store instead of someone else's house right? Literally both of these things were explained in the video. The ritual was because after the first time they did it everyone rolled stupidly well like "that shouldn't be POSSIBLE" levels of well. You've heard of (American)football players with weird rituals they start before an important football game right? Why the hell can't AD&D players do the same? Also they played the game in the back of the store, one table all by itself. Blocked off by a weird wall according to the OP. So basically they were as isolated as they possibly could. Finally, at the end of his post he also explained *why* they weren't usually able to RP at one another's houses. As a final note: I'd be more freaked out trying to RP orgies where my parents could overhear rather than in a public place where complete strangers that I will probably never meet again or ever know on a personal level could overhear but, that's just me maybe I'm the weird one.

[@rodroinrainbows9929]

I PUT THE PERRITA IN HER PLACE. Soy español, no latinoamericano, y aún así es el mejor insulto dedicado a una Karen que jamás he visto.

[@norielsylvire4097]

Que coño significa eso macho?

[@NanoMan737400]

La forma bilingüe de decirlo le agrega ese toque extra * chef's kiss *

[@norielsylvire4097]

@@NanoMan737400 pongo la perrita en su lugar? Lo siento, has de saber que tengo retraso mental severo y además vivo bajo una piedra así que no me entero de los eventos importantes, vamos que no lo entiendo porque soy tonto siento las molestias

[@espio87]

@@norielsylvire4097 "Bitch" se traduce como perra.

[@MsLucho1998]

En serio? Es bastante malo la verdad

[@ankokuraven]

the little crabs on the compass are so cute!!!!

[@balazsszucs7055]

I always find these kinds of stories fascinating. Like how can a person this dumb walk and breathe at the same time? And whom did they convince to have chilren with them?

[@digital_u4ia]

Someone who jumped ship shortly after realizing they'd be obligated to spend the rest of their life with the person. (I was raised by a single mom, so this is kinda self deprecating.) ...still funny tho!

[@ricklawrence2515]

I love how the "bad ending" to this situation is him ending up spending the night with two girls who are evidently dtf

[@nix6940]

The meat of the story was good, and it's a shame that they had to go through that, but holy crap was it long winded and full of extraneous information. Story starts at about 5:00.

[@mrarroyo1990]

Worst part was the kid. I feel so bad for him having to sit there and watch his mom freak out.

[@JesseL018]

Not gonna lie I was sort of hoping karen was going to either realize she was wrong or otherwise get put in her place but it sort of sounds like she got her way. her kid didn't get to play at that table sure but I'm sure the manager shoe horned him into another table after ejecting loyal customers.

[@firstwaddledee9182]

7:33 the kid just stared at my … WITH HIS DOLL-LIKE EYES AND SAYS NOTHING

[@v1de0gamr23]

I'll take "Sh*t That Never Happened" for $200!

[@calvinabels4910]

😂 when shell came on and started squeaking my dog heard it and tried to find the squak toy in my tablet

[@russc3537]

adorable little crab is adorable.

[@sealessseadog2735]

Well said...

[@nutmegdoesstuff1339]

"I want to speak to your manager." "Okay, in that case what you're gonna want to do is head back to the main road, go for about half a mile, turn left, then turn right, you'll find my manager in the building on the right."

[@stevenschnepp576]

Huh. OP graduated the year I went on my first deployment. Obama's election worked out better for some than for others.

[@nellowethereal6633]

The mom probably thought the kid was being discriminated against. (Wrongfully so) and decide to be racist as a response. Then another guy fires somebody who doesn't even work for him.

[@tsubakiofmelancholy6297]

*feeds shell and takes good care of the smol crab*

[@reylamb6552]

aw that poor kid was so scared

[@Detroitus]

That was the most fictional story I've heard in a while.

[@bradleyballinger2027]

Should have just ran the campaign right when she complained. I have a super karen aunt who told us we had to let her kid watch sausage party because it was a cartoon. After 20 seconds of trying to explain it, I just told her fine and watched the movie with my friends. I'm not a kids parent, I did my part and informed her.

[@Donkeyearsa]

That could be quite devastating for the kid. All he wanted to do was to play the game and the adults all around where acting out like children.

[@DeaconBirbSpy]

honestly i love shell. so cute. such crab.

[@vahnvega1990]

The COMPASS OF JUDGEMENT is a neat idea.

[@ghostkirby1255]

I wonder if the store is still open to this day with Chad at its head. I’m very curious after this burst how many of the people never went back after or even quit

[@CthulhuOnCam]

"Spent the evening in my room with the girls" doesn't sound like it ended that bad....

[@lerminator101]

We just had pizza and talked. None of us were in the mood after that.

[@CthulhuOnCam]

@@lerminator101 I mean that still sounds pretty nice...

[@biggumstevens1784]

the girls being what he calls left hand and right hand.

[@xryeau_1760]

Ew..?

[@Ben-zr4ho]

"Not a real Dungeon Master." She thinks its a job title...

[@sharkdentures3247]

It is SO true. It is VERY tragic when an excellent, long running campaign doesn't get a proper ending! And, like favorite TV shows getting cancelled prematurely, before a Finale, it is sadly VERY commonplace. And seriously Critcrab, poor little Shell looks so scrawny, give him a hamburger or something!

[@zacharyscovel1017]

That Karen likely lost custody of her kid.

[@DarkWolf22K]

ಠωಠ Baby Crab (soft shelled)... Send Him Back To The Dungeons (& Dragons) To Collect More Stories From Trapped Souls

[@Nocturius_Fi-Core]

I LOVE the compass of jugement!

[@stevenharper7118]

The kid was probably shaking because they was embarrassed by their Karen mom.

[@leejoyner4532]

Reminds me of when I saw a basketball bounce out of an arcade machine and I picked it up as it barely rolled into a kid, who didn't even seem to notice. I threw it back in the machine for the guy playing and thought nothing of it. 5 minutes later this lady is yelling at me for "hitting her kid" and gets the cops involved. I tell the cops what happened and tell them to check the camera footage, as it appeared the area had a camera over it. The cops let me go and I went back to playing games. For the next 3 hour, any time I looked back towards the ticket booth, that lady was standing there, forcing her kids and husband to just stand there, staring at me. I felt really bad for the kids, they didn't give a fuck about me or the ball, and I could tell by looking at them this wasn't anything new for them.

[@partypants5629]

What is gained when we turn to CritCrab? Nothing but Reddit Gold And the story mines

[@Tytoalba777]

17:53 Appreciate I do. If I were to make a suggestion, the Compass of Judgement feels weird to me. If I were to change it, make it instead of having Horror be the bottom right corner, make it be the -Y axis (sorry that I'm bringing up memories of Algebra). Glory is +Y, Funny is +X, Cringe is -X. So this story would be deep into -Y, slightly +X. Something that's neither cringe nor funny would X neutral, and something that's neither glory nor horror would be Y neutral.

[@thesquishydea]

I mistakenly made the quadrants the labels instead of the axis, should be fixed for next video

[@Tytoalba777]

@@thesquishydea Cool, thanks!

[@shinobi-no-bueno]

This is a great example of a story that never happened

[@jigglezeus]

this is the one time where I wish I could teleport to this moment in time and back-up this dude lol

[@personificat25_61]

I love the changes!!!! Wish I could give more support! :D

[@carpedm6195]

File this one under "Never Happened".

[@wolfhound146]

On the disorder part if that was the case I can totally relate. Sometimes I stare at people and not even realize it. I could be doing it with my eyes being centered on them and I could be thinking about a video game. I could be thinking about a video about animals I saw. Then I break back to reality and realize that I have been gazing down a poor person and avert my eyes. It's not something I do to be malicious or creepy. It's just something that happens. It's more for me a factor of where my eyes last were. Sometimes on a rare occasion I'm told I'm tracking someone. It's close to the effect of sleep walking. I just don't realize that I do it. There will obviously be people who think otherwise but they can think what they want. It's not true at the end of the day and they don't know me.

[@VelociraptorsOfSkyrim]

Maybe it's just me looking too deeply into it, but there was something that I couldn't help but notice. OP said that the players and themselves were really close and they tended to treat each other's characters like they would treat each other. He then later mentioned that the characters would Have orgies before big battles. Is there something we'd like to know, OP? Did some players have the hots for someone else at the table?

[@Ben-zr4ho]

One shit part about being around the age of 18 is that some adults treat you like the worse combinations of child and adult. They expect you to carry the responsibilities of adulthood without any of the privileges. You get treated like a dumb child brat / grown dangerous felon that is still expected to do important stuff and do it right. Plus some people think they can boss you around because you are a kid but they can also yell and curse at you and treat like shit in ways they never would to an actual child. Being 18 in high school is also a trip. "Why weren't you at school yesterday?" "Doctors appointment." "Well I need a note from a parent." I can vote, go to prsion forever, be executed, be drafted and sent to war but I need a note from my mommy? I just started telling them I was 18 and lived alone. Basically... "Hey let me know if you find my mom. She kicked me out on my 18th birthday and moved to Tahiti." Not true but I had a friend whos parents disowned him when he came out at 14 and he ended up getting emancipated and moving to California alone when he was like 16. He had fun with that type of stuff. "Hey if you get a note from either of my parents let me know first but its highly unlikely as I am dead to them for being an evil, hell bound f*a." He actually didnt get a college grant once because they kept asking him for proof of his parents income. "Im 23. Been emancipated for almost ten years. Havent seen my parents since. What does it matter how much money they make?" Under such rules you are usually considered under your parents monetary unbrella until you are 26 I think. I ran into similar problems. Which is insane. Bill Gates doesnt have to give his kids a nickel when they turn 18.

[@ptronohv.5284]

I really want to know what the fate of that store was if the owner wasnt even aware of dnd culture and also respected Karen's. I can only hope it's under better management now.

[@higueraft571]

evidently, it's a store for farming supplies now.

[@zippityzoop1478]

yesss he did the crab servant idea!!!

[@donwanna3906]

Wait, Crit Crab-Karen crossover? Love it!

[@stephen623]

To know someone in the biblical sense means to....you know......smash

[@lerminator101]

Yes, that is accurate. Things happen in small towns.

[@Rebecca-yf9ci]

lol I love the compass of judgement :)

[@Borzogo]

I appreciate the extra elbow grease. Cool improvements, Mr. Crab =D

[@someghosthunter]

"GET BACK TO THE STORY MINE!" "Bewwewwwwwwwww!"

[@ohadhabrnash334]

...wheres my car that makes that noize?

[@orpheonkatakrosmortarchoft4332]

Seems like it's easy to fool people with obvious fakes on that subreddit.

[@SapphWolf]

Oh, yeah, don't see that store lasting very long. The last thing most gamers want to deal with is a total "dude bro" when all they want to do is get their nerd on. I especially don't see that store lasting very long when dude doesn't even seem to know who does and doesn't work for him.

[@Gio98art]

I have had run ins with store owners like this. It's not uncommon for business owners that buy up a business to not have a clue what they're getting into. They just see money or only loosely care about one specific element of the hobby and not any others. I was quick to dismiss the store owner as a dumbass. But I would have called management to begin with. This literally could have been prevented if OP had just included management in his plans. If management knows you are running a game, and can explain it to them during a time there isn't an event going on, they most likely will listen and tell you yes or no. If you just talk to management and come to an agreement you're literally untouchable. Even if they are out of the D&D loop, asking for a table, maybe paying a little money for it if needed would easily net you a table.

[@jeremiahlewis410]

Now back to the story mines! And yeah, games that die suddenly like that... every single one I've played in.

[@ZantariEXE]

But poor Shell, feed him! He needs food!

[@this.is.a.username]

DM Should've happily taken the kid and turned the BBEG into a clone of his mom.

[@rockdalianninja1056]

Keep up the good work crab man

[@JewelWildmoon]

Can I give Shell some of my burrito? 😆

[@l3esme568]

I will stand for this clear crabbo abuse!! Relent this foul act

[@Randomkitty74]

Hey uh Critcrab? That baby crab okay? He looked kinda hungry...

[@wiwuno]

Wow that mom Karen sure was crabby. Guess you have to expect Shellfish people everywhere, but you cant let yourself get salty about it. Either move and and play or scuttle the plan and do something else. Sorry the puns were building up i couldnt resist.

[@Punmaster9001]

I would have told that karen off, like swore in her damn face and make her blush with all the obscenities I'd throw at her

[@KraftyMattKraft]

The real Nightmare to this story is how long it went on. It felt like getting to the meat of the story with the Karen and Store Manager Chad took way too long with a lot of fluff that could have been summed up with, "My friends and I like to play a more mature DnD game that we hold at the local game store. Anyway, this one time the store had an open event to promote 4E's release at the same time we had our private 3.5E game going. This kid sits down..."

[@zakrizahar526]

10/10 story it rare when I hear a story that makes me want to fight someone nothing on this planet is more annoying to me then and incorrect person ignorantly asserting that they are in the right

[@metarmored]

Love The Compass! Looks dope