Lawyers, when did you Realize "My Client is a MONSTER"? - Reddit Podcast

[@bork6996]

ok when you said “thats when the stories get bad” i was like “nah bro i can handle anything” and when i saw the story of someone giving their dog a cat as a “chewing toy” my stomach dropped

[@melissaharris3890]

I can take (some) stories of child abuse. When it comes to animals, it's a no

[@platypuspersonnel476]

Completely the same. Cat story just made me lose my stomach, and as I own cats, I just can’t imagine it

[@bork6996]

@@platypuspersonnel476 i also have a cat used to have 2 but one ran away bc he was traumatized by his previous owners and less fear-resistant than the other cat, and there WAS a hostile cat in our neighborhood. he’s now living in another village peacefully, with no owner but people often see him healthy. neither me nor my family have seen him in 2 months bc we cant find him

[@bleflar9183]

I decided to stop watching the video after the point where "things start to get really bad" and started scrolling down to see some comments. Big mistake.

[@keepdancingmaria]

I had a friend, who lived on their SO's family's property (not inside the same house, but very much controlled like that). One story that came my way from my friend is a situation where they (the family of the SO, not my friend) threw a cat in with their penned up, abused, dogs. This was for entertainment value, watching this cat get torn apart, by dogs. (I need to emphasize, I don't blame the abused dogs) I tried so hard to convince my friend to get out, even to the point where I cited this example of things not being "right" on this farm. She went so far as to try to involve me in family stuff, trying to "normalize" stuff for her. I refused to join in. My friend was extremely hard working and financially worked her butt off to improve their farm. I allowed her to take rocks off of my farm in order to save her home from flooding. I didn't charge for my raw materials. She destroyed her VW Bug trying to carry rocks to improve land that the "in-laws" refused to put into her name or reimburse her efforts for. She and her SO (son of this abusive family who also abused her btw) ended up moving across the country after the parents totally and completely shafted her when selling the property (yes, I tried to warn her about all the money she was pouring into the property, improving it) and we lost contact. Sorry if this is TMI. Your comment about dog and cat resurrected this whole thing for me, the first time hearing about a cat being used as an entertainment thing. Laura, if you are still out there. Families like this are sick in the head. PLEASE ESCAPE from your SO!!!!!

[@sally8708]

I think criminal defense is a very complicated moral position. Ultimately, more people/victims get justice if the system doesn’t collapse. Without criminal defense lawyers protecting the constitutional rights of monsters, the entire thing would collapse. I’d imagine it’s just as difficult as taking the Hippocratic oath and having to save said monsters when they get shanked in prison.

[@Ariel_thenotsolittlemermaid]

100%

[@alastairatcheson1407]

In the situation of doctor to them, ignorance would be bliss.

[@davidhowell1415]

The moral implications are the exact reason I didn’t go into law school.

[@plantdaddy999]

This is why I will never take a job that forces you to combat your own moral compass. It takes away from people more than they know

[@lydiapetra1211]

@@plantdaddy999 true....humans are so evil!!

[@dillyx8]

Story 20 gives me the shivers. Man blinking with most of his face chewed of by his owned dogs. Pure torture

[@nsasurveillencenode95b83]

the internet was crazy in the early 2000s man. wild stuff like that happens all the time.

[@mauricebenink]

He probably had very severe brain damage. The man was already gone just all the passive brain functions continued. But the bash from the metal bat already made him brain dead. Still horrifying. But its good to know he didnt suffer

[@RabblesTheBinx]

​@@mauricebeninkdon't forget: the neighbors heard hoarse screaming, that's why they called the cops. Dude wasn't just alive, he was conscious and could feel pain. He just couldn't move.

[@mindmaster323]

When I was in 9th grade my homeroom teacher taught 12th grade government. We'd come in and see some of the topics they were talking about still on the board. Some of us would ask him about the lessons and he'd tell us. During one of these he mentioned he used to be a defense lawyer before being a teacher. We asked him about it and he said he quit because he didn't like having to defend people who admitted to him they were guilty and just as well didn't want to put an innocent behind bars as a prosecutor. He ended up becoming a teacher because the stress of the job got to him and he didn't want to work in the field anymore.

[@ethicalbugboi]

Not a lawyer, but Big Jack Horner, he's an irredeemable monster!

[@boisegameshowguy]

Jiminy Crickets! 🦗

[@konradrzeniecki5209]

Are you a death fairy?

[@snadres3596]

What took ya so long?, idiot * yeet*

[@amylee7457]

please 😭

[@shpoinkervr]

trying so hard not to scream in anger rn

[@eph2vv89only1way]

The client saying that the 12 yo was coming on the him reminds me of my ex. He sexually abused my daughter between the ages of 5 and 15. When she finally spoke up years later he justified it by saying she came on to him. Like a 5 year old (or any age child) would come on to a grown man, especially their dad.

[@dmgroberts5471]

Even in the highly unlikely event that it _was_ true, it's still his responsibility as a freaking ADULT to not abuse a child. It's not even a defense.

[@NOACCEPTANCE772]

Did you beat the shit outta him? You shoulda let the neighbours know what he's been doing so they could beat him to a bloody pulp!

[@eph2vv89only1way]

@@dmgroberts5471 I said the same thing.

[@eph2vv89only1way]

@@NOACCEPTANCE772 I should have

[@Aurochhunter]

My cousin is serving time for something similar, though it was his step daughter rather than biological daughter. The thing is: he might have been eligible for parole by now, if not for his contempt of the court.

[@KohanKilletz]

I think rather than having an adversarial system, it's better to use the criminal court to ascertain guilt. Equal legal counsel should be provided to both sides, but with an eye to finding the truth rather than getting someone off or locking them up.

[@melissaharris3890]

That's what prosecution is supposed to do. They are representatives of justice, what ever that is.

[@Keshlynne]

Yikes! Here I was thinking psychologists faced the worst secondary trauma! Opinion changed!

[@katcooper-parker6213]

I feel like 911 call operators experience some of the worst secondary trauma, if you can call it that.

[@Keshlynne]

@@katcooper-parker6213 With 911 operators, I would see it as a unique combination of first and secondary trauma. The secondary trauma comes from the situation that they can only be a voice in or witness to, while the first trauma would come from the fear of everything going wrong or the uncertainty that they did everything possible and within their power to help the situation. Massive respect to people who do the job and are able to keep their sanity in check.

[@Sam_on_YouTube]

I am very thankful to people who do criminal defense. They are an important part of the system, protecting the innocent as best they can in difficult circumstances. I never could do it. I did a little prosecution when I first became a lawyer, but mostly I work in constitutional law. Not too many of these kind of stories in that field.

[@cyberneticraven358]

There was an answer in a similar thread that really paints a good picture of the viewpoints of lawyers that represent monsters. They try to make sure that the entire case and trial is air tight so that the monster can NOT go free on a technicality.

[@anthonyburke5656]

I was a young lawyer, doing legal aid, Police arrested a man on suspicion of break and enter, then found a dead woman in the house next door. During questioning the man made full disclosures not only to killing the dead woman but killing 4 others. During the first interview I rapidly realised the man was a ravening maniac and refused to be alone in an Interview Room with the man. The man was found unfit to plead and held for an indeterminate time in a mental institution.

[@MegaDrain]

10:29 I can to a degree understand why the clients would believe that. As someone who previously had cancer, whenever you go in for chemo you get injected with a form of steroids. With that knowledge I could totally see some asshole swinging that to convince cancer patients that buying his miracle steroids would cure their cancer. Especially since they would be desperate for anything else since chemo is crazy expensive.

[@AlannaEMurdoch]

thanks for the heads up about the thread turning dark. Im not in a great place to listen to dark stories right now. i really like the background footage. beautiful scenery

[@lrajic8281]

About animal cruelty, I will forever hate Clay Aiken, an American Idol season 2 runner up, who is very successful to this day. He admitted as a funny story, he purposely ran over a kitten. There is no excuse, he did it because he hates cats. He paid people to erase the story on internet. He talked about his happiness in running over a cat on TV.

[@bensoncheung2801]

Who *is* he??? American Idol season 2 runner up doesn’t do anything for me.

[@yaysuu]

Love how this channel has more personality than most if not all askreddit channels just by having an actual voice and commenting on a few stories. The gameplay helps too so I'm not staring at a boring looping space background or smth

[@internetcancer1672]

👍 thumbs up for the warning to your viewers about how s*** was about to get wild.

[@chrislife1101]

The slit throat story caught me off guard and had me tasting my own blood inside of my mouth throughout the entire video. I just couldn't help but continue to imagine myself choking on my own blood and having to spit it out everytime I try to swallow saliva, and the outside of my throat burning from the gash....fuck

[@victorherr101]

when he said "Viewer discretion is advised" things went 0 to 100 real fast

[@levene_c098]

Content warning: There’s a specific torture method that uses a similar cut across the neck to prolong suffering. (Usually the head would be completely severed and saved as a trophy). First, they’d make an incision from the right side of the neck (carotid) and follow up with incising the trachea. This would allow the newly oxygenated blood to pool in the esophagus and the trachea, causing hypoxia, mass hemorrhaging, and suffocation. As the body looses blood and begins to asphyxiate, it will try to counteract by taking longer and deeper breaths which further draw in more blood. Although drowning takes longer and may be prolonged, this type of torture and murder method is one of the worst.

[@WhooptyDoo]

@@levene_c098 isn't this the method you see in those terrorist beheadings?

[@levene_c098]

@@WhooptyDoo The majority of beheadings are actually a bit more tame than that. Most of the time, they perform beheadings more like a ritual but not with the initial intent to induce pain. Sure, they may have been tortured before, but they do not do the same method during the actual act of beheading. The act is a bit more swift, with less suffering, as they reach the spinal column in less time.

[@Confron7a7ion7]

Ok, now I understand why lawyer are so expensive. You can't physically pay for enough therapy.

[@Colbio]

My aunt is a public defender. Damn good one too. She prides herself on helping out people getting pushed around by the legal system and those who would abuse it. Which is unfortunate, because she had this one bastard of a defendant. Swore up and down he was innocent of his wife's murder. Aunt would later say she honestly thought HE believed it. The body cam footage of the officer who kicked down his door just in time to see he was holding the murder weapon in one hand and his wife's severed head in the other said otherwise.

[@adamb89]

Whatever simulated dude was riding that simulated bike, his balls are absolutely devastated. Just completely mulched into a goopy paste.

[@MiraTheWarlock]

Stories like the one with the kitten that was used as a chew toy is why NO MATTER WHAT, if you adopt an animal out, put as big a fee as you can get away with You might not need the money, you might only care it gets a good home, but that fee will deter most people like that awful couple from getting them. Giving it up for free is practically announcing you got free bait for someone's fight dogs or fodder to their giant python.

[@Averageidler-nj1qf]

Good idea.

[@zangryomani1257]

My dad: why don't you become a lawyer Me: Watch this video

[@ianh1504]

Fun fact, age discrimination only counts for old people. If they say you're too *young* to work or live somewhere, you can kick rocks for all the law cares.

[@LFanimes333]

Which makes sense Young people are stupid

[@lyssgoddess]

Thanks for all the stories for those who sent them on Reddit :) ❤ Thank you to all the public defenders for helping those less fortunate ☺️❤️

[@18videowatcher41]

I've heard that first one before. It's scary as hell that he couldn't even be bothered with pretending to be normal. I guess he was just so starved of fulfillment for his sick needs that he couldn't help himself. It's creepy, but it's for the best that it happened that way. Now he'll never be released and allowed to do things to innocent children.

[@themysticarcher3313]

[TW] That one story about the guy adopting the cat as a chew toy for his dog broke me. I have a black mouth cur (a type of hunting dog) that I’ve had since I was 5, and she’s always attacked anything that wasn’t a dog or human. I used to live on a house with an acre of completely fenced in land, so I think that really brought out the hunting part of her. One day, at our current house, there was a cat in our yard at about 7 in the morning. Why do I know this? Because she and my other dog (who’s a puppy, and I think would’ve gotten along with the cat fine) confronted it and were barking like CRAZY. I don’t know what the hell was wrong with that cat, but it was on the ground, several feet away from the fence. If you’ve had a dog then your probably know the way they play with their chew toys, the way they grab them with their teeth and shake them around as if to tear them apart. I got to watch my dog, my best friend, do that to a cat. I ran outside as fast as I could, and fortunately my mom got there before I did. I cry just thinking about it. We got the cat out of our backyard (it just didn’t want to leave for some reason) and I went to school that day traumatized. Unfortunately, I don’t think that cat had a happy ending. Some time later, maybe a few weeks or months, my mom was picking up dog poop in the yard and found a cat’s skull and other bones for supposedly other animals. I’m not sure weather or not I hope it was the same cat, but if it was then it must’ve been really stupid or there was something in our yard, and I can only hope no cats ever come anywhere near our house again

[@bombdotcom2168]

What justification does someone have for intentionally starving children?? Also story 19 really hit home for me- My mom was really similar to the mom mentioned in the story. She'd been manipulating my dad for years, and when I turned about maybe 6-7 she turned her abuse and manipulation toward me and it took countless cries for help for someone to help us out- And even then it took one hell of a fight for what my mom did to come to light

[@jasminelav.332]

There's 2 possibilities: Munchausen-by-proxy, where being a caretaker of sick children is used for constant praise and validation; or anorexia-by-proxy, when someone's ED extends to needing to control the diets of the people around them as well as their own.

[@bombdotcom2168]

@@jasminelav.332 That makes sense

[@atomicwrongs]

I'm really glad for the disclaimer at 3 minutes in. I could pause and come back when I felt more up to the stories, instead of getting sucked into the engines of the Depression Jet. Also, the OP of story 5 is a real one

[@TheTSense]

When it comes to criminal defense lawyers, it is important to know that the goal is not to "get the criminal off and free no matter the cost". It is to ensure that the trial is fair. Nobody gets over emotional or people are sent to jail for what the locals believe is wrong, but not actually in the law. Also, that the evidence is actually real and not just "I am sure" or "I believe". Cops pretty often convince themselves that someone is a bad guy, and then go on "the ends justify the means". We see it on TV all the time, it is okay to break the rules because the system is played by the evil people, so get him no matter what. So all it takes is one misunderstanding and good people with good intentions start faking reports. Someone in that room is suppose to ask "Is that actually enough for this punishment?"

[@davidhowell1415]

10:13 this person was so institutionalized that once out he didn’t know what to do so he did something that would put him back where he was comfortable

[@plazstic]

just watched shawshank redemption eh?

[@davidhowell1415]

@@plazstic no I’m a parole officer and I see that way more than I should. But good at you for your attempt

[@davidhowell1415]

@@plazstic what nothing to say?

[@plazstic]

@@davidhowell1415 the longer you linger the sadder you seem

[@davidhowell1415]

@@plazstic 🤣👍✌️🤡

[@mordanthubris6516]

That last story brought flashbacks. There's a haunting quality to...a certain kind of scream that sticks with you, even if it's just recorded. I never saw anything as bad as what was described there but I know the sort of thing they are talking about.

[@iloveplasticbottles]

Weird how murderers are fine with killing other people but don't wanna get the death penalty when they're caught.

[@Person01234]

uhuh, random guy selling 1 billion dollars of land. Is there a news article about some dudes buying a state sized plot of land? Seems like it'd be newsworthy.

[@Lenin941FN]

If that guy is American, then rejecting the no jail offer is probably the smartest move he could have made because from what I've heard, medical bills in america can bankrupt several generations of a family

[@cadillacdeville5828]

Depend, it definitely can

[@richardcostello360]

It's ALOT cheaper to sit in jail for 10 years than to pay medical bills in America

[@NicxSolo]

The one guy getting 'Ramsey Bolton'ed... And living through it...

[@jbridge7962]

Thanks for the heads up, trying to have a good day and I really appreciate it. I'm going to move onto the next one

[@buenapilapil5513]

I once read a story similar to the last one, and iirc none of them got the death penalty after taking plea deals

[@kommo1]

And this is why there so few public defenders, why nobody wants to take the job and why we should legally mandate that every lawyer should do public defending.

[@Mia-dt3gl]

Not a lawyer, but I’ll just namedrop Courtney Clenney here.

[@BlueBeluga]

I’m replying to namedrop Casey Anthony.

[@Mia-dt3gl]

@@BlueBeluga That case was awful. Hopefully Courtney doesn’t get away with it.

[@Killdroid96]

I wanna know more about the last story. That has to have some wild backstory to it. I want to know if the people got life in prison or the chair.

[@gabrielbaumeister2498]

Okay damn. I clicked this video thinking there would be some disturbing stories. I did not know I could get this sick by reading/hearing stories, but this is so unimaginably messed up

[@SenseiRaisen]

My old classmate who happens to be a lawyer once talk with my sister who is near the end to be one as well. She once told why she didn't want the job in the district prescint in my city anymore. One day she has to prosecute the MIL of one of the heads of a local gang group on my city for murder. Let's said, their name was translated as "The Mokeys" for not leave to much details. Despite all of the dispute with their lawyers, my classmate insist to had a talk to talk with the MIL. When my classmate enters and ask, the MIL suddenly leans forward and probably make the most horrid moment in my classmate's career. She start by calling my classmate by her full name, tell the full name of her mother and said she is also a lawyer, tell the full name of her siblings , tell the full name of her biological father who was divorced to her mother and who i don't even know at all. Tell the hours she went in and out, tell where she live before, the grade school we attended, the hours the mother went out and the siblings, the school the siblings attend ... etc. Basically my classmate was mortified to abject horror of that. Because in those words, they know who she is, where she is, what their family does, etc, as a form of thread against my old classmate. She simply abandon the place and at the edge of a mental breakdown and an anxiety attack if wasn't for her coworkers. In all the fat b-tch has a smug on her face my classmate still remember. Honestly the this is the reason why i abide some criminals should be burned alive. This is also paint something more horrible and sinister because ... there is no way they had that type of surveillance at all, and more in my country. That is when she realize the sinister part. There is a big chance they use their own kids for spy the people's activity around their house by disguising them as kids who are playing around there. It make so much sense because her old house is located literally on the side of where i use to go to school with her, her studio is 2 streets from there and there is a supermarket and a park in the same vicinity as well too.

[@PaulBarwick]

Thank you for the warning at 2:58 I'm noping out of here. I really appreciate the tip

[@lordmarshmal_0643]

This has me somewhat worried as someone who's taking a digital forensics specialization program in university lul

[@FoxSullivan]

Ooooh boy you better not have a sensitive stomach. And I don't mean this in a joking way. Also, the stench of death is not something one can easily forget.

[@theycallmechad4063]

15:08 this is exactly how my ex is. This is painful to hear and reminds me of stuff ion wanna remember

[@georgem7965]

This shows that there are some truly, honest to god, evil people out there. Ovver my last 35 years as an attorney I have only done a couple minor criminal defense cases for the reasons mentioned here. Domestic relations (divorce) cases can be very tough because one or both parties don't really want to wind things up civilly and get on with their lives. They want to cut out the other person's heart and eat it as revenge. I knew a judge who commonly, when property division was disputed, told one party to divide up the property into two equal value groups, and the other party got to choose first. It was like having one child cut 2 pieces of pie and the othe child getting to pick first. I only did a few devorces but I told a prospective client that if what you want is to finish things up and get on with your lives I will represent you. If you want to punish the other person, go find another lawyer.

[@dented_riddles9967]

Ah yes, that good old Christian holiday... Memorial Day.

[@edit._011_]

The neighbor that sang to the dying soul who sang back, I believe that made the death slightly less scary! Rest in peace!

[@BodyByBenSLC]

12:40 I got one. I work in property management about oh 2 and half 3 years ago I am maintaince at a small community 125 unit, alot of people living on state benefits or rent assistance. Guy living there 35-38 years old, about 6 feet tall skinny white guy, has some emotional issues, might even have had some cognitive problems. He has emotional support animal, a real hyper boxer puppy that was the cutest thing you have ever seen. He walked that dog 4 5 times a day because it's such high energy. Spring day me and the office manager start to realize we having seen guy walking his dog for a few days. We ask around if anyone has seen him, call him no answer, knock on his door, nothing. Now at point in time it is about the 17th of month, he's paid up. We can't go in unless we have warrant or some kind of emergency. I show up to work 8am cop and 70 year old man waiting at office. The 70 year old is the guts farther and they are there to do wellness check. We go up to unit 318 I open door, the smell hits me like a punch in face. He is right in front room missing the top half of his head, the body had swollen up to about twice its size and had turned black and purple, 45 in his lap. His dad was right behind me I still remember the cry of anguish that poor man let out. Boxer puppy is running around the hall, it got so excited it threw up, guys hair was in the dogs vomit. Working in apartments you see some wild stuff, I have pictures on the very phone I am typing this on of crime scenes, destroyed apartments,dead animals, dead bodies, I've patched bullet holes and found drugs and weapons hidden in walls but that was the most grizzly site I've ever seen.

[@BodyByBenSLC]

That was a crazy day, everything that happened. Cops, crime scenes investigators, crime scene clean up, the smell it's all really vague memories because of everything happening all at once. But the thing I can remember clear as day. His feet, the damage to his face and swelling of body almost didn't even look human except for his feet. The black/blue discoloration had only made it just below the ankle and his feet still looked mostly normal. It's like a photo in my mind.

[@ahillmann]

_"...his interview with the guy made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end... her interview where she attempted to justify what she did to both sets of kids disturbed me more than any of the murder cases I've worked on."_ I really want to hear more about those interviews.

[@gregoryk.9815]

The one that had the provision in the contract you need to talk to the state's bar association's ethics board.

[@kinda_cold_in_the_closet]

the p3dophiles had me gagging and wretching for a while

[@aanakk]

"And he's blinking." At first, I thought something along the lines of: "What in the actual f...", but then I came to the conclusion this is a fabricated story, because apparently he was lying there with blunt force trauma for a week, unable to get up. If he didn't have the strength to let his dogs out, how the hell did he not die of dehydration? There were some cases of people surviving longer without water due to individual bodies, but the trauma makes it WAY harder to believe. If not for the sheer shock of the plot twist, would have caught on immediately.

[@adriantallent8557]

Brain damage can do weird things to people physiologically. It's possible his metabolism slowed to the point that he could last 7 days without water but I think the blood loss from the dogs would have complicated that. Messed up story even if it isn't true.

[@aanakk]

@@adriantallent8557 don't forget that it's Reddit. They like to forge stories. So by the principle of Occam's Razor, it may be possible that some weird stuff has happened, but it's more likely just forged.

[@mauricebenink]

He was mostlikely braindead. Only the subconscious brain functions resumed. Heart is mainly pumping blood to the brain and lungs. Rest of the body is mostlikely already dead. Basically a coma.

[@jasonellis4330]

8:03 No, not women, those are children.

[@Kit-uj3mw]

I don't know how anyone has the mental to do this job.

[@novied5871]

My former high school art teacher had already moved and living in a different town when this happened. He got busted for cp he drew. Look up Coen Potts of Topeka Ks if some reason you want to know more.

[@Ghostfacescreamer]

When he said this is when things get bad and oh wait there’s more I was blown away by both

[@therainbowgamer5126]

The thing about the being stabbed in the neck stories is that that’s just kinda of a ticking clock to when you die. Unless you stop the bleeding almost immediately and manage to continually prevent the bleeding than your good as dead

[@Thomas_The_Thermonuclear_Bomb]

Who let the dogs out? Not her, I suppose. Hope they were taken to a loving home afterwards, and got help for the trauma they experienced

[@calvinmeier1662]

7:44 That’s the “justice” system for you.

[@Deathreaper-up2oy]

anyone know what case he is talking about at 20:00?

[@joncollins4950]

hopefully someone figures it out, i'm interested.

[@tysondennis1016]

If I was in any of those scenarios, I’d be like, “Convict my client, give them the max sentence.”

[@brillopower1492]

TIL I'm not nearly as strong of stomach as I thought.

[@robertgraybeard3750]

[@Maeshalanadae]

The biggest monsters are revealed where children are involved.

[@krankarvolund7771]

Yeah, the part where the lawyer said the worst are always the frauders, not there's all the sexual assault and crimes on minor part of the law ^^'

[@lydiapetra1211]

These are very interesting!!! I love your narration!! Please do more of these!!!! Lotsa psychopaths.... plenty of female psychopaths.....

[@bensoncheung2801]

4:42 And I’ll bet that very same kid would violently protest at the idea of the same being done to him as well, guess the call of the void’s easy to answer when you won’t be the one paying the consequences, *huh?* (Guy was 17, so consequences were probably minimized too, absolutely awful stuff here)

[@SharpForceTrauma]

Good god above, story 24 hit hard. That poor man :(

[@williamtimonen6814]

What annoys me so much about this thread is that its obviously asking for a moment where the client did something that changed the attorneys opinion on the client dramatically. Then so many of these are just impersonal descriptions of their crimes?

[@notajaxon9476]

Well, not exactly an actual court case nor am I an actual lawyer, but when I was in school studying law. As a family activity, we pretend that we're in court and we put random things on trial such as my little sister stuffed animals and they testify against each other. One night my little sister was upset at one of our two family cats so she wanted to put them on trial, I thought this was going to be hard because the only person that they really listen to was me. So then came the struggle of having them sit still, we got that problem fixed. We finally put Riley, The boy cat, on trial, he was accused of messing with my little sisters toys and she wanted him to spend 2 minutes in meow meow jail, a box, so since I love the cats more than everybody else, not true I just like saying that. I was Riley's defense attorney and my little sister was representing herself. She said that she watched Riley commit the crime and then I yelled "objection. No he didn't" and since my mom was the judge, she asked to see evidence and I pointed to the fact that I was petting Riley at the time of the crime. He was accused of committing. Then I asked to see my little sister's evidence and she said she saw him in her room, I asked her what exactly was he doing? And she said she was standing over her toys and some of her toys were misplaced. I then said "maybe you move the toys when you got up to leave the room" gathering all the evidence I could. The toys circled around the area with no toys. Presumably where my little sister sit to play with all them so it would be logical for her foot to accidentally move a toy when she got up. The case was going well until Jesse, Riley's sister, walked into the courtroom unannounced and started meowing at everybody. The judge had to tried to Tell her to shut up but she wouldn't listen so the bailiff, my dad, the escort her out of the courtroom. The only problem is Riley's very protective of his sister so Riley jumped out of my lap and latched onto my da- the bailiff's leg and then a whole fight ensued. For those that are wondering, Riley has been subpoenaed to appear in court again and so has Jesse and I was fired for tripping and falling so I'm no longer allowed to work at family Court (also I was put on trial for tripping and falling. I lost the case and got 15 minutes in time out, I was 15)

[@rhiannonmcdaniel2313]

Thank you for the warning!

[@sophiefrankis9476]

I heard the first story ages ago and its horrifying.

[@Imjustkendall]

Not a lawyer and not a client and not a monster but….

[@stayspicy1721]

*LAWYERS* when did *YOU* realize *MY* client was a monster" 5 seconds later: im an [NOT LAWYER], MY:FIGURE OF IMPORTANCE is one

[@rareram]

Okay, ickickick hiding glass under your skin? Nope nope nope.

[@micahclark4092]

The first one was a jump scare, bro literally rabid for kids. And at the DENTIST of all places 🤢

[@DndNate-qs1fz]

When I heard "viewer discretion is advised" then well if you stayed you know what happened 3:00

[@LoriPeace]

I listened to one more story after the warning because you know, how bad can it be. Yeah, no, stopped it right after the next one. And you read another 18 minutes? Dude, you have to have gotten traumatized by all that -- are you okay?

[@IoEstasCedonta]

A *billion* dollars? What, did that guy own his own town?

[@xanderunderwoods3363]

Evil is real folks.

[@ryanclemons1]

the real monsters are the lawyers who try and help the monsters to start with.

[@fatdaddy1996]

You're wrong and stupid Ryan.

[@ryanclemons1]

@@fatdaddy1996 Man rapes 6 year old lawyer finds ways loophole so the guy gets 1/10th of the time in jail. How is that not a monster?

[@aron3197]

As a 1st year law student, I am regretting my life choices

[@flickcentergaming680]

It's not too late to pick something with a lower chance of trauma.

[@rhobidderskag1121]

Pedophile man in the dentist office: Swiggity swooty.

[@witchy90210]

They were a literal can of monster energy drink.

[@Hanako..A]

I was going to go to sleep after this, BUT HOW WILL I SLEEP

[@stanislavastartseva9639]

Gosh, that was not a good idea to listen to this before going to sleep 😣

[@magnusm4]

Having such awful clients, I would've liked them to object the sentence and demand it be twice that, citing their action as representing the chinese justice system and their customs.

[@apathyreview3964]

Wait did the guy whose wife was threatened kill his client? Sounded a bit like that.

[@doms.6701]

17:51 bartenders: am I a joke to you Sorry but there is no way attorneys have the highest percentage of alcoholics.

[@krankarvolund7771]

I searched for way longer than I thought I would need, there's no easy data about bartenders, there's just a generic restauration category (around 11% of the people who work there are alcoholics). I've found a limited study about around 450 bartenders, for a week, 39% had harmful alcohol consumption during the study and 43,6% had moderate/severe alcohol use. Lawyers are around 20 to 25%, so it's higher than the statistics easily available for all professions (even miners are only at 17%), but probably lower than bartenders if you separate them from general restauration ^^ Also medical profession is around 15% which is probably not a good news XD

[@radicalxg8282]

3:39 Least depraved slaneesh followers

[@richardcostello360]

Khorne takes that guy that got eaten by his dogs though

[@frostygamer5795]

ngl I cracked up a bit at 7:38

[@mixedbaggamer]

The cat made me pissed the dogs made me lose my appetite

[@empyie666]

"jews dont celebrate memorial day" is my favorite part of this video

[@flickcentergaming680]

That shit was hilarious.

[@andrewbonafilia984]

I atleast like to hear that defense attorneys actually sometimes flat out hate their clients, I kind of figured they did hate some but this is confirmation. Gotta be tough believing in the law, which also means you believe everyone deserves someone to be on their side... Which must suck for the defense attornies when they know their client is a monster but you can't just not defend them... Its their duty to do it, its the law that they have an attorney to defend them.

[@googlesucks1039]

Yet some people think the death penalty is wrong

[@Levanderstonegaming]

you can hear his voice change starting at 2:44

[@Konoko2000]

ok that 1st story type will always anger me >> why is in any form of good behaviour or clean reports taken into consideration for pedophiles of course they will be on their best behaviour, their bad behaviour that got them in prison in the 1st place is totally absent >>

[@viorp5267]

14:20 Lol yeah

[@AlexisGarcia-sr5bh]

Damn guess I’m gone change my focus on something else than criminal defense

[@darthcravus]

15:33 this sounds like my sister in law she's a chronic cheater