Overcoming Trauma: The Difference Between HEALTHY & UNHEALTHY Love! | Sheleana Aiyana

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[@RisingWoman]

Thanks for having me on the show Lewis, I appreciated our conversation and the thoughtful questions you asked. I hope something I shared brought comfort or deeper self-understanding to some of your listeners. - Shay

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@amswestyorkshire8048]

Thank you too. I've bought your course BTO back in 2020 is one of the best thing that I've done for myself. Thank you to you now I've engaged and in a very happy relationship ❤❤

[@locknload5908]

You have spoken so well and so much of what you have described resonates deeply with me. Thank you for helping me make sense of some of my own past, and understand where some of those patterns may have come from.

[@fdematteis9]

Everything you said resonated with me Sheleana. Your story gives me hope as I am still struggling to find my footing. This interview with Lewis shed more light into my darkness than any other. Infinite blessings to you and all that you do.

[@dawnwebbmusic4837]

You are loved ❤

[@jimboman1]

"Take on each other's baggage as a team". Boy did that hit home.

[@DavidVelasquez9]

Great video, there is nothing like a perfect marriage or relationship, I learnt that in everything there is always a solution, 5 years ago I and my wife divorced because we were having some difficulties in our marriage but we are back together ,it was a really bad phase but we got through it

[@DavidVelasquez9]

@Emilio Yepez its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is SHELLY RENEE WHITE.

[@alexandraalbertz1442]

Scam....both of you. Pls stop playing your games in this comment section

[@shecultivates]

hahaha autobots

[@stopitsofia8562]

I love this woman so much 😩 everything shes saying hits home

[@v9b23j]

This is an amazing episode. Sheleana's self-awareness and emotional maturity is astounding. I used to think that healing was a solitary journey. Listening to this episode, I'm beginning to think that it's in the relationship that we heal; where the romantic bond completes our attachment injuries that come from our unresolved and un-repaired parental bond from our childhood. It's in the intimate partner relationship that we see our strengths and weaknesses; it shows us where we need to do our work, grow, mature and reparent each other's inner child. And with a compatible partner, this is possible. We can release trauma stored in our body by doing a deep psoas trauma release; as Lewis says, we literally shake our body violently as if we were having a seizure; this is an involuntary response to a traumatic event that animals do to release their trauma from the body. If we don't do this or somatic experiencing therapy, trauma remains in our body and whenever we are triggered in the present moment, it gets reactivated and we react with fight, flight, freeze or fawn.

[@lewishowes]

Thank you so much for watching!

[@v9b23j]

@@lewishowes Thank you for hosting the show 😊Your episodes and work are inspiring so many of us!

[@scottaussem5028]

On Fathers day ive been thinking. My father showed me unconditional love. I never thought he didnt love me. Got mad at me yes. Disappointed sometimes. Yes but i always knew he loved me.

[@jp5419]

She's so so incredible. Thank you for sharing her with us 🙏❤️🌈

[@soniao.2266]

I love her energy and admire her journey and resilience. Thank you for a wonderful interview 🙏

[@TIG2MAN0]

I am always looking for mentors around the world to replace parents LOL, I kinda built my own "family" of supportive people.

[@ramashakaroun2863]

Can you teach me how I can build my own? please

[@TIG2MAN0]

@@ramashakaroun2863 its pretty easy, surround yourself with healthy people. I look for mentors also. What country are you from?

[@taniagil3122]

Wonderful conversation. Would love to hear more and see more on this topic especially healing trauma through the body. Thank you!!

[@LebronFlockaJames6]

I recently followed you on IG trying to get more positive content on my feed. I saw the clip you posted of this conversation on there and it really resonated with me and my most recent relationship situation ending. She literally summed it up so succinctly it shook me. This is a very profound episode of your podcast. Thank you so much for making this episode. It’s helping me heal so much. You’ve earned a life long fan, I’ll have to check the book out. Thank you so much, both of you, keep doing what you’re doing. Peace and love from Ohio.

[@erinhappy-go-lucky5040]

Hi Lewis 😁. Please have more podcasts on Somatic healing 🥰. #Gratefulfortheschoolofgreatness 😍!

[@aura7153]

I've received an email from her site that she had a podcast with lewis and I felt very excited to watch 😍😍❤️

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡

[@Olivia0585]

My gosh! This is a beautiful, wonderful, AMAZING conversations! I am working on this with my new partner and it is beautiful to experience. ❤Thank you so much for this!! Every single work has been so vulnerable and authentic. Lewis, your questions are masterpieces. The dating app addiction! It’s real! I’m so thankful for this poignant exchange❤❤❤

[@ayomafonseka6178]

I can relate to this very well. Abandoned by both parents at a very early age. being in a boarding home...etc.

[@calmingrelaxingsoundsASMR]

This interview is incredible, thank you. I can relate to her story a lot 🙏

[@BeccaL2016]

After watching a couple of interviews like this, including one for Ryan Montgomery, I can almost conclude that being a good or a bad person is more of nature than nurture. People can live in the darkest place in the world yet still shining and people who are bad seeds can be so evil even they have a better life…born with bad or good seeds define you!

[@fruityeva]

Thank you! Gives me hope!❤❤❤Sometimes I feel like the work on myself that I do is for nothing. But I know that in the longrun it will be worth it.☺️

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@kschindle1]

Best honest webcast Lewis

[@TIG2MAN0]

Those co-dependent relationships with parents are TOUGH even cult like. That is my relationship with my dad.

[@carlareginaga]

I love her and follow Rising Woman. ❤ Thank you for all your work Sheleane and Lewis🙏🏻💜✨

[@jp5419]

Me too. ❤

[@monicarriles5279]

So do I!

[@MyraPhoenix1974]

Thank you for this video and share this story

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome! Appreciate you for watching. 🧡

[@fdematteis9]

Thank you Lewis. I relate so so much to this interview. Seeing how Sheleana continues to overcome her shadows, her light and her awareness of trauma with the solutions she offers to overcome ourselves in the process of healing are instrumental in my personal recovery. Forever grateful for your work and hers. Can't wait to get her book and join rising woman.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@sandrabollocks16]

Wow she is amazing. Great episode, would love to see her on here again - so much wisdom

[@TheFrenchNanny]

This is sooo true! ❤il knew my dad loved me but was unable to show because he didn’t even know how to love himself.

[@gingershock]

Incredible!!! The most inspiring and moving talk. What a precious gift to listeners 🎁 Ngā mihi, thank you Sheleana and also Lewis

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@catharinealexander89]

Wow, what a great interview. Sheleana has such a beautiful and healing presence. It feels like she is so anchored in love and truth. Thank you for sharing this with the world!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@priyaramdoo4762]

Wow thank you Lewis for this truly healing sharing ..This lady is pure love and she give pure love ,joy , light courage and hope to the whole world thank you

[@cynthiaangel5429]

Thank You Blessings! 💖💖💖💖💖

[@connie10000]

Love this interview❤ Interesting comments: Attracting wrong ppl due to Inner wounds/Father wounds/Starving for Love. Happened to me..."the pattern cycle" yet I now have those Radar Antennas & Obeying HS Whispers when meditating, journaling, reading Bible. Love her spiritual side❤

[@slimilacraft7676]

Thank you so much you two. I now understand why I responded the way I did in my most recent relationship.

[@Jennifer-ez5lp]

Wow. Any potential partners will be asked to watch this before I speak with them. Amazing. And so much to do… and also not do and just allow.

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@nourhealing2516]

So beautiful

[@kathleenangel8196]

Her online course was a blessing ❤

[@lewishowes]

🙌

[@kasiai5437]

Loved this. Thank you both.

[@Paeoniarosa]

She is a beautiful, resilient spirit.

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@kschindle1]

❤ amazing information partners allies in each other's inner child ❤️

[@lewishowes]

Thanks for being here!

[@adiliarosa-inspiraramoreal3920]

Grateful for sharing!!! ❤❤

[@lourdesmatias9629]

Beautiful, thank you. Such light!

[@robabahanjra]

Appreciate this Mr Howes....needed this...thanks for the differentiation. Wake up calls bringing us into the light and true reality of the situations we are in can only then help us to create pathways of self love and lead us to be protagonists in our journey of love

[@lakwak]

Thank you so much!

[@TheWingmenShow]

Awesome insight & knowledge! Great episode!

[@marasaviotti5018]

What a truly amazing interview that has taught me so much. Thank you ❤

[@lightyourway4929]

Thank you for sharing and a very helpful story of resilience through challenges.

[@craigosterberg5045]

Thanks for sharing

[@janinepolanco319]

Her book is incredible!

[@sannepoormohsen7566]

Thank you🙏🏻

[@Sacredfireheart]

Sooooooo powerful!!! 🙏🏽💪🏽🔥

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@teenafrench7236]

She's amazing, great video! Can' t wait to read your book Lewis...I bet it's incredible.

[@jennifercastro6588]

I lap up every word she says and her book is transformative 💝

[@Marynett_2024]

Thank you❤

[@christinasciortino8400]

Such an amazing interview 🙌🏼🥹, thank you 🙏🏼✨💖

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@marcobucceri8530]

Stunning interview Lewis, a big thank you to both of you. What an amazing woman!

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@LJewellery]

Wow, I love the conscious talk between you with so much insight into the Human soul ♥️

[@lewishowes]

Thanks for being here!

[@elite_always]

Hi Lewis,to a great man with great questions 😊giving us a glimse of what is "a school of greatness" I thank u v much for this podcast I enjoyed it v much as I relate & I connected a lot with your host Sheleana who is an amazing & true beautiful soul!I grow up all my life watching my father suffering & my mother suffering so much in front of me & I never succeed to bring help or confort to any of them but watching this made me realise that Iam not alone,so thanks a lot

[@lewishowes]

Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂

[@Momentum123go]

Situationship … I love it

[@aliceindiamonds-77]

Chills!

[@seleenarian2111]

This is so good 👍🏻😊

[@JanetCorbin-cf8pq]

Nervous system responses we know to go down to, interesting Plus the body stress in muscles to shake out violently. (When going to the gym for the first time in years, I was and my body felt extremely happy afterwards) being older my body feels too much 'unnecessary' stress. Whatever the depression and tinnitus since retiring stopped going to the gym, since retirement it has felt I ran millions of miles being through so much.

[@sandisesiphokazi4740]

I am so grateful I saw this. Resonate with so much of it & also gives confirmation on what I need to do next concerning my healing journey. Thank you so much.

[@lewishowes]

🙏

[@vickibazter3446]

"Seen. Celebrated. Supported. ALLY, not enemy."

[@yuvikagupta10]

Really loved it

[@lewishowes]

Thank you!

[@Dangerously13]

I can relate and one must heal ❤

[@Virvepaulina]

This is beautiful! ❤

[@lewishowes]

Thank you!

[@HestiNurnaningsih]

Thank you for the video. It gives me new sight about relationship suppose to be.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@RRM611]

🎉🎉🎉🎉 Celebration thanks for sharing 😁

[@aprillovenlife]

I love this woman❤

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@aura7153]

Love love shay before watching even ❤❤

[@jasmyndevlin9334]

❤wow this is so interesting ! Thank you thank you

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@cinthyalc1162]

WOOOOW

[@jyotinain3957]

Wow!!❤

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@theresagartland8440]

Loved this episode, thank you! Lewis, I’m doing a ton of inner child work and reparenting myself. How do assign new meaning to a memory so you can heal the inner child wounds? Can you Ella orate more on this for me. Thanks!

[@cathynunaley7476]

woah! real

[@TIG2MAN0]

Human meat market LOL, thats very true. Yes also If I don't know the person or if they are emotionally unavailable/blank then they are not attractive regardless of outward appearance.

[@aliceindiamonds-77]

From suffering to serving !

[@jp5419]

Feel like you two will start a sincere friendship. About time this convo took place.

[@bettycarol8752]

Great womanhood, thank

[@oyukigarcia5601]

Who else got the chills when she talked about the dead butterfly 🦋in her hand??!!

[@Jompiheyholetsgo]

❤❤❤

[@sofialazuli1587]

Thank you Lewis and Sheleana for this amazing conversation, I was so so emotional watching this and I cried a-lot through it but it was eye opening for me about things I’m experiencing in my life.

[@Virvepaulina]

42:11

[@tianiemitchell5692]

I think they're just strong bond spiritually between a mother and a child and I think she felt her mother's love for her period as a mother, I always seem to know when my children need me even when they're not near me physically. Some people call it Mother's instincts I think children have the same instincts towards their parents.

[@tianiemitchell5692]

The question you just asked her how does a child raised in foster care with no mother and so on so forth Memphis know what we're lacking and then therefore know what we need ending focus on that need not only for ourselves but to make sure we get that to our children

[@Virvepaulina]

46:22

[@ClintWooden]

And how do I even get thar 🎉

[@yofitjamie22]

So I’ve been in 2 abusive relationships as a teenager and I’m currently happily married. My problem is feeling anxiety sometimes when I’m talking to my partner and I really do think it has to do with feeling in danger after my past relationships. I’ve been considering therapy but is there anything else I can do? Therapy is so expensive!

[@fabiolabergi]

I have found Sheleana’s book Becoming The One very helpful. It covers topics such as anxiety and has several tools to self regulate and soothe.

[@fabiolabergi]

Wishing you a kind and gentle path ahead. ❤️

[@yofitjamie22]

@@fabiolabergi thank you, I added it to my list of books to read this year!

[@captainbarbosa6567]

I ve seen ads for online therapy that is quite affordable. Also there is so much good quality content on YT for free about different topics so you could get started finding your own answers. Journaling is very recommended tool by any therapist. Meditation or mindfulness. I deal with anxiety issues and all these have helped me.

[@claudinediamond2555]

State Farm has no loyalty to their customers. This is my personal experience. On a different note. This interview is awesome.

[@morseliliana]

The pod cast is great, listening to it for the 2nd time but I dislike the commercials, specially because I pay KZbin so I don’t have to deal with them 😕, It just stops flowing…

[@knowledgemusiclaughsjesus]

Trying to find episode 61

[@lewishowes]

You may find it here lewishowes.com/61 🙏

[@knowledgemusiclaughsjesus]

@@lewishowes thank you so much

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@heikesauerwein6318]

What if you never had the feeling that your mum (or dad) loved you? When your dad tells you that he, regrets that he got kids?

[@cancer.creative]

Ignore what your father said, you are loved. ❤ As hard as it may feel or sound.. believe in yourself, heal and grow 🙏💕

[@shaash5236]

To this lady I say: don’t worry about wanting to keep your baby pain free and close. The longer you do, the freer she will be.

[@JanetCorbin-cf8pq]

Unsure what your saying, hold onto the pain, then the sooner you will get better??

[@shaash5236]

⁠hi, I didn’t say anything about holding onto pain. On the contrary we need to let go of it (not that that’s always easy). Basically I was saying that the longer you keep your child close (and pain free), the freer she will be

[@laura2587]

I pay you tube fees to not have ads! Love your pod cast but not the infomercials. . Im off elsewhere 👋

[@MrG100000008]

If this little stories make people famous, I would be a top celebrity.

[@mamaJmama]

Thank you❤

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@Virvepaulina]

48:06