LGBTQ+ Tik Toks to trans your gender

[@Xquellena]

“You can’t just be pretty, you have to act pretty.” I’m going to use that a lot

[@irishjournalgaming]

it was gen so moving

[@remember-amnesia]

i think i'll remember that quote

[@Emma-Maze]

I checked out his music and he seems so sweet in general

[@Nikkidafox]

Andromeda I love how you not only link all of the creators' tik toks but their soundclouds or anything else that hosts their work. It shows that you really care about them and aren't just using it as a content farm.

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

Agreed: It's always nice to see creators getting credited :P How are you doing today? (^^)

[@Ebus-ob2mq]

Also love that they put pronouns of the people in the video AND extra info where needed!❤

[@sprumf]

Jacksfilms would be proud.

[@Ducky_Joyful]

6:40 Everyone needs to see this. I am aroace and I look very queer. But one time, i was taking the bus home and a man with an aroace badge on his bag walked past. He did not look obviously queer, which shows how not every gay person is not a twink, androgynous, or extravagant.

[@dalekblep8136]

That last person really hit the nail on the head! As an agender person myself, there's still a lot of stuff that 'doesn't make sense' to my logically inclined brain, like the idea that trans men can be lesbians or trans women gay etc... but after all, they're just using the definer that is most suited and comfortable for them, and who am i to take that away from them just because i don't understand it? The life experience of queer people is so beautiful because it is so ungodly messy and indefinable. Labels do help us find community and communicate with each other and fight for our rights, but ultimately, what matters most is that we are all comfortable in our bodies and heads for the little time we spend on this tiny rock in space

[@tinywitchfrogs_]

Absolutely!! Our identities are so much bigger than ourselves, labels are just the tools we use to better understand our experiences,, these big cosmic feelings that are different for everyone. I feel like a lot of people don't realize that just because 2 individuals may use the same descriptors despite those labels meaning two different things to each of them, it doesn't invalidate their own individual experiences

[@Invalidcas]

i saw a profile that legitimately made me sick, it was a person looking for a partner, and they said they wanted anyone who was AFAB... as a transman, i was absolutely repulsed, because that's putting me in the same box with women, and excluding trans women- that's the same calling me a woman or saying im basically a woman, and i think that should be called what it is. Transphobia. It's Transphobia hidden behind "inclusive" language.

[@Invalidcas]

@@Sipsipsippinonlambtears Yeah, i dont have an issue with anyone disagreeing with it, i was just upset. they said they were Married to a man (they didn't say whether he was trans or not), they also didn't say if they were interested in "passing" trans men or not, I tried not to exclude any relavant info they didnt- it was just a point of like- using amab and afab to simulate a new gender binary- i don't think its transphobic to not want to date a trans woman (as long as its not rooted in transphobia) but i find it at least a little transphobic to refer to trans people as the gender they were assigned at birth- i dont have an issue with like- only being interested in people who you have similar experiences with, but calling someone afab just sounds like a new way of calling them a woman- thats just how i take it personally, if i should change how my original comment was worded let me know, if it was too harsh or something...

[@Sipsipsippinonlambtears]

​@@Invalidcas No, no, you're all good with your wording! I don't see it as harsh. If the situation looks like transphobia/grouping to you, then I'd say your comment is a pretty appropriate and reasonable response to a situation like that. I do get what you've said in your reply and I understand why you'd see being called AFAB as just being called a woman since a lot of people use that term that way. As if trans men and enbies are just women 2.0. Thank you for explaining about your point of view more in depth and being polite. You have every right to be upset over this 🍓🫐

[@ashyy_orbitz]

sounds like Theyre a ch@ser…that sucks!

[@reyreybaebae]

thats so gross man. grouping their preferences by body parts/agab is weird and absolutely transphobic.

[@Invalidcas]

@@reyreybaebae afab doesnt mean "vagina" and "breasts" plenty of trans men and nonbinary people get surgery to change that- and plenty of trans women do have vaginas- plus i dont have an issue with people prefering one part over another, obviously- I've just been very dysphoric recently being called a girl and afab constantly- and I've seen a general growing upset with the use of afab and amab to recreate the binary- i have no issue with who anyone dates, im just Dysphoric and constantly being reminded that everyone sees me as a girl.

[@robgoblinn]

I love how these videos remind me that im not alone in life ❤️

[@DibesthofthebestL]

Same❤️

[@picante28]

i think the creator doesn't realize how much of an impact these vids have, like everytime, they make my whole day and mood way better

[@thegoosegirl42]

The answer to "can trans men be lesbians" is "none of my business". If someone tells me, yes I'm a trans man and a lesbian, hell yeah my guy. But this is not a theoretical question to throw around, it is just people's lives. So it's none of my business whether it's possible. It is what it is. Also people HAVE to educate themselves on queer history. There is so much more to queerness and gender and sexuality.

[@Emma-Maze]

I was very confused by it and my initial reaction was also rejecting it but then I realised that labels are supposed to serve people, and serve to communicate oneself to others in the way one feels is the most accurate, nothing more to it than that. And for some transmasc peeps it feels entirely right to keep identifying with that label, that community and it communicates what they want it to so it serves them well and that's entirely valid.

[@Diiti_Cage]

A lesbian is a woman who dates another woman, Trans woman can never be a lesbian because genitals matter, that's why there are trans women coming online cying that Lesbians won't date them.

[@Milo-hp9fw]

I went to Badlands and got my haircut!!! I've mostly been getting feminine short haircuts because the hairdresser doesn't want to give me a masc one, but this hairdresser gave me exactly what I wanted! I found the place using Strands for Trans, which finds trans friendly haircut places near you. It's a great resource!

[@gremlinsunited2433]

Omg definitely gonna add that to the Queer Resource, that’s so cool!!

[@bluehoneyblood8697]

* downloads Everywhere Is Queer app * * types in location * * rural Germany * all right so there's no more balloons so go ahead and go

[@Nella_nova]

I live in a small country and i saw two and i was happy but then i clicked on them and neither of the websites worked 🫤

[@arnerademacker]

Well your first mistake was thinking Germany is on the technology train. Really chose your spawn location poorly for that :D There is, however, a trend I have noticed of people putting flags out in store windows and doors more and more, if they are at least supportive of the community. Find your nearest town or city, have a walk around the pedestrian commercial areas. (Not the malls or segregated big shopping districts, they are usually less openly inclusive) Good luck!

[@Invalidcas]

another thing that confuses me a lot about the homophobic parents who say "dont teach my kids about gay, because that'll turn them gay" is they say a lot that they just dont want the "gay agenda" forced on them- but- then when ally or queer parents talk about raising their kids their own way, they get a lot of hate from the "let parents parent" crowd saying "i can't believe you would teach your children about that" "you're indoctrinating your children" and shit- like... let parents parent, you're so passionate about it-- you have your kids- parent your kids- let other parents parent their kids wtf- they're also the type to say "it takes a village" when they try to parent other people's kids in ways the parents dont like- why dont they keep that energy when someone teaches their kids something they "dont like" ?? its fuckin stupid

[@RyanAveryIsGay3]

same, it doesn't make sense

[@Tired.c]

Also to point out that we, as a society, grew up with a heteronormative education. Princesses marrying and kissing Princes, learning about straight sex ed, etc. And let me say.. I'm still fuckin queer! Like..??? And just because a class learns about war and the Holocaust doesn't mean the kids are suddenly going to turn into Hitler. It's really stupid, like you said

[@EmeraldsQuartzLight]

It's hard for me to vibe with a lot of gay people because they are extroverted.

[@Tired.c]

​@@EmeraldsQuartzLight there's a LOT of queer people that are introverted too because the majority of us are neurodivergent 😭 You probably see them less because well.. Y'know Anxiety and shyness around meeting and befriending people

[@Invalidcas]

@@EmeraldsQuartzLight forgive me, but i don't understand what that has to do with my comment-? is something wrong on my end? im confused- sorry lol

[@twixyDaemon]

22:32 I really love this being pointed out because I’m a queer trans man and I use the term pansexual because it really doesn’t matter to me what a person is so much as who they are. But, my attraction to women is through a very sapphic lense and my attraction to men and other people varies by the day and experience. So while pan definitely works for an overall quick sum, it’s not the full extent of how my attraction works. Tbh my attraction and preferences are as fluid as my gender expression and that’s as solid as a slinky.

[@alliesakat]

feeling this as a fellow pan-but-it's-more-complicated 💜

[@emoth.cupcake]

Sry, can you maybe explain more?? I don't wanna be rude but the label lesbian is not the vibe/style of the attraction, str8 man can feel attraction the like, soft feminine way too and it does not mean he is a lesbian?? Someone who identifies as man can't be lesbian, it crushes the whole label, if ur nb and you love another nb they also call it lesbian for some reason?? I mean if u wanna use labels then don't break them for the others who may wanna use them. At this point i fell like everyone can call themselves lesbian and it would be true by some queer ppl

[@loureedpipes]

​​​@@emoth.cupcake But labels aren't being broken by some people using them differently. Some people are using them to describe their very specific experience; it doesn’t nullify its overall definition. People that use a certain label are saying they identify with the original definition in some way. Maybe not in its fully original way, but in a way that makes sense to them. Re: using the term lesbian or sapphic specifically - many cis and trans straight men experience attraction to women in ways that relate to their experience with gender. The way sapphic women experience attraction can be distinct in its own way. Someone that identifies as sapphic may just have more in common with that experience, and use the label to describe themselves I kind of view it as identifying a specific niche/vibe of how you experience gender or attraction

[@nobodyshekatonchires]

I wanted to be a transformer, but the universe mistook that as transgender

[@Indigo_Shard]

One word ✨Cosplay✨

[@imkyledude]

Hi there again all👋 I'm just here to remind you that someone loves you... know that this stranger on the internet truly cares about you. You deserve happiness and love. I'm proud of you always and hope you're doing well

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

Howdy Kyle! [Even though we did just chat in the other newer video you had commented on], it's [still] good to see you, little dude :P \(^^)/

[@imkyledude]

​@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd lol you reminded me to come over and put a comment on this one- good to see you too dude :3

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

@@imkyledude Hehe I figured as much :P

[@iamnotcreative8774]

i find it super cool that you add the creators pronouns and where to find them! thats super awesome!!

[@amokiwithmarshclamsoup]

watching this as a trans guy who has really dang bad period cramps right now :,(

[@frademartinmodolado]

I'm sorry bro, I hope the cramps went away or at least got better

[@amokiwithmarshclamsoup]

@@frademartinmodolado thank you, they're definitely better now and I really hope they go away soon 🙏🙏

[@cynical8330]

I'm sorry that you have to deal with that, that really sucks. Stay strong and confident in your idnetity no matter what. Have a big hug and feel better 🤗 :3

[@Indigo_Shard]

Bro I'm not a trans man but I'm on my period too and power to you my brother in cramps :(

[@amokiwithmarshclamsoup]

@@Indigo_Shard thank you :) I wish you well too, no matter who you are period cramps fucking suck 🫂/p

[@existing_kinda-p8f]

I’m watching this right now because I just got harassed. A girl harassed me because of a pronoun pin on my jacket, she told me that it’s a sin to use neopronouns and that she can’t even associate herself with me. She genuinely just made me cry but watching back this video made me feel better.

[@kai_the_enby_guy]

Oh damn, that sounds like it sucked. I hope you feel better now❤

[@she_didnot]

just came out to my parents. They support!

[@TheDorkEvilOne]

I'm also a lesbian & I can only imagine whether a man might be attractive if I think about what a gay man might hypothetically like. Most of the time I do not get what other people see.

[@gooogooogaaagaaa]

My gander has been transed

[@Great_Atuin]

Congratulations on your new goose 👏

[@gooogooogaaagaaa]

@@taki7546 why?

[@emisthem6562]

Untitled Trans Goose Game

[@hellolithy]

​@@gooogooogaaagaaa I think a gander is a group of geese (or maybe just one goose) but I dunno I didn't check.

[@Indigo_Shard]

@@hellolithy I'm pretty sure a gander is a male goose idk I didn't check

[@tailgaity]

WE ARE LADY PARTS IS SO GOOD EVERYONE GO WATCH THAT SHOW RIGHT NOW!!!!!

[@ANXIETY_DEFENDERRR]

I LOOOOOOOVE THE LAST ONE

[@Ryan1234-t9p]

3:15 it aint even 3 am yet its 2 am

[@knowledge_leaf]

21:10 I myself am some sort of non-binary, genderfluid, something or other, and interact a lot in the sapphic community I can certainly agree on the point of trans men being welcome to hang out and vibe in the lesbian community (in my subjective experience, I am also in specifically trans inclusive spaces), trans men need those inclusive spaces and just cause they transition doesn't make them any less welcome all of a sudden. Though, I could certainly see a case for trans men moving off to other queer pastures so to speak. There are spaces for trans people, and it doesn't have to be a trans thing, you could just be there as a straight man who's super cool and all that, if you didn't wanna be out as trans to everyone. Trans men being attracted to women, not wanting to identify with straight is in my opinion fine, but I feel like there are far more fitting labels than lesbian for that, for example, just "Queer" I personally have never known any lesbians that date trans men, but I'm sure it could happen, but on a consistent basis I have not a clue. I myself like a trans man, and on days I am feeling more "woman" on the genderfluid spectrum I go through, I consider our attraction to eachother to be straight, so does he. Everyone has their own ways of viewing the world and expressing themselves, but I don't know. Sometimes binary trans people do need a bit of help over binary cis people, but I don't know, it does feel a little strange to have men identifying as lesbian, I feel like an alternate label would better suit. Oh and by no means am I saying This Is The Way It Is I'm not understanding the argument for it I guess, if the argument is that it doesn't have to make sense then fine I just don't like it and we can disagree. But if there Is a logical way to explain it, I really wanna know so I can spread the correct information when I talk about this stuff.

[@Robb3636]

To be honest I agree, as a trans man myself, I wouldn't tell a trans man that he can't use the term lesbian, but in terms of utility, lesbian as a term going from being used to mean women/people partially identifying as women/along that spectrum/femme people, attracted to the same group I just mentioned, going to also mean: men who are attracted to women and women who are attracted to men, and even men attracted to other men? Because trans men are men, even if we say this term only applies to trans men and not cis men. I feel like we've cast the net really far at that point, and we have other terms that could be used for that. It especially doesn't help when there are (so many) trans men who get called lesbians because people don't think they're men, or lesbians who wish people would stop thinking they're interested in dating men (as even seen in this video).

[@Deviousjackson]

I just wanna say that these videos make my whole day and thanks for posting them

[@Catsgirl32]

I must admit, I can not wrap my head around trans men being able to be lesbian... It does make sense that their relationship is inherently queer rather than straight, especially if their social circles are lesbian. But Idk it's something I struggle with myself too, cause I'm non binary and I'm not sure how to feel about dating lesbians (I'd like to but I'm afraid they will just percieve me as a girl). So it's definitely smth internalised for me... That being said, I would never go out of my way to harass a trans man who identifies as lesbian - I may not understand but queerness can be very complicated and confusing, it'd be hypocritical if I did :')

[@n00n3ynight]

I think I get your point. Maybe it'll help to take a deep dive into queer history, lesbian history and just read and watch a lot of information. There are some interesting accounts on instagram I think. And, if it's still up, a documentary of Leslie Feinberg on KZbin.

[@loup4119]

Great vid, thank you for adding all pronouns and so many ressources ! Very useful work, that also adds joy to our lifes 🏵️

[@Nova-_-]

23:30 I'd never really thought about it like that actually... like ever since coming out i've been like 'yeah he/him lesbians exist' but yeah new learning is happening i guess

[@hugzz_1]

you can’t trans my gender I already did >:]

[@Lucifersfursona]

Amab/afab conversation is actually incredible and also how I feel about myself. It IS used as a shorthand to keep tabs on trans and nonbinary peoples’ organs and body shapes within the binary. I’d literally never thought about it like that before but the second she started talking it was like a light turning on 21:11 I’m not entirely ready for this first conversation yet and am feeling myself be reactive as a transmasc NB, and that’s okay. It’s good actually that there are trans men who are attracted in full or in part to women and femmes who feel eminently safer in lesbian spaces, just because I fully don’t doesn’t mean others experiences don’t or can’t exist. My understanding of my own gender need not and generally cannot apply to anyone but myself, that’s beautiful. The language of it triggering the same part of my brain that feels like it’s being shoved back into cis womanhood in a terf lesbian capacity is a part responding from pain and of self preservation, but others’ lived experiences aren’t an attack on my selfhood. I am happy for trans men who don’t feel the same caged in fear and SH of being in lesbian spaces, it means that aspect of their lives has been kinder to them. I don’t want the cost of my world view being affirmed to be more people having gone through the traumas I have experienced as someone who tried their best to be a lesbian before I realized I was trans (and m/nb4m/nb) and was in abusive relationships that leave the concept of myself being viewed as a potential partner for a lesbian person feeling hostile and violating. The idea there are even within the binary framework hundreds of different forms of “man” and “woman” recognized (though hastily grouped together and all constantly invalidating each other in the context of trying to find “the One True thingness of the thing” these systems are so obsessed with) isn’t new information to me, and it’s not new information that other trans men are within the sphere of trans masculinity and manhood, fully different genders than I am or ever will be. It’s important to give yourself space to examine not only your own reactivity but where it comes from and why you’re reacting- and if you even believe in how you’re reacting. I still feel my heart rate spike when they talk using the specific words “trans male lesbians” for the shorthand of describing concepts and identities I already fully know to be true and vast. English as a language built primarily with these cultural systems already in tow is a reactive and murky one, I am happy I have an understanding of my own praxis that allows me to move through the first layerings of words and into how they’re being used to mean multiple things, and how people are doing our best in this shared language with the few words we have- English lacks a lot of wording for our more human concepts. This was good.

[@Nightmaremarshmellow5614]

WE MAKING TRUMP SUPPORTERS ANGRY WITH THIS ONE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🗣️🔥🗣️🗣️🔥

[@IamPEELYjjaffa]

Jokes on you my gender has already been Transed

[@BombusADHD]

Why this video specifically giving me the confidence to start identifying as a lesbian again,,,,,, cuz my attraction to women is sooo queer but im a trans man so ive been id-ing as bi/cassromantic grrrghhh its midnight lmao

[@Indigo_Shard]

May I ask what is cassromantic?

[@BombusADHD]

@@Indigo_Shard “Cassromantic is an identity where one feels that one is indifferent to the idea of romanticism, and believes it is not an important part of their identity.”

[@Indigo_Shard]

@@BombusADHD Oh ok cool

[@Jayvik_Viktor]

I KNOW ITS ONE AM BUT I DONT WANT TO SLEEPPPP

[@reyreybaebae]

wow. all the tiktoks in this video were especially great! thanks for sharing :)

[@minalovescats5220]

25:30 This reminds me of something I've seen discussed that I really agree with. Gender dysphoria comes from the difference between how we expect our gender to look/act/be and how we look/act/be. So if we had a perfect world there weren't expectations around what a certain gender should look/act/be like, there wouldn't be gender dysphoria. So having dysphoria doesn't define being trans. Someone can be trans without dysphoria.

[@miguelteixeira5201]

speak for yourself. Dysphoria would only disappear if it didn't exist sex or differences in sex. For me, my gender identity it's completely fine, but not my sex. I would still desire a male body. It's not "gender expectations" that make me feel awful about the feeling of being in this body. Dysphoria it's not like being fat in a world that the beauty standart it's skinny, it can't be fixed just by destroying "gender".

[@olivesherwood]

You can have euphoria infiormed trans identities, for sure!

[@kissferenc353]

At 19:00 the shoelace belt is a Vibe, for real.

[@N1ghtW0lfEcho]

3:15 IT LITERALLY TURNED TO 3:00 AM AS THIS VIDEO CAME ON LIKE 😭 YOU DID NOT NEED TO ATTACK ME THIS WAY

[@ykluhs]

3:15 ..It's 4:44 am.. (I was procrastinating and I have to do this or I'm cooked in my own self hatred)

[@Emma-Maze]

18:10 I disagree/can't relate to the issue with the afab/amab terminology but that might be because my friends and I are a bit older now and take genuine pride in being not just the gender we are, but explicitly in being trans, we feel no need to distance ourselves as much as possible from every single little thing that could "tie" us to the gender we were assigned at birth because the reality is we are trans and that *is* always going to be a part of our identity, and a part which we celebrate.

[@Emma-Maze]

I'm silly and commented before I understood she only takes issue with cis people using the acronym and throwing it around casually and I now understand a little bit better where she's coming from, even though I've never heard any cis person use these acronyms, mostly they have no clue what it is and once you tell them they're like "oh okay cool" and forget again, it never seems to really enter their vocabulary xD And my original point still stands, a cis friend using afab casually to describe me just wouldn't faze me because I know who I am, they know who I am, I'll always be trans and I'm happy with that.

[@minalovescats5220]

Based on what she said in that tiktok, I'm going to use amab/afab with the same grammar I would use for the full phrase. As in, "She was AMAB" instead of "She is AMAB"

[@jaspercat6407]

0:40 how is brosephine getting misgendered? She looks like you’d see her on the cover of a Sears magazine.

[@geeksdo1tbetter]

Thank you for all this joy!

[@Life_On_Paws-Therian]

2:20 so real though, and creens give me life

[@aintnowayweresketchy]

4:22 realll, my bsf is trans and I just use his preferred pronouns when talking about him instead of going around telling everyone

[@Arlo-is-dead]

4:47 as a (trans) boy who’s writing a book with a wlw plot line: I promise not to (chat I’m not even attracted to women)

[@KieranHasNoLife]

Wow! I love your videos and you need to get more credit for all the things you do!

[@theultimatesilli]

7:09 that's such a genius app!! :DD

[@andrewbennett7178]

BRB, immediately dl-ing Everywhere is Queer

[@Axolotl_e]

4:41 is it just me or does that sound like danny motta?? am i crazy??

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

I can kinda hear it Lol How are you doing today? (^^)

[@Axolotl_e]

@@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd i think i'm doing okay, could be better tho, hbu?

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

@@Axolotl_e I hope things are able to make a turn for a better if possible /sincere (if you want to and feel comfortable doing so, you're more than welcome to talk with me about what could help make your day better /sincere) I'm doing alright myself :)

[@Axolotl_e]

@@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd tysm! i think/hope my day will get better :D good to hear your day's going well tho :D /gen

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

@@Axolotl_e Yw :) And thank you (^^)

[@nightlight-nuisance2971]

23:00 this one took me a while to wrap my head around so if her video didnt help you out or your still confused He/him lesbians exsist, the sinple sxplination is pronouns dont = gender, pronouns are chosen by people usualy because the feel/sound right if you use neopronouns or they/them this dosent automaticaly make you non binary its just non binary/genderqueer people twnd to use them more Trans male lesbian, now i am not a lesbian i dont identify as lesbian however i have been around them and let me tell you lesbian is as much a sexuality and attraction as it is a vibe, if your a trans male but love a woman/ womaan aligned or nb person chances are you are more likley to love them the way a lesbian loves a woman and not the way a cis/stright man loves a woman, the culture is very different so some may chose to identify as lesbian Also if your genderfluid or have some other gender fuckery going on lesbian may be part of your identity, if yohr part of a system that has female/nb alters you may identify as a lesbian Queer identites are as much decriptions as they are vibes they are not as ridiged and solid as their cis/stright/monogamus counterparts Healing from this will take time and it may be uncomfortable but you can do it 💙

[@rainways7586]

13:52 this is incredible!! Can’t wait to watch it!!

[@icanseeu5190]

3:15 made me jump and its literally 3:30am 😭

[@somedoginaparka]

21:10 hey, can someone help me understand this better? i am struggling to understand this argument myself as an autistic trans dude (who is pansexual, *i am not a lesbian myself*!) and i mean absolutely no harm in any way. ***i don't want to invalidate people's way of living or how they view things, i simply want to learn and understand*** ❤ i think the reason i am struggling to understand this is mostly because what the term "lesbian" refers to. i always thought that lesbian meant "wlw/nmlnm" (women loving women, or non-men loving non-men), so wouldn't that *not* include trans men? i think if someone were to say this about cis men, it would be so heavily critiqued, because "he's a man, he can't be a lesbian!" even though trans men are ALSO men. i also see absolutely nothing about trans women being gay (specifically mlm/nwlnw gay, not the umbrella term), as again, people would say the same thing, because trans women are WOMEN, and that label specifically doesn't involve women. i'm trying to make this make sense if i could, i'm sorry if it sounds confusing or hateful in any way. i just want to understand best to my abilities. the individual in the video stated that lesbian trans men have existed for a long time and are still men, which didn't really change anything before moving on to the topic about non binary people not being seen as trans (which is a completely different conversation, and i support it) so it doesn't completely make sense to me. i am sorry once again if this seems insensitive or hateful in any way, i just want to understand. thank you to anyone who is able to help ^^ and of course, on top of that, please don't let other people's way of thinking stop you from identifying with what you're happy with. just because i don't understand it doesn't mean you aren't allowed to use whatever labels you want, in the end i don't know you, you don't know me, and we're just people tryna live on the same planet. -a very confused trans guy

[@gremlinsunited2433]

I’m going to make a video on this subject because after listening to much conversation about it, doing historical research, and reading some queer theory - I’m pretty sure I have a fairly good understanding of this. To give an incredibly watered down explanation of an abstract concept, it has a lot to do with some of the more radical understandings of queerness and lesbianism, as well as the political and cultural significance of de-centering binary experiences of gender and sexuality. In a simpler sense it also has to do with individual comfort with certain terminology and ways of identifying oneself. I’ll leave it at that for now because I don’t have the time to explain this in full right now, but look out for a video explaining this properly in future!

[@somedoginaparka]

@@gremlinsunited2433 okay, thank you for trying to help me understand :) i appreciate it!

[@Max-by5ow]

op of the videos comment was really good so i dont have much to add other than for some transmasc lesbians (but not all obviously) its an expression of their butchness as butch as a concept is a very complex and varied identity. historically transmasculine butches are very well documented and integral part of queer history ❤

[@Arachnick]

As a fellow autistic trans dude: the way i came to slightly explain it to myself is just: identity is complicated af and sometimes to have round up like numbers ( by definition 4.9 reoccurring isn’t strictly five, but you’re gonna round it because otherwise it’s a hassle) tho i also have alexithymia so i’ve had a lot of struggles with like strictly labelling myself so i think that might be why i understood that over everything else. Not an attempt to say that transmasc lesbians are all confused, want to specify that! Just sometimes you gotta simplify it until it makes sense to other people idk? If i said something wrong please lmk, i’ve tried to find the historical documented ones but it gets buried under “trans men cant be lesbians”(which is personally icky because when did putting strict labels on people work out well?)

[@somedoginaparka]

@@Max-by5ow i appreciate your response, i understand that trans masc people dont exactly mean trans MEN specifically, i have no issues understanding transmasc people being lesbians. just the whole men can be lesbians thing was what i was confused on !! /nm /gen

[@Al_Optimist]

I understand the person at the 21 min mark. Its about trans guys identifiying and lesbians. I am one of them. I say it because i havent medically transitioned. It also doesnt cause me disphoria.

[@LampEater69]

yesss i love that you add the creators pronouns, quite the effort but goes a long way :)

[@Joey-kd8lj]

20:33 is very thought provoking for me as an enby who would describe themselves along with their AGAB. I think AFAB/AMAB can be useful terms for describing experiences that you may have had as your AGAB, but I would say that it is kinda unnecessary (not quite the right word, but close enough) for enby and can be used for transphobic purposes.

[@Spiritofthewild-d9o]

Chase Oliver for LGBT POTUS 2024👍🌈🌈

[@irishjournalgaming]

Does anyone else not like that lesbian and gay are separated? Like, labels are a very personal thing, so they can't really have a specific description and anyone can identify as any label, as long as they are doing so genuinely. But it has always confused me why heterosexuality wasn't separated into two different labels, one for women and one for men, but homosexuality is. Even when I was a young, uninformed, constantly surrounded by homophobia, forced to identify as cishet, child. I didn't get why it wasn't just the same term for both sides. I just think it helps enforce the gender binary, even if you don't use the labels as such. Like, straight means liking the different sex or gender, but lesbian means a woman liking a woman and gay means a man liking a man. As the one tiktok says, that is not always true, but it is how the labels are viewed by most people and with the same idea they were created. Before I knew I was omnisexual, I had the hardest time figuring out whether I was lesbian or gay. If I had already figured out I was bigender at that point, then I think I would've gone insane. If I'm a man and a women but I only like women, or I only like men, what am I? You could just say, don't use a specific label then, but for some reason (neurodivergence) labels are actually REALLY important to me. And, I had never been in any type of queer community before, so I couldn't say I relate to the lesbian or gay community more and use that label either. It would've genuinely really upset me if I couldn't find a label for my sexuality. I remember when I was trying to figure it out, but hadn't yet, I'd just lye silently on my bed crying, because I was so confused, but I NEEDED something, I couldn't just be queer. It hurts when I don't have a label, because then I don't even really know who or what I am. It's not like that for everyone, but it is for me.

[@Cool_cheeseWow-q7u]

Me: ha! I’m going to trans your gender! Friend: wait wha- *friend finds out their pangender* Me: oh- I didn’t know my gender-fluid powers were that strong-

[@AndromedatheBasshead]

love these :)

[@Yellow-s5u5w]

21:06 i don’t mean to be rude… but it’s people like this that make me not understand how trans men can be lesbians. if i go and search what a lesbian is i get something along the lines of a women that’s attracted to another women, and i agree w/ that. They mentioned how trans guys found solace in the lesbian community that these people felt excepted with them, and there’s nothing wrong with that, i feel excepted in many different communities but that doesn’t mean i identify with said community. They also mentioned how trans lesbian men are dating other lesbian women… if these lesbian women are dating these trans MEN doesn’t that mean they either aren’t lesbians or they don’t see their partner as a man and just for what’s in their pants? ive seen video after video of trans people saying that they’ve dated people that where only there for what the biologically had, and how it’s not ok and how it hurt them to be used in such a way way. but then these lesbian trans men are fine with it? also if you identify as trans and have multiple pronouns (example: he/she pronouns) i actually don’t know how that works i just see it as if i see you and think your hot can we date and nothing more. but if im a lesbian (which i am) im not going to come here and date a man just bc they are a male trans lesbian i feel that defeats the purpose of a trans MAN. again this is all an opinion mixed w/ a lot of questions. i’m not to sure on how this works and i’m just sharing my opinion. if sum1 can explain this to me that would be great ☺️ (also: sorry abt the rant i’m just curious and it’s currently 12Am im writing this)

[@H0shik0-l0ve]

4:44 Danny Motta audio! I wasn't expecting that!

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

Hi y'all! It's your local (digitally-so) bi demi dad/friend; how are you all doing this day/night? \(^w^)/

[@jayinatophat]

Hiiiiii what's your favorite book genre? Mines fantasy. I just love it because I can escape from reality, which hasn't been great recently tbh, but I'm getting through it.

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

@@jayinatophat Ooh that's a great question*. Fantasy's pretty good but I'm personally more of a fan of stuff like comics (Marvel/DC) and manga as well as older novels (Dracula, Pride and Prejudice, etc.) :P Also, I'm sorry to hear that reality hasn't been great lately but hopefully it'll be able to make a turn for the better sooner than later /sincere * BTW for when I borrow your question for the "Today's Optional Question", would it be fine with you if I credit you as "jayinatophat" or would you prefer I use something else? /curious

[@jayinatophat]

​@@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd ofc you can use my question! You don't have to credit me, but jayinatophat is fine 🙃

[@Putting_the_Bi_in_Big_Nerd]

@@jayinatophat Alright, thank you :) (and I know I don't "have to" but doing so is the respectful thing to do, is it not? :P) And sounds good :)

[@keyaunna.]

RAHHHHHHHH WE ARE LADY PARTS MENTIONED!!!!!!

[@NotNochos]

Not even 2 minutes in and i feel targeted 😭 ( 1:07)

[@spidersinyourventilationsystem]

yeah. im a trans man and honestly sometimes it really hurts to be called afab 20:13

[@nightlight-nuisance2971]

21:00 besides select freind groups of trans, gender-queer and nb folks it shouldnt be used in a casual setting at all I think its even disrespectful ive never hear of this before, i understand if the jnfo is need to know for whatever reason but cis/stright people dont need to be using it, the way you decribed it sounds like its just a subsitute for male/female and shows they dont respect the person they're talking about

[@soaringspirits2267]

18:12 I was unaware that Amab and Afab were taken out of context. The only time I've seen it used, was in the context are you 'amab'/'afab', which. Really does take it into a new context, huh. I guess I have a grammar update to install.

[@Aceoftheblackspades]

OMFG THE OTHER DAY I WAS HELPING MY DAD DID A TRANSFER CASE FOR HIS TRUCK, AND HE TURNS AND ASKS ME TO HAND HIM THE TUB OF TRANS GEL. I NEARLY DIED BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT. (he is transphobic 😔)

[@jameelarosetafoya2058]

Thank you. When am I gonna be posted up🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️💜🦋

[@TheQueerLeaf]

Yes

[@spidersinyourventilationsystem]

1:20 no but tell me why in the middle of the night when i was 12 i was like “my name, one of the many ive tried out doesnt feel like me. again. wait what if i name myself after a poisonous metal” and now my names mercury ig

[@LokiTheFool]

2:18 why does he sound like Charlie Spring to me 😭 (I mean this in the nicest way possible I love Heartstopper)

[@YourResidentQueer]

The first one is meee

[@Bobbiejoinscore]

Me: *finally stop questioning my sexuality* Boyflux: OH YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO GET AWAY FROM THIS DIDN’T YOU me(AFAB): WAIT- NO- IM NOT A EGG I SWEAR-

[@fractal-dreamz]

afab and currently having a crisis if i’m genderfluid or not 🤩🤩

[@minalovescats5220]

Me too. I get random spikes of gender that I don't normally have. So I'll just have a day where I want to be a boy and I'll cry, and then most of the time I'll feel like I'm somewhere between non-binary and a woman. It makes it very hard to choose a sex to list on my driver's license (where I live, sex on most IDs is self-identified according to your gender). Every option is going to be horribly dysphoric sometimes.

[@lukeflanagan1307]

2:29 This is my radicalism training. It’s good for my soul. So this can’t be time wasted.

[@irishjournalgaming]

16:54 Right after this, I got an ad with Patti Harrison in it!!

[@Arsonist-j2d]

the thing she said about the attraction is like soo true but like i am aroace but i still see people and be like ooh HOT AS FUCKKK but i dont want something from them but people are ALWAYS like if you find them attractive it means you like them in a way NO im just saying that they look good or i like their style but i dont want anything from them

[@MHE202]

My gender has been trans'd

[@cynical8330]

We desperately need to normalize pronouns when we.introduce ourselves to people, it's the only way to make sure everyone feels included. I don't want to have to be asked, it should just be an unspoken rule that you don't know until I tell you when I say my name. Even so, I feel awkward infroducing mtself with my pronouns to cis people; but if normalizing this will help cis people be more inclusive I will deal with as much discomfort from awkard feelings as I have to. Stay positve everyone I love you all so much ❤ Edit: The rant about AGAB terms as words is too real. I'm so angry how this has played out in our lexicon. She's right, I'm not AMAB I *was* AMAB. I'm a woman, don't even worry about the trans part, I am a woman end of story.

[@Temu_.Carson]

Oml so true! Everytime I meet someone new I usually ask for their pronouns and preferred name if they're comfortable! Once I get to know them it's a known thing to use this name and those pronouns for them.

[@Bone_crisis]

Can I gender my fluid?

[@oreocookies5846]

Oh no I’m transed 😮

[@CloudiiSky1]

I’m a transmasc lesbian :D

[@mistydragonfan1008]

Awh man,Trump won D: How the hell will we have women's rights and gay rights now-

[@TheBigJayAgenda]

Exactly

[@shenaniganstuff]

3:03 ...

[@STARZ_TheTherian6]

1:10 lol that used to be me

[@AW-sx8hm]

I don't get the balloon ones but the compilation is very cute ❤

[@ImNotCreativeEnoughToMakeUser]

0:49 Me fr (im barely able to hold on to my relationship :,/)

[@miguelteixeira5201]

I actually don't agree with the last person (which is fine, it's good that we have differences in thinking). In my point of view, you can identify whatever you want, but this isn't always turning to a right assumption. People makes mistakes, people sometimes don't have the knowledge and sometimes people are wrong, simple as that. Can a cis man be a lesbian? No. He can't. Because lesbianism is very much men exclusionary. If you agree with me that cis man are just as EQUAL man as a trans man, then you come to the conclusion: they can't be lesbians. "But some trans men found comfort in lesbian's spaces and-" well, what about it? I am a man who likes men, and I'm confortable being around girls and doing girly stuff, but I am not a girl, I'm wouldn't consider myself even a femenine man. "Some trans men still have relationships with lesbian women" well, unfortunately they do not see them as men. If they did, they wouldn't even consider being with them, because lesbians don't date men.

[@lampsonspmals2]

as a trans woman, i agree

[@minalovescats5220]

I don't have an opinion on this, but I do find it interesting because it connects to history. In the first lesbian communities that existed, trans men were a big and generally well-accepted part of those communities.

[@miguelteixeira5201]

@@minalovescats5220 history it's not something still, stationary, it evolves. something that was a thing in the past can be questioned in the future and should be. Makes me feel ill that this is even in debate. Lesbians don't date men, lesbians aren't men. Do you really think in that time those people view trans men as men? Can you, in the bottom of your heart, affirm that they were seem as men and not very masculine women? Just feels transphobic to even think that this is right in any way.

[@E_TheCreature]

I love the title so much "To trans your gender" lol. I'm already trans

[@untitledproductions644]

This is why I don’t want to explain my gender to people because in regards to masculinity I can relate to more to a tomboy than a cisguy

[@peachydoodles]

Bro yes my sleep schedule is fucked I'm fixing it I'm part way through an alnighter

[@Skylikesavation]

18:10 good point

[@Rose_44479]

7:29 I couldn't figure out how to buy stuff plus I don't have money 😭😭😭

[@Stick_and_stone]

OMG THEY HAVE DANNY MOTTA AUDIO

[@AshR42IsAll]

IMO, in a perfect world that doesn't exist and likely will not exist for a long time (if ever -- but maybe that's just my pessimism talking), being straight would not exist. There would be a term for people that like girls, a term for people who like guys, and then all the other terms that are already out there that don't pertain to sexuality in direct relation to the gender of the person experiencing the attraction. Obvs culture would have to change a LOT for it to work, but... Thoughts?

[@saturnxoxo01]

1:15 EZZZZZ

[@irishjournalgaming]

I'm fucking fuming, the ONE tiktok with a Danny Motta audio is the same one KZbin decided to put a fucking GLOOPY DOOPERSON AD RIGHT AFTER, AGAIN! I ain't even heard of wuthering waves before, but I do now one of their characters is gloopy dooperson and that there ads suddenly only appear when fucking Danny Motta is in the house!!!

[@da_clumsy__caterpillar]

1:15 mine is rory

[@teh.1keaShark]

thank you for transing my she her

[@selthafour6948]

Why include the tiktok logo after each one?