LGR - Adventures of Ninja Nanny - PC Game Review

FRESH OATS. FRESH OATS. FRESH OATS.
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● Music used in order of appearance:
"Beachfront Celebration Latinesque" by Kevin MacLeod
kzbin.info...
And if for some reason you want to download this thing...
archive.org/details/ninja-nan...

[@brutalmoose]

Fresh oats....

[@FlintG]

+brutalmoose SNORT!!

[@themarcshark]

+brutalmoose I was just about to say that this video reminds me of the style that you do yours in haha

[@fastbreak333]

+brutalmoose I was just thinking about Bad Milk when I was watching this. This game makes Bad Milk look like King's Quest.

[@pushinguproses]

+brutalmoose COOOOW?

[@carlz0r]

+fastbreak333 Made me think of Bad Milk, too.. just the sheer weirdness of the video sequences.

[@pushinguproses]

Drugs. That is all.

[@FlintG]

+PushingUpRoses Yup lmao.

[@JefOliveira90]

Drugs on drugs.

[@MrYaotubo]

+PushingUpRoses Kickstarter for "Adventures of ninja nanny 2"? :)

[@JefOliveira90]

I'm in.

[@idnyftw]

+PushingUpRoses I was almost expecting you to cameo up around the end to snap him back into some semblance of normalcy or something like that

[@Tricob1974]

If we really needed a "Don't use drugs" message directed to teenage youth, we didn't need an animated TV special to get the point across. We just needed this program released to the masses.

[@MatteoTomatto]

This game is like 'Plumbers Don't Wear Ties' for children.

[@niveknomad2008]

Mathew Viggiani so fucking true

[@isaacsorensen8377]

Rated E 10+

[@IsmailofeRegime]

Nah, Plumbers Don't Wear Ties may be terrible and stupid, but I don't think players would be utterly lost like they are with this game. If an adult can't comprehend what's going on, how could a child?

[@GarArtStudios]

Best part: it's 4:20pm the entire way through the video.

[@ThatWeirdoWhoMakesVideos]

Well guess the developers loved blazing there mary janes.

[@RoiDatBoi]

Garrett Williamson happy 4/20 ya'll!

[@NNoradIV]

That is probably the only way to "enjoy" this game. Being stoned makes you laugh all the way through.

[@kwando472]

Smoke it.

[@budakbaongsiah]

Kwa ndo Graze those fresh oats, man.

[@Cubivore10]

This looks like the type of game that exists only as screenshots to accompany a poorly written creepypasta.

[@DEASTESMusic]

+MonsterMasher The bit with the brain was definitely very creepypasta-esque

[@lincolnmiller4757]

Seven days after you play this, you mysteriously die.

[@kris_0520]

Clearly not! It has been *10 years* since LGR started and *4 years* since this video was uploaded.

[@samless782]

@@kris_0520 who's says clint wasn't replaced by his clone.

[@GLOW3524]

This isn't a game. It's a portal into some poor soul's descent into madness.

[@dickhuntz6962]

I can't be the only person that thinks this is actually a psychological horror game, right?

[@DyranLK]

No, that is a very valid interpretation. To say the least, lol.

[@joshuat6124]

You are not alone. I find almost all the graphics and sound effect pairings utterly terrifying.

[@lincolnmiller4757]

The voiceovers creep me out, so there's some weight to your opinion.

[@TheCivildecay]

If I had this game, I would be pretty scared to play it :)

[@BenGrem917]

Fresh oats. Freeesh oats. Freeeessssh oaaaats.

[@itaybron]

this is the kind of game you'd usually see on ross's game dungeon

[@LGR]

I'd love to see Ross cover this.

[@517342]

+Lazy Game Reviews You know what would be awesome? If you guys worked on something together. I wish...

[@CitizenKanevideos]

+517342 Ross' and Clint's Lazy Game Dungeon. It'd be a dream come true.

[@Brunosky_Inc]

This is something that I *have* to see Ross covering at some point.

[@iCach0]

So, the clock jumps from 6:05 to 4:20 the moment you open the program, and doesn't change for the entire video... very interesting. Hypothesis: this software has the power to teleport you to a dimension where it's always 4:20. This may help explain the mental state of the "developer" when he/she made this.

[@trippcailean9594]

does lgr smoke weed

[@QophSilrahq]

It wasn't even the program, though; it was only the folder containing it.

[@TheNostalgiaMall]

You should've played this with the sexy mouse.

[@Penoatle]

@Random Videos by Sunlitspace542 Still around: kzbin.info/www/bejne/oGq4fZeil5tmfZo Hope the last year has been kind.

[@TheAverageAnarchist1]

Ha! 5:08 Funny thing is that emperor Norton was a real guy from San Francisco who claimed himself to be the emperor of america. He had his own currency and everything that was accepted at local establishments. ALL HAIL EMPEROR NORTON!

[@jogiff]

And Baghdad by the Bay is an affectionate nickname for San Francisco (though it has fallen from favor since Saddam Hussein).

[@theallknowingsause8940]

I was expecting him to look more like the Sam O' Nella drawing

[@wesleybcrowen]

This isn't even parody or satire on edutainment games.. this is pure "DaDa."

[@pureicefire]

WesleyB Crowen I thought of Dada the moment this started!

[@TheRealLazerBlazer22]

DaDa?

[@colonthree]

TheRealLazerBlazer22 Dadaism. :3c

[@sandakureva]

I haven't heard about Dadaism since college... but this definitely fits the bill.

[@sandakureva]

@@TheRealLazerBlazer22 Dadaism is a sort of post-ironic humor.

[@FrkyFrenchFryFriends]

You could be a voice actor, dude. The voices you do in this episode made me wonder for a moment if it was coming from the game or not.

[@Trelior]

He does do voice acting. Occasionally. He's credited as Duke Nukem in Gas Guzzlers Extreme.

[@xxxBURSTANGELxxx]

True

[@gizho6493]

I was confused too at moments 😅

[@Boxguy21x]

Ninja Nanny sounds like my kinda job. Just imagine Mary Poppins using a sword umbrella and blinding her enemies with sugar

[@BubblewrapHighway]

Mary Choppins.

[@restlessDSM]

Days later Clint was found wandering the woods, muttering "Ninja Nanny's not a ninja" over and over.

[@8bits59]

tragic. 😞

I have yet to watch a video from LGR and not have fun. You're awesome and your collection is impressively abundant in weirdness.

[@LGR]

Thank you, I'm glad you're enjoying!

[@RiceMan9315]

Man, I had no idea they sold viruses in PC big boxes.

[@isaacsorensen8377]

Mental viruses.

[@CeasiusC]

Silicon Alley, seems about right. Psst kid, you wana buy an educational game? *flashes open trench coat*

[@boltblackjoker]

This is officially the weirdest piece of entertainment media I have ever seen, considering the era of its release. Nowadays any number of awful indie studios can put out a creepypasta but this... Is something totally different.

[@LeatherIceCream]

im gonna pray tonight.

[@GentleHeretic]

Ninja Nanny, or "Why Nobody Likes MS Paint anymore". Was this sold by some crazed programmer in a back alley, desperate for a small coin to feed his addiction to cheap booze and heroin? I'm almost afraid to find out the story behind this. Could be used to make a good Candle Cove trollpasta, though.

[@littlebaron5573]

Jacob Smith this is what you get from ‘kahjiit has wares if you have coin’ and then buy something.

[@MusicMan32K]

Cow? Cow? Did someone...mention a cow?!

[@doopdoop1601]

Watching this, you can feel his pain. You can feel him breaking. *You feel yourself breaking with him*

[@BeetleBungs]

This game would've scared the shit out of me as a kid

[@raptortim]

Did you guy's notice that the system time was always 4:20 pm

[@halyomorpha]

+zeldajunkielol2 SNORT

[@noelcase9568]

I noticed that too.

[@CatFace8885]

That would be appropriate.

[@foxymetroid]

So this is basically KZbin Poop before there was even a KZbin to KZbin Poop on with the addition of unrelated educational content that's more interesting than the main "story".

[@xFlareLeon]

Don't lump YTP in with this. YTP is funny, this is... I dunno WHAT this is!

[@crescentfresh8001]

I, uhh... need to lie down. And I must own a copy. Two copies. Seventy copies. Fresh oats. Ninety-eight copies.

[@flindangle3100]

the fact you think a naked hippo is strange really shows how this game messes with ones brain

[@JennyverseLive]

Someone should immediately re-form this company and fund them as much money as they like to make next-generation games. I demand it.

[@aslothatemypie]

Tis truly a masterpiece of surrealist art. That MS-Paint, that Word Art, they even use Microsoft Sam! Is there nothing this game does not do? It should be kept on display at the London Tate Museum.

[@rommix0]

Microsoft sam didn't exist in the 90s.

[@daemonspudguy]

​@@rommix0yes it did.

[@rommix0]

@@daemonspudguy No it did not. It existed since the early 2000s. Prove to me it existed in the 90s then.

[@daemonspudguy]

@@rommix0 1999's Windows 2000 used Microsoft Sam as the default text to speech voice for Microsoft Narrator. 1999 is before the early 2000s.

[@daemonspudguy]

@@rommix0 the Microsoft Speech API version 4.0 was released in 1998. The default voice used for it in the SDK is Microsoft Sam. All of this can be learned through a quick Google search.

[@alicetechtipsytp6250]

Lol youtube recognized the game as "Extreme Sports with the Berenstain Bears" (at least for me)

[@Kane615]

Anyone who needs proof that games are art need look no further than this masterpiece.

[@SipeFilmi]

Oh man, I could go for some ultra chocolate zombie right now.

[@LGR]

Mmm, I'll have an Ultra Chocolate Zombie with a sprinkling of domestic pig dispute, please.

[@sjhaas]

Would they top it with some fresh oats?

[@LazerLord10]

"It's interesting writing for reasons that probably aren't good."

[@liamh1982]

See, kids? This is why you should not mix absinthe, LSD, quaaludes and horse tranquilisers.

[@MaxineAndrew]

I have no words. You've discovered a gem, LGR. Must've been game of the year, certainly. Your dedication to produce such a good review out of this is admirable.

[@uncaaj6242]

I have a game called Spelvin Goolie, Private Eyeball that is almost just as far fetched as this.

[@uncaaj6242]

spookanide Perhaps for Edutainment Month...

[@romajimamulo]

BlueJay Films did you send it?

[@uncaaj6242]

The game is still in my possession. I may want to make my own video on it, or maybe I will still send the game to LGR. We'll see what happens.

[@simplylogan93]

6:20 -- I'm positive that the horse's snoring is a sound clip of either a lawnmower or low-flying airplane xD

[@Crusader1089]

I don't understand why this doesn't have 10 times the views. Easily one of the best LGR episodes.

[@farmhousemedia3000]

There is something going on here that's bigger than all of us!

[@vali6717]

This... This game, thing... What the blazes have I been watching?! I would say I'm confused but that implies that there is a way to comprehend this.

[@lowlifestyle]

4:20 p.m. is the longest minute ever.

[@tomysshadow]

Nihilfist He played it for one minute every day so he didn't overdose. This video took months.

[@whocare9942]

It's 2019 and every time I want oatmeal all my brain will supply is "fresh oats"

[@MarurunLEB]

This is like if SWERY were asked to make a game demo about a fictional wikipedia from early 90s that has all kinds of bizarre interaction, but was only given a few days to make it. Much like a train wreck in slow motion, it's a disaster that is somehow intriguing.

[@littleNorwegians]

Wow, and the old Windows 95/98 stuff like the pixelated bitmaps, word-art, buttons and fricking video player just adds to it. What confuses me, as a developer, is I know this stuff takes at least some time to do. Like, it takes more than one insane tangent to get this sorta thing made. I am so curious how this happened. Great obscure find. Would never have known about it, if not for you.

[@LGR]

Yeah, I would _love_ to know what went into making this! But of course, information on this and the company are insanely scarce.

[@darkmage07070777]

+littleNorwegians Not to mention the packaging, bulk cd manufacture and distribution! It doesn't look like a shareware game I've ever seen, so somebody had to have helped them put this on store shelves!

[@b4ux1t3-tech]

"Like, it takes more than one insane tangent to get this sorta thing made." Wanna bet? www.templeos.org/

[@WeaselZone]

That was beautiful, thanks for showing this gem!

[@CobaltThunder267]

Is THIS where the "Fresh Oats" came from!!! I forget what other video he used it in, but good Lord, this was a trip

[@Alexaflohr]

When I clicked on this video, I did not expect to look into the Abyss.

[@Backstabber056]

Alexander Abrams-Flohr Did it look back?

[@HissinSpit]

At the beginning, when you were telling us that it wasn't worthy enough to be with the other edutainment games and showed us how you kept it far away from them, I was just like, "Ah, it can't be that bad, LGR. Surely, you must be exaggerating." But now I have witnessed the true quality of...whatever...this is...and will no longer be a skeptic when it comes to your opinions. Great review (as always)! I was laughing confusedly right along with you xD

[@Featherogue]

7 years later and I still come back to this video. Please cover more games like this sometime!

[@Pearcey80]

I know people say this often about all media, but there is no way this is not a result of drugs. That fresh oats screen is too wild.

[@rchcc122]

I found your channel a few weeks ago and I really have enjoyed seeing all the more strange and bizarre games you have. Bizarre things are the best things. Also, I do get unreasonably excited when I can spot a game from my childhood in your collection (at 0:20 I spotted the Detective Barbie game I used to play, as well as Barbie Nail Designer and Hair Styler). I'd love to get a glimpse at your collection, it seems like it would be so much fun to shift through.

[@LGR]

Awesome, I'm glad you're enjoying! I actually have a video showing my full collection here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/l2m6h5-amJmIlZo

[@clickerbait5622]

+Lazy Game Reviews fresh oats

[@Moerp100]

We should tell Joel about this. THIS GAME HAS TO BE STREAMED

[@TheWrightClanX5]

I revisit this vid at least a couple of times a year for the animations - and Clint's descent into madness 😄

[@DARE0451]

The live action footage in this game makes me feel like I'm watching the opening to a snuff film. Fwayrush wouldn't be unfitting to be seen before 3 Guys 1 Hammer.

[@shairyar123]

4:20 PM

[@Onyxthegreat91]

+Slade Cooper Very applicable seeing this "game".

[@pilgrimMj]

You broke Clint. Why did you have to break Clint?

[@alexismercer3965]

fresh oats...fresh oats...

[@plantain.1739]

Alexis Mercer S N O R T S

[@PlebeianGoth]

Is it always 4:20 when you play Ninja Nanny?

[@LGR]

It is a given.

[@SoujiMonaru]

Was this a Tommy Wiseau production? Nothing else would explain this! O_o

[@851852093114208513]

@4:10 - Okay, so the file is called fwayrush, which we can only assume to mean "freeway rush"... But at 4:12 they clearly stop at a toll booth. Major plothole. Entire concept of a cow ninja nanny rendered completely senseless.

[@Serenova]

It was very brave of me to watch this after having surgery. Laughing is painful and yet I can't stop. This game is a trip! And LGR's quip of "I have not done enough drugs to understand this" is even funnier when I'm on pain meds and *I* don't understand this either!

[@williamhayden7711]

This game is GOLD! Pure GOLD! I could definitely see some younger kids and adults and maybe some in between having fun with this. Not the reading part, but the rest yes, absolutely.

[@PumpkinSmasher79]

Looks like something off of Steam Early Access...

[@ianciti]

nah, way too entertaining for that.

[@DijaVlogsGames]

This looks like something someone downloaded off the Dark Net. I find it so hard to believe that this was actually sold in stores. It reminds me so much of Dingo Pictures Animated movies (the dudes who also did the animation for a lot of Phoenix games like "Animal Soccer World") but it's even more trippy....more trippy than Dingo Pictures, which I didn't think was possible.. Thanks for showing this. I can't even tell you how fascinated I am by this game now.

[@TheTotallyRealXiJinping]

This was my favorite game growing up

[@hollyccam]

Why is the origin of this not a big internet mystery. Whang needs to do a video on this

[@janneaalto3956]

I feel like this game is the visual version of the Amigara Fault. THIS GAME! IT WAS MADE FOR ME!! DRR... DRR... DRR...

[@BenRangel]

This actually IS the precursor to youtube-poop

[@palibakufun]

I've watched enough Vinesauce to know a weird game, and not be so... weirded out. But THIS, holy SHIT.

[@yourguysheppy]

I don't know why this video is tagged as Extreme Sports With The Berenstain Bears, but it does make it funnier

[@CyberMoomin]

I imagine a group of programmers were locked in a room, with some computers and a boat load of crack. When they were finally freed this was the result.

[@DaGameTrain]

+Ryan “Zombies” Dixon You mean a boat load of FRESH OATS

[@KaotikKnight]

It's like something you'd find on the deep web.

[@romajimamulo]

KaotikKnight with less bodies

[@nannesoar]

I think this might be the funniest LGR video I've seen yet.

[@firienfeld]

this reminds me of terry gilliam's animations for monty python but like... on a different level of consciousness.. i love it

[@EpicLPer]

Back in the day we didn't have "that section on youtube" but "that section of windows games that make no fucking sense"

[@romajimamulo]

EpicLPer is your icon your OC?

[@RaccoonGrrrl]

Dev. team might be like "Educational? ...Scratch that! let's create 'experimental multimedia art' that would rival Desert Bus and Hong Kong 97 instead"

[@The_Blog]

Completly lost it at 6:30. That stuff is just too great xD

[@JRBlood]

This game should have come with a warning: "Before playing, you must take at least one hit of acid". Wow... just... wow.... Why does it feel like I'm just coming off a trip? :D

[@SpeedySPCFan]

This is the kind of thing that would be released as a $1 indie game and get praised for being abstract art.

[@fanfaretloudest]

I half expected someone somewhere in the "story" to say "My spoon is too big.... mah spoon is too big!"

[@icecreamsamwich]

welp i finally fucking found the origin of "fresh oats" ...i kinda wish i didn't

[@OdaSwifteye]

Fresh Oats has been making the rounds? The Internet makes me proud.

[@oniinu]

LOST FOSSIL Care to share?

[@IbilisSLZ]

No, because it's HIS ultra chocolate zombie ;P.

[@SailorDrew]

Haha, poor Clint. It broke his brain a little. Mine too, Clint, mine too.

[@mcbobbyfresh]

I dont know how I could NOT have fun when your always so upbeat and enjoyable. Thank you LGR for always making my bad days great days.

[@Viehzerrer]

I'd say this game is absolutely random, but that doesn't even begin to remotely convey how random this game is. Some might even call it a masterpiece of surreal art. I call it random, but oddly fascinating, trash. And I love the fact that it was even packaged and published. Shows some real dedication to go all the way. The question is just... why?

[@SomeBorkedAccount]

This video is responsible for me fixing my old film camera. I needed a break from shaking uncontrollably and whispering "fresh oats."

[@chim-chimney]

Mike Hostetler are you gonna film yourself while you sit in the fetal position and whispering “fresh oats”?

[@trainboy1739]

People are asking “what drugs the developers were doing” but not asking the single important question “what dimension were they on?!”

[@rosskwolfe]

This is the Santa Clause and the Ice Cream Bunny of video games.

[@timlwetzel]

WTF EVEN IS THIS?!?!?! I haven't done enough drugs to understand this!! Why is there a naked moose? What the hell is a cow doing becoming a ninja?! WHY?! *brain explodes*

[@AdvanceSockem]

+Timothy Wetzel (KingIsaacLinksr) The cow on the cover is more of a samurai than a ninja. They even fucked that up.

[@rundosrun5432]

+Timothy Wetzel (KingIsaacLinksr) I can explain all of it easily, really. You see, the game is all abouCOOOWWW?!!! DID SOMEBODY SAW COOOWWWWW???!!?!!! *bizarre out of place old timey pictures and sound effects ensue*

[@LukeValentino]

+Timothy Wetzel (KingIsaacLinksr) To be honest, how often do you see a moose with clothes on? p.s. Fresh oats

[@FlyingOverTr0ut]

This is a nightmare just to watch.

[@TheSonicsean]

Interestingly, the only copy on eBay right now has a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT cover art, meaning that there were multiple pressings of this game made :www.ebay.com/itm/No-11-Downing-Street-The-Adventures-of-Ninja-Nanny-Sherrloch-Sheltie-PC-/301814700888?hash=item46458edb58:g:gbUAAOSwxN5WX8sc

[@LGR]

This saddens me.

[@TheSonicsean]

But that one does have screenshots on the back, so maybe it's a wash.

[@Gillymonster18]

+Lazy Game Reviews By watching this video, I have now done acid vicariously.

[@MadameSomnambule]

"Those who appreciate the humor of Monty Python will love this product" Just let that sink in for a moment.

[@creepingnet]

Is Not/Is So sounds like a door slam battle between Mickey Mouse and Mr. Bill. LOL

[@GunShySunshine]

Oh cool, Silicon Alley's one of my favorite shows

[@fl0atpvnk]

Clint, I’ve seen nearly all of your videos but I keep coming back to this one, I believe I’m in my 5th time watching it and it never gets old or unfunny. This is amazing. 👍 God I hope someone makes some sort of sequel or a game that’s inspired by this so you can review it.

[@supertaoman12]

Looks like unhinged, untalented developers making shitpost games aren't unique to today's world.

[@YAUUN]

"What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." Ecclesiates 1:9

[@shaneofthemariofans.7524]

At least toy story storybook game was great

[@DreamcasticChannel]

This game scares me.

[@hanro50]

_LGR.exe has stopped responding_

[@VulpisFoxfire]

And these programmers eventually renamed themseles Digital Homicide? :-)

[@IsmailofeRegime]

Someone needs to do an interview with one of the developers. This isn't a case where some lame development company puts out buggy, low-effort FPS/RPG/whatever games that get put in bargain bins and bought by grandparents for their grandchildren. This really does seem like a bunch of clueless middle-aged educators got together and decided to make an "educational" game without ever having really played other games before, and then including their own unfunny humor in an attempt to keep kids interested even though I'm pretty sure any child who tried to play this would be even more lost than Clint.