Life advice for guys in their 20s (I'm 40)

[@roaringfork]

face of a 25yo, mullet of a 55yo, 40 adds up tbh also happy birthday

[@brockreynolds870]

Honey, that's not mullet. He's had them before, but this isn't it. BTW... when the hair was in style the first time, the word "mullet" didn't exist.

[@pXnTilde]

in the PNW mullets are very in for millennials and older gen-z

[@brockreynolds870]

@@pXnTilde Glad to see them back. They are quite attractive if done right.

[@dekaiaverett9931]

More like 80s mom hair

[@KP-jx4qc]

Mullets are a gen z thing

[@JREG]

thanks old man

[@unextrano9775]

Jreg!

[@lainpilledschizoautist]

Hello Jreg

[@user-qw9yf6zs9t]

thanks reginald

[@clutchmelon4587]

That is really very kind

[@Shahzad-Khan]

You aswell old man

[@lombre9149]

Bro doesnt look 40 he looks like a 30 year old in 1980

[@forthrightgambitia1032]

Not having a wife or kids helps.

[@hucklebucklin]

​@@forthrightgambitia1032 considering he's gay I don't think that was on his mind 😂😂

[@Richard-or2km]

@@hucklebucklin Could still have a hubby and kids.🤔

[@forthrightgambitia1032]

@@hucklebucklin I know. 🤣 The point stands.

[@pizzagroom6221]

JJ really rocks the "80's dad" vibe

[@R3troguy]

You are a whole enigma: collecting habits of a 25 year old anime fan, mullet of a 30 year old lesbian, moustache of a 50 year old uncle, and a fashion sense that lives forever. God bless you

[@brendan-tran]

30 yr old lesbian is crazy

[@tkh9911]

the lesbian part had me dead ☠️

[@R3troguy]

@trevor2102 not even the beach that makes you old?

[@ImNotFine44]

Got that ellen ripley haircut

[@ryan99842]

trying to improve yourself a little every day leads to big results over time. If you're unsure where to begin, I found unveiling your hidden potential by bruce thornwood super helpful

[@Sam_on_YouTube]

Here's advice from a 43 year old, related to one of your points: Embrace being wrong. Celebrate it. That's how you learn. I recently learned at a 6th grade science fair that something I believed and repeated about the history of video games was wrong. That was my favorite project at the fair. If you enjoy it when you are wrong, you will remember the corrections and incorporate them better into your beliefs. I find I'm wrong less and less often. There are TONS of things I don't know. I'm not counting those things. I mean things I actively think are true but aren't. There are fewer and fewer of them over time.

[@JJMcCullough]

Oh yes, and admitting “I don’t know” is very liberating as well. People often expect me to know everything about everything, but I obviously don’t, and your ego has to be able to accept that fact being disclosed before others.

[@Sam_on_YouTube]

@@JJMcCullough Developing some real expertise I think helps. I am now one of the leading experts in the convention process under Article V of the Constitution, recognized as such by most other leading experts. Being secure in my expertise makes it a LOT easier to admit what I don't know both about the topic I study and about pretty much everything else.

[@ashkitt7719]

I'm sure there's a lot I don't know and never will know. And that's okay.

[@rachel_sj]

It’s perfectly fine to answer a question with “I Don’t Know”, but I always add “but, I’m willing to find out an answer to that question!” as I’m someone who loves to research information, ideas, and other things to come up with solutions and prove that I can be indispensable as a colleague or professional (or even a friend looking up something online). That’s how I stay curious and inquisitive and those are traits that definitely keep you from aging faster!

[@tangomango2353]

I'm 17. This makes sense and is very similar to one of my favorite quotes, "to fail faster is to fail forward."

[@zugabdu1]

Speaking of regrets, one thing I'd advise as a 40-something is to be kinder to yourself about them. Regrets are the natural by-prodect of a life lived with imperfect information. Think about how you did the best you could, with what you knew, when you knew it.

[@daimsaeed]

I absolutely should have known better, but hey ho

[@earlbluetea]

One of my good qualities is that I don't really live life with regret. Choices I made were right for me at the time and headspace I was in. I shouldn't judge my past decisions based on the perspective and wisdom I have now. Also, if I did fuck up in the past--rather than dwelling on regret I just learn from it and make sure not to do it again. Honestly I think my anxiety and tendency to overthink has lead me to take this attitude to sort of protect myself from overthinking past decisions.

[@danhle1537]

1724: - The Flying Dutchman 2024: - The Fvcking Dutchman

[@mikloridden8276]

I’d like to add another angle to this. Regret can also be apart of envy due to being limited to things simply due to location and social group available to you.

[@Camothor10]

But i didnt do the best i could

[@tiredox3788]

I'm already exhausted in my 20s because I spend more working than anything.

[@JJreyes3O]

I feel the same. My 20s so far are, work enough to get by and study hard enough to hopefully not have to work myself to the bone to get by in the future.

[@tiredox3788]

@@JJreyes3O Yeah it's stressful honestly. Feels like you not getting away sometimes.

[@ConfusedFlowerPot-ds3gy]

Bidenomics, baby.

[@edwarddorey4480]

Yet you have the time to actively post in the KZbin comment section, curious.

[@tiredox3788]

@@edwarddorey4480 🤨🤨

[@bruhboon3571]

I married and had kids at 21. Now im 29 with a wife and 3 kids. It wasnt my plan as a kid but I am SO grateful for marrying the right person early. We may live in a trailer park but we are happy, and that's all that matters

[@dylant2323]

It's awesome that you'll always be only around 21 years older than your children. You get to raise them while you still have youthful energy and you'll have a longer life with them. You may even get to be a great grandparent. And I'm sure raising a family in your 20s gives you more insight on life that most people around your age don't have

[@audinionkundesu]

Personally I could never. I want to see the world and explore myself before admitting my being to the responsibilities of a parent. That being said, children are a special joy in life and I am jealous! So sad we can’t just pause life and switch places and back all the time 😂

[@UmamiPapi]

You won man. Love is the most important thing and most young folks don’t seem to be getting there.

[@dripgawd1992]

skipped some bs and went straight 4 the jackpot. so many people looking for individual fulfillment before having kids and just end up beig miserable.

[@TheOneMagpie]

​@xyxx566 How what? What home? They just said they live in a fucking trailer park. Might sound insane but it's actually very cheap to have unprotected sex and have someone officiate your wedding without spending $100K on it. They're living a life enriched by love, it's priceless. They'll just unfortunately be punished by the world's economic framework to likely live in poverty or bust an unfathomable amount of ass to get out of it while obligating for three children. I wish them the best, it'll be a fulfilling life.

[@Jessica_P_Fields]

I'm 39 and a woman, but one thing I've found with advice from older people I've actually used through the years is that most of the advice wasn't actually given as advice. A lot of it was just them explaining why they do the things they do, and for whatever reason it resonated with me. I've taken that to heart as I've gotten older, so I try to give clear explanations about why I do what I do, and I don't generally give advice even when I'm asked for it. Hopefully someone will find some value in what I have to offer somewhere. Also: Happy Birthday J.J.!

[@AslanKyoya1776]

It's scary how fast your 20s go, but at the same time, you think that you're young forever. I would know, I'm 30 now, and I could've sworn I was 22 yesterday!

[@JJMcCullough]

Ditto. I feel like my 30s really rushed by. I feel like I went from 27 to 40 overnight

[@Zyo117]

I don't even pay attention to age. I'm uh...28 (legit took me a second to do the math on that) but it's not like being older or younger makes much of a difference. Economically everyone still gets fucked by the rich people these days.

[@alabasterledge]

@@Zyo117 It's a lot easier to think about age that way when your 28 versus 40. And then there's 60, etc.

[@nicholasd3990]

I turned 29 yesterday, It's unbelievable how fast my 20s have gone by

[@Zyo117]

@@alabasterledge I'm part of the generation that doesn't actually expect to make it to retirement age. That said, I've still got my RRSP set up with a company matching contribution. I'll take advantage of that while I can, but my morals also dictate that that money isn't to be invested in private equity, which limits my options but I feel they're more stable than the pump and dump private equity loves 🫠

[@hastaman321]

I'm nearly 27 now and ill be honest, ive never experienced any of this freedom you're talking about. No money for a place to stay, no time to socialize, all opportunities for a better job out of reach. The best i have now is living with my parents out in the middle of nowhere. Don't know if it's just me or if it's common for others in my age group.

[@bigt9745]

very true brother

[@kylem1112]

You're not the only one trust me. All of those things are especially difficult to accomplish if you suffer from mental illness and/or addiction problems too.

[@abbery9202]

Decrease your spending. If you live at home you should have little bills. If it costs you less money to live you can spend less time working and more time trying things Also being anxious about this sort of thing and not positive will likely keep you in the exact same place only older as time goes on. Nobody can enjoy or even be positive when they are constantly worried that they are at a insurmountable disadvantage. Get a sales job. Do something hard. I'm 28, I'm a sales trainer at my company, I see kids all the time change their lives and their attitudes, others give themselves an excuse because their frustrated and would rather blame the world. Get away from people who think they are fucked and your generation has it bad. Confidence is contagious. Confidence will influence how courageous and how cowardly you are, all the decisions you make, the trajectory of your life.

[@ChestersonJack]

Yeah I feel that. I also don’t have a lot of interest in marrying or having kids, which removes two of the three “door closers” he spoke of.

[@crazydragy4233]

Most freedoms depend entirely on where you're born and who to, so not exactly factors you influence sadly. He does try to acknowledge he's privileged but middle class big city folk will always have a mostly inapplicable perspective to someone in a dying town from a Corn state

[@_hadoken]

I think the biggest piece of advice, especially for young men, is to stay humble. You don't know everything. It's not important to be the best at everything. You don't have to be admired by everyone. If these are the goals you set, you can only expect disappointment or catastrophe.

[@Raphe9000]

I think it's also good to not let your humility cloud your ambition, just like what he said in the video. I'm someone who often suffers from believing myself incapable or underqualified to do things almost as a way of life, and his point that most of the people who have found success in doing those things were themselves not different from any normal person skill-wise and to an extent still aren't really hit home for me. As with all things, it's a balancing act that depends on each person's unique situation both with themselves and with those around them, but I do think the idea of remaining humble in your opinion of your abilities but also recognizing that those around you are very similar to yourself can really help your understanding of your own position in the world around you.

[@ludological]

The distinction and balance between humility and ambition are definitely struggles for me! I'm glad to hear that at least some others seem to have developed a nuanced understanding/distinction there; hopefully, that means it will be easier for me to do so as I accrue general life perspective as well!

[@themapleleafforever1526]

@@Raphe9000 As someone who struggles with imposter syndrome at the workplace and in relationships, this resonates with me.

[@anyoneelsebutme5757]

@@cordfortina9073 Well even if they're confident and ambitious, they're usually not DELUSIONALLY so. Like they know their strengths and weaknesses and they'll try to improve themselves but they'd probably know that being 100% perfect and admired by everyone is impossible. After all a lot of players are happy filling their niche on the bench/for a smaller team, same way how I'm sure a lot of musicians are happy not being a superstar singer-songwriter, and instead ply their craft behind the scenes as a sessionist or working on a smaller, yet livable scale.

[@kilyos9212]

I started lifting weights in my late 30s and I am doing much better than just "maintaining". I really look better than ever. Thanks JJ, happy birthday.

[@yungdraco6075]

That’s awesome bro happy to hear it

[@nicholasmanila]

I’ve been watching your videos for awhile now and they all are very meaningful for me. I had a job as a delivery driver last year that I absolutely hated. I would daily listen to your videos for 3+ hours a day in the truck. It was overall a sad time in my life with a lot of changes and your videos helped me through the 9-5, so I thank you for that. I also find it very inspiring that you value helping younger people to the extent you do. So many KZbinrs are such bad role models, but you are definitely not one of them. A few months ago I wrote to you about a KZbin channel idea I had about Hungarian culture. You and another KZbinr took the time to respond to me, which was so nice. It just shows you aren’t just on this platform for a job, but as someone who just genuinely likes being there for others. So, thanks for being there, especially for when I was stuck in a FedEx truck 😂

[@JJMcCullough]

Wow what a lovely story. It means a lot to me to know that my stuff provided you with comfort in a difficult time. I have to ask though: which video of mine is your favorite?

[@nicholasmanila]

@@JJMcCullough I love the video on the difficulty of human names across cultures, and the idea of universal principles that go along with someone’s name especially when they are in a foreign country. I think you could make a great similar video on exonym names of countries. I also love any video where my small obscure country of Hungary is mentioned :)

[@alfieboseley9884]

as a 19yo man, this is just the perspective i’ve been needing in my life right now. i’ve been going through a hard time and having just a projection of what life can be like for the next decade or so is just what the doctor ordered. thank you so much JJ, you’re the best dawg! happy 40th!

[@JJMcCullough]

It means a lot to me that you found it useful

[@daimsaeed]

Brother your life has only just begun, remind yourself of your childhood dreams and go at it, this life is too precious to not go after your dreams and I promise you have enough time especially at your age but never too much

[@BASEDHITLORLOVER14n88]

your life is over. im 19 also

[@Sam_on_YouTube]

I turned 40 during the pandemic. Really limited the celebration options. My wife rented out a local movie theater (which, in a small town in 2020 when they were desperate for revenue, was a lot cheaper than you'd expect). We watched TENET in the theater with just the two of us.

[@ya8158]

AMC had theater rentals for around $100. But you couldn’t choose any movie, They had a few options. I don’t think they do this anymore.

[@Sam_on_YouTube]

@@ya8158 Now that's how much they make for a relatively poor showing of a movie about to leave theaters. Prices to rent out a theater are a lot higher now than they were in 2020.

[@gabor6259]

@@Sam_on_KZbin Sounds awesome!

[@SanskarWagley]

I turned 30 in May 2020, celebrated with whiskey and a steak from Outback lol

[@DanSoloha]

Did you like it? I personally loved it, but I know it definitely wasn’t for everyone

[@bagel3703]

I love JJ but I think he's a little optimistic about the financial situation of guys in their 20s.

[@simeonlewis4915]

Fr bro if I don't start saving for a house straight after college I'll be renting in my 30s lol

[@mintgreenghost]

I think anyone over 35 who grew up middle class is a little optimistic about the financial situation of younger people. Someone got snippy with me last week about Gen Z not wanting to grow up (drive, move out, etc). Not exactly our fault the economy of anywhere tied to the US has been on the fritz since we've been able to form sentences.

[@Var_]

Blaming the economy and the sentiment that older people had it better is a tradition old as time. I can't imagine the quality of life as a random young person today is worse than a random young person in the 80s. People like to cherry pick concepts like home ownership rates, but totally ignore others like technology, ability to travel, access to information and social mobility, etc. We heard the same for Millennials which are also doing ~fine now. Obviously this is a gross generalization, but so is the claim that life is worse now.

[@soupycask]

You just got to be financially responsible and frugal in your spending to the best of your ability.

[@ashkitt7719]

@@mintgreenghost Don't grow up, it's a trap.

[@tuckersmoak6632]

im the maintenance manager of a large factory in my mid 30s. I've happily convinced quite a large handful of young men in their early 20s to not stick around the factory like that parents most likely did to go out and do more with their lives. They are capable of so much more than being one of the production employees that never get promoted. I told them to put me as a reference and I'll say whatever they want to help them get a job they truly want. I've helped more than ten bright young men to go do something more with their lives. Its honestly one of the best parts of my job.

[@KhmerH20]

thank you for helping those young men. sounds like you found your true calling.

[@Svabby]

you are a hero

[@paulhamrick3943]

One thing that should be noted is that JJ is a winner, he’s written (or writes?) for The Washington Post, as he mentioned he’s appeared on television multiple times to offer political/cultural/current events analysis, he has a massively successful KZbin channel, these are great accomplishments. So he feels good about his failures because in the end it has worked out. It should also be mentioned that he’s a gay man and I have lots of gay male friends and they are in a different “schedule” than straight people.

[@mcmann7149]

When you commented about being modest in your claims about the future, I remembered a saying that my tennis coach told me once, "Keep your words short and sweet, because you never know when you have to eat them".

[@honkytonkinson9787]

That’s a true and memorable phrase!

[@frankthetank2550]

This partners VERY nicely with Jreg's video about mentors being the most underrated relationship a young man can have

[@40nights40daystv]

I never really had one through my 20s. I’m only 26 now, but most adults I’ve come to know are actually the worst. I think a lot of baby boomers and gen-xers don’t have it in them to care about the younger generations. Look what they’ve done to the economy and family structures of western society.

[@kingmaxthe_first3389]

Bro looks younger than 40

[@evandaignault]

Agreed, he looks 39

[@RandomAussieGuy87]

Without the moustache he'd look like he's in his 20's

[@bigsmek]

Fr bros stunning

[@ortherner]

looks 30

[@12_terabyte57]

I’d put him at 34-36 if I was guessing, so yeah I guess so

[@bozodubbedover]

As a mid-20s woman a lot of this advice echoed with me still and you’ve definitely been an inspiration to keep trying and failing. I appreciate your insights J.J! happy 40th!

[@FrankJames]

Great video, J.J. Your final point about advice is true. Many 20-something guys will hear your advice, intellectually comprehend it, perhaps remember most of it and know it is "good advice." But it is not until their lived experience lines up with it that they will truly understand its value. Throughout my 20s I heard the advice "this is the time to travel and see the world." I wanted very much to travel. I even got my passport when I was 26. But I never used it. I guess I thought it was a waste of time and money, as you mention. Finally when I was 34 I went to Italy on my honeymoon. It was special to have that first international travel experience with my wife. But it was not until then that I realized how good the advice to travel in my 20s truly was, and I am kicking myself for putting it off for so long.

[@atomicgandhi8718]

Counterpoint, unless you are middle class or higher, spending large quantities of money and time travelling may ensure you are partner-less and penniless at 30. with your youth spent. The vast majority of the population is not middle class. Its almost abuse for him to give advice like this to poor people.

[@Draconic_Aura]

@@atomicgandhi8718 all advice relating to "freedom" and "doing things so you don't regret them later" assume that you are at least middle class to start, as those are only really middle class and above worries. If you have money, travel. If you don't have money or have something more important to spend the money on, don't travel.

[@pointblank5126]

"Dont be so quick to skip over yourself for consideration" line hit me pretty hard... Im 25 and professionally I've struggled alot with feeling expendable in my current job but not really feeling like I'd be "worth" promoting or being hired by somewhere I may be happier. It's been really hard to make new friends in the new city I'm living in because I feel I'm so exhausted in the moments I have time to be social that I'd rather be alone. Idk, I "want" all these things and then second guess myself by wondering whether I'm just looking for a greener pasture where there isn't one. So much uncertainty around what's worth spending my time on and even deciding what I "want". Really appreciated this video!

[@ZorgoXorgon]

I heavily relate, fellow viewer. My own 29 yr. journey through self-doubt has been rough. I hate to say it, but I still don't know what I "want" in life and constantly feel like I don't know what I'm doing. But, I do have a firmer grasp on who I "am." The self-declaration thing he talks about is real. Make the change you want to see. Make it a part of your identity. If you do that, it will work. All in all, it seems that very few if any of us truly know what we're doing. We all fake it until we make it. Some are better at playing the part or lying to themselves.

[@AlexWalkerSmith]

I think advice from someone slightly older than yourself is most helpful. I'm 35, and have been watching your channel for a few years now, and I think the fact that you're "just ahead of me" in age makes your guidance very applicable to where I am in life.

[@cadetlimbo]

the most shocking thing i learnt from this is how you're 40.. honestly stunned

[@briancomforti3890]

No man has ever been more 40 than this man

[@ThatLad685]

Not that I should be chiming in (I’m only 25) but something that I recently discovered which has been life changing is the importance of reading. I used to take reading completely for-granted as a teenager, thinking of it more as a chore I had to do for school than anything else. I used to think “if I need to learn something I’ll just google it or watch a KZbin video about it”. but once i actually tried it out, I realized that all the knowledge these guys on KZbin were teaching me, were actually already in print and in much more depth than I could ever get from a KZbin video.

[@alejandroma7593]

What books do you recommend?

[@ThatLad685]

@@alejandroma7593 I’m really into history and politics, so a few I really enjoyed was 1984 by George Orwell, The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich by William Shrier, and the Second World Wars by Victor Davis Hanson. Another I’ll add that I thought was interesting was The Art of the Deal by Donald Trump. It’s super fascinating to see how he thought back in 1987 and how he utilizes certain things today. For example there’s a whole part in the book where he talks about using the media to make himself and his brand stay popular and relevant. He even outright says that bad press is still good press since they’re giving you free publicity, which has certainly been the case for him these last 8 years. Even if you’re not a big Trump fan it’s worth a read in my opinion.

[@englishtachanka1567]

As someone who is now 23 and has been watching you since his mid teenage years, it's hard to overstate how valuable you have been in helping to form my life and opinions. I started watching you in college (I'm english so age 16-18) until now and in that time I've gone from failing my A-levels to now working finishing up my first year on my History PhD. While it feels weird to credit you with all this, your approach to life and learning was, and continues to be, extremely influential. So yeah, thanks JJ and thanks for even more unsolicited life advice 😂

[@Marylandbrony]

As a 26 year old. One of the things I've changed my opinion on is, at least in the last 10 years of fact, how little is it worth trying to persuade people in general. Most people either already have a set of beliefs they already have or simply lack interest in them. Especially when you get older. I think being a teenager in high school or even middle school might be the best time to teach politics and "the issues" of the day. If not even younger. Of course I might be the exception since I've had interest in politics since I was a child.

[@JJMcCullough]

I think most people have a personality disposition that inclines them to one sort of belief system over another, whether that’s disgust, envy, paranoia, greed, etc.

[@larrydugan1441]

I am old. Much of what you are taught in school is simply not true. My recommendation is to read, particularly information that you don't agree with. Challenge your beliefs.

[@Bubblebiskit2200]

As a teenage girl I find your advice very applicable

[@Name-iq8te]

sameee

[@Pyrrha1814]

right? I think its fairly universal across both genders (and everything in between!!!)

[@BASEDHITLORLOVER14n88]

as a teenage guy, sex sex sex sex NOW

[@Hangrypotat]

Same just turned 16

[@jaguarmemez]

@@BASEDHITLORLOVER14n88We are not animals, if you want to act like one go be with them then.

[@iceteaisjuice683]

As someone in my early 20s, i really resonated with your point about people in power being pretty average. You really can end up in a rather impressive position in life if you orient yourself in that direction and choose to pursue your interests so you don't regret anything later on.

[@leometz7287]

Yes. I'm 25 and now work for the Minister of Transportation of Germany. It's really not that hard if you want to go into a certain direction

[@luka1932]

@@leometz7287need network with people like you

[@Draconic_Aura]

eh, i'd prefer not to be in power. I am ok with a government job, but I don't need that much spotlight on me

[@Steadyaim101]

As someone now leaving my 20s behind, the advice on habit sticks with me. Usually this kind of advice videos enrage me. "Put money in your TFSAs! Invest!" - I work 40+ hours a week and am in my PhD full time but still can't afford rent. what money should I use? "Travel! Have hobbies! See the world!" Again with what money? I'm just barely above water here and my debt is growing. But healthy habits you can do. Take 20 minutes for some exercise. Commit to 3L water everyday. Be mindful of what and why you are eating. It doesn't cost money, and usually doesn't take much time. The deciding factor is your discipline, and trust me, the life demands don't get less so building those habits early will save you a tonne of heart-ache trying to build them later when it truly matters for your health.

[@viennajordan9279]

I am 23 and I wish I could go back and tell my teenage self that everything's gonna be okay and to stop being terrified. Now that I'm in my 20s, I wish my older self could come and tell me the same thing now. I am terrified of life; of running out of money, of not achieving my dreams, of not doing *enough*. I wish there was some way to just know that it's all gonna work out.

[@JJMcCullough]

It might not work out, but it's only your 20s.

[@Willyamsii]

Been watching you since I just just doing retail and now I’m a baby paramedic. You have been a staple for years through it all, thanks JJ

[@ghidotheone]

As a 24 year old gay man who has been dealing with extreme self-doubt issues for years, I find myself always flocking to videos like this only to constantly be hung up on that last point. I want the advice, clearly. I know what needs to change. The question is, how do I break that barrier between knowing what needs to be done about my life and practical implementation of it? I'm starting to think that believing there's a barrier at all might be what's holding me back.

[@VanyaBoston]

Change your environment. Like moving to a new flat. You just need to break your habits.

[@VanyaBoston]

@xyxx566 You can rent a room on the other side of town. You don't need to move to another country. It's about changing the environment to help break your habits. It's been heavily researched that changing your environment is the most effective way to change habits. Example: Heroin addicted American soldiers coming back from Nam. At the end of the day, everyone is in charge of their own happiness. Do what you want, either make excuses on why you can't make something happen or find solutions to make it happen.

[@WiseSnake]

Mate, I'm just now opening doors in my early 30s. I had no goals or direction during my 20s, but I was really curious and liked to travel around a lot. Really focused hard on plants and insects and developed a passion for ecology. I decided to finally go to college and my life experience has been going up rapidly ever since. Lots of connections, lots of experiences, some of which I already developed during my 20s. I'm not sure where I'm going to end up mentally when the 40s come around. 😅

[@jstnshea]

It’s very fascinating for me (at 23) to constantly be in this state of shifting my perspective on the world while things are actively happening around me, but always trying my best to remain true to my inner sense of self.

[@fossilfern]

I’m nearly 34 so not too far off from you! And my main advice for people would be “just go for it”. I’ve many regrets about not taking chances because I was afraid of failing or embarrassing myself. Since 28 or so i just “go for it”. Also keep fit which is something I’ve always done is keep fit but there was 2 years were my fitness was just shit and I’ll never do that again.

[@gmg9010]

As a 23 year old I’m here for it.

[@southcoastinventors6583]

Only relevant advice is try to own any kind of small property or livable vehicle located near decent jobs because true freedom is not spending 30-40% of your income on rent. Also don't be afraid to move. Good luck to you on your future endeavors

[@ann2574]

I honestly clicked on this video because I'm 23 and i feel very lost in life rn lol

[@gmg9010]

@@ann2574 don’t we all

[@evandunbar5605]

same.

[@stijnvisser7306]

Same man, 23 too. Have so many ideas but find it hard to do for no reason or without community. And the communities of people who do the things I want to do are not big. Novel lusical instrument (piano-like instruments) building, car manufacturing, spaceflight, improving education.

[@gerarddip]

As a 19 year old guy, I appreciate this very much.

[@rebokfleetfoot]

i wish somebody had told me when i was 19 :)

[@nkanyezitshabalala5256]

Same.

[@HELIOSXXI]

Just Turned 21

[@abdulwasey3506]

Hey same, but turned 21 in April​@@HELIOSXXI

[@creepyjesus1471]

I really like the point about making habits part of your identity to get them to stick! thanks JJ!

[@assassinblackop]

The showing up part is right on. I looked at my hospital's c suite and realized most of my bosses have no more formal education than me, they just steadily grew at different positions and kept changing jobs every 5 or so years.

[@acommonloser]

Man I'm 27 and an absolutly pure fuckup, I know it's my fault too like no doubt at all - but you know, I'm not sad or unhappy about it, it's more a statement of fact. I'm not at all defeated but I know now that I'm not going to have the kind of life I wanted when I finished high school. The thing is, I'm not even sure if I would have liked what I wanted. The only real rough part is feeling left behind by friends, still at the starting line kind of thing. I simply have no idea anymore what I'm doing, but its not a bad life at all, I'm happy to be here ! ! ! !

[@alexbarfield9153]

First off, I'm glad that you're happy to be alive, that can be a pretty challenging step! But at the same time, It's okay to feel like you've fucked up and have had endless failures and mistakes in your 20's and feel like you don't know what you're doing anymore. It is incredibly common! But, what matters is what you do with those feelings. Being "an absolutely pure fuckup" is not a permanent state of being, it's just a response to events and moments that is enhanced by self deprecating feelings, many of which are twisted versions of the truth. I have felt the same way many times in my life. For a good 5 years of my life I thought I was an extreme fuckup, irredeemable, a failure. But I realized that life isn't static, it's always changing and evolving, and a lot less linear than we often think. Now, I am chasing my dreams after years of seeking to live a life I thought would satisfy and please those around me (which took a long time to find, it's okay to not have any big dreams or ambitions rn, just keep looking and experiencing) and now I am as content with my failures as I am with my successes. Don't be afraid to make changes or take big risks, you have so much you can possibly do and see, even within the confines of wherever your life has been so far. It doesn't matter anymore if you are going to have the life you thought you might have had as a teenager, because that life would've never happened the way you were thinking it would anyways. Just go out and LIVE, and experience things wherever you are and wherever you can go. There may not be a light at the end of the tunnel, but if that's the case then there probably isn't an eternal hellfire burning behind you either. It can be hard to launch yourself without anyone supporting you or affirming your dreams, but it is possible. If a guy whose been in the mental hospital, who grew up with an alcoholic father, who has experienced years of therapy and treatment, who knows addiction, and who experienced the unimaginable pain that is hurting others and not being able to rectify your wrongs, like myself, then I'm sure you could do it to! Fucking up, happiness, bitterness, sadness, they all come in waves and blips. Don't forget to feel! You're 27 years old, you have so you can experience and do, if you just go and do it. Don't be afraid!

[@rainmanjr2007]

One loses common interests with friends and sometimes discover they didn't really know you well. Your best relationship will always be with yourself but folks need time to discover that. In teens we feel awkward so it becomes a surprise to become easy.

[@skrk6]

I was a fuck up at 27. I caught up to everyone I considered friends in my 20s financially real quick, but I traded the last few years of my 20's and early 30s to do it. Most of my friends from my early 20s are out of my life for different reasons except for two. My only major regrets were being hung up on the past for so long and letting anxiety/depression hold me back.

[@samb4067]

I’m turning 20 one week from today, so the timing couldn’t be better. Taking notes!

[@shevi2000]

You got this 💪

[@wizboi2480]

Dont watch porn

[@theechorenegade6039]

I like when JJ just sits down and talks about what is on his mind, for someone who is usually very put together and coordinated it’s nice to see him just talk about his personal perspective. As some one who’s 21 this was fun to listen to and made me think more about commitment and ambition. Appreciate it JJ

[@minaDesuDesu]

As a 27 year old going through "quatre life crisis" this really helps. Thank you J.J.!

[@MixedBerryTea]

Your last point about the relativity of advice is really salient. I spent so much of my late 20s comparing myself to other people and their accomplishments in the guise of trying to find advice that I lost myself and a lot of those years to self-doubt/sabotage. Said another way, it's useful to hear or even read about the lives of others, but it can never be a roadmap for your own. Really great video, best recommended I've gotten in awhile.

[@adotleee]

"failure is a proxy for trying" thank you for this video JJ!

[@dr00skee47]

Your advice about advice is so true. People just need to make their own mistakes

[@martinmaynard141]

I used to work with a guy in his late 20's who was aiming to be middle-aged before his time. He kept trying to give me advice which was rather irritating since I was a good 20 years older than him and have a wealth of experience which he (obviously) never had!

[@elihyland4781]

i turned 40 yesterday. JJ is right about basically everything and gets handsomer with time❤

[@supersejkaj3093]

Happy birthday to the number 1 Cansplainer 🎉🇨🇦

[@wii1199]

I just want to say that I recommend you to my male students constantly. I use your Fauxmerican video for a lesson on how different cultures see the USA in my ELA class. This is often the first time my students have heard of you and a few boys have asked for your channel name. So thank you for being a good male role model!

[@JJMcCullough]

Thanks much! I will do my best to live up to the reputation

[@zehprofessor8559]

This video was like a blessing to me, it’s been a rather confusing time in my life as a 20-something. Obviously I’m still too young & stubborn to listen to all of your advice to heart, but you gave me a deep breath of stress-free air, and I appreciate it.

[@federicoguerrera5535]

Happy Birthday! Hope you’ll have a blessed day I’m a lonely 25yo Maths PhD student in Germany; despite my commitment to many of your life advice (specifically, being surrounded by a selected group of close friends and finding a mentor), I have largely failed to achieving them, thus I have been focusing my entire existence on my studies, while also indulging in political affairs (which are increasingly demoralising as of late). Having said that, I have been a subscriber since very early on and I always enjoy your wisdom and character. Merci!

[@jclover3344]

I feel for you but you have to keep trying. Relationships with people is not something you achieve and put on a shelf. Even as a fifty something person, I keep trying to figure out how to make friends because they come and go. I join clubs and organizations that I have an interest in and stick with it for a while. Friendship is a long term investment, like education so it's ok if it takes time. So pick up a hobby or a sport, join book clubs or take cooking or dance classes, lately I've looked into bumble for friends.... it's not easy but I keep trying

[@GeopoliticsNow87]

Really need it Going through things right now So thanks

[@undeadmuffin]

My 20's were filled with dealing with my own overlooked health issues from my teen years. I didn't get to do anything on account of being in and out of the hospital. Now I'm just 3 years out from turning 40 (something I didn't even expect to be able to say). I didn't get to do anything really in my 20's and most of my 30's has been eaten away at by the pandemic. It feels hopeless at times as I can't work and my wife recently got laid off and can't find a job. However, I'm trying to push through. I'm taking better care of myself. Lost 80 pounds in the last 7 months because I've cut back on what I was eating and have started walking every single day. I'm no longer taking medications that I have been on since I was a teenager because of this. When the crushing weight of time isn't pressing down on my mind, I feel like I'm 17 years old again. It's hard not to stare at the clock and lament the limited amount of time I have left. My dad did die at 42 from a freak infection, so my brain tells me constantly that is the limit for myself. I myself was given only 2 years when I was in my early 20s and due to life I didn't have the means to see the world or do anything of real note outside of taking a trip to D.C. in 2012. Yet here I am. I wish someone would have told me to focus on living rather than focus on dying. I have no saved money as when I got anything I spent it almost right away. Why hold onto it when I am living on borrowed time. I ate what I wanted to eat because "in the end it didn't matter, I'll be dead in a month or two any ways". I burdened my wife with debt for expensive surgeries, trips that were done only for medical reasons (some of which turns out were caused by medications I'm thankfully no longer taking). I guess what I'm just trying to toss out there, despite this sounding like I'm looking for pity: Even if you are being told you don't have long, you have no idea how much time you truly have left. Don't spend your youth in fear of the end, because it might not come as fast as the "professionals" are telling you. You don't want to be getting to the point that you life is turning around and one hick-up such as a loss of a job can send you right back to the depts that you took so long to get out of. See the world when given the opportunity (I had several and didn't do them). Take care of your body even if you have to do so in a very limited way. Also be very, very mindful that medications work differently for everyone and if you have a health issue that no one can seem to find the cause for it might just be the meds. I don't know if anyone who will need this little bit of advice will see it, but I hope it finds it's way to at least one person who does. Also it's apparently normal for people to start going a little gray in their mid to late 20's, it doesn't mean you'll have a full head of gray hair in your 30's. I swear these pesky gray hairs had me thinking my body was braking down faster than normal because of my heart issues. Blah, what as waste of time fearing something that just wasn't true.

[@Edward_USMC13]

Full disclosure, I just couldn't slog through your multiple paragraphs, but I did want to ask what you meant when you said you lost most of your 30s with the pandemic? LOL did the approximate 6 to 12 months of overreaction and lockdowns the rest of us experience somehow translate into multiple years for you😂

[@johnbrown4682]

Very well written. Thank you

[@johnbrown4682]

​@@Edward_USMC13 selective listening

[@valdezjones]

JJ, you feel like the older cousin I always wanted. What I mean by that is this: I grew up with cousins who were all either ten years older or ten years younger than me. I always wanted to be around my older cousins because I thought they were cool-but at the age this mattered the most to me, my communication skills were all either egocentric or pandering. Not to mention that they all have more reserved dispositions than I do. When I would try to talk to them, it felt like it landed on deaf ears and I blamed myself for it usually. So I had to default to the younger kids who would give me some attention-even if it wasn’t the attention I wanted. I feel like this is the response, in a way, that I was always looking for from those older cousins. I was 22 when I got married, and I don’t regret it, though realistically there were a lot of things I could have otherwise experienced as a bachelor in my 20s. I was probably 24 when my wife and I were taking our newborn baby on a walk and I saw some teenagers skateboarding. I said to my wife “Skateboarding is something I always wanted to do, but I don’t feel like I can.” She asked me “Why not?” And I didn’t have an answer to that besides having convinced myself I just can’t. She then encouraged me to take up the hobby if I wanted to. 5 years later and I love it. I’m not great, but it makes me happy. I think that I was conditioned throughout my life to think that some hobbies/identities were just “not really my thing” (a quote I remember hearing from my well-meaning if not at times limiting parents). It was liberating to yoke myself to a person who believed that I could do whatever I wanted. Ironically, I think I’ve experienced a lot more having gotten married than if I didn’t because I always limited myself until I learned from her more clearly of my potential. This leads to your point about advice. Advice is generally given from a place of experience, yet my experience is unique to me. I tend to think that when any given person receives advice, they will cut and paste the parts they want and leave the rest. For instance, many would suggest marrying and especially having kids older than I did, but it’s turned out to be the most self-actualizing experience in my life. Sure, I have had to concede in certain aspects of my life, but it has been a trade-off worth making for me. The paths that any individual life can take is wildly endless, and something is so fascinating and inspiring about that. We have the freedom to choose what we do with our lives despite spaghetting older 🍝

[@EpicMiniMeatwad]

So, have amazing friends? Ancient Greece had some interesting propositions on what constitutes intimacy.

[@Nazrininator]

28yo here. I've been rewatching videos in my Life Advice playlist over the past 4 months, and this is a worthy addition to that playlist. Most of those videos were made around 2018-2020. I get what you're trying to say by saying that Advice is Overrated. Some of the life advice videos I watched back then had advice that wasn't syncretic to me, and some are even slightly outdated when I rewatched them. But, most of them still have useful life advice that I can apply to my life now that I'm as free as I can be. I'll try to fit in walking into my daily routine.

[@NearlyPerfectGames]

As a 23-year-old, I absolutely love this video JJ. Please make more like this. Can you make a video about dating?

[@ashkitt7719]

Honestly, I'm curious as well because as a furry I'm used to a completely different dynamic when it comes to romance, secks, etc. Even when compared to non-furry LGBTQ folks, it's wildly different.

[@moddalgaming3619]

​@@ashkitt7719pls get help, that's definetly ill and not normal.

[@RedDogRichard2112]

@@ashkitt7719 Agreed! Im both yet I have no clue how to interact with or date either.

[@ashkitt7719]

@@RedDogRichard2112 I just know that the kind of flirting that's done with furries will not work with non-furries.

[@RedDogRichard2112]

@@ashkitt7719 Interesting, I should really learn what furry flirting looks like so I can tell when its happening to me. Granted Im not sure what regular filtering looks like haha. This is obviously a me problem, since I'm pretty asexual and dumb to Social cues.

[@ForkyMeetsPorky]

As a newly 26 year old, I came to a lot of these same points myself pretty recently. I realize now how much self doubt was the source of my dissatisfaction with life, because I never had enough confidence in myself that I could do the cool but risky things I dreamed about doing. The biggest change feels like instead of being scared to try new things or risk failing, I WANT to try my hand at new things and risk pursuing things, regardless if they work out or not. Too many days spent telling myself I’ll reset and get a routine next Monday, it’s gotta be today!

[@liborkundrat185]

I'm 25 and I'm stuck struggling with the same things you claim to have struggled with. Any advice regarding what might've been the impulse for the mindset to switch?

[@ForkyMeetsPorky]

@@liborkundrat185 it was a culmination of things. I’ve struggled with self loathing most of my life, and I was a former gifted kid that put too much stock into being Smart and good at tests. I could get through school with enough minimum effort to get good grades but not actually build a work ethic. I eventually hit a road block in my grad studies where I could no longer coast off talent and rote memorization, I actually had to schedule and organize and put effort into trying and failing and improving. At the same time, I have been lucky to have enough friends and acquaintances (very few were close) around me to validate that I am likeable and talented and capable of impressive things, I just only need to apply myself and stick it through. TLDR; I stopped letting my fear of failure stop my from starting, and I started believing in myself and my potential enough to stick with things if I don’t quite succeed at first. Perseverance essentially, and the realization that no one is going to save you, so you might as well save yourself while your family and friends are still around.

[@ForkyMeetsPorky]

Oh also, I have ADHD, and had been on Concerta for almost 20 years. My depression and anxiety (and chronic vaping/procrastinating behaviours) got so bad that I switched to Vyvanse about a month ago. It has an active anti anxiety property to it, and that could also explain my increase in motivation and optimism.

[@trevinotano]

Happy birthday JJ-you’ve given me amazing advice in these videos over the years and can honestly say it corrected the course I was on then and lead to the success I have now. I turn 30 next week. Cheers!

[@JJMcCullough]

Aw thanks so much

[@evanprice5470]

Hey JJ, it was cool seeing you working at the cafe last night! I would've wished you a happy birthday had I known. Thanks for the advice. I'll let you know how useful it is when I turn 40

[@SaltwaterCowboy709]

Happy Birthday J.J. 🎂 I'm 29 and just purchased my first home this week and have been subscribed to your videos for years. This could not come at a better time. Thank you

[@spadinnerxylaphone2622]

I turn 30 in a few months and pretty much did the exact opposite of your advice in my 20s. I'll say firsthand to anybody in their 20s reading this; please LISTEN TO JJ. He's right! 😂

[@johnnytechman1224]

I'm a Gen Xer in my 50s, and I like to hear other people's opinions, experiences, and stories. I feel that there are more than one perspective to anything in life. I thank you very much for your videos, they do broaden my horizons about most things in life. Happy Birthday, and keep on truckin' and chooglin' on. 😎👍

[@bhowlerr]

I’ve come back and watched this 4 times now. Very considerate video.

[@johnathankain8033]

I continue to resent what I feel as having had the last few years of my 20s stolen from me by The Pandemic. By the time you're 27 or so you become quite aware that life isn't going to last forever. I really didn't enjoy not being allowed to travel, party, etc as I'd wanted to during this time.

[@TXMEDRGR]

I feel the same in my sixties. The pandemic hit the year I retired and ruined my plans for travel and other activities. I lost the first few years of my retirement.

[@theprodigalson4003]

It’s ok bro. We all missed out. Your not alone in that, and that brings community

[@dingus6317]

It took my junior and senior years of high school to

[@RedDogRichard2112]

Awesome to hear! I wish its was earlier though, I'm going to be 33 this year. I totally agree with the advice to never drink, smoke, or do drugs! Also limit sun exposure (depends on where you live) (hair and skincare are super important too learn them at young age it helps a lot! But don't obsess about it or go crazy buying 50 different things!). Being fit can only increase your attractiveness honestly! Its kind of sad that some people have to justify that. I really wish I was and would be more out going but thats super hard to change at least for me.

[@angeeast4209]

Happy Birthday, handsome! You are right on the money with this one. I am 44. I think my 30s were the most fun. I did not have to be overly responsible, but I was just responsible enough to start being more comfortable in life and with myself.

[@Zyo117]

"your 20s are the period where you'll have the most time to recover from mistakes" Most people spend that paying off student loans and juggling food and rent these days.

[@theprodigalson4003]

Bro acts like apartment and job hopping is an attainable thing to do. You miss a fortnightly payment then what, live in a tent where you get fined for that too? This guy looks young, because he’s lived through nothing. And feels he’s qualified to give advice when he’s never exhausted his health for anything because he hasn’t had to

[@zack_whom]

@@theprodigalson4003yep. The “freedoms” he’s talking about are not universal whatsoever. Dude said “travel the world, move cities, go get a second degree” like most 20s year olds just have disposable income like that now. Cost of living is so shit now and it affords me no flexibility. Not trying to claim victim hood, but it’s crushing to ambition when things just seem more and more out of reach

[@TheOneMagpie]

Paused the video as soon as I learned it's yet another "your 20s are for experiencing the world!" joke and went right to reading the comments instead. He's right that your 20s are for freedom, just in far more ways than 'to experience'. To a lot of people, your entire 20s can be dedicated to finally being separated from and dealing with an entire childhood ravaged by abuse or trauma, like the freedom of living elsewhere, or to be independent, or dependent on someone who's loving and understanding. This perception of your 20s is also so skewed against women, who are usually told their 'time is running out!!' if they're not two kids deep by the time they're 28, then having these same women punished and ostracized for trying to experience those same freedoms he's talking about.

[@charlesthompson6068]

57 year old Queb here. Happy birthday JJ....keep it coming!

[@64imma]

Happy birthday, JJ! Next year will mark my 30th birthday, so I am having a lot of reflection that I am undertaking. One thing that I really took away from your video is the idea of self-doubt and how hindering it can be. In my early 20s, I had a lot of big ambitions for where my life would be, but I didn't follow through with any of it because of self-doubt. I wish someone would've taught me about self-love and self-confidence when I was younger. I've bounced between multiple career paths in my 20s. I was in college for all of my early 20s. First, I earned a bachelor's degree in psychology. My initial goal was to either be a psychologist or a mental health counselor. For some reason, I got it in my head that I actually wanted to be a school counselor. When I started graduate school, my concentration was actually in school counseling. I ended up dropping out of my graduate program because I failed one of my classes. In this class, I was tasked with going to an elementary school and providing counseling services to children. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing through any of it, and it ended up being a huge waste of time for myself and the school. I severely damaged my academic perception as a result. I did, however, go back to a bachelors in Spanish for 2.5 years. I had the goal of becoming a Spanish translator or medical interpreter, but never felt that my Spanish was good enough even after 10 years of studying the language. I did try to go back to graduate school again for Spanish linguistics, but there was an issue with my application, and I was denied. I then tried pursuing a management career with the retail company I was working at, but I hated the job, and my self-esteem dropped so much, that I was becoming suicidal. I then got a job with Coca Cola as a merchandiser, with ambitions of rising up with the company. I also hated this job because I had absolutely no social life due to all the hours I was expected to work. More importantly I found that I wasn't as proud of the products as I once thought I was, so I chose to leave the job. I am currently working for a casino as a slot technician, with dreams and ambitions to work for a company that makes the machines. I also am learning game development on the side, currently as a hobby, but hopefully it will translate into a more fulfilling career. I am starting to have my reservations about my job with the casino after working there for almost a year, but I am honestly so exhausted with the whole "switching jobs every couple of years" that I really don't want to go just yet. More importantly, I am constantly angry with myself for not having had the confidence or motivation to pursue higher paying careers when I had the opportunity. The number 1 thought I have going into my 30s soon is I really wish I could reverse time and redo my entire 20s with the knowledge and wisdom I currently have. I wish I would have spent more time developing stronger social connections, because now I am at a point in my life where I am very isolated and alone. The thing about making friends is it gets easier to attract new friends the more friends and connections you do have. It is incredibly hard to start from scratch, but once there's some momentum going, it's really about making a conscious effort to maintain the friendships you do have.

[@Fishermhm]

Married and with a mortgage at 21. Still in hometown. Did I kinda just jump past that freedom phase? I'm happy where I'm at, and love my wife and house. Obviously, I'm naive, but I do not regret the decisions I've made so far.

[@Colyde25]

I mean you got a house and wife. Unless you got a baby on the way that’s definitely freedom my guy. Also by saying that I don’t mean kids are traps it’s just once you have kids you have a whole lot less of free time lol.

[@dabomb199715]

You have more freedom than the vast majority of people your age. If she’s truly the one and you believe in personal accountability, you are ahead of the curve.

[@Fishermhm]

@@dabomb199715 Thanks I appreciate the response.

[@1337griffin]

turning 18 next month. feeling a lot of anxiety (and excitement) set it about the fact that i’m about to start my 20’s pretty soon. hopefully i make the best of it. happy birthday jj 🎉

[@zoanth4]

I turn 40 in october. Advice for those in their mid to late 20s. Stop drinking permanently. There is no benefit post age 25 to continue drinking. Even if you aren't an alcoholoc, it still robs you of so much in your life. If anyone is curious how to or why? Just ask

[@leometz7287]

But drinking is fun

[@sdrawkcabUK]

Do you mean drinking to excess, or drinking per se? Many people as they get older learn to appreciate things like wine, craft ales etc and drink in moderation mainly for taste and to accompany socialising, rather than to get wasted as quickly as possible as you do in your 20s. It’s a nice addition to one’s life imho.

[@Bejeodiehrubridjehfoekdjriwknr]

Stop drinking permanently? Or Stop drinking, permanently.

[@nicktankard1244]

"There is no benefit post age 25" what was the benefit of drinking before 25. I'm 37 and I finally stopped drinking this year but for health reasons. My body just can't handle it anymore. But I miss it a lot. The social aspect and it's just fun. My life is worse without alcohol but my health is better so I guess it's fine

[@zoanth4]

@sdrawkcabUK I was the same way, I love dark lagers and ales. It started small and innocently. Then before I knew it I could drink 8 bottles of 10% beer. It hurt my ability to parent and be productive around the house due to the hangovevers. Haven't drank in 11 weeks, and it's the most productive I've been since I was in my 20s. Lost weight, look better. No more hangovers. And plenty more energy for the kids

[@michaelkobylko2969]

JJ is only I think five months older than me but the difference in our appearances and demeanor is chalk and cheese. I started losing my hair around age 14, my skin is dry and sometimes red, I've been mildly overweight most of my adult life. While some of this is genetic, the big difference between us is our attitude to life. As a child and young man, I had appalling self-esteem and no real self- belief. This has manifested itself as a chronic anxiety disorder that I believe, as well as affecting my quality of life, is also imprinted on my physical appearance. I ate as a response to feelings and told myself I didn't care about my belly or even my health more generally. Now 39, I've made progress but there's only so much I can do. My hair isn't coming back. My skin refuses to improve. I've learned to manage my anxiety and negative thoughts but they never go away. JJ says that by the time you reach 40 you'll likely have a wife and own property. No chance, in my case. I'm hopeless at appealing to the opposite sex (going bald makes it really difficult) and I don't earn enough to buy a house. I know I'm reasonably intelligent and I have always done well at work, but mentally, I've always feared the extra responsibility and stress that comes with jobs with higher pay. You have to work for the rewards but I am convinced it would put me in an early grave. These of course are the stories I tell about myself. I'm not the type of guy who goes to the gym. I'm not the type of guy who works hard, impresses women and earns a good wage. In reality, if you tell yourself these things, they become true. When I was in my late teens and early 20s, I had no clue of my own identity. I knew who I wasn't - I wasn't the vain type who worked on their appearance (that's my framing, not the reality). But I had no idea who I was. I knew guys who got into the gym but in my head, that's because they were the type of guys who did that. I wasn't. And let me tell you, if you're 15/16/17/18 or slightly older and you happen to be reading this and it sounds familiar, challenge these thoughts. Because your physical and mental wellbeing are so important. You pay a price down the line if you neglect them. I also have always seen myself as someone that women just couldn't be interested in. And of course, if you tell yourself that, it becomes true. I definitely recommend eating a healthy diet, avoiding alcohol and other harmful substances, drinking water and exercising as much as possible.

[@ratliff6472]

It's my birthday as I'm watching this and it was actually really helpful

[@martinmaynard141]

Happy birthday. I am now in my 60's (not sure how that happened) and while I drink and I smoke I have made swimming a part of my personality which I think has contributed to the fact that people are always shocked when I tell them how old I am. Also diet is important. While not a vegetarian I do eat a mainly plant based diet, drink lots of water and I like my sleep. I worked out in my 20's that staying in shape was an onging process and there were guys I saw at the gym who had left it too late.

[@SidHearth49]

Happy birthday. Live long and prosper!

[@samsherrard7390]

The line about advice being an explanation rather than a prescription was so articulate. Excellent!!!

[@wesleyecay8101]

Incredible wisdom, vulnerability, and strength.

[@EireHammer]

Loving the Rick Rude look you've cultivated JJ!!! Very 80's vibes!!

[@joshkorte9020]

For me and many guys in our 20's it sucks. So if this is the best it gets my generation is screwed. Everyone I know doesn't want kids, nor will ever be able to afford them. We're fully going to lose an entire generation or two because of boomer greed.

[@W333L]

Everyone not in their 20s in the comments is like “so true!”. All of us in our 20s are just staring in disbelief that nobody seems to have watched the news in the last 5 years

[@myself2noone]

In a way, that's wrong. If you track neuroticism over a lifetime, your 20s are when you're the most neurotic. It starts going down at around your 30s and basically flatlines after 50. This is where the sentiment of "youth is wasted on the young" comes from. Things look better in hindsight partly because you're not as neurotic.

[@arnoldszwarzenegger6832]

i will literally never afford a house lol either im going to finish university and get a good job, then its either renting something (lets be honest, im never gonna save money for my own apartment if im gonna rent) or living with my parents until idk my mid 30s and saving money, both options suck, where the hell is that 20s "freedom"? Older people or people born into upper middle class will never understand this, they take most things for granted. Hard work matters less than right time and place.

[@lajya01]

The Gen X outlook was pretty gloomy in the 90s coming late in the party after the boomers took all the jobs. They were called the "lost" generation. They're probably the wealthiest bunch right now. It's too early to call Gen Z and young millennials, generation screwed.

[@CharlesNauck]

@@arnoldszwarzenegger6832 During my 20s I was in a warzone and owned by the government. Calm down there sweetheart you don't know what real poverty/hardship even looks like. Living with your parents until you can afford a house was always the norm... smartphones that allow you to get jobs in which you can telecommute and make +60k a year and live anywhere in the world... including places where the housing is cheaper is not the norm. You don't need to get a 2400sq home in the middle of NYC.

[@_vakas]

About ❌️ Aböute ✅️

[@jacksonaddl]

As a 20 something who is soon to start coaching kids, this video was very helpful. Thank you.

[@boney2g]

waddup homie just watched the same vid 😭 happened to see ur comment wtf

[@shannonmercer3017]

I kinda think it's the opposite of what you're saying. You'll never be poorer and more insecure in basically every aspect of life than in you're 20's. You're treated as such as well - unpaid internships, the lowest pay grade you'll ever experience in your life probably. Like the list goes on. Even university grads at the top of their classes can even be head scratching at the end of it (though obviously they are at an incredible advantage even if they fail to realize it). There's also significant evidence based on massive studies that suggest that as we age we have a better feeling about the quality of our lives, call it the rose coloured glasses effect. But either way people report feeling happier and more content with themselves with each consecutive decade. Meaning most 20 somethings do not report feeling good about their situations. And nor should they... They're pretty low on the stratification of money and feeling uncertain about their futures surely. Money is freedom and you have the least amount of it as a young person

[@reynoldskynaston9529]

I love videos like this. I genuinely appreciate the older generation looking out for their younger generation.

[@namdhakcity216]

JJ is the Hank Green from Canada 😂😂😂, Happy Birthday JJ

[@hedgelord0]

life hack: never commit to anything and maintain freedom forever

[@JJMcCullough]

works for me!

[@flermilyxx]

Super insightful. Shared this with a few friends. You're so right, be ambitious and driven by risk when you have that often minimal responsibility in your 20s. I always love these videos where you reflect back on being younger! Thanks for sharing!

[@Truckerboy1234]

Excuse me??? This dude is 40???? I thought he was like… 26

[@AquaSteez]

I’m 26, but my piece of advice when it comes to relationships, don’t ask questions to things you don’t want to know the answers to. Aka “the less I know the better”

[@planningpersonlaidbackdeep1273]

Youll now get a death certificate from grindr lol

[@40nights40daystv]

I’m 26 now going on 27 in 3 months… yeesh… and some regrets haunt me from my early 20s. I went to uni in the middle of nowhere for 3 years in Indiana because my parents pressured me to go to school. I never came out as bi until last year, accepting it was rough cause I grew up very catholic. And I never took the risks to achieve dreams that I wanted in my 20s the way I should’ve because of societal pressures and financial hardships. Here’s the thing though is all of us will leave our 20s with regrets, failures, and dumb choices. It’s in our 30s that we get to take all of that failure and success and make something out of it.

[@richborn6700]

I turn 31 next week and it bothers me less than entering the twilight of my 20s. Getting into a new decade of life is more entertaining than reflection of ones regrets over the prior ten years, ESPECIALLY in your 20s.

[@OfficialWorldChampion]

I disagree with the “hold your tongue” argument…..there is less potential for regret in expressing yourself than in staying silent. Most of the time the worst that comes from speaking your mind is minor embarrassment. (Almost 35 years here)

[@mgore90]

This should be interesting. I met my late-spouse at 22, and was widowed at 34 (6 months ago). What I can only describe as The Hell Phase seems to be coming to a close [most days at least], and I now feel like I've been thrust back into my 20s; not really sure what to do with my life now, either socially, romantically or professionally -- so this video could be useful.

[@LeetHaxington]

I’m 35 and although I generally agree with you I have classic counter points that technically conflict with your points. You said you can and should mostly not be afraid to try things out in your 20s / don’t be afraid to fail. Because failures here don’t matter so much, at least compared to failing in your 40s. While generally true, your path in your 20s sets up how the rest of your life goes. And actually your 20s have some critically important permanent time boxes that change the rest of your life: 1. Date fast and often when you’re young. There’s a couple of life breaking problems if you don’t: The cutoff age for meeting your life partner starts declining at around 23. By 27, you’ve certainly lost over half your opportunities. This means the people left over may be lower quality, already had a divorce (which statistically sets up a pattern), or have other qualities that might make life difficult. Like massive debts. Those who are single may become more and more bitter about it, becoming a self fulfilling prophecy. On the other hand, it’s probably better than rushing into marrying someone you dislike because divorce is devastating financially and for your well being. The other problem is if you find your life partner too soon, you will be cursed with not getting to experiment enough. This is basically an infinitely growing land mine that will go off one day. Best to just set it off early. 2. It’s hard to go back to college and deal with 18 year olds. This is a barrier for most people, but it’s still possible to go back and do college. However, most people just get stuck in their day to day grind that expands with partners and kids and a house and then before you know it you’re completely stuck in the quick sand of life. Try to push yourself to complete things early, and try to avoid things that add to the quick sand pile because they’re either easy or comforting to your life. If you get stuck in a position you dislike, you’re not only going to damage your life, you have a family you care about that you’re also going to damage. 3. Opportunity cost. Basically in your example, working at the TV studio isn’t just wasted time on a nothing career. These skills are pretty directly transferrable to KZbin. If you hadn’t done news or whatever, you might not have explored youtube as easily. For others starting in youtube and trying to go into a TV career, you’re going to be lacking the experience in dealing with BS young employees learn. Especially if you’re self employed and not reporting to a boss. These kind of passive skills have nothing to do with the main field (like filming a News broadcast) but you pick up these things. On top of that, you’re building a documented career path of people who can verify you’re not insane and that you can actually show up and at least mostly do the job you said you could. That’s a big problem for a lot of jobs. If you’re trying to get a job late in life after figuring yourself out but you can’t put up the smoke and mirrors BS of staying late for appearances or even prove that you’re not going to just start harassing the women in the office, then people are going to struggle hiring you. I could go on but this is too long already anyway. The summary is doing the normal flow in your 20s isn’t so bad, and although some risk and exploration is beneficial, you should be strategic in which failures you accept early. If it’s going to be something that consumes your thoughts endlessly, yes do it now so it doesn’t end your built up life later.

[@MK-ih6wp]

You need your own blog! Good insight here.