Loneliness and the Illusion of Connection | Thich Nhat Hanh, 2012.12.13

Our teacher Thich Nhat Hanh talks about loneliness being a problem of our time and that technology only gives us the illusion of being connected with others. Loneliness can be ended by coming home to ourselves, finding self acceptance as we are, before establishing connection with others.
This video is part of an article "Handling our Strong Emotions", you may read the full article at plumvillage.org/articles/hand...
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#ThichNhatHanh #mindfulness #loneliness

[@vickieheather9682]

I have ALWAYS felt something was wrong with me (esp. because I have been told such) for Loving being alone. I feel connection with others harms my relationship with myself. I feel the best when I am with me, alone. My mother and others have told me I never liked being around people. So, I put myself in a career that surrounded me with people and I eventually went crazy. I now hide on the shores of Lake Superior, have few friends and live a nature centered life. I am very happy.

[@chriscoll6493]

Me too. I just moved by myself to Wimington, NC. I make sure to go to the ocean by myself.

[@FormlessUponForm]

It’s called being an introvert. Nothing wrong with that in the slightest.

[@patricialegge2482]

I'm so happy for you, I wish I could find that peace, I never seem to. Sometimes think I have only to find it's an illusion. Peace to you.

[@banzobeans]

The Enneagram wisdom tradition can be quite insightful in such matters, if you wish to give some context to what you've discovered about yourself. Best book imho: "The Complete Enneagram" by Beatrice Chestnut. Introversion comes in various flavors.

[@romefeddi9547]

Your amazing keep shining love and peace

[@kland1309]

I was sitting out back in the sun, looking at the ever increasing ageing wrinkles on the back of my hands, feeling sad, feeling alone. Listening to these words now. Thank you for reminding me that everything is okay. Right now, as it is, it's okay. Thank you.

[@platonicsage1298]

everything is part of the process, a flower is a flower at every stage

[@deuxquatresixhuit]

We're with you there, K :) We're also sitting in the sun, making peace with the loneliness. And we'll keep coming back, every time we drift away, we'll eventually come back ❤️

[@smallstudiodesign]

Congratulations! You made it this far! Getting to higher level of age is a privilege many don’t get to experience.

[@PuBearsticks]

Some people call them aging wrinkles. Ram Dass would call them beautiful.

[@cmickie3296]

You are not alone. You are me, somewhere else in the world. I am here, and you are there, and yet we are one.

[@itssexykandy]

Being lonely is an opportunity never a loss! I only feel the loneliness when I'm around people I don't belong with.

[@JonasAnandaKristiansson]

U/I only feel loneliness when we are not living as our True Self/NoSelf(Buddhism). Only the ego/person is lonely, in the suffering sense of the word loneliness. And of course, what you write has been "my" experience also, G

[@greablood1072]

Well said. Wow.

[@JR-iw8du]

I understand what you mean, I feel the same.

[@StinsonSwarley]

So freaking trueee

[@Mark-hc8ek]

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. --Ralph Waldo Emerson

[@Thefunksoulbro]

What other people think of me, is none of my business.

[@noonespecial4171]

Welcome to Western 'civilization'.

[@Dr_Lucozade]

Stop listening to Elliott Hulse.

[@noonespecial4171]

@@Dr_Lucozade who is that?

[@AdamFerrari64]

Wow. My suffering has come from internal conflicts from this.

[@KrysLynne82]

I have felt more lonely with all the technology we now have than before we had it. I recently deleted all my social media platforms because I could see the addiction of it all, the emptiness of it all. I would rather go for a walk in a park than sitting on my couch looking at Facebook. I would rather talk to a few people who genuinely care than have 800 friends on social media who just look at my pictures and give them a like.

[@dragondreamjln]

I feel exactly the same way. Thanks for confirming there are other real people in the world. much love

[@KrysLynne82]

@@dragondreamjln 💗

[@amyboyd5839]

girl yes, I feel EXACT same, glad I'm not alone in that! I wish I could throw my phone in the lake

[@JakTuSieZyje]

@@KrysLynne82 same, i deleted all social media and i feel like i don't have friends anymore because the friends i ve had were only virtual, same i did with addictions, people don't like to hang out with sober, big up everyone

[@KrysLynne82]

@@JakTuSieZyje hang in there and stay strong. You will meet new friends and start a new life

[@TmaadHMD]

"My dear, loneliness, I know you are there. I hope to take care of you. And you make peace with your loneliness. You make peace with your fear. There is a wounded child in you. You recognize her. You recognize him. And you embrace him, her. Tenderly in your arms. That is the act of going H O M E and taking care of H O M E."

[@BlueskyDenver]

🙏🙏😔

[@yvettetwaters7524]

🌹🙏🏽💝

[@InnerPeaceHarmony]

Very powerful talk! Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but it’s because you lose connection with yourself. “We are lonely together”! Thank you Thay 🙏

[@somanyinsights1670]

So true

[@andrewferg8737]

"because you lose connection with yourself" ---- I would say 'because you lose connection with the source of self'. "For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?" (Mark 8)

Yup, hence why I think people mistake unmet needs for loneliness. As well as boredom coming from the place of feeling you’re not doing something worthwhile, which could indicate you’re not doing what you’re supposed to be doing. Some boredom is just aversion, fear of failure and wanting it to be over already. It’s funny how emotions can feel the same but have different context to them. Without clarity, the context, we mistake in our understanding of our feelings and make the wrong decisions. It’s like trying to describe the colour of an apple as a blind guy. You know it’s an apple, it feels like an apple, but you don’t get the full picture. I mean… loneliness is an emotion that stems from not having your needs met. How can you tell one from the other without context?

[@gfriedman99]

Loneliness is different than solitude. I can be alone and not be lonely.

[@shidehhafezi6826]

For me, it stems from the need to be around people.

[@sarahlouise8904]

I feel like being alone doesn't necessarily mean being lonely. I feel more lonely when im surrounded by those who do not understand me. I feel lonely when I allow my monkey mind to take over. I also feel lonely when I do not feel able 🙌🙌 I absolutely adore this Channel & all the teachings. I hope one day my journey takes me to Plum Village that would be a dream come true 😍

[@adokapo]

"Tako je sine, tako je!" Hako 1975

[@rememberingwholeness6047]

“I feel lonely when I do not feel able”. Thank you for that. Blessings

[@susancarolan153]

What will plum village be without him?🤞💚💜🙏🏼

[@anjaknatz7157]

@@susancarolan153 His spirit will linger there, protecting the place..

[@IaneHowe]

Well said nothing is more lonely than been surrounded by the wrong people.

[@DailyDose926]

Loneliness is my old friend. I like being alone. It's protection of my energy.

[@Kanpratic]

Me too. But please do not hésitate to talk with some good people sometimes. Get out. Take a walk.. You Can practice breathing etc alone too.

[@DailyDose926]

@@Kanpratic Thank you for the advice

[@Liisa_011]

I think he is talking about finding the eternal spring if Life within,that lives those parts if us,so we spend time going" home" our self inside,and accept,connect to the Inner treasures. As I grab another slice of Sourdough flax bread in bed,tired from being on phone-youtube. Had big wave of sad,angry lonely,erotic,needing affection and I feel human love- starved. I sat w feelings as long as I could,noticing how I be become what I am.

[@Kanpratic]

@@Liisa_011 I know and understand this. It is not my question.

[@SA-ww1ge]

U don’t sound lonely just okay or even enjoy being alone. We Can be lonely w or without people around

[@kathleendone8708]

I remember one night in my life where I felt so undone by grief, put my daughter to bed, sat on the settee in my living room and sobbed like a child and said to god "I want to go home" I didn't know what i meant by it or were home was, I just wanted to whisper it out loud. Hearing your words here made me smile. Thank you Thich Nhat HanhI, I think i know what i meant now. and now know how to get there.

[@StinsonSwarley]

This is lovely, I too had moments of cathartic crying followed by insight that made no sense at the time. Is like a release and like your soul is able to grasp and understand things and higher concepts than "you"

[@elisabethpearl9790]

This feeling would over-come me most often when driving......"I want to go home"......I would cry, wondering what/where home is. I have since remembered that I am my home, and within my heart is the connection to the Divine, to myself and to everyone and everything "The way out, is in" Thank you

[@lindaj5492]

I think Thay in this video gives great insight on how “knowing yourself” can protect you from being sucked into co-dependency and form relationships of mutual respect for the other’s identity.

[@SpikesBreakingBread]

There are so many people who are longing for a partner, beautiful empathic people. I wish they find each other❤️

[@PersisP]

or not, so they are pointed in the right direction. Earlthy love is always limited, its in duality and it will end. nothing wrong with it but its both the biggest mirror and strongest attachement and distraction from knowing who we are

[@winonafrog]

♥️

[@christiangasior4244]

Thay speaks to my heart and soothes it. He has moved on, but he is still here for us. We can connect with him through his books and dharma talks. He nurtured so many people who will continue to spread his wisdom at Plum Village and throughout the world. What a blessing he was and continues to be.

[@meboomzxc]

He says you can find him with every in-breath and out-breath. He is always here with us, with every breath

[@mamaksstorytime]

Cannot help missing the sound of his sweet and wise voice.

[@ideafood4U]

"How can you connect with another person if you cannot connect with yourself?"

[@arielleHT]

If i connect with myself it means i am two different people for how can one connect with its own self. your statement is just wrong sir.

[@SarahDale111]

@@arielleHT I'd say most of us ARE divided...taking ourselves to be the ego, which relentlessly distracts us from our true self.

[@merlinporterarts]

@@arielleHT look up inner relationship focusing. OR voice dialogue therapy.

[@SarahDale111]

Though any perceived separation happens within the indivisible whole, so the whole thing is delusional.

[@peacebe2u480]

Even after you learn to connect with yourself, you will still find difficult to connect with others that operate on different wavelength. It is just the way it is...

[@GaneshSubbiah19]

Thank you Sir 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 I lost my beautiful wife to cancer at a young age few months back . Growing up I was always comfortable being alone but this loss had shaken me and I was afraid of loneliness . This teaching helped me to go back to my home ( loneliness) be safe in it 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@helenroach4634]

Take care . She is with you always in spirit ❤

[@Yetipfote]

What I found helps me is from time to time just sitting down with the intention to not do anything for 15 minutes. After a short while my mind will start to wander and produce interesting ideas and a want to act. But I simply say no and continue sitting until my wish to act is so strong that I smile and say yes and go do it. Enjoy.

[@ednaharper2776]

Ever since I was young when ever i was so sad n lonely i went to a river or forest and just sat there in the quietness with myself and i pray

[@brookelynnebluesky4009]

I had no river, but concrete... When I was sad, as a child, I'd go to my backyard window, look up at the clouds and I would pray....

[@TheSoulBlossom]

beautiful

[@taramickeymickeranno8725]

This is great. I was just journaling about how much suffering I cause myself because I’m rarely present. Always having imaginary arguments in my head. Coming home through breath. 💕 yes. Opening my heart to now.

[@nicolerobinson9595]

THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS,TARA! YOU HAVE HELPED ME TO REALIZE THAT DO THE SAME THING. I APPRECIATE YOU!

[@AH-cy4md]

Yes, those imaginary arguments/interactions can be difficult to shut off. I’ve found it interesting to notice how my mind reacts to these imaginary interactions, like it’s real. It can lead to unskillful thoughts and actions, so I’ve found it very helpful to label it “imagining “.

[@noonespecial4171]

If I can suggest listening to the Theravada Buddhist Monk Ajahn Sumedho. His teachings are on youtube from 1979 to this very week, he's still teaching Dhamma at age 88 and his mind is like a crystal. His teachings of the Buddha dramatically helped me along with Thich because Ajahn Sumedho was born American and trained in Thailand in his 30's so is able to describe very clearly what Westerners are dealing with and how to understand that its not 'us' but conditioning, that we are not mind - Anicca, because Western culture tells us to 'be someone' - anyone, just not as you are, as it is. Blessings to you!

[@jingyitay6179]

@@noonespecial4171 I don’t think this excludes any other groups that aren’t western. People get into arguments often. If anything, he’s just introducing new concepts that abrahamic religions and western philosophies muddle up or didn’t touch on.

[@Therika7]

“Yes, it is a mess, and I accept it.” Thank you so much ❤️

[@TerriblePerfection]

I love walking meditation. Time in nature is bliss. I enjoy walking with my husband, but walking alone, without speaking, is another level.

[@annrenee3265]

'Be a home for yourself, be an island for yourself' I love this thought, I see myself in a little boat rowing to a beautiful Scottish island with treesfull of birds and a shore with the waves lapping and the wind blowing gently in the trees. Love is there, love is here~ all around us ❤️✨.. in gratitude 🙏

[@dollywiz]

Someone asked me recently if I could be anywhere in the world, where would that be? I answered “another planet,” but a short time later Plum Village came spontaneously to mind. Somehow I knew it would be a truly calm and safe place. This was a couple of weeks before this lovely man passed. I knew about him over the years, of course, and admired him greatly. But it is only now that he is gone in the material realm that I realize he is the spiritual “teacher” I have finally found at age 74 and a lifetime of spiritual seeking. His authentic beauty, the simplicity of his teaching, his sweetness, is touching me so deeply now. I listen to his meditations, watch his videos, etc. everyday because what he says and how he says it is all I need to hear to come “home” to myself.

[@angelique2653]

I love and have great respect for this beautiful Monk. His wisdom and compassion inspires me. I have been meditating daily for 18 years. It gives me great inner strength. The Way of the Bodhisattva is an inspiring book. Thank you.

[@sylviacarreon9268]

Could you recommend some reading material for this subject?

[@millenniallychallenged5641]

@@sylviacarreon9268 Touching peace and being peace by him

[@nowornever07]

18 yrs..yu r no less dan a SANGHA..👍

[@-_XD]

That is an incredible feat I wish I can achieve. I can hardly sit in meditation for 5 minutes...

[@lararose1634]

In a journey of extreme loneliness & despair, with my compass set to spiritual reprieve for the sake of survival ... it dawned on me that 'alone' is only one stroke away from 'all one'. By surrendering into loneliness, boundaries & concepts of separateness dissolved, & I found myself embraced by Divinity .. in the arms of God. Alone - All One

[@janel342]

Lara Rose That’s beautiful thank you.. i made myself be an extravert when young. So uncomfortable in crowds. Couldnt do small talk. Now I’m 77 with a brain injury in a -pandemic!- been alone apart from a few days working, for 2 years and I actually ache to share my space with another human being .Just to be aware of the presence of someone else. ‘No man is ‘ an island entire unto himself’ ( this is not in the sense ThaY talks about having an island of yourself FOR yourself- then you can help partner/ family better for themselves too. In a capitalist society we’ve been brainwashed into thinking Buying a’ thing’ house/car/ holiday-will mail make me feel better. And it won’t. Being in Right ordering inside yourself will, which in turn brings more compassion out into the world for others around you.🌹 There is that of God in everyone

[@junglelibrary4630]

For the last two years, I have loved being alone and waited for this...I can tell you it is possible to love being alone. It only happened later to me, after I was 49, but when it happened it was a miracle I cannot stop talking about it! I cannot believe such peace and solitude and happiness existed~ pls believe me it does!

[@Collekie]

It is actually the same for me. I always struggled with being alone (even though I need to be alone very regularly, for I am a very sensitive person), yet, now, Since very recently I am also able to be alone and be fine with it. I don’t know what is coming over me, but I’m very happy this is finally happening. And I’m 51. I’m grateful for this.

[@JennaOnTheBeach]

May I ask please, how did you manage it and how did the shift happen? I feel like a shift is taking place but not sure what!!

[@Collekie]

In my case this was a very long proces. It took me years. I spend a lot of time looking inward, to see who I was, away from society, totally alone. I needed to be totally alone (on many occasions , but not always I was also an active human being) so that I would not expose socially accepted behavior, wicht is not necesarilly behaviour that’s good for me. So I got to know myself very well. It was a very painful journey, but in my case it was neccesary. I saw all this qualities I have, all these feelings, the things I find important, care for, make me tick. All my weaknesses and all my strenghts. How all these characteristics interacted with one another and make me balanced or (much more frequently) unbalanced. Gradually and slowly I found a way to deal with my own complicated character, so that I could be me, but not get hurt all the time and not thrown off balance all the time. I dit get help along the way and I asked for help very frequently. I needed it and thankfully it was there :-). Now, finally, at 51, I am a (mostly) peaceful human being, who puts her own well being first. Self care is a very important thing…

[@JessMaccain]

@@Collekie Many thanks for your candid and honest response! This has been pretty much my own journey as well, except that I do not have a choice to totally "break away" (however, Covid has given me a lot of freedom already) as I still need a job to support myself. As a result, I actually sometimes display socially inappropriate behaviours as long as I'm not actually going out and killing people (eg. saying what I really want to say despite going against the grain, saying hurful things to my friend etc.). This in itself is still VALUABLE as these crazy behaviours make me realise that I'm not perfect and I'm not always in control - they actually bring me closer to myself, even though seemingly inappropriate. However, I also know that those inappropriate behaviours would not happen again - as I'm conscious afterwards and learned more about myself in the process.....Still, on a fundamental level, I agree with you - honesty is the hardest but also the best way.

[@yvettetwaters7524]

🙏🏽💝🌹

[@paradoxlove1]

“We are lonely together” I have always felt alone and no one no lover,relationship, friendship has ever proven itself to extinguish that feeling ..I don’t know if all of this evolved in me or I took pieces from the world and constructed myself that way , but It’s never changed and in my 7th decade of life I have decided to embrace this me , this little creation , spending time in this way for now That’s all there is

[@t_s_q]

❤️

[@katrinalivingston5017]

All my life I have always tried to connect with human life and I never felt any amount of satisfaction, but when I lost everyone and what I thought at the time everything I began to meditate. That's when I began to feel alive. I love to connect with myself. Like Thay said, how can you connect with someone else, if you can't connect with yourself. Wow! I see through a different lens and this made so much sense. This should be taught in all schools. Thank you Master Teacher.

[@Jack-ur4in]

So would I be connecting with myself if I put myself first and do all the things I like to do,.. ? That should make me happy ? …but there will come a point that I might want social companionship… someone who can understand and support my point of view, take a shared interest in the things i do. Without this Possibility I wouldn’t feel so happy. I would be living a lonely life even if I’m connecting with myself. I don’t understand this idea of connection. Seems back to front to me ?

[@katrinalivingston5017]

@@Jack-ur4in some people need to reconnect with themselves. Another person shouldn't make you happy, but add to your joy. Enhance what's already there.

[@gudrunforde]

@@katrinalivingston5017 absolute ❤️

[@charmaines7302]

Jefferson Starship said this and so did Jesus. We enter this world alone and that’s how we go out. God can only fill the void.

[@katrinalivingston5017]

@@charmaines7302 please! Don't tell me what and how to practice being whole.

[@omarh789]

I have a feeling this man went down the journey of loneliness and found himself. I love his book the art of communication it really helps me understand and empathize with the suffering of others and myself.

[@maivo7568]

Sometimes I wonder if people have to go down the journey of something to really understand themselves or not. Is there another way of finding ourselves without going down to the bottom...

[@omarh789]

@@maivo7568 In my journey i had to go to what I consider the bottom so I don't know. My suggestion is look at life as a lesson(and learn the lessons), love yourself and have the courage to do the hard things that you know will make your life better and ultimately more happy. Treat others kindly but set boundaries. Respect yourself enough to enforce those boundaries. I wish you well Mai Vo

[@maivo7568]

@@omarh789 Thank you for very kind words. The bottom to me is when I don’t see a reason to live anymore. I’m not good at setting boundaries, or I set too many boundaries even with my family and friends, which makes me feel lonely.

[@user-vt8rx7od3l]

@@maivo7568 sadly I can relate to it..

[@brianalopez4338]

What book if you don’t mind sharing ?

[@vickieheather9682]

Honestly, I never feel alone when I am by myself. I can feel the energies of the universe and myself when I am alone. I feel more full than when I am around other humans. Animals and children are ok, though....

[@TerriblePerfection]

Same here. To just be is blissful. The rest is a distraction. 🥰

[@julieshepherd3650]

Well put.......🥰

[@levity90]

Do you have or want a partner? I feel like I have two very different sides to my personality. One side that is perfectly content being alone and another that wants to share life with someone.

[@GayleCreates]

@@levity90 I feel this too. I want to be able to explore these sides to myself and guilt always comes over me

[@ellanina801]

I’m asexual, so I’ve always felt complete within myself. However, I have always had the desire to have a family, and a partner just to have common ground and extra hands on deck. I feel this more now than ever just because of how corrupt things are. I’m at this point where I want to just go hide in Alaska with my 4 kitties and puppy, but I still feel like my purpose isn’t complete yet. Or maybe I am just holding onto ideas that I’ve always had and I’m not ready to let go.

[@richardlynch6927]

Stay connected to disconnection .that’s what technology has brought us .

[@rorimckenzie237]

Depends how you use it

[@cmickie3296]

@@rorimckenzie237 Depends how it uses you..

[@amberpickett9803]

@@cmickie3296 depends how you let it use you

[@rorimckenzie237]

Edgy

[@cmickie3296]

@@rorimckenzie237 (Edgy) Like Gary Moore.

[@mariantia926]

The heart sutra is beneficial for us to detach the physical self from the illusion world and let us come back to our source. We keep going out, extending out to find, that why we feel lonely, yet everything is within us. No need to find externally. We can be alone but not lonely.

[@tamarakuhn1634]

“The practice of going home to help heal ourself and heal the world”

[@mattkrosch3511]

Being home is the loneliest thing I can think of. When you lose the love of your life, home is never the same.

[@shanemillott5229]

I agree so much I just lost everything including my soul mate of 30yrs.. moving on has been extremely hard for me..I shut down in a matter of seconds. Lost everything, home, car, bestfriend, future of hope for the future. Not sure how to cope and move on..Struggling to be around people.. Anyways, I can go on and on..Doing my very best to still sober at this time...Only have a few months into this new world of sobriety.. thankypu for your posting am not alone

[@BelongsToChrist777]

💜

[@SamStone1964]

@@shanemillott5229 Meditation, just sitting quietly for around 15 minutes every morning soothes the jagged edges.

[@StinsonSwarley]

@@shanemillott5229 a few months late but: you can do it Shane! Just know that this too shall pass and that there are people out here in the world cheering for you! And if you can move out or decorate your house differently to symbolyze your new journey that might help you move on even further, but be strong. You can do this!

[@joannaw1164]

Nothing can replace grief, your profound loss, and the need to grieve. It is brutal and, in my opinion, will forever be a part of your soul. (Though it won't be as intense as it is for you right now) PLEASE find a bereavement support group!!! PLEASE find a sponsor and go to AA meetings as frequently as possible!!! You worked hard for your sobriety. And if you did drink, become sober again right now. Don't judge yourself if you drank. Do NOT sell your home or make any major decisions in your life right now; you are to vulnerable and may intensely regret it later. One day at a time. I think Going Home (new to me, but meditation isn't) is about finding peace and calm within yourself, which is vital. But, you ABSOLUTELY need support from people who can provide comfort and guidance from the loss of your wife. Grieving is not a straight line, it goes all over the place. Everything is relative. BUT, you NEED to be around people right now. 🙏🙏🙏

[@Velvetnoir78]

His voice gets me every time❤ I know he's resting in peace.

[@One_Love_MMLJ]

This message has come at the right time 😃

[@tomasgreen4730]

same

[@kylinitsoftlee2472]

“Togetherness” is but a distraction from aloneness. Loneliness persists until we see that we are one.

[@stevenwhite5560]

can you explain to me this term '' we are one " pls

[@AtortAerials]

I really needed to hear this. Reaffirms my decision too to delete my Facebook account. So tired of so much waste of energy with useless “connections” and “friends” that truly don’t mean a thing. I am lonely and do need to find my way back home….I know it’s a mess but I’m willing to fight for it back. 🙏🏾🕉🙏🏾

[@amandalynngibson8332]

my spirit is also is on the journey to my home inside. most interactions with people (family especially) are draining, or cause me pain or anxiety. Silly wabbit! I choose to say less. do less. breath. be present.

[@ashanair-qj6gk]

The spirit is also on its way home and hence I don't prefer having anyone who is interested in gossip and other things, loved ones feel I am crazy and only difficulties is happening but still I have nothing to ask God because He knows why He has placed this spirit in such a situation

[@jaysonwheeldon9090]

“We are lonely together.” I have never heard it put that was!

[@newgabe09]

Sobbing while listening to this. Been breaking down every day lately, no real idea what triggers it, just allowing it to happen. Ironic that it's my 'distractive - connection machine'- my laptop that has brought me here to such a beautiful homecoming guide. Then my mind recalls a wonderful discussion between this beautiful monk and Ram Das. who asks "how is there a 'connect with self' when there is in Buddhism also a 'no self'?" Don't worry about that question, heart says it will resolve the more we let go to presence.

[@Clearlight201]

Sending good wishes and love to you. "Crying is watering yourself so that you can grow"

[@StinsonSwarley]

I'm so gonna call devices "distractive connection machines" from now on i just thought I should let you know

[@peter22564]

At times we need to stand alone being alone doesn’t have to mean being lonely learn to like your own company and you will never be lonely

[@gnevitt]

I used to hate being alone or at least hate the idea of what being alone meant. I’ve grown to love alone time with myself. The release of pressure, the distance from external, the self awareness is so fulfilling. People are always telling me I should be aiming to be with someone or asking me why I don’t want to be surrounded by people. It’s hard for me to explain but it’s just a sense of pure release. And now I’m practicing to know myself better.

[@jamesgardner9583]

Years of this kind of teaching has helped me.... Brother James 🙏

[@purplemaze7733]

I feel that I am the best version of myself when I am alone. The majority of people annoy me immensely. I am alone, but not lonely.

[@knowledge9822]

Just beautiful! He's always alive in our hearts ❤

[@Rozumarix]

I am very grateful for this post. Again, this is just what I need this exact moment. May Plum Village continue to flourish. Namaste.

[@unapologeticgoddess444]

This is the teaching that changed my life and my view An amazing teacher, mentor, a living BUDDHA live on 🙏🏿

[@aliceningkan322]

Yes his teaching teach me to be a better person. I'm a Christian but i like his teaching

[@kaliwander3479]

How can you not respond with love to this teaching. His gentleness is so powerful 🙏

[@ikigai1236]

I work in nursing homes and many residents are on medications for depression. If only they could hear and receive this transforming teaching from Thay.

[@mlissgay5054]

You are their example ☺️

[@akito7025]

@@mlissgay5054 awwww

[@nishadruna6044]

You, can bring it to them..

[@alsyville]

Being alone and being lonely are separate things. You can be alone but enriched by self love and connection with the Earth around. Loneliness is a terrible burden we feed often; it can bring jealousy, depression, self loathing etc, it is a yearning for something we do not have. Connection comes in many forms. I have spent a life time looking for friendship. Only now am I learning that it starts from within. Once I am able to accept myself, including my faults, then I am ready to take the next step. And if I meet others on my journey, then that is wonderful. If I do not, then I am still on a journey, and that has endless beautiful experiences.

[@extraterrestrialztv2898]

I learned the power of solitude in an American "monastery" for ten years. Returning to the "dunya", world of suffering outside of the "monastery", left me feeling the need to reintegrate with people who had not been forced to look within. I'm grateful to hear this message of reconnecting to self instead of trying, feverishly, to connect with a disconnected social structure. I'm going back inside, y'all.

[@angelahebert4561]

I think this is a beautiful talk. I would not be able to listen to it without technology.

[@windshipboyd6600]

Very true. I was lucky to be the mom of a very small child at Plum Village and therefore be able to sit very close to Thich Nat Han as he spoke 15 years ago. I will never forget the feeling of warmth, comfort and safety I felt from his physical presence. His message is powerful on video and in books and makes it more accessible to many, but it is diluted, the force of presence is so powerful on top of the message.

[@lindaj5492]

I feel very fortunate that Thay embraced the use of technology to share his teachings and invite the world to watch the ceremonies and talks at Plum Village centres around the world - and also uses it to teach us about how technology seduces us into losing our connection with ourselves.

[@hughslevin7120]

This is a truly a wonderful talk I am in awe of this Man He is a wise and wonderful asset to the world The world would be a happier more peaceful place for us all if only people will listen and hear THANK YOU WONDERFUL TEACHER

[@OhHapppyDaay]

We all, every ONE of "us" experience and want the same things. We are all members of ONE body. One consciousness. There is only ONE of "us". You are not the thoughts, you are not the mind, or the body. Don't believe mortal mind trickery. Love is everywhere. You are the Love you crave.

[@levihan3777]

Thich Nhat Hanh seemed like such a tender and sweet person. I love listening to his talks, because his voice is soothing and helps connect me to these concepts.

[@evaschmid1919]

Deepest thanks ever dearest Thich Nhat Than you are my ever teacher to be

[@kathleenhowe8134]

This talk is so loving and powerful, all therapists would benefit from hearing and practicing, in order to best help others

[@catherinewilson1079]

“The way out is the way in”. What a beautiful man! What a blessing to many he has been❣️

[@TheHeinrichSymposium]

There is a beautiful book from Osho called 'The Only Way Out is In'.

[@janedoe09]

I am at home, but it is not peaceful...I'm feeling quite lost in this troubled world. I live with gratitude for all I have been given...it's the energy and drive to find purpose and meaning...a passion if you will.... it is the lacking of no family or friend connections that come with age as people go their own ways in life....Spring is around the corner, this brings me hope. Sending out Prayers For All's Highest Good~~

[@gabrielkehdi1412]

This washed me with such a light feeling of wholeness! I feel safe for the first time in a while. Thank you very much, I am very grateful for this teaching 🙏🏽

[@infintehaertmind]

Wow , this is synchronicity, woke up 3 am had a up and down week. Looked on why keep waking early morning one source said prayed for direction So I did that and when back to sleep. Woke up made coffee went back bed thought check KZbin for insight and this was first video on my page. I know all the issues from psychological perspective but thank universe help me see succinctly simplicity of life amen

[@jackiebooth6227]

This is truly a conversation with us by a wise guide. Thay’s reference to the vacuum within us even when we are with another person is giving me the link to why I have - probably my whole life- felt this way. And by mention of the body of breath lungs and lungs being what makes us at home in our body brings me back to remembering how it was that my sister who had polio and had to frog breath to force her lungs to work so she could breathe to talk. Was a miracle.

[@priscilla9995]

Wow, beautiful. When you are at home with yourself, this will be reflected on to others which will guide them to be at home within themselves. And as a result, we have a beautiful collective society aka 'home' where acceptance, non-violence, compassion and peace is all around. “As large as the universe outside, even so large is the universe within the lotus of the heart. Within it are heaven and earth, the sun, the moon, the lightning, and all the stars. What is in the macrocosm is in this microcosm.“ -The Upanishads

[@anapartage]

His voice healing that’s beautiful thanks for this moment 😊

[@weggyweston1259]

Tears, this guy is so real, no words.

[@Ms.Delphine1204]

I only experience loneliness when I’m surrounded by others. When I’m alone I feel amazing and most like myself.

[@Ms.Delphine1204]

@Mind Blown 😂 i think y’all are doing the MOST with my comment. I never said anything about ALWAYS feeling loneliness when surrounded by others nor did I mention races or romance loneliness. I said I ONLY experience it when… like in situations at work or family reunions. When I’m with good friends or immediate family members I feel great. I’m an introvert and being around many that are not “my people” makes me feel exhausted and over stimulated after a bit and all of the noise makes me feel like I’m drowning. I have to retreat to recharge. Good grief lol

[@key9687]

Am just watching this one. And thanks to Tich Nhat Hanh in this very message for the people. Telling the people of the messages known from Buddhist times and being open and kind to all people. Maybe someday we can meet. That is not reaching out from loneliness but sometimes positve directions can occur.

[@skiphoffenflaven8004]

Absolute truth and I am glad I awoke to this understanding so many years ago as I now watch the social media platforms (TikTok, FB, IG, etc…) and the mockery of connection and love on display every second of every day.

[@TOGAB]

He is not just my brother, he is one of my heroes and he is missed. I just thought I was tough, this man IS tough in the best way. Comforting a distressed disciple frightened and dying of cancer, "I am frightened brother", to which brother Tich responded, "Yes, but can you sit with me here in peace". I couldn't forget those words if I wanted to now because it says everything about existence in a few words. Only an enlightened Master would chose those words in response to that situation, the perfect words. He's the best.

[@laurathurlow3634]

This is what they should teach in the schools! How to connect with oneself and the Field!! How to reach heart coherence and stay there as long as possible. Ah Thich Nhat Hanh, thank you for your beautiful graceful life.

[@glaight6362]

Thank you so much🙏

[@LikeHae-wp5bj]

Thank you for your buddhist teachings of lighting a small candle life changing. My kids can't argue with the small amount of time 15 minutes cleaning compared to their computer time of 2 hours. That feng shui sector can be positive now. Anxiety relieved🤩💯

[@nicholaslash8760]

"Be an island unto yourself..." that is a great way to explain it.

[@ziziroberts8041]

Breathing in, I know that I am alive. Breathing out, I send the joy of this moment to the world.

I think people also often mistake the feeling of unmet needs with loneliness. It feels similar, you feel left out, incomplete, agitated, a little sad and a tad of shame/guilt. Shame often because we think we have to meet some standard of happiness or success. Guilt because we feel we are the cause of our own predicament. They go hand in hand.

[@carenkurdjinian5413]

Simple ..calm and nice ... beautiful talk ....🌞

[@JeffersonDeLisio]

🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 so grateful to you Thay. The world misses you.

[@kathrynbromfield9248]

Thank you so much ❤️

[@kriseskesen]

I needed this video right now 💙

[@bridgetmccoy5725]

Love to you from Texas Master Thay 💐🙏

[@victoriacrawford3021]

Thank you beloved Thay.......thank you.

[@larrybeckham6652]

One of the great spirits of our time.

[@LegallyBlondeCritic]

Very Powerful!!!

[@VivaLaVila609]

I can feel the love in your heart. Your words must be remembered forever.

[@joycekepic8947]

I needed this right now I have a large problem being alone I was in a people business for many years surrounded by many people every day and now that I am much older and almost retired I find myself alone much more and I have a big problem with that I need to learn how to be by myself and like it

[@ursulaansbach2244]

Technology has hypothesized us and we need to set ourselves free

[@manujohn99]

😂😂🤣🤣🤣

[@babygirlfemale6507]

Yes it has hypothesized AND hypnotized!

[@yx-z1038]

@baby girl female @ursula ansbach You are right !!!!! Thank you👍😎👏👏 The laughing idiots don't understand that until there dead.

[@aloevera7422]

Back to the caves!!!!! Seriously no critical thinking is present when you say this. Tools and instruments are merely that - means to an end.

[@manujohn99]

@@yx-z1038 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@rhmikemizo2320]

Thanks to KZbin founder for this kind of wisdom. I'm Christian but I love this kind of Buddhist teaching

[@LeonGalindoStenutz]

Lovely. Most genuine buddhists, including Thay, focus more on practice, presence, and action than ideology or "religion" -- labels matter far less than genuine connection, kindness, and love (metta). Blessings.

[@mirjambussinger9188]

Thank you so much ♥️♥️🙏

[@amyboyd5839]

how is he describing my exact life? spot on. love this, how simple and clear hid teaching is ♡♡♡♡ Thank you

[@geovaniavaninha2640]

Hi Thich Nhat Hanh! Wherever you are, I always think on you and thank you for all the teachings you gave us, gave me. Mindfulness and compassion have helped me a lot during my journey in this world. I feel much more calm and happy since I began to listen to you and follow your wise advices. Namastê!!!🙌❤

[@angelinasouren]

Oh, when I saw this in my recommendations, I was delighted, but then I saw that this video is from 2012, so I went to the Plum Village site for an update - as I had not checked for a while - and I understand that Thay is still on his journey of recovery. All the best to him and those around him.

[@roselimonta]

recovery from? i have not finished the video

[@angelinasouren]

@@roselimonta Stroke. He's meanwhile passed away.

[@leftoverpastaful]

Thank you so much. I really needed this🙏

[@et4330]

I would agree with it. Beautiful talk and thank you so much for sharing it with us ☝🏼

[@zorbamindfulness]

Thank you Thich Nhat Hanh for these healing words on acceptance before connection. Gracias. 🙏

[@bibiderennes]

🌕 Au bon moment, merci ! 🙏

[@radicalhonesty3628]

As I watch this video what arises in me are feelings of powerlessness and hopelessness. I am filled with terror and grief and rage.

[@loveandreamore]

Exactly what I needed right now thank you💓

[@bobbycalor]

The teachings of the buddha are eternal. The teachings of zen master Thich Nhat Han are still present. Maha karuna 🙏🏼

[@susanwale8887]

Thank you so much Thich Nhat Hanh for your true and deep message 🙏🏻❤️

[@paradoxlove1]

Wherever you reside right now, the world will be blessed to have you again in some way You were so beautiful gentle powerful monk

[@shodopoet]

Thank you for everything Thay 🙏🏼