MAKING FRIENDS IN GERMANY | My Experience Abroad

[@wernholttempelhoff9301]

Nobody in Germany will ask a person he is not familiar with "how was you day?" 😂😂😂 This idea is very funny for Germans because it's a very American kind of small talk that doesn't exist here. So better don't expect such a question. Instead of smalltalk ask questions about things you need to know. Wether it is better to go by bike or by bus to school. Where is the best ice cream shop in town, is there a café or kiosk near the school. Which baker is good? What can you do on Sundays? And so on. Most Germans are helpful and grateful when they can talk to you about factual topics and when they are not asked such intimidating small talk questions like about their right to live, or "how their day was", 😂😂😂 .

[@greenjacketman9321]

Als ich für vier Wochen in den USA bei einer Gastfamilie gelebt habe, war ich nach kurzer Zeit so genervt, weil ich alle zwanzig Minuten irgendwo gefragt wurde "How are you?" Ich typisch deutsch habe mir natürlich jedes Mal Gedanken gemacht, wie es mir gerade geht und welche Formulierung das am besten ausdrücken könnte. Bis ich dann nach zwei Tagen gecheckt habe, dass das einfach nur eine oberflächliche Begrüßungsformel ist und die Antwort eigentlich keinen interessiert 😂

[@Volvoxx]

First comment 😊 Like your „Alles hat ein Ende, nur die Wurst hat Zwei“ sign in the background 😍

[@tomgroenbeck7620]

Having grown up in Nuernberg I always thought that originated in the Cologne area, not Bavaria, but I may be wrong.

[@chrisMuc1966]

Not to forget: Das ist das Haus vom Nikolaus.

[@MontanaShowalter]

danke! I need a new phrase this one has been up for so long!

[@Volvoxx]

@@MontanaShowalter Wie gefällt dir "Was du heute kannst besorgen, das verschiebe nicht auf morgen."? Another german classic 😊

[@Volvoxx]

oder "Morgen, morgen nur nicht heute sagen alle faulen Leute."

[@Schwuuuuup]

"Alles hat ein Ende nur die Wurst hat zwei" 😂😂😂

[@flippedcolours9247]

what is this suppose to mean, i tried to translate it but still didn't get the joke 😆

[@Schwuuuuup]

@flipped colours It is an a bit outdated German expression without a real meaning. You say it in a comforting way, when something nice comes to an end. "everything has an ending" as in "I know how you're feeling, it's something we all had to accept at some point" and to give it a funny twist you add "only sausages have two" (there is not a distinct start-piece and an end-piece of a sausage but only two end-pieces) But I make it look too serious, you would not say it about something really troubling. But there is a old song by "comedian" Stephan Remmler from 1987 where he sings about breaking up when you realise that the relationship is not what is was... I don't know if this is the origin of this expression or if it existed prior to the song kzbin.info/www/bejne/a2mVd6WAlqmAhc0 The song goes: "Everthing has an end only sausages have two, yes my darling, it is over. But you don't have to be sad, because you won't be alone for long" (she will have a new lover right away)

[@flippedcolours9247]

@@Schwuuuuup omg thankyou for explaining this much. i understand the first part and the last part that you metaphor it as a lover ,but still didnt get it about the "sausages have two" 😂 what two? or theres no real meaning on it? like what you say in the beginning

[@Schwuuuuup]

@@flippedcolours9247 the sausage has two ends the left part of the sausage is one "end", and the right part of it is the other "end"... and if we talk about Suasages, think "hotdog"

[@flippedcolours9247]

@@Schwuuuuup aaaaaahh i see 🤣🤣 Thankyou so much for telling me, i really appriciate it! i can sleep well tonight lol 😆

[@georgesmith7988]

You have a million dollar smile and you seem so friendly.

[@julianhollmann3757]

You said it yourself, once you get behind the walls, you see the person. So we Germans aren't cold, we are reserved. Being over friendly like you Americans seem to us, is something we sometimes find to be an ugly trait. It gives us a feeling of dishonesty, while our walls are as we are: direct and for strangers sometimes painfully honest. Does that make sense?

[@B.A.B.G.]

That's exactly right.

[@julianhollmann3757]

@yoohyeon's paboo it is always problematic to generalize. But Montana's video was about her experiences and stereotypes. I tried to explain what in Germany is seen as an American stereotype. And fake friendliness is on the forefront.

[@100100freak]

@yoohyeon's paboo don’t let stereotypes fool you many people here are very nice. I went to many mediterranen countries for holiday and never thought the difference in terms of friendliness was big

[@julianhollmann3757]

@yoohyeon's paboo Let's start at the beginning: Read my comment slowly. 😉 It is about 'over' and 'fake'. Friendliness in itself is something we need and want. Most people in Germany are friendly and helpful, and react to that positively. Again: It is overdoing something that repels us. It is a German trait to be not too welcoming at first, but as Montana said, you have to put some afford into it and can get friendships that last a lifetime.

[@jessicaely2521]

You are overstretching. Yes Germans are cold jerks. It doesnt take much to smile at a person and strike up a small conversation. You never ever know what that stranger is going through. A simple smile from someone can make someone's day. You dont know that waiter at the restaurant might be the only human contact an old person gets. If they dont have kids (or kids dont care about them) striking up a conversation will make their day. Saying How was your day could make an old person's day. Living in Germany was completely miserable. I couldnt break down the walls to get to know people. I'm not the kind of American that strikes up a conversation with a stranger.The only reason I did ok in Switzerland (Switzerland is the same) is because of my husband. Hes Swiss and had friends. His friends saw me as their friend right away for some reason. You also gotta realize our ancestors had absolutely no one when they moved to the US. The over friendliness was to make the foreign to feel at home. People need friends and they need people to talk to outside their family. It's part of what humans need. When you are brand spanking new in a country and and you aren't good at the new language it's hard to make friends. Small talk and being overly friendly makes foreigners feel like they belong. It's not being fake. Its saying one of our family members were new and we know how hard it can be. Since we are this way with foreigners we're like this with people who were born and raised in the US. If we weren't like this with everyone; then yes it would be fake.

[@liamodonovan6610]

Just found you're channel and i thought you were german when i came across your channel but i realized you were an exchange student you're beautiful love you and Love your honesty awesome video

[@pablo_escanor1681]

“Montana”

[@Theo_T.]

Hi Montana, es liegt aber auch an einem selbst. Ich bin sehr introvertiert, habe 2 oder 3 richtige "Freunde", Für die würde ich alles tun, ja, alles, solange es erlaubt ist. Alle anderen in meiner Freundschaft sich dann doch eher "gute Bekannte", mit denen ich zwar gut auskomme, die mich aber nicht für irgendein Problem nachts um 3 Uhr wecken dürfen. Meine Schwester ist anders. Extrovertiert. Die wird von wildfremden Menschen angequatscht, die trinken ein Bier zusammen und schon ist es der/ die "neue" beste Freundin/ bester Freund.

[@olivermath5275]

I like your Videos in English and in German 👍😊

[@m8k1shaiz8]

Hope we can keep the numbers down till Autumn, so that you don‘t have to cancel your travel plans.

[@jojo_fromthevault]

Hi lots of love from Germany ❤❤

[@TheChillaTV]

Thank you for your insights. I’ve never experienced it for myself that some exchange students like you came into my class. I’m going to study in 2 months and then I definitely have to meet new people. I would love to meet exchange students etc. because I love to hear about different cultures and build up my english skills…

[@wora1111]

Search for YFU or AFS or the programs she mentioned. These groups always are looking for people that are interested in exchange programs or hosting exchange students

[@Sockenmodulator]

Hi Montana, I finally visited your German home base in Passau a few days ago. You were really lucky because the old town of Passau is really very beautiful and unique. On the one hand, Passau is also a typically German (smaller) city with a historic core and many beautiful churches and castles all around, quite similar to Heidelberg by the way. On the other hand, Passau - at least when it's sunny - also has a rather Italian flair, which is due to the fact that there is so much water all around, but mostly due to the architectural style, which is very Mediterranean and unusual for Germany. Except maybe in Wasserburg, which is a kind of miniature Passau... When you come back to Germany, I'd recommend visiting such smaller cities with historical sights or going hiking in the Alps. Bigger cities like Berlin, after visiting the main sights, which is done in a few days, are really only worth it for partying in clubs or festivals, but you can forget about that at the moment (or forever?) because of Corona...

[@MontanaShowalter]

It is so nice! and thank you for the ideas :)

[@hajotge12]

Montana, you nailed it!

[@boyanr2d229]

I live in germany for 11 years now. If it was the only country in the world, I don't know if I'd still be motivated enough to stay alive. I wanna move out SO BAD...

[@carokarotte]

In which region in Germany do you live? The parts of Germany are really different. In the south it’s very traditional, in the western more modern and industrial, and the east is a bit behind the other parts. The northern parts relate more to the Scandinavian flaire

[@njibra7666]

Du tust mir leid

[@Tb40556]

Lovely video and cultural insight as always ;)

[@MontanaShowalter]

thanks trevor! :)

[@achimschroter8046]

You must be a truly optimistic person launching a video right before the soccer final 😀

[@nadal1275]

as if a woman in the states knows when england plays italy, even if its the final ;)

[@germanherman2869]

@@nadal1275 bro if that's not a troll you're actually 0 IQ

[@chrisMuc1966]

Soccer is not a big subject in the USA. American football has much more priority.

[@Chettri14zeni]

@@nadal1275 dude spittin facts ;)

[@melindar.fischer5106]

@@nadal1275 that comment shows how little you know about women in the USA. 🇺🇸❤️⚽

[@hendrik5041]

Can you make a video about how you arrived and what the check in was at the airport?

[@lordmombey]

Such a good video!

[@MontanaShowalter]

Thank you!!

[@Rick2010100]

It´s nice and charming if a unknown friendly dog caresses you legs, until you notice that he just lifted his leg and pissed on your shoes. So Germans usualy keep unknown people in a safe distance, until they knew them and their intension better.

[@Paulettchen]

I don't know If you did this already, but how about a Video about things that you expected about Germany before you went there and If they were true or not

[@juricarmichael2534]

Hi. Being open for everything should be a basic for your whole life, stay curious. For exchange or life: it is, what you make of it. If you suppose some people don't know their impact on your life: Tell them!! Life's too short, to wanna be everybodie's darling. But it would be nice to tell the poeple you like or love, about your feelings. Not only on Valentine's Day, Mother's Day or Christmas. Sadly i realised that at an much older age than you now. But who am i, telling you these things, maybe i'm wrong. Try to talk with a "Vertrauensperson"/ person you trust completly about that. Bye

[@nathanjaerhard7352]

How to make Friends in Germany: 1. Understand that Germans take friendship VERY seriously. That isn't a topic to be taken lightly here. 2. Connect through HOBBIES, and the same interests, like musik, sports, cooking, knitting (Vereine!) Always follow, were the germans disapear to... :-) 3. Ehrenämter: Connect with other people who want to commit oneself to the same cause, like saving animals, human rights, soup kitchens, etc. 4. Local independent churches. They are often very family like and warm hearted and welcoming to strangers. 5. Try going to pubs with germans. When drinking beer, germans loosen up. I personally as a german don't like alcohol, but at least go to the pub and drink something else!

[@alexdreFalke]

Being put in 10th Grade at age 17 isn't even all too bad. A guy in my class (10th Grade) is actually close to turning 18. Also one of my friends was put in 5th Grade and lived with a 5th Grade Exchange student in France once. Idk how she did that or how that happened but it did lol. Interesting Video as always, keep it up!

[@bythealex3455]

yes I finished 10th grade and I'm 18 😂 oldest in my class. they were 15-16 years old

[@calvin9436]

Ich unterscheide auch sehr strikt zwischen Bekanntschaften und Freundschaften. Just for safety reasons not to get hurt.

[@MetrakitProRaceII]

I know from a old Video that your mum ist vietnamese. i found a interesting KZbin Channel with a Guy who walk the streets in saigon at night and this was pretty interesting how much life is in every smallest Hidden street. I would really like to see it one day. Do you think to visit it one day ? Can you speak a little bit ?

[@yannikubben2043]

Hey :) First of all its interssting to hear this topic, I live in Germany at the northsea. I could say it strongly depends on the people. Im studying now and I had very good friends from the 2 to 5 Semester, but as they all where gone or finished, I did get new friends but they betrayed me and so I now have nobody left...yeah. They say all I'm too friendly :/

[@Celeste-cc3hu]

Oh I can relate

[@yannikubben2043]

@@Celeste-cc3hu Yeah it`s such a strange thing and I often think what is wrong with them...?

[@Celeste-cc3hu]

@@yannikubben2043 i guess we should just stop trying to figure that out cuz we'll just end up beating ourselves up every time

[@sirkerzenhalter8191]

Making friends in Germany is hard indeed ~A 20 y/o German 😅😂

[@hajotge12]

Yes. It's about "cracking the nut" as Montana phrases it. We know it as Germans too, when we move to a different town. But there is an upside to it: If a US American says he'll take a bullet for you and a German does ... the difference is, the US American says so the German will do so. (Jacob Applebaum said something along those lines; i tried to find it but did not succeed ... so in my world Jacob Appelbaum said something along those lines)

[@Celeste-cc3hu]

Haha ich bin auch 20 and hab keine Freunde

[@FelixvonMontfort]

Have you visited some Austria Places?

[@MontanaShowalter]

yes! we went to a few cities, and my favorite was Wien!

[@fabianh.5848]

I'm German and don't know how to do it myself ...

[@TreverxD]

I have no friends

[@koperrepok7926]

:(

[@QuikkNic]

😎👍

[@flippedcolours9247]

imagine that little 10 years old girl you mentioned watching this: 👁👄👁

[@MontanaShowalter]

hahaha

[@mauertal]

If an US student studies in Canada..........ist Canada "abroad"?????

[@MontanaShowalter]

Yes, but not many people do because it is so similar to the US!

[@mauertal]

@@MontanaShowalter What do u mean? Not many people study there ....or not many people say "abroad" if studying there?

[@schornsteinsteiger7184]

Bin ich die einzige Deutsche die sich solche Videos anguckt. Indenen Amerikaner über Deutschland sprechen? 😂

[@fabio1712]

Denke die meisten hier sind Deutsch.

[@julianhollmann3757]

Man muss doch wissen, was der 'Feind' über einen denkt. 😁

[@B.A.B.G.]

Nee, wir sind auch noch da. @Fábio Freitas: Wahrscheinlich haben Sie Recht.

[@juricarmichael2534]

Nein! Next question! 😉🙂

[@you2bevsgoogle]

Please,talk englisch here.Thank you.😂

[@dirkwa6172]

👍🏼

[@Ivy-up9lz]

do u like living in germany more than US??

[@MontanaShowalter]

agreed 😂

[@didivatzki5915]

👍

[@wesprog9809]

auf deutsch Freunde finden auf englisch Freunde machen :D

[@MontanaShowalter]

oops! danke :)

[@anakinluecke6510]

🤙🏻

[@vbvideo1669]

🙃

[@rallischu1573]

Dass Deutsche kalt sind stimmt. Habe gerade nachgemessen: nur 32 Grad Körpertemperatur!

[@marcogerner132]

😂👍

[@janheinbokel3969]

Oh, Montana, please come Back to Germany

[@berndgaal7689]

It would be helpful if you could talk a bit slower!!!! Not all your viewers are native speakers.

[@berndgaal7689]

Germans should learn more english !! We need the americans!!

[@andresjustus160]

Ich dachte immer, dass Austauschschüler mit ihren Gast-Geschwistern zur Schule gehen. Das war bei dir wohl nicht so,oder? (I always thought exchange students share class with their host siblings. But you didn't ?

[@kilsestoffel3690]

Exchange oder Austausch ist wahrscheinlich der falsche Begriff für diese Art von Auslandssemester oder -jahr. In der Schule hatten wir tatsächlich einen Austausch: unsere Klasse war 2 Wochen in Frankreich, wir haben bei den Familien der Schüler einer dortigen Klasse gewohnt. Wir haben auch zwei oder drei Tage Unterricht mitgemacht, die anderen Tage wurden wir mit Ausflügen beschäftigt. Ein paar Wochen später sind die französischen Schüler bei uns gewesen. Die "Exchange" Programme, mit denen man ein halbes oder ganzes Jahr im Ausland verbringt und auch tatsächlich vollwertig zur Schule geht, "tauschen" die Schüler nicht direkt aus. D.h. man muss keinen Schüler aufnehmen, wenn man daran teilnehmen möchte. Ich schätze, es sind eher staatliche Verträge, die vereinbaren, dass jährlich so und soviel Schüler aus Land X in Land Y zur Schule gehen und umgekehrt. Je nach Veranstalter sind diese Programme recht teuer und evtl. bekommen die Gastfamilien auch Geld für die Beherbergung und das Durchfüttern des Schülers

[@wora1111]

Das wird angestrebt, passt aber nicht immer, insbesondere wenn die Deutschkenntnisse fehlen. Auch die Fachkenntnisse sind oft sehr unterschiedlich. Von Deutschland in die USA ist es deutlich einfacher. Insofern haben Leute wie Montana sehr viel geleistet, wenn Sie ein Jahr in Deutschland waren.

[@leecherlarry]

warum du kein deutsch sprechen

[@kussdiggi2726]

warum schreibst du kein Deutsch?

[@kilsestoffel3690]

Warum sollte falsches Deutsch einfacher sein?

[@leecherlarry]

@@kussdiggi2726 v=lqa8Q__H6c0 😁

[@abalada]

Es gibt auch Videos von Montana auf deutsch. Und ihr Deutsch ist auch ziemlich gut.

[@wtsalive8210]

1st we have to talk about the steps of a relationship and the deep meaning of the steps and their words. Here the German list of relationships: Fremde, Bekannte, Kameraden, Freunde and beste Freunde The translation: Fremde = foreigner, stranger(same meaning) Bekannte = acquaintance, friends(and here is the big difference) Kamerad = companion, fellow, mate Freunde = Friends Beste Freunde = best friends The deep meaning: Foreigners, it’s the same meaning acquaintance, friends and here is the big difference! The meaning of friends is very different! Mate/fellow it could be a room mate, class mate or club mate….you have one or a few same interesting and you work together Freunde/Friends this is a deep long time relationship. You share secrets, help each other and you spend much time together. Therefore you need a deep knowledge of each other and that take a longer time. Best friend, well that is a person you can walk together through fire. She/he is always there, when you need really help, keep the deepest secrets, say the truth in a positive way, share joy and sadness, too. So it will take a time to become really friends and it’s serious thing for Germans. An other reason, Montana told it already, is the group bubble. In Germany we have an other school system. Each pupil has their own classroom. The teachers come to there and not the pupils to the teacher. So in every stage the same pupils are together the whole time when they were in school( that can change a bit in the higher grades) The mentality of Germans are like this: There is a stranger, let’s check him/her what kind of person he/she is. And if the person is ok: "Come close, guy.“

[@TheRealChaosQueen]

Classroom system did apply to my primary school, and the 5th and 6th grade of my gymnasium. From 7 on we had allllll the classes changing rooms in the breaks because we had topic related rooms especially for biology, chemistry, physics, history

[@wtsalive8210]

@@TheRealChaosQueen Yes, you are right. In past it was the same with me. Always if we need special things, we had to move to a special room. Physic, chemistry, sport and sometimes for biology or Sprachlabor we had to move, but the meantime we were in our classroom. Physic and chemistry I had in the higher grade(Obersekunda, Unter-und Oberprima….was für Bezeichnungen 😂, 11, 12, 13)