Managers, what's the fastest you've had to fire a new hire?

[@tvol322]

Things like the anaphylactic shock joke help solidify that Spark is a genuine person and not an AI or speech thing. Always reassuring

[@weylinwest9505]

Refreshing!

[@extremchiller410]

really funny but got me of guard. kleaning a keyboard sucks

[@raeganhayes1366]

Ive always been looking for a channel like this that didn't use an AI voice

[@WackoMcGoose]

@@raeganhayes1366 EmKay and rSlash are the main OGs of reddit recapping, but yeah, most of the imitators seem to phone it in with AI. You can really tell from the format of the video, trying to imitate the gradual-reveal-of-text style while having a really bad robot voice...

[@frogger8792]

You might like The Click and Vincey as well

[@xegin1572]

I wasn't the one doing the firing, but she didn't even make it to the first shift. I was working at a daycare, I'd been told the new girl would be working with me for her first day, when I arrived at work, I was told she'd been fired before even showing up. Basically, since she was recomended by her aunt, a well respected employee, the boss only did the background check as a formality after hiring her. She was a convicted child abuser...

[@victoralexandervinkenes9193]

YIKES

[@squiddwizzard8850]

Honestly fire her aunt, assuming she knew

[@markwilson4078]

I would be questioning that aunt to be quite frank. She’s a well-respected employee, sure, but the fact remains that she still has a convicted child abuser in her family. That can’t go unnoticed. Of course, reason I say question and not outright fire is because it is entirely possible the aunt didn’t know that was going on. We don’t know how close they were, so it’s possible this could have happened far enough away that that information didn’t reach her. That or if she did know, ask if the aunt was complicit in the abuse. Could be she had nothing to do with it and had the unfortunate task of trying to get that person back on their feet in an effort for them to turn over a new leaf. If that happened then it shouldn’t be enough to fire the aunt, but enough to get second opinions on anything she recommended. Only if the aunt knew and was complicit in the child abuse should this be enough to fire her. It’s kind of like the hierarchy of being a money mule where many start as unwitting and then overtime some turn into complicit money mules. I say it that way because at least those who remained unwitting would stop communicating with their scammers once they learned what they were doing was illegal; meanwhile, complicit money mules know what they’re doing, continue to do it, and even recruit new money mules into their schemes.

[@xegin1572]

@@markwilson4078 She was questionned, and around a month later she was gone for unrelated reasons, officially that is. As of why she recommanded her niece despite knowing, she was in total denial about the whole thing, for her it was all a big misunderstanding, her niece is someone who'd never do something like that and anyone who'd just take the time to listen to her niece's side of the story would realise it.

[@markwilson4078]

@@xegin1572 Ah okay! In that case, I would say the right thing was done here. Thank you for clearing that up!

[@szaka9395]

On the other spectrum. One guy showed up for a job interview. Well. OK. But we didnt plan any. Turned out he walked in to wrong facility, but as we needed people, we hired him on spot. God, that was so funny. We called him tourist for few days :D

[@maxfan1591]

I used to work in HR for an organisation with offices around the country. One day we were contacted by a manager in one city to ask about one of his staff (Fred) who had been on sick leave. Fred had apparently turned up in our office in another city 600 kilometres away, saying he was now well and ready for work and that God had told him to come work here. The manager in that city, rather than tell him to go away, gave him a desk and a job...

[@regankappers]

Happy accidents!

[@regankappers]

@@maxfan1591LOL, WHAT??!

[@maxfan1591]

@@regankappers "LOL, WHAT??!" ikr?

[@valenciageode25]

Story 4 it’s really good that they fired her. “You’ll see” sounds like she was going to poison allergic coworker to prove it wasn’t real. And the Story 12 girl should’ve applied for a Groomer Job.

[@mmayfield1994]

Yea that girl in story 12 wasn't bright

[@jessh5310]

I got paid for sleeping for 6 hours at work. I was called as a standby driver at 4am. arrived ready and raring to go only to be told make yourself comfortable in the canteen. Several mugs of tea later i dozed off in the corner. was woken at 11am and sent out delivering. Got paid 15 hours. WIN WIN

[@angelpandadaylane4924]

Jessh unless someone catches you, on the job…

[@jessh5310]

@@angelpandadaylane4924. The supervisor actually said get your self comfortable and if we want you to do a run we will wake you. One of them jobs where it was actually cost effective to have a driver sat around than miss a deadline. many times I spent the day there for 10 hours reading my book.

[@liamevans7661]

@@angelpandadaylane4924catches you sleeping, while waiting as a standby driver? There’s nothing to do. It’s not like productivity is affected negatively.

[@Rapscallion2009]

I've had a job like that. You're paid to wait so you're immediately available, and they don't care what you do whilst you wait. For a driver, snoozing so you're well rested makes safety sense

[@johnermactavish1162]

One of my first jobs was transporting engineers and conductors for two major rail roads. They have crazy strict rules about work hours for those guys and when they hit their limit the train stops. Period. So they needed us to go drop of replacements and retrieve our weary warriors. Thing is I always assumed trains were super high tech GPS big busy room with tons of screens monitoring everything. NOPE. Hand radios and lots of paper work and eyeballing out the ass. I would get called out to standby a yard for a train to get built and follow them. Got there at 3am. 2:45pm they tell me they aren’t going to need me today and to go home LOL. Paid the entire time to play on my phone.

[@bilindalaw-morley161]

The sad thing about #12 is the girl, as well as acting from POV of loving dogs, probably thought she was being "proactive, showing initiative, and being "a self starter". She'd be a great volunteer at a shelter once she learns to take direction. Also I haven't worked or applied for a job in 25+ years so I'm horrified that all the BS phrases were so memorable!

[@Schinshikss]

The girl literally applied for a wrong job. She should have been working for an animal beauty salon, or a boarding kennel that does groom the dogs instead.

[@TheAzulmagia]

I feel like coming to an adult store and seeing a ninja at the cash register would probably encourage some repeat customers.

[@sistermadrigalmorning233]

I know, I'm surprised someone with such a lack of humor owns an adult store.

[@unconditionallyvalid]

Can't wait to hear this story

[@MateDrinker33]

This is literally the only anecdote in this video that makes absolutely no sense without context, lmfao! This made me think that he was “on the spectrum”, lol!

[@V1_The_Machine]

@@MateDrinker33…why is on the spectrum in quotes? Genuinely not trying to be mean, I would like to know because to me it sounds like you’re being somewhat sarcastic by putting that in quotes. If anything, the fact that you acknowledge that Autism is a spectrum shows you are much more knowledgeable about the condition than most people, which further confuses me about the saying being in quotes. I’m on the spectrum myself, and I’m genuinely just curious why you put that in quotes.

[@llamawalrushybrid]

@@V1_The_Machine Some people put slang in quotes. Or also to show that the 3 separate words of: on the spectrum, are referring to one singular thing as well. But my guess is they put the quotes because it's somewhat slang, as in not the official term of diagnosis. Hope this helps!

[@Eantrin]

“Coffee coffee coffee! Coffee! Not as strong as methamphetamine but you get to keep your teeth.” -Freeman’s Mind

[@loicmenard9006]

Can't get your teeth yellow if you don't have them!

[@WackoMcGoose]

Freeman clearly prefers oxy... and not oxygen. You can't get high off oxygen.

[@asdfgidji879]

you can keep your teeth with meth actually, its a pretty complex set of circumstances. youve got malnurishment which is bad for yout teeth a dry mouth also bad and the smoke itself is bad, if you dont smoke then youve just gotta eat regulary burush and stay well hydrated which sounds easy but isnt, if you do those tho youll have teeth, if you smoke brush after each time

[@holstorrsceadus1990]

​@@WackoMcGooseyou can get high on oxygen. It's why they give it to you in the Ambo. You can also get Hyperoxia.

[@Sego763]

Goated series lol

[@lemonadogirl4082]

16:42 Without knowledge of what exactly the job in this story is, I have to point out that it is an unfortunate fact that job postings listing a weight-lifting requirement is a crapshoot as to whether or not the job actually requires it in a number of cases. The job the poster is telling us about might actually need it, but it is an unfortunate reality that a LOT of online job postings will use that type of language purely as a way to screen out disabled applicants without leaving proof of an explicit EEO/ADA/etc violation. If it's something like a warehouse/stocking job, its more likely to be legit, sure. But for office jobs? Lines like that get a MAJOR side-eye.

[@Albanwinter]

I fell asleep at work once during my lunch break. HR guy was walking through the lunch room just as it was time for me to clock back in. Though I was so out of it that I couldn't move I could actually hear what was going on around me. Someone was about to shake me awake to clock back in but the HR guy said "Nah, let her sleep." What the heck?! Weirdly I didn't get fired either. After I had heard him I struggled myself awake not too long after so I didn't get in trouble. Maybe about fifteen, twenty minutes. If I recall correctly he actually had told the manager of the department where I worked that I was sleeping and that he was allowing it. Something like that. It was a slow day at the store and our department was really slow to begin with on any given day. My whole thing was I was always completely dependable at the places where I worked. So they generally gave me leeway for certain things.

[@redjoker365]

I was really lucky at my last call center job. I was the only person on-site for the on-call help desk on Saturdays during the day shift, and we had a cot. We never got calls, so once the afternoon hit if I was tired I rolled out the cot we had in the office and took naps in 30 minute increments, checked for voice mails or new tickets, and then went back for another 30 until I felt refreshed. 12 hour shift from 8AM to 8PM for the back half of the week, alternating Wednesdays. Pretty sweet gig for tier 1 help desk

[@Doors067]

Rare case of an hr person doing good. That's nice to hear Those are the company's worth your loyalty and getting harder to find

[@asdfgidji879]

if youre worth the salt you can get away with a ton, thats something bad employees never get, "well miss velma goes out to smoke once an hour" but like miss velma does double the work you do without a smoke break no shit she can go smoke whenever tf she wants why shouldnt she? you can only break rules if youre useful enough to break them otherwise im gonna work you like a dog until i don thave to worry about it, i was chillin the other day eating an ice cream and useless points it out that hes being hounded to work harder and im eating ice cream on the clock but like every piece of work i could do has been done. theres nothing left fs i can chill out you havent even started yet and its almost time to close youve done your chillin already

[@arentr9024]

I hear that in foreign countries you can get fired if you fall asleep while working as a call centre agent.

[@Albanwinter]

@@arentr9024 I worked at a discount airline ticket agency for a while. We did phone sales where people called in for the tickets. One of the men there had a new baby in the house. He fell asleep twice at his desk. One time he had been leaned backwards, his chair against the wall. Suddenly *whoomph*. He fell so dead asleep that he went right over. After that one he did get a warning though. I mean the company felt for him but they told him he was going to have to stay alert.

[@Iamyourpadisah]

I didn't personally experience this, but I worked as an HR Assistant and noticed that a prior employee was listed as only having worked for one day. I asked my boss about it, and she said that he had passed the interview, been hired, and told to bring some proof of ID for the intake process. He arrives for his first day and reports to her without them, so she takes further pity on him (The usual process was to bring ID before being hired and she was already doing him a favor by letting him bring it on his first day) and urges him to rush home and get them. He leaves and is never seen again-being formally fired at the end of the day when it was clear he wasn't coming back. Since he reported to her before clocking in for his first day, his total time worked was 0 minutes.

[@StilltheAp0llyon]

19:03 It's illegal to withhold a worker's pay for breaking equipment. If they did it maliciously you can fire them and sue them, but you can't refuse to pay them. You hired someone with no training and let them work with no supervision, the resulting damages are the fault of management, not the employee.

[@dvwelch1]

You can make an emoyee pay for broken equipment IF you had them sign an agreement stating they accept responsibility prior to handing over control.

[@BrettKolb-o9n]

Something about the line “Violating my unwritten 11th rule, don’t try to murder people” is just such a funny line, 10/10 writing on that one

[@michaeledmunds7056]

Damn, I always forget that one. They should really write these down

[@blakethegreatone2058]

I watched a girl get fired because she fell asleep during orientation. She kept complaining she was sooooooo tired, but the boss didnt care. Lol

[@star20alpha]

I have a story! Worked 3rd shift at a grocery store. Was training a new hire for cashier duties when she asked how many people were there. I told her(truthfully)that usually it'll be just the cashier up front, and one or two managers and a stock person putting product up, but they were easily reachable if/when you needed something. She got this deer in headlights look on her face, and declared that she was "assured" by HR in her interview that there would ALWAYS be two cashiers, at least 4 other people stocking, and a freaking security person there for every shift. I just looked at her, and said that's not what happens. When I saw HR person in the morning, she also had no clue why that person claimed that, and she never showed up for another shift again.

[@thewanderingmistnull2451]

That sounds like really bad anxiety that needs to be medicated.

[@Doors067]

​@@thewanderingmistnull2451the way people act now a days I can see her point of view.

[@silentxiii9496]

Guy didn't make it out of orientation, He wouldn't shut up and refused to cooperate on a task they had set up and told us about before hand so they walked him out right there.

[@indigowulf]

I watched a few of your videos and when you said "was that shock... anaphylactic" I hit the like button and realized I had not hit the sub yet. Fixed that! I got a story as well. Was running a register at a pharma/convenience store. My and my co-worker made eye contact and silently said "wow, is that person from corporate?" as this girl walked by. Dressed to the 9's hair done up, makeup looked amazing. Turns out, she got a professional makeup/hair person and the interviewing outfit from one of those state funded programs to help people on welfare find jobs. She was hired on the spot because of her professional presentation. 2 days later, she was fired for smoking some sort of crystal in a tinfoil pipe in the employee bathroom. Perfect example of "don't judge a book by the cover."

[@jmonster555games]

Your comment made me realize, i just subbed

[@TheAustralianIdiot]

That joke made my bones vibrate- I really got to stop saying this stuff, screw what I was saying. WHY ME! WHY SAY THIS WEIRD STUFF!

[@hayleyhhhpyumcgregorhh3469]

@@jmonster555gamesi

[@KetsubanZero]

I guess crashing a forklift on a container full of fish and brine is definitely a way to keep you awake

[@drawesomejulia]

I was recently hired for my first job, worked 3 hours, and was fired! I didn’t do anything wrong, and I think I actually did really well and made sure to help out my coworkers. I was let go because a previous employee quit and decided to come back, taking the position back from me.

[@beksc9209]

Lousy of the workplace, then. Probably a good thing you are not working there anymore---sounds like it wasn't a great place to work.

[@hope1447]

Story 4 I feel like if someone like that was hired at a restaurant they and the restaurant would be sued for murder or attempted murder if the person is okay in the end especially if cc cameras are involved

[@valenciageode25]

The “You’ll see” makes me think she was definitely planning to poison the person with the allergy to prove it was fake.

[@hope1447]

@@valenciageode25 people like that make me sick and shouldn't exist

[@kirra6384]

For the phlebotomist job- the army training for lab techs is basically two years of college in six months. We had a few people actually have to leave the room, I think one person puked. Meanwhile, half of the women I went to basic with were fighting over who got to be my partner because my veins are seriously amazing. I was even the practice dummy for blood donation, because at the time I didn't weigh enough to actually donate, but they could simulate it and end the blood collection after like, ten seconds. I actually have a scar because it happened several times, even got a coin for it. I've also drawn my own blood (butterfly needle and tape makes it so easy) but as a kid, I was terrified of getting shots, didn't care about my blood being drawn though.

[@horseluver4ever623]

Stuck sick in bed today. Thanks for the content, this is my favorite category of stories!

[@MsWolf8129]

I hope you get better soon!

[@mbcommandnerd]

What a coincidence; me too!

[@horseluver4ever623]

@@NijutheWolf wtf

[@skyepilot4074]

Hope you feel better soon!!

[@Lilli_Loves_Bondi]

Aw some, I’ve been out of school the entire week, tomorrow is the last day before spring break, so I’m hoping to go tomorrow

[@ElderEmo06]

I've been severely allergic to milk my whole 29 years of life. Classmates always thought i was lying for special attention. Little did they know the special attention was getting to eat some "especially" stale cookies my mom gave to the teacher, whenever the kids had a special treat for birthdays.. kids are assholes. Thanks for making us feel included with the story!

[@Zapmannn]

I think the world is turning a lil to soft, howd you get bullied for lactose intolerance 💀💀💀

[@liamevans7661]

⁠@@Zapmannnbro stay in school, lactose intolerance and milk allergy are entirely different. One is gastric issues caused by a problem digesting the milk sugar, lactose, as the body doesn’t produce the enzyme needed to break it down. The allergy is where the immune system attacks the milk proteins, mistaking them for germs, and damaging the body in the process through swelling, hives, itching, throat closing up, or even anaphylaxis. Next time you go judge someone, maybe you’ll remember you probably don’t know as much as you think you do.

[@inquisitivefeline]

​@@ZapmannnDude. Milk allergy is like peanut allergy. You'll need an epipen and an ambulance.

[@patrickbuick5459]

I got fired *before* my first day. But I *did* get to go to the Xmas party. I was hired to start on Monday, but the boss was told to let everyone go on Monday as they were closing the office. I was asked to go to the Xmas party so nobody got suspicious. Strangest and most uncomfortable thing ever.

[@breeze7464]

​@esdigital5259 tomato, to-mato, dunce

[@iampfaff]

@esdigital5259Xmas

[@VoidedMage]

@@breeze7464 fun fact Xmas in the language it is from actual just means Christmas! Now go to forums and cry like the little child you are!

[@achimsinn6189]

Not the manager, but another new worker who started at the same company. The woman was claiming to have studied mathematics and IT. She told them in the interview that she'd be speaking frensh, italien, english, romanian and spanish and german (obviously as I live in germany). And she also said that she was having a lot of experience in production planning and a job in supply chain would be no problem for her. I was interviewing at the same time as her and thought "OK, that is kind of cocky to say" and "omg, I hopw I don't look stupid by not showing that kind of selfesteem myself" When we started working, it took 30 minutes, before the head of production wanted to talk to me. He asked if I minded to do the production planning job instead ot the sales backoffice job I was applying for - the woman turned out to not being able to open Excel, was not understanding a introduction by our frensh head of european production and instead just looked at him dumbfounded before she basically ran out of the building crying. The next day she called in sick due to a nervous breakdown because all of that work was too much for her. They then tried to reach out to her, but she didn't react to anything, so they ended up firing her in order to do so while she was still on probation time. And in case somebody wonders, the job in production planning was not particularly hard. I did that job for 3 years with little to no prior experience and did well enogh just with some basic frensh and decent to good english and IT user skills.

[@jamiethal1319]

She can’t speak or understand French and Italian, and you can’t spell French and Italian. Great story though.

[@LuckyyBrawl]

Stealing from a nonprofit or charity organization has to be one of the most evil petty crimes. I would understand stealing from a giant supermarket if you need food that badly, but come on man…

[@harryboyes2812]

Not fired, the guy quit. At the time I was working as a casual for a council and a new guy fronted up one morning. I told him what we'd be doing and he said he'd just go park his car. We never saw him again. Time on site: less than 15 minutes. Sure we'd had fellas leave after a few days before, but not even a quarter of an hour? Sheesh.

[@theragingrodent__]

I once lasted a day at a job! I got hired at a fast food chain restaurant at 17. The manager texted me to tell me my first day. I finished work and asked what my second day was. They told me they hadn't finished the schedule yet but theyd send it out on Sunday. Sunday comes and nobody tells me. I texted the manager like 3 times over the next few days to no response. Eventually he texts me back and says "you can't just show up to work when you feel like it so i took you off the schedule". Classic fast food antics. To this day I'm not sure what happened, but I'm pretty sure someone just forgot to message me and threw me under the bus.

[@slc1161]

The ad for beer came up right in the middle of the alcoholic manager story. Too funny!

[@ButteredToast32]

I used to be a busser at iHop. We mostly clear and clean the tables, and clean dishes in the back. We had a new hire, a middle-aged woman, being taught how to clean the dishes. She thought she would only be clearing/cleaning the tables. After being there for a whole 15 minutes, she says she forgot her lunch in her car, and we never saw her again.

[@Psilo-gn1sx]

I used to work at the dump. They hired a guy who meandered around for a few hours, and after someone told him to go clean up the electronics drop off, he's like "oh I can't, I have a bad back". Like bro, that's literally your only responsibility

[@McClane4Ever.]

The temp angency bait and switch is hilarious.

[@lisashafer9]

Didn't fire her but i worked in a bakery/deli in a grocery store. We had a new girl 20 years old i think start. We asked her to make sandwiches for the deli case. We already had all the stuff for the sandwiches ready on a table for her. She said she couldn't make sandwiches because she had never made or eaten one in her life. I said bulls*** to her. Her excuse was that she was a army brat(her words). My grandpa was military and my dad and his siblings could make sandwiches as soon as they could grab the bread. She didn't last 1 hour.

[@slc1161]

Anaphylaxis is nothing to joke about. I worked at an outpatient surgical center. One of our anesthesiologists has a severe seafood allergy. We ordered Chinese one day and explained about the allergy and be super careful with his meal. 4 bites in, he starts wheezing and grabbing his throat. Turns out some dufus had a couple pieces of shrimp accidentally mixed in despite our warning. Fortunately we keep a fully stocked emergency cart and the nurses were able to get IV lines in and rapidly pushed some epinephrine and diphenhydramine while waiting for the ambulance. He did okay because he happened to be right where he could get help. Called the restaurant back after and chewed them out and reported them to the state. I think they didn’t believe us when we told them to be careful. They were shocked when we told them they almost killed a doctor. And our cases were delayed because we had to get a replacement anesthesiologist since the CRNAs aren’t allowed to function without the anesthesiologist in the building.

[@filanfyretracker]

supermarkets must be hell for allergies, there is no sterilization of the work space between customers. Its simply impossible to say wipe belts between every customer because they come back to back. And then there is the self checkouts...

[@FizzieWebb]

Story 7. I was not expecting the Phlebotomist reveal. I was expecting like.. janitorial work or something where you'd go in like "I though I'd just be hauling trash and sweeping and stuff, not needing to walk into a bathroom and scrub mostly liquified shit off the walls because someone had a mental breakdown on the crapper."

[@nyx_the_raven7830]

Not the one who did the firing, in fact, this story is actually about how I got hired! Applied for a job at the front desk of the local art museum, got called the next day, had my interview a day or two later. Manager seemed to like me, but I unfortunately got a call a couple days later saying I was passed over. Sad, but expected. Literally *the next day* I got a call saying "Hey, we might need you to cover a couple days here and there, still interested?" Long story short, the new hire was wanting essentially the *entire* month off immediately after being hired, and I was working just under full time (part-time position) in under a week. Still have the job, and it's *amazing*. Edit: Evidently, the reason they were hired instead of me in the first place was because they were bilingual (english/spanish). I've never had someone come in who could only speak Spanish. In fact, the closest I've gotten was an older couple (with an English-speaking friend) who could only speak French. Which was the only language that I was and still am in the process of learning.

[@ricksaburai]

5:30 quite the understatement. If this newhire were a man, he would get immediately rehired as a full time prisoner in the local jail. It's way more than disruptive, this is literally a collection of sexual assault stories

[@thecrispymaster]

I'm not sure about that. We had a male social worker who would get very "over-familiar" with vulnerable people but rather than press charges, they'd just keep shuffling him around. I think people confuse the fact that men are more likely to go to prison for behaving in this way COMPARED TO WOMEN with the idea that they're likely to go to prison at all. Frankly, it's just setting the bar so low it's practically touching the ground, and they still don't make it that far over it. The justice system is just really poor about handling this shit in general, is what I'm saying. And whenever people make these comparisons I think they're missing the bigger picture/problem.

[@ricksaburai]

@@thecrispymaster I completely get what you mean and I'm also pissed off at the idea of guys like the one you described getting at most a slap on the wrist. The justice system being "poor" is quite the understatement. My point, though, is that there's an obvious double standard made worse by the fact that the "standard" is so low. Even when men who do this get away with it, we think "this is some nasty and unfair impunity"; when women do it, nobody bats an eye at it. If the justice system actually started chugging harassers behind bars, I'd bet men would be over-represented in both quantity and severity. Men are just supposed to take it, I guess

[@jayperie2337]

Fired a newly graduated trainee chef on day 1 when he dumped chicken blood into a bowl of 30 beaten eggs by being careless. He also didn't know how to fry an egg, nevermind work in a fine dining establishment.

[@mondexponent2126]

In a restaurant we had a new cook. After he saw that his coworker in the kitchen was female he said : I don’t take orders from women. He was instantly fired on the spot

[@lukejohnston5566]

Most belt sanders are completely capable of sanding steel, but you'll want to change your belts out more often, and probably for a finer grit if you've got something super coarse on to hog out wood. One of the few tools that will work on wood and steel. Sparks are normal and harmless. The idea that a seasoned set designer would not know this, and would insist the belt sander needs replacing, is baffling to me. If anything the kid wore out a single sanding belt, $10 at most.

[@wiseausrs]

I was just about to say this. I work as a fabricator in a Special FX workshop. Most of the work we do is with steel. As long as the grit is good you can sand almost anything.

[@thewanderingmistnull2451]

I think the main problem with the kid was the attempted murder.

[@sistermadrigalmorning233]

He didn't say he was replacing the whole sander, I was assuming he was replacing the belts out of the paycheck and any other parts he stressed with misuse. But yeah, the attempted murder was way worse.

[@player400_official]

Not a manager, but happened at my workplace. I work at a tour company, where we drive people around the city centre in electric carts (think golf cart, but for 8 people) between different attractions. We are generally allowed to drive on public roads. But within reason - max speed of those things is like 25-30kph. Ofc we just don’t have freeways on the tour route, because it’d be absurdly dangerous and pointless (nothing interesting to see on a freeway). On his first day, the new guy went on a few tours as a passenger. Then he said he’d like to take one of the cars and drive through the tour route without customers (for practice). He called our manager hours later to say that his car battery died. Turned out his battery died… on a highway. He drove to the far end of the city, through a high speed road tunnel under a river and onto a highway. He drove multiple times the distance our normal tour takes. All in a glorified gold cart with 25kph max speed - while on the highway people were probably whizzing past him doing 150. Vehicle had to be towed. That was his first and last day on the job.

[@AuntTamenilla]

Had a guy that called in from jail on his second day of work. He said that he wouldn't be able to make it for a couple of weeks since he was locked up for beating up his girl (which he fully admitted to doing) but if we wouldn't mind holding onto his job for him til he made bail since it wasn't his fault that he couldn't come in. The boss disagreed and told him that he had made a choice that had affected his ability to come in and that we would no longer be needing his services.

[@tomhaskett5161]

Story #3 - she was trying it on, hoping you would do her work

[@MeepChangeling]

19:00 Knifemaking and bladesmithing in general also uses belt sanders for shaping and profiling the blades both before and after hardening them. Though you do have to make sure it's rated for steel... Just saying that's an easy mistake to make.

[@NeverBeenOnMaury]

When I was a cook they hired a new guy. He was to start the next day. Next day he calls the manager and says he will he about 2 hours late. Manager just said, no thanks. You're fired. I asked manager why, he said if he couldn't be on time on his first day, he has larger problems.

[@angstydoodles1101]

I think that almost depends on the reason you're late. Like, if your car broke down? Fine. If your mom died? Fine. If you slept in? Not fine. If there was unanticipated traffic on the interstate? Not really fine either.

[@jamiethal1319]

You shouldn’t be punished for unforeseen traffic reasons. Not your fault. Also if your mother dies, you call and say that instead of saying you’ll be 2 hours late. I wouldn’t be coming in at all for a very long time.

[@patrickbuick5459]

My Jeep power steering pump exploded on the way to my first day of a new job. I mean pulley and shaft on top of the engine exploded. I inspected the carnage, realized it would survive the drive without the serpentine belt and made it to work on time. At lunch, I did measurements and calculations and bought a shorter belt to bypass that pulley so that it had water pump, alternator, etc all turning the right way until I could get a replacement pump. I lasted there 4 years before my throat gave out manning phones doing technical support.

[@thewanderingmistnull2451]

Good for you, but not everyone is secretly a mechanic.

[@83gemm]

My brother got his first job in college. His professor ran some kind of side business that had something to do with computers. The professor’s wife was the manager of the department where my brother worked. He made some error on his first day and the wife was chewing him out. She said, “A kindergartener could have followed my instructions.” My brother replied, “You should have hired one. You could have paid him in lollipops.” He was BAFFLED that she fired him. His next job was in programming after he graduated and he now makes six figures.

[@meegansandberg1308]

My maintenance manager was training a new hire. Maintenance includes a lot of custodian work at my job. He was showing the new guy how to clean the outside of the drive-thru windows. After he cleaned the first window, he asked the newbie to clean the next one. The newbie told him he wasn't going to do it and if my manager had a problem with it, he would tell a bigger boss that the manager touched him inappropriately. Got fired on the spot.

[@SomeOrdinaryJanitor]

i have a story like this, there was a short period of time i worked at a warehouse and so another new hire and I were waiting for management to train us, and right before we got trained, the lady in management told us earbuds and headphones are prohibited for safety reasons (forklifts). immediately the other person i was with apologized for wasting the company's time and explained that she needs music to work and wouldn't function without her earbuds... still get a kick outta thinkin' about it.

[@cpcoasternut]

Years ago I worked with 3 people at an amusement park. We worked in the arcade/games department and were setting up the redemption prize center in the arcade. One of guys was bragging saying “watch I bet you by the end of the season I will be a team leader”. Few days later he was fired for trying to steal a MP3 player. This was before the park was ready to open for the season

[@philbateman1989]

We had a new security guard at the university I work at get fired within 2 days. We had some of our engineering students displaying their F1 car modifications for a public presentation. These were very real and very expensive F1 cars, with very visible barriers and signs warning people to not touch the cars. The security guard photographed himself sitting in one of the cars after the show when everyone had left. He might have gotten away with a stern telling off had he not published the photo where the owner of the car who was loaning it to us could see it, and also putting a hefty scratch on the bodywork with his big keychain. We're insured out the ass as we frequently exhibit expensive items that our students are working on or have been loaned to us for public exhibits, so the damage was taken care of, but yeah, way to show that you can't be trusted. Kind of a key quality for a security guard :S

[@OtakuSapien]

Another daycare story. My job hires a lot of college girls who don't always have experience with younger children. One new girl was placed in Toddlers (1.5- 2 y/o class) on her first day. It was a 3 hour trial shift to see how she was with the kids. She was there maybe 1 hour when she scolded the kids for not cleaning up from coloring fast enough and THREW OUT THEIR DRAWINGS. Don't know if she did it to punish them or thought it didn't matter bc they were "just scribbling." My boss let her know it wasn't going to work out after her 3 hours were up

[@DanThe2nd]

Years ago, one of my employees had a granddaughter that was in a pretty rough place in life, but would come around to help her grandmother at work frequently. As she was familiar with the kind of work we did and needed work, I offered her a job. She declined several times, until eventually she wound up pregnant and could no longer put off actual employment. She proceeded to call the regional director during her first week falsely accused several of her coworkers as well as me, her boss, of not doing any work. I found out about this the next day, and called the director to make sure I could fire her for this, but I didn't have to as she never showed up for work again. Turns out she had rolled her truck over, driving in to work drunk. Turns out many people are in a bad place in life for self inflicted reasons.

[@joranmoore5663]

When working at KFC, a new person showed up on his first day completely intoxicated and tried selling everyone opened bottles of alcohol. Including the store manager. I don't think he lasted more than 10 minutes.

[@rebajoe]

1:50 Story 3 reminds me of Mrs Doubtfire where the lady they're interviewing is just listing all the things she won't do as a housekeeper(basically she intended on doing nothing) 24:10 Last Story: i was worried it was gonna turn out the guy had narcolepsy.

[@Reggie2000]

15 minutes! I worked at a pizza shop and went for cigarettes and came back and my crazy @zz GM hired two 12 year olds! He said, don't worry, I put them in the system as being sixteen years old. I paid them each 20 bucks cash from the till, and said NEVER SPEAK ABOUT THIS EVER! 😮😂

[@troypowers750]

I used to be a frycook at Five Guys. There was a guy my manager hired and I was asked to supervise him on his first night. I admit that I have an issue with micromanaging the guy, but I did catch a few mistakes here and there. Tbh, he did okay. While I was doing the shakes and checking on him every now and then, the next thing that happens is that he takes a lunch break and disappears. The next day, my manager tells me that he bailed because of me. I was like, "Oh shit." The manager and I were on good terms and knew who I was and how I worked, so he took my side. I made sure to let the new guys know that I'm not above them and gave them permission to remind me if I was overbearing.

[@raymiller1753]

I fired a guy before he ever started his first shift. I hired him for a cashier position when I worked at a small grocery store. I interviewed him on a Friday and told him he could start the following Monday. He came in on Saturday and I caught him stealing beer. When I confronted him, he tried to fight me. I told him he was fired and banned from the store for life. Never saw him again.

[@ursadabear2810]

Justice for adult store ninja!

[@gwoody4003]

First 10 minutes. I was kitchen manager at a brewery, and the new guy says to me right after the interview and being hired... he can't work Saturdays and Sundays cus he likes to party and will have to call off if I schedule him cus he will still be drunk or too hung over. And then another time, I had a guy for about 5 hours who didn't know the difference between a red and a yellow onion, and the owner caught him smoking a blunt by the dumpster twice in the 5 hours he was there. We don't even care about pot, its Michigan and there are plenty of cooks who can smoke and still rock their job. But the only 2 times the owner ever saw this guy, he was behind the dumpster getting stoned.... and he didn't know the red onions are the red onions. 😂

[@FoggyBadger]

Fasted I've ever seen was less than a day. I wasn't a manager, though. It was at a restaurant and this new girl was hired to be a waitress. She shadowed one of the older waitresses in the morning, and in the afternoon after the lunch rush calmed down she was to take her own tables. HER VERY FIRST TABLE, she cussed out the customer and got into a fight with them. I mean, I think we've all wanted to do that, but she actually did it! The manager ran over, fired her, and offered the customer the meal for free.

[@roguenine9LU]

I was a shift manager at a retail store a few years ago. We had a cashier there for her first shift after being hired. I had let her know that I would be able to let her take her lunch break as soon as I finished what I was working on towards the back and left her alone for a bit. About 15-20 minutes later a customer came to find me and asked to check out and I couldn't find her anywhere in the store. Once I got the line of customers finished I checked the camera, she had just walked out with no explanation, didn't steal anything, just left. I don't think we even had to fire her, pretty sure we couldn't get in touch with her. I didn't have anything to do with hiring an foring though.

[@tanuki2898]

I wasn't the manager, but i was the cashier on shift when a new hire was fired before even clocking in. She came from a family whose surname was synonymous with abuse in our small town. Spousal abuse, child abuse, substance abuse, probably animal abuse. She was dropped off by her husband, while wearing company merch, and the two were engaged in a screaming match i could hear from inside. My boss was out there at the time and walked over to her. Meanwhile, customers were coming and going seeing the whole fiasco. My boss has to bring her into the office tell her in no uncertain terms that this was unprofessional behavior and it couldn't be permitted on company property. Thats the first time I had met one of that family in person. I feared for their young kids.

[@nicholasfarrell5981]

Story 24, they legit hired Ninja Rick.

[@angelpandadaylane4924]

Oh really, gonna wait to hear that one 7:16pm

[@nicholasfarrell5981]

@@angelpandadaylane4924 he was a character in a webcomic I used to read, weeb who always carried a katana.

[@brandonchristen2472]

There was this host at a restaurant I worked at. She is an artist and would frequently paint at the bar after her shifts, left me a quarter one time after I gave her a glass of water for her brushes which….why? Just keep the quarter. As a host she was absolutely terrible. She would often take bathroom breaks during busy weekends for 15+ minutes. On top of that she was super spacey and everyone was suspicious she was using drugs in the bathroom. She lasted longer than she should’ve, but the turning point was when she called out on a fully booked Saturday because of a funeral, which is reasonable enough…. What was NOT reasonable was her coming into the restaurant the same night to paint at the bar after calling out. Funeral or not you don’t go back to your work to hang out after you just called out. She was let go the next day.

[@LunaT-u8v]

I'm wasn't in management at the time, but when I was working in a department store, I saw someone get fired within the first hour of the their shift. She had brought a fairly large, definitely solid metal knife into the building with her. It was quickly discovered, and she explained she only brought it because she planned to use it while on break. I don't remember every detail, but in summary: She did not agree that this knife was a dangerous weapon and did not see it as a violation of store policy (it was clearly both). It only took this encounter a few minutes before she was fired, escorted out by security, and banned from ever returning to the store. I also had a co-worker steal a customer's wallet, once, though that one took a couple of weeks. I was working in shoes that day, and was hearing every word of the two officers questioning him in my back room while standing at my register. That was really awkward, especially when I had to walk right past all three of them if I needed to get a pair of shoes from back there.

[@felicitybywater8012]

Not a manager but watched mine fire someone right in tje middle of his interview. He, the interviewee, was insane.

[@haleylampley1056]

Wait now I want details, what happened

[@felicitybywater8012]

The interviewee just started aggressively telling the boss he was doing things wrong. Our mouths dropped open and he boss was briefly stunned into silence then recovered and very snippily hussled the interviewee nutter out of the workshop, slammed the door on his heels, locked it then came back and gave us a wild-eyed look and asked us if that really just happened. Fortunately, the interviewee nutter was never seen again. It was utterly weird.

[@narthex1681]

I'm glad the dog one didn't go the way I was expecting it to go

[@That1Guy_707]

Phlebotomist here: Just wanting to say that if you want to get into phlebotomy, great! You should consider taking a certification course! It’s not a very hard job to do but working any job in healthcare is gonna be different than anywhere else. Even if you aren’t squeamish about blood, you might have a hard time with needles, or have a hard time causing pain to another person. Taking a certification only takes a couple months and is a good way of knowing if it’s the right position for you 👍

[@baronvg]

I’ve worked retail and fast food so there have been plenty of very short stints for new hires, none of which I even remember. But I worked an office job where we hired a new salesman. After a little over a week, I find out that he was fired. Turns out he asked the boss for an advance on his (first) paycheck and when he got it, he never came back to work 😂

[@tiff7856]

3 days, didn’t even get pass training. They had a really shitty attitude, and insisted that they already knew how to do everything cause they worked before. We worked in a sushi restaurant, they worked at a fast food place before….

[@Scripter_-be4cb]

i've been watching your channel recently and i think i'm addicted

[@ADHDpancakesurprise]

It's my favorite for binging when I'm cleaning. Great content.

[@jamesbraun9842]

They weren't my workers, but it's the shortest in my time. The person was hired to be an unloader(we were looking for someone and sounded like a good fit). His first day, the forklift operator is out. (I was running it when the truck came with my supplies. (New guy helped me unload boxes and sort the rest of the stuff for me) he shakes my hand and says "Its a pleasure to have you as my manager ". I told him I'm not his manager but they should be in soon. (LAter hear a loud swearing and yelling). Comes to my work shop asked me, "Why didn't you say my manager was a female ,I don't want to work for some woman, They can't control their emotions". Than said "Fine can you wire those pumps and find the leak in the hoses later'. (He gets confused lost look). That's what I thought. Find him later in the break room smoking a cigarette watching TV and drinking a Mountain Dew. (He was fired after 6 hours on the job.)

[@IWearShades]

"Let me go make some coffee." *SNORT* IM UP.

[@drew_on_drums]

I was manager in a truck stop kitchen for 3 months before I quit, I was there 2 years. New kid claimed he had restaraunt experience, so I told him how to change the fryers. He used a 5 gallon bucket instead of the catch we have spilling hot fryer oil everywhere and the fryer almost caught fire bc he didn't turn it off. An hour am a half after he clocked in I sent him home

[@michaeledmunds7056]

"would you feel better if you were fired?" "Yes." As someone who has worked terrible jobs, that's such a mood 😂

[@VoltyMcConroy]

I love this channel. Super great for background noise.

[@procrasti86]

18:46 wdym you can't use a belt sander to sand metal? maybe he's talking about a specific type or model. But most I used not only *CAN* but were specifically designed to grind down metal. the only thing to look out for is if you're using it to sand wood and metal, you need to sweep the floor between changing the material, as sawdust catches fire from sparks really well

[@joebarbara3310]

All of 4 minutes, he met me at home depot went in to get a couple things and he got caught stealing within 4 minutes we were in the store. Then he started begging me to bail him out, and he would come live with me till he paid me back. I gave him 20$ and told him good luck.

[@Carnibee]

This is the second time I’m watching a video of yours where a woman is overtly intimately harassing, maybe even assaulting, someone and instead of saying they are vile and deserve every horrible thing, you say “they have a problem that needs to be sorted out.” I am a woman and I say this with complete conviction: *hold men and women to the same standards*

[@llamawalrushybrid]

"Kindness towards the aggressor is cruelty towards the victim" I can mostly respect the mentality of mercy but it rubbed me very wrong that it was given in that case.

[@jayrodricks6823]

I have a friend who has been a phlebotomist for a few years at this point, and he hates blood with a passion. I've never entirely understood the fear, as it is, let alone why he still works as a phleb.

[@SJNaka101]

Lmaoooo i used to work at a plasma center and i saw a couple people come and go that couldnt handle blood. It was like, "what? Did you not understand that this whole facility is for processing blood?"

[@noahfisher6388]

During my orientation for the company I currently work for, we were doing a tour of the factory. So this guy is jittery and anxious the entire time we were waiting then he started yelling about having to pee. They told him to wait just a few more minutes. He insisted on slamming pens and clipboards that we had to sigh on/with l, then during the tour he was....."correcting" everything the tour guide said....about the company he's worked for for like 8 years at this point.... Needless to say I haven't seen him since and I've been here for just shy of a year.

[@cameronmynhier2628]

Not a firing, but I’ve had a chef show a new hire around the kitchen and introduce himself to everyone only to say “I just gotta grab something from my car real quick”, go out, and never come back🤣

[@LordBloodraven]

Five seconds. My company had a temp hired who was morbidly obese. His weight wasnt the issue. It was his hygiene and BO. He smelled like mayonnaise that had gone bad. I complained to the temp agency about his terrible hygiene and they sent us someone else. I saw the guy working at a burger place a few months later. I stopped eating there.

[@MrJoestar83]

I had a dude that was falling asleep during the introduction on the first day We are financial advisors.

[@Protagonistinfluence]

Wth is a hanging addict? 5:03 like these alternatives for "bad" words are getting so obscure it's indecipherable

[@desireeg5807]

I legit scrolled for ages - well... "ages" lol - to find any comment with an answer... Obviously assault... but that's all the context clues I have ...

[@oliverer3]

​@@desireeg5807I think the subtitles might be incorrect and it's supposed to be "banging addict" based on the audio. I.e. someone addicted to sex.

[@Michael-sb8jf]

Story about the kid getting fired is smart You can claim unemployment insurance. Idk if he would qualify in this story but alway take the pink slip.

[@Xonlic14]

Anyone else start going "No no no no" on story 12? Ahh, I've never been more relieved it was just shampoo

[@mmayfield1994]

What makes some people think it's okay to steal stuff on their first day at work? Especially when you're IN FRONT of their boss.

[@dontwatchmydoomvideos]

These guys are the reason why we get difficult interviews. And yet somehow these guys still get past them

[@LethonBaird-y7l]

I was a straw boss, we put up steel buildings my crew and I could literally step foot on the job site that had nothing but a cement pad and an assortment of i-beams angle iron purlins and sheet metal and within a week's time we could have a building 60 by 80 and 23 or 24 ft in height we can do it in a week. We hired this new guy he claimed he knew how to cut he claimed he knew how the world he claimed he knew how to read a tape measure well I tell him I need three pieces of 2 inch angle iron cutting 16 ft lengths and itake the cutting torch and blow three holes in it one in each end one in the middle. This is called base angle it is what our sheets screw to, I'm walking around looking for this guy cuz it's been 30 minutes and there's not even a piece of metal on the saw I'm looking around for him and I'll walk around the corner of a job site box straight up into this guy smoking meth his first day he had not been there for 45 minutes he had stepped off behind one of the job boxes and started smoking meth I punched him in the mouth as hard as I could shattering his pipe I then told him to get his crap and get off my job site before I call the cops. 10 minutes later my boss shows up and ask me why I punched our new employee so I told him and he told me I should have hit him again. You see years ago I had a problem I was addicted to meth and heroin I have zero tolerance for drugs or alcohol on my job site.

[@mztweety1374]

Remember that Daniel tosh joke about 10% of people not being able to work these are the 10% and now we know why

[@0five-three]

I love the "im not a manager and this isnt a record breaker but"

[@SoundExperiment123]

This inspires me to start a channel called You're Fired where I get a job and then try to get fired as fast as possible without breaking any laws

[@ultra9349]

For the guy who lied about having charges it could be because he wouldn’t get a job if he told the truth

[@chandler2581]

6:33 I work an HR job, and the number of people who fail to disclose serious criminal records after being asked in no less than three different ways is absurd. We ARE going to see it. I promise.

[@blampfno]

I worked for a while as a carpenter and site supervisor. We had a new HVAC team on site on a renovation and I found them doing lines of coke on the metal roof. Immediate dismissal. They'd been on-site for about 15 minutes.

[@jaykay3784]

Story 2: Heroin affects the hypothalamus so an overdosing addict will feel really hot. That's why he was naked.

[@IAmStillNotMatthew]

When I left my previous job(sorta fired so they won't have to give me 700€ a month instead of 630) the guy they hired before I left was set to start the next week. Worked Monday, didn't go back on Tuesday. "I'm not going back to that hellhole for 630€ a month"

[@angel-nv7jk]

Stories like this make me realize while I'm a bit clumsy at times, I'm at least not incompetent like these workers and getting fired in a short period