Managing Finances as a Married Couple

[@maxdmitry1912]

Great content Adrienne! My husband and I are financially free and currently growing a solid retirement plan. It takes a positive and consistency to learn new things, unlearn the old habits ms Important to get a mentor/coach to lead you all the way. It's great to start young too!

[@gracedaniels6172]

Hello I'm 43 working on my retirement fund too. What do you think is the best target for retirement?

[@eiraantoinette6793]

A lot of people find having a couch /financial advisor a luxury

[@maxdmitry1912]

@@gracedaniels6172 personally I think 1m is the goal to overcome inflation and having them in an inv estment p ortfolio is a perfect plan. I'm half way to my goal 😊

[@maxdmitry1912]

@@eiraantoinette6793 yeah. Fees and commissions are factors to look at in search for financial advisers. There’s financial experts out there who do not look at their fees but the impact and intrinsic value they bring along to you no matter how little you want to start. I’m glad I had one guide me start my financial journey

[@momtalksbudget5407]

I'm trying to read books about finance, budgeting and saving. Looking at having a good financial advisor. Can you recommend?

[@nikameetslife]

It’s the way y’all look at one another when the other person is talking - the love is just oozing out! 🥰💕

[@Ryan-yw8iz]

Yes, and I think they’ve been married a little while. I’m glad they still have that look

[@RealTakerslady]

OMG the way Israel looks at Adrienne, Lord send me that love 🙏🏾

[@raquelcolon5785]

Girl, Preach!!!! I am a Puerto Rican from NYC. This is valuable information. Not only did I buy my own home IN NYC with a 30% down payment, I bought a vacation home in Puerto Rico...ALL CASH!!!! It is a one bedroom apartment in Condado over looking the ocean. This Puerto Rican, right here, never though she could ever own real estate. I had a dream and i learned about assets, money, credit (Good and Bad) and I have not looked back. I am ready to embark on my next investment!!!!

[@alexmarquez9531]

Congratulations Raquel! That is an awesome accomplishment! I grew up in Brooklyn and my stepmom (who raised me) is Puerto Rican. I feel like I can relate to all this so much. I can’t wait to begin investing in real estate.

[@abigailandjavisfamily]

That’s a blessing 👏🏽

[@juanitawatson596]

Very impressive! Congrats!

[@shaedavis53]

That's awesome! Congrats! Got any investment tips?

[@raquelcolon5785]

@@shaedavis53 I don’t know what your situation is, so the best advise is START right away. When I first started, I started with 25 dollars. That’s all I had to put aside. That grew to 50, then 75 so on and so on. The point is that there is NO SUCH thing as I don’t have extra money to put aside for investments. So my advise is Start NOW!!!!!

[@itsjustjae85]

The way Israel looks at Adrienne when she talks is so beautiful 💕

[@kamahorodaphnepatra]

They inspire us on how to treat each other

[@reecee4171]

He knows exactly what hes doing! 🐍

[@sofiahaq7271]

Adrienne, I really appreciate that you talk about things that are unfortunately not discussed enough. You are paying it forward to those of us who have similar dreams as you and that speaks volumes. As a fellow Latina, it makes me so happy that hopefully more of us can become homeowners and help our families.

[@iamthedreamer6237]

Amazing 😇

[@joycedominguez1828]

Please

[@isa-qz8fg]

This account makes me feel safe and that I have a life coach/don't have to go through life alone, adore you Adrienne + her team!

[@iamthedreamer6237]

Love them 😁

[@lydiaheelu2681]

Anybody else just loves Adrienne? 🥰❤️ She’s so honest, wholesome and pure-hearted.

[@gail235]

Yes, I love Adrienne!!!💗

[@beeyurecipes4878]

Me

[@lizzylekgetho1445]

We missed Israel!❤ Please have him more!!🥰💫

[@babydev1989]

Yes!!!! My husband and I bought our first home the end of 2021, we’re so new to this! When we moved in together in 2014 we were living in the back house of his parents property. Which saved us a lot of money because although we paid rent it wasn’t ridiculous to what renting an one bedroom in LA is now a days. But I was straight up with him and told him… I want to be able to buy a house in the future for us are you onboard? Ever since that conversation he showed me he was serious about it. It took him a couple of years to fix his credit and pay off big debt and it took us a few more years to save enough for down payment/closing costs, etc. It was so cute when he came to me and told me he raised his score by this many points, or he finished paying off this account, etc. We even made it a fun competition of getting the highest credit score. When we got prequalified we were both in the 800s credit scored… Wow! We’re now happy in our first home. Oh we also kept our own bank accounts separate and discussed who pays what but also opened a joint checking for our joint expenses. That works for us.

[@gemmab8626]

WOW very inspiring!!

[@dentaldiscjockey8405]

I love the way he supports and protects you.YOUR HOME IS BLESSED

[@karol4387]

It was the intro for mee “what do you spend your 💰 on? On you.” 🥰✨

[@r.r911]

I am 37 years old who purchased my first home in 2020...my husband and I both have our names as home owner. I had really bad credit when I was in my early twenties (like 500 score) and it took me 5 years to pay back 30k in credit card debt. I am happy to say my credit score is amazing (800/805/770). It's doable people, just make sure your payments are never late. Home owner 2020!! Woot woot! 🏡 Great video!

[@friedajohnson1460]

How did you fix the credit ?

[@dii-N-sd]

@@friedajohnson1460 First step is to pay off your existing debt and make the monthly payments on-time. If you have high interest credit cards and only pay the minimum, it could take yrs to pay everything off. So, it's good to review and cut out miscellaneous expenses like daily Starbucks etc. Then apply any extra income towards your debt.

[@leonietaylor7054]

God bless you

[@jaylagibson647]

I Isreal spends more money because Adrienne was really excited about it lol. Love you guys and praying for you and just your life!

[@emmanjeri2750]

This is so informative. I pray that God blesses me with a good husband who we will invest together and we share our journey together towards investing and creating wealth together. A good man that will love me and treat me right

[@garmonyendambo5564]

AMEN!!! Same girl and you will🙏🏾❤️

[@KKayGodsdaughterwifemother]

This is one of the most honest conversations about finances and investing that I've ever witnessed from a celebrity couple. Love y'all and THANK YOU for your transparency!

[@ashleymedrano8757]

I have to say that I really wasn’t that big of a fan of Adrienne in the past but since The Real over the years I’ve seen such growth and such an evolved soul that now I truly love and believe in the advice and content she provides. Thank you for that!

[@43grantct]

I grew up in the hood and watched my mom and my Nana live check to check partially paying off things. I never had any experience with homeownership or even thought that I could. I had to learn how to save money. Adrienne is right about the financial ally. When I got my first job with benefits and 401K, I listened to some older women in the company on how to manage my 401K. Next it was stocks. They taught me how to save and always shared their tips. SLOWLY (want to express the importance of time) I got better with finances and saving. I am not 100% but getting there. PS Israel spends more. I feel like he buys expensive instruments/equipment needed for his music. Also, Ally Bank helped me get a car back in 2014 so I already know how great they are. This was a good segment.

[@TT.3123]

You’re doing amazing!

[@kykeplinger1672]

ADRIENNE… this is the exact video that I needed! It came at the most perfect time! Me and my husband have been trying to figure out our finances and how to get to a better place

[@MadisonPettway_]

I actually love seeing a married couple who don’t have a joint account

[@xoangelicaf0523]

We don’t either

[@abigailandjavisfamily]

It’s better like that

[@adriennegutierrez5991]

Better because we don’t trust.

[@TheSilkyPink]

Only for the ones who can’t trust

[@sal3579]

It's better to be that way! As long as the bills are being paid and there is food on the table, and there is money left over, then we can both spend on whatever we want. And in the future if things don't work out, we don't have to worry about spitting our accounts because it is already set up that way.

[@hannahharrison111]

I absolutely love discussions about finances, they are so crucial and should be a more open topic. Thank you for talking about this! We use Ally as our high interest savings account. We used it to save for our home down payment, and now that we have been in our house for a year, we are using our Ally savings for a kitchen renovation. I really feel for people who don't have the income to purchase a home in their area due to this brutal market driving out the average person. Until about 20 months ago it was not possible for me and my spouse. If you're in debt, I believe in your ability to climb out of that debt, and to follow your financial dreams! ❤️

[@ksayrah1987]

💙💙💙💙🤗🤗

[@arikosimariamiculet]

Czar

[@ary-shalom8356]

Give us some tips on: - How to invest in real estate. - Other types of investments such as stock market etc. - Which option do you use to get educated on investing and, Money Management. Much love to you both !! ❤️

[@ghutchin33]

Viola Davis said when she met her husband her "life got better." I can tell this is true for this couple. This looks like a true partnership.

[@ItsAkeila]

i just bought a house so i’ve been trying to gain as much knowledge as i can⭐️ thank you for all the information!! the WAYYYY israel looks at you ugh i love yall so much🌈💖blessings

[@LifewithZarya]

omg it’s akeila you were literally my childhood! 😍

[@EmorettaRobinson]

Congratulations on buying your new house! 🥳🎉

[@yvie9627]

Now this is what you call partnership 👏🏾 thank you for sharing.

[@Richard-lh3te]

I love how transparent you are! I’d love to hear your advice for blending families, I once saw a post Israel’s ex made thanking you for your friendship.

[@MS-sx5zm]

YES THIS!

[@ForeverGodsGirl03]

Which ex was that? I believe he has atleast 3 different baby mommas

[@triciaperry2234]

@@ForeverGodsGirl03 ,😂😂😂😂

[@vickicampbell2736]

I love intelligent men. Israel reminds me of my husband in looks and his ways and intelligence. Great job Mr and Mrs Houghton 👍🏽

[@LillyVeeee]

My favorite couple!!! Hey Adrienne!! Glad you and Israel are in great health. Your videos are my favorite.

[@autumncolors1673]

I remember Adrienne saying Israel wants the VIP experience wherever he goes and that after being poor as a kid, he doesn't deprive himself of experiences as an adult. I bet he's the bigger spender 😜

[@td4611]

I’ve been married over 22 years and my husband and I keep our money separate as well. We’ve never had joint accounts and we never fight over money. However, I manage the finances.

[@rozannedarling3925]

This is so good! Communication is so important in a relationship. I love that you both encourage each other and are each other’s cheerleader. I love how there is independence but at the same time you’re together as one. It’s beautiful!

[@twebazefosca6431]

Adrienne u r my forever inspiration.. the story of yr life keeps my hope alive. Continue to thrive dia.

[@loisrodenromans1097]

I love Adrienne she makes me want to be more of a woman. In my style, appearance and lifestyle. I love to learn everytime I listen to her I learn something new. I am going to buy a home soon. Thanks Adrienne for this video. May God continue to bless you and Israel 🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@Roseofnomansland201]

You two are a great example of what success and a joyful life looks like when you marry right 💜. Thanks for sharing your knowledge and experiences.

[@bellamoondiaries]

I love how Israel looks at Adrienne’s excitement on topics!!! I love herrrrrr thank you so much for the tips it’s fueling my financial success!!

[@kraftygirlz9177]

From cheetah girl to financial except. I will always love you. This was a cheetahlicious video 🦋💜

[@NikkiP-001]

I AGREE TO NO JOINT ACCOUNT AND THE SAME CONCEPT OF YOUR FINANCIAL FLOW....💯🧡

[@usenotfound168]

Thank you Andriene, u the only celebrity that a lot of people can relate to. I love that about you

[@thegoldenbowl5217]

I love how candid Adrienne is... eventhough the real ended she’s STILL out there talking... she loves expressing herself verbally and she’s gonna take whatever platforms in front of her to continue doing it.

[@charlenemosley1012]

My husband and I have one account we trust one another to be disciplined and a good steward of God’s money! This works for us! I understand in your area!

[@EmorettaRobinson]

My guess was that Israel spends the most money. And I'm so glad that you two did a video on finances. I'd really like more info on things like CD's, savings accounts, money market accounts, etc. I'm not sure if you did a video on communication in a relationship but if not then a video on that would be great. I also want to say that I love the way you and Israel look at one another. It's the sweetest thing.

[@stich1108]

I am a personal banker and I love watching your videos… this is by far one of my favorite videos!

[@shaynasorrells899]

I think it's definitely easy to say when you are both financially in good standing to not have a conversation about your finances be uncomfortable.but not everyone is in a place in there life where they can say that without being embarrassed to speak about finances to their partner or not completely comfortable.

[@august21xp]

Exactly , I don’t bother listening as a struggling single mom, this will not happen to me unless I win the lottery , I’m not trying to be negative but even if we manifest you still gotta put in the work and be realistic !

[@shaynasorrells899]

@@august21xp Exactly girl,exactly ain't nothing given.

[@michelledouglas4953]

The goal is to grow together, why would you not sit with your partner and plan your future? Any decision one of you make WILL affect the other. That's why it's important to hang around persons who motivate you, listen to you and give sound advice. We can't be shy about decisions that affect our lives/future. Come on ladies be BOLD....

[@phathuasante]

I think the most important thing is that even when the conversation is uncomfortable it should still be had.

[@lovingsamantha9443]

I love how Israel looks at Adrienne. He also seems like a mentor and great example for her. I love that in a man, love a man who can be a strength to a women and guide her. It’s cool to have a man with potential but it’s something different about a man who can really guide you and know where he’s going and what he’s doing in life.

[@OfficialEbonyRoots]

This seems like the joy of being a wife to a man who has not just been married before, but is also older. On the other hand I and my husband are in our first marriage and are going through all these road bumps after marriage. You both work well together.

[@octavia8965]

Thank you, Adrienne for being transparent and helping out your friends. We 🤍 you!

[@tkong542]

LOVE these practical chats. Keep ‘em coming, Adrienne!

[@alicias-a-list]

I love to see you all like this. I wish I'd seen this in my 20s. Right now I'm broke and facing bankruptcy. Think you all could do a video on when you're in financial trouble? Love yas!

[@lisagreene8855]

Thank you for being so transparent, owning up to your mistakes and growing beyond your lack of knowledge.

[@tansok4537]

She so proud of what she has learn. I feel like she’s growing up and learning this important information as an adult. I have a feeling she didn’t know non of this prior to meeting Israel . What a difference it makes to have a mature partner.

[@kwr2879]

Buying a house is such a great investment because when you have equity in that home you can refinance it and cash out some of the equity for home renovations and paying off debt...that was a lifeline for us.

[@coachmelonie1574]

I think its always good to get out of the habit of using vocabulary like I, my, mine. In a marriage, you are a partnership and even though its ok to have you own account, it's our money, its we, its us! Very important to have that conversation. I had a 500 something score when I met my husband, now its 820. He taught me a lot about finances and money management. What a blessing!

[@misaelmartinez299]

Amen! That's powerful Praise God

[@malindastone2871]

You two are absolutely precious! I love how you love each other!

[@judyheagy3550]

You two need to start your own finance podcast. You two are so adorable!. 🥰🤗

[@Princess_with_an_opinion]

Adrienne , I love how authentic and relatable you are . It’s so apparent how much you love each other . A financial ally I love that term. I’m a teacher and I work part-time for a mortgage company . This is solid advice . Lenders require appraisals , but as a buyer you need to insist on an inspection . The appraisal protects the lender the inspection protects you . Your mom had the best advice for the situation that she was in.

[@tweetyqt05]

Hearing u both have separate accounts makes me feel so good as I am heading towards marriage with my man I see having only a joint account for major bills but being transparent

[@tannyland6412]

Jesus loves you he died on the cross for your sins. Believe in him and you will be saved and go to heaven!

[@vernawilliams3979]

Lovely couple may god continue to bless you both.

[@TenishaDav]

We’d love to see a day in the life with Israel. He’s too cool. Thanks for sharing the knowledge.

[@queenie5924]

Literally needed a vid like this !! Thank you!!

[@valeriesanders6806]

Adrienne, girl! I just love how you in Israel are so into one another. ❤️

[@AliciaRodriguez_]

I wish you two could make a 2h long video every week. I listen to you while working and it feels like listening to my friends telling me about their lives 🥰

[@aliro8016]

I love how open and honest you guys were. I also loved how Is loved on you by squeezing your arm while you were explaining things 😍☺️. I really appreciate this so very much and will always support.

[@VEE2]

I’m listening to what you’re saying, but there’s a spirit of love that looms over you and you don’t get to see that often. I believe that this union is sealed, meaning till death do y’all part. Blessing, great advice by the way.

[@nellygabby3]

Love this video so much! Thank you A for always giving us the best advice! I am 25 y/o and unfortunately living in my car BUT it’s ok, i am working my butt off trying so hard to SAVE, little by little that hopefully even just an Apartment would be amazing…. God is great! God is good! With him I am going to be just fine! Xoxo!

[@ofeliahernandez1361]

I love this! I am a REALTOR in San Antonio TX and I am always surprised at people telling me "you think I can own a home" and I'm always saying "YES!" we just need to know where you stand financially and put you on a plan to get your loan approval. They quickly become my best clients. I love this.

[@LindaTinahTV]

This was a very insightful video. Been married almost 10 years and looking back, we didn't talk about finances enough in the initial stages of our relationship which is something I advise against. Thing don't automatically work themselves out. You need to constantly put things on the table.

[@garyreed7353]

We ladies normally handle everything but it is a blessing when your husband helps as well team work is very good so happy for her may you two keep getting all your blessings and more be blessed

[@TheNaisenya]

Very informative discussion, thank you. I think Israel spends more money because in another video, Adrienne talked about all the shopping apps on his phone. And Adrienne is a self-confessed frugal Fannie 😊

[@Dinoleo26]

My husband is AMAZING at saving money but he had no credit. My credit has always been great & im VERY proud of it since I did it completely on my own, so my hubby & I sat down & I told him he wouldn’t apply for anything, I added him to my credit cards & then after a few months we decided he would at that point apply for a store/commercial card and we quickly built his up enough for us to buy our first home in ‘18, we were 25 & 28 y/o. Last year we bought our 2nd home. It requires discipline from both parties to build each other up, if you’re helping someone & that person isn’t responsible or doing anything on his/her part then that’s not the right person to help.

[@Enoughinternet556]

This is so off topic 😂 but I just hope one day (because right now as a 23 year old single mom it feels impossible lol) I find a man that looks at me and is as touchy with me as Israel is with you 😌 GOALS on so many levels 👏🏾❤️

[@marieeleonaregeffrard81]

Israel definitely is the big spender.He has expensive taste,and I LOVE IT.Blessings beautiful couple.

[@cher-ker]

Hi Israel and Adrienne. I so admire Your relationship and the way you both approach life . The love and respect You have for each other. Truly an inspiring couple ,who without a doubt are your Authentic selves . I Pray The LORD'S continued Blessings over You. Sending Lotzzz of Love from South Africa ❤🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🇿🇦

[@valkleinhans1]

I honestly hesitated to watch this because I thought there would be a ton of terminology I wouldn't understand, but this was SO helpful! Thank you Adrienne and Israel for explaining this so well and so clearly!

[@gloriawhite8293]

Adrienne is for sure my friend in my head.....I come to you for advice daily

[@katreenaldavis]

Love that he brought up credit even as a celebrity. It pays to have your credit together. Actually, it’s essential.

[@Pink0178u]

There seems to always be one more experienced than the other which makes it soo perfect to balance eachother out . Love the content!!!

[@ourbreakthroughpodcast9353]

Thanks so much “you guys!!” I respect Adrienne a great deal, as I’ve followed her career from the beginning, and I find it to be so inspiring to see someone just like me make it in this tough industry and live the life that she always imagined. Continued blessings ❤️.

[@juanitawatson596]

Amen! Please do a thorough inspection; I am now making major repairs after 18 years in my house.

[@nepps6766]

I enjoyed this. More financial literacy content please!

[@ImnotShy85]

Thank you so much for this information. Like you said Adrienne, my mom told me no credit cards. Slowly building my credit up.

[@shernandez1581]

Thank you Adrienne. You are so nice for being transparent and giving us financial advice. You are so humble and telling us your regular fans that we can invest too-Thank you and Jesus bless you and your family 🙏🙏

[@vashticlisby9238]

This was a really awesome video, and the love between you all is so beautifulI. I appreciate your transparency and how you explained the process. I am a Realtor in California and do my best to educate my clients about home ownership. It is attainable for everyone, even if you feel you're not ready now, the first step would be to sit down with a trusted realtor and lender to look at your financial situation in order to help you create a game plan to achieve your goal. There are many programs available, some assist with down payment and closing costs. Knowledge is power. Many blessing to you all.😘 💕

[@Shenry4474]

Thank you both for your transparency. I got married in college, I was 20 still living at home and he was 28 in the service. When we got married, I came in with no debt. So, about six months in the bill collector started calling about his past due car payment. What I did not know is he was bad at paying his bills, we decided that I would be in charge of paying the bill since I worked in financing. So, during our marriage he would get credit cards behind my back or take large sums of money from out of our account. For the half of our marriage I was a stay at home mom but he felt like since he worked he should be able to spend money the way he wanted and even saying to him that it’s important to know what comes in and out the house in reference to bills, he wasn’t interested. We are divorced now and I just finally was able to get out of a situation that he got us in while married, ten years later. I would like to be remarried some day but I’m with you Adrienne, I don’t feel comfortable giving over the reins to my finances. I’ve been in banking for over twenty years, it would be nice if me and my future hubby could come together on finances like you and Israel.

[@michelledouglas4953]

Love him all you want girl but that dude was selfish. That is why I love being around women who are educated and independent. Glad you stand strong or you know what else would have happened...

[@mira7640ify]

Well all I'm saying is that I don't have a huge amount of money laying around that I could invest it in, and I understand how you all are able to do so, but with this economy right now, Gas & Food alone takes my extra $5 & $10's. Also the "Stock Market" itself is shakey like an earthquake!..Happy that you guys are able to keep your $$$ flowing!

[@sharenaruth9447]

This convo with this perspective needs to be aired on tv. It’s about what you’re taught, no credit ≠ no money just like great job ≠ stability

[@indiamcdowell53]

Interesting how the same principles apply if you're poor or rich. Managing money is Managing money. Great video and tips!!

[@timothyandsherryblair7688]

The way he looks at her…😩❤️❤️❤️

[@_thxxndo]

I just came back from paying my cc bills, don’t want to miss a payment 😊

[@jeimmyobando1393]

Wow guys thanks for bring this important topic to the table. Being financial independent is one of the main goals in my life and also have financial education to make wise decisions with the money. Adriannne, my mom gave me the same advice as you 😉I'm environmental engineer, freelance consultant, 35 years old and to this day I don't have credit card 💳, only debit card. Big hug for you and Israel.

[@ja-el5]

Great advice especially about credit 💯. Investing in anything does require a lot of self discipline for sure. I did guess correctly about Israel spending more money. I thought it would've been on clothes but spending on you is a great choice 😊👍🏾

[@Lauren-ki3xn]

This is such an incredible and important video. You 2 are such a healthy and loving couple and have set such a beautiful example here❤️

[@MadisonPettway_]

Israel looks awesome! And he looks at Adrienne with so much admiration

[@IrmaWW15]

Thank you so much for your advices for those of us who are not home owners yet. You’re absolutely a stunning blessed couple. 🙏🏽💕. Blessings.

[@Simply__Christie]

Love the transparency 👌🏽 Love when you talk about finance and investing 😉

[@MsSoaringstar18]

My XIXI package arrives today and a new All Things Adrienne video!! 🥰🥰🥰

[@mariaturner7850]

I thank you Adrienne & we as Women just buy what is needed I also think Israel seem like he budget the finances not saying you don’t know how I know you do & you all are a wonderful team working together So, keep telling us & giving us advice I need it if I decide to get Married again You all are a wonderful couple & I miss The Real please go on Podcast this is an idea you all should think about it Adrienne please you all was so amazing on the Real we need this so much I am Praying that you all stay together on A Talk Show think about it Ok, love you guys sooo, much Blessings 👩‍🎤😍🎈🎈🙏🙏❤️💜🌸🌸🌸

[@itstimefortea4582]

Wow! You’re so relatable which is great for us who are not only looking to level up but marry as well! I had the same mindset toward credit taught to me by mother. Thankfully, I ran into those that could help in a major way!

[@IraBronnson]

Here is my financial advice as a six figure earner in my 20s: if you are struggling to make ends meet and wondering how you can ever buy a home or invest, do 2 things. 1. Give yourself a break, the system is working against you. 2. Focus on increasing your income. Everyone will tell you to budget or live within your means, which is true, but there’s only so much you can do that before you’re just miserable. You can go a lot further aggressively asking for raises, looking for a new job, adding a second stream of income, etc.

[@DrLakeishaMcKnight]

Loved this video. My hubby and I bought our first house 15 years ago. It is definitely a process. Also, I will say there are better savings vehicles such as metaverse certificates (savings) that provide 73% APY. We must educate ourselves to do what's best for our families. Thank you for sharing Adrienne and Israel.

[@RGGC24]

You’re going in with the serious conversations