Marriage Part 1: What is Marriage

[@ANDRE-sp2mi]

Thank God for my soon to be marriage and family. Thank God I will always work hard for my family. Thank God for my freedom. I will always honor my marriage and family. Thank God I will work to provide for my family

[@sammich8069]

I was baptized Catholic but my family didn't practice the with nor have I ever been aware that there was a Catechism, I of course fell out of the faith and became an atheist. I soon began to find my faith again however I "converted" to protestant and married under a protestant pastor to my husband who was at the time protestant. Soon after our marriage my husband atheist which devastated our marriage, and I became lost in my faith and sought out for the truth. God led me to back home to the Catholic faith, which I am grateful. However I cannot finish my confirmation and my children cannot complete their communion unless my husband and I perform the sacrament of marriage under the Catholic Church. My husband refuses for us to be married under the Catholic Church and is now refusing to agree to raise our children, not only catholic but any christian faith. I am put in a situation where I have to deny him sex because I do not want to commit fornication. Which is damaging my marriage even more, also I have to now consider a civil divorce. I do not want to divorce my husband because we have three children but I do not want to separated from the Catholic Church and preserve my children's faith. I pray consistently and I started praying the stations of the cross however since I have it seems my husband and I become more hostile to each other.

[@mrsandmom5947]

Sophia Macken That does not make sense..as long as you were married in a Christian marriage, you are considered married in the church. If it was a civil marriage, as in at the courthouse, then you are not. I am a convert, and we married by a Methodist minister. After I converted, we had our marriage blessed in Mass. I was never asked the things you are saying..my daughter also converted. I think you need to go to your diocese and tell them you were married by a Christian minister..

[@catholicseymour292]

CalGilrl150. Unfortunately just because you are married as protestants it does not always mean that it was a Sacramental marriage. Only the Church can determine that. It all depends on what actually happened on the day of the marriage. I would recommend that Sophia ask for an investigation of an annulment simply to see if it were a Sacramental marriage, which is a valid marriage, rather than a civil marriage that does not reach the requirements of A civil marriage. Sophie may also be able to petition for a special dispensation in her case. She is truly a daughter of the Church where as he may not be a son of the Church. I honestly do not know how all this works and I am a Catholic Convert of about 11 years. I have constantly studied the one true faith since my conversion so I am not an authoritative source. Again an annulment is not a Catholic divorce. It simply asks the question was the marriage valid in the eyes of the Church and more importantly in the eyes of our Blessed Lord on the day it took place. I have this knowledge first hand from a priest friend that has set on inquiries.

[@catholicseymour292]

Sophie Macken My heart goes out to you in your struggle. Hang in there and remain faithful to your Beloved Lord I do not get the sense that you are being abused physically or anything like that But I would invoke St. Rita for women in difficult marriages. Just because you cannot receive the Eucharist right now you still have access to the sacramentals. Hang a crucifix in your home and sprinkle holy water around the house to run of any evil in your home. It is usually available in a large fountain near the back of the Church. Make a habit of saying three hail Mary's in the morning when you wake for peace in your day. Join a Rosary group that meets once a week that prays for each other. I am pretty sure that the Church already sees you as a baptized Catholic that wants to be restored to the Church or they would not insist on a sacramental marriage in the Church. The important thing is that you are in the Church and there is no reason that you cannot practice and learn the faith. Just hang in there with Jesus, Mary, and all the saints and somehow everything will be OK regardless the outcome.

[@azf4852]

Sophia Macken a friend of ours has a similar situation and was told to go to the Director that handles annulments because this man wanted his sons to be baptized. His wife is a baptized Catholic who left The faith years ago, they married in a protestant church led by her mother, through searching for truth this man was desirous to join The Church, yet put off joining The Church for a year! to hopefully encourage his wife, her mother, his father... Recently, The Director told him by Church law he himself can renew his marriage without his wife's consent by way of not receiving any sacrament for two weeks, and no marriage act because in reality they are not married. It is called a special dispensation. The Bishop will receive a document from the Director of what has taken place and will need to sign the document. A concern has come up now wondering why would the Novus Ordo Priest of 60 years service miss this important aspect and let our friend join The Church knowing full well his situation? My husband and I now have questions of our own since we are converts and didn't fully go through sacramental practices as we are learning. Always learning. Please pray for us. May God bless you and your family. Ave Maria gratia plena

[@azf4852]

I agree. On Sensus Fidelium Father has a talk titled, "Spiritual Flyswatters". Very good learning tools

[@krakusdomm]

Interesting. I wonder how matters such as this would be addressed: In one case I know, there was a man who was a virgin. A married women with two children got him drunk and seduced him, mainly for her own benefit. She had told that man that she was single. As I understand it, there was no real Catholic advisement or education available to the man but he always considered himself a Catholic (a badly informed one at that). Thus, the man's understanding was this. Because he had sex with the woman he had to marry her. Of course, she had to divorce her then husband who was married by the government. They had a quick marriage in a Catholic Church. After several years the man explained that he ended up hating everything the woman did to him. As he described her as always lying constantly manipulating and finally did not believe in the Catholic Faith or the Holy Eucharist. The man later had two more relationships but none worked out for him. He had those relationships with the idea of marriage. But they did not work out. The more I learn about the man he see's himself as in disfavor with God and ask me for answers. I just don't know what to say?

[@aznprodigy17]

+krakusdomm I think its not so much to do with God, but to do with the women in his life. Perhaps continuing to be praying for a godly woman who loves the Lord in the same way he does would be beneficial. He might meet the right one sooner or later depending on life's circumstances. Or maybe he is called to a religious life as marriage may not be his vocation?

[@albertusmagnus1]

krakusdomm Tell him to submit his marriage to a marriage tribunal and see if he has grounds for an annulment?