5 Secret Fears He Has When He Really Likes You | Relationship Advice for Women by Mat Boggs

[@matboggs]

Get coached by Mat Boggs TODAY: www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/mym/offer/strategy-session?div=lr&KZbin&Social&MYM_EVG&CNT_video

[@rezotydnic]

Five Fears When Falling In Love 1. Rejection 2. Not being good enough 3. Loss of control. 4. Commitment 5. Failure My fear atm is this. I'm friends with a younger man. We hang out alot and it's soo comfortable and we have a lot of fun together. We get along great. We made plans for evening adventure out, Halloween thing, and he says it's a date. And he meant a date date. My fear is that I fall for him, because he is a great guy, and he ends up going for someone younger, and then we lose the friendship.

[@DoTheWork4me]

Are you attracted to him?

[@rezotydnic]

@DoTheWork4me of course! He's a great guy. Good looking. A gentleman. Etc. But I will add that from first meeting I was holding back because of my hangup on age difference. And he was holding back because I'm a bit taller than him. So there was no sparking sexual chemistry but certainly chemistry in a friendship way. I could certainly fall for him.

[@stitches513]

May I ask how big the age gap is? I’m thinking that you should take the chance & go for that “date DATE” you might have a potential life partner here! Plus if he is a good friend-if the date doesn’t work out on a romantic level-he will understand that & continue to be your friend…

[@rezotydnic]

@stitches513 there's 12 years difference. The reason it bothers me is he's 12 yrs younger than me and 11 years older than my son. Lol. Ps. We had our 'date' last night, and spent biggest part of today together. I'm just going to go with the flow 😉

[@sarahshaw1990]

Don't fear the number (age). Don't look at the number. Look at the person. Both you and him need to make a decision to commit to each other because you both are right for each other. And if he leaves, he wasn't the right guy for you to begin with. let him go. God knows what's best for you. He left your life for a reason.

[@Mystic_Light]

The "commitment" is not to the individual but rather to the relationship's success. Which means we are both invested... in each other's peace of mind and health.

[@ShortDarknLovely]

One of my fears definitely is getting my heart broken. I had a persisting idea that love hurts. So I used to fear love. It was hard to let down my guard and be truly vulnerable.

[@doloresblackburn4786]

I think love does hurt. It always has in my case. So I just gave it up completely. And now, in my 70s, I have in fallen in love again! And now there is a great fear of having my heart broken once again. I really don’t want to experience this again … as it doesn’t get any easier with age! Quite the contrary, in fact.

[@debora2604]

“there is no fear in love. because love casts out fear. fear has everything to do with punishment. “ quotes why people do not understand that so many can be attracted to you but it is not love. love is all inclusive. it does not happen because you feel physical attraction. it happens because all you want and feel for the other is the best of safety, care, peace, love, happiness. these attributes come within your soul and automatically applies to the one you love. they get the first seat at your table, the first to care about, etc. Love is a natural thing not a made up one. Absolutely not played by impressions and dates.

[@AngelaWeaver-v1z]

Love ❤this response! Thank you! 👍

[@Paoula]

Totally agree😉

[@Musicisthelanguageoflove]

I risked being totally open and authentic and falling in love. He feared all of the "5" emmensely, far more than he actually wanted to go ahead and risk along with me in a relationship . So ultimately I was totally rejected by him in all of those 5 ways possible. But if one doesn't take that risk to make the step forward first, it deffinatly can't ever happen at all. Open communication has always been a challenge for him..... He is a dissmisive avoidant. Succeeding was only 25% at absolute best, but I tried anyway. I would've regretted forever not trying if I'd self sabotaged as he does.

[@doloresblackburn4786]

You were really brave. I hope the loss of this relationship was not too painful.

[@TamsPsychAdvice]

Bye to the old saying "men are simple!" Nowadays, women just want to have fun in relationships. But instead, we’re tiptoeing around, trying not to say anything that might freak the guy out instead of just being ourselves. That’s definitely not a good time! (And remember, do not get too mushy or he might bounce! Haha!)

[@mariepetterson7281]

Men are simple only to each other.

[@ElliottMorrow-fg4lc]

Yeah, well, just 'fun' isn't what we like and isn't even close to enough

[@saras.2173]

But if you’re not mushy enough, he might also bounce!! Haha I think I’m dating kangaroos out here 😂

[@CassandraSmith-w8e]

Just be yourself. If he runs, thank him. If you're afraid to let them in, work on yourself. Living in fear for any reason ruins life.

[@patybay1]

Mat, in my opinion, your best episode yet! Muchas gracias for sharing your expertise.

[@shannonfarley8583]

Protecting your heart with boundaries

[@Buggzter-n-Gallade]

My fears are that he's going to drop me because I'm not enough or too much neediness. (Anxious attachment issues and my last relationship was a 13 yr marriage of ab*se so I have to rewire my thoughts to accept him as he is and not how I'm afraid he might be) That we won't communicate well or fights will be horrible and "us" wouldn't be enough for him to attempt to make things better and build together. He is aware of my fears and struggles. I'm aware of some of his too. We are getting there. ❤

[@angelm6497]

I think if there isn't fear, there isn't enough love to make the relationship last. The best thing is to talk it through with the understanding that if you can't have an open and honest conversation, the relationship isn't worth pursuing. If you can't be authentic and accepted for yourself, then you would just be living a lie, and that's a recipe for disaster. And I think women have the same or similar fears, just from their perspective. 1. Rejection 2. Not being good enough 3. Loss of Control 4. Fear of Commitment 5. Fear of Failure 5 Fears:

[@lovamo6017]

How do we distinguish if someone is behaving this way because they 'really like us or because they're just not that into us? And, if it stems from them falling in love, what do we do to ease their anxiety so the relationship doesn't get sabotaged?

[@asikiyekennedy]

This is very informative and true as I have a guy who likes me so much from his words and actions but hasn’t said anything to me and I also pretend not to know that he likes me. All u said is absolutely true

[@tamitatangoto5134]

Same sort of thing I'm going through..😂

[@TheeJuleeBee]

haha me too girl😂

[@kimwilliford6303]

My fears are not being good enough for him, sometimes I dont know that Im beautiful, for my weight can be a problem

[@kikitaube-hansen]

What an informative video. Thank you Mat.

[@secretshaman189]

Wonderful review, thank you so much Mat, you are a gift.

[@XOChristianaNicole]

Mat, this video couldn’t have had more perfect of timing. Thank you, so much.

[@Soulmateswithl]

Very great examples

[@JesusLightsYourPath]

Fears can in fact exist when youre aware of them. Most people know what their fears are, they just don't know how to overcome them.

[@kristinolan7240]

This is so helpful! Thank you Mat ❤🎉

[@tickledcobweb8764]

Thanks very much that really explains a lot

[@shawnayacoub4765]

I'm the feminine in this situation and have ALL the same fears!!! ( 💙 _ 💙 )🤘

[@MIMIDSH]

Afraid of losing freedom, autonomy, peace of mind.

[@fatatabata]

= avoid any type of RELATIONSHIP

[@MIMIDSH]

@@fatatabata Avoid the wrong relationship

[@MariamSabaArt]

Fear of pain used to hold me back or be a source of self sabotage.

[@jaketrabryant222]

How ironic my new connection did something odd last night after we both said we really like each other and this is going very well

[@Gpeidav]

Thank you ❤

[@AnaFuentes-n6x]

I recognise the 5 of them in the guy I like

[@MichelleSummerDiiva]

My boyfriend told me today that he calls me all the time because he thought that’s what made me happy? What does that mean? He does nice things for me but it hurt me when he said that because it now feels as if he’s being pressured into doing something he’s not happy or genuinely want to do

[@Helen-jw6yb]

Definitely fear of commitment....also lack of faith in the other person to be what you hoped.

[@b.maaouiamarwa7798]

true ❤

[@DoTheWork4me]

My guy did these I believe and he broke it off, he is getting therapy, do you give him another chance in the future (I’m not waiting around) if we are both available?

[@anngengel809]

Absolutely!

[@trishmiller3701]

Fear of being used

[@daniellewegrecki8342]

These feelings go for women as well 🤷

[@mirynapoli3251]

Can one of these fears let a man decide to end the relationship?

[@kaeski2345]

Not feeling good enough is the worst emotion tbh. I need the guy to know his identity in Christ!

[@karen1946-o4b]

It sounds like one has to fix the guy, does it worth fix him?

[@Mayfloweralways]

No, he’s navigating feelings that come up. I found that the best thing to do is state the truth and give him space. So an example would be- “ i noticed you seem more distant. Are you feeling ok? Is there something you want to talk about?” If he says “i’m not sure about the relationship” you say. “Well…i really appreciate you being honest with me. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. You should only be doing this, if it’s what you really want. I think you’e amazing. It’s been so wonderful spending time with you.” And then you create space to let him sort out what he wants. Chase a man, and almost all the time, he will run the other way or possibly use you. No fixing.

[@karen1946-o4b]

@@Mayfloweralways love this!

[@LetJesusTouchUrLife]

The correct phrase in English is: “Is it worth fixing them?” 😊☺️

[@rezotydnic]

You can't fix anyone but yourself. Plus it's not your job to fix him.

[@paulaa5752]

I've always been an 'all or nothing at all' person who expects complete candor. Please don't put me in a place where I'm backtracking everything you said and did, wondering if I saw and felt things that were never really there. Choose me, don't use me.

[@anneriegourrege8797]

Well my guy left me because of fear of commitment.

[@darlenelowrie612]

I didn't know that guys had any fears.

[@danilaroche1156]

Yes they do.

[@Celia-tm1nr]

Doesn't want to be tied down.

[@joynkindness]

These fears are normal for both sexes. M arr

[@hadiza1]

💜

[@Jan-qv8ku]

Fear that I’ll pick a narcissist again.

[@ComeInPeace19]

Don’t fret! Pray, fast, get The LORD involves n Psalm 37:4. Proverbs 12:13!

[@fatatabata]

Why men don't have fear of being cheated in ?!

[@MarthaJDK]

I don't think I capable of falling in love, I have never experienced that

[@celesteredding1550]

Loving is easy, "falling" in love takes time.

[@roselahuerita]

I haven’t experience that to but fear holds me back which makes guys walk away from me

[@secretshaman189]

Falling in love is total surrender. It's hard to do sometimes.

[@rezotydnic]

Everyone is capable of falling in love. What everyone is not capable of is living in the moment and trusting yourself and the universe that if it's meant to be, it will be. Guard your heart but love is worth the risk.

[@Paoula]

I am very sorry, but I do not agree with you from my experience. Any man that fell in love with me, couldn’t do enough to make my life easier😉

[@TheJosiejumper]

And men wonder why women just do it on there own life is soooo much easier without the constant crap from a man life is easy really just bring each other love and peace and stop peeing people about simples communicate that’s it !!