Doctor REACTS to Heartstopper #3 (Anorexia or OCD)

#doctorreacts #drelliott #heartstopper #psychiatrist
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On this DOCTOR REACTS video I'm watching season 3 of Heartstopper and I'm going to react to every episode as the whole season is about Charlie's diagnosis of an eating disorder and of OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). We see his entire journey from facing the reality of the problem, to tolerating other peoples concerns, asking for help and starting treatment. We also get to disentangle anorexia from OCD and why they are so often seen togethe and how this should be treated. I'd love to know what you think.
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[@16poetisa]

I actually think that James knowing about aromanticism through a book character is a really good example of why representation matters so much!

[@efoxkitsune9493]

Great point!

[@lucasdolding6924]

I wonder if that book was Loveless 👀

[@mangantasy289]

Absolutely! I'm ace and most likely aro too. I did not know any representation of these, at least not canonically stated, and only found out in my 30ies. Here on yt, somehow, suggested vids on it. So I quess the algorithm did really get me....

[@marshallpope1387]

@@mangantasy289 Same here - I'm mid-30s and only over the past couple of years (partially through Heartstopper) have I really started to identify it in myself. I'd been aware of the concept of asexuality and I figured I was most likely ~somewhere~ on that spectrum, but it never really clicked until watching a character coming to terms with it and seeing parallels in my own life. I'd kinda wondered if I was just claiming asexuality because I didn't really date much, before realizing that aromanticism was most likely /why/ I didn't really date and tended to easily lose interest in relationships. Representation is so important.

[@mangantasy289]

@@marshallpope1387 hi, thanks for sharing. I've never had a crush, never flirted, never dated, never had a romantic partner. I did not even know about the concept until maybe 2 years ago. As young teen I wondered it I might be lesbian bc of the total lack of crushes on boys unlike my f peers. But I soon found that girls did not interest me in that way either. Then I have severe mental health issues, became anorexic at 15. Plus a terrible dysfunctional Family situation at home. Heavy really. I then thought all of that was the reason. Just too much stress, no time etc.... I did not think much of it. Until These suggestions. That quickly made me go "that's totally me!". Fealt good to have a word for it. And to know I'm neither alone nor a complete alien in that. For me another positive outcome of social media/internet.

[@mylittlepeonies8693]

I have not watched a single reaction to this season where people aren’t thirsting over Jonathan Bailey😂

[@MilesMilesCrocodiles]

Hahaha. Your eyes bulging at the pic of Jonathan Bailey was the most delightful moment of the whole video😅

[@lunatic5162]

every gay man`s dream man haha

[@mlee6050]

​@@lunatic5162 not every gay man's dream, I basically wouldn't give a second look unlike others

[@slm_766]

And some women's fantasy, as well. 🩷💜🩵

[@lunatic5162]

@@mlee6050 that was clearly a joke, dude

[@sandramatras8345]

I also think maybe Charlie touching his arm like that could have something to do with his self harm. Wounds that are healing tend to itch.

[@nataliatheweirdo]

You just flashed me back to when i used to sh ahha. It used to ITCH

[@eclipse_eternal8178]

Yeah, that makes sense, I did that when I used to sh

[@normaladjacent]

Another really great and insightful reaction. One tiny moment you didn’t include which stuck out to me in this episode was Tori gently teasing Charlie for rewrapping Nick’s present three times, and him insisting it needed to be perfect. We’ve seen throughout the show (especially season 2) how fixated Charlie is on making things “perfect” for himself, Nick, other people around him. He used that word a lot in this episode again, we even saw it in the caption of his Instagram post (“perfect day” … was it though?). The disordered eating is the most urgent concern here, you’ve talked about how medically dangerous it can be. But Charlie’s perfectionist tendencies and need for control - to avoid “doing things the wrong way,” to control every aspect of his own life, his relationship, in the first two seasons, Nick’s coming out experience - I think it’s all connected and part of his larger OCD experience.

[@ButSheDid]

I don’t know much about eating disorders, but as someone whose life used to be completely consumed by OCD, I’m thrilled to see a representation that doesn’t revolve around hand-washing or other stereotypical compulsions.

[@Emma-LynnDavis]

Joe does a good job of representing OCD and Anorexia

[@mlee6050]

I worry about Charlie asking about a banner before someone rips it down

[@Emma-LynnDavis]

@@mlee6050 what

[@hollymcl]

​@@Emma-LynnDavis That's a reference to Agatha All Along, in which Joe Locke's character has an unfortunate experience with a decorative banner 😄

[@rubysmolen5155]

one of the hardest things to do when you have a mental health disorder is to have the courage to come clean to a loved one and ask for help and hope that that loved one will believe you and work on getting you help. Admitting to yourself alone that you need help can be so difficult but telling a loved one is just as scary and challenging- will this person actively listen to me and help me find the right supports without judgement or fear that they might think you are making a big deal out of nothing- and this is still very true when you have a good relationship with the person you are trying to confide in- they did a great job depicting the worry and hesitancy of coming clean

[@ellesaaltjejenneke5400]

I’d loved a series like this when I was a teenager, cheesy or not. I’m aroace and when I was a teenager (and part of my twenties) internet didn’t exist yet and tv had 3 channels. I had a gay teacher in primary school. He was out in the seventies, which I thought was normal, but really wasn’t at the time, and I knew about lesbians too, but asexuality wasn’t known or mentioned. I thought something was wrong with me and I felt really lonely. I didn’t understand the people around me, which affected my mental health. Yes, I do need connections just not romantic ones.❤

[@georgiesuffell]

Octopi? That's a jellyfish. (and they do reproduce asexually, yes!)

[@slm_766]

I think that's why Alice included the jellyfish animation swimming around Isaac --- as his symbol --- (similar to how she has pairs of birds flying near Nick and Charlie)

[@AnxietyRat]

​@@slm_766 Additionally, it's also why butterflies are the animal that represent Elle & Tao... Because of Elles' physical transformation but also just the slow transformation of their relationship from friendship into a romantic relationship. These animals representing the characters relationships...it's a really smart show detail that does not exist in the comics in the same way.

[@VioletEmerald]

​@@AnxietyRati missed all of this wow! Thanks to everyone in this thread.

[@rjcarter2904]

I think your analysis, as usual, is excellent. I've been a psychiatrist for 45 years and ran an eating disorders program for a few years early in my career. They're a challenging group of illnesses. You did a nice job analyzing Charlie's problems.

[@jdb101585]

I'm *so* happy that some gay teens have this now (at the very least the show, at best the actual experience), but, yes, it also hurts because so many of us older people simply couldn't. It's kind of impressive how this series has evoked bouts of precisely simultaneous happy/sad tears!

[@efoxkitsune9493]

God, this is too relatable. Honestly, if I had had Heartstopper when I was in high school, I might have dealt with my own issues a lot sooner and better. I'm so glad it exists for kids now. I was in Nick's position for most of my high school years (14-19 yo). I was like all of my friends' "therapist" - you know, that friend people confide in. Obviously, I wasn't equipped for any of it. At least three of my friends were having s•icidal thoughts, one also struggled with drugs, there was even a pregnancy at one point, self harm, and eventually a s•icide attempt... as well as other stuff. I held on to all of that for them, and I was paralyzed in this state of: do I betray their trust and tell someone (and who would I even tell?), or do I honour their wishes and keep it a secret as they made me promise...? It's an awful position to be in for anyone, let alone a teenager. Friends are everything at that age. You're so scared that betraying them will just make things worse for them, maybe they have horrible families and it would be hell for them if the family found out, and perhaps you know you're their only confidant and so you're terrified that if you betray their trust, they'll stop talking to even you, and thus lose even that last outlet/place of support, and then they'll be all on their own, which would make them so much more vulnerable... so you try to "save" them on your own... Which is obviously far outside of your competence. I think that's why it felt a bit iffy to me when Nick basically forbade Tao from talking to Charlie and asking him what was wrong. It felt like Nick taking all the responsibility upon himself and almost forcefully keeping it all for himself, if that makes sense (not in a malicious way, he meant well and was just trying to look out for Charlie, but there's also almost this feeling of: "you can't help him like I can, so better leave it to me and stay out of it", wasn't there...? Or maybe that's just my projection.). Idk if I'm explaining it well. But yeah. I honestly still don't think it was quite the right choice, tbh. Or at least, not one I'd make. If I was in Nick's place now, I would probably tell Tao something along the lines of: "You know, if you're worried about Charlie, I can't tell you _not_ to ask him about it. Just please be very gentle about it, and don't push. He has a really hard time talking about it, so please respect it if he doesn't want to. Just make sure you express to him how much you care about him and that you're just worried. And that you're there for him no matter what, whether he decides to tell you or not; and that you're there to listen in case he changes his mind." I feel like by holding onto it all alone, Nick is causing a ton more stress to himself - it's a really slippery slope, as described above. And he might even be unwittingly hurting Charlie by it, shielding him from other potential sources of support; he can't make that decision _for_ Charlie. He knows him pretty well, but Tao has also known him for far longer, and you never know, some things might just be easier to talk to a best friend about... It just felt wrong to sort of take that option away without Charlie's say. Again, I know there was no malice in it, just worry. Nick did the best he knew to do. But I just wanted to share my perspective. (Wow, I originally meant to make this comment about something else entirely, but here we go lol Guess this was more pressing)

[@ChronoBio]

Excellent insight into the potential consequences for Tao and Nick (individually and relationally) from Nick’s holding onto Charlie’s problems.

[@juliagans4067]

I’m so looking forward to seeing your reaction to episode 4. It is by far my favorite!

[@slm_766]

Yes. And Doc, you might need more time for your video, because there are so many issues revealed throughout.

[@danieloneal7137]

I’m a 50 yr old gay man who can genuinely thank Heartstopper and Alice Oseman for helping me realize that I’m on the asexual spectrum. I’m not all-the-way aroace, but I’m closer to that end than the other. It was after season 1 came out and I read an article that mentioned how Alice identifies, which led to a long evening of googling. It explained so much. If only we’d had the proper vocabulary when I was in my teens and 20s.

[@VioletEmerald]

I'm sure you would relate to Cody who runs the Ace Dad Advice KZbin channel then, as he's gay and asexual too... :)

[@berf9445]

The dark cloud for me would be all the thoughts that suddenly come up "how do I get out of this" "what am I going to do" "what is the smallest amount of calories I can eat" "how can I get rid of those calories" ect. (answering while watching)

[@patrickkyteler5585]

Kit Connor said that episode 4 is his favorite because of the acting challenges. I know episodes 1-3 have been getting increasingly hard, but they are essential to understand the characters journey. This season is just so rich in story. Oh and yes, Jonathan Bailey, mmmmmm...

[@isjitaradalhard7472]

Episode 3 really struck some chords with me. I struggled with my mental health due to undiagnosed autism throughout secondary education and five years of higher education. The instinct to hide it was very strong. It would have helped me to have had friends that were this tactful and emotionally mature 😥. I told one friend, but they weren’t the greatest in handling it. I am now more open to peers (and I am in therapy), but the idea to talk about it to my parents (who are lovely people), is still terrifying. Kudos to Charlie. I was also very touched by Isaac talking about struggling with his asexuality and aromanticism. I also struggle with that: I find it confusing and scary. Attraction is confusing, plus you step out of the script of society, and those things bring a lot of uncertainty, which I don’t do well with. But then the idea of not being asexual or aromantic also scares me, because imagine me experiencing non-platonic attraction… 😬

[@angelofmusic997]

Ok. I haven't seen S3 yet, so this is my first experience with this episode. I wasn't expecting to cry when confronted by Charlie's experiences... but here I am. Thank you so much for covering this part of Heartstopper so especially well.

[@tallactordude]

This is an excellent episode leading up to what I think is may be the finest episode of the series to date. I very much relate to Charlie’s OCD, since I also have OCD, among other things, though for me, it doesn’t particularly manifest itself in food. But the setting up of rules that you feel you have to follow is something I very much identify with, even though I am more than four times Charlie’s age.

[@mangantasy289]

100% agree on the use of that darkening cloud. As someone with several comorbid mental health issues, including (by now) chronified ED and high levels of anxiety, I think it does convey that suffocating feeling brillantly. Like you said, some kind of tunnel-vision. For me very much like a shrinking of the world, like a cruel and unwanted intense and exclusive focus on what brings the anxiety. As if if the anxiety was personified, it would isolate you even more on full purpose. Like a predator separating it's choosen prey from the herd.... Very valid in my "early" Anorexia time. Like staring at that plate in the last episode. Food is the last thing you want to be confronted with. It scares you, it may even disgust you, you want to avoid it at all price. And yet you are made to and make yourself focus on it. "made to" by other people commenting on it, pressuring on it, but also by that anxiety mechanism. I remember how countless times people pressured me to eat. Sitting in front of that plate with that food. I might sit there very long, bawl my eyes out and the whole entire world around me would disappear, all I could do is stare and stare at the food, which again triggeres me even more, ending in a really vicious cycle. I'm glad I could beat that. Or maybe I did not even (?). Maybe I'm just not challenged like that any more, being an adult now. And damn, I'm just realizing that only thinking of a situation like that makes me all anxious again. Maybe I would indeed be send back to that horrible vicious cycle right away if I found myself in a situation like that again. I feel with Charlie so so much. Great acting too. Thank you again for your well spoken reactions.

[@Cyb3rC1ty]

Anyone else think Dr Elliott should react to Ren’s music? It’s heavily based in mental health and chronic illness for the most part, particularly the songs “sick boy”, “chalk outlines”, and “hi ren” but many of Ren’s other songs would be good for reactions too. Ren’s music has helped so many people and he loves people reacting to his stuff so no worry about strikes either.

[@madelynne2939]

Yes! Hi Ren! Cried like a baby the first time I heard that.

[@Cyb3rC1ty]

@@madelynne2939 me too, his music is genuinely so powerful, he’s my favourite artist and that’s big because I’ve never really had a favourite artist before

[@deoradh]

and every time Charlie's hand goes to his scars..

[@nathanielsizemore3946]

I think Charlie's body image thinking is more about the cutting/self-harm from his past.

[@SwissLotus]

i can kinda relate to mr. farouk it took me 20 years to figure out i was bi, so i def. feel like i missed out on having girl crushes in school, since i didn't know yet thinking about the things and experiences you could've had as a teenager, if you'd known and accepted earlier

[@mariannehavisham8323]

So you can be malnourished and not be underweight. My period stopped for 3 years. I was diagnosed with early stages of osteoperosis at 18 and a hormone imbalance (low oestrogen) caused by malnutrition. I was never underweight on the BMI scale I don't think or if I ever was I was barely like by a pound or two

[@corh1281]

This is so true, thank-you for sharing that. I felt faint every day for years and thought it was normal. My weight would fluctuate constantly but never fell below a normal BMI. I hope you are feeling healthier now ❤

[@mariannehavisham8323]

@corh1281 I am thank you, it took a long time

[@jamierosati3212]

I love aro ace representation. It means the world to me to have my experience represented

[@zeekslider]

This episode broke me. I am three years into my own therapy, and I wish I did what Charlie did before I started it. Write down how I have been feeling and explain that I am seeking help because I want to get better.

[@amyseaden9069]

Agree that is the sanitized oversimplified version of an ED. Not shown is how treatment resistant ED sufferers can be, manipulations around especially around food but other things, etc. Like that parents are shown as clueless which is often the case. Literally had a family member tell me that EDs are not truly about food while we have been dealing with a family member with various forms of EDs over the past 30 years. I have been telling them that since year 1 when I was a teenager.

[@ChronoBio]

The oversimplification is definitely an aspect of both the constraints of being a graphic novel/television program as well as the story’s focus “things can/will get better.” Without diving into spoilers, I’m pleased that the events tied to Charlie’s journey do have lasting effects on the characters and their relationships.

[@slm_766]

[Minor spoilers] In the Christmas episode 3x5, Charlie's relatives (as well as Nick's brother) showed the ignorance of which you speak. Also, Charlie's mom knew what Charlie was dealing with that the other relatives did not understand, but because she herself was stressed about trying to 'get through the day' and was having trouble coping -- she ended up trying to push more food at Charlie🤮 to "solve" the stresses.

[@nataliatheweirdo]

alice does mention in the tw that its based around his ed but has a hopeful ‘tone’ and it more based around recovery. I feel like you get more insight if you read solitare (or even this winter! Which was adapted for s3)

[@amyseaden9069]

@@slm_766 sadly ignorance is often not limited to those on the periphery. Find this especially with older people or people with little exposure to eating disorders.

[@amyseaden9069]

@@ChronoBio I know. Like everything in Heartstopper it is simplistic story that touches on many important topics with an optimistic tone. It is a good introduction to important topics especially for younger people. Wish life was as simplistic. Not a psychiatrist but based on my experience and knowledge treating EDs can be some of the most treatment resistant mental health conditions.

[@georgechristianjr]

nxt episode 4 is the GREATEST episode of #Heartstopper

[@littlemissshank6889]

I'd love to hear your views about Ali on Big Brother if you're watching it this year, especially as she's a psychologist and has been really interesting on the show so far

[@Catherine25x]

Could you react to waterloo road and prestons ed?

[@sarah.the.clumsy]

Wait.... is Charlie's house the same layout/floor plan of the Dursleys in Harry Potter!?!

[@Callimachus33]

Octopus is Greek, not Latin. It literally means "Eight Legged". So the original plural would be "octopodes", but in English octopuses is most commonly used.

[@efoxkitsune9493]

...although it was in fact a jellyfish lol

[@danieloneal7137]

People worry too much about how to pluralize “octopus” … octopi may be technically incorrect but it’s one of those usages that has essentially become acceptable through repeated use. Only pedants and English teachers actually care. Language is a living thing that evolves and adapts. If you understood what he meant, then the act of communication was successful. (P.S. I’ll bet your autocorrect accepts the word octopi. Mine does.)

[@Callimachus33]

@@danieloneal7137 he literally asked what was the correct plural, also my autocorrect does not accepts it, it only accepts octopuses.

[@slm_766]

@@danieloneal7137 Not all English teachers; some are aware of linguistics, also.

[@simoneyoung825]

Would love to see your insight on sweetpea x

[@doryinsanime6862]

I love your reaction my favorite show.

[@Saiyanprince1114]

Weight definitely comes into play with his body image issues, but it seems to be more struggling to smile. There are a couple of moments in the season where he's practicing in the mirror and he doesn't seem to be able to.

[@vip7955]

I’m wondering for how many more videos we’ll get to see the not at all distracting (but certainly very interesting) white something on the otherwise very black turtleneck 👉🏼👈🏼

[@AliceSylph]

Looks like you have a lightbulb stuck in your ear 💡 For me, eating disorders developed because of lack control of what was happening around me and to me. It did get significantly better when I became an adult and started living independently, could have control about my life and who was in it, including when and what and if I ate. For some people that free choice can make it worse or better

[@mlee6050]

I thought him breaking the food into bits was a method to make it easier so felt less of a chore for him to eat

[@normaladjacent]

Or he could have rules about how many pieces the food is in, how many bites he should eat. I think they are deliberately vague about what exactly the rules are. It could be a combination of all of these things too.

[@GirliestMammy]

💖

[@berf9445]

This is hard to watch, particularly Charlie asking for help. I've never asked for help. I've actively avoided it and pushed it away. So, it makes me... I dunno, lock up. Feel afraid.

[@aliteralpipefish]

It's octopuses, and they're not asexual! But they are very LGBT+ inclusive, as are many residents of the sea.

[@its19.19pmrightnow]

Please, please, please react to gilmore girls!