Minnie Driver Gets Closure Over Late Father | Who Do You Think You Are

Minnie visits Matlock in Derbyshire to see where her father received psychiatric treatment. She discovers how he was married and gets to see a photo from the wedding to Anne Wilshaw.
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Hollywood actress Minnie Driver is on a mission to find out more about her late father, Ronnie, and his family's background. Minnie's parents were not married, and Minnie only discovered when she was older that her father had a wife and another family all the time Minnie's parents were together. Minnie knows her father was awarded a medal for his role in the battle of Heligoland Bight during World War Two, but is shocked to discover that he apparently threw it away. She sets out to investigate why her father would relinquish such an honour. The trail leads Minnie to relatives she never knew existed, and she discovers a kindred spirit in the family.
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[@richardlow6648]

I don’t think it’s significant that he was not wearing his medal in the wedding photo. One would not normally do that. However, the ribbon is sewn on his uniform as it should be. It’s the one with the diagonal stripes. Any time I see that ribbon I know I’m in the presence of a hero.

[@maxwellmoore8424]

@@andrewwebb-trezzi2422 He threw it to too all ,who sacrificed their Lives for this small country, to keep it flowing through us all , its a simple Lording, FREEDOM.

[@heidilynns9207]

Amazing

[@AM-qu4qt]

She was reaching a bit with most of what she said. Trying to find significance in every tiny detail

[@rolandhicks1874]

Appearantly you never had a father or you’d understand her

[@georgielancaster1356]

I don't think most are aware of the use of ribbons, rather than medals here.

[@earlc5990]

I think I read at the time in the US they called it "shell shock" later to be officially named Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) for soldiers who returned changed by their experience in combat. My father who is now 92 was in the Navy in the Pacific Campaign. After Japan surrendered he joined the Army Air Force. He was promoted to drill Sargent then let go due to PTSD. His purple heart, bronze star, and PTSD came with alcoholism into my family on the Navajo reservation. I have a special place in my heart for all veterans from any country because of it. He never talks about it and someday he will hear taps for the final time. May they all find peace, forgiveness, and be brothers. Thank you for sharing your stories.

[@kyrilascully7828]

Minnie, if you can read this, please know you're not alone in discovering your dad's mental issues during the war. My dad worked a crash boat toward the end of WW2 in the Philippines where the Japanese were relentless in their cruelty. My dad's job on that boat was to rescue and recover bodies and sailors from sunken ships. There is no telling what he saw. My dad suffered PTSD for the rest of his life. It was confusing to us as kids, but I understand it so much better now, Thanks for sharing your journey, and your dad's journey.

[@serpentines6356]

Thank you for sharing that story about your dad. I really appreciate reading everyone's story. Or, I should say the little bits of their survival stories. May your dad RIP. 🙏 💜

[@felicitybywater8012]

Kyrila, your dad did one of the hardest jobs of wartime. I wish he had had relief from his PTSD.

[@Celticcross688]

Bless them all, my Father too suffered PTSD at 26 admitted to Haslar Hospital Portsmouth. Served on HMS Suffolk North Atlantic.. My Father died young at 53 in 1971.. I was just 14.

[@Laura_MaestraDeIngles]

Kyrila, I am always amazed by what these young men endured. My grandfather also served in the Philippines. He became a prisoner of the Japanese there, survived the Bataan Death March and 3 subsequent p.o.w. camps. After nearly 4 years as a prisoner, he somehow went on to marry and raise 3 children. He was a wonderful grandpa to us. He, too, fought inner demons, but he was a fun and loving grandparent. We owe a lot to men like him and your father.

[@marywood8794]

@@Laura_MaestraDeIngles How wonderful that he was able to be a good grandfather with all that he must have gone through. It's a testament to him and the power of love.

[@erad67]

Minnie is only 3 years older than me, but my great-grandfather, not father, was in the war. He was awarded a Silver Star. He also threw it away. My grandfather fished the award out of the garbage can and kept it. My great-grandfather said "The only heros are dead heros."

[@whodat4124]

Survivor's guilt may have played a role too. He lost his best friend. GREAT series about Minnie's journey. She is so lovely!

[@elizabethbrown8833]

My Dad who was at Dunkirk, would never share about his experiences, neither my Grandad who fought at The Somme, its no surprise wearing medals wouldn't feel right for many Soldiers, most remember and consider the Fallen to be the real Heroes. God Bless All. 💜🙏🌎🌌

[@scottgarrity989]

It would be a amazing find and recovery of your father, air medal from that river!

[@lizziemitchell3900]

I remember my uncle coming back from Vietnam, he was dropped of at the station and told to go home ,he was never given any assistance for counselling etc, he suffered with anxiety and other mental issues up til he's death .

[@hughjazzole2037]

1 of the nurses that took care of my mom said her husband suffered from Agent orage& it was driving him crazy,finally he went out behind their barn *& shot himself,,all cause of Agent orange & protecting the bottom line..

[@Tawadeb]

Thats shocking. Plus the public was against them.

[@strong_voice_of_truth]

So many men were wrecked by Vietnam. I know of two in my family alone. These politicians ought to consider the heavy consequences of their decisions.

[@keithwalker5078]

My dad had multiple traumatic experiences and had 4 purple hearts and NEVER talked about it

[@a.b.creator]

My grandfather had a purple heart and never ever spoke about it either.

[@kirstymiller9332]

Wow. Thank you for this. Tears are streaming down my face as I remember my grandfather's words. "This is for you. I took it with me to war to remind me of your grandmother. I lost it when we went into the sea. My mate drived into the sea and got it back. I watched as he died standing next me." I felt his pain then. I feel his pain more. I miss him and wish I could hug him. 😪🤗

[@johncritch6812]

Your dad was a real life hero Miss. Driver. His little girl can fall asleep each night knowing that.

[@auggied6760]

Yes. And what a beautiful comment!

[@johncritch6812]

@@auggied6760 thanks

[@YaYaPaBla]

@Nicky L shut up

[@YaYaPaBla]

He was a human being, he served in the war. He had a personal life. None of us are perfect. Bless Minnie for learning about her dad and his side of the family.

[@xl51956]

It is wonderful that Minnie can understand her father's casting of his medal in too water and the significate gestor that this meant to him, a real hero and friend !!

[@DETROIT1948]

Robert Lindsay USMC Vietnam Combat Veteran 67 18yr old door Gunner on a Helicopter. Air Medal. I've had PTSD ever since. War Is Hell.

[@enegron6987]

Robert Lindsay I know your generation didn’t get the respect you deserved when you got home, for that I’m really disappointed, I just want to say thank you for your service Marine💫✨💎

[@laura.redfield]

Robert Lindsay - Thank you for your service, sir.

[@DETROIT1948]

@@laura.redfield You are welcome. Thank you for your kindness and respect.

[@DETROIT1948]

@@enegron6987 You are welcome. Thank you for your kindness and respect.

[@grimreaper337]

You deserved better sir Welcome home Thank you for your service No greater love a man has than this . Some gave all , all gave some . I work as a plumber/ pipefitter at a VA hospital. people have no idea . I see pain in so many eyes . Nothing but respect

[@johnscurich6446]

The story of Minnie's dad is so very similar to my own father who served in the Pacific during WW2 in the U.S. Navy. As I grew up he would always politely deflect my questions on his experience in the war. It wasn't until towards the end of his long life did he finally start telling me things. I believe it was my taking him to the National World War II/D-Day Museum in New Orleans that encouraged him to give me more detailed accounts of his experience. Since Minnie's father was an airman, if she hasn't done so already, she needs to watch the movie "The Best Years of Our Lives" directly by William Wyler. Great movie that goes into the post-war trauma these courageous man endured.

[@Roybhoy888]

No denying your father Minnie you are a spitting image of him..a brave man who ultimately was destined to get PTSD as I well know serving in the Gulf war..god bless.🙏❤

[@Dana-wq5tp]

My father fought in WWII under Patton. He was in Reconnaissance divisions and needless to say, saw many horrible things throughout his tours of France, Italy, Africa, etc...He never talked about it, never sought out for anyone to listen to him and in retrospect, I feel extremely sorry for him because he was carrying horrific memories and the loss of many friends. He battled alcoholism for most of his adult life after the War and it had a profound effect on our family. I never knew he was awarded the Bronze Star and several other medals until after he died and they sent his medals to the house. The only time I ever asked him about the War was when I was curious about what Patton was like because I had just watched the film with George C. Scott. He said he was a genius and crazy. That's all he said and never brought it up again. Never had any desire to watch the movie. Anyway, watching this video with Minnie was sad to me and I started to cry when they said he didn't have his medals on in the wedding photo. It made me think of my Dad and what he must have went through. Mostly in silence.

[@Scott2148]

Blessings to all who serve and thank you to Mr Driver. There is now another war in Ukraine, when will we learn. Thank you for telling this story.

[@serpentines6356]

Unfortunately, there will always be evil people in the world. The West needs to stay strong.

[@carlcurtice7914]

He literally is wearing the DFM; it's the ribbon with the angled stripes. It's the ribbon version of the medal, but anybody can google the DFM and see a picture of the actual medal and the ribbon version. The producers of the show should have checked this.

[@sundromos9456]

You'd think the fellow showing her the photograph would have known that too.

[@sarahdee374]

Such bravery, to walk with courage towards an awful experience. what we ask of such young men is horrendous.

[@maxwellmoore8424]

JUST think what your father was thrown into ,at a young age ,totally Frightening. He was, and always be in my eyes an hero , Nothing will ever change my opinion. LEST WE FORGET..

[@hilaryc3203]

My father went to war when he was 18, serving in Burma (now Myanmar) with the RCAF, against the Japanese. He only talked about the fun and interesting things, but it was my aunt who told me how he came home changed, with stories of picking up his friends body parts when their planes crashed, near death experiences, horrible sights. I know he came out the victor when a local sympathizer came at him with a knife one night and there were probably many more instances. But..that generation kept things to themselves. Later when I was around 14, he told me that a gentleman doesn't visit those things on his wife and family; that they just get on with life and not burden family with what happened. "They gave their todays, so we could have our tomorrows", was a line I saw in one of his RCAF papers, and I've never forgotten it.

[@felicitybywater8012]

Lest we forget.

[@maxwellmoore8424]

@@hilaryc3203 Yes it's a line ,I'll never forget, LEST WE FORGET.

[@marksanchez8055]

I was watching a show that someone found an exact medal in the Thames a few years ago

[@mcfunwow]

Seriously? You should really contact this show and let them know. If they could possibly find it, I'm sure Minnie would be so grateful and surprised.

[@sheerluckholmes5468]

@@mcfunwow Medals have the recipients name engraved on them so would not be hard to ascertain correct ownership.

[@mcfunwow]

@@sheerluckholmes5468 Yes, but that's assuming the person that found it bothered to try to find the family, or maybe they tried and failed. Anyway, worth a try to find them and let them know that Minnie would love to have it! (I'm assuming, despite the difficult circumstances.)

[@jonathanhorne6503]

My dad was a US naval aviator winged in 1941. I learned a lot about war history so I would know relevant questions to ask. He died in 2016 at age 99. Lucid to the end. After seeing this I hope I didn’t open any old wounds or unpleasant memories. He never freely talked about it, he thought no one was interested. I’ve met two of his crew members and several friends from those times. He did answer all my questions. I’m blessed to know him a decade before I was born.

[@Ruthie888]

How did I not know Minnie was a Brit? I love all her films. My dad was an American pilot in the army air-core and flew many missions over Iwo Jima. He met the man who took the famous Iwo Jima photo of raising the flag. The photographer printed a copy for my dad from the original negative that my family still has. My mother showed it to me when I was young. He was scarred by the war and very rarely talked about it. I only heard snippets from my mother.

[@EMVelez-qb1zu]

You thought she was American? Why? She rarely plays Americans.

[@LisaNH934]

Minnie is just lovely 💞

[@kaizenlife1152]

It’s hard losing a best friend.😓

[@Skatejock21]

History of who we are is so important. We all will have difficulties to share with future generations and even after we have passed. We just cannot judge the past by todays standards, this is how you will not understand what our relatives went through.

[@cammierudge365]

Maybe he wasn’t throwing it away, but giving it to his friend

[@cababyboomerq6012]

Wow, she looks like her father!

[@mariansmith7694]

Many decorated soldiers and airmen would throw their metals in the river, and still do. My son did same with his Purple Heart 💜

[@pamelaneckelmann5414]

Minnie, I love you and the wonderful human being you are. I so wish you happiness while re-discovering your family roots. Big hug to you from Chile.

[@georgielancaster1356]

Hi Pamela, did you know of Margot, 'Chile' Duhalde, who flew for the ATA, in WW2? She had a rivalry with a Polish girl, that kept many other flyers amused. They just didn't get on! It is said that Margot and the Polish girl - I can't think of her name! were said to be the only women who had a dogfight - without ammo. They both came in to land, and neither would let the other one land first! It was a famous dong dong - and they got a huge bollocking, but if you don't know of Margot, you may well enjoy finding out about her and the other extraordinary ATA girls.

[@jennifer_m.8613]

My grandfather didn't have PTSD from WWII (he was wounded in the Battle of the Bulge), but he only spoke about it once - about 6 weeks before he died suddenly, I interviewed him about the war for a history report

[@englishrose4388]

He may have thrown his medal into the river out of survivor’s guilt, not feeling worthy because he couldn’t save his best friend.

[@marilynhoward380]

My uncle flew 3 tours in WW2 and never set foot in a plane ever again.

[@MegaSickcat]

It was later to be referred to as PTSD....they just didn't know what it was back then.

[@dogsnads5634]

They actually did. In WW1 it was called Shell Shock, then in WW2 called Combat Stress. The British Military got very adept at dealing with it. In Normandy due to the intensity of the combat there were hospitals set up well behind the lines where soldiers who were showing signs of Combat Stress could be taken out of the line and given a chance to recuperate, usually with rest and sedatives. I don't think the US had a similar system but it ensured that the British Army at least had lower levels of Combat Stress casualties than the US Army did.

[@lilacswithtea]

Walter Lilley is lovely name. It informs the delicacy of human life and brings that context to his death.

[@maureenobrien9815]

Sensitive, poetic thought. ❤

[@sunking3836]

Very thankful to have found your family story here “ glimpse” into your life as it is ,… very powerful experience for you and happy for you and your son ,.. most gorgeous story.

[@ryandavis7593]

My grandfather said that the heroes never came home.

[@carolinebesinger8611]

Thank you darling Minnie, it only makes me more understanding about my family secrets! May God keep you and your lovely son Henry blessed & well. I have love learning about your family's/ journey! Truly amazing!

[@keithwalker5078]

these are such revealing trips for these celebrities who find out so many things that they have no idea about with their families. loved this show.

[@kpire6066]

Her search has been so lovely. This story was so well done. XO

[@maryfrump7937]

My Dad was in Ww2. He was 50 when they had me. He never told me anything about the war other than going to several places and that he had a pet monkey while on ship.

[@geoffpoole483]

Very similar to the situation concerning my dad. I knew which ships he served on but that was about it.

[@erikpeterson25]

Stories that need to be told.....thank you 💕❤

[@janosik150]

He threw medal into water, to give the medal to all those who died.

[@catewagner290]

What a gift to follow this beautiful story/discovery of family history and legacy. ❤

[@1beyond]

What a fantastic story

[@RichardSmith-qw7kh]

Hi pretty lady. How are you doing today?????

[@diahannkanich1747]

Wish my Dad got help for his issues...

[@melindarozas1334]

Awesome story!!

[@traceygomes809]

What an extraordinary story. Wow.

[@danielludlow8960]

So far this is the 3rd I have watched. It's very fascinating watching a daughter learning about her father! Most often the history we generally want to know....is from the point of our first memories.

[@derekwhite2929]

They're (we're) still not great with PTSD. Although very different causation, nothings been done with mine

[@carlrowland3757]

It seems to me that he thought his friend deserved the medal more than him and this is why he threw it into the water. I myself have always said those who died in battle were the heroes not us who lived to see another day. 💂🏻‍♂️🇬🇧

[@serpentines6356]

Yes. That's what they say. The survivors can take the medal, knowing they are taking it for their buddy who was the 'real' hero that died. It's the symbol for the bit of history they lived through, but their buddies didn't.

[@smacwhinnie]

Medals not called for to get married

[@nillyk5671]

Wars are horrific.

[@monicadahl7715]

Wow she looks so much like him. I wish I could know what it was like and could have met my dead relatives before they died. Someday I will meet.

[@cathylaycock5598]

My Dad never talked about his years in WWII.

[@kensummers7757]

He is also wearing an AG (air gunner) wing, not pilot's wings

[@seangraver5511]

i threw my medals in a bin .. i just never thought anything about them .. I JUST DID MY JOB i was expected and paid to do .. thats all xx

[@Pou1gie1]

@5:30 Minnie didn't look happy when he mentioned the fact that her father married up in status. This is possibly because he cheated on that woman in the photo with Minnie's mother, her father's mistress, and made Minnie just as her father's father had done to create him. I don't think she wanted the sticky part about her father cheating on his wealthy, connected wife to be brought into the show.

[@0ldb1ll]

In the photograph @5.07 of Minnie's father, he is wearing the single wing and AG badge of an air-gunner.

[@Alvan81]

Man, poor guy won a Distinguished Flying Medal while helping save crew members. Except the one he cared about the most: _his best friend.._ 😢

[@ericchristopher1687]

I wonder if Minnie Driver has ever read the WW1 Regeneration Trilogy by British novelist Pat Barker? One of the main characters in those books was real-life British officer Siegfried Sassoon, who also was sent to a military hospital after the horrors of trench warfare in Europe laid him low. Those novels really gave me (I believe) some measure of understanding about what our ancestors went through during both World Wars.

[@lordricky1446]

My fiance is four sheets to the wind. He keeps talking to me and I'm not feeling well and trying to watch my videos.

[@barrynash1676]

Minnie, there is a great video put out by the Canadian war amps I believe, called "Bomber Boys". It is a great video that should be seen. I will not go into detail but it shows what the young men in bomber command went through. Please seek and view as it is truly worth the time. May explain a lot for you. Bless your late father for his service

[@wayne8276]

Wow

[@Earthy-Artist]

That makes perfect sense, seems like by throwing it in the water he was giving the metal to his dear friend who had not been decorated.

[@georgielancaster1356]

Why wasn't Walter Lilley given a medal? It is said that to get the DFM, (the equiv of a DFC), for non officers, ie sergeants, etc, they had to do about double what an officer would do, for a DFC. Now that is unfair to a number of incredible officers, but the fact is, those making the decisions had a limited number to award. It isn't just about if you did what won a DFM a year ago, that you would also win... It depended on how many other claimants, how many in your squadron had already won a medal... Amongst a lot of bravery, was the bureaucratic cynicism and cold blooded decisions about not letting too much clustering of awards appear, that made men cynical about medals and angry at the unfairness. When you stop to think about fighting in extremis, the likelihood is, more men will do a desperate act of bravery, at the same time! It is no surprise that most of the military - including medal winners, felt a degree of discomfort and cynicism about medals. It may be that Ronnie getting a DFM, the officers doling out the medals probably gave the pilot a medal and then said2 per plane is enough.

[@marianlyons5130]

She should go to a good intuitive. Lots of Military have suffered from ptsd from any war.

[@wila4134]

WAR, all wars will leave deep emotional scars on soldiers,airmen,sailors. As a son of a war veteran, I journeyed like Minnie to understand who my dad was before & after the war. You learn to love & understand even more because part of them lives on in you. Share it with family. Its a priceless heirloom. 🇺🇸 🇬🇧

[@charliep5139]

Sadly, it was the same for the US. Being in the US Army Air Forces had the highest casualty rate of any branch of the military. The only service with higher rates were the men who served on the Liberty Ships....

[@michaeltaylor8835]

PTSD

[@beachrose88]

Her dad was handsome .poor guy traumatized by war. No metal. But maybe still survivors guilt.

[@ewazosia3779]

Czemu to nie jest tłumaczone w Polsce na j.polski

[@gayeinggs5179]

My uncle roger hinton was on a bomber he was 19 years old lost over the English Channel he was a gunner and the plane was never found coming back from bomb raid. In Germany

[@Tawadeb]

How tragic. May he rest in Peace forever

[@sugarkane4830]

Lest we forget

[@julesj5853]

I think more soldiers back then were able to get past their "PTSD" because there was no real label and there was a message of hope of moving past it. Were as today, you're slapped with a label and you're stuck with it the rest of your life!

[@beachrose88]

Prob Allll her dad's military buddie died and he always felt survivors guilt whole life

[@mikekroft86]

I can see her in him

[@joprocter4573]

Why would she not ask his first wife n kids for family ancestry

[@serpentines6356]

Very handsome man. So, I guess they had kids. But, I wonder if Minnie met them? I would want to meet my relatives.

[@beachrose88]

You cannot just give up and off self..that's weak. One step onward

[@darindavis6291]

Her grandfather? She was born in 1970. She couldn't have a father in ww2..

[@robertmccardle5113]

l was born 1966 . my granfather served in the first war, my father served in RCAF in the 2nd. he was a bombaimer on Stirling and complete a tour of Operations. yes l was a suprise.

[@silverbaker2194]

Why not? My father was and I was born around that time. My father was born in '23.

[@smacwhinnie]

Mid life affair

[@iggy8702]

Her father was born in 1921 making him around 20 during WW2 and 49 when Minnie was born.

[@serpentines6356]

@@iggy8702 Yep. Quite simple. Nice looking, dynamic middle aged man meets younger beautiful woman. That happens a lot.

[@beachrose88]

Minnie not having info or dad .it made her a stronger woman and more confident. Not a weak daddy's insecure girl always needing dads praise.

[@leejohnston2003]

Very stuck up woman this one

[@susie.goodwin1356]

Never got that sense. She's British, so her accent can give off that assumption. Minnie has played lots of American roles and has often dropped her British accent.

[@SteadyPlaying]

Very weird comment. Stop projecting your own issues onto others.

[@peterdalyy3542]

I dont think she was as you say being stuck up I thought she gave a very English impression

[@leejohnston2003]

I seen her in Stockport a few years ago.She was filming for who do you think you are, she looked me up and down like a piece of dirt, naturally I gave her a look back hence why I made that comment

[@leejohnston2003]

@@SteadyPlaying How is it a weird comment?

[@englishrose4388]

He may have thrown his medal into the river out of survivor’s guilt, not feeling worthy because he couldn’t save his best friend.