Mormon prophet's TOTALLY NOT CULTY birthday party

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Hi friends! If you want to help us keep the channel alive, please consider supporting us in one of the ways listed in the description box! 🩵 We need all the help we can get! And thank you so much if you already do. :)

[@AndImsomelady]

Brother from another mother has such different connotation in Mormonism.

[@AprilFriday-de6vm]

😂😂😂

[@peterhoyt2529]

Russell’s oldest daughter is 76, and his current wife is 74. 😯

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

THANK YOU LOREMONGER PETE

[@joshuagies4900]

😳

[@BunnyWatson-k1w]

He likes them young. And so does Dallin Oaks.

[@bl3343]

​@@BunnyWatson-k1w Bring'em Young!

[@froggie9871]

🥴

[@monkeytime3169]

Can't believe an apostle roasted his ass 😭 "He's as old as bandaids"

[@jonathanhibberd9983]

But not nearly as useful.

[@jewelgazer]

The longer Nelson lives, the less time we’ll have to deal with Oaks.

[@AndImsomelady]

Everyone silver cloud has a shite lining, I guess.

[@G2235]

Agreed! Oaks gives me the chills… traumatizing talks.

[@LaLaJonesG]

Pathetic

[@paulinebenjamin613]

You don’t have to deal with him because you aren’t apart of our church

[@Anon-qs3jd]

If/when you two decide to pivot your content to non Mormon subjects, just know I will be here and cheering you on the whole way! I’m here because your insights have made a huge difference in my life, definitely regarding deconstruction, but also just life in general. Your deep conversations combined with humor are so refreshing, it’s like talking to your best friends. Thank you for that!!! I hope you’re able to put your mental health first in whatever you decide to do going forward. Sending my love and support!

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

💜💜💜!

[@Sparkling34]

I'd say they already have pivoted to non-mormon content, I don't think of them as a channel about mormonism just a channel with mormon roots

[@AndImsomelady]

Spiral notebooks were also invented the same year, but I just can’t find the divinity in it.

[@dcliddell96]

7:58 new revelation: Lego is allowed for Mormons older 100

[@yertletheturtle5843]

I feel like Wendy married him in his 80s thinking how many years can he have left?

[@jewelgazer]

Was she really never married? Do the prophets really have to marry single women only that have never been married? That is so weird. Something must be missing. I can’t figure it out.

[@davidfoust9767]

​@jewelgazer in the next life they believe men can have multiple wives but women can't have multiple husbands. A Mormon woman who was widowed would already be sealed to her husband who died, so they wouldn't want to marry her because in the next life she'll belong to her first husband and they want more wives for their next life.

[@jewelgazer]

@@davidfoust9767 Thank you so much for this information!

[@rebeccacampbell585]

Did you ever hear the rumor that Nelson is a polygamist and wendy was wife 2 and sherri was wife 3? Wendy and Sherri dew also lived in a home right next to him so that gave the rumor extra weight.

[@jewelgazer]

@@rebeccacampbell585 Who is Sherri? I know he is sealed to his first 2 wives so he will practice polygamy in heaven but I have not heard of Sherri.

[@touretteslife]

“Don’t harass people for someone’s birthday. If you want to help him, get open heart surgery or something.”😆

[@I_Am_Monad]

Russell M. Nelson has been a priest of the Latter Day Saints for 92 years. Just think of how many falsehoods he has been able to believe and preach to others in that amount of time. Amazing!

[@alexhidell4546]

100 years of drinking the Mormonism Kool Aid. Wow!

[@SteveSmith-os5bs]

Nelson has been involved in mixing the kool aid for most of the century.

[@AndImsomelady]

The devil takes a long time to claim his own.

[@xenuburger7924]

I’ll be impressed when the Prophet celebrates his eleventy first birthday like Bilbo Baggins

[@nova_violin]

There’s got to be a magical CTR ring involved 😂

[@ryangarrard3135]

​@@nova_violinthe one ring to grift them all, and in the gaslight blind them

[@nova_violin]

@@ryangarrard3135 LOLLLLLL dying 🤣

[@rucksacks]

​@@ryangarrard3135 HOLY SHIT. God-tier wordplay 🙏

[@FishareFriendsNotFood972]

It's not the number of years in your life, it's the amount of life in your years.

[@Maryfs1]

It's creepy how much they practically worship him.

[@oddcheese6384]

Reminded me of footage from the FLDS church of them worshiping their senile old prophet before Warren took over.

[@salyx]

“Do a key change, you coward!” 😂 I am feeling Tanner’s fatigue. What kind of content would he want to be making right now?

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

THE CLAYMATION PODCAST, RETURNING SO SO SOON

[@joshuagies4900]

I am so here for it 💥

[@richbrown6968]

Cry Zelph.

[@dorimosher9800]

Thanks!

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

[@AnxiousCat-p4n]

My parents made me and the rest of my TBM siblings watch the broadcast and at Holands comment I was like "!!???" And I was trying to see if anyone else in my family thought that was weird how Holland made the invention of the bandaid about Nelson, when it had no correlation to him, but uh, no. My parents were like "huh" like this was some new revelation instead of the fact that in the 1920's a lot of things got invented. It's amazing how many hoops leaders will go through to insert God into every historical event possible when it fits their narrative regardless of if it makes sense. Being the only one in my family-that hasn't already left-with some cognative dissonance about the church is terrible. But it was nice this time around to know that I wasn't weird for thinking what Holand said was off-putting and ridiculous.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

“Huh” 😂

[@AndImsomelady]

Benson considering Dwight Eisenhower a pinko, is one of the craziest things.

[@shelbyacosta9057]

Him hitting the balloon is serving Bill Clinton at the 2016 DNC lmao

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Hahahaha

[@gingerninja137]

wanted to say thank you for all the exmo and non-mo content!! started my journey with you guys, been here four years and counting, and your insights into general wellness and mental health have been really helpful alongside the deconstruction 😊💜

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Ahhhh yay!! ♥️

[@nathanbigler]

Russell Nelson's age in 1978 is one of my favorite facts to pester Mormons with

[@michelleswapp7219]

Wendy Nelson WROTE A WHOLE SEX BOOK after marrying Russell. 😂 I'd love to listen to you react to that.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

SORRY WHAT??????

[@michelleswapp7219]

@@ZelphOntheShelf "Purity and Passion" 😂

[@nova_violin]

Omg you’re kidding!

[@mikesimmons6703]

Turning “Mormon” into a pejorative is one of the greatest gifts Nelson has given the church. All that sweet, sweet persecution that’s happening now whenever someone says the m-word!

[@christinabellini537]

I’ll say it again, cuz it’s true and cuz I’m commenting for the algorithm: I’ll do happily watch whatever you feel like uploading. I would enjoy seeing you having more joy.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

🥹♥️

[@Moundfreek]

It's true. I listen to Zelph for the wisdom and quips. I relisten for the dulcet tones. Some folks use mediation podcasts. I use Sam and Little Orphan Tanny for chill background vibes.

[@AndImsomelady]

I think I heard a song once about how great it is to be a profit.

[@anneburnett3268]

Tanner's laugh is one of my favorite sounds.

[@jewelgazer]

Oh well at least his celebration was not as elaborate as his 95th in the conference center.

[@maggielovestoads]

2:17 I have an exmo friend who’s dad got divorced from her mom but is still sealed to her. He then got sealed to my friend’s step mom. Step mom had a husband that had passed away BUT in order to marry friend’s dad, she had to get UNSEALED to her dead husband. So he’s technically married to 2 living women, and she had to basically say “Feck U I’m outi” to her husband that died

[@GhostIntoTheFog]

One-hundred percent relate to having sensory issues with jewelry and with ties, lanyards or anything else around my neck. When I was a kid, I was terrified that if I ever got married, I would have to wear a wedding ring all the time and be in constant sensory discomfort. Whenever I attend any kind of convention, I always bring a little namebadge clip with me in case they’re using lanyards.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Ahhh yes! When I was married (happily!) I couldn’t stand wearing a ring! Haha

[@Karin-fj3eu]

As a kid I also had a huge issue with t-shirt collars or zippers too high up on jackets. Also definitely rings but funnily enough I recently started wearing rings cause I got some that I liked so much I didn't care 💀 so now as long as they fit and they look cool enough I'm fine with rings 😂

[@danieljohncarey7917]

Heck darn! I forgot it was Rusty's birthday. Thank you for filling us in about that gaudy event. Yes, very cult celebration. I met Rusty on my mission. He came to see us. Lucky us. 👀 Other missionaries were lined up to meet him. I was trying to get past the line to get to the bathroom. He grabbed my hand and started asking me too many questions about myself as he continued to shake my hand. I wanted to let go, but he held on as he gazed at me, as if he were interested in everything I said... that I wasn't interested in saying... as I really only wanted to go to the bathroom. Then I got accused of cutting in line by some of the catty missionaries. Ugh.

[@endyg9845]

I’m sorry you can’t escape the pressure to keep producing Mormon content, but dang- *chef’s kiss* Gold

[@michelleswapp7219]

If a woman has been sealed in the temple, she can't be sealed to another man unless she gets a temple divorce. So if prophets want to marry another "righteous" woman in the temple, she can't have been sealed. Men can be sealed to as many women in the temple as they want. 🤮 this policy affects widows and divorced women in the church deeply.

I always think of him as Mr Burns' evil twin, so being this old kind of fits.

[@nova_violin]

Omg this 😂😂😂

[@hownovel9]

And the worst part of all of this is Rusty has the same birthday as me 😢

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Nooooo ♥️♥️♥️ happy belated birthday though ✨

[@scottevensen2615]

Rusty who? This is your day! Happy birthday!! 🥳🎉🍾

[@ryangarrard3135]

Happy belated birthday 🎂 🎉

[@lilyarngoblin]

Not only did Joseph Smith not believe in separation of church and state, he actually believed in (and coined, I believe) the concept of a Theodemocracy. Which honestly is basically what Utah is!

[@kellybrandon1179]

Church, education,law=utah

[@Kiki-pr4cy]

Next week a mental health video! Tell me more tips about how to better regulate, or life coaching tips :) I love those videos 💛

[@OhJustCommenting]

Lmaooo he is too old to play lego 😂 I can’t

[@hotdiggity8094]

If you are genuinely looking for more video ideas, I think the huge intersection of Mormonism and Disney adults is pretty interesting. Or a Mormon cryptids part two if you can find any more. Or just like a send us your craziest Mormonism/seminary/youth camp stories and read them. Or whatever you guys end up doing will probably be awesome

[@christopherlands2706]

Nevermo but your content has helped me process my deconstruction from 20 years ago! It’s been so helpful and dare I say….healing….anyway, whatever you decide to do I’m sure it will be great and I enjoy when you do the “book club readings” particularly Sam and Adam because those books were just perfect for read alouds 😊

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Ahhh yay!! ♥️♥️♥️

[@MorganMcMorganstein]

I've been joking about making my next bday party a sort of funeral rehearsal (I.e. I want to lie in a special box & listen to my loved ones eulogise me) and I feel like that would still be 70% less culty and sad than Nelson's celebrations

[@nova_violin]

This is brilliant

[@siddthekid5046]

Oh God, the Eterna...oooOH MY FUCKING GOD is that a corpse?! Good lord, son!! How did he make it to 100?

[@AndImsomelady]

Money. It’s probably pretty easy if someone else takes care of your every need.

[@scottevensen2615]

I used to wear a watch and ctr ring 24/7 when I was a teenager/young adult then one day I was just DONE, have never worn a watch/ring since.

[@virginianielsen3480]

Y’all Holland has got to be trolling Nelson with that weird bandaid speech. “Yeah cute little boy is going on to be a doctor, he’s going to need some band aids to heal people’s boo-boo’s”

[@tonelove666]

I spent some time in one (of many) of the Nelson family’s vacation homes and every picture was a testament to the lack of joy within that family. Celebrating rusty is the only “joy” found there. It’s rusty’s lifelong determination to be praised for his righteousness. The “feeling” present in every corner of that house was creepy and god damnit you better do what rusty says and do it with a smile and with praise for rusty’s name. Eeeeshhh so cringy…

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Whoah

[@AndImsomelady]

@@tonelove666 did feel tempted to be the master of your domain in every room. I would. Or at the very least drink coffee and show my shoulders.

[@deeperthings]

Fun fact: "Happy Birthday To You" is 27 years older than President Nelson. It entered the public domain in 2016, and since then it is okay to sing it in Primary, restaurants, and at 100th birthday celebrations.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Omg

[@schmutzie]

I take magnesium glycinate for eye twitches. The glycinate type is the easiest on your GI tract. I hope it helps!

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

magnesium glycinate has helped my restless legs, but not my eye 😢

[@OnTheBrink_29]

I CANNOT with the mouth noises. You would think a rich ass church could get better microphones 😂

[@КсенияНикольская-х5г]

Tana just stole my heart today!

[@virginianielsen3480]

“Does anyone know a cure for chronic eye twitch” babe it’s called sleep 😅

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

i get a solid 8-9 hours 😭

[@virginianielsen3480]

@@ZelphOntheShelf oh ok well maybe you need to do a blood panel haha? Vegans sometimes need more b12 or maybe you could use more magnesium or less caffeine? I don’t know what all you eat but it’s got to be something causes a deficiency.

[@AndImsomelady]

Someone can make him a cake every day the rest of his life.

[@raydunn8262]

Thank you. During the entire celebration, did anyone mistakely uttered the word, Mormon. If true, it was the work of the Devil and offended Jesus.

[@ashakes4911]

I physically need you to make a video that makes Tanner do his insane laugh again. I am sad not hearing it.

[@AndImsomelady]

Ionized salt such a easy fix, in my life I’ve never seen anyone with a goiter. But these are crazy times and I’m sure there’s probably people out there railing against the iodine industries stronghold on humanity.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Iodine deficiency is more common in vegans, hence the usefulness of iodized salt :)

[@AndImsomelady]

@@ZelphOntheShelfit was also a bigger problem when people ate local food almost exclusively. Some places just don’t have it in the soil. I’m surprised that vegans would struggle with getting enough, before it was added to salt, you got it from your vegetables. Provided it was in your soil.

[@China-Clay]

Yes he is very much older than Wendy, my friend knew her and we got all the low down about their uh, dating, it was so weird

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

!!!!!!?

[@AndImsomelady]

Do tell!!!

[@China-Clay]

@@ZelphOntheShelf can you say “arranged marriage “? Oh wait, that’s the FLDS, no actually it’s also the mainstream church. She was one of the very few that might fit the bill, never married, lived in the area, “friends” got them together, remember how they were preaching that any two good people could make a marriage work? That was the inspiration. Wendy was already a bit public, so I can see that she is good at making it all look happy happy. What 50ish woman wants to live with an 80ish man? For Wendy, it was all strategy. Gross 🤮

[@BunnyWatson-k1w]

She's from Canada.

[@AndImsomelady]

@@BunnyWatson-k1w oh, so she’s just too polite to say No.

[@nova_violin]

Lol’d so much at this

[@aloesecretinc]

Tanner is soo dreamy.

[@darcey55]

Loving the discussion about Blue Zones, Goobie and Doobie, etc. Leaving the church led me to open my mind to more possibilities in life that I never would have considered before. Becoming 💯 plant-based 2.5 years ago has been life changing in ALL the best ways. The only drawback is that eating out can be tricky (but I don’t eat out much).

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

YAY! 🩵

[@AndImsomelady]

I love the world’s best claymation podcast. But y’all are the best. I would watch y’all play Pokémon in park.

[@brookeroadman7607]

The way I saw a post from the chirch about his birthday directly under Alyssa Grenfell's secret lives of mormon wives video yesterday had me ROLLING (lmk of you wanna see the screenshot because I couldn’t help myself lol)

[@kadegainey5123]

That happy birthday arrangement was dope

[@mslaerik66]

Im surprised they didnt buy Him a throne

[@AprilFriday-de6vm]

They have their own birthday song in the manual. They told me it was because you can’t print Happy Birthday To You in the songbook because of copyright

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Omg

[@allisavercool227]

The soft animal of my body loved you guys being so done with it all lol

[@stinkyyucky68]

I'm so glad I'm not in seminary anymore because there is NO WAY I could have sat through a full class period with birthday decorations feat. Rusty. It sounds so scary??

[@kenny-gee]

So bizzar he's in attendance but gives a pre recorded talk

[@kadencherian]

Would love to see you guys do a review on the big love television series!!

[@clydeLedford]

Another good one is Profit\President Kimball described the GA J. Michael Quinn as his "little Lamanite" and much later Elder Qinn admitted he was gay.

[@rebeccacampbell585]

Try potassium for eye twitching. Either eat a banana everyday or take a potassium pill. Most are 99 mg.

[@AndImsomelady]

@@rebeccacampbell585 Or a potato, or orange juice. Both have more potassium than bananas. Don’t fall the big banana propaganda.

[@hanatemonstas4485]

Just started watching but wow. Sam’s top and hairstyle is stellar.

[@frivoulous11]

I live in the Inland Empire, where the Seventh Day Adventists have their stronghold. I learned a fun fact at a party from an ex-Seventh Day Adventist (SDA) that when the Mormons were called back to Utah from San Bernardino (they were among the first groups to colonize California for the US after it was taken from Mexico in the Mexican-American War) they invited the Seventh Day Adventists to come colonize the region in their stead. Now the largest concentration of SDAs are in Loma Linda, a city to the immediate south of San Bernardino. I haven't fact checked this though so take it with a grain of salt.

[@jessegonzales816]

I wish I was born the year duct tape was invented

[@bl3343]

I think I've mentioned this before, but have you guys heard of Texting Through Time with Brigham Young by Christie Monson? I think it could make for an interesting read through for this channel or Patreon.

[@danielmajdali3713]

"The first person to live to a thousands has already been born" Say what, bro? 🤨

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

futurist propaganda 😵‍💫

[@peterhoyt2529]

It was a bit triggering watching Nathan Pacheco (guy singing happy birthday). I became aware of him back around 2010 (because I was on my mission when it happened, haha) after he had toured with Yanni. And then he became the straight David Archuleta for the church. 😅😂

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Ahhhhhh

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

We were wondering who he is!

[@peterhoyt2529]

@@ZelphOntheShelf he’s a great singer. I recommend looking up ‘Yanni Voices Nathan Pacheco’ on KZbin to see some of his non-Mormon music. 😉

[@RyannJoyRule]

TOTALLY NOT CULTY

[@JennaGetsCreative]

Just wanted to reassure you guys, it's not *us* your loyal audience who doesn't want pivoted content, it's the algorithm. I've tried to pivot content too and it doesn't work on this platform. The unfortunate answer is a new channel, which we all know is a lot of hard work, and as soon as your audience starts to look too much like your previous one then the algorithm puts you back in the same niche.

[@xenuburger7924]

Not saying Rusty should try this, but Albert Hofmann tripped on LSD at the age of 95. He died at the age of 102.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

he also was on lsd while he died, which is interesting

[@bgardunia]

Elvish hair days!

[@ScottyOrange]

when did they start doing this? LOL, I don't remember anything like this when I was still a cultist.

[@nixiedoe]

Other in the comments have already said it, but i want to also say I'm sure there are many of us that are interested in content not about Mormonism. As I've gotten further and further away from when I first left the M*rm*n church, I find myself reaching for explicitely ex-mormon content less and less. Its refreshing to see you guys be able to express yourselves about other topics as well, and I personally watch just for your wisdom and humor :)

[@kristenmae6761]

As someone who lives in a blue zone and never knew what it meant, thank you for educating me.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Jealous!!

[@DeMiRoxmysox02]

This whole video is a wild ride! But I also now want to have a “Russell Nelson’s 100th birthday celebration” themed birthday. Where my friends make slideshows of my life. 😂

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

Hahahaha

[@grandmaroxie2210]

Windy was never married before

[@jewelgazer]

Is it true that Mormon prophets cannot marry a woman who has been married before?

[@grandmaroxie2210]

@@jewelgazer I don't know

[@daysofgno]

Yeah, my mom tried to get in touch (I am no contact) on Nelson's birthday.

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

💜💜

[@LaLaJonesG]

I wouldn’t give this man one minute of air time - waste of time and energy.

[@paige2567]

I would love for you guys to do a Mormon Q&A… like I’m so curious about how Mormons approach the Bible/Evangelicals/Catholic beliefs and also the rise of the TV shows (Real Housewives and Lives of Mormon Wives)? Do they like it because of the exposure? Look down on them as fake Mormons, etc.

[@lizbates4531]

Cute little braids, Sam!

[@Maryfs1]

I love your top Sam!

[@Matt_Dillon1]

Maybe we will get lucky and we will simply rot into the Earth and our time on this rock is just a cell splitting and multiplying and shedding the dead cells until we are fully shed and cease to exist at least we get to argue Religion online!

[@krisfisher2329]

Rest in peace Rusty

[@YogiTheBearMan]

?

[@tomhopkins6456]

Love you guys

[@Matt_Dillon1]

I ran from the church at 16 had to see the World and Dammit I saw and it ruined me No re dos

[@ljaderomero]

“Mercy?!” 😂

[@lisaw8619]

I've watched Goobie and Doobie too!

[@paulastorga228]

1:40 wait, wtf is this lol

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

@@paulastorga228 “I saw a striking contrast in the progress of the Indian people today ... they are fast becoming a white and delightsome people.... For years they have been growing delightsome, and they are now becoming white and delightsome, as they were promised.... The children in the home placement program in Utah are often lighter than their brothers and sisters in the hogans on the reservation.” -Prophet Spencer W Kimball, General Conference Report, October, 1960

[@lesliesexcitingnews8984]

The Virgin thing isn't a thing... 😂😂 Born and raised and left the LDS church... But yeah no getting remarried isn't frowned upon. Lived all over the US and literally never heard the Virgin thing

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

We just mean with prophets and apostles!

[@ZelphOntheShelf]

For normal members, men can be sealed to more than one women, but women have to get unsealed from the first spouse if they want to remarry

[@jacobliston7339]

"Apostles have to marry women who have never been married before." Not sure if you were joking or not but this isn't true. Howard Hunter married Inis Stanton in 1990 and according to her obituary, she divorced her first husband in 1966.

[@jonathanfarquhar]

I enjoyed the mormon video 😂. You guys talk a little about social media and media fasts. Maybe about mormon social media because its interesting unless you already talked about it