Mr Inbetween - Before I Went to War

[@craigkenny37]

Ray's little facial movements as he's trying not to tear up are what ruins me, he can't look at his dad because he knows what'll happen. Damn good acting.

[@TheHairlessGibbon]

@@craigkenny37 your not kidding. His acting touches nerves that even thinking about the scene chills my spine. I'm seriously gob smacked at how this program reaches deep inside you on so many different levels.

[@AllForJesusAndMary]

What’ll happen if if looks at him?

[@__unio_]

@@AllForJesusAndMaryhe’ll tear up and cry

[@TexasHavoc64]

It was this rare window of vulnerability that really made me appreciate his character

[@100StepProgram]

It’s some of the most realistic stuff I’ve seen in any show or movie, I’ve been in a similar situation and damn it’s like looking in a mirror

[@stevepetty3458]

“I just wish you knew me before I went to war” , powerful statement. How many returned soldiers feel that on a daily basis.Some wars never end.

[@jacklamb2904]

Yea I got shot in Afghanistan i understand every word and live with this, nice to have it via tv how I feel

[@Badgerman494]

What's interesting is that Ray's current lifestyle, his lack of empathy, his complete ambivalence towards killing, was likely created in part by his father, and in part by his time in the army. When Ray looks away, trying not to cry after his father say "I wish you'd have known me before I went to war," You can see, almost, regret on his face. As if he's evaluating just how much of the man he is today is because of his father callous abuse. Acted to absolute perfection!

[@coier1]

I think that is extra offensive because his dad did have a life before war, he was a person, but Ray didn't get that chance. He was born in war, all he ever knew was violence. Almost like he is rubbing it in.

[@Badgerman494]

@coier1 I don't think he's rubbing it in at all, if he wasn't genuinely regretful I'd agree with you, but he wishes, truly wishes, he'd been a better father

[@hank689.5]

You can tell Ray wants to forgive him but something kept him from telling him how he really feels Great show

[@BigFerg-hf6uv]

Probably one of the greatest shows ever to come out of Australia. Real shame something more in a bigger longer format never eventuated. Ray was an amazing actor . I still hold faith it may be relaunched one day

[@BFCNick]

Nah, it was complete. I know all the best things seem too short, but that's because they don't let themselves run too long. There's only one more story to tell, and none of us want to see it happen. Funnily enough Scott Ryan was a taxi driver right before he became an actor...

[@johnmiller5678]

Best scene of the show

[@classmst89]

​@@BFCNick well said mate

[@bdan4804]

No it finished it was one of the best shows. Wellmania is hilarious one of the funniest shows I've ever seen out of Australia . Also Bluey one of the best and wholesome cartoons I have ever seen in my life.

[@The_Trinity_Effect]

All good things come to an end They left it out imaginations what happened to those two that dared Ray in the Taxi Best ending imo

[@martynroberts6018]

Some actors stand out from others and Ray portrays the character so well and real. A top actor, Australis should be very proud of him!

[@justsomeguy1691]

It’s so crushing what isn’t said in this scene. Ray has so much resentment for his father, but as a veteran himself he can’t help but understand what he’s talking about here.

[@hehnothinpersonalkid5323]

I think it’s even deeper rays shown himself how to be a “man” if his fathers this much of a wreck, ray doesn’t owe him anything. In fact ray is probably a murderous criminal because of what his father did. As a veteran tho there would be a level of mutual respect - I think ray recoils because it sounds like every other dodgy cunt making excuses for why they can’t pay or why they did this - dunno just a thought but your comment made me analyse the scene a bit deport

[@jakelightford3740]

Right ;).......

[@DS-vq4fw]

I try to suggest this show to everyone I know. I think it's a masterpiece, right up there with Breaking Bad, The Sopranos and The Wire.

[@Eliphand]

ending was mid though

[@willembass]

100%

[@michaelthompson8571]

God, he never shuts up about those shows

[@al3440]

Ooo “The Wire” but for Australia

[@biglootums5243]

Ray knows exactly what his father means when he talks about how fighting changed him and it kills him because he is so committed to hating his dad, to see how human and relatable his struggles really are.

[@bb4udig]

One of the best TV series ever.

[@JoshJasinski]

"I just wish you knew me before I went to war" Ah :(

[@tommytigerpants]

That's the crushing part about getting older and having kids, they don't always get the best version of you and the regret you feel is agonising.

[@grimmlight4541]

Such a underated series. The acting is incredible.

[@andsowot]

From a little known TV show, this scene is as relevant to as many as a subject gets. An entire generation fought in that and other wars and came home to Australia, The UK, America, Canada etc unable to cope and without the help to get better. It has affected generations after them.

[@davidgilroy1214]

A few bars of Nick Cave at the end was beautiful. My friends great uncle served in Vietnam as a tunnel rat. Even today his wife gets up early and the poor bugger is sitting in full uniform ready to start his day! War kills, but it injures and damages so many more people. God bless these poor souls!

[@Stephanlabize]

That show is lightning in a bottle. Just fantastic

[@adhi01646]

"I'm not trying to make excuses, I'm just trying to explain what i was going through." Is just so real as a person who's going through shit and done somethings he's regretting every single living moment

[@JeffreySmith7777]

My father served in the Philippines in WW2. Stopped in New Guinea before going there. He showed me some pictures from over there and told me some stories. He was a great father.

[@richardorsulich4698]

This is such an under rated series

[@raytheonorion]

Writing. Acting. Damn well executed.

[@ShaneQuigley-u7v]

The grestest piece of television ever, so subtle but the depth of pain misery and past regrets not for what was , but what could have been is truly heartbreaking

[@marktcards]

if you didn't think that Scott Ryan was a talented writer and actor before watching this scene then think again - He's finished the series but I hope to god it's not the last we see of him on our screens! I've watched this scene many times and it always brings tears to my eyes!

[@nathanstolz4650]

Australian public really treated Vietnam vets very poorly, especially considering a lot of them were conscripts and didn't have a choice about going.

[@silo3com]

Australians were in vietnam?

[@PurpleSmoke1215]

@@silo3comWikipedia: Australia's involvement in the Vietnam War began with a small commitment of 30 military advisors in 1962, and increased over the following decade to a peak of 7,672 Australian personnel following the Menzies Government's April 1965 decision to upgrade its military commitment to South Vietnam's security. From what I heard, Australians were vicious in close combat at the time.

[@george2113]

​@@PurpleSmoke1215there's no way to survive close combat without losing a piece of yourself

[@jamesbumgardner1469]

​@@silo3com wait until you find out South Korean Tiger units outnumbered US personnel by mid 1970. Both The Ozzies and South Koreans were well known for their ferocious fighting spirits. Its a shame their sacrifices aren't more well known.

[@ianmcdonald3053]

No the Media brainwashed the people to hate them, they didnt want the Vets speaking up!

[@barrymchugh5612]

Watching this show right now! My Da passed away when I was 7yrs old so Ill never know what it's like to say "I'll tell my Dad"! Just lil things like that I miss...

[@edvalencia5861]

I know what your saying, my father died when I was 9

[@fujitafunk]

I love how this is just one man's story but tells the story of so many like him with the same issues, that were perpetuated because we didn't know what we know now. (War veterans) It also tells the story of so many father-son relationships that were less than ideal and possibly abusive. The war outside often becomes the war at home. Major respect to all vets but little respect to the governments that throw their own people into the line of fire.

[@carlcastro7998]

The best show I have ever watched

[@bored8715]

With Ray’s acting here and the light comedy here and there throughout the series. This show is the whole package. This was a damn good show 👏👍🤙

[@JW-zs1pz]

My father was in korea as a paratrooper. Im 58 now, i never knew how badly thw war had dinged him so with post effect of being in trench warfere. He would wake up screaming, and i never knew u til i was in my twenties how much that war had messed with his head. This show is outstanding and very well written.

[@Onthecouch-r5r]

The moment ray finally understood his dad and war has fucked them both up mentally.

[@thecableguy007]

One of if not the best show to come out of Australia

[@jediabsolute7897]

This show does not get the credit it deserves. There were so many of these moments where if the dialogue was given to a less talented actor, it wouldn't have had the depth and nuance that Scott Ryan and the rest of the cast delivered. The only problem I had with this show is that we didn't get more of it, but it ended when it needed to and told a perfect story. The fact that Scott Ryan hasn't done any acting since is sad. He is ridiculously talented.

[@SuperEdge67]

This is one of the best shows of all time. I’m going to watch it again for the 3rd time soon.

[@timothymayer3142]

These kind of talks are always hard. I moved my mom into a nursing/palliative care home. I know she doesn't have a lot of time left. Before I flew back home, I meant to talk to her a bit more, but the day didn't work out that way and I didn't get the chance. So when I flew home, I wrote her a letter, telling her that I love her and thanking her for being so loving, patient (she needed it with me), and to tell her thank you for being my mother. I didn't want to miss the chance to say those things and luckily I didn't.

[@droudoesstuff.]

did or didn't

[@timothymayer3142]

@@droudoesstuff. I DIDN'T miss the chance, thankfully

[@droudoesstuff.]

@@timothymayer3142 oh nice happy for ya

[@lonesomeness-w6h]

it's all make believe,. Still I'm crying as this scene takes me back through 80 years of war or nor there was a time when I was a better man. Older people all over the world can share these emotions. Begging forgiveness and understanding...that's all we are to each other

[@tanto001]

one of the most outstanding australian tv series respect to Scott Ryan and Nash Edgerton

[@61wanderer61]

This drama has really showcased some great acting, writing and cinematography.

[@redsol3629]

Nobody comes back from war.

[@yayboy765]

Only the dead

[@fredscherf8266]

War kills not only those who die on the battlefield but those who survive

[@jaydaville1105]

The 1st and last time you see emotion like that from Ray in this series. And he made it worth the wait. I had an abusive family growing up. And even though their gone. I still can't forgive. It affects every aspect of my life. If i wouldnt have had my little girls. I would be dead or back in prison.

[@alexpereira6528]

Like Ray said "thats what people do mate, they hold on to shit" or something to that effect

[@NicolaWaldbauer]

My father never had to serve as a soldier in war. Still when I was a little girl, four years old, my father beat up my then pregnant mother. When I was six years old both parents started to attack and hit me and my baby sister. Physical violence against little girls was a normal part of my childhood. I grew up with a mixture of fear and anger, always going back and forth between people-pleasing and angry rebellion, defending my parents against nosy strangers, but secretly hating them, longing for their love but recoiling from any physical touch. All the times I confronted them they found excuses (they were unhappy, too much alcohol, anger issues), now they are old and blissfully dont remember...

[@industrialathlete6096]

Of ALL the excerpts,THIS is the BEST.Great writing,Great Acting.A 'tear'jerker for sure!!!

[@scottpitner4298]

He legit looks like he’s holding back tears here. Dang this seems like a great show.

[@kimbellard4860]

Scott Ryan is so good in this role that it is easy to forget what a great writer he is. Amazing show.

[@bdan4804]

This is one of the toughest if not the toughest scene in this series. Unfortunately so many people can relate to it in some way including myself. Such a great series everyone should watch it highly recommended❤

[@aaroneckardt5514]

My personal all-time favorite show. The most realistic character. There is no need to suspend disbelief to watch it like all other shows. The realism and truth of the characters melt into you and you see through their eyes and feel their words as if you spoke them. I am a huge fan and wish he had not stopped writing and acting.

[@lamam9058]

Thanks for uploading this clip mate. Got a half drunken Vodka bottle right next to me trying to forgive my old man for the shit from way back when. Similar. Thanks.

[@johnndavis7647]

There comes a time when you realize that your parents just did the best they could. Same as you.

[@scottl9660]

Your kids don’t care what your bag is, you are the parent and they are the child. You did enough or you didn’t, and they decide which bucket you’re in.

[@andreasaa2000]

He beat him and treated his son like shit... "the best they could"

[@johnndavis7647]

@andreasaa2000 he was probably treated the same way.

[@rfan6382]

I've seen 93%of this show now through random KZbin clips jumping around from season to season.

[@devinrodriguez3530]

do yourself the favor and watch its sooo good!

[@steveperez178]

You're gonna wanna watch it before the whole plot is spoiled. It's well worth it.

[@rfan6382]

@steveperez178 thanks the thing is I really struggle with shows I've tried many of them and can't stick to them. Partly because I have to watch on my phone so bite sized clips and films are a shorter commitment and also I have sports teams to follow. Any chance you can mention here why Ray threw that cup of corrosive liquid at another inmate in prison? Unless that would spoil something for anyone else.

[@Nofixdahdress]

@@rfan6382 He was paid to. He's a hitman, hurting people for money is his job.

[@cromp3361]

What a performance from the Rays dad, gets me everytime.

[@ML6103]

Same actor played Chopper's Dad

[@cromp3361]

@ML6103 no way. Yeah, just recognised him now you said it, what a legend.

[@AdamLAD]

The acting in this scene is incredible

[@Eskii_NZL]

The way he portrays a man trying to hold back his emotions is phenomenal. I felt that to the very bone

[@basketcas3717]

Seeing Ray pretty much crack up and cry after all we've seen of him up to this point hits hard. You rarely, if ever, see Ray Show this kind of emotion

[@tomoslewis9656]

That was superb acting.

[@silvermv6]

Most underrated series of all time

[@JacobDaniels63]

One of the greatest acting scenes in Australian history…brilliant

[@1hundredand8]

Absolutely one of the greatest shows of the decade

[@Cletus_the_Elder]

It's fiction, but these types of apologies happen in real life, usually when the perpetrator of the abuse finally gets sober and finds clarity. The problem is that the apology is made to a victim that has grown into adulthood and likely has done some work to get past it. The apology just hangs in the air, because it was the child who was owed the apology. The writer and director gets it.

[@benpotaka5893]

The acting here is exemplary, the characters in the series are right on point 👍🏻

[@charlie19318]

Love this series, ray shoesmith is a legend. This scene and the one where Bruce dies gets me. Could watch this series on repeat! 🙏💪❤️

[@mattmullens3215]

One of the most powerful scenes in Aussie TV history. Not sure if it's a travesty or a blessing that it's so unrecognised.

[@nicholasdickens2801]

It’s no surprise as most people don’t know something classy or intelligently written with imagination and heart if they tripped over it.

[@khoderAhmad-vs1qi]

Very deep scene amazing acting on both parts

[@archieanderson2945]

However that sad reality still lives on in thousands of our Veteran's from yesterday and today. Respect to all the Men, Women and the families of our military for keeping us safe

[@1boreal]

The acting in that close up is astonishing. So many subtle little things. Slight bulge in the eyes, very slight raise in the eyebrows, minor curl of the mouth.

[@brucecormier7929]

Some great acting. The old man and Ray.

[@joskoevoet9569]

Imagine how many dads returned from war this way last year, this year, ...

[@2serveand2protect]

Wow! These are excellent actors.

[@Brian-zv8bz]

Incredible acting and what a series

[@ferbobian]

Incredible scene.

[@monel58]

The only reason Ray came back in the room and sat was for Bruce.

[@njoYYY]

"I wish you would've known me before all that" hits really hard...

[@junah1986]

Best... series... ever.

[@anthonysullivan9858]

Bloody hell. Seeing Ray tear up got to me.

[@JetJockey87]

3:35 there is a single frame of a glint of a tear in his eye. It's so fleeting but it's so powerful. Excellent cinematography.

[@davidmt23]

Wow, what an amazing scene heartbreaking. This show pushes all the emotional buttons, maybe to the extreme but outstanding all the same.

[@Tonystarkes888]

That’s high quality Aussie acting

[@martynissitt2693]

One powerful scene, superb acting

[@DivShadow]

My stepfather, the only father I've ever known, did this same thing. Long story short, i grew up angry, spiteful, bitter because of it. The day he sat me down and apologized, I was 28. His apology was the greatest weight off my shoulders. And all my years of being so angry at him and at the world just melted away. I never thought i had it in me to forgive someone until i forgave him. It was seriously liberating, and all of my own anger issues just disappeared. Anger truly can be a poison. I know not everyone can get that kind of closure, and i feel for those who can't. For those who can, take it and hold it close to you for the rest of your lives. Today, i don't think he has forgiven himself. I have to stop him every time he tries to apologize again, telling him it doesn't matter anymore. How do you stop them from the regrets?

[@mendosa2519]

J'ai 35ans et depuis longtemps j'attendais que ce jour arrive où mon père reconnaisse ses torts à moi et à mon frère, mais ce jour n'est pas encore arrivé. Et je crois qu'il n'arrivera jamais. Cependant une partie de moi a pardonné sans que la demande ne soit prononcée par l'auteur des préjudices, mais ce pardon ne peut être complet et salvateur pour les deux parties puisqu'il n'est effectué que par une seule, c'est donc un demi pardon, ou un pardon dormant qui ne s'est pas fait encore jour. Je compatis également pour ceux qui restent et sont restés sans que le pardon ne viennent remettre une pierre à la place de celle détruite par le mal causé. Le pardon est de remettre une pierre pour reconstruire à nouveau, mais cette pierre doit être portée par toutes les parties concernées, sinon le sentiment d'injustice continue de frapper celui ou celle qu'il l'a porte seul.

[@svenboelling5251]

Well... it really only helps if you realize that you would probably have become the same under comparable circumstances. Only then, I believe, is true forgiveness possible.

[@george2113]

My father became addicted to rage

[@stevemariner5980]

I love this show

[@WillPreston3D]

This scene haunts me, and changed the whole concept of the show. I guess Ray is probably wondering if he'll be old one day, will lose the love of his daughter and regret burrying strippers in the woods, plus what ever the fuck he did in the army, it was enough to make his mate commit suicide The cycle of violence, both domestic and military, and the aftermath

[@26Guenter]

It's never to late to do the right thing. Even if it's just or starts with an apology.

[@TheReapergod36]

There are few scenarios where once you've done them, your life is over.

[@govinda102000]

Big time. I wish my brother talked to his kids. Nothing since they were age 9 and 11 after the divorce and they are in their 30s living a few miles from him. All about money.

[@jpallen719]

Damn….. that was so realistic…. You could feel the pain…. The regret…..a lot of us know much this hurts…….

[@jamesbarker9895]

My next door neighbor was in Nam. His son was my best friend. He had his good days, and there were days he couldn't handle the trauma. Even as a kid I instinctively knew that he was damaged goods and always would be.

[@Bitofsnoo-d4k]

It's not a bad instinct. Broken people make broken homes... *Damn this is a surreal scene... trailing into Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Into my arms... God's Bless. x

[@Mr2at]

That's bloody good acting and a great script.

[@FelineLegion]

how many of us would've loved to meet "the one before"... war or not, life breaks some of us no matter how good we used to be. How could he not be angry being accused all the time after going through hell?

[@NiskaMagnusson]

the acting is absolutely phenominal, had you thinking it's real, even today veterans get shafted where I live in the United Kingdom (although perhaps not quite as much as in the olden days). This series has such a wide range of emotions, you forget it's the same series that has the "pee-pee movies" bit in it lol...

[@Count_Courage]

Good lord I never thought a show like this would have such an emotional philosophy I dropped it before giving it a chance 😢

[@geneharrogate6911]

Geez.. Between Chopper and Ray, this bloke sure has raised some tough nuts..

[@FredMcCubbin]

He’s a comedian by trade

[@matthewcasale1997]

Wish he made another season or two, great show great talent.

[@richardschafer7858]

Such a great show

[@markreynolds2241]

One of the saddest things in my life is not witnessing my dad in his prime. Unfortunately no one can.

[@Ranzoir]

Power scene… I wish we had gotten more from Ryan , his talent and work ethic weren’t discovered until very recently. We could have had many years of this man’s work and performances we missed out on.

[@remowilliamsjr7095]

Life leaves scars that never heal. My heart aches.

[@gaza2times697]

one of the best series ive ever watched

[@Makeithappen1986]

Ray s watery eyes is the rarest sight i ve ever witnessed…

[@bobbarron6969]

This episode is a vivid reminder that more than just Americans paid a price for being in combat in Vietnam.

[@thomashague1577]

Yes I’ve recently got involved with my granddad at the local rsl and how they were treated in Australia is nothing but atrocious, worst thing is my mate was in Iraq and the exact same things happened to them

[@isn0t42]

Ye, the Vietnamese paid. They're still paying.

[@chochtopf8682]

Yeah like... the Vietnamese.

[@bobbarron6969]

@@thomashague1577 My country has never really come to terms with the Vietnam war and it remains a controversial subject.

[@eshatbereitsbegonnen7313]

@@bobbarron6969 What’s your country than?

[@trespire]

The often unrecognized price of sending young men in to combat.

[@mikolowiskamikolowiska4993]

Want to recognize the price of not sending them?

[@ulceratecharlixcx]

This show broke me. I dont even know what to say. Went through all the emotions in such a short span.

[@Spruce_Bringsteen]

It's a shame the industry doesn't further enable people of talent like Scott Ryan.

[@borris3768]

because the industry is built around profit and exploitation

[@pol191919]

Freddy would have sent Ray after Rishi to collect the debt 😂

[@patrickhauraki8713]

Great actor

[@icu8128]

He just wants a little understanding, what every man wants. 😢

[@nadinewestraad3574]

Some men just cant cope Some men "manage" Some men ... well they have nostalgia

[@george2113]

The people who get rich off war, never share with the people who pay the real cost.

[@johnbain7191]

The world is filled with 40-50yr old men who need this kind of apology from their dad.

[@nnaheim.]

Yep.

[@Boss-gd2ij]

It wasnt an apology

[@nicke7350]

@@Boss-gd2ij It was something better; a reason, a solid reason. I'm speaking purely from personal anecdote, but that is what I would have wanted from my dad, just an explanation for why thing turned out the way they did. It wouldn't change what was, it wouldn't magically make things ok, but it would put things into perspective and help me move past it.

[@BaronMorte]

@@Boss-gd2ij Sure was an apology. And a valid explanation. I am a combat veteran and I know what that does to you. And Vietnam was probably one of the worst wars for us to be in, if there is such a thing.

[@safn1949]

Dad was in WW2 in the Pacific, USS Phoenix in some of the worst battles, it showed.

[@JasondenHollander-qj5hp]

Perfect song choice at the end

[@agustinhidalgo405]

Fuck that hits hard, watch this scene many times.