If you don't have a Spiritual Father: Can you still pray by night? Can you use the Jesus Prayer?

What happens if you don't have a spiritual father? Can you still pray by night, can you still practise the Jesus Prayer, the Prayer of the Heart? If so, who is our guide?
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Fr Seraphim Aldea from Mull Monastery - the Orthodox Monastery of All Celtic Saints on the Isle of Mull in Scotland - continues the introduction to Prayer by Night.
In this video, he answers three questions:
- What is the role of a spiritual father in one's life of prayer?
- Can we still attempt such things as nighttime prayer and the Jesus Prayer without a spiritual father?
- If so, who is our guide? Who will teach us how to pray?

[@mullmonastery]

Dear all, our booklet 'Prayer by Night' is now available for pre-sale, at a discounted price, from our Monastery store. Despatch day is October 19th, but purchasing the booklet now will make the entire publishing process much easier for us. Thank you for ALL your questions, comments and suggestions. They help us understand what aspects of night vigil you want us to address in more detail. Here is the link: shop.mullmonastery.com/product/prayer-by-night/

[@Dismas19]

Mull Monastery, thank you, purchasing that as well as the others today. Christ is risen indeed. tenderly, Jens, USA

[@Kee2Oz]

"Success based on pride is worse than failure based on humility." I will remember those words. I have recently found this channel and subscribed right away.

[@Music-Visually]

I recently found this channel too 🙏🙏🙏

[@Music-Visually]

I am at the beginning of my journey. I am discovering Orthodoxy. I suffer often from pride and despondency. Your words, Father, guidance and love in Christ, are so helpful, strength to us all. Christ is the Light of World 🙏🙏🙏

[@NepticChronicles]

These types of videos have become my spiritual guidance in these ungodly modern times. Still will be praying for a spiritual father.

[@mullmonastery]

Keep on praying, dear one. And keep working on yourself - without humility and obedience, God will not send a spiritual father, because having him may become detrimental to us without these two. When we have these two (the seeds of them, for none of us actually has them), God knows that His gift can be received and used for our spiritual benefit. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@danielgaley9676]

Thank you Father for teaching this. I desire a spiritual Father, but my wife is my stumbling block. Thank you for praying for us 🙏

[@christiancelticwarrior1222]

When my crippled body can no longer move and I’ve nothing left to prove, I put my Faith in God above, As daily He showers down His Love , When you can’t look me in the eye, I don’t have to wonder why inside you know I’m telling the truth but I’m getting to long in the tooth, To believe in a world full of lies , one only finds out when you die , That there’s a Holy God above and Christ is the way , truth and love

[@brentgarner3143]

Again everytime I watch and listen I'm challenged corrected and encouraged I'm speechless all that I can say is Lord Jesus Christ Son of God have mercy on me a sinner Glory to the Father Son and Holy Spirit amen

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Brent, all we hope is that these videos will add some value to our spiritual lives - a bit of hope, the courage to get up and start anew after a fall, the desire to be more loving, to not judge anymore and so on. If we all tried our best, even if our best is extremely limited and humble, we would all be so much better and our salvation so much closer. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@sodalish]

A thousand times thank you!

[@deanaburnham9571]

Some of us as myself are so wretched it's not easy to look up off the proverbial floor except to cry out in anguish and repentance thanking God for the comfort of his loving forgiveness, begging him to protect others hearts from my meanness and weakness. My iniquities are ever before me....

[@s.d.berquist6866]

Thank you, Father Seraphim. I needed this. I allowed my despondency because of losing 2 spiritual fathers in a row, (one to death and the other to laicization), to stop me from striving in prayer. For over 2 years I have simply prayed a bit each day, served at church, gone to confession and communion when available (by a visiting priest), and not truly striven in prayer as I used to. I used to pray for hours at night and received grace to continue doing so. I used to be able to fast with joy. I am encouraged by this advice. I WILL stop waiting to find a spiritual father and I WILL ask God, my patron saint, St. Seraphim of Sarov, and the Mother of God to help me to learn how to live a life of humility and repentance. Please pray for me. Thank you!

[@isaacsommers141]

Thank you!

[@mikec6733]

"The dangerous path between despondency and pride." Well said.

[@Pedro_Gala]

This has just come to me at the precise moment I most needed to hear it! THANK YOU GOD! May this brother be blessed through You!

[@mullmonastery]

This brings us great joy, dear Samuel. Thank you for sharing this, it gives us great courage to continue our work. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@mommiek8e]

I don’t know the first thing about finding my spiritual father. I’ve understood the importance for a long time, just not how.

[@mullmonastery]

I don't really know either, dear Kate. In my case, God sent him my way at the very lowest moment of my life. Trust (and pray) that God will send you this gift at the right time, as He does with all His graces. Also, keep in mind that a spiritual father is someone you yourself 'create' by investing someone (your parish priest, your father confessor etc) with the trust of a spiritual child. Be blessed, dear one, be blessed.

[@mayssasamy6368]

Hi, my name is Mayssa, I'm Coptic orthodox, Egyptian. Thank you for all your vedeos. God bless you Father. Pray for me and my family

[@maaikekamstra7353]

Dear lovely Father. The fact that you have this channel, that you speak and share all you're wisdom with us. IS for me The answer that God exist and is guiding us. You are our Spiritual Father, because we are homeless souls who longing and thirsting for TRUTH and real Christianity. I can feel the Holy Fathers breath trough every word you speak. Thank Our Lord and the Holy Tradition of the Orthodox Church. May the Lord bless us with Humility and Obedience coming and flowing from our heart.

[@dallaswolf1387]

You blessed me more than I can comprehend with this teaching. Thank you, thank you, Father.

[@user-eq2uo8ho3e]

From Russia with love and prayer !

[@OrthodoxReview]

Thank God, I was just asking myself these questions this morning!

[@mullmonastery]

Glory be to God, dear one. We have been asked by several people what happens if we do not have a spiritual guide in our lives, which is why recorded this video. Thank you for writing - it helps us and encourages us to keep going forward. May we all be blessed.

[@MazBringsby]

@@mullmonastery Thank you.

[@markuskokkonen122]

I have also been stuck on this question, Thanks!

[@jesusislord7634]

I have personally used several spiritual fathers, nuns, monastics, others thru you tube, and payer. Thank you for your wisdom, and may god continue to bless you! ❤️🙏

[@konstantinosmi.6737]

Another great and really helpful video! Thank you father Seraphim! Greetings from Greece, your blesses! Lots of love!

[@mullmonastery]

My dear Konstantinos, thank you for your kind words. Please keep me and the Monastery in your prayers- you live in such a blessed country, filled with so many holy people. Please ask them to intercede for us, too. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@mgshagirmeso6231]

God bless you, Father

[@jameshutchins3396]

Amen Amen Amen. We just can not trust our own wisdom (pride) and seek love and peace above all. We always have hope. It simply takes time.

[@mullmonastery]

Be blessed, dear one. There is a reason why the Holy Fathers speak of patience with such love - the strength to endure, the strength to wait out one's own weakness, one's own nothingness, this deeply transforms a person and prepares him / her to receive the seeds of the Life to come. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@jameshutchins3396]

@@mullmonastery Amen +++

[@chrisgibson3521]

I watch your channel often and receive great blessing from it. I do wish that you would talk more about spiritual fathers. I am from a Christian tradition that does not have them. Could you suggest specific books for spiritual guidance? In His mercies.

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Chris, thank you for suggesting this and for your very kind words. I confess that I am afraid to talk as about the topic, as I struggle to understand how best to do it. I could only approach it from the point of view of a spiritual son, but that would require that I share even more of my own, personal spiritual life. I shall pray and see. Thank you, dear one, and may we all be blessed.

[@milou22rh]

Father Seraphim, thank you so much for your teachings. They are much needed during this period of my life. May God always bless you with courage, health, spiritual purityand bestow upon you His Holy Grace. All of you, including the sisters, will be in my prayers.

[@bishoyalphonse]

Right on time father, pray for me, a Coptic orthodox.

[@keshapatel8179]

I love how encouraging this was. One question, being a non Christian by birth, those still believing, and not yet having had gone through the sacraments to become Christian, will God still hear my prayer if I do it humbly and persist continuously?

[@philmansfield8825]

In short...yes

[@deanaburnham9571]

May I ask, Why not seek out an Orthodox priest and become a catechumen? You wrote quite a while ago. How are you doing? Will you consider finding an Orthodox church?

[@pilgrimcarolee7294]

Father, Thank you so much for this teaching. It is a confirmation of Something I felt God teaching me since I don't have a spiritual Father. I have blamed my guardian Angel's for not doing their job to keep me from trials. But I needed those trials for my spiritual Growth. I would know This until I would be in the midst of a trial. Now that you have done such a great job teaching this I can refer back to this video. God reward you for your service to me & us Out here who need these teachings you have learned by having A Spiritual father. As I have told you before my spiritual Father has passed on years ago. So I am with out a Spiritual father now out here in the Mohave Desert. St.Mary of the desert Is one of my Saints I Pray to & St.Benedict Joseph Labrea. The rumors that he was mentally I'll are not true. I have a good biography written by his Confessore. It looks like you had a monk film this video For you. Is that true? Does someone get up In the night to film your Teachings for you?

[@jesusislord7634]

Beautifully said.

[@barrycartner3855]

Holding onto prayer as if it were a lifeline is such a beautiful description. Thank you.

[@miriam4091]

Thankyou Fr! That was very meaningful for me and deep.....Look forward to your talks - so full of grace and love. Amen Amen Amen - from Canada

[@mullmonastery]

Thank God for the good He shares through each of us, dear Margaret. We are also grateful for your words and your encouragement, and we thank you for your support and prayers. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@che_guevara67]

just found your channel...thank you for all your doing..please pray for me..totally lapsed catholic here but i miss her very much..the church i mean

[@mullmonastery]

May God bless you, dear one, whoever you are, whatever the pain of your heart may be. We are all 'lapsed' one way or another - we are all the same in our fall. What differentiates between us is our ability to get up and start anew: seventy times seven, day after day. The entire sin of the world is nothing compared to one drop of Christ's Blood. I pray you find the humility and love to let go of your fear and look up to Christ again - it would bring so much joy to Him.

[@che_guevara67]

@@mullmonastery thank you for taking the time to answer....god bless you brother

[@samueljones5421]

Such a blessing this video is, and thank you Fr for making it! God bless you, you pray for me and ill pray for you!

[@irinabojescu7140]

Mulțumim mult, părinte!

[@saso3545]

Bless Father Seraphim. Thank you thank you 🙏🏼 May God help us laymen to help one another through our prayers and the prayers of our Holy Fathers. Glory to God. ✝️🇲🇰

[@annelizification]

Thank you for your assistance Father, it helps to know that the obstacles that trip me up are normal and the suggestions you have given will help me get back to it.

[@JaythePandaren]

I really wish I could pray like the saints can

[@awetodaydomdom7075]

Really like your humility God blessed you. Thank you for explaining the Spiritual Father to us & night prayer. I will buy the book to understand more. I have started to pray at mid night at the beginning of the year, i feel more connected at that time, the house is quiet. Through Saints i have been guided to St Benedit who i have no idea who he was nor knew his existence, Glory to God. I have many troubles with my addicted sons. I know things will not change the next day. God blessed you all.

[@cristinadragaescu1459]

Thank you so much !!!

[@elioftheforest]

Your prayers and blessing dear Father. I enjoy the wool prayer wristlet I recently received. It comes at a rough patch in my spiritual life

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Elijah, I am happy that the prayer rope arrived and that it is helping you pray, but I am sorry to hear that you are going through a difficult time in your spiritual life. May God bless you, dear one; may He give you the strength and the patience to wait out this bad weather - beyond any temptation, there is always a treasure of grace. Be blessed, dear one.

[@seraphim4088]

Fr. That's a beautiful icon of the Theotokos behind you. Will it be made available on the site at some point?

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Seraphim, that is a personal icon, one which we are using as the prototype for our iconostasis at Kilninian. Yes, in the near future we shall make it available from our Monastery online store. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@jwills3242]

Beautiful video. I’d love to learn more how to use the saints to guide us. ❤️

[@mullmonastery]

Thank you for writing, dear one. And thank you for your question - I'll try to think about it and maybe we'll record a video on that topic. The one thing I know for certain regarding the Saints is that they are closer to us than we know, and that their love for us FAR exceeds our love for them. They are already One with God, and so their love has become perfect. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@richardsz9099]

Thank you Father , this is very helpful .

[@mullmonastery]

Glory be to God, dear Richard. We all try to help, but God only can pour life in our words. Please remember me and the Monastery in your prayers, and may we all be blessed.

[@TracyW-me8br]

Not sure if this would help anyone but I know where I live, near New Orleans, Louisiana, a Roman Catholic (I say this because it’s my only experience) can call your Diocese or Archdiocese and they will have a list of people trained to be spiritual directors. You can also ask your parish priest or a religious order priests if you have some near you. It’s helpful to have a priest as a director because you can go to confession, among other reasons, but there are lay spiritual directors too.

[@nancythornton4425]

Thank you for this video. I have been praying night and day for awhile now but feeling like I was missing something. I keep having questions about prayer or getting stuck in certain situations. I realize I need a Spiritual Father. You answered some questions on another video about negativity during prayer. I was horrified by what I saw .... but assumed (how I do not know...?) that I had to push through it. I felt it would eventually leave me if I kept the steady course. Now I know I am driving without understanding this course. I need a Spiritual Father!

[@sunyrodriguez]

Thank you!! Great advice, God bless!! 🙏🏻

[@robinski5031]

Thank you so much for this beautiful message. You are helping me a great deal. God bless and Merry Christmas

[@lindahuelskamp1050]

thank you for sharing, i enjoy it..

[@bebatouloupis9161]

Thank you Father! Your video always help to answer questions I’m struggling with. Stay well 🙏

[@zaxchief3891]

Very nice.. very peaceful explination :)

[@joylarson9040]

I don't have a spiritual father, 😔They are too busy.

[@dovganjuk]

The correct way of say "Ignatius Brianchaninov " is to stress the second "i" , not second "a". You can check robo voice google translate for "Игнатий Брянчанинов" in Russian and hear it. God bless.

[@mullmonastery]

Thank you, dear Evgenii, I'll try to remember that. I'm very used to the common English way of pronouncing it, but I'll definitely try. Be blessed, dear one.

[@carltonpoindexter2034]

I also thank you. I regularly ruin his name but it used to make my former Russian priest laugh.

[@mikec6733]

Is it possible to fulfill my dream of being a wonderful guitarist without falling into pride?

[@mkeenan1955]

Thank you Father for your disquisition on prayer, learning how to pray by praying. You covered a lot of ground. You indirectly answered the underlying question of whether one is READY to have a spiritual father in answering the question whether one can learn how to pray without a spiritual father. In other words, perhaps one not being ready to have a spiritual father is the same as one not deserving of a spiritual father. Am I right in understanding what you are saying?

[@mullmonastery]

My dear Matthew, thank you for writing. I don't really knowhow to answer that questions, because it depends from person to person. In some cases, you are right, not being ready for a spiritual father is the same as not being worthy of one; but in many other cases, not being ready simply means not being able to have one, or not being able (not knowing) how to use him in a way that benefits you, rather than damage you. And again, in some other cases, there simply is no need, because the person is very much a beginner and he / she can perfectly well grow by learning from the people in church or from the books that are available to them. When you say 'not being worthy' something scares me, because it is very close to judgement (even self-judgement) and I know that Judgement belongs to Christ. Keep me and the Monastery in your good heart and prayers, dear one.

[@leoschuman3260]

Dear Father, thank you very much for this teaching. One request , though, is to return to your simple, one camera recordings of your earlier videos. The constant switching between cameras in this video, and focusing out and focusing in, distract from your words.

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Leo, I am so sorry for this. I do everything alone - from the recording to the editing, and I am an absolute beginner. In a strange way, this has become my obedience, so I need to do it as for Christ, to the best of my ability. I can see how working more on editing is helping more people to listen for longer, so I do need to learn more. You are right though, I may have exaggerated in this particular video. I'll try to be more subtle in the future. Thank you for your comment and thank you for your patience. I genuinely am learning with each new video. May we all be blessed.

[@sjsmith9637]

I hope you will speak about these mechanisms of prayer that you have experienced. There isn't nearly enough information on this.

[@volnadr]

Father Seraphim, please tell me where did you get the Icon representing our Lord with St Silouan and St Sophrony?!Did you paint/draw it yourself? It is absolutely amazing!!!It is so representative. Can I buy it from somewhere, I would be immensely grateful!

[@mullmonastery]

Dear one, the original icon is in the Altar of our Chapel, just in front of the Altar Table. Copies of the icon are available from the Monastery online store, but wait a day or two before trying to buy one, because we are just going through the process of updating our security features. May we all be blessed, dear one. shop.mullmonastery.com/product-category/mounted-icons/christ-st-silouan-and-st-sophrony/

[@volnadr]

Mull Monastery Thank you so much! I am truly looking forward to it! I am also interested in a booklet/book( either in English or Romanian) containing the most suitable prayers for night time, is this available in your online store as well?I feel so “attracted” to start this journey even though I feel a bit confused as I don’t have a routine in prayer apart the psalms and some other random prayer( thing which I struggle with even during my morning/evening prayers. For the Grace of God and by the prayers of my dearest Saint, Sophrony of Essex I would like to slightly try to pray by night but I would like to have the most suitable prayers to start with at hand. Thank you very much. Andrei

[@user-pm2gn6ep7r]

I am far from spirituality and night prayers, but still consider myself an orthodox Christian. Our local priest seems no more spiritual than me. I have almost lost my belief that spirituality exists. God hides from us and our sins. Just in rare moments we can dimly see the Sun through heavy clouds of sinful life. I am happy you, father, had different experience.

[@ketzergaw2593]

When i was in my country i used to have spiritual father. now i live in America so its difficult for me. what can i do?

[@sandraburen7389]

Yes you can call on the son of god hewill here you.

[@jonathanmaranatha8796]

Mi spirituel father can it be à saint that is already whit christ? Dead in this Worl? It Will be hard to find a spirituel father...i would love so much....in dont see enyone realy saint has im hopping to felow close to me. Im catholique.

[@carynroxburgh1184]

What is a spiritual Father Is he different to a priest

[@timpeters9965]

Does the video imply that fr Andrew the fr of The Orthodox Church i am a member of may not be my spiritual father? Am I supposed to ask? How does that work?

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Tim, I do not know the relationship between you and your parish priest, so I cannot answer that question. Your parish priest can be your father confessor and your spiritual father, of course. But these may also be different people. Either way, I trust God gives each of us the people we need for our salvation, so don't doubt anything, place your trust in Christ and all will be well. May we all be blessed, dear one.

[@timpeters9965]

After I left question I was able to touch base with fr Andrew and asked him if he was willing to be my spiritual fr and he said consider it done. Thank you very much for your videos. Easy to understand, practical ways to apply to my life all around i look fwd to your instructions.

[@josephmwangingure3259]

How to choose my spiritual father are they saints?

[@deborahbrayton276]

Holy Mother of God Theotokos...

[@andrasun9562]

For some reason I cannot donate via PayPal: it says: "This recipient is currently unable to receive money". Why?

[@mullmonastery]

Dear Yulia, thank you so much for trying to support the Monastery. You are right - for the last two days, we have been working on trying to further increase the security of our website and online shop. By the grace of God, we have never had any issue with our security, but try our absolute best to keep the website as safe as possible. We may exaggerate perhaps, but this is our only source of income and we want to make things safe for you. It may still take a day or two until we finish the update, but we'll notify everyone who has tried to make a payment during this time. Thank you for asking - I am sure this answer will help others, too.

[@andrasun9562]

@@mullmonastery Thank you. I will try again after few days.

[@mullmonastery]

@@andrasun9562 We have finished all our upgrades now, dear Yuliya. Thank you for your patience, dear one.

[@pilgrimcarolee7294]

Father! What is wrong with your throat??? You Made such a "Loud" noise when you drank your liquid!!! I have heard,but very rarely, a Similar noise but not nearly as Loud! Are you Alright?

[@freeman8128]

Jesus taught us how to pray: "Our Father in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as in Heaven "Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses (sins) as we forgive those who trespass (sin) against us. Lead us not into temptation (put us not to the test) but deliver us from evil For thine is the Kingdom, the power and the Glory forever. AMEN." Jesus also told us: "I am the way, the truth and the life, nobody comes to the Father but by me." (John 14.16) Jesus said nothing of the intercession of saints and as Fr Seraphim points out, while a spiritual father would be desirable, such a person is not absolutely necessary for us to reach out to God in humility.

[@stelthtrekker9445]

I get tired of seeing the sorrowful serious face on every thumbnail. Monastery life must be depressing.