My Life: Mental illness and other struggles

Reminder that this is my channel and I decide what is posted. You don't. If you prefer only horse things, don't watch this but please don't tell me that my channel is a horse channel and I shouldn't be discussing stuff like this. My channel is what I choose to make it and I really wanted to talk a bit about this. Watch at your own discretion, but if you choose to then you don't have a right to complain about it. There will be more horse related videos after this, do not fret. Thanks for listening if you do.
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[@HollyLenahanSJ]

You are so strong Shelby, well done for sharing this ❤️ I also so agree with what you said about people needing to really think about what they're saying before the comment something nasty. You don't know what's going on in someone's life and you can't judge someone from a couple of videos or Instagram posts.

[@laurenkimball9098]

The first thing that I noticed is your bomb eyebrowssss😍

[@laurenkimball9098]

Also I love this video so so much and I totally understand I watched it all and I'm always her if you need it!!! ☺❤

[@remismite6551]

Shelby, you are such a strong girl. Thank you so much for sharing this. This proves that no one has a perfect life. Because you have to make it perfect. I'm not going to sit here and complain about my terrible life but I have several mental health disorders and this is so inspirational to me. You are my role model. You are an amazing person. Have a blessed week. ❤️

[@AmandaMBooks]

Thank you so much for sharing this Shelby! I can relate to this in many ways. I had no idea you were bullied in high school, but for what it's worth, if I had seen/known it was happening I would've stepped in and helped you and your friend. Sending lots of love to you and your family, you've all always been so nice to me and I'm so thankful for that. Message me anytime you need ❤️

[@flatjunk6898]

You're very brave for putting this out there and I hope it helped you to film it. I also struggle with depression and anxiety. I WAY over think most everything, imagining thinges are much worse than they actually are, so I commiserate with you. You are so strong and I am proud of you for working so hard and staying in school. One day at a time, for all of us. ☆

[@brittaneyjorgensen6286]

you are a huge inspiration. i related to this video so much. tank you for sharing cause not enough people have the courage to share their story. so thank you

[@barefootbaylie]

Brittaney Jorgensen I agree

[@paigeangelina2939]

Shelby, I cannot thank you enough for talking about your personal struggles to help others. It just goes to show what an amazing and strong person you are! My thoughts are with your family, I'm so sorry you've had to go through so many hardships. It's so unfair that good people like your family had to go through that. You're such a great role model for anyone, equestrian or not. I can't believe how hard you work for everything, it's so inspiring! Again, thank you for just being an amazing person.

[@leslicarlyon6329]

I’m in awe...Few people have this depth of understanding and even fewer are brave enough to talk about it. The fact that you are a fellow equestrian makes this video hit just that much closer to home, it truly resonates within my soul. So many props to you!!

[@maytel.vazquez7220]

I'm not used to write comments but now I really feel the need to do it, I've been in horrible situations like you, struggled with people who've done horrible things to me for no reasons at a hard time of my life. Sometimes, I felt like I was wrong, and that I was the bad person. I didn't want to wake up in the morning and go to school. Now, horses help and teach me everyday. We get stronger and things get better. I admire all what you do for your horses and your family. You deserve great things, thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences, they're very important for people who are struggling or feel like no one understands. Don't pay attention to critics, best of lucks in everything you want🍀💪you'll do it 😊

[@idontevenknow7568]

i have had similar situations. i have anxiety, severe sepression disorder, im bipolar, and more that i wont name. my family is also strugging financially. i am not mentally stable, and have a phsyciatric service dog in training, and have been through over 12 therapists since i was 8, i can not eat in front of people, like you. and i have been betrayed, bullied, told to kill myself, and sexually harassed multiple times. i have attempted a few times and still feel like i am not worth it, i do not feel loved and have lost myself a while ago. and nothing is helping at the moment, and my thoughts somethimes consume me more than anything, i feel like everyone is judging me. at some point, hopefully, i'll get better, even i it's jsust a little bit, thank you for the nes who took their time to read this, i am Aleya, i am 14 years old. and this is my story.

[@sophiegustafsson1925]

You’re so brave! This is such an important video and I feel like many need to realise how usual mental illnesses are❤️

[@cbbrry8919]

Gosh I love Shelby so much. I am really glad you told us this. You are such a role model to me. ❤❤

[@-cutie-xd3003]

Your so strong Shelby! We’re all here for you! We love you 😊💖🤞🏽

[@alisonwilks302]

Lots of love to you and your family. I saw a documentary about the fentanyl crisis in Vancouver and it was heartbreaking. You have helped me after a major loss of confidence riding so thank you and I hope your person in detox makes a recovery . I never suffered with anxiety in my life until my dream of getting a horse came true and it went very wrong , I was lost and heartbroken because I loved her so much but couldn't face riding , I got a crash course in acute anxiety . I'm still not there yet but watching a very confident rider helps me to feel braver xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[@oliviaschaefer8278]

Awww, thanks so much for sharing. We all are supportive of you, and will stand by you no matter what. ❤️

[@sherrielm6259]

I listened all the way to the end Shelby! who knew a "kid" could inspire 53yr old girl lol! keep ur chin up, ur doing just fine, just fine :) Ive been in the arena for 25yrs and my horses r the ones who helped me leave my eating disorder behind! been in recovery for 25yrs!

[@RobinT346]

Thank you for this. I have had issues with depression and anxiety since I was about 7 years old (I'm 32 now) and I think this sort of openness is incredibly helpful. Especially when there is this public image of what mental illness looks like, i think it helps for people to see that you can't tell who suffers from looks or lifestyle. I also have chronic health issues which make horse riding physically challenging as well as financially tough - I currently struggle to pay for one lesson a week, never mind owning my own horse! I worry that people think I'm managing my money and health badly by horse riding, but it makes me happy and helps manage the depression. I am so much worse without it.

[@inlesinlet]

Thank you for sharing

[@cheyennelewis188]

I know this video is older but I just watched this and I really appreciated you opening up. I love watching your videos. I can relate so much. My dad got injured when I was in second grade and nearly died. We were forced to declare bankruptcy due to it because my mom was a stay at home mom and we had no income coming in. It’s really hard going from one lifestyle to another even at such a young age but you learn to live with the new norm. I was able to keep horseback riding through most of my childhood even after my dads accident but when I was about to graduate high school I had to stop due to money problems and I started working. It’s been years since I rode and I miss it dearly. I just had a baby recently but I plan on getting back to riding soon and I’m so excited. Watching your videos gets me excited to get back into doing what I love. I’ve been facing a lot of my mental issues lately and horses have always helped me with them.

[@to-nem-ai]

Thank you for this vid Shelby

[@KMartha22]

I am so sorry you have had to gone through all this at such a young age :( stay strong and beautiful like you are.

[@gabrielamedeiros8565]

I can really relate to ALL of this! Thank you Shelby for sharing 💛

[@williamskinner129]

Hey Shelby! I am coming up to seventy years old. Honestly all these things that are hard for you at the moment will fade as you get older to the point that you will hardly remember them. One way to look at life is that when it's hard that's when you are learning. Our brains are so large and complicated that coming to terms with that complexity will often seem like mental illness. It's a process and as you work through it you will gradually become happier. Some have said that we never solve our problems - we just grow out of them!

[@katieoconnor100]

I've only recent started watching your videos and I love them but now I also have great respect for you, it took serious balls to post this and I applaud you. I have BPD and I recently spent five months in a psychiatric hospital, I'm on a lot of medication but the only thing that really pulled me out of the dark was my horse, indie. Thank you for being real when most people online are so fake.

[@rickieleel.1806]

Thank you for sharing this story. my dad had a stroke when I was young too and it changed everything. I remember grade 3 the exact same thing "the weird feeling" which turned out I was having panic attacks for years. The horses really got me through and still do even though I struggle with depression and anxiety still.

[@kathrynschaller8875]

This just popped into my 'suggested videos' list, and I am so glad I watched it. Not sure how I missed it when you first posted it. You are so strong. I have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder since puberty, and my anxiety manifests in hypochondria and dissociation/depersonalization/derealization. I also have ADHD and depression. Needless to say, it's a daily struggle. You aren't alone, and you're definitely right. It's the silent, invisible disorder. It is so easy to give into societal pressures of not talking about it or pretending that it doesn't exist or that it's a choice. Thank you for using your platform/voice to shed light that we aren't alone.

[@kaiyawelch2459]

Thank you so much for this ❤️ you are so strong and such an amazing role model

[@helenmcinerney1]

Well done Shelby, stay strong ❤️💕

[@re-ridersuzanne]

Hugs!

[@anastasia8673]

I related to this so much and understand somewhat what your going through. I haven't been properly diagnosed with anxiety but this video has pointed that out to me that I should. THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO!!!

[@lillay3]

There's a lot of honesty and truth in this and you're very strong to even film it. Horses help me cope with stress and it's really nice to see how much it helps you!

[@kitkatkamo2100]

I wanna give you a big hug

[@lizk12]

I really connected with this video my dad move to British Columbia two years ago and I live here in Ontario and it’s hard it’s stressful and I totally understand how you feel keep up the good fight Shelby I love your videos and thanks for sharing these intimate details of your life with us

[@vilmaarce2066]

Thank you for sharing! You are really brave!

[@emmiejames3913]

I have had big problems recently with anxiety but my family won't/doesn't believe me. It's nice to know when your not alone :) love ya

[@queenofhearts5151]

I almost didn't ride today and watched this video and ended up going. Thank you. So much. Just thank you. You are so beautiful.

[@RachelMTaylor2]

My Dad battled chronic depression while I was in middle & high school, he's in a good place now but I didn't realize how much it impacted my own life emotionally until years down the road. It helps so much to talk about it! Thank you for sharing 💕

[@angxluh]

I have GAD, depression, and everything else that comes with it. I'd really really really love and be honored to talk with you. I hope you will consider it. xx Angela

[@lizzc2125]

I have Sensory Processing Disorder or SPD it's basically bad anxiety I can relate to pretty much relate to everything you were saying about yourself in this video, It's hard going through so much anxiety at such a young age. You are such an inspiration though! I'm glad you are doing better. 😘

[@FreefallerXX]

Liz Piie Really? I have SPD too. I've never ever met anyone, online or in real life, who has this too.

[@charleshills1408]

Ive had the privilege most of my life to have financial support, until a couple years ago when my mom lost her job. She got a new job not two weeks ago, and my father has a job, but we struggled with money, and I still work at the barn to support my family. I understand how it is to struggle with money, I hope you get better

[@jessicafaticanti4579]

So glad you felt comfortable opening up to us! I wanted to know more about you since watching your channel. Stay strong hon! :D

[@richardcruz1325]

You are very kind to share such personal stuff and offer to help others in need. You have a great channel and I always enjoy your videos. Please keep them coming.

[@lunafae6473]

You're amazing! I just started watching your channel last week. I can relate to this so much, you have no idea. Personally, I watch your videos not just for the horses but YOU too. You're not alone!

[@laurenstead250]

Thank you for sharing this. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. And it's so hard to explain to someone when you're having a panic attack because unless they've experienced it they just don't understand and they kind of just look at you like you're over playing it but it really isn't something you can control at all, you just learn to manage it.

[@rivkahphillips7807]

This is amazing. I have OCD and PTSD. It's hard to come out and share with people. Go you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@annaharry2765]

you can do this shelby

[@algypsy17]

You are a wonderful person, very courageous, beautiful and an excellent rider. I wish you so much happiness and success for the future ! This video made me subscribe to your channel ... even so it's a few weeks now that I watch your horse videos, so you can tell THIS made the difference. And when you have those "down" moments there are your horse and cat. Animals can give us so much love and hope and strength :-) !!!

[@equiicobz8883]

My parents split up when I was 10 last year .I also have autism and depression. I know where you are coming from

[@dariabon8601]

You are so strong for sharing this. Thank you

[@kierajorgensen2056]

Thank you so much for being so vulnerable and sharing this with us. I too struggle with Generalized Anxiety, Depression, and OCD. It really isn't rational when you are trying to get through it. I also love that you shared this because I think there is a lot of people who are so hard on thereselves because on social media they only see the good and forget that other people are normal. And I think this can cause a lot of anxiety when you are comparing yourself to only the pieces of peoples lives instead of the whole. But really we shouldn't compare ourselves to each other because we all go through things. So again thank you for sharing and reminding us that we are all human.

[@sue-jd5bo]

you're amazing.

[@chloe-vanessasmith9046]

❤ I relate so hard, especially with the financial side and anxiety. Gosh darn it I'm going to cry ❤

[@magstpwk]

I've dealt with anxiety and depression since elementary school. It definitely impacts my riding a good amount of the time. Thank you for being so open and sharing your experiences in order to help others ❤️❤️ you are a beautiful human, Shelby.

[@taeyahsaechao9747]

Omg, even when you were young your eyes are gorgeous. I love you so much Shelby and I'm so glad that you shared this with us. You're so strong and beautiful!

[@racheldcosta8497]

Thank you for sharing your story. Sending lots of love!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Hope it gets better.🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@rubyward1402]

i get it... i have anxiety and depression too and I know how hard it is, some days i cant even shower because of my anxiety (obviously theres other things aswell). well done for sharing this, i know its hard :)

[@equestrianstyle5090]

Shelby anytime you want to hang out or talk please meaage me ❤️❤️❤️ This video made me cry because its exactly what i have been foing theough since middle school . School was the worst experience for me amd I know anxiety is horrible ! The only thing that really help me be human every day was horses and riding ! Life is a challenge and tour are extended brave and strong your a boss lady ! I can ever see any weakness in you i love your personality and commitment. Love you 💕💕

[@kathleenrimmer5006]

I have watched this whole video till the end and let me tell you that your such a awesome and positive person! If you ever have a bad day you can always go live and i will ALWAYS lessen! I can so relate to you with your dad! My dad had a surgery on his brain for a tumor when I was young and left his whole left side paralised! It took him a long time to come out of it and it was a very scary time for me because I was only 1 and I was always scared to see him because he had these machines ( I probably thought they were monsters) hooked up to him! Till this day we still havent really recovered from the money loss and stress and feelings! I tend to always bottle my feelings up and get angry very easily! The thing is nobody ever understands me and it feels like I'm all alone sometimes in a crazy world full of people that just want to jump and disown me! I want to thank you so much for sharing this because i know now that I'm not alone and that their is other people in this world that have been through the same thing as i have! I also have been bullied and i have really never recovered now I'm so scared to be myself i tend to always show the side of me that people want to see! And im so tired of that! Thanks so much for posting this video agan! I always love to watch your videos they really brighten my day including Milo i think hes just the cutest horse and he has the best personality y'all were meant for each other!💟💟 lots of love hope you read all of this really would apprechiate it! Also I have dreamed of owning a horse but with money problems I never could and couldnt really ride but once I get me a job I'm going to start up soon hopefully and thats becausw YOU INSPIRED ME your my biggest I inspiration ! Cant wait to see another video from you💟💟

[@myequineaddiction9515]

Thank you so much for this video I feel like I have nobody who really understands what I go through

[@suzv8375]

You're great Shelby! Always looking out for people, and making sure they feel supported ❤️ you are using your platforms in such an influential way it's wonderful ❤️ keep doing what you are doing Shelby, I'm sure your words have helped others struggling atm ❤️

[@louis1071]

Be Happy~~

[@KTRN80]

You are such an inspiration and such a brave person to put your story out there. I know people who deal with anxiety, and I see how it affects their lives. You are amazing to stay so strong and still going to school, and working and loving horses as much as you do. Its incredible what you have done with Milo, your rescue story with him was incredible. Thank you for all that you do!

[@stephanglim7192]

Thanks a lot Shelby for sharing this video, it's really hard sometimes when you yourself are dealing with mental illnesses and it seems like everyone is dealing with everything easily and then you feel super alone struggling with mental illnesses and problems at home etc. You are a massive inspiration Shelby, your determination and hard work are why you are admired and inspire so many people, the way you are using your platform to try to help others feel supported and to spread positivity is amazing.

[@pielovermydoggrace]

This is a huge reason for you to be my favorite equestrian. You're honest and well deserving of everything you have, you've worked for it. You aren't afraid to open up to us, and create a personal relationship with your followers. I can relate to your struggles with anxiety and depression, they seem to just piggyback on eachother. Every riding lesson I'm near vomiting due to fear from irrational thinking- can't even count how many times I've canceled despite enjoying myself. Much love Shelby, it'll all pay off eventually.

[@scrider8464]

What courage! Not only what you have lived thru, but to state this. Most people want to project an image and bury, or try to, all the matters they see as negative. Anxiety? And you rode and did shows? Amazing, b/c that is an area of anxiety; another being, a horse, and always different crowds, smells, sounds to make horse freak or freak some. And then there is your anxiety from what you can't control totally. And still you persist! I'd say you can be proud.

[@Milestone-Equestrian]

Thank you, and I agree because it makes people feel alone when they see all of these people on social media pretending to have perfect lives.

[@ashleighdevaney]

The ending was so sweet 😭

[@alanap7239]

You’re amazing

[@ingridhk4285]

Thank you so much for sharing this. I can relate to the mental illness part so well... You are such an amazing and strong human being, remember that ❤️

[@awuma]

Thank you so much for your video. You have bravely and eloquently revealed aspects of life most people don't want to think about, yet which deeply affect so many of us. As always, what you have to say is very well thought out, concise and structured, with an underlying passion your calm demeanour actually emphasises. Who says youth cannot be wise?

[@djteeb1]

You are SO strong! Keep going! Know that we love you and support you! 💗

[@EBhorserider]

I love how real you are. Hopefully you get passed you anxiety and depression soon, sorry not sure how to word that. Your amazing

[@mustbesilent282]

Maybe not many will, but I really appreciate you putting this out. It is so amazing seeing you do well with Milo and all of the other horses you ride, but I think it makes it even more impressive knowing where you came from and what you've come through and are still working with ❤️

[@RyanPerryRealtor]

big hugs to you, chica.

[@mphorsemanship4737]

Thank you for sharing this video❤I also struggle with many of the things you said. I hope you know how brave you are to be telling everyone a piece of you life. (And I seriously thought I was crazy for always thinking people are talking about me in the hallways or thinking they are staring while I'm eating😅😂)

[@ellaelfenchanted]

thank you for sharing :) made my day knowing you are not alone

[@lizziemurphy6610]

I understand exactly what you went through and probably still going through, I suffer with depression and severe anxiety, horses have helped me in ways that no medication and therapy could.

[@horselover55255]

You are such a beautiful soul. I relate to you on so many levels

[@ameliareynolds7410]

This is so inspirational, thank you!! Great job for sharing this!

[@jp8649]

I adore you. You're a strong little lady. I relate to this a lot and it's nice to see someone who is still pursueing their passion despite the obsticals in their way.

[@Smokieridgesporthorses]

Thank you for making this. I've been following you for a while and your one of my favorite KZbinrs and Instagram accounts. People need to be more open with this type of stuff, because let's face it. A lot of us struggle with it. I do. And if we come together we can support each other and make it more bearable. So thank you for opening up ❤️

[@hannawalter9626]

Thank you for sharing your story! Mental health is something everyone has to deal with but rarely is talked about.

[@pheenobarbidoll2016]

I can't believe your mom didn't just eat you up with that adorable curly baby hair. You were one cute as hell little baby. My grandson has curly hair and I just want to bite his cheeks everytime I see him. I think most all babies are sweet, but curly haired babies just kill my heart.

[@delilahredbull2792]

This is very relevant. I have gone threw most of and or all of these things you've said. And I think everyone and anyone should l know about these things. Thanks for the amazing vid it's nice to know someone goes threw the same things I go threw and went threw. :)

[@emmabanbury7928]

Appreciate this so much.... 😌❤️

[@alicetaylor1156]

This is amazing shelby♥ you are so inspirational to those people who have what you have!!!

[@bigbang4ever98]

Thank you for sharing your story Shelby. I relate a lot to what you've gone through re: mental illness. I suffer from anxiety and depression too, so I totally understand how horrible and debilitating it can be. I won't get into my life story and all but I think the fact that you came out and made this video is really brave, I know it can be hard to talk about. I won't ramble on and on but thank you for this, it's nice to know me and others aren't alone. You're a huge inspiration to me already and this just amplifies that. You're incredible Shelby, I really mean that. Also, it sounds like you live near Vancouver; I have no idea how you and your family do it. I wanted to move down there (and still do incredibly badly) but it's just so unbelievably expensive, like I have no idea how anybody can afford to live there, my god.

[@stormmary1]

💓

[@thereseandersson3432]

♡♡♡

[@heyitsmorgan9096]

Shelby you inspire me so much Lol like its unbelievable how much you inspire me to do

[@annaaroundhere]

Thanks for sharing! Your story is definitely relatable to A LOT of people. I saw you at TBird this year and I really wanted to say hi but didn't because of my anxiety.

[@rachelweygand4245]

I never comment on anything but this is very inspirational. I feel the exact same about social situations where I’m paranoid that people are talking about me or laughing at me when they’re not. I couldn’t eat lunch in the cafeteria either because I thought people were judging me. My father was physically and verbally abusive and my parents got a divorce when I was in 7th - 8th grade, which left me with depression, anxiety, and anger management problems. Me, my mom, and sisters were homeless one summer because we were kicked out of our house, we had to give our horses away and everything. I’ve worked my butt off to get where I am today and it’s obvious you have too. This video truly spoke to my heart. Even though we’re about the same age, you inspire me so much. Thank you for putting this video out there🖤

[@ashleighdevaney]

I feel the same way, I always think people are talking bad about me or don't like me, I'm convinced it's true! Even if I have never spoke to them begore

[@isobeledwards2784]

Money is tight in my family so horse riding is super hard to be able to have as a hobby since it’s fucking expensive asf

[@EquallyEquine]

Shelby you are so important and I appreciate you so much.

[@ashleighdevaney]

Love you thank you

[@carae8592]

I watched the whole thing and I don't know if this helps but your amazing and strong

[@eventingxdreams]

You are so strong to put this out hear. I have anxiety after something bad that happened to me when I was younger so hearing this I can relate and seeing how strong you are and how you are capable of overcoming things gives me hope so thank you❤️

[@Equestrian-sb7hq]

Your awesome Shelby!

[@dvsmum3832]

This was very rave Shelby! You're not alone, but horses are the best therapy ❤️ I've been dealing with the ups and downs of mental illness for 20 years now but there is far less stigma attached these days. No ones life is perfect, keep smiling and living each day to the fullest xo

[@dvsmum3832]

Brave*

[@maddybates2692]

you just gained a sub♥️