my miscarriage story [trigger warning]

[@MoxyVerve]

Please don’t let strangers on the internet make you feel less then. You are a remarkably strong women!

[@adamschannel8685]

Than*

[@s.elh.3281]

7:40 to me, you didn't come judgemental on your video about your mom at all. You are right, as a child or teenager, it could not be expected from you to be ready to reconnect with her *immediately* every time she came around (via Facebook etc). That's understandable. I am sorry about your mom, sorry for her and also sorry for you. I wish you all the best and please stay clean at any cost.

[@GATOBROADCAST]

I too went through a difficult childhood but I’m not as articulate as you have been. You are a great story teller and provide a positive voice for those of us who simply don’t have the words. Thank you for sharing such difficult things. Please know what you are trying actually helps some us get through unspoken difficulties. Wishing you strength and patience. :)

[@Velvetfish2]

I wish more ppl were as truthful as you! Pls don’t let the negativers get to you- At least let the positivers hold your heart and attention-

[@pattykochenower4222]

That person that said about wait until you have kids.. that person was never in your shoes… she had no right to say that to you . Good for you for calling them out ! You’re such an articulate speaker and you have a really great way of speaking to us where we feel like you’re talking to a friend . You’re so sweet !! Sending you a big hug and love !! ❤️❤️❤️🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛🎃🎃

[@shaz8486]

You’re a strong woman Jenna, you have had a horrendously difficult childhood, and I can completely understand why you were never in a space to meet up with your biological mum, and that’s ok. She made choices that affected you. It would have been at least comforting to know that she did love you, as she had your pictures everywhere, it’s just very sad she wasn’t truthful to those around her. I am so glad you are in a better place now, and I am so sorry you had a miscarriage, it’s heartbreaking to loose a baby you so desperately wanted. We lost our son when he was 18, it’s just devastating no matter how old they are. I am happy for you that your miscarriage was different as in the baby hadn’t been forming so it made it easier for you to cope, as devastating as it was. If you choose to no longer want to have a child now, that’s fine, it’s your choice your body, and raising a child is difficult as it is, but if you are unable to cope, at least for now, then it’s probably best not to. Our son screamed with reflux for the first 4 years of his life and never used to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time for the first 2-3 years. Somehow I coped, I used to pace the floor, hubby would take over when he got home, so we had dinner in shifts. It was a very trying time, but amazingly I never lost my cool or got angry, even being extremely sleep deprived lol, the poor baby couldn’t help that he had such severe reflux. Later if you decide you might like children you could always apodt or Forster a child that’s a little older, your life experiences would be very helpful to many children without loving parents. But whatever you decide, it’s fine, no one gets to pressure you into anything. I am so happy you now have your life on track, are happy with your new boyfriend and your kitty. That’s a family of love in itself. Keep being you Jenna, you have matured and grown very very strong through your life experiences, which will serve you well through the ups and downs that life is. PLEASE IGNORE haters, there are so many nasty trolls these days that feel they can judge others from behind a keyboard! 😡 You Jenna, are an inspiration to many !!! ❤ Stay positive, safe, healthy and happy, and I look forward to your next video.❤ Love from Australia ❤ 😘

[@Sarah-rp1kt]

Beautiful and loving and wise response! Thank you for sharing your own heart!

[@shaz8486]

@@Sarah-rp1kt thank you ❤️

[@Chilupiano]

Keep us updated. You’ve been thru so much. I’ve seen all your vids. Come back to us now and then. Listening to you is like listening to an old friend and what they’ve been thru. Take care.

[@ritabarnes2440]

Unhappy people make mean comments. Sorry for them but don’t let them get you down. I am so sorry you went through all this.

[@peytonweb]

Thank you for sharing this! I don't have any mental health diagnoses, because I don't have health insurance, but I too hate repetitive noises of certain kinds. I cannot STAND the sound of a crying baby, it makes me angry too! My cat however, can't make a sound that isn't cute, lol. I can't imagine being tied to caring for a baby 24/7...cannot even imagine. So I've decided "no kids" as well. I'm also older now, so I wouldn't do it anyway. But I'm so sorry you had to experience your miscarriage. I can't imagine the pain of that at the time, & the frustration & disappointment. But now we have our sweet furry babies that are much easier to care for! I love my kitties so much, & they love me back. I'm so glad you are in a healthy, happy place now. It gives a lot of hope to those who aren't ❤❤❤

[@karenlim7135]

Sweetheart oh my goodness please PLEASE have someone screen your comments. Oh baby you have been through enough and you DO NOT NEED TO APOLOGIZE TO ANYONE FOR ANYTHING!!! God bless you.

[@tonyaboggs5367]

I've never been through a miscarriage but my sister has been and I remember it broke her so much. The day that she started picking up baby books and shopping for clothes is the same day that she started bleeding. She has three beautiful kids now though she was able to get pregnant after that with no problem. But it was so hard and still to this day it is hard for her to talk about

[@Sarah-rp1kt]

The miscarriage and infertility journey is so painful, and one I have shared with you. My husband is also very OCD with the intrusive thoughts are something we deal with yet I’m the one who has more anger and trauma issues. Somehow, 24 years ahead of you in the journey now, I have had 5 children. Totally respect your choices and can’t begin to ever judge your heart. Only wish for you eternal joy & believe you are a beautiful daughter of God on an eternal journey whatever you decide. My faith and NDE fascination has me look at everything a little differently. But I absolutely love your caring heart and vulnerability you share here. Whatever you decide, you have light and goodness to give this world and you already have just by making it through all the darkness of your past better and kinder. Kudos to your overcoming substance abuse and breaking those chains! You’re my hero for that and your positive perspective of moving through the sh!

[@caseysmith6352]

Just found your channel. Im sending you a giant hug sweet girl. Its not fair life is so hard for the kindest souls. You are never alone and always have people rooting for you, never forget that!

[@bridgettescott7196]

I’m sorry the video has to be on such a hard topic but I truly adore you and could listen to you talk all day.. I’m so sorry for all the trauma you have had to endure because you are such a beautiful soul 💜

[@mirahalperin6718]

Well done in the way you responded to that person that wrote that comment. You handled it so well. With dignity and maturity and inner strength. You're awesome!

[@doron.9185]

It is astonishing how well reflected and positive you are with so many hard things that have happened to you at your young age. Also your authenticity is really attractive! God bless you so much! Doro from Germany

[@anavictoria7688]

I mean you are being honest, its better to prevent it than having a child and maybe not having the best reaction and leave an emotional scar to the child or even worst.. So congrats. Bless. Now I heard your story... And let me tell you hou see like you would be a really good mom. I suffered a miscarriage too..only had one week.. Im sorry about your lost. Just keep doing you, maybe one day you may want to try again.. But if you dont its ok too as I said above! Much love❤

[@lindamcdermott2646]

You are just the strongest,warmest, warrior funny person I’ve met in a long time. You are just so real. Love you so much. We are not responsible for the actions of other people. Your birth mom was a very flawed person and some women are not made to be responsible for another person. But You are beautiful inside and out. Always take care of yourself!! You come 1st 💐Hugs Hugs Hugs ❤ I am sorry for your miscarriage 💔

[@Arman-ch5vi]

Dont let losers on internet make you feel bad. Im so glad your uploading, i like alot of otherd here respect you for being so real

[@carolinaalvarez1985]

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭34‬:‭18

[@jennareaver]

I am glad you find comfort in religion, but I do not. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable and I would genuinely prefer not to have people pray for me or cite the bible for me

[@thetruthhurts9220]

@@jennareaverYou’re insufferable lmao

[@DestineyAmerie]

Hello. Nice to see you uploaded. I just came from your other video and I’m so sorry. I send virtual hugs and prayers your way❤ stay strong

[@picosmom8698]

Jenna, I hope you are doing ok. I too struggle with anxiety and depression so not seeing you post again makes me wonder. Know you don’t always have to have a great story to share to post. Evan a just “hey, here’s a little update” good or bad, people care 💕😉

[@El_C99]

That cats dope 😆 but hope you have a great week! Cool video

[@iamlittlebear]

I'm sorry this had happened to you. When it happened to me I was 26.. and half way( 4 plus months pregnant) it was a girl. I same thing started bleeding my levels dropped her heart had stopped no reason given . And as we looked at the moniter with her still inside of me before they sent me up for D&C. I knew she would of been my only pregnancy. I'm 37 now..no kids. Keep trying if you want them .. I didn't I gave upand shut down. Sending much love

[@plannergirljones2551]

I had children way Into my 40s

[@cynergy7985]

Jenna, you are an inspiration to many people! Your soothing voice and the way you tell stories is incredibly helpful! I just wanted to say, my middle daughter went through 3 devastating miscarriages that took her years to address & heal from. She is a very strong lady like yourself. She now has a 1 year old miracle baby boy and he came along at the perfect time after she healed herself. Keep focusing on you and your life will find its path!😊😊

[@kyliewatson1150]

I’m so sorry 😢 please keep uploading ❤

[@heatherk5567]

I hope to see you again soon. I don't know why people chose to be mean. I am sure they are hurting in their own way but it doesn't give an excuse. Hang in there girl Hugs

[@garyreese6799]

I am proud of you using this platform to heal and grow. God bless you.

[@thereviewracoon]

I really appreciate your stories and hearing you talk. You have a very nice voice, I wish the best for you and the people in your life!

[@roseofsharon.6192]

Dearest Jenna i love your honesty and your a beautiful young Lady ! Its ok to not want children its a massive responsibility so just enjoy life and God bless sweet precious YOU ❤️: ) XX

[@genevievegreene1595]

I just found your channel yesterday, watched all three of your videos and subscribed. It is a pleasant surprise to see you again so soon. Much love.❤

[@haley831]

I also have that anger with repetitive type noises, but I can say, it doesn’t apply with my baby. He makes all kinds of noises that would annoy me if it were someone else, but thankfully he is an exemption

[@terrisparks311]

Keep these updates coming - most of us care enough to listen to you.

[@AndersmitLizenz]

Hey! I also had a misscarriage once... the really hurtfull thing ist that from the moment you get to know you are pregnant on, you HAVE a baby. You imagine a whole live and if you get past 12 weeks thats a lot of time to imagine your live with the baby. I had the same thing where no fetus developes but the placenta does, you perhaps gave birth to a placenta. Love to you❤

[@JenniferLKersten]

I started your video depressed and sad searching miscarriage videos but your great story telling cheered me up. You are so cool ! Id love to listen to more videos from you❤

[@best._.vibess]

I just discovered your channel. You're very strong person with a good heart. Wishing you lots of health and endless happiness in your life❤Greetings from a Bulgarian🌻🧡

[@jmm639]

Woo hoo nice to hear from you! Im really sorry for your loss.

[@005Amergin]

Wishing you healing , love and hope dear Jenna. You are such a lovely person. You are strong and you are here for a special reason. Jedi hugs to you! 💜🙏🏼🇨🇦🥀🍀

[@Sarah-rp1kt]

As for your mom, you are NEVER responsible for anyone else’s choices. Your own safety emotionally, physically and spiritually is always paramount and everything your biological mom chose to do, including suicide put you in jeopardy and you did the exactly right thing by putting up boundaries of protection. That you can see her compassionately now in some ways while perhaps still on your journey of forgiveness is exactly as it should be and don’t feel bad if it takes a lifetime. Where you are today speaks volumes about the goodness you are trying to be and fill your life with, including wanting children to be safe. No one has a right to judge who has not walked in your shoes, and from what you have shared, I glimpse a person who is trying to love safely when the journey has not always been safe or loving. You’re a pioneer paving your own path and I admire you for the light you share to show others a way through.

[@silviavazquez1120]

God bless you Jenna

[@Joefest99]

The negative comments are typically people that see themselves in the bad behavior of those they are pretending to defend. They’re not defending your mother, they’re defending themselves. It’s a selfish act of narcissism.

[@daniellesjerven6593]

My sorry 😢 that you went through a miscarriage. I have never 👎 had a miscarriage so I don’t know 🤷‍♀️ what it’s like 👍 but I sympathize with you and what you are going through. I agree ☝️ some people are just mean 😢 for no good 👍 reason, and are jealous and rude. They want to tear you down to make themselves feel better ❤️‍🩹 I’m sure you know that, but it never 👎 hurts to be reminded. Your video about your moms suicide was sad. You didn’t disrespect your mom. You were honest about your experience with her. Sadly she was mentally ill. You didn’t deserve the neglect you experienced by her. You didn’t deserve the trauma she caused. You didn’t deserve her committing suicide on your Birthday 🥳. If you don’t want to have kids, that’s ok. Motherhood is not for everyone. No judgment just love ❤️

[@MariaGolay]

No one has the right to judge you. I watched your video about your mom. I don't think you said 1 negative thing. I have always wanted children. It took us many years and 3 miscarriages to finally have them. I have 3. My youngest is now 20. You do not have to explain to anyone why you don't want them. I think you are being very responsible by not having them.

[@catic6587]

Big hug! 😊❤Thank you for sharing. I watched the video about your biological mom a couple of days ago and since then I follow you. I hope you will post more in the future.

[@travelngranny]

Don’t let those comments from those few people on the Internet get to you. All you have to say to yourself when you get something like that is considered the source. You’re a young, beautiful, mature woman you’re entitled to speak your mind and like you said you did not say anything negative about mom. You just mentioned your experiences and you have every right to have closed the door , listening to your moms and raving because she was just trying to reel you back and to you manipulate you and CU you did very well. You did good for yourself. You stood up for yourself and you have parents that love you and support you and all your decisions that you made regarding mom. I just came across your channel today and I’m just amazed. What a wonderful amazing woman you are. I’m not gonna judge your mom because she was going through her own personal demons and things and she dealt with them the best way she felt that she could I’m sure she loved you her own way and her own capacity. You just keep doing the great work that you’re doing and enjoy your young married life and grow old with your husband together and just be happy and just know that a lot of people care about you.❤❤

[@nl212ep]

All of your reflecting is really good for you! And you have inspired me to do the same. I really admire your courage.❤

[@nataliagonzalez4473]

As I’m finishing your video….it sounds to me like you had a blighted ovum. I had that. Basically your body starts to form some parts like a water bag but no baby. I didn’t have all the symptoms of a normal pregnancy. I had 2 children before this and a stillborn at 20 weeks along so I was familiar with pregnancy symptoms. There was no throwing up, some nausea but that’s about it. I also missed my period. I took a test and it was positive. I was 8 weeks along and I started spotting. I got scared so my husband rushed me to the er. They did an internal ultrasound and seen the water bag but no baby. They said that is why I never had morning sickness. I had a blighted ovum. I had to go home and let nature take its course. I was devastated!!! I cried and cried! Then later that night I had tremendous pain…like contractions! Very heavy, almost hemorrhaging bleeding started and I knew what was happening. And exactly what you described…a big flesh/bloody/ giant clot like thing passes in the toilet. I knew there was no baby so I just let it be and s continued to bleed a bit. The pain passed and I put a pad on and went to bed. The next day I called my ob and they had me come in. Did another ultrasound to make sure I passed everything. If I didn’t they would have to do a d&c. I passed everything and was sent home to heal. I’m high risk anyways with all my pregnancies. So that’s my story! I’m so sorry this happened to you! I am so glad you are strong! You do what you want and need for you! Don’t let anyone else judge you! Also…what you had is still considered a miscarriage! So don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! I had 2 more beautiful daughters after this! My youngest is 8. I love being a mom but it’s not for everyone! It does definitely get hard! Again you do what’s best for you! Can’t wait to see your next video!

[@nataliagonzalez4473]

Don’t be sorry for how you feel! Don’t ever be sorry for your emotions! They are valid! They are real! People can be jerks! They don’t understand you or how you feel! That is their issue….not yours! You are beautiful and have a beautiful soul! You do you! You know what’s best for you!

[@Lmd977]

That’s called misaphonia!!’ I totally understand that😅 & was shocked when I found out it was a thing!!! I thought it was something I got from my dad bc he used to do the same thing, it may be through hereditary …. A lot of those disorders can be passed down 🙏🏼🫶🏼 In sounds like effects of trauma you’re still healing from ❤

[@alexandrohdez3982]

Every experience make you strong, you are a great story teller, I hope you can make more videos, it does have to be about bad things, you have the talent to speak whatevery you want and help a lot of people. Hope you are doing great, big hug to you. Regards 🙏🌻

[@tinaandtheworld]

Don't dwell on the opinions of others. Each of us makes decisions influenced by our unique circumstances. As you rightly pointed out, her choices were hers, and yours are yours. Many are quick to judge with hindsight, but your perspective is shaped by your experiences and challenges, which others may not fully grasp. Even if situations seem similar, they're never identical, and outcomes can vary greatly. Focus on living your life and finding happiness on your own terms."

[@wandasteiner8908]

Hi Jenna! I'm so glad I'v met you today. You are so enjoyable to listen to. Thanks for sharing, and look forward to your next video!

[@katetomlinson1638]

I had one live birth and 6 miscarriages, miscarriages the further along hurt worse obviously, I’ve only had one at 10 weeks but it was exactly the same as contractions when I was giving birth to my son, my early miscarriages 5-6 weeks the rest were, I had cramps as you would a period!

[@Rebecca-rb8gm]

Always remember your worth it big love and hugs ❤ good luck with your future mate

[@sandradelanney9576]

Makes sense to me why your reluctant to havr kids. Girl as a baby you were left alone they always say you revert back to the age you were first abused esp. severly like you were. Do you I'm here for you. Glad you have your husband.

[@lylongnyiayi9219]

Hi your videos are great... Make your videos and lets us enjoy this moment.... God be with you and have an long life of videos and health.. have an great day

[@anthonygallegos4342]

I know a lot of people who don’t have kids. Kids are beautiful too,just some can do it some can’t .

[@Lmd977]

I’m so sorry that happened to you, I can’t understand why they didn’t ck you @ the hospital w/ a vaginal ultrasound. usually done if if they can’t find the heart beat, it was done to me . Sometimes when we try to make our own plans …. God has a way of letting us know we’re not in charge!😘

[@xxxthwagdrakexxx4672]

Subbed mad respect for you i hope life has been easier for you since

[@psychicsara]

I had a miscarriage too before I had my two boys. Yes the pain you felt is contraction pain. Also, I had my miscarriage in my nonnas toilet. :(

[@billieWood-k3v]

I would take u for my daughter. U are so brave and real. And a heCK of another stronger than u think 😊❤

[@plannergirljones2551]

I have the same thing as you the baby screaming never bothered me I think only once I put earphone in but my husband snoring I imagine all the way I could kill him it’s completely different when it’s your own baby I also had a son born with gastrointestinal outside and he’s a professional footballer now loves having no belly button I also have strong intrusive thoughts that shock me sometimes but in 50 years never acted some of my mental health issues actually resolved because of the love and joy my children gave me

[@sandradelanney9576]

Do you bc you only know what is best for you. I pray you still have a good relstionship w/ your dad. Thank God he intervined. Soul search it does wonders bc only you can answer why you are who you have become.

[@donnamyer9810]

Jenna you have been through so much and are so strong. I am sorry you had a miscarriage. I had three of them. Maybe this is just not the right time for you to have a baby. I pray that you'll make the right choice though

[@jennareaver]

The right choice for me is no babies!

[@inCarsoNatedFPV]

You’d make a great Mommy. You’re a brave young lady. Good bless you.

[@Karolina-le9yj]

Huh?

[@ditchcomfort]

You’re definitely a very strong woman 👌🏻

[@melissalee333]

Thank you for sharing your stories.

[@TheNewMailLady]

Omg you have Misophonia!! I do too and if you have any questions I have TONS of information on it. Nose whistling is the absolute WORST

[@gregorysheridan2015]

Greetings from philly also a east coaster. My current situationship also went through some absolutely mind blowing trauma like you and has dealt with some infertility issues and we have been off and on attempting to have a baby. Seeing how dark it is from a womans perspective is very enlightening. Thank you for sharing.

[@georgespencer3973]

The title of that person’s comment could have been "Judgmental Person Accuses Another of Being Judgy"

[@angelaspicer5784]

your a beautiful young lady your not a lone in miscarriage

[@IndianOutlaw1870]

You never seem to age.

[@tonyaboggs5367]

Thank you for sharing your amazing please keep telling stories or at least making KZbin videos I haven't been invested you are fun and so smart

[@idraculaa]

Oo, new video!

[@jessicaolivo2181]

My mom committed suicide 2 days prior to my birthday...we can talk

[@winkyrinzatti471]

Hello beautiful stay well and take care and be happy .

[@lisabradyusa]

You don’t have to explain yourself about not being ready to see your mom. Her using your birthday as a reason to poison herself was a very selfish act, like now you have to process that, it was wicked covertly f.cked up, and not your fault.

[@she5139]

Its not my place but I think your dr may have misjudged your case bc if you were trying for a year, then considered infertile, then finally got pregnant, wouldnt that be considered a high risk pregnancy?

[@jennareaver]

Not necessarily

[@AP-by6dp]

Ew whistling nose would get under my skin too, don't feel bad about your reaction

[@cr8114]

how can we believe you..?

[@jennareaver]

You are under no obligation to believe anything on the internet. I’m just telling my story. Dunno why you wouldn’t believe a pretty simple story about someone’s miscarriage though lol

[@feliciaboston6365]

Did they seriously send you home after knowing there was not a heart beat ?

[@jennareaver]

There was nothing they could do, they said if I didn’t pass it on my own, I could come back to help remove anything left over

[@naveensharmaI]

I thought cute people had no problems in their life

[@jennareaver]

What people look like doesn’t really dictate what happens in their life lol

[@lisabradyusa]

May I ask if your ex got his sperm count checked? You two could have been a mismatch, genetically. It’s not your fault!

[@missychan63]

Oh sweetie, I have so much I want to say but I'm literally on my way out the door so I will just say this- PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE EDIT THIS VIDEO! It's against federal law to take someone else's medication and it's against federal law for them to share it with you... That's all I'm going to say. ❤❤❤

[@missychan63]

Settle down folks... I'm not judging her. I just don't want to see her in trouble, it kind of sounds like she's had enough BS in her life and probably doesn't need a fresh dose right now. You do what you have to do in the moment and I will never judge anyone for that but I will certainly help keep them out of jail.

[@jennareaver]

@@missychan63this was many years ago, I’m not worried about it. This was just part of my life at the time. It’s also illegal to do recreational drugs, which I’ve mentioned in my other videos before. These are all no longer things that I do but is an important part of my story! I appreciate you looking out, though.

[@ritabarnes2440]

@@missychan63she can’t get in trouble for this! My gosh the law has bigger problems than this. Totally unnecessary to even say this to her.