My PMDD Diary (Part 1) | My Journey With PMDD & Anorexia Recovery

[@deyanira008]

Hey Caz. I want to say many things but I just don't know how to words then because I am always afraid to say something that might offend or hurt OR make you feel uncomfortable but I'll do my best to say that ..... I am gutted to hear how PMDD really efforts your mood to the point where you feel like you deserve to D*. In someways I understand the pain of feeling low and depressed and feel like you don't deserve this life but I know I won't completely understand how difficult it is in your experience (doing daily things, decision making and being around people...etc) when your menstrual cycle comes as it should for a woman. Sorry, what I'm trying to get at is that you are a wonderful person, you do deserve to live, you are not deserving of pain and suffering, and I do hear you that it is out of your control(it's valid), I wish I could take away these difficult experiences. I know you've already posted the second part but I do hope things are okay, I hope you feel like you do count even when you go through periods like this. Uugh I'm sorry if this is soppy and that you don't actually know me...but I just want to send you some appreciation, lending you my ear (listening..), a virtual hug, and maybe a way to express emotions like this.. to us for support (like a bunching bag) and I can just listen and help you through (DM if that's better). But..yea....thank you for well... speaking your truth or what was going through your mind at the moment. 💜 🩶

[@harmonyhope1709]

I can totally relate to everything you're saying about how you are affected

[@cazlovescakes]

I’m really sorry to hear this because it’s such an awful thing to experience x

[@ldaniel5177]

Sending you lots of love and hugs x

[@cazlovescakes]

Thank you x

[@harmonyhope1709]

SOOO. Pleased to see this notification. It's very, very relevant to me!!! It's not talked about enough in my opinion. I also believe I suffer from PMDD. It's going to be so interesting watching your progress through the your treatment for it. Have also considered going on the mini pill amitriptyline which is what my gp has suggested

[@cazlovescakes]

Part two, which isn’t as long and discusses the effects having the implant has made, should be out next Tuesday. I felt putting them both out in the same week would just be too heavy as this is very different to my usual content. I’m still a bit hesitant about my decision to make it public as I want my channel to be entertaining, and provide escapism, but I also feel this is an important thing to talk about and I hope that it may help someone (though it seems a bit arrogant to say that) x

[@harmonyhope1709]

@@cazlovescakes excellent. Look forward to next week's video to!!!! I can understand why you're nervous to put it out there, but that's what I think makes your channel really interesting. The same type of videos all the time gets boring on other KZbin challenges. I think you have a good balance between fun and entertaining and serious and helpful videos, like this one,for others who struggle with their mental health

[@cazlovescakes]

I know I may lose subscribers because of posting this, and I’m not exactly popular as it is, but I suspect there are many women out there struggling with it who don’t even know it exists. I haven’t spoken to a GP about it, but Part Two is much more positive than this video x

[@harmonyhope1709]

@@cazlovescakes I honestly don't think you'll lose subscribers

[@harmonyhope1709]

Really wish I could take this away from you, hearing your distress is so upsetting because you're do lovely and don't deserve to feel like this I know there's no point in telling you you're not fat or ugly or useless because you won't believe it when your head is bombarding you so much. Sending you so much love. Really hope you can get the implant soon and that it helps you xxx sending you so much love ❤️❤️❤️

[@cazlovescakes]

I actually already have the implant - I wanted to be able to release part two of this video fairly soon after part one, so that meant waiting until I’d filmed both parts x

[@harmonyhope1709]

@@cazlovescakes ah ok that makes sense

[@harmonyhope1709]

I literally have to war friends and family it's my time of the month. As you say, it must be hard to be my friend around this time!!

[@harmonyhope1709]

Strange what you say about the decision making thing. I'm. the same. I just cannot make decisions about anything when it's the time of the month. Also the increase in the urges to binge snd the low self-esteem

[@elliebelly2294]

Just wondering if you go out to work or work from home and how you balance/manage that, especially in regards to energy/motivation levels? Thanks for sharing and being so vulnerable, can’t be easy

[@cazlovescakes]

It’s been very difficult deciding to make this video public, but o hope it may help someone else in some way (arrogant as that sounds). I don’t currently work, but for most of my working life, I was either on the combined pill or had the implant. This meant that things were much more manageable. When I came off contraception, I deteriorated quite quickly, and ended up being unable to work. I can’t say whether this would have still been the case if I didn’t also have an eating disorder, but looking back, I can see that a lot of the paranoia, self doubt and feelings of being bad at my job stemmed from the PMDD.

[@elliebelly2294]

@@cazlovescakes definitely not arrogant! The more people are open and honest the more these kind of topics are normalised! I’ve been on some form of hormonal contraception for around 20 years- at this point I’m happy with the one I’m on but will be too scared to ever come off it as I have no idea what sort of person will be unleashed 😂. Fortunately I don’t want kids so I’m happy to do this long term 😆

[@cazlovescakes]

I’m so glad you’ve found something which works for you x