MY STORY #2- THE SAD TRUTH ABOUT ADOPTION

[@divinitymcknees1156]

Every adoption begins with brokenness. Powerful statement Sis. Look at where he is now. Him being with you as compared to him growing in the system. You made the right choice Mel.

[@melgutierrez]

🤍🤍🥺 absolutely!!! Thank you.

[@sugakookie_rand]

“Every adoption begins with brokenness” as an adoptee myself, this is so true. As much as I love my mom and my family and I would chose to be adopted by them again in a heartbeat, you are separating a child from their family or what they know, regardless. And thats a harsh reality to face. Thank you for making this, it’s truly such a great video to show people before they adopt so they can truly understand their child better and know what to expect 💜

[@stephannykannapell366]

Im adopted to and i agree so much!!

[@frankfernandez9648]

Love it

[@songha6338]

넘 울어서 눈이 퉁퉁부었어요ㅠㅠ 몇 번 영상에서 언급하신 적은 있었지만, 이렇게 자세한 풀 스토리는 첨이네요. 작은 몸으로 어려운 상황들을 겪어야만 했던 줄리안의 그 고통이 고스란히 느껴졌고, 그런 줄리안을 보고 힘들었을 멜의 가족과 특히 어린 루카의 다친 맘이 안쓰러웠어요. 성인도 받아 들이기 힘들 반복된 이별과 하루 아침에 말도 전혀 통하지 않는 타국에서의 생활 .. 그 모든 것을 이겨낸 줄리안이 정말 자랑스럽고 고마와요ㅠㅠ 결국 줄리안이 평생 가족을 만나기 위한 어쩔 수 없는 수양가족과의 이별이었음을 훗날 줄리안도 알게 될 것이고 그 상처를 씻을 수 있는 날이 꼭 올거예요! 멜의 가족안에서의 사랑으로 이미 많은 부분이 치유 되었을거예요~ 음식에 대한 자세도 이미 바뀐 것만 보아도 알 수 있구요! 고아와 과부를 돌보시는 주님께서 특별히 줄리안의 가족에게 더 큰 축복을 내리실 거예요~ 정말 총명하고 사랑스러운 줄리안은 랜선 가족들 모두의 보물이자 자랑입니다!

[@michellerbn]

This is exactly why People love you, Mel. You are REAL. You share the hard things and don’t let social media paint a perfect picture. You also show people that when things get hard, you can trust yourself and god that you WILL and CAN get through it. Not only on adoption, but in so many other life happenings. You’re honestly one of the strongest people I know. Forever proud of you for sharing your story! 🤍

[@melgutierrez]

I love you so much, friend🤍🤍🤍

[@nelljackson6464]

I know exactly what you mean. My mom went through the same thing with me when I was adopted. I was only around 14 months and my mom used to say that I would have night terrors. She would just hold me until I stopped. She told me that it was bc she wanted to show me that she was going to be there no matter what. The adoption process is more than just waiting and signing the papers, it’s a life long journey that grows into something amazing❤️

[@melgutierrez]

Thank you for sharing, friend! I’m so happy to hear how much your mom loves you! It is definitely a life long journey and I’m so thankful I get to be a part of it. 🤍

[@traceymorris7300]

Its obvious to anyone that you are doing a fab job. Julian is such a happy little boy.

[@melgutierrez]

Thank you Tracey🤍🤍

[@쥬아-z1v]

멜..줄리안을 입양하고 루카와 모두가 힘들었을 생각하니 그 마음이 왠지 느껴져서 마음이 아프면서도 그시기를 잘견뎌 내고 잘지내는것에 대해 감사해요 저라면 포기할까란 생각도 했을거에요 저는 멜가족이 항상 행복하길 바래요 늘 당신의가족이 건강하고 행복하길 기도할게요

[@idk-xx8dc]

혹시 무슨 내용인지 조금만 적어주실수있나요? ㅠㅠ

[@쥬아-z1v]

@@idk-xx8dc 저도 댓글찾아보니 줄리안을 처음 입양했을때 힘들었던이야기 루카도 많이 힘들어했고 엄마도 밀어내고 거부했다등등 일상생활 이야기 하셨다고 하시네요

[@쥬아-z1v]

@@이름-o9g-z4y 오~~~~무민님 정말 감사해요 최고최고

[@qhstlr77]

@@이름-o9g-z4y 무민님 감사합니다 ~♡

[@이즈야놀자]

@@이름-o9g-z4y 감사합니다 ! 읽는 내내 먹먹함을 달랠길이 없네요 ..

[@thewebbfamily6091]

The rejection is absolutely gut wrenching! The rejection of the parents, but even more so the rejection of siblings! Walking through it currently for the 3rd time!😭😭😭💔💔💔

[@melgutierrez]

I feel this 🥺 I’m sorry mama. But you know how it goes, so keep pushing!!! Redemption is coming 🤍

[@goodhuman3991]

Thank you for doing what y’all are doing. both sarah & mel.,you’re amazing.♥️

[@jovs8639]

Julian is also blessed to have you as his parents 😇🙏 Grateful for people like you, Mel. For such having a golden heart ♥

[@joylee7274]

This mom has full of love in her heart. No one should adopt a child without love and responsibility till the end. I've heard about many stories of abuse on adopted children.

[@coffeebean_]

As a 28 year old adoptee who was adopted from Taiwan at the age of 3... I'm so glad you made this video. A lot of the time our voices (adoptees) tend to go unheard amongst those who tell us we should just be grateful. Adoption CAN be beautiful if done properly I believe. Acknowledging your sons pain and validating his loss is a tremendous thing. The wound will be there forever as it is a separation but as long as your son knows he doesn't have to go through the turmoil alone and that he is allowed to feel the way he does, it alleviates a huge burden on the adoptees shoulders. Along with adoptive parents educating themselves on how adoption is actually a trauma and should be treated as such it can really make a huge difference. Thank you for doing the work. ❤

[@JoseeShin]

Every night I pray for Julian's happy life with Mel, Luca. Always love from Korea.🇰🇷 동유나 따랑해 ㅠㅠㅠ 정말 많은 이모삼촌누나형할무니할아부지들이 사랑한다는 걸, 줄리안동윤이 존재 자체가 많은 사람에게 큰 축복이란 사실을 알아주길 💓

[@Dan5819]

I wish paperwork didn't take so long so these children could be adopted sooner rather than waiting months. Maybe it would be easier to do before they become toddlers. I love that you prayed so hard for help. That is what makes the difference. We love you all so much, too, Mel!

[@lisab.1559]

My first 2 adopted kiddos were between 2-3 years old and in my experience it was way harder of an adjustment into our family for them. My next 2 adopted kids were almost 5 and almost 9 and they came home, adjusted fast. We are now in process to adopt a 7 year old and expect a similar fast transition as toddlers imho grieve hard as they dont understand what is happening. Our older kids coming home were super excited to have a family, knew what was happening, were prepared well and it made for a very easy adjustment for them. So, for us older kids now are our top choice to adopt. They require so little to transition in and are super excited to have a family. My older adoptive kids are hitting now pre-teen age and they are so well adjusted and every year just gets better.

[@lilystar5037]

Sadly there's a lot of risk where some evil families adopt just to exploit and abuse adopted children and for the government financial support, that's why paperwork takes a long time just to be safe and I wish for all the orphans to find good families like Mel's

[@SELENADEMIKAT2221]

@@lisab.1559 as an adoptee at 14 I believe people think older kids have an “easier” transition but they’re hiding their feelings. .I don’t know, I struggled a lot. Still do to this day (21) especially because I feel as though I owe my life to my adopted mother and now tht Im 21 I feel like yea I’m 21 years old in my body but only 8 years old with my family. I am the longest person I’ve known in my life.

[@lisab.1559]

@@SELENADEMIKAT2221 As an adoptee myself, my kids are precious, just as I am to my parents. It saddens me to hear your struggles, just know you are so important and valued and imho, you don't owe anyone anything. It would break my heart for my kids to ever feel that way, though all my kids matter, whether from my heart or my blood, each is my child. Far as their transition, in our home we spend hours a day talking to our children. My 2nd oldest is a Pastor and teacher...he is 22 and fulltime is here as their teacher, their brother and along side me, we speak life into each of our kids. Our home is not an adult home, this home is for KIDS.....people that come here are a bit surprised as every part of this house is taken over. We built a home and made all of it for one purpose, our children. My kids are encouraged to be babied, to be kids for as long as they want. 🙂 Afterall, they missed so much of their childhood and it's my job to make sure they don't miss anymore and plus, I am 48 and I still love being a kid at times! Our family personally feels being childlike is a bonus as we will never ge boring, but instead fun. My Hubby and I fully believe indoor trampolines, swings and game rooms as an example are important so many of our rooms here are just for my kids and us adults too to have fun. 😁 Our backyard too is the same.....trampoline, huge pool, climbing dome, massive Rainbow playgym, balance beam, see saw plane, observation deck, sandbox, etc. Again, everything here is FOR the kids and BECAUSE of the kids. And from my perspective, I believe I owe my kids EVERYTHING, because they gave me the honor to be their Mama!!!! And in all honesty, once they come home I respect them enough to let them choose me too, as I want them to have a choice in the matter. So, in a way, on their timetable they get to decide if I am THEIR family too! As a foster parent and adoptive Mama too, I have only been rejected one time by a child and that's ok too, the rest took one look at me and said yes....so yes one chose not to be my child and ended up in another family that was right for her. Did I take offense to that, no, not at all. As I always say, I am not every child's Mama, just the ones who want me to be. I got to choose my Hubby, and adoption can feel like an arranged marriage, but my kids DO have a say. Even if my kids wanted to stay here but never wanted to call me Mom, they have a devoted Mom regardless, but still they have a choice. My kids are not property of mine but I always say to them...I am your Mama and am here for you, always...because it's a privilege, not a right to be their Mom. And yes, they will have tons of feelings and they have the right to express every feeling, whether it be rage,anger, sadness, anything they feel is ok to speak out loud because their lives were turned upside down and I know personally how that feels. So, while they will battle their emotions, feelings of worth, all of these feelings of sadness about the whys, the hows of their story, its MY and Hubbys and even big brothers as well, all our job to help them navigate whatever they struggle with, we choose to be their family. My oldest adult children have chosen too each of their youngest siblings and are fiercely loyal to them,so much in fact our oldest sons want us to buy land so they can be next door to us. As they always tell me, they want to adopt too and get married, but they refuse to be far from their most cherished younger siblings.. if you read this far, just know every person in this world deserves love, devotion and loyalty...its our honor to have these kids, for better or worse....we will be here.

[@maryamoubax2931]

@@lisab.1559 the best story I'd ever see may God bless you

[@nicholeeukan4718]

I am so in awe of how perfect the Lord’s plans are. Its so crazy to know that truly, there are people for us. Whether be it friends, significant other or even children. The lord has people for each and everyone of us. even a thousand miles away, years away etc.

[@melgutierrez]

So true!!!🤍🤍

[@lizbethfloressalgado7920]

Amen 🙏

[@woodzallrounder6067]

You’re making me cry... thank you for writing this comment

[@lizziexdidi5129]

Thank you for not only talking about this but also talking about your Mental Health, don’t forget that we love you❤️.

[@Angie-zw8mo]

And look at him now 😔✨ you’re his mommy he loves you and respect you so much you are everything to him now 😔💞

[@신희원-w2l]

Adoption starts with brokenness. I never realized it, also most of ppl I guess. Your new video is so honest and make people think more seriously about adoption. And your journey makes my night happy (its about 11PM in Kor). Exchanging love between you and Julian, Luca and Julian are truly heartwarming. Always Growing. Love you so much, Mel. ❤️😍 I really love your new series. Btw Young Julian is SOOO CUTE.

[@elliani530]

i’m 17 and always couldn’t wait for motherhood, I have a genetic disorder that can make it challenging for me to have children. You videos give me hope and happiness and I can’t wait to be a mom. My parents were divorced from a young age and it was definitely the best option for them. Thank you for sharing we love you and your family!💓💓

[@monicakd3828]

ive been following since the beginning of julians adoption, and realized how far youve went until now is just incredibly heart touching. And i know God's heard your prayer that night and working right away cause he will never leave His child fights the battle alone. keep strong mel, please be happy ❤

[@챠밍-s5h]

I never thought of adoption in this way. All I see was happiness with new family in others' videos on youtube. It was good to know the reality of adoption and I am so proud of you and your family overcame those hard times. Thanks for your effort, I can see how happy Julian is with family! I am sure Julian feels the most comfort when he is with you 😍 Thanks for sharing your experience 👏🏻👏🏻I will always support your family :) lots of love and hugs from South Korea

[@svveetpea]

You should write a children’s book about your experience to try and help kids who might be in a similar spot relate

[@GraceyV]

Thank you for being so honest and really share what adoption truly means- the shock and the trauma that it bring to a child before everything is beautiful and loving. It helped me personally to understand and pray for each child waiting to be adopted and who have been adopted too.

[@joyybrn2011]

I understand what you feel Mel, I worked with young children for 17 years, I have seen and experienced children crying their hearts out in their first day of the nursery, the worst part was children under 2 years old who can’t talk and express themselves, especially when they can’t understand your language (English is our language but most of our children in the nursery are different nationalities, Indians, Arabic, Russians, Chinese and yes I have one Korean) but of course we try to understand young children so we, I have intensive talk to parents in my class what to expect when they leave their child, I also make sure is the child’s basic need and what basic words could comfort them. Because imagine an adult going to unfamiliar place we felt lonely and depressed so what about this little children who will be drop by in an unfamiliar place surrounded by strangers? Of course they will run away from you, but that’s only the first phase because when the child get use to you and feel that your intention is not to hurt them but give them love and care they slowly open up to you. I think you did a great job Mel it’s your first time adopting so it’s understandable. But you know I never have regret in this career, taking care of little children is just fulfilling, I get to know how each child is unique and how I developed my career to help and understand and teach and guide them in their formative years, that’s why I love as well parents who put they trust to us as the second parents of that little ones!

[@Lulu-uq8sz]

Couldn‘t it be a thing to spend time with the forster mom and the future parents? You are such a beautiful mom, thanks for sharing!

[@abbiegibbs5924]

I started watching your videos right around the time you adopted Julian, and it's been so great watching him grow up and feel comfortable in your family. The strength of your faith has always inspired me, Mel.

[@keekue4100]

Your story and feelings about your beautiful little boy Julian is the most amazing thing to hear. I couldn’t stop listening until you finish. I was tearing listening to your story about the past and today. He is going to be great and loving. He’s lucky to have you as his mom who’s so patient and caring for him

[@umaru-chan5527]

oh man im tearing up it’s hard to hold back the tears, you all have came a long way and you are such a great mother for holding on during those hard times

[@roseharvey2664]

Julian had such a lovely foster family who he had bonded with so well, they were also heartbroken. The good thing is he was truly loved before he became your son. It meant he was able to form close bonds, even though it was obviously awful for him to have to leave his foster family. It's so hard as you never know what situation your children are living in and how desperately important it is for them to get their new family. The situation with luca sounds so sad too. But you have put in the hard work and it has been worth it. He is an amazing boy for sure. I hope he meets his foster family in the future, they actually gave him a good grounding in his life, it is hard for a small child to be moved around, who knows what even happened before his foster family.

[@pepperpan794]

When you said that Julian laid his head on you (12:13), all I could think of was "Mommy, let's be broken together and heal together." Thanks for sharing this story. It's something I honestly never given thought to. I'm sure there are a lot more struggles you and your family will go through but your boys are lucky because they've got such a strong momma. We're all cheering for you, Mel 💕 Thanks for showing us that kindness IS strength 💕

[@amywestbeld9968]

Enjoyed watching this! I was 10 months old when I joined my adoptive family from Seoul, South Korea. I have been in America for 37 years now (it will be 38 years on October 28, 2021).

[@carmenh2168]

Wow Mel, thank you so much for shedding light on your experience and allowing us to see the bad that comes with the good. I honestly teared up hearing you describe your wailing and praying and right after, Julian allowed you to at least comfort him. God definitely works in beautiful mysterious ways!! It is very true so many sort of lose sight of how much adoption can affect the child and they focus on the excitement they are feeling to be receiving a new blessing. You are so strong and patient and God definitely walked right by you and guided you. I’m so glad that you and Julian have a beautiful affectionate relationship today. My 8 month old son is so affectionate and clingy to me and it’s the absolute best feeling to see that smile the first moment he sees me of the day. May God keep blessing you and your family Mel❤️🙏🏻✨

[@kungfuclub]

Very powerful story and thank you for being so honest as people tend to forget adoption does start with brokenness. Joonie is defo a little mummy's boy now, you were meant to be his mum 💜

[@johnnyls5984]

Unlike many youtubers you don't mind showing your ups and downs, that makes this channel even more beautiful. God bless you 💜

[@leannbrower3152]

Thank you for your honesty. It’s refreshing to hear someone speak the truth.

[@SonyaSun]

Thank you Mel for sharing your story. This isn't to take away from it, but as a Korean adoptee myself, please know that not every adoption starts with brokenness or sadness. My adoption did not begin with brokenness along with many others. Many adoptees (myself included) do not/did not necessarily experience pain or loss (which I do credit that to being adopted before I was six months) in the beginning. What you guys went through at first was truly heartbreaking. But every adoption and adoptee is different. While everyone is entitled to their own opinions, adoption should not be seen as sad or broken. Adoptees do not necessarily come from "broken" families, Many don't even come from families to begin with. If anything, adoption should be seen as courage and strength from the birth parent(s)' end. It should be viewed as giving a child a better life and giving couples who can't have children, children. It's an amazing thing. Not sadness and brokenness. Adoption and being adopted is not all sunshine and rainbows, but it most definitely is not sadness or brokenness.

[@아포칼립토-m2k]

줄리안 너무너무 사랑하고 행복해~~^^ ❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻

[@HanVietcoupleChao]

It’s a Korean child I am also Korean, but the fact that Korea has many overseas adoptions hurts my heart, but I am so grateful that there is someone to take care of my child. I would be grateful if you would take good care of him. We support you.🤗🤗🤗

[@구르미-x9k]

당신은 최고의 엄마예요!♡(You are the best mother ever!♡)

[@aylas9637]

네네네!!!

[@sehansadventure5992]

Yes~~~~~

[@barbarasharon5818]

Gracefully broken!!! I am glad that in the hurtful moments you persisted in love.

[@옴뇸뇸-v2b]

그대들이 행복한인생을 완성해가는게 너무 감사하고 아름다워요♡

[@ritaluciapeinadomportillo9954]

muy impactante me imagino el sufrimiento de uds y julian se notaba que el estaba muy apegado a sus padres de acogida , quien lo hubiera imaginado tal ves lucharon tanto para tener ahora ese amor tan bonito que se tienen se nota que ahora es un niño seguro que se siente amado y protegido y que has sido una gran madre presente en todo tiempo, muchas bendiciones en jesus..

[@OLee-uh8rr]

Julian loves you an Luca. All can see and feel that. He is a lucky boy because he has you as a mom. ❤️

[@cicilyly6027]

Julian is so blessed to be with you and blessed for you to be his mother.

[@이름-b9t9p]

I miss baby Julian so much. Because it was so cute. I never forget Red and Apple🍎🍎🍎

[@tumbelinachipotleanchovyst523]

Thanks for always being such a genuine person. You’re a great mom 🌸 Hugs

[@donnadee1966]

Thank you for being so honest about the journey... adoption is ultimately rooted in loss and children can react so differently. I think a lot of parents, despite all their preparation have experienced this. Your consistency, faith and unconditional love ultimately helped him to feel safe again. I can't imagine how hard it was on all of you. Your boys are beautiful!

[@erna9050]

Mel, you’re such an amazing mom and i hope you know that❤️ all of those things happened might be a horrible and scary moments for your family, but it’s incredible to know that how far you guys have come. Happy to know that you guys are doing good right now. keep going on!❤️

[@ariava7561]

I'm loving this kind of series, it really help us to understand you, Luca and Julian more. Sending you and the boys lots of love 🥰

[@melgutierrez]

Yay! So happy to hear that, thank you. Love you!

[@ariava7561]

@@melgutierrez 💕

[@painted_original]

Just heartbroken imagining how “the first night” was, and at the same time the fact that you went through is a perfect inspiration. Now he seems so stable, loved, and perfect.

[@judithryle2113]

I hope you find a wonderful man who will love you and the boys so much. You are a wonderful sweet mom and deserve a loving relationship

[@Nino0221]

I don't know what to say. You are so strong and sharing your story is eye opening. You are really inspiring.

[@alicewon-kim2141]

You speak of adoption grief so honestly, with love.

[@joselynengaling6932]

The foundation of adoption is love. Treat your adoptee as your own child. In time you will see the result. Look at Julian, I love to watch how he acts as your son. He is so tender

[@alejandraespinosaboulogne9900]

Wow! Wonderful story with sorrows and pains but at the end with Our Lord all things are better ever!! Congrats Mel ,God chooses You because He knows You can fill Julian's little heart with all the love! Love You so much!!

[@jenced80]

Yoooo, this was emotional to watch. I cannot imagine the depths of pain watching a child suffer like that, but my God, the miracle of steadfast, patient, faithful love... that was God's kind of love, Mel. That is the realist, purest kind of love you were offering, babe, even when bubba didn't think he wanted it, you stayed beside him and tried and tried. That's as close to God level love as we can get. I just want to squeeze you, girl. I felt this vlog. Thank you for the truth.

[@melgutierrez]

Wow Jennifer. I really needed this comment. Thank you for that and your sweet encouragement. It means more than you can ever know 🥺

[@Ppomoch]

Me tocó el corazón. Me sorprende saber que haz pasado por cosas tan duras y tan fuertes; es cierto que yo veía en todos tus blogs una sonrisa y un buen animo de tu parte pero te juro que no tenía idea de lo que habías estado pasando. Te sigo hace poco y no me cabe duda de que eres súper increíble. Nunca te des por vencida, sigue luchando hasta el final, ten los ánimos de seguir adelante y darles lo mejor a tus pequeñitos, ellos te agradecerán el enorme esfuerzo que haces cada día para levantarte y sonreír. No estás sola :) tienes a tus familiares y amigos y por supuesto a tus fieles seguidores que te mandamos muy buena vibra y consuelo desde alguna parte de este mundo. Eres increíble y todos tus esfuerzos serán recompensados algún día. ❤️❤️❤️

[@chintyacusanto2428]

Park Jimin 🥰

[@lynsmith6490]

The whole process was definitely painful. You also have to remember that his situation was painful to begin with. Being with his foster mom (oma), not his real mom/family. Then you have to also remember that Julian doesn’t have coping mechanism back then. You don’t look like Korean, you don’t speak Korean, and culturally you guys are different. It must be scary and shocking for a child to go through that. That’s traumatic and you add the other daily challenges that you had to face. Being a mom and a wife (back then). I like the concept of adoption, only if there’s a real compatibility with both sides. It will definitely take a lot of love and time. I’m praying for your strength and success.

[@kayim3537]

Thanks for sharing your story. I was crying to hear your love and patience:. Luca and Julian is the most luckiest and happiest children because they have you. God bless you and your family eternally.

[@vinny5013]

If the lord can lead you to it, He can lead you through it !

[@aikawacitta5]

I think Julian have a hard time about languages. Because he used to hear and understand Korean at the first and then all of you with English is completely make him scared because he couldn't understand it at all. So at the his ages he learn little by little and when he understands he thinks so much safer. You're doing a good job❤

[@gherkinchubs9025]

I plan on adopting always have.. I love your channel and it encourages me more and also shows the realistics of it so thank you. You are amazing x

[@rabmaherrera]

Yo ví tu historia de adopción, en realidad ví muchas, y realmente si se nota en la carita de los niños quizás la confusión o el miedo. Pero también ví videos posteriores de tu familia y la sonrisa del niño al tiempo no tiene precio. Se ve realmente feliz. Me alegro mucho. Gracias por compartir tu historia.

[@evagutierrez1363]

Julian has been one of the biggest blessings in your life!!!♥️🙏

[@qqytur]

Thank you Mel for sharing such honest and beautiful story with us. I can’t imagine how hard it would be for you to bring back all those memories of hardships and decide to sit down to go over. You and your family definitely send us strong message of God and love. Love you ❤️

[@jhk.a.281]

Owww my heart 😭 I just keep remembering Julian saying "엄마 좋아" to you in one of the Korea vlogs (meaning "I like Momma"💕) when you're feeding him noodles, and it makes me so happy to see your journey with him. I love how you respected his privacy and didn't insert clips of him grieving over some upbeat song, and you're sharing what you want when you're ready. Sending all the best to your family 😘

[@nekhitakassey42]

As someone who is looking to adopt in the future, this is really insightful, and I appreciate your sincerity and honesty. I do have some questions though. Do you mind talking about international and transracial adoptions? I feel like that's not talked about enough. If not, I understand as it can be a very sensitive subtopic of adoption. My other question is, do you still keep in touch with Julian's foster family? Hope you guys have a chance to go back to visit them, and it could be a great experience for all. Sending lots of love ❤️

[@lisab.1559]

International adoption is awesome, only 1st adoption was hard, but today we are on our 5th adoption.

[@karenbickford8451]

Look up Levi's adoption

[@ilyooo]

I’m a Guatemalan adoptee with two Italian/russian American parents. What about transracial adoption do you want to know about?

[@dulcemaylethernandezcortaz3747]

Fueron inevitable las lágrimas al escuchar lo difícil que fue para ustedes y el pequeño Julián, pero también me lleno de amor y esperanza el saber y ver cómo lo superaron. ❤️ Diosito los bendiga a todos son una familia de luz.

[@soxnation1000]

Your videos are so heartwarming and fill me with such hope. I discovered your adoption videos maybe two weeks ago and I think I've binge watched all your videos already. You are such an inspiration!

[@빛과소금-v6k]

영어해석능력자분 해석좀^^동윤이 보고싶어왔는데 무슨말인지 궁금해요

[@kimjinkyoung1690]

너무 길어서 자세하게는 못적겠어요 ㅠ동윤이 입양했을때 처음에 얼마나 힘들었는지, 그리고 그걸 이겨내고 지금은 얼마나 행복한지에 대해서 자세히 얘기해주네요 입양에 대해서 너무 환상만 갖지 말았으면하는 마음에서요. 처음 세달동안 줄리안이 밤새도록 울고불고 밀어내고 했다네요 ㅠㅠ 자세한거는 다른분이 디테일하게 적어주시지 않을까요? ㅎㅎ 아, 루카하고 관계도 처음에 너무 힘들었대요 부모한테 마음을 열고난 후에도 형하고 친해지는데 오래걸렸고, 루카는 그때 5살이어서 그걸 이해못하고 힘들어했지만, 결국엔 한발 물러서서 기다려주고 지금은 보통 형제처럼 많이 싸우고 고자질도 하지만, 우애깊은 형제가 되었다네요 ^^

[@빛과소금-v6k]

@@kimjinkyoung1690 감사합니다.난 동윤이 엄마가 얼굴표정이 안좋으면 혹시 동윤이 버림받을까봐 가슴이 철렁합니다.기쁘네요

[@minSunshine33]

전반적으로 입양의 어려운면에대해서 얘기하고 있어요. 다들 영상보면서 입양하고싶다는 이야기를 많이 하는데 영상에 나오는 밝고 좋은모습은 아름다운 순간만 기록 해 놓은것이고 어려운 일도 많았다고요. 동윤이 입양 신청하고 데리러 오는데만도 1년이라는 시간이 걸렸대요. 또 동윤이 처음에 만났을때 기대를 많이 했는데 첫날 밤 부터 엄마를 찾고 멜을 발로차고 기겁하고 하는 모습을 보면서 가슴이 찢어지고 '아 내가 동윤이한테 무슨일을 벌인거지' 라는 생각을 했대요. 결국은 동윤이 한테는 엄마에게서 강제로 떨어지게 된 거랑 같으니까요. 그리고 이게 3개월 동안 매일 밤 되풀이 되었고 멜이 달래주려는것도 거부하고 하는게 마음아팠대요. 루카도 너무 어려서 이해를 못하고 울고 힘들어하고 동윤이는 루카가 다가오는걸 거부했대요. 어느날 동윤이가 두시간동안 울고있는데 너무 지친 멜이 하느님께 제발 도와달라 기도를 많이하고 동윤이를 안았는데 동윤이가 처음으로 안기면서 달래주는걸 받아들이더래요. 그리고 그때부터 조금씩 조금씩 관계가 느리게 좋아졌고 지금에 이르게 된 거에요.

[@빛과소금-v6k]

@@minSunshine33 감사합니다.멜이랑.루카 동윤이 모두 힘든시간이였군요.난 동윤이 밝고 행복한모습만봐서 그리 힘든줄 몰랐네요.해석해주셔서 고맙습니다

[@삼둥이앵두리버드]

감사합니다 ^^ 식겁했는데

[@krolcarolkr]

It only hurts when it’s truly love. I’m sure deep down in Julian or the day he begin to understand with everything happened, he’s and he will be very grateful to be your child and to be love by you and his dad. And he will love you guys for the rest of his life ❤️

[@Cecilia-fc3sg]

Oh Mel. My heart breaks for Julian and what you all went through. Adoption isn't always roses and rainbows. 2 of my grandchildren are adopted from the foster care system andmy grandson is now 17 and has had a rough go of it. He came to our family when he was 4. But he's in better shape now. I'm so so grateful Julian and Luca have both settled into a good relationship. And most of all, I'm so glad you have come through the fire and are ok. You are loved and special to so many. Hang in there!

[@CJ-gp9cn]

Thank you for sharing. I am preparing to adopt and these real stories are so helpful in setting realistic expectations. 🙏 thank you x

[@lotuswolf1518]

You're very special and strong , it's hard to be a single mom of even one kid and you have two, hope you continue keeping them happy and being happy yourself , Julian desveres the world ,stay strong.

[@샤오랑]

I am not good at English, so it was hard to understand what you said, but I want to briefly tell you how I really feel. I thought it was a sad situation because the title was sad. I always support you and your family. It may be difficult as it is a Corona situation, but I have no doubt that you will overcome it well. Be happy always. I support you as much as I am your subscriber. And you can't say it's going to work out from the beginning, right? I'm not sure, and I think it's a big deal to do it step by step. I wouldn't have done it. I've had a lot of ups and downs in my life. He was sick, depressed, and lived in Hikikomori for years. It's different from what you did, but I overcame it! There must have been many difficulties and there must have been a lot of noise to overcome them. Thank you for getting through this. That's cool!

[@bxthsy]

Im not a parent and I’m not planning to be one anytime soon haha but this video really just gave me that little mid-week push/motivation. In others words: hope. It’s been rough lately but it reminded me that i just have to be patient with the process. You really had me crying lol, thank you Mel for sharing this side of the journey🤍

[@맘맘-l7h]

음~~ 다시 와봤는데도 해석이 없네.. 내일 다시 와봐야지... 똑똑한 우리한쿡사람이 있을거야.....😁

[@kimjinkyoung1690]

위에 댓글에 찾아보심 나와용

[@xrxjx6544]

Julian is such a happy child. It's so sad to think that he was heartbroken and having a difficult time processing the new changes. He is a strong child. My 10 yr old went through a little eating disorder this past year (covid). He is an only child so being isolated was hard at times. Food was one of his comforts, he would eat so much until he threw up. Thankfully he is doing much better and working on eating healthier and being active.

[@dianafernandez2999]

It was your loud prayers that brought about the change slowly You practically bombarded heaven with your prayers.You are a good mum.God bless you.🙏✨

[@dianafernandez2999]

Sorry also his father who was taking care of Luca.God bles both🙏✨

[@vinnashelviani0994]

Keep strong Mel, i love you

[@selena.nicole9652]

It’s brilliant how you gelled together. I saw how he grieved and now it seems as if he was born to you.

[@sophiesoh3254]

This must have been really tough to share, so thank you for being really open and vulnerable about your adoption journey 🥺 Hope you are doing okay with your 2 lovely boys! ❤️❤️

[@claudettelewis8808]

Mel, you did well. God gives you what you can handle and boy what a super Mom you are. Your boys just show so much love and that just speaks volume of what a strong, phenomenal woman you are.❤❤❤🙏🏽

[@melgutierrez]

Thank you! 😭

[@elizabeth5193]

Thank you for your honesty. I think that adoptive parents need to anticipate this kind of trauma response in the child as they are suddenly taken from everything that is familiar. Adoption agencies need to take a lot more time to allow the child to attach to their new parent before this enormous change is pushed on the child. There are so many challenges with adoption, and as inspiring as people are who are willing to adopt, people need to take this on with eyes fully open. I think you did an amazing job being there for him during this time of grief and loss. The emotional holding that you did for him helped to develop secure attachment to you, you helped him move through his trauma and this will enable him to be better adjusted as he moves forward in his life. Thank you for being so strong, so loving, and for not giving up. He is very lucky to have you!

[@kaydonna5893]

Hey Mel, I've seen your youtube about 2yrs now... and thank you for letting us to know that "adoption" isn't just beautiful thing, it is reality.. have to wait, and wait.. because baby was so hard.. don't know what ppl say, different language, about 12hours different.. now I can tell how hard you try and love him.. Now julian is the most lovely boy in the world in your family! When i watch your video, you make me go to church lol (i don't specific religion) haha thank you for inspiring me as always you did🥺💛

[@TochiTama]

Being in a brokenness is such a bittersweet moment because you feel awful but then you can really feel God working in you and taking away the pain and sorrow. Thank you for sharing Mel, you are a great mami and your boys adore you!

[@Airasya]

I cried while watching this video, its so touching I cant imagine how strong you are Mel🥺🥺 Julian is so lucky to have you as His Parent😊

[@tashmee10]

this really pulled on my heartstrings 🥺

[@Alaboy19]

I’m so proud of you love🥺❤️.

[@megan5498]

Remembering what you all went through made me cry today all over again. Adoption of course is necessary, but it is so complex and heavy at times. Thank you for sharing this.

[@hanna4096]

Thank you for your sharing! I'm Korean. We also have two boys. Youngest one was adopted. Now he is four years old. So many times my husband and I struggle with same problem as you like. Through your sharing I find answer and am comforted. You said "God is always working". It toutched my heart. I like your loving heart.~♡

[@yosii1920]

Julián is so fortunate to have you as his Mami 🥰

[@julietmo4261]

Thank you for your resilience and strength in never giving up on your child. God really is at the center of our lives. I pray that your family stay safe and continue to show us what is means to live through the ups and downs of life.

[@nicoleparedesbellido2361]

I do not have children but I adopted a puppy maybe it is not the same but when she came to my house she did not want to be with me, she cried and bit, when she slept in my arms I felt relief, with patience and love I managed to make her love me and always this with me 🥺 mel you are an incredible woman that your relationship with julian will be stronger because he is very cute 🥰 many blessings for your family 🤍

[@withrachel5628]

I remember the face you made in the video shot on the very next day after the adoption day. I truly felt your guilty, broken-hearted mind. You have done the most beautiful job over this journey.

[@vea-irishlacastesantos4311]

I am with you since the adoption and I can also feel so much love to how he's grown. He's so blessed to have a family like yours, we can all feel the love that ur showing to joonie. God bless you even more!

[@susanbaldwin4478]

Kudos to you for telling it the way it was. So many adoptive parents see the kids smiling and so happy right away feel their is something wrong with them when they watch the videos. He certainly loves you to pieces now! So glad you could work through al that. Love you guys an love your channel

[@kthxbye98]

He’s obsessed with you now 🥺❤️

[@kshee1211]

Hi Mel, I’ve been watching your videos from the very beginning of your channel, but this is my first time to leave a comment. While watching your other videos where your family are having a great time together and caring for one another, I honestly had no idea what you had to get through and how hard you tried to make it better until you got to this point, just where you are today. You’re the most genuine person and I can feel that every video you’re making is real. I wish you and family all the best. Thank you for sharing and I just hope you can also get some comfort from the comments of the people who really love and support you throughout your journey.

[@svenjaserafin5242]

Thank you for sharing this very challenging and tough times with us. Julian is very lucky to have you as a family but also you are very lucky to have him as your child. It's a good thing that you got yourself educated on the grieving process and always tried to understand Julian's feelings. It all payed off so to speak.

[@allisonl2726]

I cried like a baby while watching. You r such an inspiration for others! God bless your family always!