My Wife Wants To Be A "Trad" Wife But I Want A Divorce...

[@curlsncoilsnwaves7324]

I am a stay-at-home wife who homeschools our two children. I'm thankful my husband sees the value in all I provide for our family.

[@michellelavature461]

He probably would be ok with it if she was being productive as homeschooling their children also

[@goodnessbealways-good3366]

Thank you! While I think everyone has the right to do what they deem profitable in their own marriages, I appreciate a mom who stays home, takes care of the house and the children. One thing I miss is all the time I had with my children and home school.

[@JohnCherubin]

You home school your kids that is a MAJOR value a majority of fathers would appreciate and value

[@tinachowa1108]

Well you homeschool your children, it’s clearly not the same thing. You are comparing apples and oranges.

[@nalungaagnes1884]

It's good you love being a stay home wife. Unpopular opinion, one can be a house wife and still earn some money for themselves. Speaking on my experience, I this is the kind of setup my family was growing up. I must say I had the best father in the world and would never replace them, he provided everything and ensured we had the best education. My mum was a full time stay home mum and was doing some small businesses for herself at home. Fast forward, 2010, my father passed on due to kidney failure, all of us 8kids were still in school with my eldest brother 1st at University. We lost everything, life was hard, sometimes we slept hungry. Worse, we left with a very huge debt by my dad to pay😢, my mum had no help, luckily she's educated and was able to find a good job, and us all through school. Also God was on our side, the Catholic church paid for our tuition upto when my mom was able stand on her 2 feet. Today we all are graduates and have a good life. We were lucky but how many women are this lucky. I really hope that many women come to know the importance of financial independence. And don't get me wrong, being a housewife isn't bad, but one can be a house wife and still earn something. Get out a few hours a day to do some freelance work that could bring in some money.

[@schuylersnipez]

It’s the man’s job to take care of the kids and wife. My wife will never work because it’s my job. If it gets too expensive it’s my job to solve that. We have a perfect marriage and I would never even think of divorce. Stick to Gods ways and everything works out way better then anything the world comes up with

[@Bee-dp3st]

💯

[@pandaking1300]

Beat me to it. God bless you brother and your family

[@joemariedeguzman9204]

God bless you for being a real man.

[@hannahwalker9586]

Exactly may God continue to bless your marriage💯🫶

[@NonYa-l9t]

You're a gem. Most men don't want a Godly marriage.

[@tenille-west]

Truthfully, I’m on neither side. Many want the so-called ‘trad wife’ lifestyle without considering its biblical origins and how the media romanticizes homemaking. The biblical model of marriage (also known as traditional) only works when God is at the center of the marital union; it won’t make sense if you separate marriage from the word of God. God has to be present regardless what role(s) both the husband and wife serve.

[@bigelowkaryn]

Agreed. And also, in the Bible, women did more than “homemaking.” Women were also working in the fields and doing other things. Most of human history required men and women to both work. It’s only because of technology and urbanization that the new model (era 1950s) for homemakers that this is possible

[@yahwehvidas2431]

AMEN 👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@cisuminocisumino3250]

​​​@@bigelowkarynTrue, but they're primary role was homemaking, everything they did was centered around that. For-instance If a woman was going to Fetch firewood and water it's because she was going to do the cooking.

[@G.A-m1t]

100%

[@roxannescott6956]

Amen 🙏

[@KARGM]

I love how Christian men want a woman to submit and be old fashioned in their role BUT when it comes to them being the sole provider according the their role- then there’s a problem.

[@sweetpeach3293]

Exactly!

[@reresheishere]

The man isn’t Christian in the scenario lol

[@Davidtheentrepreneur]

Where does the Bible say A man has to be the sole provider. A proverbs 31 women is taken care of her household and bringing money as well. There’s a balance.

[@simplyameeraj]

She is wrong for leaving her job without telling him but for the sake of the family…. How about letting her stay at home for 6 months to a year as a trial run.

[@asaintnamedslickback]

W compromise, I like this. A solution minded woman of God 🙏🏿.

[@shalayne9054]

I think if she was a working girl most of her life and she stayed home 6mo to a year she'd hate it. I say let her do it, she'll go crazy. Plus when you have so much time on your hands you'll spend money, no doubt. It'll be an extra expense for sure.

[@faithrose4440]

I work extremely hard my whole life the only time I'm happy is periods where I can stay home

[@Leddiemsbetty]

@@shalayne9054 Honestly, before medschool, I was a travel nurse (1000 miles+ from home), and I use to go crazy the 3 months I was at home not on contract. I had to do short contracts and longer home time for our kids when they were out of school. Woman of God, I ended up renovating our entire guest bedroom, closet and all, even revamped the driveway, started a whole garden, I even crochet blankets... BLANKETS!!... If we didn't have kids, I would have worked a full 11months out of the year. If she has a working mentality, she will go insane being a "trad wife". I'm West Indian, and we raise our daughters to be homemakers (I can sew, cook and mend clothes and still change oil on a car) but I'd go crazy if my full time job was a stay-at-home-mom... I'm in concurrence with your point.

[@tiffanyn333]

Def a good suggestion, try it out, then come back to convo....she def. Shouldn't have just quit though with out talking about it first.

[@doreenscott4654]

Whatever the issue is divorce is not the answer. Communication and respect is needed on both sides, not anger and resentment. Pray together. Work together. Love one another. 😊

[@slappinbass8052]

Ehh, I can’t get behind “whatever the issue is divorce is not the answer”. Divorce isn’t ideal, but it for sure has its place.

[@sherrybrandeberry1831]

Well said

[@rjc9537]

Why would he even consider divorce for this?

[@terseandtiny1746]

She went against his express wishes and lied by omission.

[@rjc9537]

@ So it’s ok divorce based on a lie? She didn’t lie cause she was telling him for months what she wanted to do. It’s his fault for not understanding what his wife wanted to do! 🥴🥴🥴

[@asaintnamedslickback]

​@@terseandtiny1746 Not biblical though, L take.

[@angiew2324]

​​@@asaintnamedslickback Seems like quite a few people in the comment section either don't care about the Biblical perspective, or they don't understand it. It's sad. Kids also deserve to have a mom that's home when they get home from school. Most jobs don't allow for that, the kids have to go to daycare or stay home alone for a while until mom and/or dad gets home. There is more to raising kids than just getting them ready to start school, parenting continues to be 24/7 until they're adults.

[@ashleynicole9423]

@@terseandtiny1746I’m pretty sure that’s not a reason for dovorce according to the bible 😂

[@EthanPageHunter]

I’m a young father and husband that’s the soul provider of the home. My wife stays home to raise our kids and homeschool them. Even if she wasn’t raising and schooling, what she does would still be a full time job. Keeping a house of 4+ people is a lot of work and I respect her for it!

[@theshenanigans545]

Wow American women are suffering here in Africa its very normal to stay at home raising the kids ,taking care of the home,doing nothing,,,,,she can have whatever. Lol my mom quit her job when we were so young to raise us,21 years later she got bored of staying at home since our lastborn went to highschool and my dad opened a business for her this year which is flourishing by the grace of God. The divorce word is so quick to come up in western countries especially when it involves finances. Infact where im from its like a tabboo eating your wives money .Cultural differences are crazy. The wife was wrong for going about it like that the husband was wrong for following up like that. May our marriages never break because of finances in Jesus name.

[@FeriaMoney]

YES WE ARE SUFFERING THAT IS WHY I AM SINGLE AND TAKE CARE OF MYSELF AND UNLIKE MOST PEOPLE I CANNOT BE BOUGHT 💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@trishap.7165]

Amen oh may our marriages never break in Jesus Name

[@pierrettedjoko8777]

In Africa? Say in your country or culture because it not the case for many family here in Africa.

[@WellWiseBeauty]

Amen! God bless your family. Honestly it is western culture, what is even worse these men want traditional women but don't want traditional man responsibilities. Even comments about proverbs 31 women but fail to mention she had a housekeeper, and the verse that refers to men I quote ' if you do not provide for your own household, you are worser than an unbeliever'. it makes no sense at all

[@keelhe893]

Don’t generalize people. Many women in African countries are living in horrid conditions and experiencing divorce. Some of the reports I hear of the violence in African homes the women would be better off going to work. You can’t speak for every American woman because one man doesn’t want his wife to stay at home. There are many Americans wives who stay at home and live in peace

[@asaintnamedslickback]

That's a bad take. Biblically, divorce us only valid in cases of adultery (and maybe abuse). It's not grounds for divorce, just make sure she's productive. You could have her homeschool the kids, she could take up projects like knitting or something. (Random note, I as a 20 year old guy find it attractive for a woman to be able to knit/sew or make certain foods from scratch)

[@asaintnamedslickback]

To be honest, he does have a terrible wife that doesn't respect him.

[@PridelessChickz]

Amen

[@ItsJae_37]

@@asaintnamedslickback true

[@katieharrington2845]

Wow I didn't think someone your age would feel this way 😮 I guess it's attractive to follow God's plan, and fore women to act feminine instead of feminism God bless you today

[@CCD_106]

Divorce is allowable for fornication which includes withholding sex from your spouse because that is against God's design for marriage. However, the marriage in this video seems more likely Muslim than Christian...

[@AM-sl9pw]

That’s crazy that he can AFFORD for his wife to be a SAHM but he still wants her to work like I will NEVER understand this mentality at all why even get married as a man if you don’t have the desire to provide for your wife and kids this is INSANE imo

[@ItsJae_37]

also the fact that he never even asked WHY she wants to be a SAHM, instead he just immediatly shot her down

[@AM-sl9pw]

@ honestly it sounds like he just doesn’t really like her that much imo lol

[@AM-sl9pw]

@ like the man was ready to get a divorce before even trying to contemplate any solutions/middle ground etc like that’s just insane 😭 sounds like he just doesn’t like her very much lol

[@Elohimchild]

He just needed a reason to initiate the divorce but he was already out the door.

[@asaintnamedslickback]

@@AM-sl9pw Honestly I agree

[@Holyisyourname]

He should’ve asked more questions. I would like to know who does the cooking, cleaning, who pays the bills and who picks up kids and who takes them to their appointments?

[@hellothere8347]

she shouldn't have quit her job on him. but if he got the money what's the issue and if he was so quick to divorce her is it even real love anyway?

[@tinachowa1108]

The issue is that what she did was disrespectful

[@ItsJae_37]

@@tinachowa1108 they were both being petty and disrecpectful to eachother

[@larissaalcorn3406]

Something tells me he doesnt trust her to be home all day.

[@larissaalcorn3406]

​@@tinachowa1108And so was his dismissive and controlling behavior. They BOTH are disrespectful to each other.

[@owlintrenchcoat]

I agree that divorce isn't justified here. They need to work it out. But what she did was a pretty huge betrayal of trust, to be fair. I do get why this is a major blow to him. She did serious damage to their relationship on a whim and she sounds like she really needs to grow up.

[@MoreenMascarenhas]

He definitely wants the extra money…. But divorce is totally uncalled for. He is starting to act like a P.I.M.P 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@charles8353]

, both sides are wrong. According to his religion, he felt disrespected by the wife's comment about the present which she purposely left for him to see. He shouldn't have overreacted that way but I am he consolated people first before concluding his reasoning towards the situation.

[@asaintnamedslickback]

​@@charles8353 She definitely disrespected him, she should've listened. However, I also think he should've provisioned for her. Both are cornballs, L spouses.

[@Mrs.Peets2u4life]

They probably live beyond their means and probably pay for private school.

[@tcdan-c2m]

@@charles8353 Exactly. BOTH sides are wrong in this situation.

[@goodnessbealways-good3366]

I know the man is a Muslim however, I thought it was extreme to threaten divorce in a marriage that He SAID had been perfect. There is a lot missing in this story, (the woman's side). I also thought it was strange that the man didn't even call his own child back. It's just strange.

[@DiscipleOfG]

@@goodnessbealways-good3366 it really looks like he wanted a way out

[@goodnessbealways-good3366]

@@DiscipleOfG I guess he found it. I hope they don't divorce because he will probably lose more than he thinks. Besides all the things that really matter in a marriage with love and having a help mate and his relationship with his children, he's probably going to find that it was cheaper to keep her. He said he could afford to take care of his family alone. Something is off!

[@AboveRubiesTV]

🎯🎯🎯

[@Jeremiah12]

It shows there are problems ins the marriage already and remember most muslim marriages are arranged.

[@mikedradio]

Welp.. this guy is going to deeply deeply regret what he’s doing. As someone who’s lost his family and have my kid half the week…. This guy is making so many mistakes. In answer to his question, YES he should get over it. Be a man… respectfully.

[@tarneshabryant]

F z,,😅q% 3:59 😂❤❤

[@mcemaryngcobobusisiwe8857]

the truth is men should provide and be great full if a woman works and is a house keeper

[@elizabethcartagena-vp5tp]

If we want women to provide, then men need to help with child rearing which is exceptionally strenuous. Ya'll treat us like we're them dang Tesla Robots.

[@wordwalkingonrightousnessdaily]

😂 true. They act like women are energizer bunnies. We work, cook, clean, take care of kids, attend school meetings, sex, and be happy while all most men do is work and pay the bills. So many women are literally SINGLE married moms🤦🏾‍♀️. I’m not pushing the trad situation but women most times do way more than the men in relationships. But we MUST keep God in the forefront of our marriages.

[@moni_bmdz]

💯

[@AT-mq9wk]

This is why I laugh when people say 50/50. The work will NEVER be evenly split because only the women have to be pregnant. So a man can do half the housework and bring in half the income, but he will NEVER have to do that while sacrificing his body to bring a child into the world. So why not just do 100/100. The wife gives 100% effort to domestic responsibilities and the husband gives 100% effort to financial responsibilities. That way both areas get full attention, not half.

[@AT-mq9wk]

@@wordwalkingonrightousnessdaily exactly! I told my fiancé, “you expect me to cook, clean, and take care of kids, on top of working full time because you saw your mom do it. The issue is, your mom was a single mother. She didn’t do all that because she wanted to. She did it because she had to. I bet if you called her right now and asked her if she would have done all of that if she had a good husband, she’d say ‘heck no!’” That conversation was what got him on board. That’s the issue. Too many people (especially men) were raised by single mothers and think that’s what all women have to do. But no married woman should have to do the jobs of two people.

[@aidadfrye]

As a stay at home wife/ mom ,very well said . Both parties potentially have a fault but have a good point. The wife needs to have a retrospective moment .you can’t take matters into your own hands when you’re working in partnership. If it is God’s will for you ,He will change your husband’s heart on the matter. Handling a situation like this without the Lordship of God gets very tricky and tough because as a married couple who are you accountable too when making decisions.

[@IMissChele9]

It sounds like he disregarded her feelings with that whole “I assumed she would get over it” & so she used the same line on him “you’ll get over it”. She took an extreme measure, because he wasn’t valuing/respecting her. The fact that he was so quick to jump to divorce says that he’s controlling, and probably doesn’t even love her.

[@PridelessChickz]

Amen.

[@ambersmith9563]

Right, even in total disagreement and complete anger, someone is ready to divorce that fast…ready to abandon someone in an instant, they don’t genuinely love that person; the actions do not line up with the definition of love

[@ItsJae_37]

@@ambersmith9563 yes!!

[@wendywilliams2220]

@@IMissChele9 Agreed

[@wendywilliams2220]

She basically was crying I can’t manage this anymore and he completely dismissed her. She even went so low in negotiations unlimited blow jobs smh this man is taking advantage of his wife.

[@CerebralTripz]

Sounds like the husband makes all the decisions himself already. Not surprised she acted that way. You can't be petty to your wife and be surprised when she serves you the same dish.

[@RagnarLoudpak]

“I work 80% and my wife 50%.” Am I tripping, or is that not how percentages work? What does this even mean?

[@ItsJae_37]

thats what im saying lol

[@connorgilbert1685]

Possibly their own time. He works 80% maybe 4-5 days a week and she does 50% maybe 2-3 days a week.

[@dahliaherrod4301]

I think they're referring to personal time. 80% of his time, 50% of her time.

[@Michael-pl9rb]

It means that he doesn't consider work at home ats doing anything

[@198Zofficial]

The husband also stated that his trust in his wife has been compromised. I'm not married. However, I know how important communication and trust is between strong couples. It sounds like she broke the two most important layers of foundation in her marriage. I pray for them both and maybe they can still work it out for their children. This was a tough one.

[@CerebralTripz]

I could say the same when the husband decided the answer was no. He wasn't thinking about a mutual agreement. It was just his way or divorce. He broke the trust first by already making the decision without taking her reasons seriously.

[@198Zofficial]

@CerebralTripz That's twisting the elements of the story. The husband clearly said that the reasons that were given to him didn't make sense at the moment. He said it didn't make sense for them to change things between them. So, evidently he listened and processed what she wanted. The wife tried tempting him into saying yes with all the reason why it would be beneficial for the husband to say yes. And he listened and said no. I'm sorry but my pet peeve is when people take the facts and try to manipulate them into what they want them to be.

[@tinachowa1108]

@@CerebralTripzno he didn’t break her trust by telling her no. He was dismissive, but not deceitful. Let’s not change the meaning of words. To break trust there must be an element of dishonesty or deception. Which perfectly describes her, going behind his back and leaving her job, putting all the burdens of the bills upon him. They are both wrong for different reasons.

[@angelrebekah9153]

​@@tinachowa1108he wasn't wanting to be a man sooo.....

[@nsan56]

I worked for 42 years and preferrred to be home and be available to my children for sports, the arts, and parents day at school. Hard to clean, cook every night, leave kitchen clean, prepare lunches for the kids, help with homework, wash clothes and iron 3 times a week and prepare clothes for next day. Spend quality time talking to my children everyday and gage their day, . Whew! Tired already.

[@AjaMcClahanan]

Are we going to ignore the fact that he moved out, blocked his wife AND STOP TALKING TO HIS CHILDREN over her quitting what seems to be a PART TIME JOB? This man didn't like his wife anyway, and this was just an excuse to justify divorce. There's a strong undertone of disdain and disgust as he talks about the situation. All the stay-at-home moms out there know there are plenty of things to do to manage a house, aside from cleaning whether kids are at home or not! (Yes, I'm a SAHM.)LADIES, DO NOT MARRY MEN WHO HATE WOMEN AND HAVE NO RESPECT FOR THEM. YOU WILL SUFFER! (No, she should not have quit without a discussion, but good thing she did because this revealed his heart.)

[@ashtonnn777]

MY THOUGHTS TOO

[@MsBlackQueen82]

I was going to say the same thing too. He went straight to divorce of all things. He definitely had his bags already packed in his mind he was ready to leave.

[@quarantinedteen5458]

Thank youu!!! What even is this

[@tcdan-c2m]

I think you're right. What he did was very immature, to say the least. BUT the wife is also to blame in part for the strife. Communication is KEY in relationships and there clearly was none.

[@candylicious3024]

I use to be a stay at home mom for many years and there ain’t nothing wrong with it!! I have 4 kids , 14, 10 , 6 , 2 year old. But I recently went back to the work field. Things have gotten hard over the years . My husband didn’t force me but I chose to go back to work so I can help my husband with bills and rent. It’s easier when 2 people can work together, especially in this day and age. But I think that man is a little ridiculous to want to divorce his wife because she wants to be home. That’s not a reason…. Just my opinion.

[@Turtle42082]

This is NOT a matter for divorce. That’s extremely odd to me that he wants to divorce her over this. If he makes enough money that they don’t need to both work, good for them! My husband would’ve celebrated that! SMH. Nick, you’re off point big time here. This story is SHAMEFUL. I agree her unilateral decision was inappropriate, but his response is highly childish.

[@CerebralTripz]

Yes!

[@tcdan-c2m]

I agree. That's definitely NOT a reason for divorce.

[@artman6976]

The wife was completely WRONG!! BUT....Divorce isn't the answer! She is going to regret quitting her job because women get bored 😂. I let my wife stay at home for 7 years!! It was great in my opinion because for 1, she's trust worthy. 2.. she's an amazing wife because she cooke and cleans and we don't have any kids. Our kids are grown. 3....During that 7 years, she got bored and decided that she wanted to go back to work. She ended up studying to get her real-estate license 😅. We're very happy.

[@kaseycorliss7282]

I want to know who is expected to do all the daily chores now because if shes working and coming home and cooking and cleaning, thats not 50% work thats more like 90% taking care of a home is a job.

[@ljones9841]

Exactly! She probably was tired. A lot of women work full time jobs and then come home to cook and clean. In addition, have to help with homework and other activities.

[@MrsBrittanyGold]

She shouldn’t have just quit her job w/o him being ok with it. He shouldn’t have just tossed divorce at her either. For better or worse- this is worse. I think something is going on that she no longer wants to work… they should get to the root of THAT, then compromise.

[@samismith1991]

So quick to divorce then it wasnt right with to begin with but God is not about seperation so yes a marriage takes work and 2 people 2 sides coming together

[@alisiajimenez]

At the beginning of our marriage, we knew very early on that we will have children. About 4 months into our marriage I found out I was pregnant with our first child. We knew that I was going to be staying home. We didn't have family around to help us watch our now three children. You still don't have family around. I do understand her reason and why she wanted to be a stay home mom or either a traditional wife because it's very challenging being a mother in general. Men will never understand the drift of being a mother. You guys will go to work, come home, play with the children, go to work, come home, and do the same thing all over again. That's all good and dandy. Children need more than just that. When they go doctor's appointments who are taking them there. You can't just take off work and say oh I'm taking our daughter or son to their doctor's appointment. Children has to get picked up from school. School usually is from 8:00 a.m. to like 3: 00 p.m. So what kind of job you going to have from 8:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. or at least 9:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. or something like that it's not worth it I don't think. Before and aftercare is expensive. With traffic and all, it's not worth it. Children has to be watched during the summertime when there's a whole 2 ½ months in the summer. Who going to be watching them? Yes, you can say put them in summer camp. Summer camp has a schedules too. It doesn't last the full summer time. When it's vacation time like all those holidays and things, who going to watch the kids then? When kids get sick, who watching them now? So, she rather stay at home to take care of the house and her children. Remember, that's a job a 24/7 job in itself. My husband and I just got into an small argument just because of this the other day. I told him you can leave me if you want to, but you will regret it in the long run because your children need both parents in the house to care for them. Our children are still in elementary school. Thank God I work for my husband. He is a licensed Painter Contractor. My work schedule is very very flexible to fit our children's school schedule. Plus, children need to be watched nowadays you cannot leave a child home alone under 12 years old without thinking something of the worst. That's why before even having children or getting married you should discuss finances and whose going to stay home when you have children. All those things matter. Even then, discussing it won't give you reality until you actually going through it yourself. She probably felt depleted. Getting u, getting the children ready for school, making their lunches, dropping them off at school, having to go to work, having to wait until about 3:00 to go pick him up again, to do the same thing again the next day, and probably with no help from her husband because he going to stay at work until he has to get off. MAN! I'm telling you... That's probably why she wanted to stay at home. That is so overwhelming. I went through that myself. That's a lot of stress work on the body. Nowadays, children aren't the best behaved either. Not alone yelling, screaming, and arguing with each other. Plus, fighting over different things. We all need help. No matter if it's a dad or a mom. So yes, I agree with some of the comments saying that he should get over it because he should. He said he makes enough money for his family. He should let his wife stay at home until at least their youngest go to high school. Plus, children grow up super fast. There's nothing like being a home be able to watch them grow and be able to poor life into them. This husband probably was not a family oriented man in the beginning. He should never had children in the first place. Having children is a big responsibility.

[@TheWilDOn31]

Exactly. Why don't men care about these things? Who do they think is raising their children? An exhausted woman with an ounce of patience and calm left in her because her body and mind can't take it anymore? And then they wonder why the kids aren't raised properly.. That was my situation growing up, with my father not understanding this, and our entire family is suffering and has been suffering for a long time because of it. Me and my brother are struggling in many areas of our lives. My brother is fighting a drug addiction for years, and that's not even the biggest problem. And for what? For an extra small salary that they spent on vacations and parties anyway? And a lot of money lost resolving problems that could have been prevented with a stay-at-home and mentally stable mother?

[@lisabaltzer4190]

You can’t leave a teenager at home alone either. They can get in even more trouble than a younger child. My sister and I were left alone and we had a kitchen fire and lived in a horrible neighborhood. Leaving teenagers alone can be a huge disaster.

[@runningbrownfox]

work was mans curse, not the woman. If he didn't react the way he did then the other things wouldn't have happened so I think he is completely in the wrong

[@asaintnamedslickback]

I'm iffy with this take. She didn't submit to her husband, but he has the ability to make his wife's life easier, yet refuses. Personally, I want to make enough for my future wife to stay at home 🤷🏿‍♂️.

[@ItsJae_37]

i think he should have *atleast* asked her why she even wants to stay at home instead of immidiatly shutting her down.. they should have talked it out, but instead they started being petty with eachother

[@AboveRubiesTV]

@@ItsJae_37 Apparently she has been talking about it for months, but he’s disregarded her thoughts and chalked it up to, “You’ll get over it.” Then, when she uses the same phrase, out of pettiness, he’s enraged. It seems like tit for tat, but I definitely would let him go if he tried to divorce after not getting HIS own way.

[@eternallifenothell4942]

@runningbrownfox. I was waiting on this comment! Especially since we're speaking biblically! Some have no idea what goes into staying at home. There are SO many more duties than just cleaning the house.

[@ladadee4175]

I never thought about it that way....hmm

[@jbhinson1]

I think we didn’t get enough info. What if she is already doing all the home task and trying to work. If both are working both should help around the house

[@rachelann6075]

I have worked my whole life. I have supported my partner financially when he couldn't, many times. Our children are in their early and middle teens. If he were to tell me that i could now stay home and not work.. I would be ALL OVER that. These days, Sometimes as women we are expected to do everything. Work, cook, clean, be pregnant and raise kids, AND our husbands. We are tired too. So yes I believe in stay at home mothers, or "Trad" wives as you call them.

[@TheAmhyacinth]

The only question I have is WHY. I don't think I heard in the original letter why she said she wanted to stay home, and if it's a 2 month old conversation, there should be a why.

[@levoniaswails3746]

Homework is relentless and so are sports activities. I don’t know how many programs they have at school and laundry is always a nightmare for most people. How much does he contribute in time and what is the work life balance. Are the kids successful in their spaces. Toddlers are not the only age groups that need intense support. 🤷🏽‍♂️

[@pedrooliver7218]

bro a woman that goes to work and still have to come home and take care of the family is stressing... i hope he helps with getting dinner ready i hope he helps clean, i hope he helps out with the kids cause all of that cant be on her alone

[@pedrooliver7218]

and plus after her taking care of all those chores she must please you!! hmph let that woman stay home

[@AmakaNjoku-E]

Honestly this woman wants the aesthetics of a Trad wife while completely disrespecting her husband. There’s nothing traditional about manipulating your husband and disregarding his headship.

[@monikadavikas56]

@@AmakaNjoku-E We don't really know the whole story. Just a piece of one side. It's better not to judge that. People can tell a lot on the Internet.

[@AmakaNjoku-E]

@ @ Traditionalism speaks to a woman being submissive to her husband and not usurping his authority. Trad wife is a TikTok/Social media aesthetic. The fact that she quit her job like that misses the whole point of Traditionalism. Now in regards to whether she should or shouldn’t stay home & how they got there yes both sides are needed. Some things are clear.

[@monikadavikas56]

@@AmakaNjoku-E If it was really like that with the two, then yes I don't think their behavior is right, you should subordinate yourself as a woman to the man and talk about it in a marriage before you just do things like that. Nowadays, marriages break up so quickly and people break up because of various things that could have been worked on. I don't mean it badly. I just said we don't know both sides and what really was, because we only heard one side at least through this video.

[@monikadavikas56]

@@AmakaNjoku-E I don't like tiktok and the trends are annoying too. With the trad wife thing, I'm also unsure if it's real or just show for attention. And sorry for my English if something is wrong.

[@ethiogirl310]

I would love to be a SAHM again. Those were the times in my life that I felt most fulfilled. I would love to homeschool our children.

[@TheNathanMac]

His thinking is super flawed. A disagreement like this doesn't automatically think or mean divorce! That's far too extreme. But also... The sex as a weapon that the wife used is completely broken too. Lord have mercy, they both need help.

[@PascaleK-fj9gm]

Is it a weapon or did she lose too much respect for him? He disregarded her and won’t let her stay home. Some women shut down because the loss of respect is rough

[@TheNathanMac]

@PascaleK-fj9gm to say that she will withhold sex because she's not getting her own way is using sex as a weapon.

[@PascaleK-fj9gm]

@@TheNathanMacshe said that or is that how he perceives it?

[@PascaleK-fj9gm]

@ with hold or she was completely turned off and lost respect for him?

[@mosesaustin8922]

Just my opinion here I’m a 25 year old husband and father I provide 100% for my family my wife stays home with the kids we have two small children and I do t mind what I do I love it but I do it with the condition that my wife’s responsibilities are taken care of while she’s at home and as long as it’s done I have no problem providing 100% the problem comes when people in general want t to stay home with no expectation of responsibility or duty but this is just my opinion though looking at this as objectively as possible

[@m.h6858]

I hate to break the bad news to him, but a divorce MAY not stop anything😬🤷🏾‍♀️ I was a stay-at-home mom for my family at the request of my job ex-husband. I WANTED to work in the marriage, considering I had my degree and was a teacher. When I had my second child, it didn't make sense financially. After the divorce, he then WANTED me to work, but I'm still raising our youngest daughter(his only child) who is a minor. Three years post divorce, I'm STILL doing what I was doing IN the marriage, just without the added stress of a husband, lol! And my oldest daughter is now grown and moved out as well! Praise be! 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@kweneojo]

"You'd get over it" The disrespect. I mean a divorce isn't it but that wife isn't even trying to keep the marriage. Also doesn't sound like he's had a proper conversation with his wife to understand her reasons tbf.

[@asaintnamedslickback]

Exactly, L spouses

[@anneshirley95]

He said that to her first though. 🤷‍♀️ not saying it's right.

[@kweneojo]

@@anneshirley95 he didn't say that to her first. he said "he felt" she'd get over it and that it was a phase. he never said "you'd get over it" to her face. watch again.

[@barb2035]

I had to send my 9 month old son to daycare and he is still messed up till this day. He is 38 years old. On the other hand I stayed home with my daughter all the way through. She just got married at 23 years old to a pastor's son. They both graduated college. She has turned out completely opposite as my son who had both parents working through his whole childhood. I also was raised with a stay at home mom and I know it makes a very big difference!! It was financially a struggle but to see my daughter today I know it was worth the sacrifice.

[@robertacanderson]

If they can afford it then why not allow her to stay home?

[@LouLou-vk5xm]

Sounds like he doesn't trust her. He wants to know what she's going to be doing all day.

[@samismith1991]

I stay on a farm and im not married yet but i live my day each day as a home maker, i clean every day it is possible and you have to make the decision to put your home making into something else in the home, there is so much to do. The only thing is it can get a bit much so getting out the house as a family means so much more and is appreciated

[@samismith1991]

And yes if Christ aint the centre of it it will feel like a sentence rather than a blessing

[@kkbattle3536]

Wives/mothers do a lot. It’s easier to do all that we do for our families if we don’t have to work. We should also have the choice to work if we want to. I take issue with a man who wants me to do everything he does, like we have to be 50-50, because we will never be truly equal, imo.

[@terseandtiny1746]

I'm with the husband...i don't think divorce is the answer but he has the right to be extremely angry.

[@rjc9537]

@@terseandtiny1746 EXTREMELY is a little much don’t you think? 🥴

[@jayjay-hm4ns]

@@rjc9537yeah “extremely” is a bit much, but definitely being angry is valid.

[@Abba_Jesus]

It's a dem husband, of course he'll prefer divorce

[@TeraHadaway]

It's absolutely crazy to want to divorce your wife all of a sudden when she simply wants to be able to take care of her family better. I did the stay at home thing for a while & it made me & my husband closer than ever, I had time to keep our house clean all the time, always have breakfast, lunch & dinner ready & spend much needed time in the Word & in Praise with Our Lord Jesus. It was so needed for my soul, my mental & my health in general which in return was that for my husband also. But I do agree that she handled that horribly. You do not withhold sex from your spouse in a spiteful way to get your way, that's awful. The only reason you withhold sex is to get closer to God.

[@ItsJae_37]

honestly both are in the wrong... they were both being kinda petty towards eachother and there was lack of communication. -He never even asked the wife the reason she wanted to be a SAHM, instead he immidiatly said no -a divorce being the first thing you go to is insane -the wife should not have just quit her job without telling him -why did he block her.... there was already enough miscommunication between them

[@LGJiG]

Why is the husband policing what she does at home while he’s at work. It sounds childish. “If I have to work, you do too, EVEN IF YOU DONT WANT TO”. Men love a beautiful woman. Women are most beautiful when we can rest and reset. We are not built for work like men are.

[@deborahhosseyanehema3525]

I totally understand what you meant. As for my humble opinion, divorcing the wife for this reason ain't an option. But dialogue is. The man has to get to the level of his wife and understand what's really motivated her to this decision taking, and as you advised, seek God's guidance. Thank you for sharing the story. God bless you!

[@mp4-27d3]

She asked about staying home and she said no. She pouted and did it anyway. She didn’t consider him, or the marriage, she just did what she wanted. There’s no trust and if there’s no trust, there’s no relationship. She doesn’t even think she did anything wrong, so what are you doing? There is no marriage…just two people making their own decisions.

[@CCD_106]

Seems weird to react to this video because the couple does not seem to identify as Christian...🤷🏾‍♂️

[@saidaaaab]

I agree with everything u said. We are a Christian family, I’m a stay at home wife and have 2 kids, one in school the other is a toddler and i am due again. The way he said things is wrong and the way she did things in wrong. They need to talk & figure it out. I agree with all u said.

[@quarantinedteen5458]

Em I don’t think he actually loves her. Hear me out. Most men would happily take care of their family financially if they could (and the man clearly mentioned he could) there is some contempt here or something. Only reason she got rebellious was because there was a need to. Don’t agree with what she did either but the husband seems like a terrible person. Cause what do you mean you CAN provide and don’t want to ?Wouldn’t you want your wife to be as stress- free as possible? As much as the lady was not 100% right on the acting up part. Something about him doesn’t sit right with me. He might not appreciate the value of women

[@BlessedIshi]

The husband never indicated why this is such a big problem for him, and the wife never indicated why this was so important to her.. without that information, it's difficult to determine an opinion on it. Personally, I love how the ideal wife is described in Proverbs 31. My favorite is verse 27 - "she does not eat the bread of idleness." I'm left to assume that the wife's intentions had laziness attached; otherwise, the husband wouldn't be so against the idea. I'm a single mother with chronic pain, and while it would be awesome to rest now and then (that's what sick time is for) I still can't see myself not being a citizen of the world who gets up and makes herself useful in it.. that's me personally. My youngest child is 17. If the intention is to sit at home and eat the bread of idleness, I'd highly consider divorce.. but I'd have to include Yahweh in that decision.

[@sonnysplaytime6203]

I think sex as a weapon often is misinterpreted. Having sex with someone you feel angry and resentful towards feels repulsive. Like I hate you right now, you hurt me or you're making me feel bad but now I have to endure you literally on top of me and inside of my body. It feels disgusting when you don't want it. Due to medication I completely lost my libido. I throw it at my husband a few times a week. He has no idea that it makes me miserable. That I pray silently in my head for it to be over quick. That I would literally rather be doing anything else like eating dirt. But I don't show it so he has no clue. It's so depressing that I will have to go decades doing this. But if I don't do it then he has an excuse to leave and be a weekend dad. While he may not be the best husband, my kids love him and I don't want to deprive them of their father in the home. Marriage is very complicated sometimes.

[@RT-qz5ci]

Woah. I’m sorry to hear that and will pray for you. Sounds like you guys need to talk. He needs to know how you feel if he doesn’t

[@finallymadeit88]

Sounds like u 2 need to talk and maybe some counseling because u repressing is not healthy hun.... praying for u

[@Rosy-u6z]

AND HE IS MUSLIM OMGGG in islam its her right to choose weather she wants to work or not woooow this is insane

[@09kenedy]

Bingo!

[@carlawalker6838]

His wife was wrong for just quitting her job, without letting her husband know her plans. She already knew how he felt about it in the first place. This should have been a conversation before they got married.

[@Veronica-u5x]

Let the women be a stay at home wife. Working and coming home to still have to work. That’s crazy when her man can afford to take care of everything. He want sex…. She could be exhausted from being at work. I’m with her…as long as he is good financially. I don’t care about my kids being in school, that’s my time alone to get things with the house done and tidy…. Get the house ready for the kids and tend to them when they get out without being tired and exhausted. The family gets the best out of mom and wife.

[@naomipetersen1913]

Exactly

[@djhona_againstthegrain]

I am at home because I was injured at work. I prefer to work. However, during my healing, my husband saw how the home was being taken care of more, food was cooked, I was able to focus on school, and be home when the kids came home; not to mention when the kids have issues or events at school, I am available. Now that I am able to return to the workforce in some capacity, my husband rather me be at home. 😬 I appreciate him wanting me to have freedom to rest and not stress over the hustle and bustle but, we could definitely use the extra income. So we are discussing the options. 🙏🏾

[@martapatterson8896]

The wife’s independent decision, was the same independent decision, the husband made. I told my husband, when we decided to get married, that I was a stay at home mom. Don’t forget those teen years, when there is no home supervision. I considered those the most important years, to guide your child, I saw how difficult it is to stay on top of what choices my children made, all four of them. There are actions, that have life altering effects for them and you. My children were my greatest, and most important job, that God gave me personally. My four children and seven grandchildren are all saved, thank you God.

[@mimismountainhome]

I've heard the whole story before. The husband has a heart condition and the strain of working more hours to cover the lost income, could kill him.

[@LocFitnessMama]

It sounds like the wife needs to log off social media, love her family and her life. If she genuinely desired to be a stay at home wife, she would’ve asked to do so when their children were much younger. Also, the way this economy is setup, she should keep a job 🥴

[@mercedesinspires]

Comprise, and have a conversation about her getting a part-time job. Nonetheless, she was dead wrong for quitting without her husband’s buy in.

[@Dontrolling]

Seems like their could’ve been a compromise and better communication from both parties. If she no longer wanted to work full time she could’ve suggested working part time. She can contribute to both more family time and finances. Or even working from home. But it also seems like he could be dismissive with the “I thought she’d get over it” which she ended up flipping back on him in the end. It was a crucial moment to dig deeper not neglect the conversation because you expect someone to “get over it”. Still not sure how their discussions went but I’m sure it sounds like they just talked AT each other than listen TO each other like a couples that respect each other. Definitely would require more context though.

[@raquelchildofthemosthighgo3546]

God loves Stay at Home Wives ✝️💓

[@katieharrington2845]

Well there you go she grew up as a traditional family of Muslims, she probably just craves for the value of traditional feminity, it sounds like he was already not loving his wife for other reasons other than this. Most men i would of thought would love to have the wife at home with kids, cooking his meals having more energy for intimacy etc 😢

[@iameli_j]

9:55 if you think about it, the children are 9 and 11. Dude is 34… that means he became a dad at 23. He wasn’t ready to be a dad or have to adult/provide for a family. I’m a homemaker (who uses her gifts to increase) and it IS a job and indeed a huge responsibility. 6hrs of an 8hr shift looks like this: 3hrs cleaning, prepping the house for the children. 2hrs to prepare dinner. 1hr to prepare myself for my husband’s return. Now… that’s just a basic schedule. Not even including sports and so on. He needs to grow up and respond to his son as a man. Show his son what a man is. Show his daughter how a woman should be treated if she so desires. But na she shouldn’t have just up and quit her job like that. SMH… pure disrespect Anywho… just a thought or two.

[@angelicabass3755]

You did good on this one and I appreciate you had supportive opinions for both the husband and wife. I 100% agree with all you said

[@raegray8768]

A man not honoring his wife is unbiblical as well. Proverbs 31 was a stay at home and the man loved her and honored her.

[@gisellelee2900]

She was not a stay at home wife she was a business woman and a homemaker.

[@Dessy2023-]

@@gisellelee2900she was not like working women today at all

[@grace.n.godministries]

@2:09 i wanted to know as well. Both of them are out of order. The husband is the head of the home and should vocalize how he felt disrespected. She should have communicated why she wanted to leave her job. Two becomes one flesh ! How can to walk together unless they agree. Both need to apologize, get marriage counseling !

[@demimiller3756]

I think there is a lot to do at home and for yourself as a mom even if your kids are in school, I stayed at home with the children from 2015-2023, It was a lot of work, I also homeschool, until 2023. Being a stay at home mom, you have home school activities, appointments, clean, cook, meal prep, and so much more, Plus as a mom you are a person as well, as a mom you need to be extremely healthy, to do all the task you do everyday. I am wondering if he is upset that she will be home and he doesn’t like that idea ? Or maybe he needs the money ? There are many ways she can also make money at home. While she is home she can come up with different ideas. I think it is such a gift for a husband to allow his wife to stay at home.

[@thejandoshow]

the only caveat i would add to what Nick said is that biblically a wife is supposed to take care of the home first, but not only. I completely agree with asking God about what to do and also the idea of seasons.

[@lwghj1976]

My wife wants to work but if one day she wants to stay at home, glory be to God, I would gladly provide for my family

[@humblejoy3564]

our world is so extreme that it's nice and refreshing to hear a calm biblical perspective 🙏

[@cathyc1730]

I was a stay at home mom and was a product of one. It made all the difference in my life. I grew up knowing I was safe, loved and cared about well. Mom was always there, so important. I’m not 100% sure my husband was all for it in the beginning, but we did talk about it and I did stay home. I believe it served my children well. I have zero regrets, best time of my life! No doubt!

[@srwessentials8924]

He doesn’t love her

[@danadkins5374]

Im on the Man's side in that, for her to quit her job without talking to him, withholding sex as a punishment and basically telling him to deal with it, is immature and wrong. But HE is wrong in that right now He has ZERO biblical legal grounds for divore, the ONLY way he should even CONSIDER THAT is if she cheated on him or was abusive to Him but even THEN, God would prefer them to SEEK HIM for restoration.

[@aryannjohnson2551]

In my opinion both of them are playing selfishly and if they don’t come to a compromise then they might just divorce…the Bible talks about compromises in marriage

[@CloutOG]

Malachi 2:16 - For I hate divorce, says the LORD the God of Israel

[@pedrooliver7218]

thats the thing it was never going to be a mutual decision.. he was not going to agree with her.. pride is going to send alot of people to hell..

[@janeiheme]

The best words i have heard from this young man. 'when naking a home there is no timeframe'. Thank you.

[@EthanPageHunter]

Proverbs 31 is based contextually around a woman that stays home… she runs the household operations and works hard but she still is not working a regular job in society. The Proverbs 31 wife pours her life into her HOME. Thats the context of society during the time. The correlation today would be a wife that stays home, and runs that house like a business.

[@gisellelee2900]

Proverbs 31 Woman is a business woman and a homemaker. She makes sure her family is well taken care of while buying investment properties, making closets, she does charity etc. lots of stay at home moms does this in today’s society. They homeschool their children, start a business etc. nothing is wrong being at stay at home moms but what are you staying home for/to do , because that doesn’t not mean the stay at home mom should be idle.

[@EthanPageHunter]

@ I agree completely. My wife is a stay at home and raises our children. I couldn’t do what she does.

[@ezda-j9p]

Ty for sharing this....really open my eyes and appreciate my husband more🥹 Not all couples have the same problem. It doesn't mean I saw something on social media that portrays a wife it doesn't mean it has to be us.

[@tinaelert2865]

So, if the guy divorces her then she'll have to go out and work, so he'll get his way. He will then proceed to find a new woman who works, but may find out that woman isn't faithful or she's controlling or just bad news. He will discover that he broke up his family, put his wife thru a struggle, and the whole time he had enough money... now he's no further ahead and she's working without him and the kids question their father about what mom did wrong since she was always cooking and cleaning and didn't appear to do anything wrong. And dad will realize he blew up his family's lives at the same time realizing that some other men might be OK with her not working and that she can love them instead, or make it on her own. He will continue scouting for better women and the kids will remain closer with their mom. He's on the devils path

[@larissaalcorn3406]

My mom didn't NEED to stay home. But she did. And every time we were sick, there was no stressing about who would leave work. When we got home from school, she was there. She made all our meals from scratch. She was a room mom in our classrooms. She wasn't cleaning for 6 hours a day. She was simply free to do everything to make our lives lighter.

[@jennypalayatha2346]

U know in this day and age its really sad that this husbnd doesnt c the absolute blessn that he has in his wife that she wnts to be a homemakr 4 their family and als since he is financially comfrtable it really doesnt make sense to me im a homemakr and i thnk God everyday 4 affording me this blessn! In a marriage everythn shud be mutually decided but thats the only thing thats wrong here.

[@jellieloveee]

I know this is of topic but I love the plain tee ! I love good quality fabric tees

[@iamlamogi]

As a woman who is still grieving divorce, I wouldn't wish it anyone's marriage.

[@LynnJ0204]

My aunt worked, but my uncle covered all the household expenses. She invested her entire income, allowing her to later fund her grandchildren's college education, pay for cars and homes in cash, and maintain financial independence long after my uncle passed away. If possible, I believe this approach is ideal. A man should care about how his family would survive in his absence and take care of them while he’s alive.

[@ladyCY413]

Never heard of the term tradwife. I had to pause the start of the video just to look it up… sounds like a word social media came up with.

[@Prayerwarriormama2]

She is wrong for doing that without him being on board. He is wrong for straight divorcing her for that. She is wrong for watching videos and envying others lives. He is wrong for not seeing a value of her not working as much. Maybe she could have got something part-time and shared how serious she was about it. She shouldn’t use sex to her advantage. We are tired though. Working and taking care of the home. It’s exhausting. I stayed home when my kids were little and I was happier and a better wife and Mom. More able to be a helpmeet to my husband. Seek The Lord in all things, and pray. We are in need of Him leading us to what’s best, and not social media or our flesh. 🙏🏻

[@EthanPageHunter]

Not biblical grounds for divorce at all.

[@davena4Jesus]

Nick with the well hold on had me. I approve of this message (it wasnt nick i had to rerind)😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💯👏👏👏

[@Heymrsj]

What about Titus 2:3-5 (ESV)?? " Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, WORKING AT HOME, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."

[@SBrown-ee8gz]

For him to jump to divorce means there's a history of disrespect. Men thrive of being respected. It's hard to honor your wife when the disrespect is so high and your punished with no sex Because you won't put up with disrespectful decisions or attitudes. Then Christian husbands suffer even harder because they are expected to serve and love our wives like Christ loves the church.this looks like always seeking peace even though you know you right and not reacting negatively to the disrespect and forgiving quickly. Only men understand how hard this is from all coultures

[@Opinions567]

Him forcing her to work is just as bad as him forcing her to stay at home.

[@CarleneMcLean-Roberts]

Another classic example of, "if he wanted to, he would". He does not want to provide for his family, eventhough he has the means to do it. He does not see the value of a fulltime housewife.

[@lindsaypeek63]

Good thing she saw what he really wanted her for. Labor. Men who love their wives want them to be feeling cared for , safe, being soft and flowing. She obviously felt like her life needed this

[@lilymorejon647]

I have been a business woman since the age of 25. It has allowed me to step back and raise my children, actually being there for them, to not rely on electronics, and actually be there for them. I have 4 children. 3 of them are already 15 and 16, and the youngest is 9. It makes a lot of difference when we are home for them and with them. All 4 of them are homeschooled. And it doesn't matter that they are older, they need their mommas at every age. Small child, small problem. Big child, big problem. I always say, if you can stay home, then do it. My husband and I own and work the same business together, all glory is given to the most high Yah, as He has made that provision for us to be able to do it. I would always choose, to stay home and be there for my kids, only way I wouldn't, is if I simply couldn't afford it. Be blessed everyone.

[@yorkshireman1794]

What a sad excuse for a marriage.