'Out of Control' | by Ajahn Brahm

Often we assume that if we are NOT 'in control', things will go wrong. So we attempt to control our mind, our body and the people we associate with.
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The dharma talks recorded by the Buddhist Society of Western Australia at Dhammaloka Buddhist Centre in Perth, Western Australia. More resources are available at www.dhammaloka.org.au
The Buddha said, "Craving leads to suffering and letting go leads to peace."
Craving to control and to instil fear in people does not always produce the outcomes that were originally intended.
Ajahn Brahm encourages us to open the door of our heart; to place freedom, trust, respect, kindness and compassion in others and ourselves. Often this will yield outcomes opposite to what we imagine as 'out of control'.

[@123chandimal]

Ajan Brahm / like a mother,like a father, like a friend

[@AWAYTOCHANGE]

Another way of letting go is having no expectations. You may want something to happen but the key is not expecting them to happen. Things never happen the way we think they will happen anyways. By not having an expectation, the things that do happen become a gift. Thank you Ajahn Brahm

[@jajavega]

I like how Ajahn Brahm is so realistic about how it is to be a human being. He understands our nature and helps explain how to be compassionate to ourselves and to others. I like his jokes too!

[@tamistone2632]

when I followed the words of Christ, I realized that that teaching is very Buddhist. So I had no problem just picking up this philosophy. I find these talks really help me

[@noonespecial4171]

There's all kind of wrong there. The Buddha taught Dhamma 2567 years ago, your Jesus arrived 500 years later and no Buddhism is not a philosophy

[@avinandac]

One of the most beautiful, insightful talk I have ever heard.... I know it's going to change my life ❤

[@sherryfortune]

make that a heart for Ajahn Brahm!

[@soulschool1]

Its so great ive got 10 years of brahmy to catch up on.

[@gfxlab]

I can relate to this man more than any other. I appreciate your talks Ajahn Brahm!

[@alex630710]

usally i watch a youtube video and it s enough but oddly enough I can listen over and over the same videos when it come to Ajan Brahm,s speeches

[@PossessWithin]

Ajahn Brahm, i love you, thanks for changing my life.

[@LunaLu-00]

"Stop trying to climb the tree of life, sit underneath it, open the door to your heart and happiness, freedom and peace will fall into it" :) (stop trying to control !!)

[@mariekung9109]

When I first heard Ajahn Brahm I thought he does not act like a monk. As I continued to listen to him I realized that this was the type of Dharma talk is exactly what I needed to hear. I have received much peace, truth, and understanding of myself and other's.

[@saifuddinueo]

Thanks (from Bangladesh )

[@MrHellokittycat]

this channel has helped me so much, thank you, you will never know how much you have inspired change and encouraged me out from my own destructive devices.....:')

[@riteshshaw8582]

Sadhu Sadhu Saaaaaadhuuu ❤️

[@lusl1094]

Thank you Ajahn Brahm _()_ With metta.

[@niksnic86]

Bless u

[@afshin9]

From the time when i get to know you , when i feel down just i listen to you , love you dearly

[@2211indy]

YOUR WISDOM AND HUMOR HAS IMPACTED MY LIFE IN A VERY POSITIVE WAY~

[@WEERAESHAN]

Rule one rules the life, world: you must be compassionate.

[@clearskymind]

Like this teaching a lot. Makes sense. No one wants to be around control freaks who tries to manipulate with fear.

[@iheartLouis1]

listening to Ajahn Brahm makes me happy

[@SigEpBlue]

Somehow, Ajahn Brahm comes up with the perfect talk to give, for everything going on at that time in my life, almost every time I've listened to him. This week has been frustrating, to put it lightly, and most of the efforts have been (uselessly) put into control over things. Letting go, and leading through encouragement and inspiration, would make things MUCH easier on all of us. Thank you so much for reminding us all! :)

[@netrebkocallasmias]

he goes awesome all the time... I'm so glad we have this great talks....

[@123chandimal]

What a Beautiful talk Ajan Brahm.Your talks are really impressive.You have very good understand about human feelings and problems.That's why I listened to u r talks rather than radio chanting. IF my parents can understand these talks ..o.How worth it.They sacrifice their whole life to make our lives more comfortable.They are Buddhist But they have poor attitudes about Buddhism as many lay people in our country. I want to put my parents lives in safe place Thank you.

[@guyneo]

I have always like Mr. Monk's talk. I always gained useful and practical insights from his wonderful talk. 99.9 % of the talk is very wonderful. I only have issue with the last part about the abused wife. I am a father and have a daughter. Personally, I think if there is any form of abuse whether emotional or physical, the wife should be kind to herself and leave the abuser. I refused to accept that if you take sufficient abuse the abuser will change!

[@nickupton1067]

Fantastic Ajahn Brahm _/\_

[@Anupam19781]

Yes, that's it. Been trying to put it into words so I could make a meaningful comment, but "makes me happy"says it perfectly. Thank you.

[@peterantonio1986]

Thank you for this talk. Peter

[@videnz2664]

in my whole life no matter what i did i never found happiness or peace recently i came to the conclusion that there is nothing i can do to achive that and if "doing" dosent work maybe "to do nothing" works just "letting things be how they are and dont try to change it"... and what should i say it really works better then everything i could do... i feel so free to dont have to do anything or control anything to be happy... all day long i thought and looked on youtube what to do to be happy i was trying so much and its the "trying" that makes me unhappy... i was just not able to accept a single moment how it was always trying to change things and the funny thing is i dont have to change anything cause it changes anyways the things dont need help to change they just do it and if not fine i cant do anything about it anyways so why should i make me unhappy by fighting against something thats unbeatable there is nothing i can do to be happy sounds bad but tbh its the best thing ever... if i cant do anything then that only means i dont have to do anything to be happy or peaceful... xD i know its crazy but its so easy atleast for me it works... and by understanding this i first accept my surrounding... well it dont worked that good... still had the need to change something in myself cause i was still depressed... but then i thought wait a minute i dont need to change my thoughts and feelings cause in the past that never worked too... so i just let them be and they calm down in a fucking minuten im fucking free now... it was that easy u really cant do anything to be happy that a really good news... the best news ever... cause doing never leads to full real peace what ever u fight against outside or inside give it up cause u cant change a damn thing u dont have to do anything just let it be its pointless to do something to get happiness cause it dosent work just ask yourself if u ever had real happiness or peace by doing something tbh most times u try to do something about it u make it worse

[@solomos8521]

Thank you!

[@jessicarobb5294]

I wish i could express my love and gratitude for you. Listening to you has brought me such happiness.

[@bgoodfella7413]

Excellent teaching! How could any sane person thumbs down this???? Must be fundamentalist Christians LOL

[@TonyPrower]

Excellent talk, thanks!

[@CuriousJenJen]

thank you so much for posting

[@bbentertain6897]

Very clear and full of power

[@shadow-mo1rr]

thank you so much guys,..

[@Saltyseabog1]

Yeh. For me, the feeling that self dependence brings is a great refuge. No longer the thing to which bad and good happen - just the happening

[@daveyork0]

I stayed at his monastery near Serpentine in WA, just for a weekend, in March last year. If Carps (Carpel) is still there I hope he's well and if he went back to where he has family in Melbourne I'm trusting all's for the best. Also to Daniel and Richard and the anagarikas, Bhantes and Ajahns at Bodhingaya from David in Sydney.

[@DJ-vh2uh]

i love it .....

[@Ravelmoore]

I needed to hear this thanx

[@TheJGGangster]

@James Hoey: Just note and recognize the controle. See the controle when you are controling, that way you are mindfull of the controling. You need some effort to be mindfull because your mind is used to wander. After some time your mind will be more used to being mindfull and being mindfull will be less difficult. So a little controle is not bad, deciding to meditate is also controling, but in buddhism, this is called right effort. I hope I helped you, much Metta!

[@yharyhar8]

"he goes awesome all the time...." couldn't have said it better...:)

[@adnanp88]

Excellent talk :-)

[@amkushala]

thanks

[@Saltyseabog1]

yes, things seem poised somehow. i think its true of ourselves too - if we practice day to day we are marching toward a great ending of a sort.

[@LunaLu-00]

"LOVE YOURSELF FOR WHO YOU ARE." :)

[@Saltyseabog1]

Satisfaction of desire is pretty temporary, it will just come back. Truly ending suffering means ending desire permanently.

[@AvarusRex]

Click the BuddhistSocietyWA button above the video, and you'll see a link on the right for the live video streaming.

[@kirikodu1]

all warm and fuzzy inside :D

[@tintrach]

Yeah, I'm with you on the leaving the abuser. I see my time here in this life as too valuable to spend being abused on any level by anybody.

[@DarkDragonWing]

This is like our good Karma from the past life. haha :D

[@joelmichon1237]

Hi, I suffer from severe anxiety disorder which causes a constant feeling that I'm dying. Not just a worry but an actual feeling. As a result I'm constantly trying to find proof of an afterlife to eliminate the major cause of the disorder. So many articles assuring an afterlife existence, so many saying that anyone believing in such things are mutters. Can anyone help? I don't want to die into eternal nothingness, and I don't want the concept dominating my life anymore!

[@robthenorm]

hello joel. my names rob. I would like you to consider this. the universe is 13 billion years old according to science and that is a very long time, do you remember this being a long time to wait to live this life? when you die unless science comes up with a better answer to death you will not experience eternal nothing or eternal everything. you will have no memory to have so there will be no darkness. no time. the living will experience time. so you may ask will you live again? that process will be the instant you are truly dead no time, no worry. you may ask what if you never live again. i answer with, the universe is not a time limit as it continues to tick along like a clock with no hour markings it changes a lot as after all it took super novas of stars exploding to create carbon and there are over 200 billion earth like planets at any one time. but you have found love on this planet and want to stay like a toad in a well who thinks his well is the best i would never want to leave. i ask you to learn to accept your fear of death, this is impossible to do because he is the monster sitting on the throne and you want him gone. listen to the buddah and know your not alone in this thought of fear and to understand this very important last bit. stop thinking of death, that is the destination, live in the moment and try to enjoy everything around you. don't think of the destination its not where you are right now.

[@TheDakra]

Thx!

[@TheDakra]

robthenorm thx!

[@Saltyseabog1]

Actually, we just need to push against the flow of desire a little bit. The practice is not to battle desires, which is a fruitless struggle. Instead we investigate the mind to find satisfaction which is not dependent on gratifying desires. The more of this peace and joy you realise, independent of worldly things, the more the mind will naturally let go and desire less world things. Coz it just feels better - cause and effect.

[@MrFrost227]

I have this foolish ambition/ pipe dream of trying to reach this fellow by telephone. I mean, I am quite sure that if I attempted to place a call to the BSWA that I would be able to chat with SOMEONE. But for some strange reason I have something that I really just want to talk to Ajahn Brahm specifically about. I don't know why. It's probably utterly impossible for that to happen, but maybe one of these days I will try anyway.

[@jamesehoey]

I totally understand the benefits of letting go. I know that meditation or mindfulness allows for one to learn how to let go. In my life I automatically try and and control everything, so I try to meditate as it has helped me in the past, but when I try and be mindful it just turns into more control, I cant seem to get passed it or work with it. Any advice?

[@Saltyseabog1]

perhaps, but you can still manage it in this life of that i am reasonably sure

[@Saltyseabog1]

it's a good experiment :D

[@Saltyseabog1]

sadhu

[@yharyhar8]

Ajahn is the funniest buddhist of all time.

[@WEERAESHAN]

which web address is used for the live streaming?

[@Saltyseabog1]

well, not necessary to think whether to go forth or not - if u keep up ur practice that is the most important thing. A monks life without practice is useless, a layman's life with practice is well lived.

[@ccroney00]

Are there any important holidays and traditions of your religion?

[@Saltyseabog1]

Yes, practice for release. If you practice well, then actually going forth or renunciation of wordly desires will happen naturally. Seeing all phenomena as empty, what is there to cling to?

[@shadow-mo1rr]

do you know where a buddhist temple is here in redlands?

[@LennyLentil]

0:35:45 Look at your partner and say " The only rule which I have that I want you to keep is that: I be kind to and you be kind to me."

[@audreystrong1102]

Curious whether Ajahn Brahm knows Wirapol Sukphol?

[@lordbyron3603]

So, Do you still play the guitar AB?? 🙃

[@221Dw]

I would have thought the death rate went down because it wasnt being recorded.

[@ClipsForGames]

:)

[@jparryprodeal]

WHAT HAPPEN TO YR CAMERA IS SO OUT OF FOCUS

[@bala5984]

jparryprodeal that's just one bad brick in the wall^^

[@sherryfortune]

-3

[@veganath]

Ajahn Brahm - "Stop controlling people" ....haha

[@stevetobias]

Just saying, your understanding isn't correct. A monk is requested to give a teaching, otherwise they won't. Then some students go through the trouble to shoot it, then edit it, then upload it. Then there is a video on KZbin, which 7 years ago wasn't possible. Therefore you/we are the lucky ones, not Ajahn Brahm, who is already in bliss.

[@stevetobias]

Ajahn Brahm isn't "lucky," you're the one with the merit/karma to listen to him.