Over 60, living alone, and not liking it?

[@nana73carol46]

I'm 76 and a widow for 7 years. No pets. I often don't utter a word in a day. Yes, it's repeat, repeat, repeat. Going out to eat alone is no fun, so I don't do it often. Dealing with this is wearing me down mentally and physically. Some of us need companionship more than others. After being married 51 years to a loving husband and sharing life on a daily basis it is so difficult.

[@nigella4me]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. I agree, some of us do need companionship more than others and it DOES wear you down mentally and physically. Living alone has literally changed my view on so many things in life. Finding joy in simple things is much harder for me now because I know that joy is momentary, then it's back to living alone with myself and my dogs. Living alone can be extremely difficult and hard to get through. Sending you lots of love and strength. ❤

[@mariamontalvo3020]

M 69 yrs. I had a near death accident, lived alone for 5 r more yrs. Ioved it...but after my accident, I didn't want to live alone, one of my twin boys asked me to join them, I said no at first then when my daughter inlaw asked me, I said yes. We have been together for over one r two yrs. It's wonderful. She's a great cook, she asked for my help yesterday, it feels good to be needed. (I only cooked the tortillas) I love life. Praise to GOD, I also serve God...I leave Scriptures & speak to people...what a wonderful life...spouse deceased in 2013. I only have HBP.

[@nigella4me]

You are so lucky to be living with your son and his wife and not be all alone. I'm happy that's working out for you. Boy do I miss my mom's homemade tortillas, she made them SO good. 😊

[@nana73carol46]

@@nigella4me Thank you, you understand. Many do not.

[@mariamontalvo3020]

Please do go out to eat, know how hard it might be, start talking to strangers just for a little bit...May GOD BLESS YOU IN JESUS NAME.

[@d.e.taylor6880]

I've never heard or talked to anyone who relates exactly as you do...and you do get it to a tee.

[@nigella4me]

Thank you! I DO get it, believe me. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with.

[@daisy1757]

Another excellent video! Thank you for bringing awareness and empathy to this issue. I find loneliness seems to come and go. Some days it's front and center and on others it fades into the background. I am glad I like my own company or else it would be unbearable!

[@Hetal28]

Sending hugs for you 🤗 Loneliness is becoming like a pandemic It’s everywhere in the youth , middle age , old age

[@nigella4me]

It truly is an epidemic now. People are no longer connected like they were decades ago and it's truly affecting our lives in many areas. Sending hugs right back at you. 😊

[@elenagreen4441]

Even if you took a class you will still feel alone. It's the worse feeling that destroys your soul. Thank you for talking about this

[@nigella4me]

You are right, it destroys your very soul, it destroys your will, it destroys the ability to find joy in the simplest things. It's a very difficult journey.

[@patriciawitt8174]

Thank you for talking about this. I thought I was the only one that felt this way. Like you said, so many people say "I'd love to live alone, have some privacy" that I thought there must be something wrong with Me, cuz I think this sucks. My husband died suddenly and unexpectedly a few years ago and i STILL go to the garage to tell him something I saw, heard, read ❤ i just found your channel a couple days ago and i have only watched a few of your videos, but I like them/you.

[@nigella4me]

I'm so sorry about your loss. I know what you mean about going to tell him something. It's a habit that's hard to lose when you've been with someone daily. Thank you so much for being here, and there's NOTHING wrong with you, it's a real problem, and I hope you get through your hardship somehow, it isn't easy. ❤

[@waynemartelli]

I have been living alone for much of my adult life, and I am now living alone at age 66. I find myself on both sides of this issue. There are times when being alone feels lonely, and there are times when being alone feels liberating. I’m fine with having only a few close friends, which I do. Most of our interactions are on the phone, but I do see friends occasionally. I think embracing being alone is better than fighting it at every turn. Sometimes we have to redirect our feelings from negative to positive, enjoy the beauty of nature around us and find opportunities when we are out and about to connect with people. Even superficial connections can be uplifting when delivered with a positive attitude and a smile. Ultimately, we are all responsible for our own lives, and for most of us there are opportunities we can apply to improve them and add to our happiness.

[@THF409]

I been living alone for 29 years. I’m a widower 71 year old and retired, my wife died in 1995. I also have poor eyesight don’t drive and consider legally blind. I don’t have any children or grandchildren. I don’t fit in at church because all the people my age are married. I live a very isolated life with no visitors, family etc. l know how it is being lonely and isolated and doing things by yourself.

[@nigella4me]

I understand, believe me. I don't think the majority of us were meant to live alone.

[@sandraalegria3439]

I'm always alone, I'm 59 and feel no energy , have no purpose , really feel like my best years are behind me.

[@nigella4me]

I know what you mean, it's like, "what am I here for anymore?" When the loneliness hits me hard, it feels like someone literally pulled the plug on my energy and my body just kind of shuts down. Having another person's energy around actually helps our energy stay "active" if you will. We literally emit energy from our bodies and when someone is around us we feel their energy, and then they leave, you can actually feel the energy leave with them. Hang in there, I try to tell myself I'm still here for a reason. 😊

[@Mmmmkaaay]

I love living alone. I do what I want, when I want. If I want social interaction, I go out. I lived with a man for 17 years and I don't miss it, except for the safe, regular sex. But at 49, I could solve that by finding a companion to hang out with once a week. I suggest everyone get a pet, because they do offer health benefits. If you're suffering, get a roommate, go to meetups, travel,take classes,sing karaoke, ,etc. Any one who has been divorced knows that you can be lonely even with someone sleeping next to you. Lonely is a mindset.

[@nigella4me]

I have to disagree about loneliness being a mindset. You may love living alone and that's fine for you, but many people don't for various reasons. All the things you mentioned to do are things people suffering with loneliness have heard a million times, but they don't to the core of the loneliness of living alone. I'm glad you love living alone, but it's not for everyone.

[@9Ballr]

@@nigella4me Of course it's not for everyone, but judging by your responses to those who say they like living alone you want to dispute that. Believe me, some people (like myself) are much more content and happy living alone.

[@Starfish2145]

Then this channel isn’t for you

[@Mmmmkaaay]

@@Starfish2145 Any channel is for me if it's offered on YT. Stop gatekeeping. 🙄

[@nicesamuel879]

I love living alone too

[@seamusconlan9673]

Whenever I feel deep loneliness I try to be grateful for the fact that I'm not homeless in prison or disabled thankfully. Better to be alone then to be alone with the wrong person. Life is difficult once you accept that life is difficult somehow it becomes easier to accept from the book "The Road Less Travelled". Wishing you peace and good company.

[@Gary-Seven-and-Isis-in-1968]

"alone with the wrong person" that rings a bell. Wise words indeed. 👍🏼

[@nigella4me]

That's what I do to. I focus on all that I DO have and what I have to be grateful for, and it helps a lot. But yes, I don't want to be with the wrong person, no thank you! Thank you for being here. 😊

[@Tammy.50]

Thank you ❤

[@nigella4me]

You're very welcome!

[@anoldhag]

Yes, thank you so much for this video …Just know that you are not alone. I hope we get to see more videos (if you feel up to it) in the future (If not we understand, of course). I have been a subscriber for a long time and have missed your chats. I wish there was a way to converse with you, but I didn’t notice any in your about section. Just know that you have a friend here! 😊

[@nigella4me]

@@anoldhag Thank you for being a subscriber, I appreciate it very much. I will be doing more videos on many subjects. Know that you have a friend in me too.😊We've gotta stick together somehow in life. BTW, love your screen name. LOL!

[@joshuaS1117]

I’m 32 and going through this now. It’s the mundane suffering realm of Groundhog Day.

[@nigella4me]

That's a very good way to put it. It is like the same day over and over and over.

[@lindybright1938]

This is interesting for me, because I'm childfree and people will usually tell me that I will end up alone, but it actually doesn't matter if you have children because the same applies to people who have raised children. Thank you for sharing this, I've found it to be very helpful for my particular circumstances.

[@nigella4me]

You're welcome! 😊

[@suzannegray7859]

Thank you for this video. Living alone sucks. I just try everyday to get through this. All I need is a friend to talk with.

[@nigella4me]

I understand, believe me, it DOES suck for those of us who don't like it. Living alone goes against the majority of people's way that they want to live. I've noticed in the people that I know that do live alone, a kind of sadness in their eyes, even if they say they like living alone. There's just something there in their eyes that says otherwise.

[@patriciamurtagh7998]

Thank you so much for this honest and fulsome talk. I identify with everything you say.

[@Wickedcorrupt]

Nights are the worst. Ruminating constantly about the man I left. Doubting myself etc. Thanks so much!❤

[@nigella4me]

Yes, nights are SO very hard. The mind just starts spinning about so many things and there's no one there to take your mind away from those thoughts. Take care and I hope things get better for you.

[@kcblea]

I have to agree with this, it's only been within the last couple of months I've thought more about this. The depression can be exhausting, and I'm not proud to admit the videos with couples, and the happiness they express has made me roll my eyes...lol. This channel has got to be a good outlet for you i hope. Take care.

[@nigella4me]

I can't even watch videos or movies anymore with the "happy couples," makes my stomach turn. LOL! Yes, it's all very exhausting. Hope you have better days ahead and thank you for being here. 😊

[@margueritemullarkey1866]

Boy,your not kidding especially now with fall and winter closing in and less daylight.Been married twice widowed both times,and honestly never been alone my whole life.Threr yrs. a widow now,was in a 9 month relationship,but had to break it off. On line dating apps.are a joke,sometimes a nightmare. Funny how nobody knows anybody to introduce us to.Just keep on keeping,keep your ❤ heart open,and I will never give up hope and neither will you. God bless!😊

[@nigella4me]

@@margueritemullarkey1866 Thank you! Yes, online dating is a freaking nightmare. I'll never do that again. I would LOVE to meet the "right" guy for a change, maybe one day. Living alone is truly a challenge. Take care and stay strong, it's all we can do. 😊

[@cindybarton8562]

Working never filled the void and can actually make it worse for me!! The is a freedom with not being married, but loneliness can be the trade off. Then again alot of married people are isolated from one another and that is possibly just as bad. Sending kindness and strength prayers/vibs to every lonely soul!!

[@bubblesartgallery5081]

I’m a single empty nester for the last 6 months. I’m mostly ok. I love not having responsibilities of having to cook or do anything but I do want friends , it’s just hard to meet people when you get older

[@nigella4me]

That's the one good thing about living alone, not having to cater to anyone for anything, that part I do love. But for some like me, that's just not enough to compensate for the loneliness. And yes, it's hard to make friends when you're older. You meet someone, think they're gonna be a great friend, and then realize you're just not compatible or they're just not a "good" friend after all. It's a journey in so many ways.

[@bubblesartgallery5081]

@@nigella4me my son moved out about 6 months ago & every day at 530, when he would normally come home, I get down. I’ve had to create a new routine so I’m not home at 530…

[@nigella4me]

@@bubblesartgallery5081 I can certainly understand that. I still walk by my son's room after over 4 years of him moving out and feel sad even though I've totally changed it in every way. Memories can really get to you.

[@Fer-vq6ru]

So well said, thank you 🙏 I am 67 and what I miss among other things is to have companionship when I go to bed, and I am not talking about sex, is about having someone who will laugh with me or talk about anything tha happened that day. Feeling someone next to me makes a difference. The epidemnic that you speak of is also happening here in the UK. 23 years ago I knew my neighbours, now the new neighbours hardly engage at all, rude teenagers who ignore you even when you are saying hello. It is tough.

[@nigella4me]

I couldn't agree with you more. It's not about sex anymore at my age of 68, it's about companionship. Just knowing that someone who cares about you is there. I dream of having someone to just cuddle up with to talk, laugh, cry with and just do everyday things with. Life now IS tough!

[@coleenkulaw1447]

Thank you for your honesty, not looking forward to this living alone.

[@nigella4me]

You're welcome. It definitely isn't easy all the time. It's been a challenge for me but I keep moving forward. I just believe that most, but not all people need people around them. Sending you lots of hugs and strength. 😊

[@exlesoes]

I'm 33 and going through things but I'm alone which is difficult I never married and have no kids... I miss my parents house 😢 lol it's tearing me up but I'll never have that comfort again Anyway, I do like focusing on education whether mental, knowledge (gaining it), and other maybe spiritual, but educating myself online. I try to do that to make me feel fulfilled outside of what I plan on doing work wise.

[@manos_halki]

I divorced my ex-husband in 2021 after 2 years of marriage, 10 years dating off and on, and went no contact. He was emotionally and financially abusive. When I reflect objectively, I know he was a predator. He died suddenly the week before Christmas last year and as we get closer to Christmas I know it will be hard. I'm so glad to hear that someone understands that sometimes, you do miss the good times. Like you, I don't miss him. I miss the partnership/family situation. I actually enjoy being alone, but being alone with your own thoughts for too long can cause your mind, like you said, to go to those places. So glad you're back on KZbin. I've missed you!

[@iww6994]

For you😉🌷💐

[@nigella4me]

So glad you're here. Christmas was always my favorite time of year, not so much now with living alone. I imagine it will be hard for you and I'm so sorry. Sending you hugs ❤

[@caram2422]

In our 60s our lives are about losses. Loss of working life, loss of people who have passed, loss of the hopes and dreams of youth, loss of the days gone by and the things I used to look forward to. Grieving these things is what makes me feel alone. I think the work of getting older is holding and processing the grief.

[@Back-handedLuck-ul7ms]

@caram2422 - I agree with you. As I approach my 70's, I feel like my life is one big accommodation to loss. Spouse, friends, relatives, health. The hardest thing is not having much to look forward to except much of the same.

[@caram2422]

@@Back-handedLuck-ul7ms I have also lost a partner and it really changes who you are. Looking forward to the future is now a thing of the past. I’m gradually accepting that life is about ‘now’ and inviting the little things that bring solace such as listening to favourite music and chatting to neighbours or even shop assistants. People don’t realise that between you and the ‘future’ there is a space that needs to be filled with being.

[@nigella4me]

I couldn't agree with you more. We think of the life that once was and has passed by and sometimes that is very hard.

[@nigella4me]

I'm sorry for your loss. You're right, that space needs to be filled but it just doesn't always happen and that is hard to deal with. Sometimes I'll go to the store just to fill a little time and talk to other people. I'm learning to live in the present and not worry so much about the future.

[@caram2422]

@@nigella4me I know what you mean. It’s not easy at all. I hope I didn’t sound parsimonious. It does help knowing that I am not the only person experiencing life this way.

[@AmbrosiaK]

I had a friend who lived alone and suffered terribly. Admittedly I was the 'fix it person' and wanted to give advice. She would say, just listen and try to understand that's all I what. She died at 60 and the family never fully disclosed the reason. I wish I had another chance to just listen.

[@nigella4me]

I'm so sorry about your friend. You did what you thought was right at the time, but now you know that sometimes a person just needs an ear to listen and show empathy and compassion, and maybe can help someone else in the same situation in the future. I don't know what happens after we die, but maybe just talk to her and let her know how you feel, maybe she'll hear it and it will bring her comfort.

[@AmbrosiaK]

@@nigella4me Thanks for your kind reply Nigella. I miss her everyday. Thanks for your kind words

[@cynthia216]

Just communicate with us to,I do struggle living alone,I just turned 65.I'm relating to what you're saying.

[@nigella4me]

It is hard sometimes and sometimes I just miss having someone around. It can truly be a struggle. KZbin is great, getting peoples thoughts can really help. I hope things get better for you. It isn't an easy journey. 😊

[@duckrivermama66]

Thank you for talking about this. I live in a senior building. There are over 80 apartments here. I've tried to befriend a few of the folks. They will turn on you in a heartbeat. There's lots of things to do in this city, but it all costs money. If you are broke, there's nothing to do. If you volunteer, they turn you down, or abuse you. I'm tired of the nonsense. I have a cat who depends on me to take care of him. He is a comfort, but we need human relationships. Relationships, not acquaintances. And yes, the loneliness gets to me.

[@nigella4me]

I hear you. It's a part of life I never thought I'd experience after the life I had when I was married with all my kids. And yes, it's hard to find TRUE friends, not just acquaintances. You think they're your true friend and then they do something that shows they are not. Like they say, if someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them. And that's a hard thing to do when you thought you knew someone. Take care and I'm glad you joined us here. 😊

[@desertbluesplaylist7550]

I understand this completely, well described. I can't have a dog where I live but four pawed pals can be a huge help.

[@janelannan4913]

True loneliness is soul crushing....beyond pain....

[@nigella4me]

I couldn't agree more. We're not supposed to live alone and lonely. Thank you for being here. ❤

[@janelannan4913]

@@nigella4me and you as well....luv light joy and grace from boston

[@willman9567]

I stay busy. I dont give myself a chance to think if I am happy or not. I have a second job at a restaurant. Extra fun money, social time, exercise. I know I will not retire until my health gives out. I would go insane by the isolation.

[@amyw4216]

It makes me sad that so many people may be suffering in this way. Covid shutdowns were eye opening to me revealing how so many struggle with loneliness. I wonder if loneliness is more of an issue for more extraverted personalities?

[@Dimitris-Stasinopoulos]

I believe that we are souls ,constantly evolving.We are here in this time and space in this demension to find our spiritual path to become our true self and become aware of our male and female side. To become feel and think as a whole an iternal unity . Universe is inside us and we are part of the universe .As above so below as someone said . So from my understanding suffering is the key to develop compassion for others and every being .And compassion bring you to awareness then pain starts to fade away . There is no room for suffering . It played its part to your inner growing . I m 35 years old and I ve been alone my whole life till this time As a teenager I couldn t stand it I was like WHY why is this happening to me .Then I came to understand that this was my task . You are a very genuine soul I used to watch your channel from the early beginning I know that you did go through a lot . I hope the best for you in life.You can find friends , love a partner why not . And rememder we have a lot more capabilities It is just our mind .Mind is always fearfull wants to control everything.

[@nigella4me]

Thank you for such an insightful and kind comment. It does feel like a journey, and everyone's is different. And thank you for being here, I do appreciate it. I hope you have a happy holiday season. 😊

[@theoillady6076]

Dimitris is. . . VERY insightful for such a young man.

[@rosesareredvioletsareblue2012]

I always have this fear of being alone.Thanks for talking about it.Oh my Gosh my fear of all time when my 7 years bf left me as things were not going great as he refused to get into commitment and then moving back to my country and falling in love who just physically abused me by taking me to a place ,made my trauma worse ,I always thought something is wrong with me hence failure after failure as I always wanted husband and kids and my home .I have fear of being alone as my mother quite old and ailing but then I have told myself there is nothing I could do but to accept the reality .I can understand what you might be going throught but lots n lots of prayers for you ❤

[@nigella4me]

I too was like you, all I wanted was a happy marriage with a husband, kids, and my own house, but it just didn't turn out that way, that was always my dream. I understand your fear of being alone, it's downright scary for some people. Just be strong, that's all we can do, and thank you for sharing. Take care of yourself!

[@expansefloating4096]

When you are lonely it’s true there are so many things where you begin to think “why bother?”. Why bother to cook a nice meal? Clean? Take care of yourself? Even do hobbies you normally love. Socialization is such an important part of the human experience. If that’s lacking it can cause mental pain and trickle into all these other areas of your life. It poisons the well, almost. But it’s more than just interacting you need to feel seen and understood. All the jobs I’ve had have been working almost nonstop with customers. But if I don’t feel like I’ve had a meaningful conversation, discuss my passions and interests, then I still feel lonely. Laughing with a friend is especially so huge for my mental well being.

[@nigella4me]

Very well said. Loneliness can hit for many reasons. People need people, plain and simple. Without interaction life gets very dull. Hope you have a great and happy New Year. Thanks for being here.😊

[@mjc.1111]

I’m 51 going through a divorce after 20yrs marriage and raising 3 kids. Also experiencing early empty nest. Work gets me out of the house and out of my head but at home I’m tired and lonely. I do enjoy the peace and solitude but I also fight not to fall down the slippery slope of depression. I’m trying to find something to look forward to in my golden yrs. Thank you for being vulnerable. You expressed exactly how I feel. ❤

[@lkern6238]

Im 68, retired. Live in Austin in a 1b1b on the third floor with my 21 yo granddaughter who works full time and is mostly not here. First thing when I wake up, I make a list of things I want to do or need to do. I signed up for daily online precalculus classes, I do art projects and do puzzles. I walk a couple of dogs for my neighbors when needed. I take daily walks on the neighborhood trail listening to music. I go to the local goodwill warehouse to buy books, 5 for 99 cents a couple times a week where I've met many other retirees and book people. I used to walk dogs at the humane society every Sunday for 4 hours (until the covid hit). I make sure I eat only healthy foods. Mostly, I'm grateful I'm alive as my dad died at 40 and mom died at 54. Lastly, I live 100% on social security, which is just enough. I am an introvert and really have no "friends" which is okay.❤❤❤

[@Rayxl1]

I'm over sixty and live alone but as I always have done I don't think anything of it. I like to socialize with other people but find it hard work after a while.

[@nigella4me]

Yes, socializing when we're older can be much more difficult than when we were younger. Life can be very hard.

[@lynne22]

That is very nice to know that someone understands 😢

[@nigella4me]

I do, believe me. Life is truly a difficult challenge sometimes. We just have to fight the bad and look for the good, and a lot of times that just isn't easy. I'm glad you're here. 😊

[@hrbob8349]

I'm alone and lonely

[@nigella4me]

I understand. Living alone can be very lonely sometimes, a lot of the time actually. It's a true challenge that's for sure. I just do my best to keep busy and to focus on what I do have to be grateful for, but it isn't easy. Sending you hugs and strength. 😊

[@hrbob8349]

@@nigella4me the vid really captures the reality of living alone. No sugarcoating. This is one of a kind. I miss my bf. He died few years ago. He was my companion for many years. I'm 48.

[@Mercalons]

We should get together and find a solution to this problem

[@JackLopez-e9k]

You can be alone...but you don't have to be lonely.

[@Julian-pb4lr]

I wish more older women would grow their hair long like you. You look lovely.

[@nigella4me]

Well thank you so very much. I'm not a short hair woman, I like longer hair. I don't know why so many women chop all their hair off when they get older. But I figure everyone has to do what's comfortable for them. Thank you for being here. 😊

[@ptlovelight2971]

So I'm a 38yo female living alone for the first time in my life. But i have a different view of being alone/loneliness than you do, and thats ok. Because i have literally lived with someone for my entire life. All of them were family members. Starting of course, with my parents. But my family and home wasn't a happy one, as yours appeared to be. Lots of trauma amd abuse and neglect that i went through as a kid/teen. I felt very lost and alone in my early 20s after my mom died. My dad never fully recovered, and began to slowly drink himself to death. After he died i was age 27, and I lived with my older sister. I considered her my best friend at the time. But as we got older, i noticed a change in her. Our relationship began to feel more controlling and codependent. She has different views and beliefs than me, and we butted heads a lot. Im also autistic/ADHD, and she truly did not know how to handle that, nor did she seem interested to learn more about it. She instead chose to get angry amd frustrated with me, and just wanted a pill to "fix" me. The final straw was the manipulation around my relationships with other people and my money. I left last year from the home we purchased together; she hasn't spoken to me since. I said all that to say, I absolutely cherish living alone. Because of the horrible living situations i was in my whole life. I now have what i spent many nights crying and praying for: peace and quiet in my home. Ive healed myself from illnesses and ailments i didn't realize were the result of living in such a toxic environment for so long. But it definitely is still hard. So i agree with you there and i sympathize with the struggle. But this? Its a cakewalk compared to the Hell i came from. Ive never felt more lonely and depressed in my life than being in the company of so called family who claimed to love me

[@estherwilliams7005]

I just went to listen to "Dreamer" by Ozzy Osbourne. It is such a beautiful song. Thank you for recommending it. I loved it and never heard of it before. The music video is so cute and goes with the song so well with the little girls dancing in the snow.

[@nigella4me]

You're welcome! Isn't it just the best song and video? I came upon it by accident one day and I was hooked. Of course I love Ozzy but hadn't heard that one somehow. I've watched it a million times I think. LOL! I'm glad you listened to it. It is how I feel about the world, about life. Thank you for being here, I appreciate your kind comment. 😊

[@adamtisch8358]

You have great taste in music. Ozzy!!!;. Huge fan of him black Sabbath gets me through tough times. Been into zak wylde a lot lately too. Amazing how much he sounds like ozzy. Motorcycles my cat and being in the motorcycle industry gets me through this cold and lonely workd. Im 60 been without anyone for 20 years. Sure would like someone to do life with but apparently not in my cards

[@nigella4me]

I love Ozzy! I watch their podcasts every week. That family just makes me laugh. And now I watch Jack's KZbin channel too. I know what you mean. Wish I had someone to share life with too. Was just talking about that with my daughter this morning. But as you say, it just doesn't seem to be in the cards for me. So whatever will be, will be I guess. But I don't like living alone, it's just not for me. I thank goodness for my two little dogs, they mean the world to me. Thanks for being here and I wish you happiness in life. 😊

[@jehouse61]

I have my two kids living here after covid, but that will end soon and I absolutely dread it. I need someone around me or I will go crazy. I'm 62.

[@GuitarType01]

Being the outdoor type, I get depressed when I stay indoors for long periods of time. I enjoy hiking, jogging, swimming, and just overall being active. I got injured two years ago and could not get out and about. It was a rough time for me. I know this video is about living alone, but I generally enjoy spending time by myself, even though I don’t live alone. As long as I am able to do my regular activities, I would be fine living alone.

[@nigella4me]

I used to feel that way too, until I did live alone, then it all changed. Spending time alone and enjoying it while you don't live alone is not the same as living alone daily. I hope you never find out what that's all about. It's not fun for most.

[@GuitarType01]

@@nigella4me That makes sense. This made me think about the future a bit though I don’t want to let it consume me because the future is usually not the way we always imagine it to be (not always). I’m sorry about your situation, nobody deserves to feel that way.

[@TerrieFitzpatrick-dh8is]

I have a cat and dog so I don't feel lonely, but the day I was taking my dog for a walk and I told him "Remind me when we get back home to take my umbrella with me to work", it's been too long.

[@nigella4me]

I get it, believe me!

[@mamashiraz]

Hey lady!! I’ve missed your videos! It’s mama byrd btw. I live with and care for my 14 year old autistic son. I get lonely for a friend with similar interests. Things were hard before the pandemic and the forced isolation made things so much worse. My son now has social anxiety and gets upset when we go out now. He used to love going places but not so much now. We’ve witnessed people being nasty and hateful. People have gone crazy. Having hope in humanity is difficult. We still mask when we go out because I’m on immunosuppressants due to multiple autoimmune disorders so I have to be careful not to get sick. I don’t bother with makeup because I’m masking. I miss putting effort into my appearance. I have SLE and RA and taking a shower at the end of the day is exhausting. I have my daughter and 3 year old grandbaby who I adore! I sometimes have her for the night and I’m worn out the next day🤣 Something I used to do is volunteer work…helping at a soup kitchen or taking donated items to people. Giving back and having a feeling of purpose can help uplift us. And we might meet someone along the way who we connect with. I was in an abusive relationship and vowed never to be bother with a man ever again but I do wish I could find someone who isn’t a nut job but it’s hard at our age. But do I even have the energy for it? I’ve been in counseling for years now and I really like the one I have now…the guy gets paid to listen to me🤣 in all seriousness, right now he’s the only one I have deep conversations with. The world has turned into a very scary place and it’s sad that it’s forced some of us to isolate ourselves so much. But things change. I remember how we first “met” through Bob. Boy did things change. It’s really sad what happened there. But things can change for the better and sometimes we have to make it happen for ourselves because we are worthy and valuable and have a lot to offer. Take care friend🥰

[@nigella4me]

Hi mama byrd, so good to hear from you. Must be so tough for you with your son, my heart goes out to you. I still mask too, I lost most of my hearing in my left ear because of Covid after it settled in my ear, and now I have a hearing aid. Plus, I live alone and getting really sick scares the hell out of me. As for Bob, that is such a strange thing, I still wonder what really happened to him. But I get what you mean, just showering can be exhausting. You take care too, somehow we'll get through. 🥰

[@mamashiraz]

@@nigella4me Sorry to hear about the Covid damage. It’s still floating around so we protect ourselves as much as possible. Bob and his “friend” alienated a lot of long time followers. It’s sad that he took that path.😞

[@nigella4me]

@@mamashiraz Yes, she alienated many of his followers, I was one of them. I truly think he was a very lonely soul and she stepped in and sort of filled that void. Unfortunately she wasn't a good thing that came into his life. I wish his brother would've told us all something about his passing. It's still hard to believe he's gone. And it's strange that his office site is still up with phone number and all. Who knows!

[@tracymorgan5386]

@@nigella4meI’m sorry who’s Bob.

[@nigella4me]

@@tracymorgan5386 He was a psychic on KZbin who passed away with no word to any of his followers from family or anyone about what happened to him.

[@laurazanon4697]

Please try praying to the Blessed Virgin Mary ! She is our heavenly Mother and is able to help , ask her !! Please just try it and you will be amazed❤ She is queen of heaven and earth🙏🧡💒

[@kimdrenth6240]

Wish I could be friends with you. I relate so much!

[@nigella4me]

That would be so nice. It's nice to have someone you can actually relate to. But I' glad you're here online at least. Have a good, happy evening. 😊

[@lisb748]

It is hard, I'm 73 and have been alone now for 2 years. I have 4 children, 2 are disabled and I provide transportation for them when I can . My youngest is fighting a number of auto immune problems and can't visit, my oldest is doing her own thing and rarely calls. I have pets and they are a comfort but I need adult conversation. I used to go places do things , I've tried to just go out and do these by my self but the missing component is sharing the experience. My friend circle has always been small and sadly one by one have passed.

[@micheldawnsummers1452]

I’m retired lived on my own over 10 years now, I do have a little dog, but given up on cooking and have to push my self to go out, not fit enough to go far, my get up and go has gone, I’m ok living alone but just some times would be nice to have company, you need money to go shopping, it’s the depression of every thing has gone and not wanted that’s the killer, my kids don’t live local up come when ever they can, no grandkids to come visit either , but it’s still better than living with some one who it mentally draining , m enthusiasm has left the building

[@nigella4me]

I know what you mean by your get and go being gone and your enthusiasm being gone too. The huge changes in life as we grow older can be very difficult for a lot of people. Living alone is just not a happy way to live for millions of people. Take care of yourself, I know it can be hard. ❤

[@micheldawnsummers1452]

@@nigella4me thank you, yes it’s very hard, not spoken to a sole all day and now it’s time to spend the evening alone again, x

[@nigella4me]

@@micheldawnsummers1452 I know it's not the same, but talk to your dog as if it were a human. I do that sometimes just to keep my sanity, I talk, laugh, and cry with them, I'll even sometimes put on music and dance around with them. My son set up Google Home for me, and I literally talk to her and she talks back. Believe it or not, just hearing the voice from Google helps sometimes. The evenings are SO hard, I know. I've gotten to the point where I pretty much count down the hours until it's time to go to bed, that's now my favorite time of the day, because I know sleep is coming, the only time when I don't think about the loneliness. I snuggle up with my dogs in bed, and I watch Grace and Frankie until I'm ready to fall asleep. I've watched the series a million times, the familiarity of the same show every night allows my mind to rest. Plus, I like seeing what Grace and Frankie go through as single women after years of marriage. If you were my neighbor or friend here, we'd be getting together a lot. I know your pain well.

[@micheldawnsummers1452]

@@nigella4me haha yes I talk to my dog floss as well, she’s only tiny but boy if she could talk, I have seizures and she washes my face and snuggles me till I’m round again, I should be use to being alone really as my ex worked away all the time but you knew some one was going to phone and come home, but I worked full time then so met lots of people, I could go out every night as I know a lot of people here but just don’t want to go, thought being retired would be fun x

[@nigella4me]

There is a difference in being alone all the time, and being alone for awhile, yet knowing someone is coming home. When my youngest son was living with me, I was very happy and fulfilled until it was clear he needed to get out on his own. If I had it my way, I'd have it like I've seen a lot of videos of sons living with their mom so the mom is not alone. But, that's not my life. So now where I live, it's after 4pm and the evening is closing in again which means trying to get through another lonely evening and night. It really is a tough time in life. Hope you're doing alright.

[@Tammy.50]

How to make like minded friends in the neighborhood. Get together and share some times together and do things together 😊

[@Tammy.50]

@@manilo-j8n unfortunately this things happening in the world. We have to follow morals .

[@Tammy.50]

Bahai’s having activities called community building activity, you can find in your neighborhood and join them.

[@farrahmayleigh]

Very sorry for all going throigh this. I feel this way although I am married...I am alone 90% of the time....I laugh to think this is why we've been married for 18 years so far.

[@nigella4me]

Yes, you can feel very lonely even if you're living with someone. This is a very hard journey for those of us suffering through it. Take care and try to stay strong. 😊

[@Starfish2145]

I totally relate to this. Typically you get a bunch of introverts commenting about how they love being alone. It’s irritating.

[@nigella4me]

Although I'm learning to deal with living alone a lot better now, there are still those days that overwhelm me and I wish someone was here daily. It's a double edged sword of sorts. Thanks for being on here. 😊

[@maureentillie5671]

I found this video today and can relate. My husband passed two and half years ago. He became physically unable to work so due to income decrease we had to move to affordable area. I retired early and now he's gone, I haven't been able to find work and no friends. My adult son still lives here but works and we hardly communicate. I try to keep busy with my art hobby or whatever but life's monotonous. I do feel like why am I here.

[@nigella4me]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. I totally understand, believe me. It does get monotonous no matter what one tries to do to pass the time. It's a very difficult time in life after being married and raising a family and then you're just alone. It does feel like, why am I here anymore. I hope you somehow find peace and some enjoyment in life again. I KNOW it isn't easy. ❤

[@GodiscomingBhappy]

I wonder if those tiny home communities would not be an interesting solution? i think i saw one that was for retirees, not sure which state. they had their homes but did communal gardens and had some poultry..... i thought that looked great......

[@ptlovelight2971]

I think this is a great idea! Even my previous apartment community had a communal vegetable garden, and it was a big help in fostering community and building new relationships

[@nigella4me]

I've watched the videos of Incredible Tiny Homes many times. It seems like such a wonderful way to live, maybe not the teeny tiny home, but the close community. The people seem so happy and close. It would be wonderful to have that kind of close knit community to live with all the time.

[@laura3619]

❤

[@danielcrespo4760]

I sit in my apartment all day nothing too good to watch on TV nothing good to read I get tired of reading watching TV looking at these four walls nobody to talk to I even stopped listening to music it's so weird that being alone really hurts and nobody really knows you understand

[@nigella4me]

I've been there believe me. What I do now is find ANYTHING to keep me busy, cleaning, going to the store, I color in a coloring book that's made for adults not children, rearrange things in my house, etc. But I have two dogs that are great company. Maybe you could get some kind of pet, they really help. I have days like you speak of too. Some days there's just nothing to do or I'm just not in the mood to do to pass the day. Try going to places where you could meet some people. I know it's not always easy but you might find some friends that way. I have my kids and grandkids and relatives and a good neighbor friend, which helps tremendously. So try making friends. Try going for walks or to a park, you'd be surprised where you can make friends. And yes, being alone does hurt. There are days when it's unbearable and days when all is good. It's not an easy way to live, I know. Wishing you the best. 😊

[@danielcrespo4760]

@@nigella4me okay I'll try I thank you I appreciate it this lonely man needs some help thank you

[@michellejackson2099]

If you were my neighbour, I'd gladly come hang with you if you dont mind being around a much younger person.

[@GodiscomingBhappy]

i thought the same thing. Shame there are no activities you would enjoy doing to fill out the loneliness. i try distracting myself by being in nature, it helps with those feelings of loneliness. Much love

[@minkorrh]

Cats are a thing. I'm a 55 year old guy and would not have it any other way. Being alone is just sublime as I've seen what the rest of society is like, and I have no need for a relationship outside of 3 hours.

[@nigella4me]

I'm glad you're happy with your lifestyle. 😊

[@danielcrespo4760]

I've been alone for and it doesn't feel good no friends family too far too busy it's not nice it's a bad feeling

[@nigella4me]

I thoroughly understand, believe me. Living alone can be one of the most difficult things in life. I'm a people person so living alone is truly a trial in life for me. I'm sorry you're struggling with it, it is NOT easy. Sending you hugs and strength. ❤️

[@danielcrespo4760]

@@nigella4me thank you very much for I can really use them thank you

[@nigella4me]

@@danielcrespo4760 You are very, very welcome. Know that you mean the world to someone somewhere. 🤗🫂

[@danielcrespo4760]

@@nigella4me thank you for your encouragement I appreciate it

[@Arrabella2024]

We need to start living an intentional/co-housing communities. They are growing in the United States but not quickly enough. This is the solution.

[@dickonmanwoody7599]

Or just have a family?

[@Chordonblue]

@@dickonmanwoody7599 This is the thing. With mental illness on the rise, can you trust those weird strangers to live next to? Will it be a choice? I don't think so. I think people will be forced to either move in together or packed in next to each other like sardines in a can with NO regard to whether some of them are nutjobs or perverts. And this most certainly will happen as this childless generation grows older and need 'community'. A REAL community (or family) would be able to pick and choose who gets to be part of it and who should be shunned. In the future, the government will decide this for you. How convenient! And don't complain - or your food allowance may be cut back. Dark, DARK times ahead!

[@Starfish2145]

That doesn’t sound the problem. You’re still living by yourself in your own little space.

[@sydneyfc7769]

You look good for 60 just saying lol

[@nigella4me]

I'm actually 68, but thank you. 😊

[@sydneyfc7769]

@@nigella4me wow i didn’t think you were 68 I thought 60 at most

[@michellejackson2099]

​@@nigella4meomg you look sooooooooo beautiful

[@patrickmckeown3683]

Rent out one of your rooms in your house a.k.a. a roommate. If you get a cool person, then you can check on each other to make sure that you’re safe and not in an emergency.

[@nigella4me]

I've thought of that but I've seen too many bad situations of other people and roommates and I just don't have the emotional strength to deal with that. Plus, I only have one bathroom and I won't share a bathroom. LOL!

[@patrickmckeown3683]

@@nigella4me I do understand that. Good luck to you.

[@Gary-Seven-and-Isis-in-1968]

You can only attempt to rectify the problem, when you understand what the problem is.🤔 You want company within your 4 walls. You want somebody to come home to and share your day with. Someone to share a life with, sit at that big table and enjoy a meal together. You've described someone who is genuinely alone and craving company. But you also say you don't want to share a bathroom with anyone.🤷🏼‍♂ Now it becomes more complicated.🤔 Perhaps the best way of looking at it is this way, at our age we've all been shaped and formed into who we are and how we feel by our life experiences. "It was a lousy marriage" is a Tee Shirt worn my many of us, I'm no exception to this fashion trend. So we've become set in our ways? Enjoying post war peace and prosperity is only good for so long. At some point the decision to rebuild must take place. Not rebuild our citadels but our lives. Do you choose to surrender some occupied territory (The Bathroom) and dispel loneliness. Or continue down the path of isolationism. Many more choose the latter and remain isolated. That is just Human nature, we have become "set in our ways" but isn't that more to do with personal security and avoiding making the same mistake twice? 🤔

[@nigella4me]

I believe a LOT of people will "settle" with whomever just so they won't be alone. I won't do that. I'd rather deal with the occasional loneliness than settle just so I won't be alone. But everyone has to deal with it however they can. 😊

[@miladyfeliciano1976]

Agree! I have been on my own for over 10 years and have no desire whatsoever to comingle at all.

[@jasonbradley1576]

Great job on this video nigella4me

[@nigella4me]

Thank you Jason, long time no hear! I hope you're doing well. 😊

[@jasonbradley1576]

​@nigella4me Yes I sure am.

[@liketearsintherain832]

❤