Parents Who Had Their Autistic Son Arrested

[@lucialovecraft]

My family were in this exact position with my brother. He’s autistic and non verbal. He was very violent and would break things constantly. We tried everything we could until eventually he had to go to a home under the care of MENCAP. He’s doing exceedingly well there because they know how to manage his needs properly. This is the other side of autism that gets so rarely talked about because people are too caught up in a romanticised version of what autism is. This is a very real situation a lot of families are having to deal with and my heart goes out to every single one of them

[@linvi_chemutai]

Jesus is the way the truth and the life. No one can go to the Father except through him.❤️ Knowing Jesus is knowing peace, protection and provision ❤️ Jesus saves, Jesus heals, Jesus grants peace and Jesus loves you.

[@pontiacman78]

Yes Jesus does. Of course! But why did you say this while this person gave there story?

[@Nameless-ny8nk]

​@@pontiacman78Because some christians feel good about themselves when they talk about their religion to others in need of help, it's much easier to send a generic “Jesus loves you” message that's so vague it could apply to a million situations than offering actual help, or support, or to even show some understanding for their situation. Also probably because the original commenter has “lovecraft” in their ussername and goth makeup, and the person you are responding to probably associated that with witchcraft, wich goes against christianism, in wich case the Jesus comment is actually an attempt to make them change into christianism as a way to help their situation (wich is kinda yucky if you ask me, to assume someone is struggling in life because of their lack of faith when you don't really know anything about them, and to use that reasoning as bait so they join your religion...)

[@yas-per]

It’s not rarely talked about, lmao

[@bubbainc-k6u]

@@linvi_chemutai what does Jesus have to do with this?

[@patriciaanndemello4652]

You had to get yourselves help. You had to get your adult son help. The problem was too much. You did the right thing. You've been wonderful parents.

[@trud6346]

Yea i hope their son is better now

[@Spectre-69]

If they're such amazing parents, then why do they talk about their son like he's a diseased freak? The words they use to describe autism as "severe", "debilitating" or "profound" as if it's a cancer, autistic people hear all the time. I've been called "severely autistic" for having comorbidities, or "profoundly autistic" for being unable to speak in stressful situations, and it's led to rejection and ostracization, and of course, the ever high rate of considering "self deletion".

[@biggzygaming2115]

just stop it before it starts thats what my family did my brother would punch and kick my parents it lasted for 1 week and my dad punished him as he would us other kids its the best thing dad ever did my brother now will not be violent because he know he can not get away with it he deals with things in other ways now .....STOP IT BEFOR IT START YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND SOMETIMES .if you want it to get to a point where you cant look after him just let him do what he wants and just keep talking to him saying please dont do that see how that works out you

[@childofcascadia]

@Spectre-69 Those words arent insulting. They just are words used to describe how affected someone is by a condition. And how dare you use the word "cancer" like its an insult. If you dont like the words "severe autism" how do you think people with cancer feel having you say "as if its a cancer"? No one makes the choice to be born or affected by any condition. Some people are more affected by conditions than others. Thats not bad or good. It just is.

[@fevertree1957]

Very well said. X

[@italialove70]

I see these autistic kids growing up and are big strong men. Sometimes they need more care then just a mother or father, they need to start creating places for the adult autistic people where they can live and be safe with all around care and safety.

[@terrorists-are-among-us]

We had them then activists pretended it was meeeeean to get them support. Now they roam the streets or get put up in an apartment next to unsuspecting hard working families.

[@joe9743]

Yeah. Mental health, especially in Men is very neglected in the United states Edit* as well as many other countries

[@terrorists-are-among-us]

@joe9743 you don't know what you're talking about about.

[@laura121684]

@@joe9743 You know autism isn't a mental health disorder, right?

[@clairez007]

It's called a group home,but many are too violent for that.

[@psychotheoryx]

I was a care taker of Special Needs Adults for 7 years before I got burned out. I can't even begin to imagine being a parent raising one. I love this video because it shows all sides of individuals, where as media typically just shows Down Syndrome individuals as a representation for all and don't speak about dark times. I had a couple individuals like Steven and I was constantly ridden with anxiety every time I'd take them out in Public or they start to act out in the home, but you can't show that anxiety and have to put a mask on and handle the situation. I'm so happy that Steven is in a good, supportive environment that is helping him maintain stability and happiness!

[@JamesHonest-vh1bp]

one autistic kid is equal to about 3-5 normal kids management wise. my parents did well raising 3 that were all over the spectrum.

[@mirleydamazio628]

Quem cuidará de nossos filhos quando nós morrermos? Mesmo autistas com grau 1 e 2, tem dificuldades para viverem sozinhos.

[@samuelmartin7259]

I have autism myself and seeing his parents being supportive through all of this and not giving up and giving him the help he needed makes me happy

[@sporitan]

I had the same feeling as a fellow autistic person! I am so grateful for him that he has such a loving and understanding family! It made me tear up the whole time watching this video. /gen

[@Spectre-69]

You're going to be disappointed when you find out this is an anti-autism channel.

[@Sadkoi]

@@Spectre-69 it’s a condition not a belief.

[@Deepocean567]

Your​ full of crap @Spectre-69

[@clairez007]

No you don't.

[@kellyhoy3902]

Stress kills people. Mother needs to know she did an excellent job and needs a vacation.

[@Kitty-SkinImIn]

If I leave a dangerous violent situation and I follow me outside….p3w p3w, idc who u are.

[@stephen6279]

I have asd and adhd. I'm verbal, have a house, a car, friends and a career. I got VERY lucky that my neurology is so capable.

[@unexpectedvixen5685]

This is one of the best documentaries I've ever seen. I'll be praying for his family.

[@DianaRoche-x3i]

All heart goes out to his family especially his mom and carers i hope his days become more calm and happy.

[@vickythefist7062]

The place that he's at now is amazing and gives him boundaries. His carer is a big dude so can restrain him easily whilst it was harder for elder parents .especially his mum . It was a beautiful scene watching mum reading to him .she's so patient. Made me so tearful when he threw a fit screaming at her .

[@BlodynGwyn]

He wasn't screaming AT her.

[@jamesheady7216]

Autistics should not be restrained at all, and if his caregiver is restraining him then that’s probably what’s contributing to a lot of his aggression in the first place.

[@annbarber9896]

@@vickythefist7062 the family are so fortunate to have found the caregivers and place

[@elizabethpieters7798]

​@@jamesheady7216you are not an expert and have never been assaulted by a strong heavy 6ft autistic male.

[@KathyPrendergast-cu5ci]

@@jamesheady7216So they should just be allowed to hurt themselves or other people?

[@annbarber9896]

My daughter is diagnosed with P.A.N.D.A.S Paediatric Autoimmune Neropsychiatric disorder associated with strep… This is identical behaviour

[@jaimiegreatorex4089]

This was the first thing I thought of when they mentioned the total behavioural and psychological changes after being ill. Especially since he met all of his milestones up until that point.

[@echofoxtrot2.051]

That's what I thought immediately!

[@Milaperadotti]

Yes not many people know about PANDAS

[@Diamonddavej]

I was diagnosed with Asperger’s as an adult. I remember about 3-4 years old, I got bad tonsillitis. I used to eat vegetables, eggs, but I became very picky with food. Then when I had my tonsils out, I stopped talking for a few weeks. I developed sensitivity to itchy clothes and smells. I got obsessed with astronomy, which resulted in bullying in school. So it's interesting, I know about PANDAS so wonder if a bacterial infection might be a cause. Also, around the same time I got hay-fever, so there's probably an autoimmune component. There is a genetic influence too. My nephew is autistic and my cousins on both sides of my family have children on the autism spectrum, about 3 or 4 children (10% are on the spectrum) Also, the same or similar bacteria also causes scarlet fever, which can result in a neurological condition called Sydenham's corea, OCD and movement disorder. The American artist, Andy Warhol, had scarlet fever and Sydenham corea as a child, his repetitive art might be related.

[@AliciaGuitar]

I am dx'd autistic but i am never violent. I had german measles as a baby and i have a genetic disorder called DEE that caused my autism. Its fascinating how these things seems to overlap some

[@amyhammon5437]

He is such a big young man... he seems trapped inside himself. Being fearful or upset about it seems like a very human response. As a momma, my heart aches 💔 for him and his family.

[@robmullin1128]

His parents made the right decision even though I cannot imagine the heartache of it. He is now living in a place where staff are specially trained to meet his needs.

[@tormmac]

they are actually lucky he over 18, if you try to get your child placed before 18 they will charge you with felony child endangerment and abandonment as part of the process of transferring custody to the state. im not kidding, they will make you a criminal for trying to get help.

[@Yvonne-fj7el]

@@robmullin1128 Years ago lads with difficulties like that would get a manual job which would need strenght. And would use up a lot of energy and would rest at home no bother in the evening.

[@clairez007]

Yup,the standard is a danger to himself or others.

[@Aknoski-t7d]

As a 21 yo autistic man, this brings back times when I would get extremely violent with my parents and just being disrespectful. It got to the point where the cops were called on me. Looking back I don’t blame them at all for doing so and was well deserved. I eventually made a friend at work who would change me into someone who’s independent but I do think about those times a lot and I regret everything so much and hate myself so much for it

[@angelapalmer6782]

Don't beat yourself up, we all do things that we regret. Your parents love you and they understand. I am so happy to hear you are doing well!!!

[@Bebedollie]

Everyone makes mistakes 🙏

[@vivdunn3851]

Dont hate yourself baby and i promise you your parents feel no hate towards you you've grown and worked it out what a beautiful thing to do and as a neurospicy myself I can say I have seen more of us grow and change than neuro typicals

[@whoputyouontheplanet3345]

You can't change what happened man; but at least you learned, grew, and are sorry. A lot of people don't (or sometimes can't) reflect on their actions.

[@vb593]

You're holding yourself accountable, as long as you're doing better moving forward no need to live with regret

[@BadBeech]

As a mother to a 5 year old son with severe non verbal autism, I cannot watch this. Not because I don’t know this is a possibility and want to pretend it isn’t, but because my mind is CONSTANTLY thinking about things like this. I will watch this and stay awake in bed at night, crying with anxiety. My sweet sweet boy. I pray I’m able to be enough. ❤

[@biggzygaming2115]

just stop it before it starts thats what my family did my brother would punch and kick my parents it lasted for 1 week and my dad punished him as he would us other kids its the best thing dad ever did my brother now will not be violent because he know he can not get away with it he deals with things in other ways now .....STOP IT BEFOR IT START YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND SOMETIMES .if you want it to get to a point where you cant look after him just let him do what he wants and just keep talking to him saying please dont do that see how that works out you

[@GetToTheFarm]

the frustration of having little ability to communicate and being unable to express your emotions and anger in a non violent way is just mindboggling

[@Simple_Jackass]

It must be absolute hell

[@thetortoise4107]

this is misleading, he wasnt arrested, he was involuntarily committed and sometimes the persons cuffed by the police for that to happen unfortunately (it shouldnt be that way but it is for now)

[@fuzzykyrra]

Sadly sometimes the police have to become involved to work alongside the paramedics if the person being involuntarily taken to a mental health facility is a threat to themselves or others. Also, in regards to the mental health facility stating that they could not guarantee Steven's safety- having worked in several mental health inpatient wards, I imagine that considering Steven's episodes of shouting and hitting the staff cannot predict the reaction of other patients to Steven's behaviour, or how he might be triggered by the behaviour of other patients himself.

[@lizichell2]

Unusually involuntary commitment where a police man puts hand cuffa on you meets a classic definition of being arrested

[@haydenmyers9446]

How do you know

[@Coco-xw3wp]

​@haydenmyers9446 right

[@lizichell2]

I mean usually

[@Commissioner62]

My autistic brother used to be harmful to himself, until he finally got on the right meds around age 17-18. He is 35 now, and still doing good.

[@anabella4166]

The fact that he has such a BIG and gentle man looking out for him… Omg that must be such a relief for Mom😢

[@meredithrogerson2152]

Thank you for sharing your story. You are an incredibly brave family. I taught special education and one of my students would have violent outbursts towards himself and staff. It was so difficult to get management to provide appropriate resources. I'm hope that by brave people like yourselves sharing their stories that appropriate resources and funding become available. I was absolutely traumatised by my experience and I am no longer able to teach which is a terrible waste. People who haven't experienced just have no idea.

[@dontbelongherefromanother]

Oh, I understand and work with special Ed students. I've witnessed students destroy the classroom, turn over tables and throw chairs. Also, I was almost physically attacked by a student and had to run and call for help. I'm at a point where I don't want to work in this capacity due to safety concerns of not only myself but other students, who may be attacked by violent students. There's not much that can be done to stop it because some of the students have extreme behavioral issues. Positive and negative reinforcements only work for a limited time and the behaviors manifest. Also, suspension doesn't always work. When students return after suspension, the violent behaviors start shortly afterwards. It's not safe for educators, especially when there aren't resource officers to restrain violent students. At my school, resource officers aren't allowed due to the traumatizing effects that it has on students. Teachers are given training on how to restrain violent students. However, restraints can be a challenge for female staff when trying to restrain male teenagers and adolescents, who are much stronger than they are.

[@vickythefist7062]

​@dontbelongherefromanother resource officer is just a nicer word for security gaurd that can restrain someone . Sadly, many of these schools/resource officers have abused their power and done horrible things

[@matcha_zuki5597]

​@dontbelongherefromanother I was the special Ed kid that would always have a pokemon book with me and and just tell everyone what pokemon they are and just never stop talking. I only had a small class we didn't have anything crazy happen so I am shocked and surprised reading it.

[@dontbelongherefromanother]

@@vickythefist7062 I get that, but teachers shouldn't be placed in a position to restrain violent students. This is a safety concern, and teachers aren't paid to take on an additional role as a security guard or police.

[@cllynch3653]

I was a special education teacher for 34 years but couldn't take it any more. I retired and now volunteer in a kindergarten class every day. So fun and rewarding!

[@1golfer1scooter]

Mom and Dad you did the right thing. , all of you need to be safe. Stephen too.

[@ozventure3822]

My son too did this. Head banging walls, slapping me, biting my arm... He was put in a group home at 20 and they have found different ways to stop him. Being a single mum, and he was so big, his little brother was suicidal and the only thing to calm him was dissolved valium. When I suffered a mini stroke from high blood pressure and he had just had his 3rd hip operation, I fell apart. I fully understand this family's anxiety. These homes are terrific! Wonderful carers. We visit, meet for lunch and have nice times. We're in Australia and he has ndis as do I now as I have early onset vascular dementia now. He is 35 now but is about 5 mentally with a big permanent lump on his forehead. Plz do not feel guilty when considering care, they are much better off with a busy lifestyle.

[@kamz1994]

❤❤❤❤

[@venusnightshade]

The fact that he has a 3:1 supervision ratio is wild. It's hard enough to provide 1:1 supervision nowadays (in the usa). Lack of funding. Terrible wages and retention rates.

[@lhproductions61]

It’s heartbreaking that there often times aren’t a lot of resources for people like Steven’s parents when their kids start to outgrow them and are capable of hurting them. A teacher in the US was just beaten within inches of her life, because a woman refused to put her autistic son who had violent meltdowns in a special school. She’s claiming she did everything right and it was the school who effed up. There’s multiple instances of him being violent with other teachers, students, and his mother. Mom says he doesn’t know what he was doing, but when they dragged him off his teacher he tried to get back to her and said he was going to “unalive her” all because she told him it was time to stop playing a game in his iPad and start doing the work on his iPad. Just because someone might be stunted and be have the mental capability of a young kid doesn’t mean they aren’t dangerous…

[@ToLoveIsToLive89]

It also doesn’t mean they don’t need discipline. I see so many children with disabilities that are just allowed to do whatever they want and it’s shocking to me!!

[@toria.strange.bastet]

This is so true. There was a kid in my 5th grade class who was like this and the staff would try to give him time to interact with us to help him build social skills. He was a few years older than us because he was held back a few grades to help him socially. One time they let him in the classroom with us and there was a teacher with him the whole time. The kid came up to me and pulled out his pen*s and started humping me. I had already gone through SA growing up and when this happened to me in front of my whole class it retraumatized me so much. Thankfully the teacher immediately pulled the kid off me and the teachers tried to pull me aside to see if I was ok. But all I remember is feeling so ashamed and embarrassed and disturbed. I refused to talk to anyone and just put up a wall and flat out ignored what happened. The kid continued to masterb*te each time he saw me in the hallway or class. They had to keep him separated from me and the other students and eventually sent him to another school soon after. Kids like this can't be in the general public. It's just not safe for anyone.

[@Afmedic85]

It wasn't an IPad, it was a Nintendo switch. Mom is claiming people are racist against her son because he's black. You can see on the surveillance video how much bigger he in than the teacher. You also see a student walking past and not stopping to help

[@teijaflink2226]

An autistic person saying they will kill someone definitely knows what they mean, though some who are not and strong could accidentally kill an elderly parent specially during a violent outburtst without meaning to.

[@sparxstreak02]

Having a disability is not an excuse to get away with murder (in this case almost literally) if they know the rules & what they’re expected to do, even within the limits of their disability then they KNOW when they've done wrong. I had to look after a 4 year old at a daycare I worked at who was autistic and if you had to remove him from a dangerous situation such as grabbing a fire extinguisher or trying to open doors to outside (which he was a notorious flight risk for) he did everything from pulling hair to scratching, hitting & BITING & was he ever disciplined when he did these things? Nope - he just threw a tantrum & was comforted after with a hug 🤦‍♀ I may have been forced to abide by my workplace's rules but I would not raise ANY kid of mine so slackly. I also didn't just take his abuse (cos that's what it WAS, age be damned!) I stopped him if he dared try any of that on me & even if another carer hugged him afterwards when he threw a tantrum, I never did (unless he hurt himself while playing). And I say all this as someone on the spectrum myself - because my mum (who has flaws like all parents) even after I was diagnosed, ALWAYS made sure I knew the boundaries she set & I knew them by the time I was the same age as the autistic daycare kid I looked after. Of course every autistic kid is different but many are still capable of learning & discipline & even for those who have trouble in this regard like Steven, should still have precautions set in place for their carers to ensure BOTH parties safety.

[@TrashyPanda420]

You cant expect people who have never been autistic a day in their life to understand what autism is like. These parent are doing everything they can

[@biggzygaming2115]

just stop it before it starts thats what my family did my brother would punch and kick my parents it lasted for 1 week and my dad punished him as he would us other kids its the best thing dad ever did my brother now will not be violent because he know he can not get away with it he deals with things in other ways now .....STOP IT BEFOR IT START YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND SOMETIMES .if you want it to get to a point where you cant look after him just let him do what he wants and just keep talking to him saying please dont do that see how that works out you

[@DoTheRightThingListenToMe]

Omg. I thought I was alone. I cannot let anyone see my house because of the broken doors and walls. 😢 thank you for letting me know I am not alone. Single mom w 2 autistic sons.

[@call_megumi]

Im coming at this with little personal experience of living at home with autistics, but sounds like from the severity of destruction of property that you describe, please get yourself to a place of safety asap, whether it be home removal for the boys, etc. You don't want to be what they destroy when you just happen to be closer than a wall. It's so scary - my mother has an incredible heart for people with mental disabilities and was a paraeducator for some time when I was an elementary school student. Watching her come home with bruises, scratch marks, bite marks, etc scared me as a kid. Especially if there are other kids at home, for their sake, and also for your sake, please get some measures in place to protect yourself and all of your loved ones, including your sons - protecting them from themselves is still protection.

[@Brad14397]

@@call_megumiI feel this. I grew up with a sibling that would literally kick through doors when she got to teenage hood. Landed most of my family in the hospital at various times. It’s so sad the aren’t more resources for working class people. As a personal plea: please protect any other children that you have! I still deal with the trauma and do not speak to my parents because they allowed me to be constantly abused by my sibling. Yes, even if it means the criminal justice system. You all deserve to feel safe in your own home, but it’s especially important during development.

[@helentratford3936]

@@Brad14397❤

[@Kitty-mb4hy]

This video is like 9-10 years old. I wonder how the family is doing now.

[@marinanieto7670]

Oh makes sense why there seemed to be less information abt autism during the report and why his diagnosis was so late

[@natenate2280]

@@marinanieto7670yeah this was filmed mid 2000's

[@padmathalamarla8246]

15 yrs ago..

[@unknownx2k7]

From July 2016

[@GD-xc4wg]

​@@marinanieto7670 not necessarly the diagnosis We are 2024 and one of my sibling was diagnose last year and the mom told the Drs many times he was sleeping late never before 11pm, he was always running like an hyperactive, he would not look into the eyes, he had spécial interests also like older kids but Drs never said he might be and we learn it all last year about he was Asberger (which this too is not called Asberger anymore, but high IQ kid well now adult!) There is a lack of help but also a big lack of knowledge about it from Drs too. Even this, they are not specialized on Autism so its hard on any kids and parents and as its not a disease its not something you can heal either Tough for sure

[@Cthulhuismyhero]

Im sorry for the families dealing with this but we need more institutions and help for people with these types of issues.

[@sarahpauline4904]

Vaosila has such a peaceful, strong demeanor. It isnt everyone who could care for vulnerable people like Steven.

[@jeanlee1911]

mental health in most countries is a joke when it comes to autism in older teens and adults

[@annealbert9490]

Totally agree

[@wholelottaweather24]

Mental health is a joke period if ur not women🤦🏿

[@violetgypsie]

A great majority of my family is autistic, including myself. But none of us have an intellectual disability. The combination of autism and intellectual disability is extremely difficult once the children grow up. Autism on it's own is a frustrating life, I can't imagine trying to deal with adult children with these two comorbidities. I wish this family all the best.

[@buds8423]

I don’t think the average person realizes the “spectrum” that families experience. They see an actor playing an Asperger person, or a high functioning Down’s syndrome actor, and think they understand. I had a work experience on a locked medical/mental ward specifically for extremely violent(murder/arson/etc) young teens/adults with developmental disabilities and TBI. It was full with a huge waiting list. The home based violent developmentally disabled locations are really a mixed bag in US. There is such a ludicrous attempt to have the ‘normal’ facade, that a TV will be replaced every week vs putting it behind a barrier, the walls end up looking like the first home, and neighbors have to put up with the screaming. Residents and staff aren’t safe, but looks like your average suburban home…Then they wonder why there’s a worker shortage! The way we take care of ALL vulnerable people needs to be re-examined. Take a deep breath. Stop trying to make everyone fit into one little mold, but BALANCE what works to keep everyone safe and healthy. They released the mentally ill to die on the streets, and it’s estimated 30% -40% of homeless have a cognitive impairment. I have a friend who’s siblings are separated by only a very few IQ points. This resulted in one living in a 4 bedroom house with 4 roommates, 24 hour staff, meals, medical care and programmed entertainment throughout the day. The other was ‘allowed’ to be homeless and no one has heard from them in a few years now…

[@BoJo5066]

I agree. I wish they could have reformed and improved the mental hospitals instead of closing them down and releasing people to the streets or putting them in group homes where the violent ones beat the day lights out of the staff, roommates and neighbors and constantly breaking things. I saw and experienced it countless times in the 1990s through 2018 when I stopped working in that job. There was a fare share of the profoundly mentally disabled ones, who were on the sex offender list against children, due to a lack of proper training, teaching, and supervision. Dont get me wrong, Im not saying that all profoundly mentally disabled people are sex offenders, Im just saying that some were, but most of them were NOT. Thankfully, most of them were like everyone else and just wanted to be happy, but sadly, many lacked the skills to deal with their emotions and life, which is where the training and experiencing life helps.

[@jamesalexander8193]

The main question is how could it possibly work? How can you make it so the violent ones can be safe and cared for without the staff being assaulted? How do we make it so they can better control themselves? I saw one documentary were the mum sadly is at the end of her rope as her son has meltdowns and is violent, she use to hold him down because he would punch himself but he is too strong for that and will head butt her or bite her face. She now sticks boxing gloves on him to stop him beating himself because he would do it until he was bleeding. How can men like him be helped and taught not to injure themselves. Medication is a mixed bag some do help but some others do nothing or make the situation worse.

[@howareyoualiveifyoudonteatbeef]

As an autistic person, I don't want to be demonised by 'bad apples' because disabled people already have a difficult time and it's bad enough trying to get fair representation where you are treated like a capable, autonomous human being.

[@margodphd]

​@@jamesalexander8193Proper staff to patient ratio, facility planning and layout, equipment, training, shift length (and proper compensation and leave times/rotation), medication and safe "seclusion" rooms all work together to ensure safety of both staff (who are in difficult position physically and mentally) and clients. Unfortunately it's all really, really expensive.

[@OneMilian]

Real people with aspergers have much more complicated color than any one dimensional hollywood bazinga sheldon or praised introvert doctor with "super powers" art imitates life just like you all said

[@sarahnietzschmann1213]

Was PANDAS ever considered? He changed after a infection.. could it have been strep?

[@animaanimus8011]

My thought as well. I’m a psychologist and his behavior seems more than autism. Looks like PANDAS to me.

[@CricketGirrl]

What an interesting idea! Another person commented about this. Sounds promising.

[@limeycinnamon]

Where are you getting your information on PANDAS? I've not seen an awful lot of reliable sources for it being a genuine phenomenon. It could just be that it needs more studying, but it's likely PANDAS wasn't considered as it's not a proper diagnosis at this point in time

[@teijaflink2226]

Maybe he got brain injury from the infection which led to the severe autism, poor parents and their son, they all must be really suffering.

[@katiempojer]

I know once they said after w virus! I was like omg they missed it

[@kathyhallock2528]

A family friend of my aunts married a woman whose daughter was just like this. It is very heartbreaking for him and he truly loves her. She is much better now.

[@jessica07712]

What a heartbreaking decision this family had to make ❤ you can tell they are still heartbroken about it. You had to make the best decision for both your son and your family

[@lifeandhomewithmeredith9050]

I'm so sorry this happened to your family! Much love.

[@SaucednFound7]

You guys did an amazing job raising Steven and his life now seems to be in good hands. His care workers all look like big teddy bears who just wanna see the best for your son.

[@Garf_malarf]

His caregivers are amazing. God bless all of them

[@nandorios4503]

On 11/11/97 my Gf an I had our son..she was 16..i was 17.. we are now married with 3 girls.. Our son will be 28 this November. We went through all this. Our son has been many different people. From a loving kind child to a quite withdrawin teen an a aggressive self harming adult. We had to change his diet, his activities and our way of dealing with the meltdowns. Its very hard sometimes but we trust one another in his care and glad to say his meltdowns are far an in-between. My heart goes out to your family an Steven and ill keep you and families like you in my prayers.. We're a Native American family and we see your love and this story has touched us and many like yours. Keep love going no matter what and Creator or whatever you believe will bless you.

[@9852323]

Having my own mental issues I’d never be able to handle a child with autism.

[@brt5273]

Same. So glad I didn't reproduce.

[@kymiz_]

Well never have children then. Even if your child comes out without any disabilities then you still can’t have a kid since you revealed you have mental issues. Tho I hope you do heal ❤

[@9852323]

@@kymiz_ I mean..people with mental issues can have kids and be wonderful parents..but indeed for some it’s just too overwhelming with everything else goin on. Thanks for the kind words.

[@9852323]

@@brt5273 same here.

[@techiebliss]

Yes, it can break almost anyone. The world doesn’t need more humans anyhow.

[@WomanVeteran]

Hello, I was just crying 😭. This is what happened to my son. He got 6 shots and then got sick. Running a fever for a few hours after. Then the next day… he was different. My son is 16 now. He had to be in a group home. I have pictures. Your home looked like mine. He is still not okay. ABA therapy, Autism school, everything and I know… I just got a call today. He went off again. He is hurting people. Peace be with you. I know that pain. You do anything and everything…. Hugs from an Autism Mom.

[@Catapultout]

Hugs to you too

[@WomanVeteran]

@ thank you 😊

[@Catapultout]

@@WomanVeteran just an autistic child and parent to an autistic child saying what makes me feel better. No need to thank me here

[@ovrurhed0yezir]

Same. Shots fever next day gone. Just not the same. Stopped walking talking eating sleeping eye contact. I'm going through exactly what they are. But my son is extremely agreessive all the time. Homes in walls hits himself bites me ect. He's 14. I'm scared all the time but I live him i couldn't live without him

[@WomanVeteran]

@ Unfortunately I had to place him. I have known someone that got beat up and put in the hospital. I need to make sure we both are safe. It is hard. But I look at what is working for him not me. I will see him for Xmas. I won’t ever leave. Stay safe. Hugs 🤗

[@Jdjustsaying]

Ive been the victim of autistic violence. 10 years in therapy. The pain in my face and back remains present to this day, 24 years later. Its uncomfortable to hear about violent disabled people because our media is full of feel good cute disabled stories.

[@honeybunch5765]

Firstly, I want to sympathise with you regarding your battle. It must have been extremely traumatising and to still live with the pain so many years later. I'm truly sorry. I agree, autism became fashionable since they named it a spectrum. I get there are levels of autism, same with any other mental health illness. I recently listened to a biographer who shadowed Elon Musk, who was diagnosed with Asperges (when it still was named it). He said that Elon has a huge turnover of employees because of his aggression. Elon's ex called it "demon mode." He said they never knew when Elon would have outbursts. He can't handle stress like a normal person. He becomes frustrated and then aggressive, typical autism. The media and especially social media, must stop romanticising the illness. These are people who have brain damage in various degrees.

[@Jdjustsaying]

@ 100 % thank you

[@biggzygaming2115]

just stop it before it starts thats what my family did my brother would punch and kick my parents it lasted for 1 week and my dad punished him as he would us other kids its the best thing dad ever did my brother now will not be violent because he know he can not get away with it he deals with things in other ways now .....STOP IT BEFOR IT START YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND SOMETIMES .if you want it to get to a point where you cant look after him just let him do what he wants and just keep talking to him saying please dont do that see how that works out you

[@MissShanUg]

I feel so bad for him and the entire family.May God give Him the strength to overcome all his challenges

[@NakedMartinMartin]

Seems God gave him tardpower

[@friedrichjunzt]

But God gave him the challenges in the first place?

[@dawnatkinson7704]

I have suffered with physical disability and after 20 years of continuous pain, serious mental health issues. I've considered suicide a lot but the moment I would lose control and attack my loved ones will be the last day on earth.

[@lucy.brenn4n]

is this supposed to be an attack on a severely mentally disabled and incapacitated individual who has no concept of this?

[@beth8194]

I've felt this way too-I am chronically ill and often feel like caring for me causes pain to those around me. But I've also been on the other side-I'd guess losing you entirely would hurt them so deeply, perhaps even more than the pain of being hurt any other way. I'm so glad you're still here 💖

[@David29497]

This isnt about you dork

[@user-wg4ie9pb3x]

@@lucy.brenn4n : Take a seat, Karen.

[@call_megumi]

@@lucy.brenn4n not at all what OP seems to be commenting. Your comment isn't helpful.

[@sdd123]

This mother’s love is so beautiful but what a heartbreaking story.❤🙏

[@ameliawilson9074]

This is the side of autism we rarely get to see. Yes it’s very rare, but it’s a serious problem with the lack of funding or even concern from governments both in Aus and NZ. The funding cuts to the NDIS are disgraceful. Much love to these amazing parents who’ve had to make the hardest decision to protect their safety and mental health. I can’t imagine the burden these circumstances would feel like at times. But still they don’t complain are patient and loving towards their children, amazing video origin❤️ P.s that kiwi caretaker of Elliot seems like the sweetest soul🥺(no surprises tho kiwis are generally super compassionate and lovely!).

[@NakedMartinMartin]

Not autism, just a raging moid that should been in jail

[@techiebliss]

it’s not rare at all, they just don’t show this to the public because they don’t want people to realize how serious it is and how much more serious it’s going to get when these kids are becoming middle-aged adults and the parents are passing away…. and there’s nowhere for them to go. What’s going to happen to them?? They don’t want us thinking about that. It’s all going to blow up soon.

[@Linds-oz1oz]

@@techieblissit’s a massive spectrum. There’s plenty of us that are normal functioning adults. There’s others who are stuck in homes their whole lives, there’s been numerous geniuses like Einstein that have been autistic, and there’s symptoms everywhere in between. Autistic adults have existed for as long as we’ve been able to record. They just didn’t have proper terms or technology to properly categorize it until more recently in history. It either went undiagnosed, and the person was just considered to be weird, or on the more severe side, they were deemed “r*tarded” and locked away from the rest of society. Please don’t talk about subjects you clearly don’t know about. The most severe cases most certainly need to be taken more seriously, and the lack of help they get is horrific. That I agree with, but that doesn’t account for all of us, or even the majority really.

[@techiebliss]

@@Linds-oz1oz NO. It’s a scam to write tons of prescriptions to people who don’t need them, WAKE UP ALREADY. You can’t combine neurodevelopmental impairment with psychosocial awkwardness, those are two completely different things that have nothing to do with a “spectrum”. Autism is an umbrella term to cover up what is happening to these kids from environmental toxins put out by multibillion dollar industries. It’s GATEKEEPING.

[@infinitedeath1384]

​@@techieblissPeople with disabilities go into a group home when their parents pass away or can no longer care for them. I have disabilities and have accepted that, down the line, I will be in a group home someday.

[@catherinewilson2289]

They mention that at 2 years old he 'got a virus' as though that changed his brain to become autistic rather than him being naturally orientated that way. This was quite vague and needs more explanation. Could there be a virus that attacks the brain in such a way that damages the brain's ability to cope with stress - for example the presence of tumours in the brain manifests symptoms of anger and emotional distress.

[@friedrichjunzt]

Could be PANDAS

[@rajimac]

I know this first hand. My conclusions after 30 years is, child is born, diagnosed with autism and because parents are shocked and upset , they will do anything to keep their child happy. They child is small and the parent is still able to manage any upsets. The child becomes a teen:young adult. They often have a late onset of puberty. They srart getting aggressive , they are bigger and stronger and it’s harder to manage. You suddenly have a huge angry adult toddler. They’ve often never had much expected of them. Everybody runs around trying to keep them happy so they are a huge , incompetent angry adult toddler. I would tell any parent of a young child with autism to have expectations, get them doing as much as the other children in the family, don’t pander to bad behaviours, don’t let screens and tv take over and try to allow your young adult to grow up . Finding the right residential setting for the young person when they are young . Don’t keep them at home being a mini tyrant as you parents are getting older and less able to cope. You do them a great disservice if you play into their obsessions and behaviours and have no expectations. Loving somebody is not about keeping them happy all the time. Like the mother packing the suitcase, carrying the suitcase and putting it in the car. The son should be doing that himself. And people with autism can do things. I’ve experienced it.

[@nikkilynn4000]

As someone who grew up with an autistic sibling that to this day isn't told "No" because it'll make him violent and upset, everything you're saying is true.

[@lucialovecraft]

I come from a family with three autistic siblings. This hit home.

[@rajimac]

And I’m not just having a go at parents. I know it’s hard . There is so much guilt and worry that parents just try to manage but the child gets more and more difficult. We had people who went to school in a place where they learned skills as a young person and they worked in the garden, or learned a craft, found a niche in life at a young g age, farming or gardening etc… as adults they lived productive lives and had friends All be it slightly different. Theb I met people who lived at home until they were 30/40 and they suffered so much when their parents got too old to support them any more . They find it hard to adjust and they are distracted . I’d want the former for my child if they had autism. Also siblings suffer too. We did some family support groups and they were very important to the families. Stuff came up from way back. We don’t need to feel sorry for people with disabilities, we need to give them the skills to manage their lives .

[@littleautibatsfantasybooks7593]

i am NOT a "person with autism". I am AUTISTIC. and its beautiful. but that said the rest of your comment is absolutey true. that can be the case... i wasnt diagnosed until i sought out a diagnosis at 20 years old. i am glad, so glad i was diagnosed later in life. i have an extensive vocabulary because my mom read to me every night. i am in university because as a kid i had the option to do the schoolwork or pick potato bugs in the garden. my brothers are neurotypical and we were all raised the same. to understand respect, and work ethic and to do our best but never let anyone tell us we werent good enough. to be solution focused and use our imaginations to find solutions. to be resourceful and know that no one was gpoing to save us from the consequences of our actions so we have better be very very very careful in life. dont take stupid risks. when i was 4 i remember throwing a fit in the store. my mom didnt buy me what i wanted nor did she get angry. she simply walked to the cash and said "okay! im leaving! see you later!, i guess your staying here for the night!" i remember running after her "mommy! mommy!" her response was, "well you better keep up or youll get left behind.. im going home so if your coming with me, get in the car." i thank her for all her love and support and im extremely close with her . im looking after her in her older years just as i saw her look after my grandparents. i learned alot through her modelling what to do and what not to do, and imitating her. so no, your little theory isnt always what happens but it can be when parents dont want to parent anymore. instead they want to cater because they are so scared of being called abusive if they discipline their kids. its ridiculous. child services needs to cast a much narrower net AND there needs to be consequences for making false reports. simple as that.

[@inthewoods5494]

You cannot force an autistic person to be normal and the part about obsessions is just nit picking. Liking something a lot hurts nobody. You will be fine, old man.

[@VincentRollins-j3s]

you both are great parents who would go above and beyond than far more, i can feel your pain and tell its genuine. im so sorry

[@ragoyster1089]

I work in the social care sector and firmly believe that families cannot sustain this level of abuse in the home. It needs a team of people to support his needs.

[@9395gb]

The problem is the parents didn't discipline the kids early on. They are allowed to get away with bad behavior because they are autistic.

[@louisewhaaat7051]

I’m autistic and I believe autistic children sometimes need more discipline, not less then the average child.

[@KazixeZone]

I used to be violent and have outbursts as a teenager, and the police were called on one occasion, but thankfully I'm low on the spectrum. I 'grew out' of it, and although I still have my difficulties sometimes, I couldn't imagine hurting my parents or family. Some of us aren't so lucky, and I can only imagine the pains of sending someone you love away.. but ultimately it's for his own safety and the family's. I hope he's doing okay! And the parents! They need a vacation.

[@vickythefist7062]

A 3 or 4 year old still knows not to be naughty and violent . This poor family especially mum who was having a mastectomy. They look so exhausted and sad. life just isn't fare to some people

[@ImagineAsylo]

Did you miss the part where he is autistic?

[@DIYsober]

Be grateful to God that you live in a country that will take him away. In my country, parents are forced to take care of these dangerous children.

[@Veloth-y3d]

Parents should feel zero guilt about keeping the violence out of their lives.

[@bryn1063]

Yeah but thats their child. Of course they're gonna feel bad about sending him away. There's a huge stigma around this sort of thing. So it's natural to feel shame. Not that they're wrong and the stigma is right. Just that I get where the self blame is coming from.

[@JellyfishButterGaming]

I work in this field of caretaking and it’s really rewarding. I hope others consider it. ❤

[@davidtifft66]

How sad. So scary to see him as a responsive and smiling toddler.

[@jimmyanttaylor8030]

My child has severe non verbal autism and he's always been happy never once been violent he's 19 he loves life

[@susanford1598]

I have a 23yr old son just like him, I too was recently diagnosed with breast cancer so I know all too well how stressful it is to juggle treatment while looking after my son, most days I’m grateful my cancer was detected early but there are days that I wish it was terminal. I’m on my own, my husband left 8yrs ago because he wanted a life, NDIS isn’t much help because they are not set up for young adults who are hard to manage, I just take each day at a time, two years ago I started painting as a way of managing my stress and depression , Brian enjoys watching Big Bang and other programs and is very good at doing the recycling, he likes to go shopping and waves at everyone. there are good days and bad. He doesn’t like other disable people or dogs after being bitten by a strangers dog, this makes it had to go places like parks or Bunnings as he goes into extreme panic. I do feel my mental health sliding, and there is simply no care for the carers, I think if it wasn’t for painting I’d probably end it all…. But tomorrow’s another day isn’t it? and if I’m not around to look after my son then who will?

[@nat22228]

I’m so very sorry you’ve been dealt such difficult cards in life, it’s just not fair. I can’t say anything to make a difference to your situation but please know that there is someone out there thinking of you ❤

[@debramedina9347]

Autistic people are wired differently with different personalities. My cousin is nonverbal, his parents love and understand him and help him so much. Som autistic are violent and need specialized help. Others are full functioning with their own apartment and job. I pray your son gets the help he needs.

[@biggzygaming2115]

just stop it before it starts thats what my family did my brother would punch and kick my parents it lasted for 1 week and my dad punished him as he would us other kids its the best thing dad ever did my brother now will not be violent because he know he can not get away with it he deals with things in other ways now .....STOP IT BEFOR IT START YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND SOMETIMES .if you want it to get to a point where you cant look after him just let him do what he wants and just keep talking to him saying please dont do that see how that works out you

[@EvonneLindiwe]

Omg 😧 I’m so sorry to this family. Everyone is so tired and broken

[@dganet]

One of the saddest & yet, most uplifting videos ever ❤❤❤ xxx

[@weston6568]

I Was diagnosed with PANDAS and Autism as a child. I had very similar outbursts to his. I was often in a uncontrollable state of anger. My body and limbs would be out of my control. I often hit myself and other objects around the house. My mom had to reinforce my door and windows in my room. When I was ten years old I had a outburst in public and was arrested. The state hand mandated that I was to be put into the psych ward for a year. It was a very traumatic experience for me and I still have nightmares of going back. As I got older now outbursts have stopped. But now instead of having outbursts when I’m stressed. I often have seizures instead. The seizures are definitely better than having outbursts tough. I hope this boy can recover from this disease. I couldn’t even imagine how hard it is to have this disease as an adult.

[@sameoldsonganddance]

The huge amount of autistic children are going to be large adults very soon. What are parents to do with a 6’ 250lb toddler???

[@mylightgraycottage4913]

I feel so bad for this family. As much love as they have for Steven they are aging and there will come a time when they would not be able to control him. I hope the whole family finds peace and know they did the right thing

[@donnajohnson8035]

Utterly heartbreaking 💔

[@roobearlillibee5301]

Utterly beautiful.

[@queenvictoria4237]

I'm autistic myself but I'm functioning and able to talk. I feel sympathy for the parents and the guy as no-one asked for this.

[@carriejames5038]

And what sucks about any government is people ask for help but dont get it but if they get arrested or on drugs or etc etc they get all the help and its not fair how that goes

[@phoenixrising4995]

We need to bring back asylums for these people.

[@laurajaneluvsbeauty9596]

Of course he was in with adults, he’s HUGE! And i know he’s too big and too strong for you two to handle, you can’t expect for him to be in a hospital around children

[@TheRamblingsofBry]

No real quality of life is it? 3 full time minders must cost a fortune. Controlled by meds and food. I think the mum [probably dad too] are afraid of their child. It is a shame, and I feel sorry for all involved.

[@cathywillems9206]

I’m so sorry for all of the pain and worry that you have all been through and continue to live with every day.God bless you all.

[@manray6584]

This reminds me of my schizophrenic brother. When he was locked up he used to call us all the time. Now he's free but he's off in his own world. He's not even on social media anymore.

[@kristingallo2158]

Social media is a cesspool for narcissists

[@tray1813]

I am so sorry for the pain you are going through. I have a severely autistic son. He is now 52 yrs. old. My child went into a group home at 10 yrs. old. I have been laying awake at night hating myself. It hurts so bad that I am a bad mom.

[@danielle8608]

Post viral illness sounds more like PANDAS than autism no?

[@Rat_Queen86]

I had the same thought- the symptoms can be very similar

[@DawnMeow]

@@wuddafxupppsounds like your braindead to me

[@Rat_Queen86]

@@wuddafxupppwhat?

[@anghart8622]

It’s great u found help for him wish they had like that for my brother here a home of his own with carers of his own would never happen in Canada unless your minted

[@Milaperadotti]

For sure

[@Atomic-Purple-Guy]

I struggle with autism as well. Im in the higher functioning category though. We all just want our kids to be happy. I deal with stemming and I hate to be touched by anyone except my girlfriend. As I've been getting older my stress levels and sensitivity have increased. Noises, touch, visual it has all gotten worse. I don't consider myself non verbal but for the first 5 years of my life I barely talked had a good therapist that helped me use my words instead of screaming. In this case you guys did the right thing. It's hard to raise an autistic adult. Trust me it's hard for me to deal with my own problems. You sent him away because you love him and he's needs more help than you can provide. I hope he's doing well now. I hope you guys get to visit.

[@techiebliss]

If you are able to type this on KZbin you are not autistic. People stop. Us parents are struggling, TRULY STRUGGLING and crying all the time wondering what will happen to our kids if we die suddenly and our kids can’t get REAL BIOMEDICAL HELP because people like you go around saying you’re autistic because you have psychosocial issues that can be addressed through therapy. OUR KIDS CAN’T LIVE ON THEIR OWN WITH THERAPY, EVER. Stop this now. You aren’t helping.

[@Atomic-Purple-Guy]

@@techiebliss I don't give a crap what you think I was diagnosed with autism. You are the problem assuming that autistic people can't function or even write a comment on KZbin. Autism is a spectrum. Why would I pretend to be autistic? It is fucking debilitating. It's hard for me to be in places with a lot of people. Sounds make my skin crawl. I can't even hug my own parents without feeling weird. I do it but I don't like it. Don't fucking assume something just because you are ignorant to autism and it's spectrum.

[@Linds-oz1oz]

@@techieblisspsychologists that diagnose this person know a lot more than you ever will, so cut the cráp. You have no room to yap about what you wrongly think autism is. Like it or not, it is a massive spectrum. We are not all the more severe side of it. Do everyone a favor, and don’t talk about subjects you clearly know nothing about. If you actually have a child with autism and you’re this bigoted and miseducated about it I feel so so horrible for them. The way you view them, treat them and infantilize people with the disability has to be horrendous.

[@techiebliss]

@@Linds-oz1oz They often aren’t diagnosed by psychologists but by “Behavioral Analysts” who are not trained in neurology or even BIOLOGY. It’s a SCAM. You have no idea who I am and what I know. I’ve been researching this for ten years now for my child and I have the test results proving heavy metal contamination. How many years have you put into doing independent research?

[@sharonsecord5777]

I wonder what he’s thinking when he gets so agitated? He must be so afraid.☹️♥️

[@Lexington-Felix]

IDK BUT EDIBLES Would PROBABLY HELP CALM HIM.

[@Milaperadotti]

Very true not a lot of people know about PANDAS

[@jamesheady7216]

Exactly, yours is the most reasonable comment. I’ve read on this comment section so far.

[@Linds-oz1oz]

@@Lexington-Felixedibles, no. CBD, definitely. If you have a bad trip on edibles that can cause you to be more terrified. CBD doesn’t have the same mental effects, it’s just calming.

[@Queenofgreen515]

I can testify how hard it is for people with autism. I just got my diagnosis at age 37. School didn’t care, they just labelled me a naughty child. They punished me every time i couldn’t cope and caused so much trauma. Noone noticed until i was groomed into a crime gang and subsequently arrested. I was treated like a monster and an evil person because nobody bothered to ask if id been groomed or forced to comply with the gang. It was a probation officer who finally saw my social vulnerability. Finally i saw a psychiatrist as part of the legal case who diagnosed me. Im level 1, and can advocate for myself. But you try getting any help even when you can explain what you need. They just throw antidepressants at me and put me on the 18 month long waiting list for CBT as though my autism is an error in my thinking! Its left up to me try to explain my needs when i already struggle socially. I have terrible anxiety and depression. Most of the time people make very little allowance for autism. I cant imagine being level 2 or 3. Theres nothing wrong with asking for help when you need it! And there should be WAY more help available for autistic people and their families!

[@AnahiSanchez-ti2gj]

No offense, but knowing right from wrong is easy to tell. That are many people that are struggling from anxiety. Your want to communicate wastn there period, dont blame the people around you cause the reason you are autistic is because you are connected to that other world that people can't persieve. Sure theres a lot of things you can learn from there but there are also a lot of things you can learn. As good as bad. You being autistic doesn't mean you dont have the intelligence it just mean you struggle to communicate and not because you dont want to but because you tend to be more impulsive. Stop putting blame on those around you, you lived past 5 so that tells me you had someone tjat cared for you and loved you. So stop the "is cause i can't" because you don't want to deal with the guilt of what you did. Period. Also, hard to tell me otherwise when the high masking autistic are looking at you from behind their mask like "wooooooooooooow" Be more aware and conscious and stop trying to ganther sympathy by suddenly turning suicidal because that's a controlling tactic in case no one told you.

[@bagelbagelwah5047]

@@AnahiSanchez-ti2gj You have unfortunately proven the commenter's point by being a prime example of the people they speak out against - people who make assumptions about how autistic people feel, live, and act. Assumptions that can vastly differ from what the autistic person is actually going through. The commenter said, "Most of the time people make very little allowance for autism." Their words couldn't be truer in this case. There's not much figurative room left for allowance, not when people's assumptions take up that space and often refuse to budge. Of course, the same can happen in reverse. Double-blind empathy is a real thing. It would be nice if we could all intuitively understand each other from the get-go, but we don't seem to. The next best thing we can do is strive to understand one another, to listen and give each other room to breathe, ideally before those assumptions become suffocating. We could all use some more awareness. All of us.

[@bagelbagelwah5047]

I'm sorry that you fell through the cracks and had to struggle for so long, especially in a world that didn't understand where you were coming from. I was also diagnosed late, and growing up, I also struggled with school thinking I was being intentionally defiant or misbehaving. As an adult, even though I have my diagnosis and know how to voice my needs more effectively, it's still not easy, not by far. Keep hanging in there, alright?

[@AnahiSanchez-ti2gj]

@@bagelbagelwah5047 that's a double standard because only autistic man feel and move like this while woman move differently due to accountability and being thaught at a young age that we will be parents and being forced to be parents which is something as man yall don't have to worry. My comment proves nothing, it's an observation. If you can't handle an observation, is not my fault. But keep on the good fight.

[@AntoinettexKitten]

My brother in law is like this. But his parents refuse to put him in a group home. My father in law kicked me out because his ex wife forced my brother in law off on him because he got kicked out of his last place for trying to kill his roommate. He's lived with his dad for 9 years now and destroyed the house i helped fix up while his dad was gone for weeks as a truck driver. Then when he had retire due to a back injury my brother in law tried to kill him. My husband had to move in to pay the bills and protect his dad because his other brother didn't feel like putting up with all of it. So im living with my family because there's no room for me there and im in constant danger whenever im there for more than an hour. I've seriously considered divorce but we cant afford it. Originally me and my husband were living with his dad because we couldn't afford a place of our own and the deal was that i would cook and clean while he was away and my husband would work to pay the bills and fix anything that needed fixing. His dad would send money to help pay the bills and any repairs my husband couldn't do. 9 years after my brother in law moved in and i moved out the house is barely recognizable. It's full of filth and animals. My father in law lives in his room while my brother in law has the rest of the house. My husband lives in a barely functioning camper in the backyard and only comes in the house to take his dad to the doctor or take a shower. He's constantly working and hardly ever home. Any time my husband has tried to stand up to his brother he has been arrested because the neighbors or his mother calls the police on my husband for 'hurting her baby'. My brother in law never sits in jail for more than a night and gets special treatment because he's got an illness. The police know he's dangerous but blame my husband and just tell his dad to make sure he takes his medication. He never does. All he does is drink and get high with the few friends he has. He steals any money my husband sets aside to get our own place nearby so we can check on dad. Even if we did get a place we know the brother would force his way in and we can't do anything about it.

[@mp5249]

❤ sounds bipolar... my son died from the consequences of the illness. I loved my son so deeply, but it was unbelievably hard. He was violent at home he went into state care at 16. I won't get hurt in my own home. It broke him, and it still hurts me greatly to think about it, but he was violent as a toddler, slept through the night, first time, age 11. Being around him was always walking on eggshells

[@CaviarDiamondsss]

20:20 His big sweet self! ❤️ He looks the exact same as he did when he was a little boy, adorable 🥹

[@taylorsorensen4258]

What loving parents. I am so sorry you've had to go through this ❤

[@RitaWillis-db8hi]

This is scary. These children are not easy to handle. Nobody blames you no matter what you do . I don't think I could handle it. I had a son who became dangerous. I could not deal with it alone. His father only made matters worse. We no longer talk. Due to the danger of dealing with it. Sad but God knows the truth.

[@Lauren-bd2fr]

My best friend’s family has a son with severe autism. While he can occasionally throw a fit and maybe hit a little, he has never consistently been violent, and DEFINITELY not this violent. He has never made a hole in the wall or gotten violent to the point of concern. That just goes to show that low functioning autism like this does not equate to violence. That poor family, I bet they felt like they would get judged for this because some people don’t understand that this is not normal behavior for autistic kids Edit: I feel like I didn't say this correctly. I do understand that low functioning autism can lead to violent outbursts at times (even high functioning occasionally) but in my own experience, I've never seen it this bad. I did minimize my own experience though, as obviously an accommodating and structured environment was a huge reason as to why the person I spoke about is not as prone to these outbursts (only occasionally). However, it seems as though these parents also cultivated a very accommodating environment and the violence only got worse. That is what I should've said-- not that autism can't cause violence, but that it is rarely THIS extreme after taking the correct steps for years. I wish all the best.

[@ZiggyonMars]

Remember autism is a spectrum and it can vary in individuals. So while some autistic people may not be violent others are. I am high functioning and I had violent outbursts as a child towards other kids that bullied me. I did not know how else to express myself. I did learn to stop that behaviour after therapy and found how to communicate better and understand myself.

[@littleautibatsfantasybooks7593]

THIS!! thats right it is not normal behaviour for autistic people and as an autistic person i can say it definitely shouldnt be made out to be tht way. this is just sad and gross in so many ways. there is something else going on here. neurodiversity does not cause this.

[@kristingallo2158]

Not that they told you about anyways

[@kristingallo2158]

​@@littleautibatsfantasybooks7593but it does. Low self control

[@roterfrosch5808]

​@@ZiggyonMarsDid your bullies learn some adequate social behaviour, too?

[@mrs_pinkmist]

so so glad you all figured it out for now! things will change along the years. as long as its always in a positive direction, in the end, thats all that matters. for everyone involved. i wish there was more help in general for this. i know ppl who have lost their kids who have severe Autism , and been able to keep ones who werent on the spectrum. its so sad. such a tough battle because it certainly isnt lack of love. its just not knowing what to do or where to turn to for help sometimes ...

[@tanyabrown9839]

i myself are on the autistic spectrum and had the same issue in getting myself some help when I needed it with mental health services saying that they didn't deal with people who had autism (I was feeling suicidal at the time and they wouldn't even allow me to go to a mental health support group due to having autism.. so I faced discrimination over that). I'm in Sth Australia (and our states autism service when I was seeking help just offered me their library to seek help from).

[@theopulentone1650]

My best friends non-verbal autistic brother is like this. He doesn't live with the family and only comes to visit during holidays. He's just too violent to live with his family full-time.

[@francescogorbechov4192]

I hate being autistic. It’s a curse

[@torquetheprisoner]

it's like having a constant brain fart

[@GaypataponALT]

Same, we have people treating us like we have the mentality of an 5 year old, I hate the infantalization towards disabled people and I also hate how people use the word special on terms like“special ed” or “special needs”, it just feels like a white lie

[@jentealwaves]

I hope and pray he finds a happy balance, with the help of medication and therapy, to be able to control himself, and be a part of the family. And Thank God for his carers! Those guys need to be compensated heavily for all they do...because there's NO way someone takes on that career simply for the money...there must be a great heart involved! 💜💜💜

[@frances4007]

Autism is not a mental health disorder unfortunately here in the UK the mental health team’s cannot admit people with this disorder, not enough support out there

[@torquetheprisoner]

nor do they care

[@mirandamcmanus2097]

My nephew has autism with 2 other conditions adhd and dypraxia. We had some support when he was a teenager, clubs for special needs which he enjoyed at 18yrsold.everything seemed to stop. i asked for some support for him as a young adult. Was told he wasn't on the autism system and would pass on to the mental health team. Which I declined. I agree with you. Same words I spoke when I refused the referral to mental health. Autism is completely different and completed with different functioning levels for each person. Most have other disability dypraxia is a disability but some professionals say different. This is why mental health services are failing people to many are being referred when they need completely different care and support. If professionals would stop the textbook approach and speak out and support families with autism needs. Then some change might come. If nobody speaks or highlights, there needs no funding would been put in place for special care. I even had teams around me at a meeting saying they hadn't got it yet. We don't understand their needs yet. How could I work with a team for support and a care plan when professionals didn't understand his needs. This is in the UK. L.C.Council.

[@larryvonkrukenfeld2075]

That’s not true. Autistic people, even those without other conditions, are frequently sectioned in the UK and put in inappropriate hospital environments. It’s a real issue that’s been in the news a lot.

[@Tammissa]

I couldn’t do this, I commend these people who care for him. It must be so difficult. I honestly don’t think I could handle having a child this mentally ill.

[@Andrea-zm1nl]

My heart goes out to this family. The sad truth is that severe autism or any other severe mental disability doesn't give a person the right to be violent and this is the correct response to that kind of behavior.

[@dontbelongherefromanother]

There's nothing much that can be done to stop it

[@Andrea-zm1nl]

@@dontbelongherefromanother well, there actually is, but no one wants to hear the actual solution to the sheer amount of parents who are dealing with this and who are doomed to be parenting til the day they die.

[@danielleburke87]

​@@Andrea-zm1nlwhat's the soultuon no one wants to hear

[@CricketGirrl]

I'm a 50-year-old high-functioning, high-IQ (134) woman with Autism Spectrum Disorder. My meltdowns are uncontrollable. Until January 2024 when I was finally placed on a good medication, my meltdowns were also very aggressive. I am fortunate enough to have a family who took the time to be educated about autism. Meltdowns are not controllable, and anyone who says otherwise is misguided.

[@CricketGirrl]

​@@dontbelongherefromanother you are 100% correct. Autistic meltdowns can be prevented, but once started, there isn't a whole lot you can do about one. I'm 50 and am autistic. I wish I could control mine. The only thing that ever helped was medication.

[@barbbeulah7139]

Im so glad for you all, that you all are in a situation where you may thrive, this is a good thing😊

[@LiLi-is6ck]

Silas voice was so calming

[@kallettemika7308]

I could absolutely not. He'd be in a home so fast... I feel terrible for his parents. Theyre story is heartbreaking

[@jennieferris]

My heart goes out to your family

[@CaviarDiamondsss]

Everyone looked so much happier in the end! That’s what it’s about, his parents can breathe knowing he is safe and he can get the attention and help he needs from professionals, not saying his parents didn’t.

[@karifredrikson-lr1mm]

This is very sad. As Parents, you did what was possible. I hope you can have peace.

[@MP-gq2uy]

Of mice and men…… an outburst or misunderstanding can lead to horrible outcomes. He is big and could harm because his life isn’t to his order. The world doesn’t work that way.

[@megsmith6953]

YOU ARE GOOD PARENTS!!! sometimes you have to make tough calls to protect yourselves.

[@wmdkitty]

No. Good parents would have gotten him help right away, instead of waiting.

[@megsmith6953]

@wmdkitty Right away? so when he was diagnosed at 2 they would have sent him away for help. Obviously you're not a parent, and thank God for that!!! You'd probably ship your kids off without a second thought.

[@NakedMartinMartin]

​@@megsmith6953Not at 2 yrs age, but later. They didn't.

[@Linds-oz1oz]

@@wmdkittythey start with out of institution services like therapy, psychology, and ABA. They literally even mentioned the fact that he was on medication to try to help. What are you on about?

[@shaneekabatty-cross]

As someone who's autistic. I dont blame him for being violent. They do and don't know what their doing. They do to an extent, and it's a different understanding of what their doing. They do see it how you would see it.

[@Ozzy_Bitez]

My heartbreaks for his parents.