Perimenopause Update: I think I am over my doctor & NO biopsy update... yet.

[@laura10777]

That is SO frustrating! I recently had an appointment with a Dr who is supppsed to be menopause society certified, but is clearly not well versed on perimenopause symptoms. Have you watched Dr. Mary Claire Haver here on KZbin? I was also told I could not take HRT, but my eyes have been blown wide open! Agree - HRT is not the enemy.

[@kamloopscruiser874]

I was also going to suggest Dr Haver!👍❤️

[@tamarav6133]

I just got Dr. Mary Claire Haver’s book, The New Menopause. She was on Angie Hot and Flashy’s channel last week too. A lot of great information.

[@betsybabf748]

She does watch Dr. Haver. I just spoke with her about it when I recommended Dr. Haver's video with Angie.

[@MrKongsMom]

OH I have followed Dr. Haver for a while! Honestly she is the reason I am seeking the HRT out. She is wonderful!

[@BunngalowFarms]

I am so lucky to have a doctor who's my age and listens to me. She and I both are on HRT. Perimenopause symptoms are no joke.

[@CandleNurse]

I appreciate your vulnerability and sharing your personal experience. I am in AZ and had a similar experience with HRT. I had to have a hysterectomy at 35. When you said that when the doctor came in the room (when you thought you were getting a biopsy) terrified, anxious just to be told that you shouldn’t be there, it’s not going to be done, you should’ve gone to a radiologist, etc. brought me back to the two years it took for me to finally find a provider that would treat me. I felt emotional watching this. Unfortunately, we have a health insurance system and not a healthcare system. I am a nurse and in Nurse Practitioner school and I not only experience this stuff professionally, but I have experienced this personally and it should not be this way. It should be a standard of care to get a needle biopsy whenever any suspicious lump is found in breast to get answers and be ahead of any chance of it being more. Sorry for the rant. I completely support hormone balance. Your physical health affects your mental health. Hormone imbalances cause so many problems. Keep advocating for yourself and thank you for spreading awareness about this. It’s not talked about enough.

[@MrKongsMom]

It's an insurance system for sure, isn't it. It's been so hard to navigate. I wish this was all so much easier. At any rate I am so appreciative of you and everyone else sharing their experience. It helps me and others feel less alone I think!

[@lorainemcgillivray77]

Hi Melanie HRT isn’t for everyone but I was less than an ideal candidate due to endometriosis and multiple bouts of fibroids. My research indicated I should wait until I was a year after my last period ie fully menopausal (to allow the endometriosis to die off). I developed GI issues and as part of that stopped the HRT ,but plan to go back onto it once my GI stuff is sorted out. I had IBS for many years due to the endometriosis covering the bowel itself. I am awaiting CT results (chest abdo pelvis) to see if it has progressed to Crohns or at least a firm diagnosis of something currently. I’m going back on HRT if my diagnosis isn’t something nasty (which is not something I am expecting it to be as it’s an inflammatory issue in the main according to previous tests). I took the pills but going forward want another mirena coil and separate estrogen replacement. I had mirena coils that really helped the endo and wasn’t overly happy with the combined continous HRT tablets for me. Go to a gynaecologist or menopause specialist. However I would schedule the biopsy anyway just in case. Best wishes xx

[@betsybabf748]

I go through my gynecologist, not my primary care dr, for my HRT. I actually switched gyns because when my favorite gyn left the practice, the dr I was switched to said he only wanted me on HRT for 5 yrs total. When I said I wanted it longer term for heart health and for quality of life, he said they don't prescribe for that. I immediately found a new gyn practice. If he doesn't care about my heart health and my quality of life, then I don't care about paying into his mortgage and retirement savings. I love my new gyn. As for a biopsy, my good friend was put on that same two year watching plan for her lump. After 18 mo and 3 ultrasounds, she demanded a biopsy, and by then she had stage 3 breast cancer. She survived and beat it, but treatment was worse than it should have been if caught early. It's probably nothing but scar tissue, but you have a right to a biopsy to be sure. I would definitely find a good gynecologist.

[@jennh5647]

Yes keep us updated!! This is such a rough season of life and we are all trying to figure it out together. Thanks for being so transparent!

[@tinabush4418]

I’m in the same boat as you. Waiting to get an appointment with another doctor. The struggle is real

[@MrKongsMom]

UGH! Here's to a fast process!

[@carrieo8677]

You have every right to feel annoyed and irritated. I’m 47 and have been told by multiple doctors that I cannot take any form of HRT due to leiden factor 5 but I’ve recently heard differing opinions on that. So far, I’m just taking my symptoms day by day and forcing myself to just keep going. It sucks that your doctor is giving you such a runaround and it is horrible that women are treated this way due to a faulty study. I really hope you find a great gynecologist who will HELP you!

[@marlenellewellyn9987]

I just want to reach through the computer and hug you! I had a lot of the same symptoms and was put on 2 meds for it. 1 keeps the hot flashes away and the other keeps my periods away. I have a different solution I use for the ich and soreness in my ears. Getting older has not been fun for me either and it all started at 35 for me. Be glad it may only take a few months to find a Gynecologist, I waited a year in my country!

[@loriarnold6121]

OB nurse by trade here…advise to find a OB gynecologist practice that prescribes HRT. I’m on my way to that myself. I’m miserable too!! Sorry you’re going thru this friend!!

[@MrKongsMom]

Thanks... its a journey so many women struggle with. But I feel like at least more info is being shared now!

[@sapphirelady2]

HRT has been a godsend for me! I felt exactly the way you did and it was rough, I’m sorry you are going through it. Find a doctor who listens more closely to your specific situation.

[@andreaharvey5077]

I worked for one of the best Gynecologists in Dallas when I was younger and I have always gone to a Gynecologist. My primary care doctor told me he could do the exam once and I laughed 😂! Although he is a great PCP, I would never have him check my downstairs area. 😂. Keep us posted on this issue because I do not think enough people discuss this topic! I am seeing my doctor in June. Also, I went through a similar situation you described and I found out that caffeine can cause the issue of lumps, so I steer clear of caffeine the day of my mammograms.

[@giladddable]

Oh my god Melanie I love your videos so much. So light hearted and easy not over the top. Xoxo

[@sheliadennis9004]

I feel your pain. I have panic attacks and for people who have never experienced them it’s hard to understand. I am on HRT and have been for years. I can’t imagine not being able to get mine. Menopause sucks I thank God my Dr. doesn’t have a problem with me taking.

[@MrKongsMom]

I am so glad you are being supported! It makes such a difference!

[@PENNSMITHSKINCARE]

Omg Mel. Go to the Portland menopause doc. For F’s sake you DO NOT NEED TO WAIT 2 years!!!!! Wtf?! She has the most outdated info on HRT, short duration and 10 years is so ridiculous. Your bones, brain, skin, muscles and general health are counting on you to SWITCH DOCTORS.

[@MrKongsMom]

Oh for sure Penn. I am looking for gyns that take my insurance right now. It's such a frustrating process when you are trying to navigate what both the doc and insurance say you can do. I wish this was all so much easier!

[@hollymyers4665]

I am so sorry this happened to you. I personally use my primary care Dr for wellness and sick visits and see a specialist for all other care. My gyno is super supportive of HRT and runs a clinic for hormone therapy for both women and men. This has also been a journey for me. I tried the patches for a couple of months and it wasn't the best option for me. I would really like to try pellets, but unfortunately, I didn't contribute enough into my FSA and insurance doesn't cover them. (😡 I'm with you on how and why should an insurance company be able to decide what is best for MY body!?!?) This leaves me to ride it out this year unless symptoms are completely unbearable due to the costs. I pray that you find a supportive gyn who can guide you into feeling your best and getting your quality of life restored. 🙏❤️🙏

[@its_a_dandy]

I am so sorry you are going through this. I had endometriosis and a hysterectomy at 34. It took several doctors before I was diagnosed. I am a Pharmacist, so I know the system, and I just kept trying until I found the right doctor. I feel really bad for people who just accept what the first doctor says and continue to suffer. To be honest, when you first reported your doctor's treatment plan, I almost commented then because I really didn't agree with the drugs she was giving you. I didn't want to be "THAT" commenter and negative, but since you are not happy with the results, I feel OK saying it. The studies that scared everyone from HRT have been debunked, and some of the prescriptions she gave you have tons of side effects. I don't understand how restoring your body's hormones that were there naturally is not preferable to synthetic drugs that only put a band-aid on the symptoms. You may want to seek out a good Gynocologist or a functional medicine physician who specializes in HRT. I prefer seeing a HRT specialist because many GYNO's are more focused on pregnancy and childbirth and may not be up on the latest ideas and research.

[@MrKongsMom]

Thank you so much for commenting on this one. I wish you would have on the first one now too lol. But you live you learn I suppose. I just know now that she is not the person to see regarding this particular issue. She is a lovely lady but I think a bit too conservative when it comes to this topic. I am willing to accept the risks. But also maybe schedule me for the correct stuff lol, I truly thought I was getting damn biopsy only to pay a copay for a doctor to ask ME why I was there!

[@gramma6754]

So sorry, Melanie 😘

[@SueGreene-st7qc]

Hi Melanie, man, I’m so sorry you were going through all of this and you deserve to have a doctor that understands your needs and is on the same page with you. I have to say I am almost 20 years older than you and well through menopause, but I never went through any of the symptoms that you were describing, so I consider myself very fortunate. I did have breast cancer a couple years ago and had surgery but I am thankful that I never went on HRT anyway because it could have sped up the cancer growth I assume. Yours definitely does not sound like anything serious and I would think it’s worth a try in your case , good luck to you and thank you for keeping us posted as I was wondering how that was going .

[@MrKongsMom]

I am so glad you survived your breast cancer battle! How terrifying for you!

[@jeanniefarley]

I am a bit older and my obgyn actually offered me HRT. I declined because I had some thyroid issues. I feel like when my symptoms get worse i would definitely try HRT. I hope you get a second opinion because menopause and peri-menopause is so hard to go through. Im 48 so im a bit older. I think that's why HRT was offered to me. You need to do what is the best for you! Good luck because this is no walk in the park.

[@MrKongsMom]

Thank you for sharing that! It's certainly not right for everyone. That's for sure!

[@emmacharlenedostal]

Keep fighting the good fight Melanie!

[@MrKongsMom]

Oh absolutely!

[@amberr6589]

I’m sooooooooo frustrated for you and so sorry this is happening. Having a good relationship with your dr is important and I totally understand wanting to stick with someone you know. But, it seems that your dr. has forgotten something, it’s your decision to make not hers. If you are informed of the risks and benefits associated with a treatment plan and you are ok with those risks because the potential benefits are greater-than her job is to help facilitate that for you not obstruct.

[@joan6873]

Hi - I recommend Menopause Taylor on YT for additional information on menopause. She makes everything very understandable and has a lot of information to review. I've been on HRT for 5 years post menopause and it resolved all of my issues. Thankfully, I don't remember having a lot of peri-menopausal issues, but I'm sure there were a few maybe just not significant. I feel confident that it is beneficial for my heart and my bones. Heart disease is the #1 killer for women and there is not enough focus on prevention IMO. I have always seen a gynecologist for these issues as I feel they are probably the most knowledgeable and keep up with the ever changing recommendations and studies for female issues. Best wishes for a resolution soon, you have to be your own advocate and healthcare in the US makes you face a lot of hurdles for sure!

[@MrKongsMom]

You are right Joan. I need a gyn for sure!

[@zebralove2840]

Sorry this happened. Maybe look at it like your primary was actually trying to get you to the point of ruling out cancer faster by a biopsy, and the one yesterday roadblocked you because they don't biopsy grade 3. (separate issue why that wouldn't have been communicated to you earlier!) Just a thought that because Ob/gyns have high malpractice rates, they may be just as careful about prescribing hormones to someone with an unknown tumor. You might be in for more frustration depending on who you end up with. Good luck.

[@MrKongsMom]

Oh yes, I was looking to rule it out. I was there for a biopsy or so I thought. It was the strangest appointment honestly. But I am most upset about how long I wanted to get in with this person, paid the co-pay only to be told she only does surgical consults. I wish there was a better system in place.

[@nolita505]

Thanks for the update - been thinking about you. I agree another doctor would likely be a better fit for this type of care. Your current Dr may not prescribe the right dose (too low) and not feel comfortable giving you a therapeutic dose that would really help you - if you ever made it to that point with her. I’m sure with your research you can see what dose would help, and encourage you to go into your appointment armed with the knowledge of what you want to try so you can advocate for yourself. Hotandflashy has videos about her HRT dosage that I found helpful. Good luck!! 🍀

[@AliciaFannin]

I’m 46 and on birth control to control my endometriosis and it’s working great. My periods are so much better and less painful and I’m not having perimenopause symptoms- probably bc I’m on birth control pills. It also controls my PMDD and I’m just a happier person with less pain. Wishing you the best and take care of yourself.

[@HurshRoad]

If there was even a 1% chance of it being cancer I would want a biopsy. Primary doctors are not great for these issues so a gyn would be the best route.😊

[@MrKongsMom]

Very true. And that is why I thought I was there... such a huge waste of my time and ANOTHER copay. I am definitely annoyed.

[@HalfwayJac]

Oh wow. I’d be so pissed. I’m so sorry you are having to go through this.

[@laurawillis5972]

HRT has been life changing for me. Hope you find relief ❤

[@MrKongsMom]

Me too!

[@mollieschulman8872]

Hey Melanie! I hope everything works out for you ! I recently had an abnormal mammogram so I go for an ultra sound in the 17th…. I also feel young inside lol but then life throws you these lady things lol

[@MrKongsMom]

Sending you positive energy for a good result with your ultrasound! I know how anxious you must be in the meantime! The waiting is the worst.

[@mollieschulman8872]

@@MrKongsMom thank you so very much 💞 yes the waiting is the hardest part! Luckily they said that the results would be read immediately and I would know before I went home.

[@kamloopscruiser874]

I agree with second opinions! The research is coming in that HRT is beneficial. More benefits than risks. The old studies that worried a lot of drs have been debunked. Depending on her comfort level with HRT it could mean YOUR health and comfort are impacted. (Retired RN speaking) Also here in Canada we routinely get an ultrasound guided biopsy when anything looks odd on a mammogram plus secondary ultrasound that continues to show an odd bit.

[@dobcsek]

At 43 (nearly 44), I’m growingly interested in HRT. I’m in the UK and went to a OBGYN earlier this year and she advised me to try other things before I resort to HRT. She said I was too young to get HRT and that I have a family history of cancer. My mum died of cancer at 78 but she was obese during her life and this might have contributed to her cancer - who knows? My symptoms are still manageable, however I’m worried that the brain fog and the occasional rage will have a negative impact on my job security at some point. The weight gain is also annoying. I don’t know if I should wait until I get worse or to try to fix things before. It doesn’t help that - as you mentioned - there are so many contradicting information about HRT, even in the medical community, especially about how long one can take HRT. How am I supposed to decide??

[@MrKongsMom]

I know, the decisions are endless when it comes to healthcare sometimes and it can be really difficult to manage without the right physician. I too and starting to gain weight in the last 3 months, this is my newest thing. My diet has not changed and it's really driving me nuts. I really wish this was all easier lol.

[@HalfwayJac]

One of the frustrating things is, if you switch doctors, how do you know the new one will be any better and not do the same thing.

[@MrKongsMom]

Oh you are so right on there. This could be a long journey, but I have to keep trying. Life comes at your hard in your 40's lol!

[@melissastarbuck7553]

My insurance doesn’t cover naturopaths, so I pay out of pocket for my appointments. Dr Alison Schultz in Portland has been great with my HRT. I feel better, finally! But my insurance does cover labs and the prescriptions, so my only out of pocket is the doctor visits. Not too expensive for relief. Might be worth exploring an alternative medical model

[@MrKongsMom]

Our insurance does not either. I have such a hard time going out of network because we pay so dang much monthly for our insurance so I am trying hard to stick within the parameters of that. I have actually heard of her! But I think if this is going to drag on much longer I might need to rethink. This shouldn't be this hard with "good insurance" that we pay through the nose for!

[@melissastarbuck7553]

@@MrKongsMom Agreed, it feels like a scam sometimes!! She does botox too, fyi. I hope you get relief soon

[@MrKongsMom]

@@melissastarbuck7553 Thank you so much! May we all survive this time of life lol!

[@Faithb73]

You definitely need to find a naturopathic dr! And the dr you’re seeing now is inept in hormone therapy. She’s relying on the old nih studies still. There’s a whole generation of women (me included) that got screwed with hrt and it causing cancer. Completely wrong in those studies. It was the progestin that caused breast cancer. ( synthetic progesterone) please be vigilant in finding someone who will work with you. Even women who have had breast cancer can actually take hrt! Our health care system sucks and if you’re a woman, it’s even worse. I don’t get it!….p.s. my gynecologist (the one who stole my uterus😂) refused to ever put me on hrt because of those old studies. I went 12 yrs through peri/ and post menopause with not a lot of symptoms that were “typical” to have my now naturopath prescribe hormones for all the symptoms that I never even thought were due to menopause. It blows my mind how almost human I’m now feeling and it hasn’t even been 6weeks! She said we always NEED our hormones. You may not need estrogen because that fluctuates a lot in peri. But you should for sure get some progesterone cream or micronized pill to take. I bet it would make a world of difference. If they don’t prescribe that, you can certainly try a usp otc and see if it helps. It will not harm you. I started with that and my dr knew and approved.

[@georgiakolster4143]

Ugh! I’m literally over here throwing a hissy fit for you! 😮 I so feel your frustration! I’m not here to give advice, just to listen and praying you find a Dr asap that will help you. 💕 🙏🏼

[@bobbi8486]

I went to my primary because I just don’t feel good and haven’t for a while (I’m 45 and think it’s perimenopause). I was told I’m depressed and to see a psychiatrist. I never once said I was depressed during the appointment.

[@MrKongsMom]

Oh boy... not sure they could have handled your appointment worse than they did! Not everyone is depressed!

[@Lillylover70]

Well that's crazy . Go find a new Dr .

[@MrKongsMom]

Yup, for sure doing that!