pick me's of kpop

[@ari_ismynameee]

Honestly if there are any pick-me’s in K-POP, it’s the stans.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YESSS!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

[@ncteno]

no but seriously. the original term refers to a woman putting down another woman for a man. if you ask me, that sounds a lot like kpop stans.

[@tinyaliyahtv]

FR!!! THIS COMMENT DESERVES A HEART!!!

[@ashrise]

Preach, this comment should be pinned.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@ncteno Yes, Kpop stans are some of THE MOST NOTORIOUS hypocrites on this earth, it's sickening 🤮🤮🤮

[@ablackheartedblinkwholoves3259]

Literally saw a comment in wonyoung's video of her being cute "I don't act like her, her being too girly is pick me for me but I'm tomboy lol". Ok now y'all decide who the pick me is here

[@tolanisimpson5360]

THEY ARE THE TRUE PICK MES, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHO SAYS OTHERWISE. Their male faves will never notice them, they'll even laugh at these degenerates for tearing down an innocent girl for their male faves' attention. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@chhhyu]

@@tolanisimpson5360 FACTS. they literally bring down other girls for no reason😑

[@bellsgotitnowft]

BYE-💀 I'm convinced her hate comes from a bunch of 12 year insecure girls

[@EverythingxYourexNot]

I don't want to bully a probably 12 year old, but this person really needs to learn that feminine =/= bad. I know society teaches kids that all things girls like are stupid and should be laughed at, but that's bullshit. We should be girls supporting girls, girly girls supporting tomboys, tomboys supporting girly girls, and trans right all around!

[@lilaccrystalbunnyd3331]

@@bellsgotitnowft yeah but it's sad that insecure girls without attention of their parents could cause depression, anxiety or worse to innocent people who just want a place in the entertainment industry as their favorite idols (I mean 4th gen idols mainly)

[@chiquibombom1460]

Calling someone a pick me because of hip pads, crying at a funeral, and eating a strawberry screams ~”CHRONICALLY ONLINE”~

[@yourmom-yg4ei]

Chronically online people when they realise that other people have motivations in life other than peoples attention: :0

[@beomgrunge768]

This is worst than co 💀

[@elizabethc8478]

and pick me!

[@ablackheartedblinkwholoves3259]

Apparently girly and hyper femininity is the new pick me for k-pop stans meanwhile badass is the non pick me simple as that

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Yep. Utterly appalling. 🤮🤮🤮

[@TT-ee1vv]

True but here's the catch. Feminine/Cute male idols/male kpop idols doing aegyo are called "sassy" "my little meow meow 🥺" "cute" "breaking gender stereotypes ✨" Hyper feminine female kpop idol: "pick me🙄" "she has a bully aura" "snob" "rude" "cringe" "seeking attention".

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@TT-ee1vv True, their brains should be in the sewage as there's nothing inside them

[@pereznunez2480]

Ughh Ryujin's stans, I swear, they must be big pick mes in real life, always talking how Ryujin is so "different from other female idols" I know it is not her, it is her fandom but at one point I really disliked Ryujin and her whole image she is trying to portray, but I dsilike her fans even more.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@pereznunez2480 True, just disgusting

[@yemayacherry4708]

Kpop stans: let's protect minors Also kpop stans: bully wonyoung, leesso, 2016-17 yeri and garam smh

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Yes. Mentally deranged, sewage brain behaviour.

[@itgetsworse601]

Garam is still pretty much cancelled in korea, south korean have the zero bullying policy ..well unless ur a celebrity

[@itgetsworse601]

@Haewonnie cake shop (#real) y'know this is where koreans and international fans are conflicted: whether she did get the level 5 warning or not. If you go on any korean forum/platform concerning Garam you'll find that the documents are deemed legitimate and authentic but internationally, they're "debunked" and found to be a conspiracy

[@GamingBrowni]

@@itgetsworse601 yet people always forget to mention that Eunseo actually was assigned a level 7 punishment but she changed schools before she could take the punishment every time someone says "gaRAm gOT lEVel 5 pUNishmENT"

[@ashantythegreat3231]

@@tolanisimpson5360 First of all. Eunseo did child Pooorniitography, on garam's best friend *literally when grama was 12 and her friend probably too* eunseo posted it online on a hacked account and got it leaked, Garam found out about it, and confronted her verbally along with others students, it wasn't until two guys put them apart. Eunseo got a 8 or 9 level punishment, and garam got 5 for cussing at eunseo. But enseo got hers reduced to a lower punishment by switching schools. And garam got punished by the cussign by level 5. Eunseo moving at other school wasn't garam's fault, neither it was her getting bullied for posting a picture of another minor in only underwear. Eunseo wanted to ruin her career because garam let her get what she deserved? If garam never knew, the picture could be up and eunseo could never be confronted. She ruined her career by bullying scandals (which is like...13-6 idols a year get into the SAME scadal, and people STILL BELIEVE IT) which is like...people think they are seeking justice but grown ass adults and teens harrased her in many ways and bullied her, and eunseo did not do it privately, and she did nothing about it proves she wanted garam to get the hate. She was kicked out by company, by a bullied herself. Search yourselves than searching for one side of the story.

[@ncteno]

i'll never understand how kpop stans managed to twist the term “pick me”. if i'm not mistaken, it was originally a term used for women that put down other women for a man. it's not supposed to be used for something like eating a strawberry in a “cringe” way. yeri isn't a “pick me” for crying at jonghyun's funeral.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

I will NEVER get over how Yeri got called an attention seeker and a pick me for MOURNING AT HER OWN BEST FRIEND'S FUNERAL. Whoever said those demonic things deserves to ROT IN HELL for all I care!!

[@ncteno]

@@tolanisimpson5360 NO FOR REAL. the way they accused her of doing it for attention was SICK. absolutely SICK. she was MOURNING her friend of close to a decade.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@ncteno Just evil, soulless, psychopathic, degenerate, sociopathic and SATANIC

[@chhhyu]

@@tolanisimpson5360 exactly!

[@chhhyu]

people are crazy.. like what do u expect her to do? laugh or smile at jonghyuns funereal?? people r crazy.. I swear 🤦‍♀️

[@Callisto_52Hz]

FINALLY, someone who understands that the term "pick me" was created by black women to describe the women with internalized misogyny that put other black women down for not being ride or die's for black men. i'm so tired of people giving credit for the term to gen z tiktokers and claiming that they supposedly got it from that greys anatomy scene or some other equally ridiculous source.

[@Pookasoul]

I was one of those ignorant people who thought it came from Greys! Lol... so glad I found this video

[@verasambience]

@@Callisto_52Hz dude that word has been around for a long time. Where is your proof?

[@markovazz]

The term "pick me" is losing it's meaning 😭 kpop stans learn a new word and just run with it

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YES!!! AND I'm sick and tired of it!!

[@eina9063]

They didn't even bother to learn it, they just be saying shit 😭

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@eina9063 Honest to literal God!!!

[@ju5e3]

Kinda like how the word stan is used in a different way these days?

[@LovelyKissess]

Yes, like Stan 😔

[@smitaroy9080]

The biggest irony is that the ones calling Yeri or Wonyoung or Yuna "pick me" are the actual pick mes because they clearly are misogynistic.

[@lovelypeachy6493]

cry about it, leeseo is also in the list of pick me girls of kpop

[@smitaroy9080]

@@lovelypeachy6493 why would i be crying about it

[@lovelypeachy6493]

@@smitaroy9080 because im a pick me

[@smitaroy9080]

@@lovelypeachy6493 okay

[@Welchs-Fruit-Snacks]

@@benedettaaaaa_ That's just it. Women can breath and these people will hate on them and call them pick-mes.

[@pokoyooo7253]

i mean that girl from fromis being called a pick me for looking at sunghoon, yuna being called a pick me for looking at kai, wonyoung being called a pick me for looking at any guy…the fans sound more like pick me’s

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YESS!!!!

[@cinnannmon]

Wonyoung being called a pick me for touching hyunjins shoulder during that one stage when it was literally a part of the choreography 🙄

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@cinnannmon Hypocritical degenerates, I BET YOU they would do the same thing if they were Wonyoung in this situation, I know damn well I would, that man is FINE AS HELL!!

[@cinnannmon]

@@tolanisimpson5360 I’m saying 😭 that’s probably why they mad cause they couldn’t touch him and be close to him. Like girl, please unclench, wonyoung probably has a far better and higher chance at being with hyunjin (not shipping, just saying) than ya’ll ever will in a million light years 💀

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@cinnannmon Honestly, their male faves will never notice them and probably laugh at these sewage brained dustmites for tearing down Wonyoung for their attention

[@neo-jb7hi]

basically if she's extremely pretty she's a pick me

[@msterrific]

What😭 No she’s just cringe, many pretty idols that don’t do all that weird shit

[@Ososkkisksksmssmsmssmssms]

@@msterrificso basically, if she’s pretty and since she’s pretty people will try their best to convince themselves everything she does is cringe cause admitting she’s not is way too harsh on their hero complex, she’s a pick me?

[@msterrific]

⁠@@Ososkkisksksmssmsmssmssms⁠That can only apply to the misogynists who hate her. but think about it, majority female idols are pretty yet don’t face expulsion like Wonyoung or Yuna because what actually separates them from the bunch is their cringy behavior.

[@areanaangel8964]

Actually this is true! If someone is not conventionally attractive, they basically become invisible. Idk which one is worse when you're an idol and your dream was to be known. Everyone in IVE is so pretty but none of my male friends know any names besides Wonyoung + whoever they think is pretty

[@omarbirkdar5536]

Its the way yuna sang love dive and then got called pick me for it. Like excuse me, how is that pick me behavior

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Literally, just disgusting!!! I DESPISE THESE PEOPLE!!

[@chhhyu]

exactly, isn’t her job to sing anyway?

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@chhhyu Literally!!!!

[@inter.stellar]

@@chhhyu technically based on her positions, she's supposed to Rap, Dance and Attract Attention ( Visual ). So Yes but also No.

[@chhhyu]

@@inter.stellar positions don’t matter. EVERY single idols job is to sing. You don’t have to be a main vocalist, but you still gotta sing something.

[@divingintoive112]

It's crazy how Leeseo is 15 and Wonyoung is 18 and people asked them to 'grow up' over their behaviour (which btw, doesn't harm anybody) and yet there are so many older idols who's doing the same thing as them at the age of.... idk.... 22 maybe? And yet they are seen as "oooh so cute what a baby...." BULLSHIT.

[@ncteno]

right 💀💀

[@ncteno]

i don't want to be hateful, but why are people saying when taehyung does something cute that he's a “baby” and “cutie” but when wonyoung or leeseo does it they're pick-mes.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@ncteno EXACTLY!!!!

[@ncteno]

@@tolanisimpson5360 so sick of the double standard.

[@Ososkkisksksmssmsmssmssms]

@@nctenobecause double standard.

[@Chaewonsolostan]

The thing is this isn’t even a K-pop issue anymore, it’s an *EVERY FEMALE ON THE INTERNET* issue now. I seen a video of a girl getting called an “pick me” because she said she had small hands… I’ve seen another girl get called an “pick me” because she was dressed in pink. 😰 it’s scary how people are calling women pick me’s over nothing 😳

[@tolanisimpson5360]

THIS!!! People on the internet really bastardised the true meaning of the pick me. Now the word pick me is used to insult girls and women, it is appalling and disgusting.

[@Yoest.1]

What I’ve noticed with the kpop stans , they’ll choose whatever negative word to call a female kpop idol that they deem as too girly and too feminine for example, Yuna is always labels as a pick me , Wonyoung is labeled as some self centred mean girl and then Jennie is labeled as lazy , and the list goes on . The kpop community has something against women who prefer to act more girly and feminine

[@tolanisimpson5360]

This is farrr too true

[@jordy_nn]

@@norabeckwith6893 With Jessi, i's kinda different. Not that she should be shamed or called out of her name, but she is kind of problematic and people aren't as quick to defend her.

[@jordy_nn]

​@@norabeckwith6893 Jessi is nowhere near Cardi B/Nicki Minaj tbh, and I'm not even into rap music. Her whole career is based on trying to emulate a black woman. Even when she wasn't in Korea she grew up around wealthy white people. And yet her voice is completely different, she has had injections and surgery to change her body, she's trying to achieve one goal and that is to look like a black female rapper because that's the "trend". She's also ripped off a black woman's clothing line.

[@Carmaykela]

starting to notice it happen to sullyoon too it's always the like visual of the group or maknae.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@jordy_nn Thank you so much for saying this, it's embarrassing how they're even defending Jessi when she's LITERALLY KNOWN for blackfishing and acting as a negative stereotype of black women🤮🤮🤮🤮

[@aspiringheroine]

Did I expect a history lesson clicking on this video? No. Am I here for it? Completely.

[@echoeleos]

haven't completed watching the video, but the part where you talked about misogyny, especially internalized misogyny within the black community is very much similar in desi communities. women are supposed to treat their husbands as if they're god's another form while men can treat them like garbage and still be called the victim, praised by everyone for treating his wife like that.

[@lovelyjack]

Actually we can all agree that every race suffer from internalized misogyny and religion play a big role in it . Its just that some suffer from it more than others in terms of history

[@HannaAnsari2926]

Desi culture is so incredibly misogynistic that if a man doesn't mistreat his wife or actually treats her nicely then he gets labelled "Run Mureed" (Hindi word for Cuck) by his male peers and even family

[@ihop2001]

yea cause most cultures go through the same thing

[@bellsgotitnowft]

The fact so many Desi woman are brain washed into workshipping their husband will always be the most scariest to me

[@stephanieb5120]

The treatment of Yeri has been shameful since day one. During Dumb Dumb promos there was a moment when the group was looking at livestream comments and at one point someone commented that if Yeri didn’t stop seeking attention they were going to stab her between the legs. And she and the other members definitely noticed because the mood dropped instantly. They won on a music show a day or two later and Yeri burst into tears in a way that seemed very unhappy. Another thing regarding Jonghyun’s passing … Bad Boy was released only a month later and Yeri was struggling a bit with the choreography. (So was most of the group but the hate seemed to focus on her.) I won’t try to mind read here and say it was because she was distracted by mourning. I will say pretty much everyone watching knew she had just lost a friend in a horrible way so maybe we should extend her a little grace on this comeback. But nope, people just piled on with the hate. And I know this is literally her job blah blah blah but I doubt anyone is doing their best at their job just a month after a loved one dies. And at least most of us don’t have millions of people watching.

[@yutisima]

oh my god what the fuck

[@idkanymore12]

sometimes i wonder how life would’ve gone for her had sm taken their time and debuted her with the rest of the members. the amount of unnecessary pain and scrutiny she went through, even by supposed “reveluvs”, is sad.

[@Kawaiicarly]

What I really don’t understand is this behavior is the part of the reason Jonghyun, Sulli, and Goo Hara took their lives in the first place, do they not see how cruel not to mention dangerous this is for idols? It breaks my heart constantly that people can be so intentionally cruel to another human, especially a teenager who is grieving her older brother figure in the eye of the public. Yeri deserved so, so much better.

[@notwerkinginthishouse8634]

@@Kawaiicarly Even tho they were harsh to those idols, esp to Sulli & Goo Hara,in their lives, a lot of cruel things were happening, like Goo Haras mother not caring, Goo Hara being abused and asked for a tape by a judge, being slvt shamed by a male idol and bashed by fans But i get ur point Only if they would instead call out racism or homophobia instead of harassing idols for simply living their lives I bet they call themselves pro life but do this abuse to people of color.

[@keienn7259]

Haters will rationalize and say, "all of them were close with Jonghyun." But everyone processes grief differently. Not to mention, Yeri was only 18 at that time. I'm just glad to see her be in such a good place with herself now.

[@eunoia007]

I absolutely love it when you give us an entire history lesson to explain the weight of words or when you do extensive research of the roots of a word just to make us understand it better. Like sis finding your channel was the best thing I ever did as a kpop fan cuz trust me I would've been mislead so many times and I wouldn't have been half as informed of ANY of these words that you've explained to us. And your explanations not only help me filter out what type of content I should and shouldn't support but it's also helped me to not misuse and hurt people with these words. Thank you. Seriously thank you.

[@hinatahyuuga9182]

Omg I totally agree

[@eunhashoe1907]

Thank you for putting it into words, I think a lot of her subscribers share this experience, she has big sister energy

[@lunarlino]

So many of us kpop fans seem to have something against pretty successful girls in kpop and I don't understand it. Why can't we uplift other girls/women and cheer them on, especially girls from a country where all men seem to do is objectify and degrade them? We need a community cleanse PLEASE.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YESS, we really do and throw ALL pick me kpop stans in a dumpster fire while we're at it

[@naefirbre]

US? *4th gen boygroup stan

[@lunarlino]

@@naefirbre I said "us" as a way to hold our community accountable. A lot of people refer to the toxic stans as "them" to distance them from the kpop community and not hold the whole community accountable.

[@Ri57490]

The majority of female kpop idols are pretty and/or successful. They don't all get hate. The kpop industry has more of a hand in fan reactions than you think. they're under-training visual members and throwing them out there to debut, knowing full well that fans will roast them.

[@hannatuibe8491]

@@Ri57490 No like read your comment a second time and like let it sink in. Then ask yourself, 'should I have posted this comment?' I'll let your conscience be your guide after that.

[@puck2470]

Also wasn't Wonyoung 14/15 when she first appeared on the public kpop scene? Like even if she was 30 that's not an excuse for fan's blind hate but she was literally a child! (edit: also as far as the voice thing goes - we all do the customer service style voice when we're working and then turn it off when we're not! This is a thing in the service industry. It's a performance, because the service industry is performing)

[@Snstsnst]

She was 13

[@puck2470]

@@Snstsnst Jesus fucking Christ. What is wrong with people.

[@bellsgotitnowft]

I'm sick and tired of Wonyoung's hate every single time I see anything related to her wheather its a picture or video there are ALWAYS hate comments

[@chhhyu]

FOR REAL. I swear, I saw someone hate on her for literally BLINKING. Doesn’t every human need to blink?!?! Like wtf!!

[@bellsgotitnowft]

@@chhhyu SERIOUSLY last night I saw a Instagram reel where she was dancing to "that that" by Psy and she was winking (she was so adorable) And the WHOLE comment section was filled with hate saying "Why does this pick me winking so much omg fake blah blah blah shsjxhxbxjxjh" Like seriously imagine being so fragile you get offended by someone winking I don't even have any words 😭

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@chhhyu Even more mentally deranged behaviour, they literally have sewage for brains

[@TT-ee1vv]

@@bellsgotitnowft Kpop stans are getting too comfortable insulting her. Anytime they see Wonyoung receiving compliments they feel the need to pick her apart. It's getting too much.

[@bellsgotitnowft]

@@TT-ee1vv I agree like bruh her hate is making no sense like how can you despise a person so badly for just doing what? Winking? Eating a fruit? Enjoying her life? How insecure are these people?? It's beyond my mind's limits that a person can be THIS much insecure and hateful to the fact they nitpick every single thing of others

[@Layla-td1pl]

I had a friend in high school who was a "pick-me." "Pick-mes" do not hide their intentions nor are they ashamed, you'll know one when you see one. Yeri, Yuna and Wonyoung are not pick-mes. They label female idols attention seekers because they're jealous. The thought of their fave male idols interacting with these girls bothers them because they can't catch the attention or will never meet the one(s) they view as "boyfriend/husband material". But on top of that, these female idols are beautiful. If they recognize their beauty, then surely their fave male idols/others do too and thats where the resentment comes into play.

[@aplaraujo250]

The amount of unoccupied people on internet is insane. Thank you for another well explained video.

[@chiaralinnea4335]

it truly is astounding

[@theanti-veela-leprechaun]

I got called a pick me all the time at school. My schoolmates wrote it in my locker. I had girls refuse to be friends with me because I was a “pick-me.” Literally all I did to deserve this was when we played any game that was guys vs girls I switched over to make the teams even. I remember crying to my teacher begging her to tell me what I was doing wrong to have no friends. My childhood sucked.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

I'm so sorry those degenerate, mentally deranged bitches did that to you, you ARE NOT a pick me, THEY ARE THE TRUE PICK ME'S. They were definitely jealous you got to be with those guys, I hope you're in a much better state of mind.

[@chhhyu]

:( sorry abt that, those people do not know what a pick me is😭 lmao, hope u r fine now.. dont worry abt them!

[@M5FTZ]

They’re probably jealous cuz u were with guys and they couldn’t even get close to one

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@M5FTZ Yep, that's what I said in my above comment!!

[@lallygamer4062]

@@slurp4495 I would say a few years. Not sure though but I heard it for a while not to me but in general.

[@arwa9715]

When it comes to yeri, I remember people were upset she "took away" Joy's maknae title!! It had them riled up

[@bakageyama222]

@Josh Miguel Borromeo once again you don’t have to put joy down to make yeri seem good 🤣 Im speaking the truth here don’t come at me 😠

[@chhhyu]

kpop stans are crazy.. they call every girl a pick me for breathing😭 like i literally saw someone hate on Wonyoung for blinking..

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Degenerate, mentally deranged behaviour.

[@beasttitanofficial3768]

People attacking Yeri for crying at Jonghyun's funeral was so fucking extra. I cried when I read the news Many many many people all over the world cried. He was very loved.

[@nuages8915]

I would literally burst into tears randomly for like 2 weeks

[@jonathantam1436]

Holy shit you popped off. Kpop stans are so chronically online and I think it doesn't help that now the world is so international where slang and word etymology evolves at mach 10 that it was almost inevitable that phrases like pick me girl becomes so grossly misused.

[@baeah3021]

saw people calling lisa a pick me because she said she likes to wear men's clothes... to be clear that is women taking the stance that a woman wearing traditionally masculine clothes is anti-feminist 😭 and then 90% of the other girls called pick me's are hyperfeminine so i guess their message is dont be masculine because you'd just be trying to appeal to guys but also dont be feminine because you'd just be trying to appeal to guys ☠

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Chile, people these days call women pick mes for ANY DAGGONE THING!!! It's tiring and annoying!!😒😒😒😒

[@Beautyfaerie-bff]

Then these same idiots call themselves tomboys

[@chiaralinnea4335]

Idols really need to become savvy of their industry in order to stand out, get recognised for their work and ultimately, succeed in their career, especially with companies acting shady and being exploitative. Yet some of them are debuting as literal 13-year olds, how can we even expect them to act like full on professionals? Of course they are going to act cute and relatable 24/7 in order to keep up a good image. And it's worrying how people hold it against them, calling them out for being "superficial" or "looking for attention"...well, duh!

[@Carmaykela]

and some naturally are that way like wonyoung has always been over the top cutesy even the izone members used to tease her for that. People used to try to say shi back then too people forget that she was just a kid because of her height and was very harsh on her. I had to deal with something similar as a kid were i was supposed to act more mature because i looked more mature cause of my height. But she only just turned 18 she is still a kid and will still have some of her child tendencies (which i hope she keeps since it isn't harming anyone she is very responsible otherwise so) and some things will change as she grows older.

[@moonsoda9930]

I cannot get over the fact Yeri got hate for debuting late, like she had any choice over that, and crying over her friend's funeral.... HELLO?! Y'all are heartless and insane if you thought that was ok

[@justinehercthehuman]

What's funny is that these stans using the term "pick me" left and right are the ones that think they're like Wednesday Addams and that they're different from everyone when they're all the fckng same, secretly wanting men's attention.

[@areyoukirringmeirriyaa]

SO TRUE I CANT STAND THEM

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@areyoukirringmeirriyaa Same, they should go throw themselves into the sewage and be mute forever!!!

[@kaibutsu2903]

Unrelated to k-pop, but the story around the "pick-me" term really changed the way I looked at a personal situation and I'm really thankful for that. Long story short, I (white-passing European woman) was in a relationship with a black American man. He broke up with me with some excuse like "you don't give me enough time because of your studies and I don't want to hurt you". Later, I discovered he has in fact been engaged for 3 years with a black American woman who's aware he goes to other women and manipulate them (so yeah that was wild lmao). They've been together for like 5 years and he made her go through some rough shit (left her to get engaged with another girl, then got back with her, cheating on her the whole time, etc) but she stays with him and lets him do what he wants. Even wilder, I've seen her make tweets like "when my man's side b*tches discover my existence" like she's proud of it. I couldn't comprehend how she was so ok being with such a man and hurting other women (including woc as he lied to some as well) at the same time, but now I understand it better. I'm really grateful for this insight.

[@Teddy-Bear953]

Girl i respect your patience with that guy i hope you are in a better place mentally now, May you achieve all the goals and dreams you have for yourself. 🫶 you deserve better. and about that woman who got back to him each time, lack of self esteem and self worth makes you like this honestly and it's not her fault i guess. this is a systematic brainwash women endures from society just so that they would only serve "some" undeserving men.

[@kaibutsu2903]

@Rehma Ali Thank you 🧡 I'm still struggling but I'm doing my best. I understand why the girl got back with him and forgives him again and again (and Cheryl's vid explained a bit further how this behavior can be linked to the black community), and I feel bad for her that she can't recognize her worth ; but I can't excuse her for being "proud" that her man hurts women, that's frankly fucked up :,)

[@anukataiga6730]

The author of this video ate an left no crumbs 👏🏻

[@wonyo8382]

yuna deserves more love, she is so talented, her singing, rap, dance, and performances are excellent, she deserves more recognition for her talent

[@Ososkkisksksmssmsmssmssms]

How about we all just agree that “pick me” should be banned from K-pop stans.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YESS, I would die happy(exaggerated, of course)

[@guadalupemontoya1819]

Start off by saying that as a long time Shawol, December 2017 was probably the darkest time in my life. The fact that people could take a young girl crying, which I had been doing nonstop since the moment I saw the news, because someone as important me as Jonghyun was, when she actually knew him, and twist it like they did filled me with a rage I can never quell. I subsequently adore Yeri and take any attack on her personally. And every girl mislabeled a pick me will automatically have me on her side. I love this video and I love the message, but I’m going to be honest and say that I don’t expect the message to reach far enough. Maybe I’m a pessimist, but I think if you have stuck with everglow-up to this point, you are a logical human being who probably wouldn’t be throwing around the term ‘pick-me’ or you are someone who wants to comment something negative anyways and everything has gone in one ear and out the other. But I appreciate that Cheryl will always do her best to inform people with these videos, call out the hypocrisy, and subject herself to the abuse of the haters for the sake of getting the truth out. Many thanks 🙏

[@daniellaenisan3587]

The amount of research you do is amazing. I don't think i can ever have a KZbin channel cause of how impressive you are.

[@Thildia]

the people who say "It'S JUst mY OpINioN" obiously never got further education, because in an actual essay you have to justify and give sources for E-VE-RY-THING

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Honestly!!!

[@seulmiseforever9603]

“It’s Just My Opinion” them saying that while being hateful will forever be funny to me 🥹

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@seulmiseforever9603 True. Mentally deranged sewage degenerate behaviour

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@RossoAmareno Did I lie?

[@egg4330]

@@tolanisimpson5360 HAHAH U ARE SO REAL

[@Audiophile979]

Can I just say that I recently discovered Red Velvet last year and when I saw their earlier work WITHOUT Yeri I frikken cringed. She's not even my bias but I love her so much, she's so kind and interactive with the other members and without her, for me, it's just not Red Velvet.

[@chaepew1949]

The way people think being a bit cringey is equal to them trying to get male validation is just dumb. It's a reflection of your own self and your inner thoughts, really.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

Honestly.

[@velvetsluv]

How can someone have so much hatred towards yeri simply because she DEBUTED LATE like wtf?!!

[@Terry_Bell]

Conclusion: the actual pickmes are the stans accusing female idols of being pickmes

[@zeusmultirotor8479]

You had me at "no black woman wants to be Bob The Builder"

[@marinaborges]

your presentation skills are on point 👌

[@everglowup]

Tyty 💚

[@chibamu]

just thought about how wonyoung and yuna would probably get a lot of hate for that cute gomen song challenge while kpop boys are getting so much praise for that

[@IceQueen975]

It's not just in kpop: if you don't adhere to a Certain Narrative online, you're called a "pick me". At this point it's obvious that if you call someone a "pick me", you're the actual pickme.

[@Terroroki]

im a huge wonyoung stan but here’s the funny thing. i used to despise her. But it wasn’t because i hated her in my own merit, it was the things i saw about her that impacted my opinion on her before i even got to know the girl. But after i got to know her, i realized that there was really no reason to hate her.

[@egg4330]

This comment literally shows how 90 percent of wonyoungs haters tend to base their opinion of her based off of edited or taken out context clips and scenes, they barely ever actually take the time to review Ive content and her relationship with her members. Anyways glad you managed to make your own opinion of her 😼

[@scarletjems7040]

​@@egg4330 literally. Because I need someone to be mad at because they are unhappy. And others just follow along just for fun or they can't think for themselves.

[@superbowl-taylorsversion0325]

I lost my grandma a few months ago and I cried buckets. She lived in another country so we didn't see her a lot. The last interaction I had with her was 7 months before her death. I can't imagine being close to someone and seeing them as an older brother and then they take their life because of the job they have which is ALSO your job and you cry at their funeral and get hate for it. All those haters calling these poor girls so called "pick mes" should grow up and get a life.

[@FloraDLady]

These stans would gouge their eyes out, cry, punch the floor violently if they saw 2009 Sunny.

[@kurotsueki]

I never thought I would be so fed up with toxic K-POP stans like I am now. Last year was a huge dumpster fire of toxicity. I just hope this year is a little bit better. Anyway, loved the video; you always kill these. Love your thoughts, opinions and what you have to say about a situation. Keep the good work, Cheryl.

[@preciousokorie]

And that's exactly why I suddenly made a choice to not belong in any fandom. I don't want to be associated with any of that toxicity. I just want to come, listen to good music, be wowed by amazing choreos, and get on with my life.

[@kurotsueki]

@@preciousokorie Fr fr. One of the best decisions I've made so far.

[@kurotsueki]

@@joshmiguelborromeo1217 Well, it's not what I was saying in my comment. I just said that I "hope this year is a little bit better" and not that all toxicity to stop, because that's just impossible. I don't think all toxicity will stop just because I want to, or because other people want to. I was just expressing how I wished it was "better". And I have my own way of dealing with toxicity. I just ignore it and I go back to listening music and enjoying the stages. That's all. I'm not trying to change the K-pop community. Just wishing it was better.

[@zeusmultirotor8479]

Also "seeking attention" is a weird accusation towards celebrities whose job is literally to be noticed so they can sell various products including but not limited to music

[@hana-qs3xj]

I don't always agree with you on everything, but god is it nice that you'll always give a measured, logical take on everything. no matter my personal opinion on anything you say, I go into every video knowing I can respect whatever take you have bc you always express your opinions well and don't give in to stupid hate bandwagons or pressure from other people. every time you release a video it's the highlight of my day! I wish all kpop fans had the same basic respect to human beings and ability to have level-headed, evidence support opinions as you (and respect to people who respectfully disagree!). the community in general would be so amazing if we could all manage that lol

[@serenitysubs933]

Remember when the 'Not like other girls.' was rebranded to mean anyone who looks inately different? That's when the tomboys were targeted Now it's the girly girls being targeted with this pick me BS.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

THIS!!!

[@akamesb4540]

True, is so dumb

[@sasidunee1570]

Literally wony eating the strawberry different and eating elegantly…she’s meant to look good and camera…it’s her fricking job as an idol, she’s this image of being perfect and sweet and cute (imo this image makes her look like an airhead to ppl who don’t know her which ISNT true she is very dedicated to singing and lays so much attention to detail and she’s very smart and talented, the complete opposite of an airhead). many other idols, especially female idols eat this way too because it’s their job to look good too…idk why wony gets hate over eating a strawberry ffs

[@luvrsie143]

when i was twelve, i lost my father. and it kills me to know that yeri got absolutely harassed online for crying at a funeral. it's disgusting behaviour

[@BillionairesArentYourFriends]

My fiancé loves me for being bubbly and so very much peppy-feminine, but in the world of kpop, I'm clearly looking for the attention of other men by showing affection to mine. Not all, but most of this kpop 'culture' of hating pretty women is perpetuated other women. It seems growing older is the only thing that wakes people up from their bullying nowadays. If it doesn't, I don't know what will. Teenagers suffer, it makes sense they lash out. That's why it's important to be patient as well- honey/bee analogy. Such is common that the hearts and souls of young females are plagued with self esteem issues. Be kind to those who are unkind. Not to be cliché, but... Just be genuine to yourself. Everyone acts different. So just be you.

[@lovelylanafansweetie4240]

There’s this video on KZbin called Hollywood demonization of hyper feminine women it’s honestly such an educational video I recommend it

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@lovelylanafansweetie4240 Yes, I loved that video

[@Ri57490]

90% of female idols are pretty, and they don't all get hated on. It's not simply about looks.

[@Anjan_-]

No honey it's not cliché cause k-pop stand need to learn it

[@scarletjems7040]

​@@Ri57490 I don't know what world you live in but at some point all idols get hate for random and different reasons. But what she is talking about is correct.

[@LemonRose59]

I'm just thinking if Yerim didn't cry at her friend's funeral people would drag her for being a heartless monster like " your friend is gone and you are not going to shed one tear ?? "

[@ingusch3783]

Now you went OFF! Loved this discussion and that you shed some light on the history of the word. I have some 7th-grader k-pop-stans in my Spanish class and overheard them call another girl a pick me the other day, so I talked to them about it and what the term actually means. It's shocking, but I remember that at their age, I also sometimes heard words, thought I knew what they meant, and ran with it. The only key to this is educating yourself and others. So thank you for your service! 💜

[@shanab.7881]

Stuff like this, among other things, is why it’s so hard to talk about serious issues in the kpop community. A lot of stans use words that they don’t understand and don’t know how to have normal discourse. What’s worse is that the fanbase is mostly female, and yet so many are way too comfortable treating other women like trash when they feel threatened by an idol’s or rival group’s success, looks, etc. There’s a lot of toxicity in the community that idols are trained to accept and can’t defend themselves against, and some fans take advantage of that. These will be the same ppl cosplaying as feminists online as if they didn’t just run down a female idol for the dumbest thing. It’s so hypocritical but so common unfortunately.

[@martyramser]

crazy how they're all maknaes too. it's almost like people hate young girls.

[@AnzzCheatedOnMarkWithHaechan]

Thank you for putting it right, Wonyoung isn't a pick me, more like. Perfectionist, I always noticed she always wanna look the best and give the best image of her, even tho this could be harmful to her life but it's not as creepy or as weird as people make it to be, on the other hand I always saw yuna as a child, she debuted young sue really went through puberty in front of cameras that's why sometimes she does questionable things but of course what are you expected from a teenager

[@lt2511]

When I'm sleep deprived I'm shock by sounds, confetti, surprises and people who are behind me. Being sleep deprived and exhausted really puts me off guard no matter how hard I try to not react. People should not hate idols for having a human instinct.

[@scarletjems7040]

Literally.

[@Mr_DPZ]

25:01 - Closest thing to pick me boys I can think of would be "nice guys." Not "nice guys" as in guys who are nice people, mind you, but guys who label hating any man who has had any success in getting a girlfriend whatsoever an asshole and complain that women should date "nice guys" like them instead. Also, Yeri seems like such a sweet and charming girl and anyone who harasses her should be slapped across the face with a live barracuda.

[@tolanisimpson5360]

I fully agree with you, especially the first paragraph, those lowlife creeps who call themselves "nice guys" also are mentally apatheid enough to believe women and girls owe them sex/recipocated feelings for being supposedly "nice" to them. And when those women/girls reject their advances, those so called "nice guys" slutshame them for rejecting them and say nonsensical bullshit such as "women/girls only want guys who treat them badly" or the ABSOLUTELY worst case of all in this context, these so called "nice guys" r@pe those women/girls who reject their advances.

[@mani-ei5kq]

Pick me boys are basically "nice guys" with slightly more manipulation. Pick me boys act depressed and insult themselves so they can get attention from the girl they like. I think "nice guys" tend to vary on that spectrum; some seem like completely normal people at first or send off creepy vibes from the very beginning

[@tolanisimpson5360]

@@mani-ei5kq Yes, that's true

[@Ri57490]

And men don't call out 'nice guys' but they call out women for choosing 'nice guys'. Men never get held accountable.

[@Mr_DPZ]

@@Ri57490 I'd argue it's more that the 'nice guys' never call out the people they deem to be 'assholes,' but they call out women for choosing 'assholes.' Essentially, I'm talking about a less scary version of an "incel."

[@wonyo8382]

for wonyoung, the voice tone change is just her adjusting to what her JOB as a mc requires, i work with the public and i use a different tone with clients unconsciously and everyone else does. now I'm sure her haters haven't worked in their life and they're dragging someone that's been working since 13

[@HopeeInk]

The Yeri situation is infuriating to this days, *y’all owe her an apologize!!* As a shalow, the moment I heard the news, my world fall apart. My bias just died and I didn’t left my bed much for 2 weeks and cried uncontrollably. Look I didn’t even know this man, imagine being not only good, but close friends with that person and they about to put him to rest and you never see him again. Girl if y’all found some tears dramatic, I would be an entire broadway production, watch me face planting into that hole without second guessing myself at all. Her reaction was normal, not even because of her age, but the circumstances. Let that woman breath and apologize.

[@OblongPlanet]

If K-pop had pick me’s I’d pick them

[@sukaitodd2510]

"Your faves have had more injections than you've had good, decent grades." - These are absolute facts. I relate to this, being a student myself working towards good grades. Thank you, Everglow-Up for speaking the truth.

[@slayygela]

21:13 MY MOM DOES EXACTLY THE SAME THING LIKE- ITS ALMOST SCARY HOW MUCH HER VOICE CHANGES. Also!! About the voice change, when i was working at a local bookstore my voice was like an octave higher than normally cause it’s easier to sell books to people if your voice is nicer lol

[@jenna2440]

very interesting video. I knew about the relationship between "pick me" and women's internalized misogyny but it was interesting to hear your take about how this affected the black community

[@ludofratta2328]

Not my eyes getting watery as you retold the funeral makes me still confused as to how someone can have so little sympathy

[@CheShiny]

1:55 top 10 rappers Eminem was too afraid to diss (sorry I had to😭)

[@theyutazen]

I’d say pick me boys are a thing, though it might have been a trope that got misused from the original meaning, who knows, I see it a lot in TikTok povs (credible source ik lol) but apparently what I learned is that a pick me guy is a guy that will make you feel sorry for them so women can give them a chance. It’s also happened to me a couple of times. Like how pick me girls become misogynistic to gain male attention, men will turn into a white knight and say phrases like “oh, well, I bet you don’t find me attractive anyway, I guess I’ll continue to be alone”. Like it’s stuff like that. They will put down other men and tell women that they will be better. And then obv when you don’t give them a chance they lash out on you and call you terrible names. Basically the r/niceguys subreddit on Reddit. These were my observations but there could totally be another definition to depict pick me men or there might not even be one at all! Idk but that was my understanding of pick me boys

[@PraiseJ-Pope]

Damn, i came for the kpop and stayed for the savage. Thank you for educating us, I didnt know the roots of the term "pickme" and it seems like in my feminist circles it is used correctly (not only for black women) for women who throw other women under the bus and do anything to get male attention. Like the whole "i'm not like other girls" but ×10

[@FlowerArtzy24]

People are forgetting how much words can hurt and how it can effect a person’s behavior for the worst

[@fjnxtgdjsjeeh6073]

imo this is just another form of misogyny, these terms are only used on "hyperfeminine" girls and implies everything they do is to get the attention of men. it's also very weird that the female idols who are somewhat masculine or tomboy never get this kind of hate, and men never get called pick mes even if they have similar cringe behavior....

[@idkchar]

yes. the best way to let out all your emotional trauma is to hate on teenagers who cry at funerals, use emojis, have reflexes, eat pizza in a commercial and don't speak foreign languages with people who aren't fluent in said languages. smh. our society is broken.

[@penidk]

After watching this whole video I have come to the conclusion that the fans are the pick-me Everything they do falls into the definition

[@tolanisimpson5360]

YES.

[@apriledega3261]

"Itzy had a win , Sunghoon had the throphy". Period

[@dallunatic]

The whole "Yuna wears hip pads she a pick me" like... gurl. MOST WOMEN IDOLS WEAR HIP PADS. just saying.

[@allinonechrista]

This is a great video Cheryl! I agree that none of the girls you've mentioned are "pick me" girls. I don't think that any female artist in Kpop that's been called a "pick me" is one. I just don't get why people can't just simply enjoy the music instead of getting upset over the way someone eats a strawberry. You are absolutely right that these people NEED to find a better use of their time. They could be spending that time volunteering in their community and helping other people, they could be learning another language, they could get a hobby, they could even just watch a TV show - but to spend time hating on people because the emojis they use is just ridiculous. Thank you for making this video, I love hearing your perspective on these topics! And I really love the new intro too. I hope you are happy and healthy and I hope you will have an amazing day!❤️

[@viki7268]

Go off Cheryl. These stands as are unhinged.

[@taychrissy9273]

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. I know it’s been years, but a loss of a child and the loss of a friend is alway heart breaking to me.

[@yanwsl]

the free falling song and kermit😭😭😭

[@skyofbob]

20:53 have people never heard of code-switching? it's when you change your behavior depending on your enviorement, it's completely involuntary and normal especially among marginalized groups(like women or black ppl)

[@marinaborges]

that was a BIG strawberry, just get over it people

[@duqial]

The recipe for an idol being cancelled is fans feeling insecure I suppose. The whole 'pick me' trend and Lucas's scandal are the prime examples of that. Some people are ready to start hate trains just because they feel threaten by sb's success.

[@LovelyKissess]

So true

[@CaraTheStrange]

Came for the k pop content, stayed for the education on black culture or at least an aspect of it im not trying to create a monolith cause everyone is an individual

[@Pain-yx1ri]

I love your commentary!! Perfect balance of humour and seriousness! Thank you for your effort❤

[@kisskamm6631]

i like the way you set these kpop essay videos and your voice is very easy to listen to☺️

[@amalben27]

Now I used to be a "kpop stan" mostly from 2016-2020 , I was an ARMY and occasionaly would listen to other groups that I liked at the time ( blackpink , everglow , exo , dreamcatcher....) anywho after 2020 I stopped listening to kpop all together until summer of 2022 where I was introduced to aespa-illusion , this song really attracted me and I found myself diving back to the world of kpop and lemme tell you IT HAS CHANGED BIG TIME , now I might be off topic here but what I'm trying to say is kpop has changed a lot since the last time I was involved with either the community or the industry , the groups and morals changed a lot , kpop used to be songs that were fun and catchy along with songs that had a deep meaning and you could spend hours listening to , also the community I'm not saying kpop fans weren't toxic back then but all I'm saying is kpop fans are now toxic more than ever ( body chaming , calling minors pick me's , hating on literally anything an idol does ) , every single kpop video's comment section is a circus at this point . I will never be involved in the kpop community again because things are just getting worse by the minute . Anywho I do hope that the kpop industry gets fixed because I seriously miss the old days , and I wish success to all groups out there , also PLEASE stop fanwars you guys are fucking stupid ; bye

[@ourhaven]

I have learned so much from this video essay and thank you for providing quality information like this ❤️

[@nuages8915]

I still think sm shouldve annouced red velvet were 5 from the beginning, wouldve saved her from a lot of hate

[@heartfeltlovelyamethyst]

toxic K-pop logic: If you're feminine or cute you're fake, if you're masculine or a tomboy you're relatable and real. Now who is the pick me here? The people doing their job or the toxic stans

[@senu.]

I've been called a pick me for the way i sneeze and talk. I feel for those girls people are insane. i didn't know the funeral one.... psychopathic behavior women can't even grief in peace now.

[@nuvwaa6074]

Gen z learnt word pick me now they are using that to everyone

[@SatraninaLane]

The voice change thing is so true. I have what my friends call my 'customer service' voice, I've worked many service jobs. When I am talking with my friends my voice is a little deep and kind of monotone but when I am around customers I talk in a higher register and with a more bubbly tone of voice. I've never been called a pick me to my face but learning the history of the term was so fascinating. Also the chip thing, I can not open some packages of snacks, I will jokingly say 'it's child proof' and either cut it open or give it to someone around me to help me.

[@shriyamakeupvanity9166]

Also doing little harmless things to get someone's attention is very normal 😭i can't remember the amount of stupid things i have done to get the attention of my crushes

[@AnzzCheatedOnMarkWithHaechan]

I don't understand how people can hate Somi, we barely get to see anything of her, she's on her own world, people just hate how happy and successful she's cos tbh I have no other explanation