The Failed Masculinity of Gollum

We analyse what Gollum's mythological archetype can teach us about the path of being a good man.
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[@PilgrimsPass]

Life can be difficult and our moments of motivation are often temporary and eventually fades away but so do the dark moments. As long as we keep moving forwards rain or shine we'll have lives worth living. We thank BlockerX for sponsoring this video. Click blockerx.onelink.me/oeB0/pilgrimpass1 to install BlockerX and start your journey to end porn addiction.

[@DanielHubb360]

Or get yourselves a wife and save your sex drive for her!

[@CLDJ227]

Perhaps this video was something I needed to view and hear today. Thank you Pilgrims Pass, hope and pray all is well with you 😎.

[@barbarabaker1457]

Cool sponsor. I'm still too small to pay advertisers and doing percentages at present but I'll certainly look into sponsoring you properly when I get farther along, if my stuff is of interest some day.

[@Spur-li7ec]

Thx for another great video, mate! Do you permanently live/travel in europe now? Let me know if you need anything in Germany ;)

[@theinquisitionsparrot6749]

Hello my favorite crusader! Please take care.

[@Lady_de_Lis]

As a recovering addict, I think Gollum's dual personalities perfectly displays an aspect of addiction. Back when I was still in the thick of my addiction, it often felt like I was getting possessed. My rational mind would be telling me, "No, you don't need it. No more." But another part of my mind that desperately wanted to indulge would fight endlessly to take control of me until I gave in. And then moments afterwards, my rational mind would be back at the forefront again, feeling so ashamed at my lack of willpower. It felt like a constant battle between two versions of me. And one of them clearly being the stronger one. I'm so thankful everyday I managed to break free. Being a slave to addiction is such a wretched experience.

[@rpgcraftsman520]

Golem =/= Gollum. "Gollum" is pronounced "GAHL-uhm." "Golem" is said "GOH-lehm." The former is an ex-Hobbit twisted by the One Ring. The latter is a Jewish mythological construct of a man made of clay infused with life by mortal sorcerers...or made of flesh if you're one Dr. Frankenstein.

[@Lady_de_Lis]

@@rpgcraftsman520 Fixed it, thanks :)

[@MrSaphen]

Rational mind = Super Ego; Irrational mind = It. And you inbetween :)

[@NightspeakerR]

How did you come to break this constant battle between the mind, I am in a similar situation and would like to know your story as inspiration to hopefully one day I'll break this addiction of mine.

[@Lady_de_Lis]

@@NightspeakerR Brute force and strategy, mostly. I went cold turkey. In my imagination, I pictured that there were "bad" organisms that cause me to have cravings and other negative symptoms so that I would "feed" them and keep them alive. So anytime I was wallowing in misery, I imagined that it was because I was starving those organisms. And once they were all dead, I would finally be free. So I just needed to get through the pain until they were dead. I gave myself guilt free treats to enjoy anytime the cravings were happening (which was basically all the time). The treats didn't get rid of the cravings, just helped to distract me and to give me something I enjoyed as a kind of reward for staying strong. I actively avoided any areas / devices / situations / people that would increase temptation. I didn't let myself give in even one time. Cause then, the organisms would be fed, and I'd have to start over again trying to starve them. (That's how I'd failed in multiple past attempts) It took two months of absolute hell, but then it was over and I finally felt normal again. And I rarely get cravings now. But they say once an addict, always an addict. So I am terrified to try to ever indulge again, even just a little. I will probably never go back. My life is so much better now than it was. Even though I sometimes miss it, I know it wouldn't be worth it. But anyway, I hope that helps. Just don't beat yourself up too much if you fail. I failed loads of times before I managed to do it. Just keep trying again and modifying your strategy. Trial and error. You'll get in eventually if you don't give up. I wish you luck, and God Bless.

[@spaceanarchist1107]

It's interesting to hear Gollum being called a man. Although he was much older than the average hobbit, he still looked, acted, and talked like a child (which is probably why some people consider him cute.) Because of the Ring, he was forever frozen in time, a dark version of Peter Pan. That is what the Ring does: it grants immortality without growth or learning.

[@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286]

Is that why Sauron couldn't admit he was wrong?

[@ziephel-6780]

Sauron's worldview is the antithesis of change after all.

[@jayt9608]

​@@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286 No. The Ring has no power over its creator as it was but an extension and concentration of himself. He is one of the ancient immortal beings who were the aids to the Valar, the "gods" of Tolkien's world that answered to Eru Illuvitar. As such he was more powerful than any elf or man, and he was evil from the earliest days of creation. Thus the Ring could not corrupt its maker but would inevitably corrupt any other wielder.

[@Matt_History]

​@@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286Sauron believes he is right.

[@fantasywind3923]

Considerign he is of hobbit-kind, and also he is extremely old by this time, he may be a bit childish naturally....plus he is an insnane murderer and cannibal, deeply disturbed and mentally broken person. Hobbits even in old age are somewhat playful (I mean Bilbo comes to mind, over 100 and still has pranks and jokes in mind :) one look at the notices on the gifts he left behind for his relatives hahah). Hobbits as a whole seem to have this inner child in them regardless of age, in any case Hobbits naturally age somewhat slower, by the age of 33 they become 'adults' in their society, coming of age at 33 is unique hehe. And they live commonly up to 100 and more years, Gollum though or rather Smeagol of the river folk at Gladden Fields, was aged way beyond his time, his mind was crushed. There is this glorious moment in the book: "Gollum looked at them. A strange expression passed over his lean hungry face. The gleam faded from his eyes, and they went dim and grey, old and tired. A spasm of pain seemed to twist him, and he turned away, peering back up towards the pass, shaking his head, as if engaged in some interior debate. Then he came back, and slowly putting out a trembling hand, very cautiously he touched Frodo's knee--but almost the touch was a caress. For a fleeting moment, could one of the sleepers have seen him, they would have thought that they beheld an old weary hobbit, shrunken by the years that had carried him far beyond his time, beyond friends and kin, and the fields and streams of youth, an old starved pitiable thing.”

[@samwallaceart288]

"We like to think of ourselves as _alpha,_ or _sigma;_ but actually we're lucky if we're not Gollum." My favorite thing about Gollum is knowing who came up with him. Tolkien survived one of the worst wars to fight in losing his mates in the process; came home and mastered language studies so hard he wrote parts of the Dictionary, and finally turned his hobby of language invention into a fully functional narrative writing it in a straight line Page 1 to 800 in order without needing to think about plot beats. To my eyes, he must've been something of a unit. And still, some part of him _was_ Gollum.

[@philleW12]

I have never thought of Gollum in this light. It really goes to show why Tolkien wrote his work to be applicable, because it makes it so that the readers could divine multiple valid meanings and interpretations of the text.

[@Mrmigo8703]

I am not a religious man, but my own struggles with addiction have often left me believing that demons actually exist. The addiction is so insidious and so clever, and always nagging at the back of your mind. When the thoughts of relapse would occur it was like I was arguing with another person.

[@Crime_Mime]

Jonathan Pageau has some great videos on the topic of how we can interpret angels/demons. To summarize a little, phenomena like greed, anger, etc. exist within a person, but they also exist "trans-personally". These vices span multiple people, they're ancient, and they'll be around long after we're dead. At what point can they be considered "existing" in their own right? The theologian Paul Tillich called angels and demons the positive and negative sides of Being. They're simultaneously part of yourself, but also separate to yourself, and shared among everyone.

[@Tempusverum]

@@Crime_Mimethe weird thing is I can tangibly feel a presence when someone is murderously angry. It crackles through the atmosphere like an actual presence. Terrifying ordeal

[@lorenzobassi7410]

​@@Tempusverum call a catholic priest for exorcism

[@harbl99]

You ever read C.S.Lewis book _The Screwtape Letters_ ? You may find a lot of the senior tempter's advice to his nephew on how to lead his human project astray strangely familiar.

[@Larknok1]

The Gollum / Smeagol dichotomy isn't just symbolic of moral struggle (i.e. between good and evil) generally, but also particular to the grappling of addicts with their inner critic. The inner critic is the voice which grows in the mind of the addict which is constantly watching and berating the addict. It's the voice that tells the addict, like Gollum to Smeagol: "you don't have any friends, nobody likes you." The inner critic assaults the addict with the evidence of their moral failure: "you're a liar, and a thief. Murderer." The interesting thing about the inner critic is that it sounds like the voice of moral guidance, only it's dripping in malice. It's intention is to hurt and humiliate -- not to steer the addict (i.e. Smeagol) on the straight and narrow. The inner critic is trying to demolish the addict's sense of moral self-worth -- to the point that it is low enough that they will agree to debase themselves by relapsing. Often, addicts will try to shout down their inner critic, rebelling like a teenager almost like Smeagol does to Gollum. This only works temporarily, if at all. To disarm the critic and liberate ourselves from addiction, we have to take responsibility for our actions and feelings, accept our shame, and share our shame. We have to connect with others, and hope for salvation in something bigger than ourselves. We must learn to genuinely love and forgive ourselves, and to accept and celebrate imperfect progress. When we do get better, we must ultimately have mercy on others struggling with the same problems. It was Frodo's mercy which proved decisive in the destruction of the ring. We cannot help the Smeagols of the world by condemning them like Gollum does to Smeagol. We must aspire to be Frodo.

[@floatingeyes5106]

Thank you.

[@SeanWinters]

You state the difference between the critic and the conscience very well. I was prepared to disagree with you, but I can't. Good job bro.

[@StraightShot2977]

Damn. I think you really hit something here friend.

[@H3XED_OwO]

“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons - Jim Rohn

[@Kayjoir]

It's interesting how often Tolkien gave his villains and antagonists the opportunity to repent. Saruman was given several chances to repent, but refused each opportunity, only really regretting his decisions as he stared longingly toward the undying lands as he died. Sauron was even given the opportunity to repent, yet he chose to continue his master's Crusade, because repenting would imply that he was wrong and would have forced him to Humble himself.

[@jonathanstensberg]

It's almost like Tolkien wrote a "fundamentally religious and Catholic work"

[@ezraho8449]

Its funny because aside from how that plays into the Christian idea of repentence it also solves the wider narrative issue that films tend to have nowadays of "all the problems would have been solved if the characters had just sat down and talked about it." We are so obsessed with creating justified villains that often writers take it too far and create stories in which the entire conflict is based on some misunderstanding that could easily be cleared up through even the most basic of communication.

[@Kayjoir]

@@ezraho8449 Agreed. C.S. Lewis once talked about how people seem to want to be excused more than they want to be forgiven. Repentance is difficult and painful but it has an infinitely better outcome, in contrast, finding justifications and making excuses though far less painful usually leads to even greater Sorrows down the line.

[@ezraho8449]

@@Kayjoir another related topic to this is the “[X character] did nothing wrong” mentality that we are seeing nowadays. Eren Yeager of Attack on Titan being the most recent example of this. Where people try to justify evil actions by analyzing the motivations behind the character. I suppose it just shines a spotlight of how heavily modern society has adopted utilitarian ethics and how people have implicitly accepted that the ends will justify the means or in some of the most extreme cases that the means will justify the ends.

[@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286]

​@Ezra Ho Yeah, and killing innocent people will always be evil even if it is justified some how. Despite that, people still say things like that.

[@StormCrow702]

A lot of time I delude myself in thinking that when pushed comes to shove I can rise up and become a example to my siblings, being the oldest child of the brood. But in reality I’m more like Shinji Ikari and Gollum, with some bouts of strength sprinkled in between. I’m trying everyday to grow but it feels even my own heart is surrendering to dread. I’m sorry if im being to down in this Pilgrim, my birthday is coming up in May and one of the most important people in my life won’t be there to celebrate with my anymore. Thank you as always for the quality sir and God bless.

[@Mitramon]

You should be proud to be carrying your burdens. We can't control the gem that is given to us on birth. Not all is going to be as shiny, but our only job is to polish it as well as we can. Keep enduring!

[@thatoneguy8146]

Someone should actually make an edit of Frodo and Sam at mount Doom where Sam is trying to convince Frodo to throw the ring into the fire. But replace the ring with pornography, it would actually fit so well.

[@buckarooben7635]

@jose hernandez You can do it brother! I believe in you!

[@arturnicaciodeandrade9861]

What day of may ? I'm too born in the same month, and well, face similar problems. Kek

[@StormCrow702]

@@arturnicaciodeandrade9861 11

[@r_r_rye2441]

The shot of Gollum focusing solely on the ring even as his body sinks into lava always stuck with me.

[@thatoneguy8146]

Pilgrim Pass, I just wanted to comment, to express how much your videos mean to me. Your videos are so deep and analytical that I am shocked that you have only 50k subscribers. I also want to give thanks because your videos, mainly why is SCFI so religious, got me into faith and now I’m starting to practicing Christianity and it’s strange because I’ve never felt better. So thank you, and may God bless you. 35:39 This point here is actual so true, I found it so hard to get rid of my lustful ways before, but now since I’ve accepted Christ and have a higher purpose I went 5 weeks without temptation, I stumbled then pick myself up again.

[@thatoneguy8146]

@Dùnedain Thank you that means a lot.

[@johnnykilonzo2103]

Hey appreciate you coming to the Lord. Salvation is a journey and we welcome you. Hope you find a strong church rooted in the fellowship of our lord and savior Jesus. Colossians 3:1 states to seek what is above no matter what emotions do and He will keep your heart safe.

[@thatoneguy8146]

@@johnnykilonzo2103 Thankyou for the nice comments

[@ChristianCatboy]

I hope you're not getting into legalistic fundamentalism. I was a passionately committed Conservative Evangelical from the age of five, and remained so for thirty years... and still ended up "addicted" to visual and physical self-stimulation as soon as I hit puberty. Over the following years, as my inner conflict and desperation to "repent" continued to increase, I attempted to blackmail, humiliate, punish, and even torture myself (try rubbing poison oak into your d*** some time, for a good laugh), to force myself to stop sinning. If God hasn't given you the gift of being able to overcome sin in the way other members of your religious tradition expect you to, then... I'm sorry, but you simply won't be able to do it. Not even the most hellish "conversion therapy" will ever work. "God has handed everyone over to sin, so that he might have mercy on them all." I was only able to start escaping my own lust and incel-like state of resentful virginity, by finally questioning the legalistic dogmas that I'd been taught about sexuality and gender. So anyway... long story short, I'm taking estrogen and identify as a femboy now, but the inner conflict is finally subsiding, and I know that God loves me anyway. Hopefully you don't need to take such dramatic steps, but "if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away; it is better for you to enter life with one hand, then to have two hands and enter into Hell."

[@Kayjoir]

Once a friend suggested that the concept of balance was evil. Using drug users as an example. A drug user that believes in Balance won't try to quit the drug completely, he said, because having a little bit of a drug is balanced. I think he misunderstood the concept of balance. Balance is not indulging in things simply because they are there, rather balance is using things for their intended purpose. Applied directly to a bruise, tobacco can accelerate the healing.

[@rgama1173]

This is like people says that the force in Star wars needs the dark side

[@Kayjoir]

@@rgama1173 I think it would be cool if pilgrim did a video about the light side of the dark side of the force. To me there are some good aspects that are attributed to the dark side, but the dark side is an excessive Corruption of those attributes. When you compare Vader's emotionless mechanical method of dealing with situations he seems in a stark contrast of the other Dark Side users throughout the franchise. The dark side is not simply passionate or ambitious neither is it simply a desire for freedom. The Dark Side is a corruption.

[@TBlev215]

@@Kayjoire “light side” is surrendering one’s own will to the will of the Force, and the “dark side” is those who choose to use the power of the Force selfishly. Using the Force selfishly corrupts the person that uses it. That’s it.

[@Kayjoir]

@@TBlev215 Is that supposed to be the official explanation? If so, is the Pre or Post-Disney? For me, that's a little too general. I think the Enmity also plays a part.

[@theloweffortchannel7211]

​@@Kayjoir It's like comparing Zero-Sum and CHIM in Elder Scrolls. Both are the results of understanding the nature of reality. In the first, the ego is subsumed as it realizes it does not truly exist. The second recognizes as well, but the ego is rooted so strongly that instead of disappearing it becomes a virtual god due to also figuring out the source code of reality.

[@xenophon5354]

Warhammer 40k offers an absolute wealth of topics for you to get into. Just recently picked up the Horus Heresy and it’s pulpy but exceptional. Deeper than it seems on the surface, and perhaps unintentionally so given how prolifically the writers have borrowed from previous writers and tropes.

[@jhammers1918]

Honestly, the writing level and the overall assumptions about the genre fail to do the stories in Warhammer justice

[@xenophon5354]

@@jhammers1918 I suppose, but it doesn’t bother me that much. It’s nice to read pulp every now and again. Complex epics are wonderful, but almost no one can write very good ones. It’s nice to take a break and read Warhammer.

[@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286]

​@Xenophon Some day, I will write a good one. But not before I clean my room...

[@vngelicath1580]

Tolkien is a master at grasping the subtleties within the Christian understanding of "Sin" Sin is original, in that we are born with its influence and cannot ultimately overcome it (apart from grace), yet no one who succumbs to its power is innocent or guiltless. Moral culpability is always present, even when the odds are stacked against you. That's what makes triumphing over it (assisted by God, of course) so noteworthy.

[@victoralabbq]

The thumbnail is a work of art. Just as amazing as your content my catholic brother, amazing job, as always.

[@MrKage-fb2wy]

Sadly this topic is still in dire need. I’m glad you’re here to keep talking about it and look forward to hear about how you’re doing. You offer much needed wisdom. God bless Pilgrim. Looking forward to what you do next.

[@thatoneguy8146]

31:12 mate please make a Warhammer 40k video on the elder and there fall. Like its the perfect way to show what happens when a society gets to comfortable.

[@heavystalin2419]

You inspire your fellow men to study such smut? YOU HERETIC!

[@thewayfarer8849]

I find your videos on masculinity to be some of the best, don't oversaturate sure, but I still enjoy the Aragorn video and find the other two very insightful

[@carrotifson1331]

your videos are such a gift

[@PilgrimsPass]

thank you, I feel the same about comments like yours :)

[@menschgebliebenergossenpar9213]

*grift

[@Shiorevi]

The failed Femininity of Guyladriel. (That show has given so many horrors of the cosmos)

[@GigaMan2077]

Girlbossadriel

[@clongshanks5206]

I was so disappointed when my favorite lotr KZbinrs were giving so much coverage of the rings of power

[@utubefuku7132]

We do not talk about... Whatever that is.

[@joedan5366]

Yes

[@jamalisujang2712]

It's not canon anyway, better to be abandoned and forgotten. 😂😂😂

[@RHR1991]

This video has no right to be so good. Keep the great work my man, this si becoming one of my favorite youtube channels. Cheers from Spain.

[@needingmorepatience]

7secs in: I'm going to stop you right there, I couldn't be more thrilled to hear about masculinity. I just watched Return of the King in theaters and I couldn't believe how far we've come from truly heroic, courageous, kind yet strong and dangerous men. I grew up with figures like this and having to resort to old 80's cartoons for my children has truly showed how little there is in the way of masculinity represented today. Equally important is the discussion of masculinity's failures. With incredible character studies that Tolkien provided us; this allows us, in a safe environment of media, to recognize the broken and weak character faults in these fallen characters within ourselves. It's hard to see the truth, even in myself, but once we see it, pray for God's strength in Lord Jesus Christ's name, amen, and take the opportunities to overcome. It's not the absence of fear that defines courage, it's in the midst of fear and overcoming it that is where true courage lies. Never give up, even after giving up, keep trying. Please, continue to talk about masculinity as much as you want. Glad to see you back, missed you videos, and hope you're doing well. God bless in Lord Jesus Christ's name, amen!

[@Kayjoir]

This video kind of reminds me of something another KZbinr said about how villains are often Heroes that failed in their hero's journey.

[@nickperri6571]

Happy to see you’re back safe and sound. I’ll be looking forward to your stories of your travels!

[@potatolord2196]

It is interesting that Tolken gets a lot darker at times then most realize, I think the only other place I've seen this archetype work well is in ReZero, which is basically what if Smeagel was transported to another world and got his shit together

[@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286]

Re:Zero sucks.

[@sexkarabin3967]

@@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286 your life sucks

[@mengoinggodsway9024]

It gets real dark in books like The Children of Hurin.

[@VelociousYT]

A friend of mine recommended this, it's nice to see someone who actually has some braincells and understands the complexities and dilemmas people face, nothing is that simple, yet the solution is always there, it's up to us if we want to take it or not. Great channel, keep up the good work

[@thehussarsjacobitess85]

Quick comment about self-victimization: know thyself. Yes, for many, it's the syrupy sweet elixir that dulls our efforts. But for some of us, accepting our victimization keeps us from giving up. You have to know whether you're too hard or soft on yourself by nature. I'm naturally scrupulous and was raised to worship Calvinist notions of success. Thus, when I'm working, and self-doubt comes to sneer at me, it helps to say, "Those past failures made sense in context. That context has changed."

[@deckieonlamons8834]

Yo, Pilgrim. I've been watching your vids for months. I always appreciate your ability to be real and religious. You expertly elucidated something I've thought about faith and true masculine strength for a long time. Appreciate your hard work, bro. Keep ya head up, stay blessed and keep the faith 🙏 Respect from Ft Lauderdale, Fl.

[@kalev_knight]

Pilgrim "I'll make shorter video" also pilgrim*makes 30 min video*

[@philleW12]

Pilgrim: This IS the shorter video.

[@marcoasturias8520]

Shorter isn't literally short

[@rgama1173]

Shorter thant the last... 4?

[@riftvallance2087]

I like the longer ones anyway

[@kalev_knight]

@@riftvallance2087 yes

[@ArchetypeGotoh]

Very well said. I hadn't considered before using Denethor and Wormtongue as other examples of failed men, though my buddies and I just watched all 3 extended editions last week. Masculinity, addiction, LOTR, all woven together beautifully

[@theodoremccarthy4438]

The term for someone who “fails” despite trying their best is not “victim”. It’s “alive”. As Jean Luc once told Data, “It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That’s not a weakness. That’s life.”

[@Chaliebravo-6789]

Always a good day when the pilgrim uploads God bless ☦️✝️

[@blue_shiner]

Pilgrim's Pass, you are a man of wisdom. The words you share are brutal but true, much like life. Gollum has taken to a life of lies, both to himself and others. The warrior Miyamoto Musashi wrote on this, speaking of the danger of lying at any degree. This is something I struggle with endlessly, being dishonest to myself about the condition of my character, my life, and my relationships with others. I'd like to offer an anecdote that allows me to so closely relate to this video. Last summer, I was faced with a truth so bright and horrible that I ran to the shadows, thinking I could fix my life in the isolation of my room with nothing but a computer and a couple of books. I'm here to report that it has been an utter and colossal failure. What little I've learned I can barely apply, since I never left my comfort zones. My social sanity has begun to collapse, I have lost the respect of many of my peers, and my family all considers me helpless. I sought to grow in comfort, it was foolish, self serving, and cowardly from the start. I was like Gollum. I took the ring and ran into my cave, growing only more disgusting by the day. I am afraid, yet again, because this video has motivated me. It's motivated me to move out of my hole, to redeem what I can with my loved ones, and reclaim my sanity. I don't want to fail, growth is hard but I need to do it - somehow. I've been reading the Middle-Earth series for the first time recently, much owed to the content of this channel. This video has shaken my whole vision of it. I am tired of being pitiful. I can't honestly say I want challenge, but I now know I need it. Please, to any reading this, give me some advice - some action I could take to bring myself out of this despair.

[@elysebasile4011]

While it's difficult for me and other online people to understand your problems and your circumstances and therefore give solutions, the advice I can give is that good people you know in real life will be able to give you the best solutions for your problems, so your priority should be to repair and strengthen the relationships with them. Start repairing the relationships with people you want to be close to. If your not familiar with the Five Love Languages, they are: words of affirmation (sincere compliments), quality time, giving/receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch (non-sexual, like hugging). Odds are the good people you know will love at least one of those forms of affection and will be grateful to receive it. Be gratuitous and don't expect anything in return. The way to stop being pitiful is to stop grasping at things and start caring about others. And don't get discouraged if you failure or get in a fight, just keep trying. Pride is not the opposite of shame but its source. Don't think less of yourself in the put-down way, but think less often of yourself because you fill your thoughts with other people.

[@reviewspiteras]

I wish you blessings in your difficult journey brother.

[@allanwalli2935]

Your articulate, discerning comment shows you have self awareness, and at least a measure of compassion for your burdened down self. Healing is a tricky business, not something to be forced, and impossible to do alone, as you discovered. May I suggest a book by Terry Real called I Don’t Want to Talk About It? It helped me face my pain and depression which went back to my early teens. Also, spending time doing something that brings real joy, possibly music or art, and getting outside into nature can do amazing things. Exercise of any kind is great too. DONT be hard on yourself in a judgemental way. One step at a time. All,the best💗💗

[@icarovdl]

I am so happy you're back to doing long videos!! Good job man

[@noblecobra5943]

Re: the 'Alternative ending for Gollum' issue, I think the letter they're referring to is # 246 from 'The Letters of JRR Tolkien" (depending on the edition it might be numbered differently. And no, I don't know that off hand; I just happened to have recently read it and was able to look it up), where he does talk about a few alternate scenarios, both for Gollum and for the quest in general, had things gone differently. In summary, Prof. Tolkien says that, had Gollum made good on his moment of grace, he would have experienced a struggle between his love for Frodo and his desire for the Ring and would have almost certainly still tried to take it from him at the end, the main difference being that he may have then *voluntarily* cast himself into the fire, seeing it as the only way to help Frodo. There's no scenario in which Gollum is 'cured' or fully redeemed. As for Sam's role, it's true his unthinking rebuff destroys Gollum's moment of redemption and it's a master-stroke of tragedy, but Tolkien was more inclined to blame Gollum for that as being too ready to turn away from grace, while Sam, he says, could hardly have acted differently given his character. It's definitely saying too much to put the bulk of the blame on Sam, as so much of it is Gollum/Smeagle's fundamental weakness and viciousness. Love your videos! Some of the most refreshingly intelligent commentary I've found in a while.

[@JJsings]

I find all your videos incredibly inspiring. Your video on Galadriel has really helped me find a positive female role model for myself. Here's to all of us who continue to look up!

[@matthewcarbunculus]

As someone who struggles with despair due to my failings, this hits hard. In a lot of ways, it is easy to see how i have been victimized, at least now. I was abused and raised from an incredibly young age with porn/lust and gluttony and sloth and wrath and pride as the standards for behavior i was supposed to accept. But having walked away from that upbringing years ago, and still seeing how the seemingly endless weights I carry as a result (of PTSD-induced panic, despair, gullibility, and incapable bumbling) hurt the innocent who rely on me... it is hard not to feel a failure. I know intellectually you are right--failing does not make a failure/loser, but seeing the impact it has on others makes it hard to believe.

[@sillysad3198]

let me tell you the most revealing story of masculinity in human history. Simo Haya the absolute superhuman hero, the man who far surpassed heroic comic books, who in reality saved his country by exterminating hordes of blodlusty enemies, the man who made himself in every regard, no only in his military achivelement, he was a successful farmer and homesteader. And he was not obscure, he was praised during his lifetime by all his male compatriots. He died childless. Women rejected him. Women rejected everything they tell you they praise. He was not a criminal, he was not a bad boy.

[@cosmicnomad8575]

Amen! What a beautiful video. I’ve struggled with addictive and obsessive behaviors before as I’m sure many here have. I’m on the road of improvement but there is still much to go and the path is long and winding. Thanks for the video and God Bless!

[@scollin8096]

Ya know, I’ve been reading through Brandon Sanderson’s “Stormlight Archive” books, and it’s kinda uncanny how many things I notice and take away from that series you touch on here. I definitely recommend the series, I’d love your take on it. SPOILERS AHEAD IF YOU HAVE NOT READ IT: I mean, the three gods of the world aren’t really meant to be being, but aspects of life essentially, literally being named said concepts: Cultivation, the feminine god of “nature” and “change”, Honor, who so far as I have gotten through “Oathbringer” is a god of Oaths and Ideals, the Knights Radiant (people that can manipulate magic and the forces of the universe) physically embody these. Then there is the dark lord, Odium (which means “generally hated” according to google) who is the self proclaimed god of Passion and emotion. I’m the third entry of the series, Odium corrupts several people by essentially making them give in and “blame him” for their sins, and attempts to do the same to one of the main characters. The character, however, is able to resist because he understands that while, yes, the machinations of Odium did have a hand in his behavior in the past, he ultimately takes responsibility of those actions for himself. *That*… that higher standard to know that there is only one person to blame for the bad things you do in life, has really touched me more than I thought it could, and was definitely more than I expected from modern fantasy writing. Thank you, Pilgrim, for really diving into the topics that you cover. And don’t sell yourself short, because if the content you put a lot of time and effort into is not only positively received, but also positively impacts people’s lives, is it really all that cringe?

[@doger944]

>The masculine urge to abstane from pornography before your mind descends any further into degenerecy

[@EzraHatsuko]

POV:You succeeded -...I am Free,the snakes poison no longer affects me,for I have trampled upon its skull...

[@DreamWolfPics]

This is so helpful! It is a fascinating analysis not only on Gollum, but also on the consequences of choosing to be moral/virtuous or not. How to keep choosing good vs. your own selfish rushes/addictions.

[@aminermanmc2532]

Watching this while having a KZbin addiction is painful.

[@danielcuevas5899]

Pilgrim has returned from his journey, and as brought us a gift.

[@lefdee]

A fun thing to note is that Gollum did eventually have a support system when it came to Frodo. Maybe too little too late but still someone working to help him even though that kindness would just be abused. It really is the classic warning of how you can’t help some people and they will only drag you down with them

[@QuebecSouverain]

Was just binging your older videos because I was eagerly awaiting new content from you!

[@hmmokay.4807]

Glad I found your channel. Excellent discussion thank you.

[@Challenger_Axis]

That thumbnail is top tier haha

[@DOUBLEA1]

Well done sir on such a well written video

[@DakkaDakkaDakkaWaagh]

Dude your videos always make me reflect on my life and the way I should or shouldn't be living. Far and away my favourite channel. Keep up the good work

[@PcCAvioN]

Thought provoking, inspiring, humbling, and pretty funny. Thank you

[@nathanielmartins5930]

A redemption for Gollum in my opinion would involve him getting into a brawl with Frodo over the ring after having rejected the ring entirely, he must get into that brawl after accepting that he has become a horrid being and it is is attachment to the ring is what made him what he is, he should also see Frodo as his exact opposite and what he wants to be, finally, he should recognise that the ring is curropting Frodo from the image he idealised to something closer to the horrid thing he became, and intervening to save Frodo from meeting a fate like his own should be the reason he gets into the brawl in the first place. And then, having taken the ring out of Frodo's grisp, not with a smile but with horror at how Frodo wouldn't destroy the ring, and as he is stumbling back and falling off the cliff, his concern wouldn't be keeping the ring out of the Lava, but to plunge it as deep as his arm can go to destroy it, accepting his fate. But of course, the movies are already great as they are and I wouldn't change a thing.

[@cyniclybreathing2336]

I absolutely love your videos on masculinity, as a woman though I wish there were more videos about femininity and female characters too! I'm in the process of rethinking my roles as a woman, wife and expecting mother, and your videos definitely help me to clearly see my roles as a woman. Not complaining on the masculine videos though! Still rewatch those like crazy!

[@allanwalli2935]

Just found you, a few minutes in, and thinking this is so my kind of channel! Cant wait to get into it more….

[@barbarabaker1457]

Laughed at the title, cried at the video. Excellent job.

[@redpilledrhodesian1407]

All your videos are great but I especially love your Tolkien content! Thanks!

[@kostadindurchov5507]

Bro your memery is super good. You should make a discord for your growing community.

[@Extellus]

Really good video, the Gollum - Sigma comparison made me laugh because of how true it is

[@ramblingwhitedog7346]

This is an amazing video and I agree with a lot of the points. My only complain is that I believe Gollum's and Bellatrix's respective failures aren't necessarily related to their sexes. It's more due to their character. You could easily gender-swap them both and keep all their actions the same, and their characters would work just as well. Men can be fanatically obsessed with a single person, and women can be obsessed with an abstraction or object. Failure has many different manifestations, and anyone from any walk of life can suffer them, regardless of their sex.

[@ChristianCatboy]

Gender is a social construct anyway 😸

[@loganevans3205]

Frickin brilliant once again brother. Love the videos, thanks for the inspiration. I always thought of Gollum in this way, but the way that you put it in words is wonderful!

[@lucasBarjas]

5:35 in portuguese "addiction" and "vice" is the same word

[@elbarroetoide6898]

Maybe is lack of self worth, but I do think of myself as a Failure, despite taking great care of those i love, Helping them and helping others when I can, but I´m an anxiety mess, at the verge of being a College Drop out, failing in many things like doing more exercise, being being diagnosed with depression two times already, aimless, without a job, without having a girlfriend at my 21 years, with those I truly consider friends being counted with the fingers of one hand.... these videos help me to get some introspection about myself, get inspired, and get some course in my life. keep doing things like this, keep doing a great job.

[@BillyBasd]

Don't quit, see college through to the end. Bet grateful for the friends you have. Many have no true friends. As for women, they will come once you have your mission chosen and start towards it. Women love a man with a good plan. You are worthy!

[@thatoneguy8146]

Damn you wrote my situation word for word I’m even 21 ha. I hope your journey this pass year things have improved for you my friend

[@kaijuartist7367]

This man clearly deserves more subscribers

[@gordonfreeman-g5w]

Your videos are so deep, precise and have a touch of humor and casualness that makes it so easy to watch and comprehend what you're talking about. This one especially hit me really deep as someone who struggles with addiction and reinforces why I need to make the changes in my life, lest I find myself falling and disintegrating in a river of magma like Gollum. Thank you deeply for these videos and deepening my understanding of the archetypes that exist within the LOTR universe. Your vids are very important to me.

[@RostroAeternum]

19:10-19:20 I'm impressed, Pilgrim's Pass. I don't know how religious you are (if at all), but to be able to admit your weakness that many of us have in common (if not all) shows great humility and awareness on your part (or for whoever writes this [I'd like to believe and assume it's you]). I come from a Christian (Catholic) background, and what you just explained is the road for everyone striving for holiness and Godly values. You might wonder why I limited this struggle to a Christian perspective instead of "this is how everyone experiences it, not just Christians." And to an extent this is true, but if one doesn't believe in God and labor towards an infinite good, then in vain does the laborer toil. Great quality like this video is why I subscribe for more. God bless you, sir.

[@TBlev215]

I never thought of the Ring uncovering people’s true morality like that! Nice one!

[@arnowisp6244]

Reminds me of what Benjamin Franklin said. If you want someone to reveal themselves. Give them a bit of power or something to that effect.

[@ericalmodovar1938]

I'll be sharing your video, good sir, if you don't mind...

[@shougatea]

your videos help me think deeper about my life

[@InChristWeTrust999]

I love how you brought it all back to God at the end brother. Great video. God bless! ❤

[@mikiasg8453]

I love your videos regarding this topic, the Frodo, Aragorn and Gandalf videos are great. Keep going. Frodo one is particularly most memorable. Subscribed

[@ayo9290]

I'm halfway through the video and now I'm leaving the video to stop procrastinating on work. Well done, I'll watch the rest later.

[@peeta7420]

Another great video! Also, I'm glad that you made the distinction of "fetishes that develop over time" from innate ones

[@scroletyper8286]

This is a great anti addiction and specifically anti porn video. Useful for man. Thank you

[@smashley4661]

Considering that this video talks about addiction, I would like to remind everyone that sex is like a drug. One can be addicted to it and do horrible things to others.

[@paradoxelle481]

Your take on Aragorn's masculinity felt fresh in a sea of frozen cold takes, that's why I think it blew up.

[@pzee1802]

Hey Pilgrim, Just want to let you know how important this video you made was to me right now. Trying to work on my own struggle with addiction, and your insight into this character to draw out the reality inherent within it was beautifully done. I greatly appreciate the work you do and the views you stand for. Keep up the good fight! Excited to see more of what you do in the future.

[@ViewTube_Emperor_of_Mankind]

I judge this video: Important.

[@ThePariahDark]

You said some very intriguing and thought provoking things in this video. Thank you.

[@dxmxrxsbxxckthxwxxdxlf3931]

I have heard a few times that we all need self-love, however, Mat Walsh has said in a video that to improve yourself, you need to put others ahead of yourself rather than treating yourself as much as possible to combat selfishness and laziness.

[@Hypnotically_Caucasian]

That thumbnail is gold!

[@wereitsoeasy189]

You make some of the best LOTR videos.. hold up. You make some of the best videos overall

[@wesley.3250]

Ah yes, Billytrix. Awesome character.

[@reviewspiteras]

29:07 even if that guy that said "we are mr. Beast, we are legion" its joking, it doesn't stops it to be creepy

[@StoneCBears]

Great video Pilgrim. Hopefully, the next Lord of the Rings video will be about friendship. Examples from the books such as Gimli & Legolas to Fredo & Sam. Definitely would love to hear your experiences in Ukraine.

[@PilgrimsPass]

that's not a bad idea :)

[@zenhaelcero8481]

19:00 I'm definitely terrified of children. I don't remember when I stopped fantasizing about heroism, but it happened at some point or other without my realizing it. I have to struggle to have any concept of myself as a heroic figure. In my headspace it just isn't something that has anything to do with me, so I never think about it. When I was a kid I used to play games and fantasize about being some heroic figure, but that was a long time ago. Thanks for the video.

[@johnnykilonzo2103]

I too struggled with fantasizing about me being a hero. Coming from Kenya I have seen the struggle my parents went through to get me to school and how our film industry is ruled by elites that I wanted to save all from the evil one. But I came to see through becoming born again that I too was part of the system, that I was fallen and self pity ruled my heart. By Christ I now see how manipulative, I was and now I appreciate that at least I have something to eat and friends and parents who used little to bless me.

[@chaosgyro]

We aren't all going to have the makings of a "hero" and wind up as Frodo or Aragorn. There are still other important roles to play. Some of us get to be Sam supporting those around us so they can be the best they can be. Others get to be Gandalf dispensing the wisdom gathered from their own journeys. Though I think a lot of us would happily settle for being Boromir: deeply flawed, but loved by our friends, and missed when we're gone.

[@koboldlord]

Incredible video. Subscribed.

[@ViriatoII]

Rejoice, Pilgrim has another video about the Lord of the Rings!

[@jacktaipen2077]

Thats the sad reality. I always like to imagine ourselves as these great roles in lotr fantasy but in reality I relate to Smeagle / Gollum the most. But I'll never stop trying to be better.

[@jonathangavin7560]

I think Saruman might also be considered a failure of masculinity. However his character might be a better cautionary tale of putting too much reliance on techne and a lack of hope. What are your thoughts?

[@PilgrimsPass]

I agree, well said.

[@TheEverSoTalented]

I love the take on addiction....it seems the people that approach this subject are either ex-adducts or some form of an addiction specialist- which is why that thing that can attach itself to the "best" people and until one is or knows of someone who is an addict .... its an extremely difficult situation to beat. We'll thought out video and from a viewpoint I've not seen before! 👍

[@Nunnyahbizhen]

This is amazing! I loved the analysis of the character and the points you gave on male and female behavior patterns when it comes to going rogue, so to speak. I hope to develop some works of fiction and this analysis is great information for the portrayal of certain characters and how their actions might manifest. As you have stated we all have our struggles and it is indeed a fight but once you learn to conquer the parts of you that are trying to hold you down you are free and truly in charge to begin making a change. I hope that many young and older men find this and listen to it. We all need encouragement and support, especially the young men that society is trying to destroy so they can then step into their role and have control of the masses for their own personal gain. Media and world society has always tried to tell both men and women what it is to be respected as a true man or woman but only God has the best answer.👍🏿

[@jacopoarmini7889]

my only real issue with the whole Nofap thing is that what constitutes porn addiction is not very clear. I understand that craving porn 24/7 is very clearly bad and should be treated, but I also believe that masturbation and sexual desire per se aren't something that should be repressed all the time, which some seem to suggest we should do.

[@algorithmgeneratedanimegir1286]

Men are built to c00m. If you don't jerk off, you will spill in your sleep which is nasty.

[@konradcasler9197]

Your distinction between failure and victimhood was very interesting. I’ll have to take time to consider it.

[@MaitlandJones]

A lot of your points about reveling in self-destruction hit home as a former porn addict. I won't go into too much detail there. A book that helped me is easypeasy method, for those of you who struggle quitting on pure willpower.

[@jg6972]

It is really a mark of a great story or a great art overall, that it speaks the truth on so many levels. You can analyse LoTR as a simple heroes journey, a religious analogy, a jungian metaphor of self and the shadow. There's this, a story about addiction and so on. It feels almost silly to take all those perspectives as separate, because, as in a true myth, they contain all of it at once. It will never seize to amaze what Tolkien created and how poor the modern intellectual attempts adopt and change it fail. That's logos man. Almost like "not a single jot, not a stroke of a pen will disappear", because it's the truth

[@NoOne-ix7dg]

More horiffict outcome of addiction in both cases such as males and female, on my mind is represented in requiem for a dream. I hope one day you'll maybe touch to it too. This film really fright me, much more than, probably, all those horror films which I've seen

[@justachannel8600]

To add to that the movie not only dealt with drugs but also 'minor' addictions such as living through TV.

[@pepealasquid6005]

Genesis 2:18 is a perfect verse for this video: Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Even in the very start we were not meant to be alone

[@billyherrington5112]

Matthew 19 and also 1st Corinthians 7

[@mattromero9797]

Im not even half way through with this video and I’m so thankful you’ve made a video about the greatest fantasy story of all time, and relating it back modern men and their issues. Especially the BIG issue witch is pornography. This video needed to made. Appreciate your channel!

[@bugra6340]

That is the best sponsored content I have ever seen.