INFJs cannot be “deep” without Fe

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[@AlisolteAllGrownUp]

I mean, there is definitely a segment of the INFJ population that purposely disengages their Fe... however in my own experience it is very much due to the feeling of manipulation that comes with it. When you see the social people around you, that behave in very specific ways within the group, but when you are one on one they open up and share their true experiences, you can't help but wonder about why we are wearing these masks and engaging in this play. I believe there is a Kafka quote, let me find it... "I was ashamed of myself when i realized life was a costume party; and I attended with my real face." Then the idea of adopting the costume to take part in the party seems a bit... counterproductive. I think a lot of the problem is we sit around wondering when the world is going to change rather than pretending to be one of them to change it.

[@Elodie_N_INTJ_Analyzes]

I always appreciate your deep sunday insights. It's fun how INFJ INTJ think they are not smart, and have tendency to devalue, doubt about themselves, whereas they are among the most intelligent types. INFJ INTJ are the deepest for sure. No one can know we are deep or intelligent if we don't show it, if we don't interact with the world. We need to speak and share our Ni informations, thing which is not always easy to do for Ni dom.

[@juice_lime5114]

About you Se description, that's something that many always miss. I literally have a similar explanation regarding the "room" situation. It's like when things become static and predictable for too long by enclosing from the external world, you can "freak out" internally because you have run out of things to contemplate upon. It's something like "I must always find something new or unpredictable to keep my brain going". Where that's a good place? Get out of the room and head into an open environment. Preferrably somewhere that isn't too crowded, but still with signs of people. Can say that's also related to Fe usage, but I see this as my extraverted side in a relaxed state.

[@tajbell4086]

I just wanted to say that I've only watched two of your videos and I just love them! Thanks a million I subscribed after the first video! I very much look forward to purchasing and reading your books.

[@johnk3714]

Some thoughts in response to your excellent videos Ren. In a generalised sort of way, Ni and Ti are about what I am, and Fe is about what I need. Fe and Se are the nets that catch the food and Ni and Ti are what process and digest it. At least that's how it feels to me. Because I am introverted, and because the world is wide and full of contingencies Fe needs some serious conscious effort from me, unlike Ni and Ti which just happen without my needing to be deliberate about it. It also feels risky because of those contingencies - it is a social function and so the risks are social ones. It seems to me that if we are disabled by fear and don't take these risks then the scope of our lives are truncated and we cannot grow. When I say Fe is about what I need, this isn't all about taking - I need to give as well, and in that giving is some of the most fulfilling aspects of INFJ life. Fe is at the heart of that giving. If we let it, Ni, Fe and Se working together can fill the whole world with magic - it can be transformed into something living for us rather than the dead matter of pure materialism. Life is as much part of the fabric of the world as are atoms and forces - and through us the universe experiences itself as a living thing.

[@StephanieJeanne]

Intellectually, I absolutely agree with what you've said here. Just like a baby has to have stimulation in order to develop into a thinking, learning, emotionally intelligent human, we as adults (who are following this personality "system," if you will) have to do things to develop our set of functions, especially the weaker and/or less-lreferred ones. In my life, the hardest part is trying to think of a "safe" place to meet others irl. I'm not completely sealed off in a room, but I don't see family that often in person, and friends have been hard to come by. Maybe your next one will give suggestions for making friends(?). 😜 Haha. Thanks, Ren. Happy Sunday.

[@RW-gw7zi]

Try the Meetup app

[@heatherwhatever7714]

Good morning. What about blissful alienation? Just kidding slightly. ☺️🤟🏼I think your kitty is climbing shoe boxes. Thank you for inspiration and challenges.

[@Chacha_Zwing]

Hello very interesting I was just wandering about Fe I sometimes feel like I’m judging myself but more as if my introvert side was judging my social side . Since a know about mbti i interpret this as ti making Fe feel "stupid ". Do you think it might be the ni ti working together "against" the fe ? I agree with you when you say the introvert self wants to feel confortable by devaluing the extroverted functions. Also do you know if ni and fe can create a negative self-image?

[@Coneman3]

Ni and Ti are our refuge. Fe is often disappointing so we flit between the 2. Of course Fe is our only direct connection with the real world, so we crave and need it. But ni and ti make our Fe needs complex and deep in a world that mostly isn’t, at least in terms of relationships.

[@heatherwhatever7714]

I already have a Patreon account but it’s bumping me to signing up which then says I already have etc. I think I’m in an ADHD loop. I will return after coffee. I think I just disqualified myself from further discussions. 😬