Why it’s crucial for INFJs to value Fe

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[@juice_lime5114]

You are right with the Fe-Ti usage. For INFJs, it is to communicate effectively with a sound logical sense. But to consider why some INFJs sort of "undervalue" Fe, this would require a peek into the "story" that caused them to do so. There's the reason why those that are using more Fe are considered the healthier ones that are more open, and those using more Ti are more reclusive, defensive, and skeptical. The latter is also prone to lower energy and stability, due to the struggles of using lower functions. Not that it's undervaluing Fe, it's more like not really getting the chance to express it. How this theory was picked apart, was through analysis of my early life plagued with mental instability and the experiences of others. A strict environment where Ni-Fe is suppressed, forces the expression Ti-Se as a coping mechanism. It will become even more pronounced after countless disappointments where Fe failed. For me, it only gave more "sanity" this year after accepting the reality of being a feeler. For INFJs to "re-value" Fe, it would often require them to unravel what caused them such self-restrictions to begin with. This is often stemming from past failures and trauma, which is the greatest enemy of INFJs. Nearly always, they wouldn't even notice that such self-restraints were there holding them back from the unconscious. They are shutting themselves out from their natural preferences. That is the tragedy that locks an individual from their full potential, regardless of personality type.

[@RensRoom]

I think everything you said is exactly right. There may indeed be deeper causes than the ones I mentioned in the video, and trauma is certainly one of them. But I guess addressing such root causes is something that goes way beyond Jungian typology. I could well imagine that some of the discussions one may have with a therapist may have parts that could be translated into "revaluation of Fe use" among other things. "How to cope with the possibility of being in the grip of Se" is another one.

[@johnking2740]

You are right Ren, there are people out there who manipulate others via emotions, but the INFJ (my personal experience) can use that ability to shield themselves from manipulation, add that in conjunction with our Lie Detector ability and we can start to become impervious to either being swamped with other people's emotions or emotional manipulation. We can also use that shielding to sift through the emotions we pick up on surrounding us, so we can filter out the unwanted feelings and be able to focus on the ones that truly matter, and we can also retrace that emotions origin to find the proper owner. Scam artists, Cult leaders, false prophets and politicians use that emotional manipulation and play on people's fears, whether it be about sex, race, finances or religion, they will prey on people's fears. Even before finding out about the MBTI, I had to shield myself from other people's emotions, and I also learned how to discern truth from lies, it takes time but with practice and patience anyone can do it.

[@markdhananjaya5663]

Very insightful video Ren☺️. I also think Fe is a tool, like a scanner used to identify emotions, identify information on how emotions influence a person's actions or decision making. Now that we have attained information using Fe, it is up to us to decide what we are going to do using this information. I think when people say Fe is fake or Fe is manipulative, they are referring to the ulterior motives of the individual. Anyone can be manipulative when they do not communicate their true intentions/motives. It doesn't matter what MBTI they are, anyone can have ulterior motives. Lack of honesty is fake. Fe is only a tool which identifies emotions. We can do good with Fe by helping others or using Fe to communicate our ideas better ☺️. However, it is important that we communicate our genuine motives with others and be honest.

[@anneleblanc910]

omggg your most popular video has popped up in my recommended, i’m so glad i found you! i bought your book months ago and i’m currently rereading it, it’s my favourite one about infjs🥰 glad to see more of your insights on this type!

[@naturalborn148]

Hi. I have listened to this video before but this time it really struck me that I am much more of an extroverted INFJ and much more of a sophisticated Fe user than I thought. I am an anthropologist and professor and I have received awards for excellence in classroom teaching. I always viewed the classroom as a stage and a place to explain my various ideas and philosophies related to the subject matter. I am really good at explaining and elaborating complex concepts and grounding them in real world examples based on my Se/Fe experiences. Being a good teacher doesn’t always make one a good an academic and I find myself longing for more creativity and emotional expression than I am able to access in the university/academic/intellectual sphere. My goal in my later years (mid-40’s currently) is to use my Fe for more creative expression of my own internal world through blogging, a book project and writing songs, playing my guitar and singing. I wrote a lot of poetry in my 20’s and have consistently journaled for the past 20 years. Saying this all to say that your observations both in your videos and The Ecstatic Soul are prescient and have been very valuable to me in my own self-development and appreciation of my gifts so thank you!

[@StephanieJeanne]

I don’t know about others, but for me, if I do devalue Fe, it’s usually that I want to be able to express an idea, or act in a way that is authentic to me, but that a group may not understand, or may even criticize; a fear of others' judgment, if you will. Sometimes I don’t want to care (though I inevitably do). I really don't think about the manipulative aspect of it, even if I'm unconsciously doing just that. 🙃 🤷‍♀️

[@RensRoom]

The irony is that I think *even* when we're expressing an idea that may go against the grain, we still use Fe to manage its delivery. I think that from the moment we start thinking about impact / how an idea will be received, we are already using Fe.

[@StephanieJeanne]

@@RensRoom Ah, yes, you're right.

[@onibovari4403]

I have found using fe difficult for two reasons I think, one it’s more difficult than people might think to filter fe through Ni. Ni doesn’t make it easy. And two yes because of the preference for using the introverted functions/as a fall back I think that we get to thinking that fe by itself is less valuable and/or unable to offer us a means of communicating directly with others. So a kind of trepidation or insecurity is developed within fe. We doubt even our own motivations

[@TeraHammer]

The many instances you mention your books and now your patreon with exclusive content... it starts to tire and distract with content I have no interest in. It makes me less inclined to click on your videos, wondering how far I should skip ahead to come to the core story and points. On topic: the discovery I should have good Fe in my personality was a nice self-confidence booster, to find a hidden power I was not as aware of. *but it was in you all along*-meme ^^ I picked up mentoring to peek into it further, really enjoying that and finding gratitude and additional purpose. I agree, it's crucial to value Fe. And as any tool, it can be used for evil and for good.

[@RensRoom]

Ha, thanks man for the honest feedback. It's important to me that you have a good time watching my content -- especially keeping in mind that you are one of the more actively engaged viewers here, and have been for a long time. I'm still calibrating how to promote my work / patreon, but I proooomise you that it'll all be soon covered in just 5-10 seconds. It will continue to be, though, because I have no other medium to talk about my work... but it'll be a hell of a lot tighter from now on. Hold me to my word if I don't deliver, lol. As for your comment on Fe: yeah, it can have a bit of a "hidden power" feel sometimes. I think this is actually a really good way to figure out if someone is an xxFJ or not. From tertiary and below, I don't think Fe comes in exactly that guise. But I'll develop my thoughts further in video when I know how to do so.

[@notthatvashti8127]

My Fe is a problem child. Both my Ti and Ni would like for it to take a seat. This is not a braggadocious statement. It doesn't come about to be nefarious, it's usually the opposite. So mine is not undervalued, it's overworked. I have read your first book and I've highlighted points that challenge my ideas, but I need to re-read it to get a deeper understanding of your theories. I have decided to read the second one before doing this. What I have read has been interesting thus far.

[@yellow_jacket3260]

Thanks for this video, lately I have been dwelling too much in Ti and Se so knowing the importance of other functions helps

[@RensRoom]

What kind of activities lead you to prioritising Ti and Se? Just curious : )

[@yellow_jacket3260]

@@RensRoom I had a job as a barista lately, and I am also building a computer right now, so it is tangibly something I have to use in order to do things efficiently. There is also I've been going to the gym lately, and knowing what is the most effective performance in tandem with the data that is given is also a factor. Lately I have been prioritizing doing simple tasks that are in front of me rather than thinking deeply with differing subjects, as I feel as if I think to deeply about things then that will make me spiral out of control, live I used to.

[@radishraven9]

hey Ren, do you have link for sweden for the ecstatic soul and for the infinite castle? Am thinking of a christmas present :)

[@fesnelybdis513]

If anyone "devalues Fe" because of its maladaptive ploys, it should be considered that when it (Fe) became mature and adaptive it brings well-being of the individual it is being deployed upon. Fe is the emotional ground whereas the feelings of others can become productive vs. irrational. Fe grounds the erratic energies or FI, then smooths them out for usability.

[@fuzonzord9301]

I feel like lot of really manipulative Fe users are ExTPs. They tend to employ it in ways that grate on me because they are unravelling the fabric of the society. Like how for example businesses use smiling employees to manipulate customers, to make them feel like the business cares about them personally when they are just another customer. And all the manipulation by advertisement industry too. I used to mistype as INFP because I have found a lot of the Machiavellian tertiary Fe noise in the environment grating.

[@mohdnazirmohdnainar5992]

hi

[@cindyc]

🤗❤️🕊️😻👍

[@treetoon_]

I've come across ENFJ's who devalue Ti to the extent that they don't think it matters what is true or false. That would be as if an INTP didn't care at all about others emotions. In my view this comes across as unhealthy. Is there anything one might be able to tell the ENFJ or is it just something that they'll have to figure out on their own? This kind of thinking generates tribal groups because neither of the sides care about the others point of view.

[@juice_lime5114]

This is also a reason why humans are social and still interdependant in different perspectives, their inferior function is the "growth" function, and anyone completely devaluing it would only find themselves stagnated on a biased perspective. In order to "coerce" them, you would need to present a viewpoint contradicting theirs. For example for INTPs that devalue Fe, they would need to come in contact with an Fi perspective. For example, asking them "Do you know what you are doing?" This really shakes them up, hard. Even if they resist unhealthily, you would literally see their ego cracking at the seams.

[@treetoon_]

@@juice_lime5114 Good point.