The INFJ Weirdness (and Other Types' Too)

[@wandering248]

Yes, I find INFJs to be relatively “normal” on the surface due to our Fe (There can still be an air of Ni mysteriousness there too), but our internal world is very strange, sometimes even to ourselves, and we can be reluctant to let others fully in who we feel may not be willing to understand our idiosyncratic, sometimes radical, point of view on the world. It’s definitely a dance of sorts that most people aren’t even aware is happening, and can make us feel isolated from other people while still participating in the “expectations” of our immediate social environment. It can be pretty exhausting this dance, I must say.

[@GyroLamb]

I find INFP's weirdness to be my favorite. It's so innocent and harmless and endearing. Makes you want to protect them.

[@BindingTheYoke]

Innocent.. you haven't met emo infp I see 😅😂

[@shannonlogue5585]

"I want to apologize for being so boring." Lol Hardly. But that was funny.

[@RensRoom]

Haha, thank you Shannon!

[@Cinderella-mc8kf]

That's what i think all the time😂

[@rehamb.o9534]

You are the most wholesome person that I’ve ever seen

[@RensRoom]

Thank you so much!

[@rolom3]

I'm INFJ and I definitely have my idiosyncrasies 😄But I have a very good filter that I can use whenever I understand that I should! However I much prefer expressing my somewhat weird thoughts and just being my unique self. I just started a jazz course and most of the other people in my year are weirdos too, they are also artistic and sensitive, they often talk about how things make them "feel". I've never been part of a group where there are so many feelers. So I'm beginning to feel normal for the first time in my life. I've never experienced this before and it's such a peculiar and pleasant feeling.

[@RensRoom]

This is great news! Also I'm happy to hear you're back to thinking you're really INFJ ;)

[@rolom3]

@@RensRoom Thank you! :)

[@diatomshells]

I remember a quote by Karl Lagerfeld that resonated with me once where it was said, “I don’t like standard beauty - there is no beauty without strangeness” and then I would have to admit “it’s” all strange. Everything.

[@RensRoom]

Good quote!

[@artistocracy]

Ren, I cannot add anything to what you’ve said because it fits well for me, too. I’m even weird to myself, in a nice way! I believe that INFJ’s enjoy their innocent unselfconscious , sometimes incisive, humour and inspired obscure creative thought processes as the comfortable norm. This idiosyncratic style we have is entirely uniquely coloured by our own particular individuality within being INFJ, so being identified as different or weird by friends and acquaintances without trying, is entirely acceptable. I’m glad to hear that I am not the only out loud talker to myself. 😅We’re so normal to ourselves that we forget that we’re not normal to everyone else, until we’re out amongst others depending on our level of coherence to their ears and eyes! Most people immediately discover how candid and openly friendly I am when I open my mouth. Honestly just being seen means we stand out simply by our dress and the way we look when we walk anywhere. I wear jeans mostly yet am stylish naturally, so am distinctly aware that I get looked at a lot because I’m tall and I can see them as I go past, and I have the sense that my mere beingness is different to what people are used to. That’s the best way I can say this.

[@JayDaMusicLover]

I tended to get the “you’re a weirdo/ you’re weird” more often than anything lol. I remember at first I would just wonder why and try to fit the mold of what was considered “normal”, which was really hard for me. I always tended to talk to myself a lot and that’s one of the things people always pointed out and why they called me weird. Now though I just embrace it and treat it almost like a compliment. I even found friends who share a similar level of weirdness as me, which was a total relief. What’s the fun in being “normal”, when being weird allows you to be your own unique person. I rather be weird than be a copy of someone else to be honest lol. Great video Ren!

[@RensRoom]

Thanks, Jay! By the way, a tangent: not sure if I ever asked you this but where is this music you make? lol

[@RensRoom]

Man I talk to myself all the freakin' time, and pretty loud often. You're not alone! I started making videos in part because I figured my talking to myself might be turned productively into some kind of video content :D

[@JayDaMusicLover]

Ren's Room No I don’t think you have asked lol. My user is one that I had for a long time already because I have always been interested in music. What music can invoke inside a person has always intrigued me and I always wanted to create music that would have that same effect. A majority of the music I create is just for fun, I do not really publish it anywhere. Mainly it is because I jump from idea to idea, so this causes me to not fully finish them. I do however go back here and there whenever I have time available, so hopefully one day I can finish something and share it. Yeah I always find it funny when people look at me like I am insane because I always ask them if they got a problem and they immediately become passive. Honestly, I am glad you are able to turn it into something that many people can enjoy as well! Maybe creating video content is something i should consider doing as well. Although, that might be in a couple of years because I am still trying to figure myself out lol. Thanks for your reply and your curiosities! 😊

[@Elodie_N_INTJ_Analyzes]

Since I am 2 I know we are all differents, but since this years, I know MBTI and cognitives functions : I like and embrance my weirdness to be comfy ! I am a paradox and I like to be like this, I like to see the world differently 2 level above (Ni + knowledge cognitives functions) As you explained in other video, Intuition is a strange way to see the concrete world, and to be an Introvert is not easy in this extraverted world. That's why Ni Dominants (INTJ INFJ) we are the most likely to be perceive as "weird". From my experience in life. There are 2 sorts of people perceived by an INFJ : _ The ones who find me boring, shy, useless, uninteresting, lazy, person who don't talk to me and who cause me problems in life. _ The ones who like me, find me interesting that I have good ideas, intelligent, adorable insightful, kind, nice, authentic, benevolent, have right, benevolent people. INxx we are weird in the sense we spend more time in our mind, than on the reality : spend more time alone, less social interactions, search meaning everywhere (we question everything, every rule, we often wonder why?). But I think we are the most nice, kind and adorable. Due to the Fi on 3rd and 4th functions, I think INTJ and INTP, can be perceived as strange, not social at all, less interaction with people. From my point of view of an INFJ : INTJ is similar to me cause we share Dominant and inferior functions. But INFP and INTP, I have more difficulty to understand them. I have chance to be an INFJ, my coworker next to me she is INFJ (confirmed by the test this week), my brother is INTP, and a coworker I like is INTJ. I think there are other INFJs, INTPs, INTJs at work, but I will not talk or observe their behavior to be sure. My manager is so kind, nice and a healthy good person, that it's harder to guess his type, probably an healthy INFJ. One day when I shared my professional/scolar experience to a coworker, he told me : Seems in this company most of people/coworker are people who doesn't knew what to do in their life. Maybe that's why we have some introverts and Intuitives types gather. That is very agreable to work in a quiet place, with rarely conflicts. The weirds ones at work seems to be the extraverted XD. Maybe that's why one left, cause he surely find us boring and not talkative ant too calm, I don't know XD.

[@SM-es2os]

Everytime I take the test I get the INTJ result. But when I watch your videos I relate very much to the emotional part of your INFJ description. I can detect descrepencies between what people say and what they are feeling very quickly. Often times people's body language will be far more honest than their words and the two will create a tapestry of that person. I don't feel as disconnected emotionally as INTJ are described as being.

[@sirrenn1936]

Weird is good, I embrace it now and I don't care what other people think. I used to care.

[@sirrenn1936]

What was considered weird as a child is embraced by people as an adult.

[@Neiljjm]

Finally Ren, you have named the elephant in the room! Yes, we have all felt weird and odd, not only within our sense of self but also in comparison with others. This has been where I notice it the most: it is the conflict I feel when I am in a large crowd. On the one hand, I want to connect with others and to harmoniously blend in with the best intentions possible and on the other hand, the fact that as an introvert, this type of situation does not, as an INFJ, draw upon any of my strengths or natural gifts and abilities. They contraindicate each other hence the conflict! In such a case I feel like a misfit who is just plain weird without always realizing that this situation is the worse showcase for the incredible things an INFJ has to offer. Thank you for making a video on this topic since, as the rarest type, I think we all feel like the multi-coloured, happy butterfly among a sea of drab, less cheerful moths!

[@JonasAnandaKristiansson]

This got me laughing out loud, related to the... weirdness. Pure humor just "being ourselves". Already in the start of the video I almost threw the tea out of my mouth because I "saw myself" in a way. I've heard a handful of times now, in different wordings of different people, that I am "a comedy with two legs" and so on. I have come to find that I'm the most joking-on-my-own-behalf person I've met, and people do seem to love my messed up shit coming out of nowhere all the time, both in words and actions. Quirks and "randomness", going " too far-very-fast" "jokes" as well, are common now when I reflect on it, due to your video. Thanks Ren! :D

[@selecter99]

Great thoughts. You excellently expressed weirdness in typology and really helped me identify with infj type although I’m still uncertain. Thanks for your vids. I really enjoy your sensibilities and peculiarities

[@RensRoom]

Thank you very much! Let me know if you reach stronger certainty regarding INFJ or any other type.

[@lisbroekman9750]

Haha! I couldn’t stop laughing after 6.42 so you have a friend who’s brilliancy is connected to his istpenis, who knew!! I thought they were just another boring mbti type! let’s have an interview with him! This is definitely an upgrade for the male istp😂

[@Elfen41]

I fully accept my weirdness and my eccentricities, lol. And I soooooo love Seinfeld whom I think may be a INFJ along with the writer Larry David. Watching you with your cat makes me miss my cat.

[@hopeinhumanity.]

There is so many times a day that I even talk to myself (out loud) and say “geez you’re a weird one Stacy”. And I cannot possibly imagine what my cats are thinking when I’m talking to them (I talk to them like they are mini humans). I have a SNL comedic type weirdness that comes out to those I feel very comfortable to be myself with. It’s my only escape from thinking about thinking.

[@jasoncg2956]

6:41 Hahaha!! He said IST-penis... I don't know why that was so funny to me, but I bust a gut lol

[@Jwet1100]

Got me too! lol

[@EllaChinois]

I have been called weird as long as I can remember. Even my mom called me weird. I think I have started to own my weirdness and be proud of it. The deal about it is I never understand why some people think I am weird. I guess they get bored easily but find it difficult to appreciate different ideas. It may be wrong to call them boring. I don't know what to say about that. And also I don't get bored easily. Seldom will I say things like I am bored(even to myself). I guess that is the only weird thing about me...Cats are cool weirdos. I need to get a cat.

[@Coneman3]

I think we are hard to put in a box. You have the more stereotypical geeks like INTP and INTJ, but we come across more human centred and overlooked as typically a highly intelligent type. Our intelligence is more rounded and ‘whole’ and thus is usually missed by others. Our Fe makes us seem soft and maybe even less intelligent because I think it is often associated with that. Our introversion and private natures means we don’t tend to talk about what really interests us, do from a distance we are dull and very normal when this is far from the truth. Our personality is largely cerebral and therefore concealed. We are unlikely to be nerds who build things. Also wanting to be social and also have alone time will confuse others. I actually find ISFPs a bit weird. Can be very dull and boring. EDIT: Also, lacking Ne and Te means we are less 'in the world' or streetwise. I see these latter functions as more practical in daily life and interpersonal communications in general. But the price of this makes you more 'normal' at the expense of being interesting in the way INFJs are. Our weirdness to others I see as being a good thing, because we are different, or dare I say, special.

[@tolstoy431]

Your last sentence Ren actually, SAYS it all......So profound and explicit........

[@ElusvOptmst1]

I've been called independently weird in a positive way. Always felt strange and weird through out my life and it have been hard at times, accepting my matrix way of thinking. Lately I have accepted myself and let things go and try not to overthink things and usually positive results happens.

[@shannonlogue5585]

I'm really enjoying this, by the way. I love musing type conversations like this.

[@heatherwhatever7714]

Some are boring and have to wear wild clothes to prove they aren’t really boring. I suspect the opposite could be true too.

[@Koffent]

I believe the term "weird" is a subjective construct of the social standards. Since INFJs are rare we don't exactly resemble the norm, hence why the average person would consider us weird. We are even subject to this, we behave in a manner that makes other people feel at ease in essence conforming to the norm. This in turn makes our quirks seem even weirder or odd, even to ourselves. I think we're all weird to someone. It's all a matter of how comfortable you are with being the "weird" person. It's a relief when you're able to be weird and not feel judged.

[@shannonlogue5585]

Did the video speed up? Or was it just me? :) I was already thinking that your energy seemed a little higher than usual and seemed to talk more than usual. I liked it because it seemed you were in slow and really enjoying the topic. But, just all of a sudden, the video and audio sped up super fast.

[@BindingTheYoke]

Some have outright said to me I'm strange or weird, most people just give me "a look" when I say something that shatters their world view in disbelief. 🙃 totally unintentionally of course.. 🤔 maybe.

[@ShadowQuik]

Yeah for the ISTP friend, SP musicians tend to be very focused on form as you said. They work with music like they’re sculpting it, instead of coming up with some vision in their head.

[@Calvan42]

0:44 seconds in at the bottom right corner. Me: KITTY!!

[@laurenceegan6136]

Hmmm. I've been called all of the things you mention here over the years too - but never disparagingly either (at least to the best of my knowledge.) In addition, I've always lived and worked in environments where it wouldn't be wise to stand out too much, and yet I have managed to blend in almost everywhere despite having tastes in almost everything you care to mention which could easily draw the wrong type of attention. You mention a kind of dance between the weirdness and the fe...would this include things that are done consciously by a person with the objective of "fitting in" to some degree, whilst also being allowed the luxury of "standing out" in one's own way at the same time; the ability to be able to express one's quirks without turning the spotlight on oneself too much?

[@RensRoom]

Yes, that's exactly when I had in mind when I referred to the "dance"!

[@laurenceegan6136]

@@RensRoom I'm sure people know I do this!

[@RensRoom]

@@laurenceegan6136 Maybe, but if you do it well and naturally, nothing's wrong with that :)

[@laurenceegan6136]

@@RensRoom Haha...of course! 😄

[@bevm1378]

How do I know if I am weird? I often feel different but now wonder if people think I’m weird! I have been told you are so funny so perhaps that is what they meant. You made me laugh several times and I don’t agree that you are boring.

[@hattifatteners548]

You shared a room with an Irishman! That makes a lot of sense...I thought you sounded Irish at first (and I still kind of do) I'm not even going to comment as much as I could on the weirdness part. I've been called 'weird' so many times in my life when I haven't even been ~trying~ (I appreciate your differentiating from innate and 'bestowed' weirdness since I never considered myself weird until I started to notice this pattern.) I'm also a girl (not sure of my type) so I think that makes the 'weird' accusations...different somehow?

[@domc40]

My weirdness comes from being an INFJ with a 458 Tritype. I can be assertive because of that 8, but all wrapped in Fe. That is a power combination. BUT...if I’m in a part of my life where my 8 side is being used too often brings deep depression. Assertiveness and Fe is a double edge sword

[@RensRoom]

Hi Dom, I'm an INFJ 458 as well! Wow, this is the first time I meet another of my kind. Kinda surreal!

[@domc40]

Probably that’s why I connected with your channel and your words. We are the same kind of INFJ flavour. I don’t connect at all with the most popular INFJ channels.

[@Owlsworthy]

ESTJs can be pretty quirky in my opinion 😂

[@45Seconds2Mars]

ISTPs can be quirky and funny with their interesting thoughts. One of the things I like about them. I usually like TP humor but some NFs can crack me up too.

[@RensRoom]

Hehe I'm the same. My brother (INFP) is without a doubt one of the funniest people I know. My dad is ENFJ and not really "weird" but hilarious too, though he could be his infectious laughter above all else!

[@enricio]

I miss the pain related to the weirdness. My soul connection made me not average. On the power side one can call me authentic which is rare. 🤫

[@thaisarvelos1]

Interesting view on the INFJ weirdness + the Fe use. I used to think that every xNxx were weird in unique ways, SJs were the absolute absence of weirdness, leaving the SPs in the middle somewhere and using this to try to type my friends and family hahah also, introverts tend to be strange more often than not (in the eyes of society). If you search 'mbti flow chart' on google images the first result is a fun chart that divides the types between weird people (NTs, ISTP, NJs - w/ the exception of ENFJ) and not weird people (SJs, ENFJ, SPs - w/ the exception of ISTP). I could agree with that, but I tend to separate them with no exceptions: N x S is an easier way to do it for me.

[@RensRoom]

Thanks Thais, I'll check out the mbti flow chart!

[@twistedsunshine3276]

I took some few test about Myer's briggs and the result is i am an INFJ. But it still give me doubts since they say it's a rare personality. I mean i feel flattered about it but for some reason i don't want to go shouting it in the whole world that i am one because i am scared other will question if i am genuine or not. It can be a little bit intimidating claiming anything you are and you're not 100% sure about it. I been called weird a lot and i even claim myself no doubt that i am weird. Like i only got interested in things if people stop talking about it. Like when the whole world is talking about this certain things i don't have any interest in it but when people stop talking about it i became more interested in it. I don't follow certain things that people usually follow. I do the opposite. And fashion wise, I rather choose the kind that explain my personality. Like i used to be obsessed with black or dark colors before because i think it describe the color of my soul. Not that i am all in darkness and sinister but in the sense that i want to be invisible as much as possible but on the same time i want people to appreciate me too LOL not visually but on things i am passionate about like writing or the art that i am making or on my creativity. I do have a lot of interest in some people but i find it hard to have many friends because if i have interest in something or someone, i should put my focus on it which sometimes make me frustrated because i find it hard to really do multi tasking but i get distracted easily too when i try to focus on one thing. You seem to be an expert in all kinds of personality not just in INFJ so i think you can easily figure it out if i have the qualities of a " real INFJ ". And if it turn out i am not, Can you please tell me why i am not? I hope this does'nt sound demanding LOL and i hope i did not waste any of your time reading this loooong messages of mine. Pardon my english too or even grammar. I tried by best though. NAMASTE! More power to you!

[@TaxEvasi0n]

I try and suppress all my oddities in my personality, or at least correct them into a more straight and narrow projection. I feel like I’m always being watched and judged. Around new people I try not to talk much. I hate it when someone I know starts talking to me around someone I don’t know. Sighhhhhhh

[@brian7441]

It would be interesting to hear what you thought of Geek Pyschology's RPG take on the INFJ, the Elf Hunter type?? Here is the clip. kzbin.info/www/bejne/sKvKkHhoeLekY9E and kzbin.info/www/bejne/rYayiqqaZtpji6M

[@MariaBM1]

Oh, so that's why you speak English with an Irish accent! (You had an Irish flatmate. It all makes sense now...)

[@leighlong7005]

Im guilty of sometimes expressing weird random thoughts about various things and can get strange looks from others near me. Cute kitty, do you love cats and do you think this is an INFJ thing? I have cats that I adore and most times I'd rather be around them than people.. lol..

[@JakeLikesJoking]

Leigh Long I’m much more of a dog person and I’m also an INFJ, so it’s probably just a personal preference thing outside of personality typing.

[@squeebaby2683]

There are many topics I want to taco.

[@Frank-sd8xr]

The INFJ “Fe harmony” slogan is BS. Fe is not unicorns and rainbows and Ti bites hard. The stereotypes regarding this type are insulting.

[@RensRoom]

I agree with you that Fe limits itself by no means to harmony, but if the INFJ is healthy, it will certainly feature in their decision-making.

[@zeroangelmk1]

INFJs with underdeveloped Fe will care less about harmony but will still be under the 'spell' of Fe which affects their integrity and authenticity in negative ways. When we start embracing our Fe and using it for good can we find our integrity and bring balance/harmony all while having all the benefits of Ti's 'sword of truth'. I can be extremely biting and savage when I want to be, but I don't bring my claws out unless it's absolutely going to do some good.

[@Frank-sd8xr]

Pope Ocelot, That can apply to anyone.

[@Frank-sd8xr]

Healthy or not Fe is featured in their decision making. It’s rather authoritarian/invasive in nature and a mature INFJ will have that under control.

[@daren7997]

👌🦉

[@context-lich]

Heh ISTPenis