Poundland Special: More Original Figures | Ashens

[@q306005]

Boy, if Funtastic keeps up with these original figures, they're gonna have people ripping off their figures. It'd be a company called Fantustic, and just looking at their figures drives children insane. They're a hit with the old gods though.

[@andymadden8183]

99th like. I normally wouldn't care, but "I guide others to a treasure I cannot possess".

[@hannahridgeway4746]

😊

[@nicholastosoni707]

...Actually, I think that Minotaur guy uses his battleaxe to mislead people. "He went...THAT way!" (_points in both directions_)

[@someweeb3650]

Nicholas Tosoni i dont see how he could point in both directions without pointing the axe in front of him, making it seem like the person he was talking about went wherever was in front of the minitaur

[@nicholastosoni707]

xX_1337MLGSOMTHINGOROTHER_Xx The axe looks like it's pointing in both directions. In other words, it's a comedy prop.

[@someweeb3650]

Nicholas Tosoni i know, but how would he point it

[@nicholastosoni707]

Oh, he'd just hold it up and point to it.

[@bakuya99]

+Nicholas Tosoni Lel

[@bronzdragon]

I'm not sure if you care, but axes were actually used in Pirate times during boarding. They were great for cutting ropes and masts, and if the crew of the ship you were boarding decided to hold up in the hull, you could cut down doors with it. Besides, it's a weapon that rewards strength over finesse, so if you weren't very good with a sword, you might do well with an axe.

[@Kikoskia]

The sad part is is that I in fact own said screeching demonic hell knight. He has pride of place on my shelves since the day I got him.

[@lawfulpotato]

oh hai kiko

[@gamman1]

Oh look my favorite LPer.

[@donttouchyourjoystic]

I envy you. One day, I'd put it in my child's crib and wait. (plus it kinda looks cool)

[@mikeyg9958]

Even 8 years later?

[@ThereMayBeLions]

Men with Slightly Disapointing Hats sounds like a Parody band of Men with Hats

[@JanoyCresvaZero]

Aren't they the guys who developed Organ Trail?

[@ThereMayBeLions]

Mark Marchesini Maybe

[@私は日本語が話せません]

the bonesauce no that was the men with many hats,but not the men who wear many hats

[@Clipazine]

YoursTruly_GTG You can dance if you want to, I guess. I mean it's up to you. And if your friends don't dance that's cool too, I don't want to be intolerant of anyone's opinions or anything.

[@anomishfish]

@Chris Handsome hello there

[@Foxxnioxx]

"Journey to Creation" sounds like a religious tech death band.

[@doctorcraptonicus7941]

+Ni Oxx - Yes, but "religious tech death band" sounds like an exploding ecclesiastical trouser-supporting garment accessory....with a digital watch in it.

[@PPGIRL420]

+Ni Oxx It really does, now that you mention it.

[@yellowvillager8498]

or a video game

[@fduranthesee]

I thought your name said DANK pot

[@AgentTasmania]

DudleyScardsdale And I'll close with Tassy and a Hint of Shrimp.

[@atomicdancer]

Yes! I've got *Screeching Demonic Hell Knight* from _Journey to Creation_. He's the best, the most satanic of all of 'em; and when he tells me to do things, I must obey.

[@kass4294]

We all must obey.

[@shan._.louise7086]

ALL HAIL SCREECHING DEMONIC HELL KNIGHT

[@heyitzjake3830]

Nat714

[@sentimentalmariner590]

What is thy bidding my master? SSSSCCCCCRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTCCCCHHHHH!?!@#$%!@#?! Twill be done my lord.

[@faenethlorhalien]

Good subject. Subject gets to live another day.

[@DyslexicBasatrd]

In my opinion Ashens is one of the best youtubers. He doesn't try hard to be funny, and just generally nice to watch. Keep it up man

[@bean_bttf3]

I’m your hundredth like. Congrats.

[@samholdsworth420]

​@@bean_bttf3I'm your first like congratulations 👏🏻

[@bean_bttf3]

@@samholdsworth420 Thank you, thank you

[@godzillafan4033]

Who would have thought watching a man open crappy action figures would be so entertaining. It definitely works though. I salute you good sir.

[@AI_and_I_Lyrics]

For a "Dyslexic Basatrd" you sure don't seem to be Dyslexic...

[@Woodencoins]

Mr Ashens always seems to open packaging as if he desperately requires the contents or as if he is enraged.

[@MathewHaswell]

Rip, Tear, Rend!

[@IanC14]

He's the Doomguy. Rip tear and rend!

[@joethehunter]

he is enraged that he desperately requires the packages items so that he can make fun of aforementioned items to make youtube money

[@WheezyShotta]

*"ROBERT COP. ROBERT COP."* *"Joel have you been making heavy metal songs again?"*

[@Ghost_Of_SAS]

The second SWAT guy is clearly the Scout from Team Fortress 2, only with a helmet and a police vest.

[@naurunappula1]

Ghost81 Thermite from R6S

[@mon94key]

You cured my Sunday boredom for 17 minuet's!

[@icecoldheard]

minutes*

[@mon94key]

why the bloody hell did my phone change the spelling? :|

[@icecoldheard]

Ever considered thinking that it's trolling you?

[@Megadedify]

For 17 French Dances? That's pretty impressive :3

[@scottforeman6377]

13:37 Now we know what happens to the failed Big Daddies. They're packaged up and sent off to Poundland. And to think. We would never have discovered this if not for Stuart Ashen.

[@goblinrat6119]

A big steel hand on a pole was actually an ancient Chinese weapon. Mind, it was mostly only a stylized, mostly ritualistic pole weapon. Then fingers were long and sharpened so you could gouge at someone, and it was heavy enough to bludgeon with. Then again, even that was only somewhat larger than an actual human hand. But it's probably where they got the idea from.

[@EvilDoresh]

Yeah, that makes sense. Any stick with a heavy enough end can be a weapon, though that thing seems to be too elaborate for such a task. The size increase doesn't surprise me. Most war hammers you see in comics, games, movies and whatnot are basically anvils on a stick o_O

[@xXSpikeMLPXx]

Funtastic lives off the 10 pounds they get a day.

[@cleanycloth]

Roughly £3360 a year. That's more than I get, then again I don't have a job.

[@vynlscratch.630]

You sure it's not 2

[@odie4464]

Ashens lives off giving them that 10 pounds

[@Inunah]

S.W.A.T. - Super Weird Alien Team. Still not as weird as a figure I found at the store I work at, which looks like super angry blonde bodybuilder Ashens with sunglasses and a huge damn spider on his torso that may not be a tattoo.

[@someweeb3650]

TheInunah well, i got a good idea for hentai or at least some sort of rule 34 of that...

[@ariannasaunders9253]

+TheInunah I love your profile pic~! xD

[@lampini]

+TheInunah I know exactly the figure you're talking about!!!!!!I got mine on a crap wrestling figure set.

[@bluestraveler2342]

thelnunah cute profile pic

[@AgentTasmania]

Did you get a picture onto /r/Ashens?

[@ChickenPika]

Believe it or not, that hand thing is an actual weapon. It's Indian, and it's known (in English) as a "backscratcher" mace. It's not anywhere near that big, though.

[@smb-c3po]

ChickenPika Do you mean as in Native American or as in from India?

[@ChickenPika]

Sora Song From India.

[@smb-c3po]

ChickenPika Good. Then maybe you do understand there is a difference.

[@kernal1127]

Didn't sun Tzu use one?

[@thekingsman9773]

And Garnet and Pearl probably use it when they fuse.

[@FoxMan_FF]

Pirates of Alternate Dimension Vlob sounds like it could be a damn cool toy line.

[@Turskaruhtinas]

Or a movie.

[@GmodPlusWoW]

Could have had a French cartoon series in the 80s.

[@nickl1483]

@@GmodPlusWoW Dude, that peg legged pirate is a knockoff of a Pirates of the Caribbean Barbosa figure Ashens reviews in a later video, I shit you not

[@Overhazard]

The Burned Leg Pirates: Didn't make it too far into the Grand Line.

[@MartinKincl1993]

This is the first time I've seen a teabagging action figure.

[@gmcnewlook]

What about a line of ashen action figures from pound land.....

[@TheDudiest3Dude]

That bit when he says 'Are the drugs too much for you?' in a really low voice kills me!

[@AlexiBexi]

6:55 glööckler?

[@NormanZimmermann]

könnte hin hauen^^

[@user-yk3zp2wp5g]

Wat

[@Verlisify]

Ashen, more Poundland! more food! more videos more often!!!!

[@bS0up]

Asking for more food? What kind of a monster are you?

[@EvilDoresh]

bS0up I understand him. I myself won't be satisfied until Ashens has to deal with dead duck embryo. (What? That's can't possibly be worse than that century egg.)

[@grimsleybishopafton5840]

Holy shit out of all the places I would expect to see my favorite poketuber this was the last one.

[@ikernickolas6940]

You all prolly dont care but does anybody know of a method to get back into an instagram account..? I somehow lost the password. I appreciate any assistance you can give me!

[@wadejeremy7140]

@Iker Nickolas instablaster :)

[@john_hunter_]

It would be cool if you made a series that looks into the development process of these figures and has interviews the designers.

[@TheBoodle23]

Another Ashens Poundland action figure special, they never get boring..........

[@tonyperani]

Stuart is, has always, and always will be the best KZbin personality. He knows it, too.

[@sweetpeachnectar]

stuart, what do the shop assistants think when you always buy absolute crap? :D "it's that crazy guy again! let's get more of this funtastic stuff, because he is the only man on earth who is gonna buy it!!" xD

[@Perkustin]

Clearly he wears a new comedy disguise every time, each more hilarious than the last.

[@mmazingace]

Well, if he visits the same shops every single time, as I imagine he does, the clerks probably know him by now as "that guy who buys our crappiest shit and makes funny videos with it". He's been doing this for years now, eventually the clerks must have wondered why he kept buying this shit.

[@p4t21ck]

They probably think either he has a handicapped child at home, or he shoves them up his butt.

[@Whitepaw_Automotive]

0:25 Poundland's beast from the east.

[@bentramer682]

"I think he's shoplifting." Complains a pirate.

[@Louis-nz1od]

My perfect afternoon. Sit back and watch Ashens videos.

[@96ZB]

I believe that after Skies of Arcadia, SEGA now holds a copyright on "pirates of the sky".

[@TheDutchGhost]

Another new addition to my collection of funny pirate names; Derpbeard. Be nice to him when you encounter him on the high seas, he really tries his best at pirating.

[@soysucc]

WE ARE NUMBER ONE

[@Contradium]

Feeling the adverse effects of Daylight Savings Time (I live in the US), it's always nice to wake up after a crappy night's sleep and watch good ol' ashens in the morning.

[@3PICish]

The metal hand on a stick was a weapon designed to tear the shields from enemies and slash at open targets. The creator of said weapon was invented by sun tzu

[@temoure8146]

I love you ashens! You honestly cheer me up when I have a bad day xD

[@TheSkeletonVA]

6:16 , Ashens predicts new meme two years in advance.

[@averycamacho1909]

MKB0NES he is a true meme master.

[@smithintern-tainment7868]

I’ve noticed Ashens is a real stickler about what kind of weapons the children’s toys have XD

[@BHPAddict]

I love that noise of opening boxes.

[@Ravenclawrian172]

It always cheers me up when I see you've uploaded a new video.

[@guitarpick2002]

4:57 Yee-arrrrr is hilarious! It sounds like a pirate yawn, a dog growl, and a wet fart put together!

[@stocking-fiend2619]

Thank goodness you uploaded today. I've been having a terrible recovery after my surgery, so this makes me feel better.

[@DarthSears]

That belt on the Pig-head knight had the symbol of Lordaeron.

[@jaym8299]

I have been binge watching these for days on end!

[@kirbyfan4]

I wanted ashens to torch something. Been a while sincethe last burning.

[@wesleythomas7125]

@Samson Themighty welcome... TO MY BARBEQUE!

[@SheepyCentral]

An Ashen's Poundland special. YES!

[@TheMeatwade]

I cant stop laughing at this it is hilarious my hat is off to you sir.

[@bunnithebunbun]

The first video of yours I ever watched way back when I was a pre-teen. The nostalgia is real.

[@MattHolbaev]

I wish a Funtastic employee would hurry up and watch Ashens videos

[@BrainBoltG]

I was in a Poundland about two days ago and came across those "Power Warrior" figures, I was wondering how long it'd take before I saw them here.

[@Marscow]

Being that the toys are probably made in China, it makes sense that they would include an ancient Chinese weapon, the Zhua, which resembles a big hand on a stick or at the end of a rope. It was a real weapon at one point. Thing is, it was more of an ancient era weapon and a pirate would have been as likely to use it as, say, a halberd...

[@zacsmith4341]

Weren't halberds like those fucking massive axe, why would a pirate use a massive axe?

[@Marscow]

Zac Smith They wouldn't be likely to use a halberd at all. Hence, my point.

[@zacsmith4341]

Flick oh sorry, misread the comment

[@tarafeatherbe3049]

Zac Smith

[@PumatSol]

I'll never know how this is so entertaining.

[@rockerseven]

i think the scorpion tattoo on that pirate is the same one that appeared on a wrestling figure in a previous video

[@Razzlewolfflight]

I think Funtastic is single handedly keeping Ashens in business. Well that and Chef Excellence.

[@MysteriumArcanum]

Oh, and mustn't forget Hunger Breaks

[@QuantumVLOG]

The story of Captain Derp-beard. Geoff used to be a normal man, he went to the supermarket and bought his usual things, bread, milk, eggs, cheese and all of that other standard generic shopping items. His life was to be changed for the worst when one day after going to the shop he saw a homeless man outside just stood there. He approached the man to give him the spare change. Geoff was a kind caring person. The homeless man thanked Geoff and then started to lick his face, Geoff didn't know how to react to this so he said "Arghh". Little did Geoff know that he awoke the curse of Captain Derp-beard, whenever a homeless man licks the face of a man who responds with "Arghh" the curse will befall them. Geoff ran home back to his wife and family. During his sleep Geoff started to change and mutate. A metallic hook shot out of his hand and his leg became rotten then wooden, his facial hair grew rapidly and his teeth became yellow. His wife awoke first, screaming as she did not realize Geoff. She started beating him with a steel toe capped boot until his face was horribly disfigured, Geoff probably suffered brain damage as he started to have strange obsessions with the sea, one day he left his family and set off on a make shift raft he had been building secretly in the garden shed. He found a hat that a small child had bought and was wearing, he took the hat and ran to his shed where he sat there for days on his make shift raft. The smell had built up so much that his family inside the house could smell him from the shed. Geoff's family told him to leave them alone and never to return. He ran to the nearest pond with his raft, set it afloat and then laid on it. Geoff pretended to be a pirate to all of the people walking past the pond until some guy came along and threw rocks at his raft. This upset Geoff as he no longer had the raft he had built, the only remaining achievement in his life had just been destroyed by some low life. Geoff took action and slammed the hook into the guys face, Geoff was arrested and sentenced to x amount of years in prison. He then met a black man called Gabriel, Gabriel saw Geoff and made him his bitch. After the sentence had been fulfilled Geoff was released a changed man. He still had contact with Gabriel as they bonded over bondage while sharing the cell. Geoff went home to his family to find that they had moved out, he found their home but they were on a cruise ship somewhere in the Mediterranean, Geoff stole an old replica of a pirate ship and went after them, a storm hit and his family were killed, Geoff still roams the ocean searching for his dead family, then a poundland representative saw Geoff and decided to make him into n action figure. Sorry about that, if you actually read the entire thing then I applaud you. Its 23:47 at the time of typing this and i'm very tired so... Quality is basically non existent. The end.

[@davidverbeek4849]

not bad at all, the one thing that could have made it better was some line breaks as with out them it has the block of text problem making it harder to read.

[@QuantumVLOG]

@@davidverbeek4849 oh hey... Wasn't expecting a reply from a comment I made 7 years ago! I've re-read the first comment and God damn I used commas a lot back then.

[@LadyKubwa]

I think what annoys me about Funtastic is that I don't think they even use other company's moulds that they bought second-hand. It looks like they literally just buy figures that look slightly the same proportions, make them look like they're part of the same set, and package them as their own 'original' figures.

[@benanderson89]

ThePoeticPony You're surprised by this? It happens with everything from laptops to cars.

[@LadyKubwa]

Oh yeah undoubtedly it happens, but it's more the fact that Poundland's a pretty big company in the UK, especially during recessions, and this sorta stuff's going unmonitored in a pretty professional business.

[@benanderson89]

ThePoeticPony Yeah, but at the same time its a variety store thats sells odds n sods for a quid.

[@icecoldheard]

I laughed so hard while watching this video, that i almost got abs!

[@Azzaroth]

The hand on the stick is a chinese weapon called the iron claw, the fingertips on the hand were normally highly pointed and the hand itself was smaller with the fingers splayed a bit more open.

[@PycasneEesost]

That's about as useful as a flying guillotine.

[@Yubl10]

It's been 9 years. Yes It's an ancient Chinese weapon, but what would a bunch of European pirates or sword and sorcery figures (some of the chap Mei figures that were fantasy based also came with that weapon) be doing with it.

[@hyenalord]

You know, those SWAT figures remind me more of a game that (I think) was called Rogue Cops. I only ever saw it in the arcade, and your character looked pretty much exactly like they do, particularly when you get the big, stupid laser gun item so you can more effectively fry the various fish-themed pirates. I miss that game.

[@mvn1l643]

It looks like the person painting in the factory that day was being tazed at the same time.

[@Ladderthief1]

MOOOOOOOOBS.

[@weeredpanda]

You really have just cheered up my otherwise dull Sunday! xx

[@nicholasballay496]

Now introducing Fidel Castro in a robe with a peg leg

[@nickl1483]

I just noticed, that one is based off the Pirates of the Caribbean Barbosa figure he reviews in a later video!

[@Spike-Prime]

Oh my god, I don't know what it is but "Geoff the Ork that happens to have a Unicorn horn" just cracked me up X'D Come to think of it, I think I'll make a web comic series now.

[@KakarotOwns]

How did he not burn some of the toys, shocking!

[@lucky-to-live2162]

I stumbled upon your KZbin channel and fell in love with it

[@Gh0stClown]

8:05 technically, that would be someone to his left. Hang on, this is probably why I don't have any friends, isn't it?

[@spamanator666]

8:57 guy is clearly Peter Falk with a goatee... Excellent likeness, they scored on that one!

[@raptorjesus713]

"I forgot my helmet so I had to borrow gran's dish" i dont know why but i had to pause the video bc laughing too hard *may be high*

[@suewootton2566]

LOL 😂 love this video I could watch it 100000 times love your videos

[@howardelcano165]

I would pay to see Ashens, TotalBiscuit and Yahtzee locked in a room together with a 1-hour Justin Bieber mix while they try to collectively review it.

[@Captain.Scarlet]

Like me it would be after 2 nanoseconds NO LET ME OUT followed by my head exploding

[@RealBond101]

This is so 10 years ago it's unreal! Then again, so is my profile pic.

[@fmsyntheses]

I actually do like that noise. It's one of my favorite parts of these videos.

[@CurtisAlfeld]

7:00 Badly painted Billy Mays pirate.

[@kyoudaiken]

I think mankind will look that way in 2030 or something. :D

[@nickl1483]

@@kyoudaiken Here's some Ashens trivia, that pirate figure on this video is based off a Pirates of the Caribbean Barbosa figure he reviews in a later video

[@iancarson4953]

I laugh so hard every video you make and never stop making the videos please!!!!!!

[@WeeabooASMR]

Funtastic the LJN of Ashens.

[@Visleaf]

1:08 Actually, I do.

[@daDonn]

The SWAT with the pose? - GANGNAM STYLE!

[@LiviuDragon]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Aquelll]

And well... "Axe, as not used on ships probably.". Have to give points for Poundland since axes were the most important tool and weapon on ships during the age of sails.

[@Digger318]

If you ever visit Hong Kong you would like the shum sui po toy street, its like tat toy heaven. 20+ stores of toys, some are tat, some are high quality.

[@Ryhnhart]

Some of those weapon molds are AT LEAST 20 years old. I remember seeing that gargantuan shotgun/machinegun/polearm thing a lot back then.

[@w4rr10r11]

The first Baird figure reminds me of Eddie Izzard.

[@JHenryEden]

Eddie Izzard? wasn't he one of the Geniuses behind the Monty Python-Movies?

[@GrokMonkey]

JHenryEden Nah. John Cleese has referred to him as 'the lost python' because of his sense of humor, but Izzard wasn't directly involved in any of the Python comedy stuff, as far as I know.

[@TheThaddius]

I thought he looked more like julian clary lol

[@blooBerry371]

I love coming back to these Poundland videos😂

[@Verdius24]

3:26 does that boar thing have the crest of Lordaeron from Warcraft on his belt? So much for originality. I think that Blizzard could actually sue them over that.

[@fretzil]

Cheap toys do that. Even those "collectable" ones.

[@PaperManga]

I should know better than to eat cereal while watching Ashens' videos. Now I've made a fucking mess.

[@SuperLuigisWorld]

the pirates feet weren't burned, he was using armament haki

[@googlesaurusrex]

Poundland rips off One Piece now? Shitty Luffy figues incoming

[@SuperLuigisWorld]

wouldn't be surprised kit they began a line of crappy OP figures that play 4kids dub audio when you press a button

[@YourRulerSkeletos]

***** Please no.

[@googlesaurusrex]

***** Wouldn't be surprised. I saw a really bad Ichigo Kurosaki figure in there once.

[@LordDragox412]

Or he could just be wearing socks with holes. Seriously, nobody thought about that?

[@meman29]

The "Journey to Creation" figures actually had cool designs in my opinion. If they were better articulated and had some kind of backstory, I probably would get a few

[@TXFDA]

To be fair, those police figures weren't THAT bad. Not good, but compared to most of the stuff in these videos, they're at least passable. I think part of that is due to most of them having something obscuring part of their face, so there's no eyes to screw up. Notice the one that DID have eyes, looked horrible. I think if I got them as a kid, I would have been perfectly fine with them. A little bit of blobbed on paint over the arm wouldn't bother me too much.

[@CharlieKGames]

I'm sure that Ashens keeps Funtastic in business.

[@BurntFaceMan]

So YOU'RE the reason I could never find any of the Bionicles of war 2 figures =P damn!

[@lordcrayzar]

You could have quite the epic battle with all those figures.

[@JuicyPlams]

5:23 Is that Paul Chuckle?

[@amost84]

Barry

[@DourifGirl]

Giant, demonic codpiece. That is my favorite thing ever.

[@MakoClover]

'pirates of the air' did you mean: Skies of Arcadia

[@TheHutchy01]

Captain Derpbeard looks like Peter Falk in a really fuckin' low budget production of the Pirates of Penzance

[@hartage4]

Ashens, the only reason they're doing we'll is because of you XD

[@danielflanard8274]

These faces are faces that only a mother could love.

[@trunksrocks1]

+Daniel Schaeffer a very drunk mother.

[@DrBreakfastMachine]

10:43 OP OP OP OP OPPAN GANGNAM STYLE

[@vinegar4556]

Oh my god the "SWAT Academy" figure looks like a Bulldozer from Payday: The Heist.

[@LeXaTrOn28]

Daft Punk - Get Lucky reference in description ? ???????????????????????/

[@silverpothead]

True

[@tribblier]

Whats the profile picture and banner from?

[@LeXaTrOn28]

Zac Roebuck just art

[@tribblier]

Kyriolexy shame

[@LeXaTrOn28]

Zac Roebuck yeah