Worst Villain Ever - Airfix Action Figures | Ashens

[@GmodPlusWoW]

Rubber trousers?! That's GENIUS! It hides the joints typical of articulation, and makes the joints look more realistic on living figures.

[@Stribog1337]

Yes the little cartoony plastic humanoids look like real humans now . Reminds me of how HotToys covers the figures with rubber skin

[@samholdsworth420]

Almost as genius as diarrhea pants. You know plastic pants with the elastic ankles and waist that capture and contain your uncontrollable diarrhea

[@bigconvoy9850]

Rubber trousers can deteriorate amd fucking crumble

[@thecommenter578]

Yeah but why don't give them rubber torso as well?

[@TheTurnipKing]

I don't know if genius is quite the right word.

[@joshbi]

Doctor War without a helmet is just Kryten from Red Dwarf

[@Muzer0]

Yes! I thought so too.

[@1975dlh]

I was just about to say the same thing

[@MediumRareOpinions]

If he fires rockets out of his hands I don't want to know what he's doing with the groinal attachment.

[@jondoe-qi3vo]

Its spare head 3

[@cryotek3624]

With his helmet he is an acroyear from Microman

[@SergeiMosin]

The roadwork fellow is clearly a very specific 80s slasher villain. He works as a hotdog vendor by day and does horrible things to horny teenagers by night.

[@Stribog1337]

He sells them nfts

[@superplushtiman7ti075]

Just the idea of using his victims as meat for it sounds odd

[@RarebitFiends]

I remember the exact scene he appears in Lucio Fulci's The New York Ripper.

[@jonathanharwood1255]

@@superplushtiman7ti075 would be a very good story though. Hasn't been caught yet because the evidence is in the food he sells.

[@superplushtiman7ti075]

@@jonathanharwood1255 yeah, makes sense

[@HO-bndk]

Dr War is clearly a master of unarmed combat.

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

Wilhelm Albert Reginald Krieg was born in 1906, he studied egyptology, but by the time he finished, it became clear that the golden age of egyptology was long gone. And it's a pyramid scheme anyway. Enraged by the realisation that he has wasted his like, he took on the moniker of Dr War (from his initials and the fact that he thought his family name sounded more menacing in english) and set out to destroy civilisation and create more ruins that he and his apprentices could study. His most powerful weapons are his arm mounted rockets, which he acquired after he ripped out his own arms and replaced them with elbow-less rocket launchers. His biggest weaknesses are the fact that he has only two rockets (really should've thought that through beforehand) and that he can't bend his arms. Driven to madness by an itchy nose, Dr War is the ultimate threat to humanity!

[@linalmeemow]

"Doctor War, what is he good for? Absolutely nothing! Say it again."

[@cvmaniac7286]

I get this reference, haha.

[@linalmeemow]

@@cvmaniac7286 It's only taken someone 11 days, I am disappointed. Not in you though.

[@cvmaniac7286]

@@linalmeemow I did not watch the video when it first dropped. So, I was a bit delayed there, haha.

[@WeirdWonderful]

I love how they gave Dr. War a proper detailed face, far more detailed than the original Airfix figures.

[@An_Onion]

Too bad that he was modeled by Kryten from Red Dwarf so he looks like a novelty condom.

[@fietehermans9903]

And he doesn’t have Lord Faarquad hair!

[@martenmelin8595]

I think the face of Dr War is taken from the native americans in the Action stars series.

[@mikececconi2677]

That road worker looks like he's from a Devo cover band that got sued by Devo and had to change their costumes just enough to not get sued again.

[@samholdsworth420]

It's like a sus (🏳️‍🌈) Buckethead

[@ALIEN-DUDE]

Divo

[@brianhebert6152]

Are we not men? We are OVED!

[@hjalfi]

I wasn't expecting Dr. War to be the spitting image of Kryten. Maybe those arms are actually supposed to be vacuum cleaner tubes.

[@peterjf7723]

I think that you are correct. Dr War is clearly a Series 4000 service mechanoid that must have been subjected to serious reprogramming.

[@frankowalker4662]

@@peterjf7723 I came here to say the exact same thing. As soon as Ashens removed Dr Wars helmet I yelled, 'Kryten !'. LOL

[@Matt1yu]

It may have taken him 3 million years, but at least he cleaned up his act.

[@markstammers1923]

Beat me to it, I was going to say the same thing.

[@ultradawg1]

The grumpy head version 🤣

[@TheZapp009]

Ashens X Buckethead: The crossover we didn't quite know we needed, until we got it.

[@OrangeHarrisonRB3]

Buckethead kicks ass, but he switched to a plain white bucket instead of KFC for trademark reasons.

[@GmodPlusWoW]

Didn't Buckethead do one of the soundtracks for John Romero's Sigil .wad?

[@cosmicjenny4508]

@@GmodPlusWoW Yes, and he's also recorded lots of other songs for video game soundtracks. He also specifically recorded "Jordan" to be used in Guitar Hero 2!

[@Murdocke89]

@@cosmicjenny4508 I have the Jordan on expert achievement on Xbox 360, broke my fingers getting that.

[@asteroidrules]

Not to be confused with the Ashens X Lord Buckethead crossover.

[@64jimboy]

The Sheriff beard removal is the most I've laughed in about 2 weeks. Thanks for another great review.

[@chrisrobson8540]

couldnt agree more ......i think some wee came out

[@samholdsworth420]

Stuarts laugh makes me laugh...

[@theypeedonmyrug]

Ooooooooohhh

[@ara_ara-]

That was cursed

[@SkeletonDanceParty]

"Aw shit here's batman" is my favorite Penguin quote

[@BodywiseMustard]

favourite*

[@babykata-dt3ys]

​@@BodywiseMustardfavorite is actually closer to the original Latin root.

[@fietehermans9903]

I mean… mid-seventies was the time of disco and punk, so wearing latex trousers wasn’t *TOO* strange a thought!

[@First-Name_Last-Name]

Maximum Funk

[@thecheese4255]

And silver boots

[@sabre0smile]

He’s not actually meant to be a road repair worker. If you read the back, in German it gives you a little bio. He’s actually Bert, the anthropomorphic traffic cone. They discontinued this figure after they kept turning up on top of statues heads mysteriously

[@Stribog1337]

A Road Kommando, implying traffic cones have a military presence in Germany

[@tutunaku]

@@Stribog1337 I think they were part of the West German Operation Gladio-equivalent

[@drworm73]

Please tell me you are being 100% serious. Please.

[@TC-th1ey]

My first reaction was that he looked like a tube of toothpaste with his cap as the screw on top.

[@del-boysnostalgiatvads7416]

@@Stribog1337 your comment is inappropriate

[@Ashmoleon2006]

that road worker looks like the prisoner work crews that work on the sides of the roads in the US

[@mickmarston8748]

I could have sworn that when we saw Dr. War's face we were going to get a Kryten impression.

[@DevinGates]

Well, spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska, I thought I'd be the only one :D

[@TanjoGalbi]

I literally said out loud as soon as the face was revealed: "That's Kryten!" lol

[@tasmedic]

@@TanjoGalbi Me too!

[@sogero2]

The Autons reference made me really laugh out loud. Gotta love those classic Doctor Who series!

[@cky2chris]

"Futility belt" Thanks for the new term Stuart

[@favoritemustard3542]

You know what... ...I never bother wearing mine...

[@Atanar89]

"Doktor in Friedens- und Konflikforschung" does not roll off the tounge as nicely as "Doctor War".

[@BrotherRobbie]

Dr. Jeff War, Professor of Wood/Metal Shop, Corrugated Confections and pyrotechnics at Cambridge (High School, not the University). What a jolly face for a villain! :D

[@favoritemustard3542]

@LabRat Knatz ...pretty sure everything pre-parentheses is the actual title!

[@allygetch]

If he's a water-adjacent police of course he needs a hat that large to act as a boat in an emergency, or at the least a very portable flotation device.

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

Maybe the water police just had budget cuts and bought off old soviet hats

[@UntaintedSKS]

Dr War is actually an evil Kryten Robot if you look at his face he does look like Kryten

[@TanjoGalbi]

Exactly! I literally said out loud "That's Kryten!" as soon as his face was revealed! lol

[@TheTurnipKing]

I'm thinking Sparehead 3

[@Ironman1o1]

@@TanjoGalbi I legit said outloud "What the fuck, why is it Kryten!?" He must have got into his locked despair file.

[@CandGoods]

Doctor War, famous at university for taking the Art of War and turning it into a Science , wrote an entire dissertation on it and everything.

[@ethanisfancy]

Dr. War has taken inspiration from the POP Station fighting game by throwing his own arms at his enemies.

[@Mckjaminn]

5:22 that sherrif's "beard" looks more like a mask for one of the ninja characters from mortal kombat

[@theantithesis1]

"Wasserschutz" translates most often into "water conservation." So that guy being arrested on the box must've been throwing empty beer cans into the Rhine. That gun seems like a lot of ordinance for catching litterbugs.

[@douro20]

These are the people who are responsible for enforcing river traffic laws on Germany's navigable waterways.

[@BodywiseMustard]

Ordnance* Ordinance refers to rules or law

[@walkwithcrowdsjh9364]

Is it just me, or is Doctor War the best Kryten action figure never made?

[@Stribog1337]

Yes you're right

[@owllymannstein7113]

Exactly what I thought as well

[@Space_Reptile]

the box where you pointed at to say "realistic detail in the arse mostly" says "Action Stars can sit properly" basically showing that you can put them in and on scale models of bikes and whatnot

[@stephengrambsch4232]

One of the best things about road work guy is that we see from the sheriff that they could make a vest, but it was a conscious decision to go with the smok.

[@BlackburnBigdragon]

Nothing says "Action Star" more than "Road Work Guy"\"Barber-Pole Man"

[@Stribog1337]

He's a Strassenbau-Kommando, how cool is that?!

[@DustyMagroovy]

The road crew guy looks like a prisoner on a chain gang. Orange jumpsuit and all.

[@sebastianwlodarczyk]

Credit where it's due- rubber trousers on an articulated figure, and the fact they haven't turned to snot by now are really impressive! I wonder which extremely toxic material is still keeping them in shape;] (I'd be very disappointed if they're just made out of silicone... Old toys made out of safe materials? Preposterous! At least, looking at the accessories, we still have the good old choking hazard.) Also, I love that Doctor War (PhD, no doubt) looks like Kryten from Red Dwarf after a rough night out:D

[@Stribog1337]

Ugh, talk about it... i got a Playstation 2 in a box and the joystick rubbers turned into practically - wet glue

[@sebastianwlodarczyk]

@@Stribog1337 Dang, I don't envy you... I've seen that happening on few appliances, but I'd imagine that coating on thumbsticks is much thicker than on, i.e. a wireless mouse- that must be a lot of sludge... You probably know that already, but IPA and a lot of patience might help cleaning that up (joysticks will end up slippery and definitely not mint condition, but swapping them for aftermarket parts- either just grips or the whole stick, might be the best shot for retro gaming)

[@First-Name_Last-Name]

It's probably rubber infused with Lead, Asbestos, Thalidomide, and Agent Orange.

[@RarebitFiends]

@@Stribog1337 Yikes! I wonder how it was stored, I've never seen that happen to a controller before. Did you crack open the console itself to make sure the internals have not similarly degraded? They were all stored in the same conditions. 😥

[@luasdublin]

@@Stribog1337 me fixing old stereos , every tape deck made before 2000, the belt drive has either turned to old cracked leather strips or black goo.

[@hydro_storm4527]

The Cowboy's hat is too tall? As an American, I'll just say that a lot of the old westerns had the cowboys wear ridiculously large hats. Look up the character Hoss from the show Bonanza and you'll see for yourself. The figure is actually pretty close to scale when compared to what was on TV at the time 😂

[@Nomed38]

Aye, the original Stetson hat was the height of the hat the character Hoss wore in Bonanza.

[@peepo2560]

Never too tall, buckaroo

[@coyoteartist]

There was a very good reason for those hats.

[@brianm6337]

Dr. War has a BA in Marketing, and is an undergrad in Hospitality Services.

[@bletheringfool]

Dr Jeremy War. What a gormless grin he has for supposedly being sinister

[@Thumper17]

My father is a roadworker, can confirm they've never looked like that.

[@Avellania]

As a German I can confirm that even over here they never looked like giant candy wrappers.

[@256ElNino]

@@Avellania but now I somewhat wished they did.

[@SeraphimKnight]

I have to thank you ashens, for without you I would've never thought of the hilarious phrase "sad man's futility belt".

[@PunksterOS]

5:40 It's Kryten from Gunmen of the Apocalypse.

[@Deadly_Laser]

War, what is it good for? Not grabbing stuff, apparently!

[@lanog40]

I hope Stuart knows that he has effectively created an army of Dr. Wars with his prize offer

[@face4radio]

(bong rip) What if there was, like... An army.. MADE ..of war....

[@incredibleflameboy]

That chuck Norris/auton moment had had me laughing for around 10 minutes now. Every time I stop it finds its way back into my head

[@user-uhhhhhIforgor]

6:30 He honestly looks like someone advertising Whataburger, but doing a very bad job at it

[@JanusVesta]

With his helmet off Dr. War looks like a really cheap toy of Kryton from Red Dwarf.

[@gateroozeink5061]

I was thinking exactly the same thing!

[@DeAthWaGer]

smeggin' hell we all think alike! Helmet on he looks like Gwar's Balsac the Jaws of Death with his mouth welded shut.

[@jimhjortsberg2990]

Maybe from a episode where Kryten becomes this ridicules character only to reveal he still has his normal personality once he takes his helmet off? Honestly feel like something right up the shows alley.

[@EvilDoresh]

Dr. War looks like a Chinese Hopping Vampire (mostly due to the stiff arms) cosplaying as a mixture between Darth Vader and a generic robot.

[@b.a.m.4135]

Hey Ashens, along these same lines there was a line of Dragon Ball Z toys produced by a company called Irving (or something like that) here in the US. I dont know if they were ever produced across the pond, but they put out this line that had four figures in it, and the draw was that they could be normal or super saiyan. Instead of just coming with extra heads or whatever they had these ridiculous full body rubber condoms that you'd slip over them making them chunky and off model, and, of corse, destroying any and all articulation. It's glorious.

[@KasumiKenshirou]

Was the toy company Irwin?

[@Powoga]

Definitely Irwin toys, and those specific figures were called _Secret Saiyan Warriors_ Found a list of all the Irwin figures on a site called dragonballfigures, and the whole range was kinda all over the place. Figures with random weapons they couldn't possibly hold, some weirdly obscure characters (Remember Minotia, from _Wrath of the Dragon_ ? He has his own figure. Pretty sure that movie wasn't even dubbed in English at that point), Dragon Balls with inconsistent size and coloring... wild.

[@asteroidrules]

I know a disparity between box art and reality is to be expected, but I gotta say it's really stark on these guys. All the artwork is drawn in that old comic style that covers them in wrinkles and makes everyone look like they're over 50, but then the actual facial sculpts look like children.

[@tomsenior7405]

Doctor War? or... Evil Kryten? Bloody loved this episode. And to think, Airfix went from making Combs to producing the finest Model Kits in the World, via these crappy figures. Excellent episode Ashens.

[@ultradawg1]

Definitely the Kryten with the grumpy head 🤣

[@ArcticFox63]

First thing I thought when he pulled the helmet off was evil Kryten.

[@robread-jones3698]

Sheriff sans beard looks somewhat...umm...adult? Also, Buckethead is an awesome guitarist.

[@samholdsworth420]

Imagine how much better he could play if he didn't have a bucket on his head

[@gariko]

Dr. War without a helmet looks like a pretty good Kryten action figure

[@dylanmilne6683]

Earth's fate was sealed the day Dr Waugh's hospital discharge papers were misspelled following his accident at the cardboard tube factory.

[@chrisdowns1987]

The water police and the futility belt of justice! 😂

[@cahillrebel]

7:08 That is the best description of anything I’ve heard in a while. I usually don’t bust out laughing at simple jokes but that hit different.

[@menkomonty]

That Batman figure reminds me of that episode of Only Fools and Horses where Del dressed up as Batman XD

[@kevinmaher4609]

The road worker looks like Buckethead wearing a Christmas themed pillowcase

[@cyberleaderandy1]

That first figures face looks a bit like the British comedy character Jimmy Krankie and Dr War looks like the actor who plays Kryton from Red Dwarf 🤔

[@scottobear]

I came to say the same! A rather good Kryten from Red Dwarf!

[@SuspectCascade]

Fun fact kryten is played by Robert Llewellyn who also stared in a random movie called ashens and the quest for the game child

[@peterjf7723]

@@SuspectCascade Well remembered, that had totally slipped my mind.

[@fourthdrawerdown6297]

My Christmas list is now complete. River Police James May, Sheriff Covid, Megalomaniac Kryten and wet weather Batman. Marvellous.

[@Kirk00077]

I’ll have you know Dr. War earned his PhD-his thesis was titled “The influence of rocket jetpacks and low-visibility helmets upon history” and it had an impact on global strategic planning for decades, until the weaknesses in his theories were shown by the failures of Commando Cody

[@RastaSzopen]

Now i know from where Count Binface got his inspiration for his helmet!!!! Mystery solved. Thank Ashens!

[@funkyfox2041]

"Must have been difficult to tear off the last one" reminds me so much of the Young Ones bit. "Oh I've tried that Rik, you can't drive the last nail in!"

[@TheTurnipKing]

Immediately thought of Bender from Futurama

[@fandangobrandango7864]

@@TheTurnipKing probably influenced by The Young One's.

[@VampireofEmotion]

I wasn't planning to go to any conventions any time soon but the idea of cosplaying as Doctor War is almost too perfect to resist

[@Sleepysod]

I remember these 😢 a shop called Fords in Allenton, Derby used to sell these - we had sooo many over the years. Everything exactly as I remember

[@billyd4eva]

Doctor War's infamous catch phrase is, of course "spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska"

[@ellaisplotting]

If the feel of the rubber legs freak you out, you should try a Phicen. They look hyper realistic, super flexible but no visible joints barring ankles and wrists, but they feel like human flesh, dense, warm, velvety. They're also surprisingly heavy so the combination of texture and weight makes most people nearly drop them upon first holding them 😆

[@KPWSinister1]

I was busy folding laundry while the vid was going and got startled by the intro of Dr War. Damn you, Dr War!

[@ryanbouchard2907]

The second Dr. War's helmet came off, I swore that was Kryton from Red Dwarf!

[@brianartillery]

Captain Eagle and the military policeman were my favourite figures, and the Mummy's tomb playset was as cool as any toy I'd ever had. Good video.

[@mrlordsotherson3091]

The Mummy’s Tomb was amazing. One of my favourite toys too

[@brianartillery]

The big hat on the policeman made me think of the ridiculously big hat worn by General Ouromov (Gottfried John), in 1995's 'Goldeneye'.

[@daglemj]

I'm mostly just impressed that the near fifty year old rubber pants haven't turned into goo or dust.

[@No1.OriginalTrilogyStarWarsFan]

Great video, I picked up one of these at Stafford Toy Fair last year.

[@FappleJackity]

i love it when you get excited about toy history

[@becky1992]

The “candy man” road worker looks like one of those people that your parents warn you about not taking candy off of at the park when you were 7. 😂😂 either that or someone who is advertising aquafresh toothpaste in the 80s/90s 😂 Or as Ashens said, kfc bucket man or barber shop pole man 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@ChristinaGXL]

The later proper size action men had rubber legs with knee joints inside on an armature, I wonder if they got the idea from this.

[@jezz2k]

These remind me of a similar late 70s early 80s action figure range that came in small brown oblong boxes and looked a bit like smaller versions of Playmobil figures. They came with accessories such as road work signs or motorbikes. Can't remember their name for the life of me.

[@amstrad00]

I can fully see Doctor War being a Doctor Doom type character. He just needs a bit of a costume redesign and an interesting backstory.

[@CraftingStudios1337]

Dr. War achieved his PhD in WAR studies from the University of WARwick

[@XH1927]

I genuinely laughed for the first time in months when I saw the Sheriff's face with out his removable beard and hair

[@bkzach]

These are some of the coolest action figures I've ever seen, and Ashens reacting to them is just the toupee on top of these odd German figurines

[@pinkubusXtreme]

Is Dr. War good enough to be a candidate for the shelf of interesting items?

[@MoultrieGeek]

Without a doubt

[@Stribog1337]

Asobutely

[@Draconyx13]

Jesus Christ, the sheriff getting his beard ripped off sent me into the most prolonged laughing fit I've had in a very long time! Thanks Stu!

[@Firethorne]

Thumbs up for Buckethead! Weird dude, but super talented. His guitar is a bit unusual too. Those red dots are buttons that act as a killswitches that can cut the signal from the pickups.

[@SDNimm543]

Lord Buckethead's Minister of Health.

[@EpicLebaneseNerd]

i think the sheriff on the box looks more Charles bronson to me, also, this might be the first time i heard Ashens say the ''MF'' word in his whole videos and it was really weird.

[@stephendowle4266]

The ‘road worker’ is clearly the most efficient worker ever…he is dressed as a traffic cone 🤣🤣

[@joshbi]

I was so convinced he was saying "Doctor Wall!" and somehow that's even worse than what it actually is

[@TheDeepImpact965]

He don't need no education!

[@samholdsworth420]

You must be American put subtitles on lol

[@joshbi]

@@samholdsworth420 I'm English lol just have crap headphones

[@KasumiKenshirou]

@@samholdsworth420 The subtitles are auto-generated and also think he's saying "Dr. Wall", but not consistently.

[@RobertoRafaf]

Imagine been called a roadworker and not an STRASSENBAU KOMMANDO

[@Stribog1337]

Unacceptable

[@wildkinraccoon37]

The roadworker is giving me serious Devo vibes

[@PurpKing4377]

DEVOOOOO!

[@LoveofTech]

5:57 "Gray rubber trousers" is my favorite band. edit: the road worker is the lead singer.

[@conradhardman7254]

The 3rd figure looks like a prisoner doing comunaty work lol

[@SuperPerry1000]

I lost my shit when you took off Doctor War's helmet. He looks like Kryten from Red Dwarf.

[@freudinator]

Dr War with the police hat reminds me so much of Florian Schneider from Kraftwerk.

[@StormDatIsApproaching]

The big hats, cherubic faces and goofy clothes just make them look like a bunch of lil fellas play pretending and that just adds to their charm honestly

[@allyjoykiller]

I'm 99% sure I had the batman and superman that my grandparents bought me from a home store attached to the local Kwik Save. And a Evil Kinevil with the same crappy cape style too

[@wiggle_duck9063]

Doctor War must have a confusing time any time someone says "unhand me, villain!"

[@GarthBeagle]

Doctor War's helmet looks like it was modeled off a drawing a seven year old made of one of the Pigs in Space 🤷‍♂️

[@SupahLinkio]

Dr War looks like a love child of Kryten and Palpatine. I love his face.

[@HanMasho]

Wow! "Futility belt" is really strong. Can't believe I haven't heard that one before. I promise to steal that at some point!

[@matthew-Williams]

5:39 Kryten is looking very shocked at seeing a double Polaroid.

[@9Der6Ketzer9]

I was just watching the Aunt May figure review and then this happens... the joy, the happiness the... fuck this, i'll just watch the damn video.

[@Nocturnimancer]

Your fixation on just the weirdest garbage is just so interesting from the 2nd hand enthusiasm.

[@sharona1981]

'These things are approaching...fifty years old, almost? That's terrifying.' And so are you, mate. 😉 Also, Doctor War. Huh. What is he good for? Firing his own arms at you, apparently. Is he one of the playable characters in City Fighter?

[@favoritemustard3542]

Huh? Absolutely nutty!

[@jubuttib]

I mean that first hat at least looks perfectly in scale... For a North Korean general.

[@anumeon]

Never before have i associated Airfix with tat.. That has now changed... (The therapy required will be to purchase a Spitfire kit and assemble it i think)

[@cellardweller315]

I lost my little brother two weeks ago, he was one of your biggest fans his name was Michael but people called him itch, his friend got you to sign a mouse mat that you signed to itch from Ashens, he was soo chuffed It was on his bookcase as a special thing You made his life a lot happier and for that I thank you