Preventing suicide in the construction industry | Vince Hafeli | TEDxAberystwyth

[@carolinechery]

Thank you, Vince, for being a voice for those who need it most.

[@jujurocker]

Vince's personal story adds so much weight to his message. Truly impactful.

[@TracieJLee]

You are a good man Vince, we feel you...

[@mintylava4123]

Dude, your story hit me hard. Life can be a rollercoaster, but sharing your struggles is like throwing a lifeline to others. Keep spreading the positive vibes!

[@mateomardenson3022]

The vulnerability is super inspiring, we love to see it 💪🏼

[@thereallyfatcat]

Education and conversation are key to changing the narrative. Important talk.

[@farahjuniper9214]

Wow this had me from the get go, being reminded that we often forget the human element in construction... I'm so guilty of this I don't think I've ever really thought about how taxing being in this industry would be

[@remigradilenga4121]

The raw honesty in this talk is truly commendable. It's a reminder that mental health should be treated with the same urgency as physical health and I appreciate that

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for watching.

[@undeadmerlinisalivenow]

I appreciate his emphasis on compassion and empathy when addressing mental health issues. We all have a role to play in supporting each other

[@julestempest]

I think so too, and the more we can support one another maybe the better it gets on an overall societal level

[@izayahmayson]

Man I had tears in my eyes for so much of this talk. Mental health matters in _every_ industry, and construction is no exception.

[@themostofall4250]

arguably it should have the most focus considering it's mostly men who work in it

[@janiceglanders]

Thank you Vince, this is such a valuable contribution towards breaking the stigma 💜

[@cyruslandon]

I just want to thank him for his courage in doing this, believe me for a bloke this is not easy to do.

[@ZigWagon]

Vince's message is powerful: being a good listener can save lives. It's a simple yet profound takeaway. We often underestimate the power of just being there for someone. Kudos to him for bringing this to light.

[@themostofall4250]

definitely, such good advice for anyone.

[@ThePackHunter]

This has made me rethink how we handle mental health in the workplace. It's time to support our colleagues better and create a more understanding environment.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you.

[@nataschaweiss]

This talk brought up so many important points about the stigma around mental health. Let's work towards a culture where expressing vulnerability is seen as a strength and an opportunity to strengthen bonds

[@StarfireStarleena]

It's really crazy to hear how pervasive mental health issues are in the construction industry. Hopefully more discourse like this will make a difference.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for watching and learning.

[@aylamorris]

Life is a tough game, and you've proven to be a real MVP by overcoming those challenges. Your strength is commendable.

[@annmerrychristmas]

I'm not even in construction and this talk makes me want to support my teams mental health in better ways. A wake-up call for all industries I think.

[@riverjaspartile]

silence can be so loud when it comes to mental health. glad Vince is speaking up...

[@josievannorman]

Same, if everyone just spoke on what they were actually feeling the world would be such a different place

[@wuyattakeita3883]

Everyone needs a support system, even the toughest of us all.

[@josievannorman]

Sometimes even especially the toughest of us 💙

[@oo_eddie_oo4204]

Your honesty about the societal pressure in construction is refreshing. It's time we talk about the mental health challenges in tough industries, it seems like there's so much more than what we know of

[@mintylava4123]

I agree, I think unless you're in that particular industry it can be really hard to understand the struggles that go with it

[@sandralewandowski]

Acknowledging that you don't have to 'fix' everything but just be there is a crucial insight. Thanks for sharing.

[@kenfletcher1306]

The emphasis on the importance of difficult conversations is spot-on. It's not about solving everything in one talk, but about opening up those channels of communication so that everything _can_ be talked about freely.

[@bonniehavel]

Thank you for shedding light on the silent struggles many face. Let's create environments where people feel safe to share their burdens and seek support.

[@ameliasands]

Mental health needs to be a safety priority too. Glad Vince highlighted this.

[@josievannorman]

I don't know how they would manage it as a safety priority the way they do physical health but there are so many things that could be put in place to just offer some mental health support

[@harperleigh1709]

Mate, your story's like a blockbuster script. Life threw you some plot twists, but you're the hero pulling through. Big respect for sharing the real deal.

[@luisasanchez5532]

More leaders need to open up like this and be honest about mental health. It can't be just this guy whose had an experience like that.

[@conradthelegendwhite]

This is a great step in the right direction, well done

[@miatta6299]

I appreciate the honesty in this talk. Mental health is such a big topic and honestly I don't know how men cope, especially in industries like construction where the pressure to be tough and strong at all times is so much more amplified than normal spaces.

[@iamsamfemia]

This has really challenged my perception of what a workplace is responsible for. Like it makes sense that the physical safety is such a priority on construction sites but I never thought that companies could be held accountable for the mental health aspect as well

[@josievannorman]

I'm not sure they can be "held accountable" in terms of people suing them or anything along those lines but they definitely could be providing a lot more support

[@deepfocus1540]

Agreed! Construction workers are the backbone of our society, and their well-being matters. Time for the industry to step up and echo this sentiment.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for your support.

[@deepfocus1540]

@@vincehafeli9691 great message man, keep going... its important

[@keithpotter7366]

heavy stuff, but spot on. good to know someone is doing the right thing.

[@JValence]

heartbreaking to hear Vince's story but it's so important for him to have shared. It opens up the conversation.

[@themostofall4250]

💯💯💯💯

[@jeanetteward]

It's heartbreaking to hear about the personal losses the speaker endured. We need to ensure that no one feels like they have to suffer in silence.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you.

[@SixtySecondsOrLess]

I think something that's understated is a lot of the time our work dynamic/relationships are making up so much of our social interactions.

[@giovanni-is-here]

This is something that's happening everywhere, so there are conversations we need to have more often

[@katyabradova]

Okay I was choked up from the moment he talked about reading those goodbye letters to his most valuable employees. That is so emotionally intense and I can't imagine having those just sitting in your desk drawer in preparation.

[@rangatvespaldy]

Your closing words on the power of listening hit home. Sometimes, just being there and listening can make a huge difference.

[@themarybasse]

The call for education and awareness in leadership is spot on, sharing!!

[@mintylava4123]

Absolutely, imaging how much better it would be coming in to an environment where those in charge prioritized this

[@fredbrodersen2734]

Sharing this for sure

[@ehsaankumer]

As someone who's lost loved ones to suicide, this resonated deeply with me. It's time to break the stigma and prioritize mental well-being - for everyone

[@arianaasherton]

Ending the stigma around mental health starts with conversations like these. Let's commit to being more compassionate and understanding in our daily interactions, because you never know whose in need of some compassion

[@chesterwatson2387]

I never realized the extent of mental health issues in the construction industry. It's time for companies to step up and support their workers beyond just safety protocols.

[@erikdangor]

Breaking the silence on a topic like this, by a guy directly involved/impacted is pretty impressive. Hopefully by initiating these conversations we could help to save lives.

[@themostofall4250]

yeah, it's huge. here's hoping the industry pays attention

[@julestempest]

I think so too, if we can just keep the discussion going and normalize things a bit more there's no telling how much or who it could help

[@yannicarliso]

Vince's bravery in sharing his personal journey is remarkable. It really puts into perspective the silent battles many in the construction industry face. It's a wake-up call for leadership at all levels to foster open dialogues around mental health.

[@RantrumDiva]

Absolutely. It's amazing for him to have spoken out like that

[@ElegantEye]

Yup this rings pretty true for me, it's incredibly rare to hear about mental health in male-dominated industries.

[@IHaveDenverSoul]

The analogy about showing up with physical pain versus emotional pain is striking. We need to treat mental health with the same urgency. Great point!

[@justanormalboyreallynormal]

It's inspiring to see someone from the industry step up and address the mental health stigma, I think conversations like these can truly save lives.

[@vincehafeli9691]

We begin with one conversation at a time. Thank you.

[@sadfacesforall]

Sending you lots of love and strength! Your vulnerability is a beautiful thing. We need more people like you breaking the stigma around mental health 💖

[@simonoshlor]

I agree, it's really refreshing to hear this kind of chat from a man

[@jasminelovell]

Yessss we have to normalize in order to move forward and imrpove

[@shannonpscofield]

It’s crucial we start these tough conversations at work. Great talk!

[@RantrumDiva]

Yeah at work and also outside of it. Like if you socialize with the people you work with you should make more of an effort to be aware of what's going on in their lives

[@melrobertsreal]

I think we all have a role to play in creating supportive and compassionate work environments, for a lot of us that can be done by just being supportive and compassionate at work.

[@alanpotsypotts]

This talk made me realize the importance of being there for others, even when it's uncomfortable

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for taking something away.

[@BlingHive]

really moved by Vince's story. It's high time we prioritize mental health in every industry.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you.

[@omarputal]

This talk made me realize how much we need to change the culture around discussing mental health. It's not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of strength to ask for help because resilience isn't about just copping it over and over, it's about knowing your limits and protecting yourself.

[@julestempest]

I love that take and yes knowing your limits is crucial and also setting the boundaries accordingly

[@rinanoshinikov]

I can't believe the social pressure in construction is so intense. Your call to educate leaders and change the narrative is a game-changer. Way to break those stereotypes!

[@skyec8562]

His words are a beacon of light for anyone who may be battling their own inner demons. Amen and God Bless

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you.

[@caligsimpson]

The part about asking directly if someone is suicidal is bold but necessary. It's time we break free from outdated stigmas. Kudos for pushing it.

[@gerdefrederick]

Addressing mental health in the construction industry is long overdue

[@agcocoa]

What he went through is a testament to the human spirit. He has endured so much but pushed through the dark night of the soul and is now using his experience and pain to create a better world for those in his same position. Incredible.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for the kind words.

[@kiarakillian]

Gosh I hope we see change across sectors moving forward, there are way too many lives lost already.

[@rubylcharlotte]

The part about not being allowed to express feelings at work is sadly relatable. I work in disabilities and healthcare and it can be a lot but there's this pressure to just stay positive that's honestly kind of toxic and definitely leads to burnout

[@glennhamilton3rd]

I've been saying for _years_ that mental health should be included with OH&S and I only have experience in hospitality. It would be incredible to see the construction industry take a lead on the issue and from the sounds of things it's also where it's most needed

[@bobbywie]

Geez this talk packs an emotional punch. He's absolutely right though, about asking the hard questions and then helping them to find the right help.

[@simonoshlor]

Yeah I think it's important when someone opens up to you you don't just coddle them, you actually help

[@KozomoBlur]

I can't believe the suicide rates in the construction industry are so high! This is such a vital call for change. We need more leaders to get on board with addressing these issues.

[@imanitruez]

Yeahh this is pretty heavy stuff... Thanks for keeping it real. Mental health's a tough game, and it's about time we start talking about it without the judgment.

[@simonoshlor]

💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@haileypattern7666]

Learning about the proper way to ask someone if they're svicidal and how to offer support was really helpful, thank you

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for watching and sharing the video.

[@thephilosopher59]

Your doing great work here! The mental health stats are recently climbing dramatically year on year, and in male dominated industries, or even in families, being able to express emotion in a heartfelt and respectful way requires a huge shift in communication leadership. Its not so much about being strong, as accepting the vulnerability within us and knowing when its time to speak, stand up, create change or leave. I read that anger is the expression released when your soulfulness is violated, the hurt is deep inside and misunderstood. That's very hard to release when the doors are closed.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for your support and kind words.

[@the-coffee-lover]

The most important things are rarely discussed, like how we feel.....

[@therealbellasantarosa]

The loss of your family members in '89 hit hard. Your strength to keep going and face the world is commendable. Thanks for the real talk on dealing with pain.

[@mintylava4123]

Yeah it was a pretty brutaI part of the story...

[@kenfletcher1306]

I don't mean any offence here but I think calling how he dealt with the situation "strength" perpetuates a lot of stereotypes around how men need to act. He's even said that the way he mishandled all that grief contributed to the suicidal thoughts.

[@vincehafeli9691]

@@kenfletcher1306 I absolutely did deal with it wrong. I should have talked with someone. Anyone. I didn't need to be a "man", I should have acknowledged that I needed support.

[@felipeecoelho]

Wow I had no idea things were this bad in construction. Some of those stats are downright scary.

[@peoplepower100]

I think there's something really powerful about acknowledging that you don't know how to help someone whose feeling suicidal, but that you're still _there_ and willing/wanting to listen to them. It's not always about having the answers for someone but just that willingness can do wonders to make a person feel seen.

[@jasminelovell]

💯💯 the rare times I've opened up to someone and they've been like "I know exactly how you feel you need to do xyz..." It just has the opposite effect where I actually am just mad at them? Like, no, you don't know exactly how I feel and that won't work for me... even if it's solid advice lol I don't know what's wrong with me

[@dino1416]

This is a powerful reminder that behind every tough exterior, there might be someone silently struggling. Let's normalize conversations about mental health in the workplace

[@my-own-boss]

I had a guy I worked with that was always sorta down and really quick to bite your head off... I still thought of him as a mentor though, he was a really great guy and then he was just really happy one day and brought in all these old silversmithing tools he had because he knew I wanted to get into it. That weekend he committed svicide and I can't believe I didn't put two and two together or just realize what was happening to him and try to be there for him more

[@AzimuthMindspace]

I was watching another talk about depression and this woman was a therapist talking about how suicide ideation is so common pretty much everyone thinks about it and I was kind of blown away to be honest. I personally hadn't realized it was such a common thought pattern and now hearing about this?? Geez it's time for a change

[@kenfletcher1306]

Wow that is a bit concerning isn't it?

[@Cheyenne1989]

If we are the combination of the 5 people we spend the most time with, and we spend the most time at work.... well it makes sense for us to try and make those relationships as positive, joyous and supportive as possible.

[@phillipnorris3rd]

My dad took his own life, it took me years to deal with it, and maybe I still am. I'm not sure I would get my mom to watch, though I think it might help her. She never got over losing him.

[@janetsplace1953]

Thanks for sending this, yes I'll never forget Tim.

[@jodikennedy8886]

This is really sad but good on you for taking steps to deal with it. A lot of men just steep in their pain and that doesn't help anyone

[@DashiellAskin]

I think it's important that you don't put pressure on yourself to "deal with it" - grief is not linear.

[@frasernicholson8509]

You can move past the grief without moving on from the person.

[@umitkrca]

The statistics on suicide in the construction industry are staggering. Had no idea. Wow.

[@rapid-transit]

His childhood sounds like a dream with all the camping, boats and horses... very different to how I grew up in the inner city but then the challenges faced later in life are so intense. Life definitely is so full of twists and turns you can never take anything for granted or think that someone has it "easier" than you do

[@sadfacesforall]

Yess! It's easy to get into a mindset of thinking you have it worse than everyone else and then slowly your empathy wears off... not a good look!!

[@AzimuthMindspace]

Yeah absolutely not, you never know what's happening behind the scenes for someone

[@sofiatclara]

Feeling incredibly moved by Vince's message. Suicide prevention shouldn't be a niche topic.

[@vincehafeli9691]

Thank you for watching and learning.

[@makiweshter]

I think it takes a lot of strength to open up like this. Personally I couldn't imagine being so candid about my mental health even with close friends let alone a room full of strangers.

[@rapid-transit]

That's not a good sign dude. You should find someone you can be honest with - even if it's just a therapist

[@jasminelovell]

I get what you mean but part of me feels like doing it in a room full of strangers would somehow be easier? The room full of strangers is far less likely to ask questions and judge you lol

[@jasminelovell]

@@rapid-transit Nahhh I get where he's coming from and I agree it takes a lot of strength

[@theclassicraphaelsanchez]

I used to really live by that quote from Rocky that goes like, "it's not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much you can take and keep moving forward." I always thought it was not only cool but really summed up what strength means but what happens when you reach that point where you can't take anymore? If you've also been taught that you can't talk about your feelings or ask for help then yeah.. doesn't leave you with many options when that time comes

[@_mama_tea_6590]

My husband worked with a man who was the loveliest, funniest, most charming, God loving person I'd ever known. He would come for dinner on Friday nights. We had him over one night and he left with a smile, hugged me and said he'd see me next week. We never saw him again and I still just can't understand it

[@julestempest]

that's really sad. I think the never knowing why part is the hardest

[@LocomateMachine]

I hope that enough people start realizing this is an issue, maybe it could help change some peoples perspectives and attitudes around what men actually go through

[@janetsplace1953]

I never realised there was a specific study on this, and you know what? it's right that there is. Thank you, Vince!

[@jodikennedy8886]

I agree, the more information we have about this stuff the more it helps us to understand what's really going on

[@bobbywie]

I think if anything we need more studies like this, so we can understand what's going on

[@simonoshlor]

there are literally studies about shrimps walking on treadmills

[@jasminelovell]

@@simonoshlor lol wtf?? what do you even mean

[@geraldemery1417]

I love the idea of mental health being included in safety conversations. With stats like the one around the 5:40 mark it is indeed an occupational hazard.

[@frasernicholson8509]

It could really help change the stigma if it was normalized in that way.

[@newcenturyboy]

absolutely. we need to stop separating mental and physical health so much

[@peoplepower100]

Same, putting a spotlight on it like that also helps shifts the conversation into mainstream

[@brunodstone]

This is a moving story for sure, now if you think about the dudes who aren't even high up the ladder and are doing all the physical labor on top of things, all the literal pain their in as a result. Makes sense why those stats are so high

[@chantalbrovic]

Powerful reminder, that even the strongest in society can be taken down by mental health issues.

[@WormholeHaven]

The way you've worded that, it comes across pretty harshly

[@jasminelovell]

@@WormholeHaven does it? I think it sounds pretty standard

[@aaronsswank]

I left construction for these very reasons about 15 years ago, just zero support or understanding for when life hits you hard

[@pagetderosier5267]

I've never really though about the societal expectation on men to behave certain ways in terms of hiding their pain and emotions... didn't realize how tough it must be until he started talking about having to act macho at his fathers funeral.

[@Usyard]

Mental health is overlooked in a lot of workplaces and this just goes to show how detrimental that can be for the workers well-being.

[@mintylava4123]

Yeah I think mental health is overlooked everywhere, if it was prioritized maybe it wouldn't be up to a workplace to have to manage it.

[@AzimuthMindspace]

@@mintylava4123 This is such a great point.... I think it speaks volumes about the work-life balance most people have if the workplaces have that much responsibility

[@-joanna-wang]

Communities need to step up. We can't just rely on workplaces. Churches, community centers, and local organizations should be involved in creating a supportive network for those in need.

[@ListHeist]

Yup, this happens. Had a friend working on a site where their crew leader hung himself - no warning or any hint that something was wrong

[@jodikennedy8886]

Ahhh I was not ready for him to go into it. When he said, "life can change" I knew it was about to get heavy but I was literally in tears by the time he got to the twin sons... so much pain for one family to endure.

[@DashiellAskin]

Yeah, I wasn't expecting that much loss.

[@tyronecaojr]

Sobering statistics. We need more awareness and action on this issue.

[@RantrumDiva]

I feel like those statistics don't even really reflect just how bad it is. Like it's a big number but when you've actually seen it in real time it's just... there are no words for it

[@WormholeHaven]

The most important steps forward for mental health IMO are awareness and compassion. The more honest and pervasive about breaking the silence people become the more we'll come to realize just how much _everyone_ is struggling right now.

[@rapid-transit]

I think you're right. I said it before but it's so easy to think other people don't have it tough - even more so when people aren't talking honest and openly about it

[@sadfacesforall]

💯💯💯💯

[@simonoshlor]

This is both refreshing and scary to think about. The thought that everyone is struggling right now... that's a bit confronting. Why is everyone having such a hard time?

[@AzimuthMindspace]

Yeah this is what I'm starting to realize too, from these comments and some other talks I've seen it seems like pretty much everyone is struggling atm

[@jessiesangster]

Oh man the call from his wife at the start... it's heartbreaking to think that she knew, so much so that she even knew where he was going to do it

[@meganfreed1989]

It had me in tears literally from the get go

[@vasttrouble5368]

How can we work towards changing societal expectations, especially in male-dominated industries? His experience definitely putting a spotlight on our need to perceive vulnerability as a strength.

[@AzimuthMindspace]

I agree! No idea how to go about changing that kind of stigma for industries though. I guess it would have to be brought in with the induction procedures? That's after pinpointing _why_ it's happening in the first place too

[@kenfletcher1306]

I think just through talking about it, bringing awareness to it. I also think it's not just about the industries but about being a man in general. Lots of unhealthy opinions and behaviors around what it is to be a man

[@shastahasta4563]

Powerful reminder for leaders. Safety talks shouldn't just be about physical well-being; mental health is equally vital.

[@geraldemery1417]

Unfortunately not many people who set the rules think that way.

[@bobbywie]

I think so too, just because you can't the detrimental impact a job is having doesn't mean it isn't there

[@TooChatForYou]

My husband has worked in retail for as long as I've known him and the other day he said something really interesting about how as a manager he needs to be so many things all at once, and one of the things he listed was counsellor. I was so struck by it because yea he's a compassionate person but he's not qualified for that!! It just made me think how many people are struggling in workplaces and turning to the wrong people for help and support. From the sounds of things this is an industry where those in management might not even be willing to lend an empathetic ear.

[@ElisendaPliego]

This makes me think of Ron, thanks for sending

[@DeriviaGraham]

I know why you found this and shared it, bless you.

[@MelahHolland]

Corporations don't spend the money needed to keep their employees safe

[@RaquelFontirroig]

I know so many people in HR that arent able to do the job because they have enough training.

[@CynthisDorsey]

Love you shared this on our group.

[@AngelInfinity]

This is really interesting... I did an object design course and half of it was in a proper workshop, there was soooo much OHS we had to go through before using _anything_ - wouldn't it be amazing if there was something like that for mental health?

[@sadfacesforall]

Ohhh that would be amazing! I wonder why this isn't a thing already??