Learned Helplessness - How you're unconsciously destroying your life

[@eliprenten7066]

"Isolate the situation" That's a simple piece of advice I needed

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Thank you for taking the time to comment Eli. Happy you found something out from the video.

[@LucasAPC06]

I've made the opposite step… I used to be optimistic with everything, I were confident and all the other stuff. Whatever the failures, I used to forget it or not blaming myself. Including grades, friendship problems, and many things in my life. But there was a phase of my life that I've "realized" that it was my fault somehow (even if it might not be true, the problem is that I don't actually know). That was just the first part. I started by blaming myself for many things, I stopped being that confident and I'm always undecided about my actions which lead me to do nothing. Nowadays I get completely unmotivated, I started by thinking that most things I could do are/were either worthless or not the best choice and I became worse each day. And sometimes I think that there's no way back, even when I know that might not be the truth. The most awful part on these situations (generally, not only myself) is that most of these people can't change their life to this optimistic mindset without any external help (friend, family, professional help), and that external help is either helpless or doesn't even know about the situation to help. Fortunately, I could realize that I'm in this kind of situation, but I don't see me making any progress to make it out. But thx anyway for the video. (Sorry for bad English)

[@FabulousJewishKitty911]

wow that's the same as me

[@ashishsachdeva1160]

My therapist told me to do an exercise: "for a negative thought, try to find a positive response (and try to be creative here, no same answer). So next time a negative thought comes, try an equivalent positive thought to it. :)

[@apxprdtr_mge]

Your videos, though they are amazing and full of useful content, send me into sheer panic, seeing just how many bad habits I have right now. But it's a work in progress. Thanks for sharing man.

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

You got this!

[@SM-gl7sb]

i suggest "The Confident Mind: A Battle-Tested Guide to Unshakable Performance" by Dr. Nate Zinsser as a reading, it's full of real life examples of his methods and "rituals", that are aligned with this video. It's so sad that we are taught to crush our confidence so early and dismiss self-belief as humans were perfect, logical, totally not influenced and absolutely in control of their thoughts lol

[@TheThora17]

The best video I’ve seen in the subject! Thank you!

[@satnamatri1597]

Dear buddy you are like an angel for me today, I really needed this kind of support .....thank you so much brother......❤ I will try my level best to inculcate this in each and every vein of my body and mind.

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Hey Satnam, I'm really glad we can help. Hope you are doing well.

[@abinvarkey2331]

awesome...changing the wrong belief (a.k.a changing the way you see at things and situations ) is key!

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Thanks for watching Abin

[@shaggy4667]

I need to keep this buried in my brain, thank you for what you do 💜

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

You are so welcome. Glad it can help

[@jaygelsomino5680]

What real learning looks like.

[@jayjain1033]

Wow, thank you. It felt like you were personally talking to me, I suffer from this problem alot due to low self esteem.

[@CooperTSmith-s6j]

what real learning looks like

[@olivethereindeer6148]

It's interesting I found this video today. I'm working on my thesis in grad school for psychology and I want to write on depression. I want to write on learned Hlhelplessness and cognitive theory to explain it but my professors keep fighting me on it for some reason. I received the ok to write on cognitive theory but not learned helplessness. Your video thoroughly explains a lot about it. I also never knew what learned optimism was until now.

[@mozumo7u]

Great video. Do you mind telling me what software did you use to make idle action for your characters like in 3:05 (and all over other places too). I mean like they're just gently swaying back and forth. Did you manually animate them or is there any plugin or some software that could achieve this? I am currently learning animation. Thanks for sharing!

[@shaggy4667]

To summarize for myself, 1) Permanence - causes for bad events are temporary and not permanent, hence they can be overcomed 2) Pervasiveness - failure in one life area must not be generalized to the life as a whole, but isolated to that area. Whereas success in one area can and should influence life as a whole 3) Personalization - Instead of blaming everything on yourself, realize when causes for failures are out of your control. Plus, causes for success are in all likelihood always due to your performance.

[@marcellofunhouse1234]

i learned it back in middle school when like i said i was bullied no one was doing anything about it i was skipping lunch and crying at one of the lunch desks alone no one cared so i just gave up

[@이승민-x7l]

just got bad news on job interview. this video helped me to carry on to next one. thanks.

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

In the right moment! :))

[@AlexDiesTrying]

Solution: You train learned optimism with willpower that you no longer posses and outside help that you no longer have the tenacity to find among the sea of clueless friends or indifferent charlatans while you're destroying your health. Problem solved. Yay for textbook solutions from people who never had the problem.

[@evrion3106]

Thank you for making these great videos.

[@applebottomjeans7]

Needed this today! Thanks :)

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Glad you found it useful Robin

[@bravosemtex6727]

What about both, i feel like i am optimistically pessimistic.

[@ChucksCherubs3]

I came here looking for answers because I suspect I have symptoms of Learned Helplessness. However, as both a dog lover and someone who suffers from depression, this video just made me feel worse. Now I'm depressed thinking about the terrible experiments done on dogs in the name of science. 😥

[@yusrailyas]

I don't know what to say except thank you for this. I love this video ❣

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Glad it helped you Yusra

[@lamserwang2175]

My exams are coming and this was very helpful ❤️

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

I'm so glad!

[@MrCrocodile12]

Thank you for this great video. It is very motivating and helps a lot. Greetings from Germany, you are a great guy!

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Glad it was helpful MrCrocodile. :))

[@Anonymous-wv9zv]

man, I'm full of shit in my life. How do I overcome my laziness and start grinding?? I remember I used to have goals and ambitions. but right now I don't wanna do shit man.

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Maybe you're overstimulating your dopamine reward pathways, maybe you should take a look into that - I sense that could be a problem in your situation.

[@nicknorizadeh4336]

Great and easily digestible video!

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Glad you liked it!

[@gunnerz8466]

Great video! Continue with the work 💪 Greetings from Germany 🇩🇪

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Thank you Shapshalovski. Is your picture from mount Everest?

[@retroclassicsgarage]

Thank you

[@SUZAKU__007]

Today i came across this video and feel like i am a victim of it thanks for letting me know about this.

[@joeydurocher5450]

NOBBEL?!?!?! OMG I JUST RECOGNIZED YOUR VOICE YAY

[@foryoutofindout2965]

This is excatly happening to me continuesly failure to my exam i didnt know that its called learned helplessness... im currently suffering this right now 😢😢😢 hopeless and feel stupid

[@kennydolby1379]

You need to regain the feeling of agency. Start with something small - doesnt have to be related to thing that you failed - like waking up earlier, start exercising... and so and so. The point is you doing something hard, but not to hard, and then you gradually increase the difficulty level. Once you feel in control enough, you focus on the thing that you failed.

[@mor9n243]

I would expect any good thing to leave me in life Health, relationships, money it does overtake your thinking

[@seanloh860]

Cool ideas

[@shivaniGautam-ux5ur]

Sounds like lack of courage to try again bcz of the fear of failing

[@kennydolby1379]

It makes sense on a biological level. You try doing X 10 times, you failed, so your subconscious stops giving you energy, cos its a wasted energy. The problem is that it causes you to be depressed, but what you really should do, is find another goal.

[@MaxContagion]

optimist "the glass is half full". pessimist "the glass is half empty". maker "cut the glass in half. now its full". server "refill the glass". how you see the world is important. not nearly as important is making it a better place

[@walterbrownstone8017]

For example a police officer uses his citation book to subtract from innocent people's lives. Why? Because he is helpless. He needs a job. So better to subtract from people's and feel a little bit guilty than resign from a 200k job based on moral grounds. Domino effect, police subtract from regular people, regular people subtract from each other, and a completely broken society emerges. Meanwhile, in other countries, the think past this problem.

[@divyamadhubala7102]

Thank you for making this video. I'm depressed and I'm crying. i didn't know what to do. Your video gave me some guidance. I will make sure to practice the 3Ps in my life from now.

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Take care Divya! Trust me, everything will get back to normal soon.

[@divyamadhubala7102]

@@ProjectBetterSelf Thank you 🙏🏼 so much 😊 I'm also going to read this book.

[@blissjoy687]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@marshallthomas2239]

So dogs, elephants, and people can learn helplessness by experiencing ACTUAL helplessness. The solution for dogs is outside help imposed, but the solution for people is inner help willed? That kinda misses the point, no?

[@Kitchenlabofficial]

nice

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Thanks

[@CrazyMagnificent]

Oh man, how I let self-pity define my life. But it’s not too late yet to so something about it. Oh and you really don’t need subtitles mate.

[@butterfly2604]

Get away from all toxic people friends family neighbors coworkers etc that are always downers and negtive and complaining.Stop catastrophizing... and most importantly join animals rights groups to stop abusing innocent animals 😢 😢😢😢😢

[@kool4209]

so optimists people are delusional

[@PrussianBlu3]

It didn't help.

[@susiequinn4042]

😂😂

[@rawcoustic1718]

Same

[@alvaradoac21]

This doesn’t help. I am optimistic constantly because of the inherent joy of life. But there are still addictions and behaviors I can’t change, despite my attempts. I’ve already “isolated” the problem, but to no avail. This is terrible advice.

[@danielmartarano7251]

One piece of advice…. Ask yourself: Is there.anyone in this world less intelligent than me who has overcome a similar addiction or behavior? Then learn all you can about strategies that they used to see if it resonates in your life. You might need a 3rd party to help you see your behaviors in different ways and to discover what environmental factors are impacting progress.

[@pyrifranco]

my mind is so shit this isn't gonna help

[@ProjectBetterSelf]

Why is that Francoi?

[@DominionMovementDotOrg]

i cant stand that vivisectionists tortured all those dogs. vivisection needs to end