9/11 Stories: FDNY 9/11 Widow Tina Bilcher Murphy

Tina Bilcher Murphy says the last time she spoke with her New York City firefighter husband was September 10th, when he called, asking if it was ok with her if he worked a second shift. 26 year old Tina and Brian had just welcomed their first child, a son, Grant, 13 days before. September 10th was Brian’s first day back at work with the FDNY after the birth. Their last words to each other: “I love you”.
Tina awakened early on 9/11 to a hungry baby awaiting his first morning breastfeeding. She turned on the tv. That’s when she learned about the plane hitting The World Trade Center. Tina knew she wouldn’t be hearing from Brian. He had a job to do. Tina continued with her plans that day, driving Grant to his first appointment with the pediatrician. She couldn’t understand why the nurse said, “What are you doing here??”. Tina was unaware the towers had fallen. It was only when she returned home that she learned the full story. Still, Tina didn’t give up hope. She says it must have been a mother’s instinct . She had to be a mom. And she couldn’t do that if she accepted that Brian was gone. For six months, Tina believed Brian would come home. In June, on their wedding anniversary, she finally held a memorial service for her 38 year old husband. It was an empty casket. Like 40% of those killed in New York City that day, Brian Bilcher’s remains were never found.
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[@tiffanygaeta8133]

These stories are so important and so incredible to the human strength of persevering such trauma. What an amazing woman. Thank you for sharing your experience.

[@robbieogle8622]

What a hero. I dated a fireman. They literally have something in them that is very heroic. No fear at all. You picked a good man to have a child with.

[@deyannaf4380]

Newborn baby watching that on tv. So freakin terrible. I really could not even imagine. God bless you, your son and your family. Prayers for you all.

[@v.dargain1678]

Same ! That's awful . If telling others about it on TV is therapeutic for her , then more power to her .

[@MVuke84]

There's not a whole lot of people that can call their father, or husband, a real life hero. Ever since that day, I truly learned the risk firefighters take everyday to help complete strangers. We are thankful for your family, and prayers are with you.

[@CSarge]

I was always seeking stories about 9/11 and I always wondered why there weren’t many. This is the best thing you could’ve done to make sure the younger generations NEVER FORGET. I believe people have forgotten.

[@sandrametcalfe7483]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Try not to blame yourself. You’re an amazing woman who is very brave. May God bless you and your family.

[@mtio2807]

She doesn’t

[@GetonMylevel132]

@@mtio2807 📞🤡

[@thenanlife1141]

Amazing lady god bless her . No one can comprehend this unbearable grief she had to go through xx

[@dianemitchell1717]

You are so lucky to have a supportive husband who understands your pain bc of his own pain. Bless you and your extended family. You give hope to others with your loving nature.

[@mtio2807]

They’re both broken

[@joeybrazil2024]

​@@mtio2807Aren't we all? Or will be, at some point.

[@kristinecrowley8321]

The strength of these young wives/moms absolutely blows my mind. I know a loss of any kind is awful but something about the idea of these young women who were just starting their families, to suddenly lose their husband and the father of their children and also lose the life they imagined for their families..it’s overwhelming. I know they had no choice but to move forward but they all seemed to have done so with amazing courage and commitment to raising their children to be good human beings. So heartbreaking and unfair.

[@susanhenshaw622]

Thank you for sharing your story. 2001 is now 20 years ago but it probably seems like yesterday. I can’t imagine all you’ve been through. My heart still aches for all families like your changed forever.🙏💕🇨🇦

[@mikestevens7018]

I'm so sorry,such a tragedy.But you're son's Daddy will always be his hero and they'll meet again one day .

[@yendang5403]

WOW, she has such a positive outlook on life considering what she went through. I didn't know anyone personally who lost their lives during 911, but I still feel so ANGRY!!!! Listening to her and how positive she comes across help me see the positive side of tragedy.

[@loriadams7724]

This sweet woman, i pray that her heart is comforted, so that she can be healed from so much trauma.

[@stopanimalcruelty298]

My son was 6 days old . I thought what world am I bringing this beautiful boy in to . So sorry for your loss 💜

[@lm13981]

You’re an inspiration, I am amazed by your strength. He will always be with you, thoughts and prayers. Thank you for sharing your story.

[@mtio2807]

Yes, she inspires us to find a new man asap

[@GetonMylevel132]

@@mtio2807 = cuckoo for cocoa puffs

[@MurrayJoe]

@@mtio2807 🤡

[@KarmasAbutch]

@@mtio2807WTF?

[@shatimbeecat1960]

My heart breaks for this beautiful wife and mother, so glad she keeps him alive every day for the hero he was and her family does too… Never forget🙏🙏🙏

[@samanthah9849]

God bless you and your family, Tina! Your husband is a hero!

[@Mizzlenum]

I come back to hear these stories because it helps me to get courage when things are not going well. I've seen sooo mant of them and each one is unique and special. Thank you for sharing our stories, I'm sure there's thouusands more that we haven't heard.

[@mrlaw711]

Tina is an incredible woman. Tough and I'm sure she raised her son, Grant, right. Thank you for sharing your story. Grief is always "love" with no place to go.

[@photogher]

I lost my dad over a decade ago, and I still talk to him occasionally. I choose to believe he can hear me and can give me inspiration and stay connected. And if he can't, and there's nothing after this life, and I'm just crazy, well so be it. Either way, it's fine, I'm fine.

[@StudioEq_777]

Thank you for sharing your story, my sincere regrets for your loss and pain. I admire your great strength and wisdom. As you say, there is a beginning and a middle. Your accumulated strength of the past 20 years, has illuminated your humanity an shows as the infinite possibilities of space in the middle, where there seems to be no space. Thanks again for sharing your story and your strength. 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🙏❤

[@darlenemurphy5351]

So wonderful that you are able to have that blended family. God Bless You.

[@paulabrown6840]

Thank you so much for telling your story. I’m watching this on September 10 2021. You and your son are in my heart 💜. May your first husband and your current husbands first child rest in loving peace.

[@nomopms1]

Anytime someone dies unexpectedly, it's gut-wrenching. The pain lasts for a long time. You go on with your life, but, in your heart, you drag that grief with you until you decide to let it go. I think the younger you are when it happens, the harder it is. Speaking from life experience. God bless everyone who's gone through it. There really does come a time down the road when you can think of that person and just be at peace.

[@lorinorton3971]

Thank you for your heartfelt, personal story. My heart is with you.

[@grammyb5216]

I agree with you and I understand that, God Intervention. That is perfect. I’m so so sorry for your enormous loss, your sons loss. That he died a hero is so special but it doesn’t keep you from missing him so much. I’m praying for you guys in Texas 😢🙏🤠

[@pastelskies8466]

It's Tina that's extraordinary. Not just for the life altering tragedy she's endured but for WHO she is.

[@taffycat5049]

The emotion after all of these years is so sad. It's like it all just happened yesterday. 💗🙏💗🙏

[@keith2092]

These firemens' wives are the epitome of courage. Admirable, tough and smart and they know the job. Any one of the wives I have heard here could have served pretty well in a company, engine or ladder.

[@anamiriamrodriguezcruz3824]

RIP Innocent Firefighters, NYC Police, Port Authory; Twin Tower Coworkers. :(

[@bbear1971]

Very brave woman. She might not think that, but she is. It will be 30yrs this year i lost my father in a plane crash. And i still dont know how to heal from it. Im still in the mad phase of it.

[@floretta65]

I am sorry for your loss and your pain.... To get some perspectives on life and death you can check ( as a starting point) the youtube channel of Suzanne Giesemann, an extraordinary wise woman.... Also people who had NDEs ( plenty of videos!) can give you a bit of inspiration to heal your trauma.... Hope this helps....

[@gary1961]

Wow. This is really powerful. Her testimony brought me to tears.

[@danielleybelly8039]

So sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story. hugs to you

[@juliamarin4896]

I think your psyche just wanted to protect you so it let you realize the truth when you could actually handle the truth. I'm sorry for your loss. You are so blessed to have your two beautiful sons and your nephew!! I think you learn how to carry them with you once they're gone...that's what I do each day too. He'll always be a part of your life and frankly I'm certain that the two of you wouldn't have it any other way. It's beautiful in it's own way... And, your husband died a Hero.

[@braveheartrv2946]

I love this series. I hope yall keep going. Get all the stories you can so we never forget. Our childrens childrens children will know...

[@melissahedden5396]

Such a heartbreaking story. The survivors in these stories have a strength and courage that I don’t think I would ever be able to summon in the face of such an event. Bless them and their families. I am inspired that positive outcomes are possible from such a dark day. And thank you to each of them for sharing their stories.

[@evelynmahoney3569]

In a way, her belief was accurate and her faith was not misplaced. Her husband did come home . . . by way of her son . . . who evolved to smell just like him, laugh & eat just like him. God is good.

[@laravonstaden1838]

What a wonderful lady with a wonderful family. The power of love is strong indeed. God bless them all.

[@leesher1845]

The pain is so heavy at the firehouse… 😔

[@1f5sda]

Agreed! 😢😢😢😢

[@donnalromero4481]

To Live in the Heart's we leave behind is not to die. She's been so Strong and has kept him So real and so Alive in Our memory Brian Bilcher.

[@WhosoeverBelieveth]

💎 You're such a gem, Tina. Thank you for making this world a better place. Jesus loves you immeasurably. 🌏🙏🕛

[@traditionalgirl5585]

I can feel the weight of your pain in my heart through your words. I pray God comforts you and your family always and extra.

[@brownlauren15]

Tina, bring it in, cope, persevere... Thanks for sharing your story🙏

[@Ellamar23]

Your strength, your love, your courage are an inspiration. God bless you and your family.

[@diannbrown528]

Thank you for sharing

[@raineyj560]

Such a moving situation because as long as the victims have a legacy, to me its a continuing situation. So happy that she continues to stay close to her late husband's family. God bless her children, may they continue to thrive.

[@theathenachannel88]

❤God bless you Tina Bilcher Murphy ❤

[@dcnole]

Bless you.

[@stephenn8366]

I hope you have found peace.

[@K1OIK]

obviously not.

[@NJBeachlover1]

God bless you… Please don’t blame yourself… He is looking down on you and wouldn’t want to see you broken.

[@hockleyglen]

There is a reason the rear view mirror is so small and the windshield is so big. I appreciate your pain but your future is standing there beside you.

[@collegeri]

Life is precious.. thanks for sharing your story.

[@jackhanna4447]

God. This is so sad, yet somehow inspiring.

[@stephenchristian9800]

Hi I'm Steve from Australia, my heart goes out to you and your son, My Prayers go out to you in your grief, Much Love

[@maryloulordi8424]

God bless you ❤

[@aimee1860]

God bless you!

[@JSJSpeaks]

Coping is forever. I love that. 💜✨

[@Mr118blackie]

Thank you thank you thank for sharing these stories with us it means a lot So many lives touched ❤️

[@visionquest414]

i rarely can sit in listen to people just talk on youtube. Doesnt matter the tragedy. I found myself listening to the entire thing.

[@lmccism]

Thankyou for your beautiful, life affirming words.

[@lizzypop2628]

I don’t blame her at ALL for holding onto that hope. It’s admirable actually whether or not it was a coping mechanism

[@qtgonewild]

what a great woman.

[@evelyncarbonell1]

we are left here for a purpose when you lose a loved one

[@Lacigirl123]

You are the definition of STRENGTH! Thank you for sharing! 💕💕💕

[@hizgrase]

What a strong lovely lady.

[@redruby747]

Poor lady bless her

[@karenweaver7574]

Thank you for sharing your story. Bless you and your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[@RANDY4410]

God bless her she is a strong lady.

[@janicestephenson4977]

God Bless you love !

[@RainAprilDiamond]

So heart breaking 💔 😢 and sad.

[@Irishgirl7]

My god fair doos to you. You are so strong your husband would be very proud.

[@Rodmic-hd9pn]

I am so sorry for you and thank you for sharing your story. I think your one of the strongest people I know

[@victoriablue665]

Tina, you are always in my heart....

[@bulldog8489]

Thank You for sharing Tina...All of You who lost Close Ones on that day have carried a heavier burden than the rest of us Americans. Thank You for sharing so that They and You, the survivors, will not be forgotten. This 911 Stories series is just a great cause and gift. Thank God !

[@geriroberts001]

May The Lord bless you and your family. You are courageous and strong. 💜🙏🇦🇺

[@AM-qr4ys]

This was so heartbreaking. 😢but she spoke so beautifully! Maybe god bless you and your family. I’m so sorry for your loss

[@glendaharris7219]

Wow..13 day old baby...you are a good momma. Thank you for your testimony... Thank you to your husband, for his sacrifice. God bless you. I too am sorry for your loss.

[@daniellemarie6059]

God bless you 🙏🏻❤️ stay strong. I am so sorry that you had to go through this🙏🏻 I admire your strength and bravery so much. You were only 27 when this happened and a new mom I am 28 right now I can’t even imagine 💔

[@patriciarouse2801]

Love is forever. Love is real and not fade away. Our nervous systems are designed to love. God 🙏 you

[@LubaB]

Thank you for telling your story in English. ❤

[@barbettef.6537]

I pray you an abundance of peace and love.

[@gulfbaby230]

You are so strong and brave and incredibly special for keeping your blended family together and keeping your husband’s spirit alive for your son and your mother-in-law. I’m so sorry for your loss, and the world is so grateful for your husbands service. May he Rest In Peace.

[@kathleengolden757]

God bless you all! Keep on talking to him! He is still there in spirit and one day you will all be together again in heaven! What incredible strength you have. To have to go through this at 27, it’s unbelievable!

[@theislander2493]

Hang in there hunny 🌹God bless you

[@excaliburjohndeere7657]

I’ll think about you for a long time. If you get a chance. Watch the video about the pilot in Gander Newfoundland.September 11, 2001. People of Newfoundland took care of 7000 people on jets for five days. Lots of good people. 38 jet’s set there for five days. We’re not alone.

[@ellabella6099]

Those stories warmed my heart ❤️ about what the Gander people did for what they called the “plane people “ .

[@effentjes]

Beautiful

[@3131raymond]

Tina my heart ♥ breaks for you

[@mtio2807]

Happy belated birthday

[@allysonh6410]

My God i Feel your pain honey. I cannot even imagine. A love like yours was with your husband is incredibly rare now days. You are incredibly strong. THANK YOU for sharing your pain. We Need to hear it. God Bless you and yours. And why was that girl's pain different than yours?? You both had firefighters. huh 🤔🤷‍♀️

[@Sweetie_PieLo]

The interviews of the women are so much deeper than that of the men

[@Rodmic-hd9pn]

Has anyone ever told you to get over it

[@1f5sda]

I am sorry for her loss! I have always had (and always will) the utmost respect for our firefighters and their loved ones.

[@ednabarela485]

TINA BILCHER MURPHY you are a beautiful strong woman I pray Our BlESSED FATHERED wraps you and your family in his loving arms your precious husband is your angel on earth look for the signs with a open heart and mind I wish you Peace and Love 🙏🙏🙏🌹🌹🌹

[@xino_z]

She really resonated with me. She's right

[@marblehead3398]

💜

[@SinisterScoundrel6562]

I think she's gonna be ok.

[@pyrokuda9743]

Such a sweet gal. :(

[@greeneyejuana6570]

🙏

[@Johnny-ip4mk]

❤

[@Rodmic-hd9pn]

Did any widows get remarried to fireman