Quagmire S3E22 - The X-Files Revisited

Today we have a fun light episode and the conclusion to the quee-logy with Quagmire, episode 22 of season 3.

[@lfsantacruz8703]

RIP Queequeg. You deserved better. 😔 In the arms of the angels... far awaaaaaaaaay from heeeere... 😭🙌

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha poor Quee...

[@GimbalosMorkinar]

This was the one I re-watched a bunch as a kid.

[@JBSpookyReview]

It's a fun episode to watch when you're young.

[@Nooschwander]

I've been waiting for the finale of the Quee-leogy!

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha I hope you enjoyed it.

[@yourstreetserenade]

This episode was one of my favorites and I revisit it often. Sometimes I wish we had some way to calculate our play counts of certain episodes. I've easily seen this one 30+ times since the late 90s. Its just fun and low stakes, even if we do unfortunately lose queequeg. The conversation on the rock is definitely the highlight for me. I never noticed Darin had a hand in this one but looking at it now I can for sure feel his vibe all throughout. Great recap yet again!

[@JBSpookyReview]

Yeah this is one I've seen countless times. I've gone through the series maybe 6 or 7 times, but have seen individual episodes countless times.

[@kismit6724]

One of my favorite episodes from season 3!

[@JBSpookyReview]

It's a ton of fun.

[@jojotheswede8444]

"I've seen more frogs than aliens" That says a lot all things considered. Oh, and dog.

[@JBSpookyReview]

There might be more episodes in the series with frogs than aliens.

[@MRGRIMZ89]

@@JBSpookyReview IKR!! LOL

[@annaboo27]

I can’t thank you enough for the precious Quee interlude. Quee shall forever be with us as best boy/ samurai warrior!! I’ve seen this episode once and haven’t been able to watch it again…until you made it right.💔

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know it's sad when he goes, but I had to do something haha.

[@vuetoob3983]

Been waiting on this one. Its my #1 favorite episode of the X-Files 😊😊😊

[@JBSpookyReview]

I hope I did it justice.

[@calwildboy]

I love episodes when they take place in the woods. U can smell the fresh BC air lol love the video eh 🇨🇦

[@JBSpookyReview]

Yeah the show loses something when it moves to LA.

[@MRGRIMZ89]

@@JBSpookyReview I HATE TO ADMIT IT, BUT YOU'RE 100% RIGHT.

[@MRGRIMZ89]

R.I.P. QUEEQUEG!.....

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know poor Quee...

[@victorpratt9920]

I really need to get the box set so when the apocalypse hits I can fire up the generator and relive all these moments!

[@JBSpookyReview]

It's pretty pricey now.

[@BreadApologist]

Ah always nice to see an upload from this channel. Especially when you have a 2 week long headache and wait on a dr appointment wondering if you might be dying. I wish that was a joke. No cap though (that’s what the kids say now isn’t it) always enjoy vids from this guy.. Definitely make life more enjoyable

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know all about bad migraines. I don't get them often, but when I do they completely take me out.

[@BlogDoppiaggiItalioti]

"I've seen more amphibians than aliens" is a great line and a great truth 😄

[@JBSpookyReview]

For a show about Aliens, it sure has a lot of frogs and toads.

[@Yesica1993]

Thank you for giving me closure after all these years! This will be my head canon forever. :) Trufax: I named one of my hamsters Queequeg. Hand raised by my friend's boyfriend, he was just as adorable as his namesake.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha I had planned on doing something silly for queequeg from the day I started these little videos. Queequeg is a good name for a hamster. They're pretty cute.

[@MRGRIMZ89]

ONE OF MY TOP 3 FAVORITES!!! DOPE VIDEO BRO, THANKS.

[@JBSpookyReview]

I'm just glad you enjoyed it.

[@rudejase]

Been binge watching this channel for a while now and it's a llittle worrying.. I've almost ran out of videos 🤣

[@JBSpookyReview]

I'll have to get them out faster.

[@pfoutsmn]

Glad to hear quee made it. Really helps me sleep at night.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Oh yeah he's fine. Just doing his own thing.

[@jerrydimattia4647]

Love that you clocked the Crystal Lake signage!!

[@JBSpookyReview]

when I saw that scene I thought it looked familiar. So I scanned Jason Lives and I was right. They must have used stock footage or something because both were shot in different locations.

[@Bonez0r]

6:14 I love how dedicated this guy is to his hobby. He could have run away and saved his life, but instead he is determined to snap some pictures of the monster that's seconds away from eating him.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha right? He's more interested in fumbling with his camera than getting away.

[@Belzediel]

After Stubb gets it into Ahab's head that the crew aren't going to keep being happy with skipping over pods, they go out and finally pop a spermy. After rigging the ship for processing, night falls, and they can't bring the bull aboard, so, they tie it alongside the ship. Trouble with having a forty ton blubbery mass of meat tied to the side of your ship overnight* is that it's a bit bloody, so, they're going to need to do something about the sharks. What they do, and by all accounts this was standard practice, is give the harpooners flensing shovels. These are large flat blades on long handles, and they're usually used to make long slices through whale skin so that they can make chunks to put in the boiling vats. Anyhoo, the harpooners are then tied to the ship and lowered down so they're standing on the dead whale. Their job for the entire night is to go running over to any shark that goes to take a bite and stab them in the face with the shovels. The flensing shovels have long handles, but not limitless ones, so, most of the time, to get to a shark's pointy, smug face, they're waist deep in the ice cold waters of the Atlantic. Their job is to attack large, hungry sharks, at night, in waist deep blood soaked water, with a sharp spoon, whilst standing on a greased, smooth surface. This is treated as a nuisance job, it's mostly a pain in the neck they can't go to bed. The ship's cook, Fleece, appears at one point, drunk as a skunk, in part because there's nothing for him to do, having been convinced by Stubb that someone ought to be giving the sharks last rites. One of the harpooners is, of course, Queequeg, the south sea islander we first see trying to sell off a bunch of shrunken heads. I fricken' love Moby Dick. To all intents and porpoises, this episode is remade into Lake Placid, a film I am very fond of, mainly because it's one of very few films to be a tongue in cheek comedy from the cousins across the pond. Might be a european thing but I'm never going to understand how some treat LP as a serious film. Just like it's spiritual successor, Deep Blue Sea. Which of course, revolves around a big blue thing, like the episode. Life is only circles, and things in those circles, beneath the calm surface a world of gliding monsters, around a whale, like in Mobius Dickus, who is very large, a Biggus Dickus, if you will, who lives in Rome, with his wife, Incontinentia Buckets. There is a long and circular argument about whether the sperm after which the whale is named and the other kind are named which for onesize, and one of the glorious things about MB is that, no, they named the oil and the fish (according to Ahab) after the, um, Eau du Homme, which makes a lot of the dialogue in MB very funny. Melville is aware of this, but one thing Melville's not top on is humour, but if he wasn't smirking the whole way through writing about the delightful pleasures of whalers breaking up the wads of sperm in the barrels below in the bilge, then I am a Dutchman. A Flying Dutchman, perhaps, a sailing vessel, ploughing the seas, full of circling sharks. *Aside from the fact that this causes a prominent roll to port meaning all the hammocks have to be retied and the ship's oven needs to be doused so the whole crew's on cold biscuits, including Ahab. I mean you cannot pretend that a film where a man holds aloft a severed toe and asks 'Is this your missing man?' and the reply from the Sherrif is 'I don't know, he seemed taller.' is not a comedy.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Is that whaling job real? No way in hell I'm doing that.

[@Belzediel]

@@JBSpookyReview The shark thing? Yep, that happened. Not too often, it has to be said, because they really tried to avoid bringing the boats back that late in the day, for many reason, but a whale's a whale. How Mister Fleece gets his new apron is a tale told in hushed tones in darkened corners...

[@astrosquirrel5038]

This is the first episode I remember seeing. Still a great one!

[@JBSpookyReview]

It's a great episode to get started with.

[@BennysBenz]

The line should be I did as a kid then I grew up and became a MEDICAL DOCTOR. Yes Ted's hat us awesome.

[@JBSpookyReview]

If she had said Medical Doctor it would have been lit.

[@t0er3793]

Thank you for the video! So happy you're doing this series been my favorite to watch this year. Happy xfiles is 11 seasons long lol!

[@JBSpookyReview]

Yeah we've got a long way to go still.

[@t0er3793]

​@@JBSpookyReviewI'll be watching! Are you going to do the movies?

[@marienbad2]

I love that you both love the show and also mock it when it's dumb with some funny line.

[@JBSpookyReview]

I mock it out of my love for it. I just like to have fun with it.

[@mathildeglaser8421]

hilarious 😂 thank you… I really liked that one, Poor Queequeg 😢 …

[@JBSpookyReview]

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[@vuetoob3983]

Dr. Faraday had a big role in Loudermilk

[@JBSpookyReview]

I can honestly say I have never heard of that. But thank you for letting me know.

[@vuetoob3983]

@@JBSpookyReview it's a great show - if you like Office Space or dry sarcastic humor. It's in Prime or Netflix. Worth a watch

[@xeepers]

Now that's what I call a sticky situation

[@JBSpookyReview]

Sticky and Scaley.

[@WyomingGuy876]

".... ask your grandparents." How Dare you sir! Muskets at Dawn!

[@joanmayer304]

Lol. Feel the same. Not sure of his demographics but the shows being reviewed are decades old. Don’t know how many kids are watching X-Files and Twilight Zone retrospectives?

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha the demographics are between 35-55 so all of my viewers should know what a beeper is. But still, there is always someone new to the show.

[@ODSTJake]

One episode I can't to see you cover, though it's way in the future of season 5 is The-Post-Modern Prometheus. I thought it was a funny surprisingly heartfelt and jolly old time. Reminded me of Humbug. Excited to hear your thoughts on it!

[@JBSpookyReview]

That's one of my favorite episodes.

[@ODSTJake]

Nice! Going through the whole series for the first time myself. I got to season 4 years ago when x files was on Netflix but it got taken off. So restarted watching on Hulu a month ago. On season 5 episode 11! Having fun with it

[@nunyabizness6595]

Giggity giggity! Alright....hey somebody had to say it.😂😂😂😮

[@JBSpookyReview]

Hahah I figured someone would.

[@viriathas9910]

This was a fun episode to be sure. I like the exploration of "Loch Ness" type creatures, since we had gotten some solid cryptids already. I saw this episode when it aired, and then a few years later the movie Lake Placid came out and I was 99% sure the movie took its plot from this X Files episode.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Yeah Lake Placid pretty much is a ripoff. Fun, but a ripoff haha.

[@calicatsmom3747]

Scully isn't dressed like Beetlejuice. She's dressed like Jack Skellington

[@JBSpookyReview]

ohhh even better. This is why I'm glad my viewers are smarter than I.

[@muldrake]

Haven't watched this episode in a while, was it really just that one alligator all the time? I guess they left it open? Anyway thanks for those videos, i hope you really do the whole series!

[@JBSpookyReview]

It could have been big blue as well, we never actually saw the attacks happen. I plan on doing the whole the series, the movies and the comics.

[@muldrake]

@@JBSpookyReview nice, i never actually read the comics but i heard they have a better story than the revival!

[@MRGRIMZ89]

5:10 GOOD TO SEE JIMMY ENJOYING HIS OFF TIME FROM SEAN. ;)

[@JBSpookyReview]

He needs to be his own man.

[@jamesvozar1]

Scully was gigity in this episode man. haha

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha she's cute.

[@richardhellawell4596]

I think in season 3 after all the tragedy Mulder and Scully are just enjoying there cases together. in my opinion they are the happiest they ever will ever be before the darkness of season 4

[@JBSpookyReview]

agreed.

[@austinlee4156]

Poor pupper

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know aww.

[@stevedenis8292]

Spookie funny episode. If only we could have had a Gravity falls X-Files crossover. For and episode named Quagmire nothing Giggity took place . Ok it was way before Family guy.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha way before family guy.

[@schulzbrianr]

This is a really basic episode (in a good way), it feels almost like it belongs on the first season, a great introduction for someone if they ask "what is the X Files like?" because it really has all the elements of the basic show stereotypes/tropes.

[@JBSpookyReview]

You're right, it's definitely a good episode to introduce someone to the show with.

[@ijf817]

No Cryptidz Aloud!

[@JBSpookyReview]

I em Smrt

[@AtticussAtticuss]

Spooky Nessy.

[@JBSpookyReview]

Pretty damn spooky.

[@MRGRIMZ89]

THREE'S A CROWD LOL

[@JBSpookyReview]

and it never ends well.

[@Maggpai]

Toads and frogs are the same thing - dont let big brother tell you otherwise:D

[@JBSpookyReview]

I think they're drones sent out by big brother to watch us.

[@mavromatis]

That alligator probably have a freezer in the deep side where she puts all that "food". Also how long you are going to close a lake? Until the "monster" surrenders due to hunger?

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha we're not opening this lake until we find this prehistoric dinosaur.

[@KrystalloMantis]

As the angry Nintendo nerd said riding a nes in your SNES. I wouldn't know that game gave me a seizure. RIP Quee

[@JBSpookyReview]

hahaha RIP Quee

[@donovanbradford8231]

It's a pitty this episode came out when it did because just a few years later we would have a true X-Files type film pop up in Lake Placid which might have kent itself better to this episode. Because while I get the fake of it's a gator not Nessy a gator also makes no sense for the amount of attacks and utter strength drag full grown men several feet into the water and eating half to nearly all of them. Not to mention in in the mid 2000's Monster Quest would capture very convincing video of an American Croc that was estimated to be 16ft long a record in size. So having the attacking animal even being a croc that is over 12 ft would give Scully a chance to say to Mulder while it wasn't Big Blue that croc is bigger than anything ever found in the U.S. Mulder. Plus I wouldn't have killed the fluffy dogo as I'm never about that even for effect.

[@JBSpookyReview]

I have to agree with you and I also would never kill a fluffy pup.

[@marcuscowles3384]

Whoohoo!!

[@JBSpookyReview]

Thank you for watching!

[@deadNightwatchman]

R. I. P. Quee

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know aww.

[@dvd11811]

The phrase is "couldn't care less" not "could care less" and Breaker High cast included Ryan Gosling, not Ryan Reynolds ...

[@ketcherinthery5079]

I could care less about this comment lol

[@ketcherinthery5079]

Implying that i cared enough to read it and analyze it and also that i "could care less" bc i obviously cared enough to type this stupid ass comment out lmao... im baked

[@Bonez0r]

I think the Ryan Gosling / Ryan Reynolds mix-up is a deliberate joke at this point.

[@ketcherinthery5079]

@@Bonez0r that's kinda wut i was assuming lol

[@JBSpookyReview]

The Reynolds/Gosling thing is 100% on purpose and as for the bad English, that's all me. I barely passed English so I'm lucky I can even speak.

[@anthonyesposito9150]

Ryan Reynolds? Ryan Gosling JB! A for effort my dude.

[@Yesica1993]

I can never figure out which is which!

[@JBSpookyReview]

Lmao I did that on purpose.

[@kariw.6936]

Other than the ridiculousness of an ancient aquatic cryptid living in what would almost certainly be a manmade lake at most a century old (North GA has no large natural lakes), I want to know what an alligator is doing above the fall line. It's just a show, I should really just relax...

[@JBSpookyReview]

But I'm wondering how he eats and breathes and other science facts.

[@Wednesday.the.Wook.]

Damn, I never realized it before, but yeah, Queeg’s fate was kind of karmic for eating his owner huh? RIP nonetheless 🐶🖤

[@JBSpookyReview]

The Quee deserved better.

[@dubuyajay9964]

00:50. Reference to "Faraday Cage?" 01:28. I mean...have you seen the movie "Frogs?"

[@JBSpookyReview]

I own the movie frogs.

[@dubuyajay9964]

@@JBSpookyReview That's my point. Not the first time they've been used as a movie monster. And the X-Files writers love schlock.

[@Rodrixxil]

Does the JB stand for Jar-Jar Binks?

[@JBSpookyReview]

Meesa not sure.

[@peachysbaby3088]

Ryan gosling

[@JBSpookyReview]

I know, it's a joke on my part.

[@peachysbaby3088]

@JBSpookyReview I did sus that, especially as you did the same to Ryan reynolds in another review.

[@juggalo9783]

I didn't no that those two stoners licking frogs. Are the same people in the episode meet the were-monsters lmao there still getting high lmao

[@sino8r499]

Yes, they returned 3 or 4 times since the shit huffing episode

[@JBSpookyReview]

It's funny because according to IMDB that were monster episode is the first thing she's been in since like 2000.

[@edmundriddle3847]

"Couldnt" care less.....

[@JBSpookyReview]

I've said way more wrong than that.

[@Krastinos]

Dude that's Ryan Gosling not Ryan Reynolds get your celebrities right my man

[@JBSpookyReview]

Haha that was on purpose. I made the same joke when Ryan Reynolds was in the episode Syzygy.

[@Krastinos]

@@JBSpookyReview I see

[@NuclearBronsonRex]

Glad Files had the balls to kill a dog. Most shows are too cowardly.

[@sino8r499]

Yeah, that dog was lame for an fbi agent. That thing is barely enough dog for even someone like Paris Hilton and the purse dog weirdos from back in the day lol

[@JBSpookyReview]

They definitely didn't shy away from doing it. I'm surprised there was no blowback.

[@richardhellawell4596]

I think in season 3 after all the tragedy Mulder and Scully are just enjoying there cases together. in my opinion they are the happiest they ever will be before the darkness of season 4

[@JBSpookyReview]

I think you're right, things get dark quick.