r/AITA for Naming My Baby "Luffy?"

[@EnvyVGrimm]

Just a heads-up for the school story. If you have a child with an IEP and move to a different school district, and the new district can't accommodate the needs of the IEP you can get a waver to send your child to a school that can accommodate. They can even have a school bus that picks the kid up. (It might be that it's in the same district and not across district I am not sure)

[@Ikajo]

It is wild to me that schools in the USA is funded per district. That just means rich neighbourhoods get better schools in comparison to poor neighbourhoods. In Sweden, the schools are funded based on the municipality. With money coming from the county and nation taxes as well. The school receives money for each student.

[@curtisalex456]

@@Ikajo Rich people did their best to keep the system that way mainly because of racism (also classism). There were instances when the system was changed. The rich people fought for years in Courts to get their way.

[@BeeWhistler]

@@IkajoThat’s precisely what’s happened. Discontent with our school system is at all all time high. I wish we could model it after Sweden’s. My oldest daughter couldn’t get any teachers to actually give her the accommodations she was supposed to have and ended up testing for her diploma rather than repeat the classes she failed because she couldn’t handle the absurd amounts of homework. My son went to independent study because of bullying. He’s been put in a separate special ed classroom at 7 and it was next to impossible for him to get out… the standard for his behavior was set higher than it was for students who never entered that classroom. My youngest has been homeschooled since she was 10 because her Autism, ADHD and anxiety were supposed to give her accommodations but, like her sister, she was in a regular over full classroom with noise and distractions and they tried to make do with an aide… who would just give her answers to math problems when she couldn’t understand them quickly enough. The panic attacks every morning were the final straw. And we were in a well-funded district… and they were constantly holding fundraisers anyway. So imagine a kid with ADHD or Autism in a poorer district. I just don’t know what hope there is if they don’t rip up the whole thing and start over.

[@MyBanannas]

@@curtisalex456 You're forgetting the teacher's unions. Teacher's pay is garbage, and it's not worth it for a lot of teachers to put in the effort to fix an already terrible school. If school choice is implemented, they'll have to put in an enormous amount of effort compared to their pay in order to fix their school up enough to avoid too many students going somewhere else resulting in the school getting partially or fully shut down.

[@Ikajo]

@@BeeWhistler Homeschooling is not allowed in Sweden... but there are efforts to help struggling students. Our schools still have issues, I have worked as a teacher and it is gruelling. But at least it is 100% free for students and their families. Including school lunches and teaching materials. Education is less of a class thing.

[@neilprice513]

I knew a girl with a FIRST NAME of "Rainbow Moonbeam Starchild", which she hated and wanted everyone to call her Sally. She later got her name officially changed and this caused a nasty fight with her parents (which she had to go no contact because of it). Maisie IS dumb for wanting to name their kid Luffy

[@gbarrows04]

Jesus... Lol that is terrible

[@SpiderRiderKya]

I met someone once with two kids, both boys, named, I kid you not, Angelus and Lestat.

[@blaa6]

If you're gonna name your kid something that's a reference, USE THE MIDDLE NAME!!!

[@serge263]

Squire Sebastian Senator

[@neilprice513]

@@SpiderRiderKya 🤦‍♂🤦‍♂

[@Zaddy-Lu]

In the raised in Japan story, OP didn't pretend to be ethnically Japanese. The room mates friend literally told her that if she was telling the truth, she should be able to speak Japanese. Then OP spoke Japanese, she never said she IS ethnically Japanese. In fact, she explained (in Japanese) her background, why she was named that, and how she knew the language. The friend is embarrassed because said something embarrassing, while attempting to degrade and embarrass OP in front of a group of people that OP didn't know. OP should "apologize" to the friend for the friends error, in Japanese 😇

[@abcdefghijkl123454]

the main problem is that the people that tout about "cultural appropriation" encounter coggnitive dissonance once you make them see how nebulous the concept of nationality is and that it cannot be reduced to genealogical trees

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

@@abcdefghijkl123454 and, in my experience, it's mostly americans that do it. Ethinicities, minorities and immigrants do not have that approach to cultural issues in most European countries - with the exception of France and the UK, that are their own very particular cans of worms.

[@mousem7071]

It's really silly I once met an elderly African American lady who had a Japanese name. The reason her mom was close to a neighbor who was Japanese and asked her to bless her daughter with a name. She loved her name and the reason it came to be and loved sharing that story.

[@bluestreaker9242]

@@SidereusOfTheFallen Yeah, as an American, myself, I can absolutely confirm we're pretty notorious for that, and I fucking hate it. Like, I've found the concept of White Knighting to be super disrespectful, ya know; seeing as it's, in essence, thinly-veiled bigotry. The "you're not allowed to explore other people's cultures unless you're from that culture" mentality, as well as the "hush, I'm being offended for you" mentality, are SUPER gross, because we're all of us different in some capacity and we should be celebrating those differences, not shunning them; and, just as well, people should be allowed to speak freely about their opinions without effectively being told through subtext their opinion doesn't matter. Eh, then again, maybe that's just because the environment I've been raised in gave me the privilege of having an open mind about exploring the differences of people and the world around me? I feel that's certainly a key critical element to how people treat other people, but eh, I dunno; I'm no Psych/Soci Major, so I could be wrong: there be an exception to just about every norm, after all. XD

[@jessicalee5260]

In the words of a group on FB: Children are not billboards for your Fandoms. It's like enforcing on your kid, AT BIRTH, that they WILL like anime, or else. Not to mention the bullying. Kids are not accessories, they are living, breathing, FEELING human beings.

[@anthonyrowlodge5357]

Just like Disney or Harry Potter parents who name their kids the names in those, I remember when the first Harry Potter movie came out, not long after, a woman named her daughter Harmione. Without the context, they're normal names, but when you tell them why your parents named you that because it's their favorite Disney or Harry Potter character, you're fucked

[@num1pyrogurl]

I agree with every bit of this. but also luffy IS a cute name Edit bc YALL CANT READ I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING IN THIS FUCKING COMMENT, i just THINK luffy is a cute name I NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT NAMING A HUMAN LUFFY but you all just have a NEED to comment and tell me im wrong bc I AGREE

[@audreym3908]

I agree, but there are some names that I feel are ok naming your kid from OP, like Robin, Franky, or Brook.

[@astartea8426]

​​@@num1pyrogurlI absolutely agree with you... that's why I named my DOG "Luffy"😂😂😂

[@abiean222]

also, middle names are a thing. give your kid a normal not-gonna-get-bullied-over first name, and a cool middle name. hell, give your kid 5 middle names if you want! no one pays attention to middle names.

[@noranizaazmi6523]

Story 5: Culturally: she is Japanese. But ethnically, she isn’t. But that doesn’t make the girl accusing her of being racist any better.

[@twistysunshine]

Also a Japanese person ignoring a Korean person's ethnicity, treating them like they're disgusting... that's actually racist as in "has a recent nasty fucking history" racist. The roommates friend needs to get over her embarrassment and apologize bc she was the one assuming people's ethnicity AND culture, and with the added history behind these specific ethnicities it makes her attitude worse

[@Kiefsti]

@@twistysunshine Right? Everyone all trying to prove OP is actually Japanese, are completely ignoring the disgusting and inappropriate racism towards a Korean!

[@MHLegacy]

If I'm not mistaken, a person cannot legally be a Japanese citizen unless they are ethnically Japanese. I don't think that law has changed in Japan, but maybe someday it will.

[@Wendy_O._Koopa]

@@KiefstiIKR? A normal take might be "Oh my Gawd, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white!" but everyone's stumbling over each other trying to prove she's Japanese _enough._ Zero tolerance cultural appropriation doesn't even make sense, Mexicans don't care if you eat burritos, Japanese don't care if (or rather, encourage) you to wear kimonos, Europeans don't care if you drink the beer imported from their country; what people _don't_ want is acting like all indigenous groups are the same and wearing big Hollywood headdresses full of feathers you didn't earn.

[@Kiefsti]

@@Wendy_O._Koopa I absolutely read that in Gretchen Wiener's voice 🤣 but you're right! My Grandfather was Lakota and we hate seeing ceremonial headdress worn at Coachella, but love seeing genuine interest shown by visitors at powwows and events. And his wife, my England-born Gramma, made a mean bannock 😂 It's the intent meant behind the action!

[@Cool8Stan]

The School needs a a-hole score in my opinion... they broke confidential information to the other family. No one else would have known about her discussion unless she told other parents...

[@kanedaku]

💯GDPR rules in the UK and EU means it would be actually illegal for the school to release this information. Big fine from the information commissioner

[@anonymouslee2083]

@@kanedakuIn the United States, it might be a violation of the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA) of 1974. That law regulates access to school related records and information. OP should talk to a lawyer about that one.

[@jamald5327]

100% agree

[@prismghostvodsstuff6536]

Eh I feel there’s not enough context for that. We literally don’t know how the parents know this, it might be beca Of the school, it might not, we don’t know

[@dracorei5143]

I agree with Rslash on the Japanese one. It’s kinda crazy because I just watched a video about a guy whose grandparents moved to Japan in the 50s and 60s, had kids there, and then had him. He was born and raised in Japan but was still hesitant to call himself Japanese since he was ethnically British. But you could tell he was a lot more comfortable speaking Japanese than speaking English and knew the culture. It’s definitely a brain teaser to think about.

[@liamreitsma5312]

Not really a brain teaser. Culturally she can claim to be Japanese. She can speak it, grew up there and probably follows some traditions. However she can’t claim to be ethnically Japanese. As long as you follow one of those you can call yourself Japanese, but you might want to clarify why if you don’t ethnically look like one.

[@dudeorduuude5211]

​@@liamreitsma5312but 'Mericans don't get that.

[@dinlupus3196]

is such a weird concept to me. like what, you have to look like a stereotypical asian person to be one?, no only that but to have blood roots as well? what are we, completely different species of animals depending in who is our ancestors?

[@KoreaWithKids]

My understanding is that Japan doesn't grant citizenship based on being born in the country.

[@Lilnaomi3]

@@dudeorduuude5211 They'd get it pretty easily if instead of saying my nationality is Japanese but I'm ethnically white, instead saying I'm from Japan but my family is X race. It's not a hard concept. People may challenge it by saying something stupid and demand proof, like knowing the language but people would get it. People move and people grow up in different places, it's an easy concept.

[@6xArth]

1st story: She could just name the kid Ace, like Luffy's brother from the series. Still a cool name and she can get her lil tribute to the series she likes.

[@sasi-justsilenca3531]

I had the same thought!!! I mean there are names you can give your child without automatically labeling your child as a offspring from an anime fan.

[@firepuppies4086]

Ace, Garth (Garp), Drake, Roger, or if they are more Latino inclined, Diego (Zorro's real, close enough to Zoro)

[@Fire-Manz]

Now, that's a great compromise!

[@TKmeh]

Heck, Franky is a cool name too! And Brook is as well, she could’ve chosen any other strawhat name like those two if she wanted a strawhat. But if she just wants a one piece reference, then she has literal pages of characters to choose from including some fan favorites like Law, Kidd, and Drake and even could have chosen Koby/Coby and this is just off the top of my head. There’s thousands more she could have chosen that sound like actual names, also hearing Dabney say Luffy is his last name just hurts my soul, since it’s Japanese naming conventions that put family/last name first.

[@The_AuraMaster]

Maybe this is just me, but in my personal opinion I don't think Ace is a good name either. Definitely better than Luffy, but I feel like there would still be bullying. *With all that said, I'm also not good with kids' names.* Edit: putting asterisks on the last sentence so people will actually read it instead of trying to cause shit after acting illiterate.

[@lordroyalnightmare]

Ok, technically Luffy is the character's "first" name in the English sense. Japanese names present the family name first, then the given name. Normally when bringing anime over for English audiences, they adjust it so it makes sense to us, but the Monkey D part is actually relevant to the story, so they left names in their original format

[@shinerstheseagull]

I feel his confusion tho. Every time I’m watching or reading Japanese media that’s translated to English, I always have that moment of “okay, did they translate the structure of names to English or did they keep the Japanese structure?”

[@lordroyalnightmare]

Good point, I do that, too. From what I've seen, most official English Dub's get the English structure, but One Piece is a particular exception because the structure is plot relevant

[@KiinyoWest]

Monkey D. is the full surname. i.e Monkey D. Dragon.

[@dapt500]

​@ahegao287 D. Is their middle name ie Gol D. Roger

[@KiinyoWest]

@@dapt500 Monkey D. Luffy, Monkey D. Garp, Monkey D. Dragon. Monkey D. Is definitely the surname.

[@bean_IAm]

As someone who is named Sachi, both a common name in anime and in Japan, I can safely say I was definitely bullied and mocked for my name. One of my friends in HS who I had known since freshman year, apparently didnt believe my name was my name until he saw my school ID. Dont get me wrong, I love my name, but I can only imagine the bullying that would come from the name Luffy

[@ollehkacb]

Luffy is a peculiar name but it isn't like " i named my child Hitler or bombastic boobtastic." Its kind of a normal name so it should be mostly fine i think.

[@Twinklethefox9022]

Luffy isn't the worst name... but for those who know about the anime .. it will spread quickly. I guess it's not that different from naming your daughter usagi. Not many people will bat an eye until you tell them they are named after an anime character. Still, don't do it.

[@ollehkacb]

@@Twinklethefox9022 i mean j don't know. I like the name hermoine and I'm not a Harry Potter fan. Seems strange to gate keep names just because they became first known in a comic or show.

[@Musical_Pigeon]

My cousin named her daughter Moxie, but she wanted to name is son Alabaster. It took her parents quite a bit on convincing to get her to see why it would be a bad idea.

[@widevader]

​​@@ollehkacbnot gate keeping, just a sure way for your kid to get bullied. Its a shame you can't name your kid hermoine but just think what's best for the kid.

[@DesertPunk3]

I love the comparison between the two types of Japanese people. Unfortunately here in Japan a lot of native Japanese people especially the older generation only see pure Japanese people as Japanese. Anyone who is mixed or outwardly don’t appear Japanese aren’t considered Japanese even if they were born and raised in Japan and only speak Japanese. If you look up racism in Japan you can find a lot of videos about people explaining their experiences with it here.

[@hotarubinariko]

That is definitely true but I think the attitude among younger generations are starting to loosen up though, just based on talking with friends and coworkers while I lived in Japan. That said, my Chinese heritage roommate was definitely not treated the same as me despite is both being born in English speaking countries, especially and mainly by the elders and leaders in our district. She was given twice the responsibility as I was and half the leniency. But our closer in age coworkers and friends didn't seem to treat her differently.

[@1337speakcow]

Yeah, I've heard a lot of stories of racism being pretty gnarly in Japan. My uncle and his family lived there for a while, all of which are mixed white and native American (Cherokee and Muscogee) and they have countless stories of being treated poorly. All sorts of things ranging from being denied entry to bars to all the daycares they lived around refusing to take their children. I know those are from the nighties and aughts, so hopefully it's gotten better, but there are absolutely issues.

[@lucth16]

By law, being born in Japan by none Japanese citizens doesn't make you Japanese. So OP in the story is not Japanese.(Can't have a Japanese passport, etc...) She is however, more culturally Japanese then a full blooded Japanese who can't even speak Japanese!

[@lucth16]

Also I'll sarcastically add to dersertpunk3's post by saying "but only white people can be racist!"

[@leeatkin5210]

100% agree with this. Look at Naomi Osaka, she was accepted as Japanese until she was winning medals in tennis. Now, she's seen as Japanese not hafu, not other. It is changing though. I have students that are bi-cultural/ha-fu/mixed and they are accepted and treated the same as those who are fully Japanese.

[@johnsuarez1404]

On the third story, the thing about being nice is that it's not a requirement. I would have moved, but op had every right not to. When you make it a demand, it's not them being nice anymore. It's you pushing people around because you are entitled.

[@floxesoffoxes5262]

But they more than likely did ask. In these posts people are always going to skew things in their favour. So for OP to come across as more justified in not moving, they say they demanded rather than asked.

[@Ezghiel]

Honestly, I agree with you. Main Character Syndrome goes both ways. If it was me, and I encountered OP in the spot I was planning to use, I'd be like "Oh crap, I should have sent someone to claim my spot sooner." And then I'd politely ask if he'd be willing to vacate for a few minutes. If he said no, I'd just kill time or something till he was done. Public space means you get to share the space, not have it to yourself. If you want it to yourself, YOU have to be willing to wait until it's unoccupied.

[@Monke16935]

@@floxesoffoxes5262have you ever been hiking? There is a lot of shit in ur backpack so it’s not as simple as walking away it would take like 10 minutes to move

[@redshirt49]

Luffy is the first name. The show does observe Japanese naming traditions, albeit inconsistently. Still, both his living relatives are also called "Monkey D." so it's pretty clear that that is his last name. But man, plenty of normal names to be found on that show. Just call him Ace. It's a cool name and although uncommon, not the kind of name one gets bullied over.

[@aaronnordan123]

I’m glad I found a comment saying Luffys last name isn’t Luffy

[@KloverKhan]

@@aaronnordan123Fr when he said it it kinda hurt my soul because of how much confidence he had

[@grandmasterestrada1592]

Educator here: I've had two kids so far with anime names. Both went by their middle names and were planning on immediately changing their names once they were of age.

[@teslagod7221]

that's because some educators are lame and dumb.letting bullying to be done on the weak.i had teachers{on elemetary(most teachers) and high school(like 25%-40% of the teachers)}, who humiliated bullies forcing them to shut up or stop their nonsense,or whenever the teachers are around,no student would want to bully or prank other student...

[@Alteusgirl]

i recently saw a debacle around a reddit post where some idiots named their twin boys Aziraphale and Crowley after the good omens characters saying "we couldnt know the show would make them gay" and i think the best thing to do when naming kids after characters is to think about how it will be for them as adults. So does the character have a name that "exists" for exemple: Sam for supernatural is a common name, heck an Acotar fan naming their kids Rhys.. fine too but if the name is specifically invented for the material like Daenerys.. it's a nope for me. You're forever associating that kid with that one character and they will be mocked for it. I also think when it comes to anime, if you're a white anime fan living in europe or america giving a super japanese name to your kid is silly, it's a name that might exist and be common in Japan but wont match your kid's culture at all (unlike the OP with the Japanese name that grew up in Japan, that one makes sense for her). I have a name that i really love (Salomé) and it's not after pop culture character but already having a name that sounds close to Salami and that comes from a biblical character considered bad was already a pain in the ass growing up.. ^^' i can't imagine being named Luffy or Daenerys or Inuzuko or whatever

[@rjmac3095]

Children can be vicious, give them something to bully another child on, and they will, simple as that. Ok, not all children, but in a school, there will be several like that! Do not ever give your childrens bullies ammunition if you can possibly avoid it!

[@teslagod7221]

@@rjmac3095 or just let children understand how wrong bullying is rather than spoiling those turd brat...

[@teslagod7221]

@@ItsMeBarnaby because society as of now still spoils turd brats and allows bullying to go unpunished. This is why we have alot of abusove people and shitty politicians, our society is total crap, specially the lord of crime loving country...

[@rileygraves2748]

As a nerd and a kid that was bullied, my advice for the sister is tough. If she vets upset hearing the name is stupid, maybe she should think about how little Luffy will feel about it.

[@7thlittleleopard7]

To be fair, though, even kids who have normal names can end up hating their names. I hated my very respectable, normal name. I longed for the Luffy of the world, alas, bland boring Becca instead. RIP. My bro felt the same way and gave his kids cool names. They like their names. And by cool I mean that there's at least some references in the names (hell, he named one child after his favourite mangaka and she really likes her name). It's pretty random how the kids will feel about their names, to be honest. That said, maybe she could just give the kid Luffy as a middle name instead.

[@spoopyvirgil4944]

@@7thlittleleopard7 The bright side of deciding to have multiple names as I grow older is I can switch between casual names (Virgil, Adrian, Ari) and cool and/or weird names (Whisper, Cloudy, Nightshade).

[@tsunaida]

You know what Luffy would be a great name for? A PET. As a weeb with two cats named after characters I like, it’s a fun way to honor your favs without absolutely humiliating your child when they’re old enough to realize what you’ve done.

[@ConservationSam]

What are your cats names? 👀

[@komradekoshka7801]

love the ramuda pfp lol

[@JewelWildmoon]

I'm curious about the names too 👀

[@samisososo]

A friend of mine named their dog Luffy, but after a dog named Lufra in a Georgette Heyer novel. I hear the name and all that comes to mind is a beautifully fluffy mini Australian shepherd. He’s the best.

[@TheDeadlyBlueWolf]

Think we have varying ideas to what counts for humiliation. I'd been cool as fuck if my mom named me after a cool/popular character instead of selecting a name so piss poor boring no one, not even my family nor any coworker calls me by it. More people refer to me by my nickname over actual name!

[@steveadams7592]

Whining because your wedding proposal didn't go as planned is the first nail in that marriage's coffin.

[@bbjjbb61]

Seriously lol.

[@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339]

Definitely. Already the fact that they had a photographer for the proposal is really weird to me and seems to scream „I need pictures to put them on social media“. But hey, what do I know, I basically don’t use anything besides YT so my wedding will be laidback with only the least amount of pictures 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@abiean222]

it reads "we are shallow as fuck" and damn if that isn't a red flag.

[@Kiefsti]

Agreed! OP was a bit of an AH, but the red flags of the other couple are much worse 😂

[@AmyoftheFlowerField]

@@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339I think that, while it's not customary, it is a thing to take pictures of this life milestone. So yeah, some people might want proposal pictures, especially if they were going to use the proposal pictures in, say, a wedding slideshow, a scrapbook, or even on the save the date/invitations. Besides, this is the age of social media, it's like, the most common and easiest way to announce an engagement to friends, family, and what have you. It's not shallow to want pictures and memories of a life event like this. Nor does it put anyone in this comment thread on the moral high ground.

[@sophieprice6190]

Story 3: I was surprised after you said 'main character' that you were talking about OP and not the entitled couple. Why should OP have to disrupt their picnic for a couple who can either wait a little bit or find somewhere else to propose? It's a public space, they should have been prepared for the situation where the spot wasn't available. It gave 'main character' vibes to me but from the couple, not OP.

[@taysiar]

I agree. OP was there first, for one. And for two, if the couple is gonna let THAT “ruin” their proposal, then that says a lot about them. It shouldn’t matter where they have the proposal, they should love each other enough to where it doesn’t matter, as long as it happens. Y’know?

[@SleepyMoth2007]

And its also like he said. Its a public space. OP has a right to be there just as much as they do.

[@RyanLarkensom617]

If the couple wanted a guaranteed spot, then they should have rented one or asked a friend to hold it for them, not expect it to be free in a public place and get pissy when others are using it

[@getoffmylawn6275]

Actually though I am surprised R/Slash got onto OP so harshly. I mean yeah food is important enough to not move after a hike. OP found a comfortable spot while no-one was there and NOTHING was set up. Why should some complete stranger move for just a photo? It isn't like they would have moved if OP was like "Come on man I been planning to eat here a few days ago." If you ain't first to a place you wanna be at then you just last. Womp womp.

[@SunkenSunnn]

yes this!

[@paulabell8747]

100% agree on the "Japanese" story- my parent are British and I was born in Australia, I don't say I'm British- I say I'm Australian.

[@allthings1022]

100 percent agree. I was born in America, and I'm American. I have German heritage, but I don't call myself a German.

[@dudeorduuude5211]

Americans, known for the stereotype of cultural ignorance, continue that ignorance now that they decided to be slightly more aware of race.

[@tabithashelton1406]

@@allthings1022 same for me. I have German genes that mostly affected by appearance and I had friends that knew me when I was a child say I looked a bit German. My grandparents on both sides were both American, so were my parents. but I do want to know now, did you ever call these genes or heritage "German blood" or was that just me lol

[@YaBoyFerid]

I'm British and have Hispanic heritage, but I won't say I'm from somewhere I'm not as I wasn't born there and don't speak Spanish... I'm British and to say anything else would be stupid

[@Mrguitarman791]

I agree with it too. I’m Canadian, my parents were born and raised in Canada, my grandparents/ great grandparents came from Europe. I don’t say that I’m European in any way.

[@brittneybrat8911]

Just going off the title alone people need to remember that the name you pick for your baby goes with them until ADULTHOOD. It's not just a cute lol moment for naming your toddlers.

[@vhaelen326]

exactly, if you for some reason HAVE to put a stupid name in, do it as the middle name so they can shorten it to just the first letter if they are embarassed, and better yet... dont do it at all

[@ramenbomberdeluxe4958]

Yeah, and for the love of God, NEVER name a kid John Doe. Actual John Does who were good citizens have gone through awful situations because of this :/

[@xLostInFirex]

Yeah, why not just use it as a nickname when he's a baby/toddler if she really wants to that bad?

[@bradleyj.fortner2203]

That's the actual reason as to why we have middle names. If for some reason you don't like your first name, you can legally go by the middle. It's your name too.

[@ramenbomberdeluxe4958]

@@bradleyj.fortner2203 r/TIL the reason we have middle names! Thanks for the fun fact ^^

[@BubblyBlackbird]

"The whole point of a public space is that it's shared." Yeah, that's why the couple and the photographer shouldn't have decided to propose in a public place if they wanted it private. The only "main characters" in this story are the people who think they can approach someone in public and just tell them to leave.

[@rockmanzeroxexedash]

100% agree. It blows my mind people think its ok to try andbully one guy to leave a public spot. If it was a dozen people i wonder if these people would feel the same lol

[@nikitatavernitilitvynova]

Imagine someone telling me I'm culturally appropriating because my name is Russian and I look Asian. Wtf? My mom is Ukrainian and wanted to name my brother Nikita since it's traditionally a men's name. And I look Asian because my Italian dad happened to have almond eyes. We're spot on. I look a ton like my aunt, my dad's sister in some photos. These people are so stupid. It's incredible.

[@Alinka909]

Yeah I’m ethnically Korean but I was born in a post-Soviet country. My name is Russian and Russian is my first language. I can’t imagine being as dense as the girl calling it cultural appropriation 😭

[@Kiefsti]

Right? I'm ethnically Indigenous, named an "old school" vintage Scandinavian name, live in Canada, and don't speak my Indigenous language/nor my name sake language/ nor the alternative French of Canada. With zero desire or need to "prove" to any "cultural" requirements of my blood 😂 Nasty girl was just a racist herself imho!

[@Wendy_O._Koopa]

It's still wild to me that "Asian" means something that _doesn't_ include Russia and India and other notably Asian countries.

[@diamandcharme-kerhorest7221]

you are litterally eurasian and I say that as a eurasian myself 🤦 Just look at the russian tribes, almost none of them are "caucasian" lmao you are traditionally more russian/ukranian looking as my blond/blueyed ass bahah I hate uncultured people fr..

[@JewelWildmoon]

I'd just tell them to either mind their own business or take it up with the parents.

[@silverflight01]

Story 5: Uh, is she okay? Like, was she trying to one-up OP or something? Whatever it was, it's not OP's fault. All OP did was just live in Japan for a while and learn the language.

[@anionleader]

Because its them being racist towards OP, despite the fact that she is actually more Japanese than that one girl. Being Japanese American is one thing, like George Takei, but for frak's sake, take the L and drop the BS when OP schooled her like that.

[@Stinkehund]

If i remember the reddit thread correctly, OP was actually born and lived there for the first 14 years of her life before her family moved back "home".

[@dudeorduuude5211]

Yep, it was classic girl bullying, and she lost.

[@NEPAAlchey]

Asian Americans have a knack for trying to out-asian people despite only speaking English and having never left they US. They get all this clout as kids for being the cool Asian kid in lower grades, then hit the real world where actual Asian people exist and they realize they have zero personality or culture.

[@fdm2155]

@@anionleader Yeah, it cracks me up when a hyphenated American professes to be 'more' of a country they've never even visited and don't speak the language of than a native born/raised there! 😂😂

[@RezFrosting]

by story 5's logic, names like Melissa would also be culturally appropriating Greek. (it means honey bee) that person is just being racist, and dragging everyone around her as well by telling op to apologize

[@amaeliss7827]

I don't think she's really racist, I think she's insecure about/has a complicated relationship with her culture, and she compensates by being weird about it.

[@black1917]

@@amaeliss7827 No, she's a racist the actions she took were those of a racist.

[@amaeliss7827]

@@black1917 honestly I will say that a) these aren't incompatibile b) whatever reason doesn't excuse her shit behaviour c) I'd advice against making sweeping statements like this because the truth is neither of us know

[@black1917]

@@amaeliss7827 Why are you defending a racist?

[@Memyx]

Story 3 - I'm with OP. Like you said, it's a public space. Which means OP is entitled to having a picnic there in peace. I am biased, though. I don't give two shots about weddings and proposals, lol.

[@dimariahgunnemann3729]

Agreed. I thought Rslash was explaining the main character syndrome for the couple not OP!

[@MiraTheWarlock]

It's a good message to send 'be nice and do as aggressive people demand, or youre an entitled brat' So healthy

[@SunnyBurnsAll]

Agreed, I was getting angry on OP'S behalf. Reminds me of people who book seats like insane termites and depend on other people's possible goodwill.

[@kninenights]

Exactly!

[@labachaterairlandesa]

She just sat down and unpacked her picnic, and they want her to pack up her stuff and move? I might do it to be nice, but I’d be seriously annoyed at having to put everything away and unpack again. Was there so little room there that they couldn’t also do their proposal there? If the spot was so important, perhaps they should’ve had someone get there early to stake it out.

[@darkdemondevil]

If Luffy is so important, use it as a nickname or use it as their middle name. If I didn't know better, Luffy sounds just enough like it could be a middle name and most people won't know it anyway. But great googly-moogly don't name them Luffy as their first name.

[@jonathanwalsh4592]

Or use Zoro or Sanji as the name

[@divinita6012]

I can actually agree with this one. A nickname or middle name would be perfectly fine for something like this!

[@noranizaazmi6523]

Agreed! Luffy would be a fun nickname/middle name but first name?

[@Lqtech00]

Great Googly-Mogogly sounds like a great name ...lmao

[@darkdemondevil]

@@Lqtech00 It's the phrase that The Beast from "Maggie and the Ferocious Beast", says when he's surprised or excited, lol. But it would make for like some eccentric wizard's title... xD

[@angelamcphail7292]

For the last story, as someone who had lice multiple times as a kid, I completely agree with OP about staying away and making the husband deal with it. Just hearing the word makes my head itch. Plus it takes forever trying to clean and nit pick. So throwing in the potential risk of the newborn getting them and the fact that OP would be exhausted trying to juggle taking care of said newborn and all the lice care (which the husband probably wouldn’t have helped with at all) I think she made the best decision. The husband is definitely the butthole.

[@feradojuega3450]

If the couple wanted that special place they had a few options. 1. Get there early and reserve the spot 2. Wait for OP to finish. A proposal doesn't make the couple the main characters either. Just plan better

[@Iknowthishandleistaken]

Exactly, op just wanted to enjoy his meal in peace 😊

[@28BiGLoU28]

Nah, fuck that guy. Technically he's not in the wrong. But that doesnt make him not a dick.

[@VorpalSnickerSnack]

Compare this. You're at the bar alone and it's near empty, a group of 3 tell you to move cause they want to sit where you are. They're rude af, and you'd say no. If someone asks you, they must accept no also as an answer. Expecting only a yes is delusional.

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

Exactly, but according to rSlash, OP is the one with main character vibes. Ugh, gimme a break.

[@FrogAtPond]

Came to say exactly this. Absolutely unhinged to expect someone to stop in the middle of their meal and move so you can have YOUR main character moment.

[@Anna-J0]

Story 4: Rslash’s rant about how easy it is for a parent to get their child to love them made me cry. I’ve always CRAVED unconditional love from my father but I learned pretty early on that his love was very much conditional. I have autism and his love was always dependent on me not doing or saying anything that would “embarrass” him or “make him look bad” I can’t bring myself to cut him out of my life. I’d be cutting out all my half siblings, my stepmom, and my stepbrother. And they haven’t done anything to deserve that. Last time I tried going no contact with my dad was in high school from my freshman year to my junior year. I later learned that my siblings believed it was because I didn’t want to be around them that they didn’t see me.

[@aidenflame1576]

Hi stranger! I had a very similar situation tho mine was a tad more abusive. My dad would do the same shit and its awful. I have him on low to nearly no contact. I didnt realize i have autism and more until adulthood. Only knew i had adhd but didnt even knw what tht meant (i also learned tht in adulthood. I may as well have never been diagnosed for all tht knwing helped lol) It sucks when your parents shouldnt have kids if they didnt wanna parenr right? When they make it conditional on this that and the other. (And those phrases you said hit me straight in the chest cuz my dad said similar) *sigh* Some dads are awful. Anyway stranger i wanted to let you knw tht ur amazing and if u wanna be buddies we could totes do discord. (Be buds or shit talk dads or play games) Or if not then this stranger (me this time) is rooting for you! Ive hit some speed bumps but

[@Anna-J0]

@@aidenflame1576 hi stranger. Thank you so much for the kind words! It sucks that you also have a shit dad. I was able to go no contact with my dad in high school by living with my amazing mom full time. My half siblings and step brother are all very young, none of them are in high school yet. My half siblings moms all don’t like me either. My dad’s also a narcissist and believes he’s a great dad. Even though I was terrified to go to his house because I knew I’d end the visit getting screamed at, grounded, and on a few occasions smacked across the face. Also, solidarity. I have ADHD as well just like you! I wasn’t informed of my autism diagnosis until I was 15 even though I was diagnosed at 6. I know how much it sucks to not know what’s going on inside your brain and I’m sorry you only found out in adulthood.

[@user-lr7dk7mt2w]

​@@Anna-J0hey I'm super sorry about your dad and it sounds like your step mom isn't great either but how is your mom so great if they knew you were autistic at 6 and no one told you till 15 like a good parent wouldn't hide that and also you were being hit why were you allowed to visit your dad at all

[@iononcantomascrivo]

Do we have the same father?

[@Anna-J0]

@@user-lr7dk7mt2w my mom did the best she could. My current step mom is not the mother to any of my half siblings and came into the picture my senior year of high school. She’s really great. I wasn’t told about my diagnosis because I would have told everyone at school (I was a massive oversharer) and my bullying situation would have gotten worse. My mom was flat broke so she couldn’t afford to take him to court, also my dad is a sleazy narcissist ( he lied about his income when he divorced my mom to avoid paying alimony or enough child support to support us) he knows how to work the courts in his favor and since none of the times he hit me or screamed in my face was documented, it was basically pointless.

[@mikeymitchell6568]

Story 2: why is that we just assume they choose to move like it isn’t possible that they had to because of unfortunate circumstances. And a big middle finger to those kids who had friends at that school not to mention the one that apparently really needed the place to thrive, hope he doesn’t go back to bein non verbal and are really mad at the other mom for tattling that op got her kicked by tattling?

[@MinusTheCoffee]

But but but like rslash said she pays taxes and technically it’s the rules 😂. I like how rslash is complaining about the parents “taddling” on OP for what she did. But not OP snitching to the school board about the family’s living arrangements

[@userasdf]

Yeah leash didn’t give them a buthole score at least so backed off from it. Main issue is having schools be funded by districts instead of being statewide. Makes poor families in poorer areas get worse schools.ops kids shouldn’t have to go to an inferior school as well. No one deserves it but I get that any parent would prioritize their kid vs someone else’s.

[@seiun7833]

I’ve always been of the opinion that if you MUST name your kid after a piece of media or a character/person, you should really only pick names that would pass as normal ones. Incidentally this is also why “Morgan” is at the top of my future children naming list

[@vickiechandler3112]

so you are a big fan of rum?.....lol

[@audreym3908]

Mine will be Robin, Franky, Brook, Rebecca (I think), Vivi maybe. There are too many names

[@abiean222]

also, middle names! give your kid a weird middle name and it'll be fine! no one cares about middle names

[@Masquerade37]

Good point. I was named after someone from a famous horror franchise, but it's a perfectly normal name and I like it too. There's just jokes for a couple of seconds and everyone moves on.

[@Musical_Pigeon]

I too am a fan of Morgan Freeman.

[@brendanboomhour7606]

Story 3: yes, they do have a right to do their proposal in that area, but they absolutely DO NOT, have the right to disrupt strangers, ESPECIALLY in a public space they do not own, if someone doesn't wanna move, they don't have to

[@austinowens1324]

I 100% agree with this

[@Attention80]

The fact that you have the right to do something doesn't exclude you from being an asshole by doing it.

[@chrisbennett916]

@@Attention80 Agreed, right does not equal NTA

[@rxtsang]

What is that thing we hear from time to time ""Poor planning on your part does not necessitate an emergency on mine." I'm with OP on story 3.

[@codyjohnson6427]

@@Attention80 exactly. This is Am I the Asshole, not Am I the lawbreaker. No laws broken, just a bit insensitive. Bit of an asshole nonetheless

[@LaBelleKairi]

About the 3rd story, I disagree wholeheartedly with you Dabne. You said it yourself. She has a right to be there just as them because it's a public space. She doesn't have to move because of the urgency of someone else. The guy could've not proposed that time and postpone it or just go elsewhere to kill the time and come back to the spot once OP was done. The couple absolutely suck though. They clearly told the woman to make OP feels bad.

[@d.phantomfan1216]

Last story: Why would you help when your husband and brother did this? He's a grown ass man if he locked all his sick days then that's on him for exposing the entire house, and I'm with you I wouldn't risk my baby to fix his mess.

[@BeeWhistler]

Too right. And realistically, he was out those days anyway. Even with her help it’s a whole process decontaminating the place after an entire family gets infested. It’s just not responsible to return to work until it’s complete.

[@davidking8744]

For story 5. OP is culturally Japanese, so while not sharing the same race she shares the culture, knowledge and citizenship (maybe, or might not actually be a citizen it's a whole thing) while rando here is racially Japanese, but culturally American, at least in public they might be culturally Japanese at home but in general they're both probably the same "level" of Japanese but different circumstances

[@rolandkeys8297]

In my opinion a passport and birth certificate would say different. one would say born in Japan, therefor Japanese the other would say born in USA, therefor American. so the answer to the question is simple, the one that was legally born in Japan. I do reconcile that you are right as well because things are not always as cut and dry as we would like

[@fiddlemyfoddle6374]

Personally, I think being a part of the culture is way more important than being of the race. Maybe to similar enough to the circumstances but I’m Hawaiian and my family is mixed. My brother is full white but he lives and breaths the Hawaiian way like the rest of my Hawaiian blooded family does. I’d 100% call him more Hawaiian than me if all I have to offer is my race. Race is how people see you, visually. But your culture is how people experience you and vice versa. Take from that what you will but I think culture is more important than race.

[@MNNski]

I disagree with rSlash on story 3. There's a saying "Your poor planning doesn't constitute an emergency to me." Basically, if the couple wanted to propose in that one spot in a public space, they should have had someone there to make sure it kept open well in advance. OP refusing was perfectly in their own right as they were there first and all public spaces are first come first serve.

[@codyjohnson6427]

That doesn't refute the point of the reddit tho. The reddit is called "am I the asshole" and being petty to not move is an asshole move no matter what rights you have to that spot.

[@Tustin2121]

@@codyjohnson6427- Nah. The couple we being AHs more than OP was. It’s a public space. First-come-first-serve.

[@Wolfie713]

The saying is, "Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."

[@Wolfie713]

@@codyjohnson6427 "AITA for not changing my plans because someone else didn't plan ahead of time?" Oh, let's try from the perspective of the guy and his fiance.. "AITA for demanding someone move because I absolutely had to propose to my fiance right then and there?"

[@codyjohnson6427]

@@Wolfie713 if you're the type of person to be mean to everyone, even if they ask nicely, then surely you have asshole properties. You don't have to move, but it's kind of a mean thing to not move when someone asks nicely. Asshole move

[@alexandriav3956]

It always surprises me just how little people know about permits for schools. I wasn’t anywhere near my son’s school district but guess what?? I did my research and got him a permit to attend. Kids who have already been in that school district have a way better chance of getting approved for a permit too.

[@lorilancaster5917]

I did not know that. I’m glad you informed us. It would’ve been great if the other family in the story did their research and got one. And with one of their kids in the special education program, they may have also increased their chances of getting one

[@triforceofcourage100]

I have literally never heard of a permit for schools ever in my life

[@the_rachel_sam]

They don’t always work, however. The schools in my area are always packed with kids that shouldn’t be there because their parents lie about their address to get in. Applying for exceptions virtually makes no difference because of it.

[@lilyyoung1002]

I had a permit to attend a school 45 minutes away so I could get the special needs help I ended up receiving

[@robertk1701]

Cool. Need the caveat that it varies a lot by state. In my state, the school you want to leave has to be "failing". I'm sure their definition might differ from mine though.

[@MrDoverfield]

Story 3: NTA the OP told them they would just be eating. All the entitled couple had to is wait but instead they chose to be A holes. OP is definitely not the A hole for accommodating an entitled couple.

[@TomikaBrown-n2o]

That what I am saying I don't know what he is talking about talking about it's not nice so first come first serve he started to act like an entitled parent too

[@abiean222]

also, its a proposal not a wedding. the act itself is much more important then the location. if you are so concerned about getting the perfect picture for your proposal, you might just have your priorities backwards.

[@kristashafer93098]

It’s a public place. The couple should have considered that someone could have been there and had a contingency plan that wasn’t simply asking the person to vacate the spot and trying to pressure them when they declined to move. OP had just set up a large lunch so I assume that moving everything would have been a hassle. I don’t think OP was a butthole either.

[@speedlarcool132]

I think I have never been this triggered by Rslash saying Luffy's first name being Monkey. I am seething with rage (jokingly)

[@angelabailey8846]

I was searching for this comment, before I posted. I was soooooo triggered 😤

[@EzjKay]

Same I was like how did that make sense 🤣 did no one else notice like wha

[@Chrisindapurplehouse]

He triggers me a lot with his dumb comments.

[@mherrmann81687]

Well, some people just don't understand that Japan reverses the structure (compared to the western cultures), putting the Family name before the Given name... [So, it technically is his FIRST name... lol]

[@7thlittleleopard7]

To be fair, there's a lot of manga translated to English where they swap the names, and others where they don't, so it can be confusing to figure out which the one you're reading is. Did they swap, didn't they? Did they change the name to Zolo? Who knows!? XD

[@obscenityoverload5458]

Maisie... Do you want to traumatise your son because of bullying, because that'll happen

[@obscenityoverload5458]

@@desperateneedofscotch oh absolutely, But don't give the bully ammo like that eh?

[@TheImmolation]

​@@obscenityoverload5458that's the wrong way to look at it. That's like blaming a woman for being raped.

[@obscenityoverload5458]

​@@TheImmolationthat's a hell of a leap to make and equating THAT to this situation... Jesus dude

[@charlie68001]

@@TheImmolationthat is definitely NOT the same

[@obscenityoverload5458]

@@charlie68001 right?!? What weird leap to make!!

[@d.phantomfan1216]

Story 5: this girl knows other races live in Japan right, like it's a possibility to be white and live in Japan? Even then you're mixed race. She told you to prove you were from Japan and you did, were you supposed to just let her make you look like a bad person? That's not your friend and she was the one who made herself look bad by demanding proof in front of everyone, so I wouldn't worry about it we're case scenario you won't have to talk to the rue person again.

[@peachpunch9465]

Exactly! People will be so quick to call appropriation when it literally isn’t, then play the innocent victim card. I hate it! Why can’t we all just get along?

[@AyaReikoTripleElite]

@@peachpunch9465 That wouldn't be the sheltered entitled liberal douchebag way.

[@ripplecatproductions3373]

Story 3: it's a public spot, with public, if you want to make some announcement be prepared to wait for other people to be using that spot, be nice to them. Besides it could have made for wonderful unique photos to have shared the spot.

[@teslagod7221]

the only way those couples could be entitled is that they made reservation for that spot...

[@PACMANnot]

@1:39 Luffy is actually his first name and Monkey is his last. In Japan it's the respectful and polite way to address others by their family (last) name rather than the first until you get to know them and/or they allow you to address them by their first.

[@daniisarts295]

came here looking for this comment xD

[@6darren6]

@@daniisarts295same lmaoo

[@ajbakercmsu]

Naming your kid "Luffy" is a double-whammy, because it'll *also* get mispronounced constantly.

[@bibigamer502]

I don’t think the mom cared about bullying or any of that

[@john_molden]

It's interesting how R/Slash said Luffy was the last name... and yet he knows the character, and anime in general so he should know how names are structured in Japanese.

[@TheWererapter92]

Oh please everyone hating on story 1 needs to pull their heads out of their arses, kids are definitely named worse than luffy, yes the child will get bullied but not because of the name but because kids can be spiteful little sh*ts when their parents don't bring em up right, ik this because my school days all the way through till end of college was hell outside of class.

[@ellavarnes2392]

@@TheWererapter92 But giving a kid a stupid name will give bullies just one more piece of ammunition on top of everything else a kid could be bullied for....

[@Josh_the_jester]

Well there are worse names, one almost named their baby after a known serial killer

[@Nova-lu3ow]

IIRC, in Japan, when you have a baby and go to name it, you *legally* have to pick a name that's able to be spelled and pronounced properly in Japanese. It's probably a lot easier to write a Japanese name like Akane or something in kanji over a name like Michelle.

[@richardmetzler7909]

Now that's a reasonable law. (And apropos the first story: in Germany, when you register a newborn to get the birth certificate, officials can reject the name if they consider it an invitation for ridicule.)

[@bluebeanie561]

I feel so bad for all the Game of Thrones fans that they named their baby girl after a certain blond "heroine" dragon mother. Edit to add: the reason I feel bad is that when the parents first named their child "Daenerys", they thought they named their child after a "benevolent person" (their words not mine)...and then the um acts happened that questioned their good beliefs of her.

[@SRosenberg203]

yeah there are at least 150 ten year olds in the US today named after a fictional war criminal, and it's fucking hilarious.

[@abiean222]

did they go with daenerys or khaleesi? because one of those is her name and the other is a fancy word for wife.

[@ave_r_ie]

I know one person named after her, everyone calls her Dani

[@Musical_Pigeon]

Once I was in a restaurant with my ex around like 2019, We overheard a mom call to her daughter who looked like she was 11 or 12. She said Aria (I don't know how it's spelled in GOT, I never read or watched it, neither has my ex. I only know the musical term and once named a character in a short story Aria when I was in early high school), and my ex started ranting to me about how it's horrible to name your kid after a TV show character. I had to explain that Aria is a musical term and an actual name. And that the girl looks like the was born before the GOT show came out. Then I reminded him he's named after a book of the Bible. (I have a basic white bitch name. I was working on my laptop in starbuck earlier and heard my name called several times before I even placed my order. I also often see it used as the teenage version of a Karen, which saddens me a little). I think I recently heard about someone who named their twins after Crowley and the other dude from Good Omens before the show came out and got popular, like when it was a book (I've never seen or read it, I only remember Crowley from Supernatural and the amount of times I've seen David Tennant Crowley cosplays. I don't care is you name your kids after book characters. I have a teach kids with names from TV shows and that are named after pop culture things (We have a Lux, in my school this year. I don't work with him, so it took me a month to find out Lux was a boy). But all I could think was WHO THE HELL NAMES THEIR KID CROWLEY?! Look I see a LOT of names, but I've met a lot of last name first name people and first name last name people (Last names for first names and last names that are also first names), but I've seen someone go as far as Crowley. Any way CROWLEY IS A LAST NAME!

[@velvetdarksoul8741]

​@@Musical_PigeonI know someone who named their kid Lucifer

[@Turbo_Waitress]

rSlash literally translating toolbag made me smile. I feel like the whole cultural appropriation conversation is so fraught and so much more nuanced than the way it’s often discussed. This story is one of many examples of why.

[@sawoop3856]

There is no nuance. Cultural appropriation is the dumbest thing I have ever heard

[@abiean222]

@@sawoop3856 its really only valid when you are making a profit and/or mocking the culture you are appropriating. otherwise its just racism reskinned to appeal to the fad liberals.

[@cyndanetierney6449]

The problem is that people will call cultural appreciation out as appropriation.

[@velvetdarksoul8741]

​@@cyndanetierney6449I guess everyone at comicon is racist

[@TemariNaraannaschatz]

@@sawoop3856 Cultural appropriation when the term came to be refeared to White Americans being praised for doing culturally non White American things, while the people from said culture were being treated badly for it. So it was just a call out on racist practices and the intend was to not have these double standarts, so that everyone should be able to do these things without getting harassed. That and the plea to stop using religious or tradtionally holy things as jokes and respect them, just like christianity is/was respected. And it became a: you can't share culture anymore for entitled people which is nonsense.

[@Milk-ck1wv]

3rd story: It's a public mf area. I don't care if you wanna do something you should of just booked it or something or came early get this specific spot that you want for SO MUCH. It's ridiculous to expect people to just give up things to you because its the "nice thing to do" or get mad at them for sitting in a PUBLIC AREA that you coincidentally wanted. Get over it and plan ahead if this is the perfect spot for you.

[@gou0630]

exactly, if it was SOOOO important they could have sent the photographer set up before them, OP mentions she was 5 min into her meal, which means that if they had sent the photographer at least 20 min earlier OP would had to look for another spot to set up. Is like the entitled couple who wrote " we could not take pictures at this beautiful beach because it was full of undesirables, ugh!!"

[@DarkEinherjar]

Completely disagree on the 3rd story. If they wanted that spot at that specific time so badly, they should've booked it or something. Why is it that they can't wait for OP to finish her meal, but OP has to move and wait for their proposal? OP is NTA. Those people are just entitled.

[@JamilKhan-xu9fo]

How do you book a public area?

[@romanm7731]

⁠@@JamilKhan-xu9foyou don’t, but if it’s a public area, there’s going to be other people. imo if you really want nobody else in the pictures, find a more reclusive area or rent a private space.

[@romanm7731]

i mean, if they just asked nicely my view on the og post would be entirely different tho

[@TwighlightLugia]

Yeah, it's really fucking weird for Rslash to make the "I'm the main character" joke when the groom in the op is the one basically trying to kick a stranger off of public property so she doesn't mess up his photo shoot. I get that the dude wants his special moment, but like, you don't get to just guilt-trip and bully people out of their daily routines just because you're putting a ring on it. Can you imagine trying to like, force other people to move their tables at a fancy restaurant because they're in your shot?

[@ragdollfantasies]

Exactly, a shared public space, so why should OP have to leave if that's the case? This is no different than the people trying to throw folks off of beaches for wedding photos, which Rslash has already determined are the buttholes. OP did nothing wrong, and the engagement group are entitled jerks. The photographer and the groom to be decided to harass and bully OP when they didn't get their way, and then decided to turn the bride to be against them as well and blame them for a so-called ruined proposal. Give me a break. Sounds like a group of entitled children to me.

[@darkunykorn404]

My partner's parents are Taiwanese, they immigrated and had her here in Brazil. Never once in her life she felt compelled to say she was Taiwanese. She was actively annoyed when people acted and treated her like she was anything but Brazilian. She only claims her heritage now that she's legally Taiwanese via naturalisation (and still she says she's Brazilian because *that's the culture she grew up with*). I'll never understand the need to claim a culture you know next to nothing about and has no real connection to.

[@Black-pq2iw]

Sup, fellow brazilian \õ/ To add to this, we can remember that the biggest japanese/descendant population outside of Japan is right here in Brazil! I myself have a cousin who's japanese descendant and I don't have any japanese DNA. That story would be the equivalent to say these folks aren't brazilians. PS: Said Japanese AND descendants bc many seek japanese nationality and end up getting it.

[@darkunykorn404]

@@Black-pq2iwcheers fellow Brazilian :D Yeah, it's wild to pretend to be some nationality you're not. Like the other day there was a story about some Irish-American girl trying to correct an actual Irish person on Irish geography, like ??? you never even stepped a foot there??? I have a friend who married a dude of Japanese descent, she gave their kids western first names and Japanese middle names, they only use the Japanese ones lol. But they're all Brazilian!

[@Yumi_Jay]

A co worker of mine grandfather fled Italy to escape the mafia and immigrated to Brazil. She is Brazilian while also knowing Italian as she pointed out the meaning behind my surname which has Italian origins.

[@thatoneguy9843]

Story 3: I don't know how many times I've said this but; Not doing the nice thing does not make you an a-hole. Period. Op was there already, they were eating their lunch. The other couple were simply being entitled and expecting the world to move for them because its a prOpAsAl! What they wanted to do was NOT more important than what OP wanted to do. A 'nice thing to do' is simply that. A nice thing, not something that should be expected.

[@Matt-ss1ph]

I agree with all of your takes except for story 3. It’s a first come first serve thing. If OP wanted to move that’s her right but it’s also her right to stay there. She got there first and I don’t think it’s inconsiderate that she’s staying there

[@mariposa9506]

Even if someone has a right to something doesn't mean they aren't an ah

[@FigmentForever]

I commented something similar & fully agree. It’s public, they could’ve asked nicely & not been so confrontational, and/or gave OP some $ to relocate as a last resort if it was SOO vital 🙄

[@futureblade6099]

​​@@mariposa9506in a way it kinda does, not being nice doesn't equal being rude

[@codyjohnson6427]

@@futureblade6099 in a way it kinda does, not being nice when it's such a small task for you and such a huge occasion for the other party is indeed a bit insensitive

[@zerobolt9506]

This

[@Rj-ij6ko]

Last Story: You know whats funny? So Op mentions hers MIL confirmed that everything was fixed…but Op DIDNT say that MIL was mad at her…that means even MIL knows her son is a douchebag. NTA Op you’re right, husband caused this problem, he can fix it.

[@BeeWhistler]

I noticed that, lol! Sounds like one of those times where MIL is the ally of her DIL and she only went home after the responsible person she could trust confirmed that all was well.

[@DarkPrincessAly]

Personally, I don't think naming your kids after fictional characters is automatically bad. It's how you Act about it. If you're constantly obsessing over the media they're named for whenever the topic of their name comes up, it's a bad choice. Just because you love the media the name comes from makes your kid a target. Like, I have a connection like that to Stanford Pines from Gravity Falls. If I named my son Stanford and people asked about the name, I wouldn't be like "so there's this cartoon I love," I'd say "He's named after a character that really changed and influenced my outlook on life, and I wanted to honor that by giving my child that name." Because sometimes that happens, sometimes the connection you have with a fictional character is more Real than the connections you have with your family. But you gotta be sensible about it, and don't make their first name Stupid. One of my partner's brother's middle names is Skywalker, and he hates it. But at least it's not his first name.

[@HobieInTheBox]

Why do people not think of their children's futures when they give them stupid names? Your kid isn't gonna be popular or respected when he's named after a pirate terrorist, and you're not gonna be able to live vicariously through him either. Edit: also no, Luffy is his first name. In Japan they say last name-first name. So Monkey D. Luffy, is his name as stated by Japanese standard

[@crafter216]

Pirate terrorist? Are you sure you watched one piece?

[@liamzakhaev]

@@crafter216 rebels and pirates are terrorists.

[@hassanshaikh3451]

@@crafter216 Spoilers ahead I mean he did cause the destruction of a major judicial base, declared war on the world government, caused a mass prison break of the most secure prison, fought a war at the central base of the marines, and got declared one of the 4 most influential pirates who rule the grandline/new world. The world government definitely considers him a terrorist

[@sebastianquinchia1840]

​@@crafter216That's literally what he is lmao. Even if it's reluctantly, everywhere he goes he picks sides in the local political struggles and pretty much every time he takes a stand against the world government. Terrorist is a dirty word nowadays but hell, even the founding fathers of the USA were all terrorists.

[@SRosenberg203]

There are at least 150 children in the United States, who should be about age 9 or 10 right now, named "Khaleesi". I will never, ever stop laughing about that. Especially since the Khaleesi turned out to be a genocidal war criminal.

[@camilowish]

His name is Luffy. I don't know if it's a japanese or an anime thing (probably japanese) but characters in anime series say their last names before their actual names. Case in point, Luffy's grandpa is Monkey D. Garp, his dad is Monkey D. Dragon, and of course, Monkey D. Luffy.

[@haratism]

I’m pretty sure Luffy is actually Hungarian, with how deverse One Piece actually is…. I wouldn’t be surprised and also Oda said that he named his main character "Luffy" because he felt that the name suited him. When he later learned about the sailing term, "luffing", he was delighted by the coincidence.

[@gridenboat]

​@keomifishbowl Oda said that if he was in the real world, he would be Brazilian.

[@haratism]

@@gridenboatoh really? Nice.

[@neko3571]

@@haratism lol jokes on you, Hungarians also have Surname and Firstname method lol (I am Hungarian)

[@HobieInTheBox]

It's not an anime thing, it's a cultural thing. In Asian countries people typically mention the family name/surname before ones first name.

[@ConejitoPequenito]

Japan story: I don't think it's necessary to weigh ethnicity against culture. People can feel connected to their identity in different ways, the mature thing is to connect on the things you got in common

[@amaeliss7827]

That's a very accurate and mature take, yeah

[@rjmac3095]

Americans have an unusual attitude towards nationality/ethnicity, they think that where their ancestors are from is their nationality/ethnicity, in pretty much all other countries you are the nationality of the country you grew up in. That 'Japanese' girl was more American than Japanese, and OP was more Japanese than anything else. I know someone with parents from 2 different countries, born in a third country, and raised from 2 to adulthood in a 4th country, as far as he and everyone else that knows him are concerned, he's from the 4th country!

[@Cantfi]

​@@rjmac3095Yeah, I don't really get the problem Americans are creating. She was born in Japan, so she's Japanese.

[@kanedaku]

From the point where US-JP girl accused OP of appropriating Japanese culture yet she couldn't respond in Japanese; (probably) not knowing where her family is from in Japan, and dismissed the fact that OP was _BORN_ in Japan - well she probably should have hari-kiri-tikanawad right there and then and be done. This is a tale as old as time; someone professes to be an expert in something, someone replies in either that language, or relating to that field of/or expertise; they get shown to be a fraud, yet THEY expect an apology for being shown up? GTFO

[@teslagod7221]

@@rjmac3095 actually,he may be culturally right to believe he's part of that 4th country,but he cannot escape the fact he was born at the 3rd country,which is his citizenship,unless the parents had made legality on changing his citizenship,the fact will stay that where you were born is your citizenship...

[@chasingchaos6960]

Story 2, scenic spot: RSLASH, i remember u saying a few times that “absence of niceness isn’t meanness.” i don’t think OP was in the wrong for not moving, they got there first and the other people aren’t entitled to privacy in a public space. they were super rude too, so OP definitely didn’t owe them niceness

[@onlyhalfevil_333]

Story 3: I disagree with you. In a public place you can't expect people to drop what they are doing to cater to your own BS. Dude had options. He could have waited and have the photographer inform him when OP left. Or he could have bribed OP for the spot. Cash would have made me move lol

[@vickiechandler3112]

LOL...i too can be paid off to interupt my meal...lol and its not like the bride didnt know the proposal was going to happen from the sound of it unless they always have someone following them around taking pics....

[@JaytheJaskonian]

The first story reminds me of a post i saw from someone who also wanted to name their baby after a one piece character. She ended up giving the baby the first name Rowan and the middle name Noah, two perfectly normal names that nobody would think is an anime reference. But the mom still gets to know internally that they're named after a character called Roronoa. Best of both worlds, baby has a perfectly normal name and the mom gets a nod to her favorite character that only she and her S/O know about

[@Pikapower7]

This is brilliant.

[@karatebat5156]

That's actually pretty clever.

[@seasons4631]

Story 3: hard disagree. It's a PUBLIC space. While yes, you can ask people to move, you cannot be upset when they say no. You are not entitled to that space when someone else is there first. If you want a private space, pay for one

[@undersiren222]

I agree- R/slash said himself that it's a public space so OP has the right to be there and deny that he uses it...if the guy was so upset then he should've planned ahead and looked for multiple back up spots or something- it's not like he's entitled to that one spot

[@DemonNextrous]

This. 100% this.

[@nickdriscoll6131]

Well, sure. The photographer isn’t entitled to the spot. But it just seems like basic kindness to allow the guy to use it for their once in a lifetime photo op, and just postpone your meal for ten minutes, or eat somewhere else for a change.

[@undersiren222]

@@nickdriscoll6131 yea but it's not like they couldn't wait till OP was done ether? Acting like OP was at fault was just childish and immature when they were trying to enjoy the pretty spot

[@nickdriscoll6131]

@@undersiren222 I wondered about that, too. Sometimes you don’t have much of a window to get the light you want I suppose, so maybe that’s why? I don’t know. But yeah, seems like everyone was a bit rude here.

[@marissaworsham3062]

Proposal story: that person was already there. She didn't have to move. The guy proposing should have been prepared for a person being there and shouldn't have asked that person to leave. NTA

[@laughableInflection]

Agreed. The story does give "main character syndrome" but not from OP. It reminds me of a story from a while back where OP had already picked a spot on the beach and someone else told them to move so they could take pictures.

[@Nikita_Akashya]

@@laughableInflection Exactly. Why does OP have to move when they have no relation to these people who just want that spot to take pictures? OP was in the middle of eating their meal. If people want to propose in a public place then they need to be prepared for other people being there. You don't just expect random strangers to accomodate your plans that they didn't agree to. My roommate just had an unannounced visit from his family and let my other roommate open the door for them. That is hella entitled, especially since I was still in my pajamas and was not expecting any visitors today. I hate it when he has these people over without saying they will be over. Especially on the weekends, since they keep seeing me in my PJs! I don't want to accomodate strangers I am not expecting! What if I just got out of the shower and am in my bathrobes? I don't want these people seeing me in my bathrobes! Ok, bit of a rant, but basically what I'm saying is that people shouldn't have to accomodate a random strangers demand when they didn't agree to any of it. I hate that shit!

[@michaelkaster5058]

Or you could be a compassionate human and move when asked for a hopefully once in a lifetime moment for a person. Instead of a the new way of being for people, self-absorbed uncaring POS's that were home schooled and have no social graces. You forget that redditers always paint themselves in the best possible light.

[@faeangel7649]

Seriously And I'm going to guess the area was big enough that the guy could have still proposed there, he just didn't want to risk OP being in the pictures. Everyone was rude af to OP from the first ask, I wouldn't have gone through all the effort of packing back up and moving again for them either.

[@marissaworsham3062]

@@faeangel7649 And if he's going to propose to her in a public park, he should have had at LEAST 5 spots picked out in case of people. I hate people who don't plan ahead.

[@ShutterbugF]

I understand the Japenese thing. My parents named me Sasha and in my childhood I either got people telling me they know a dog named Sasha (it was the 90's) or if I was Russian. Nope, Scottish heritage Canadian through and through. I even had one supply teacher insist on calling me Alexandra because Sasha was supposed to be a nickname of that name in Russia. I leaned into it more as an adult where I learned to mimick a few russian phrases from KZbin and so when people would ask me if I was russian I would say no, but then mutter to myself in russian to make them paranoid. I stopped doing it after the invasion but it was fun for a while.

[@thomasdatoneboi405]

That is the best thing I've read all day, you've got a great sense of humour

[@ettinakitten5047]

Wait, my parents weren't unique in calling our dog Sasha?

[@Devilsblight86]

I met a kid who was named SCYTHER, as in the POKÉMON. Luckily, kids found his name cool and didn't mess with him.

[@karatebat5156]

Thank goodness. I still hope they get their name changed, though.

[@seaweedstarfy]

Imagine if that kid is a Pokémon fan and he has a friend who says his favorite is Scyther

[@codyjohnson6427]

Lmaoo. Honestly, that is pretty cool. But names like that should be reserved for animals not your children. Some parents are weird

[@izayayozora]

@@codyjohnson6427i disagree now yes some like a Pokémon is understandable but I can think of a few names from anime that are pretty normal as long as you make sure it doesn’t clash with your last name

[@leileyaravencroft]

No. No way! I mean I love Pokémon too but… I would NEVER name my child after one. Thank GOODNESS his classmates are good kids. Holy crap, his parents are a-holes.

[@meloncornets3034]

As someone who accidentally named their child after an anime character (Context: I liked a name since childhood and it turned out to be a english dubed character's western name. Not their actual Japanese name) Yeah, don't do it lol. In Japan, they even have a name for people who twist kanji around to give their kids anime or otherwise silly names (Kira-Kira names)

[@vickiechandler3112]

i accidently gave my older daughter the initials of mickey mouse club. my uncle figured out when she was 12 that you could sing her 1st and middle names to the tune of the song m-i-c-k-e-y m-o-u-s-e ....so of course on the 2nd kid i had to do it on purpose...lol

[@audreym3908]

What's the show called?

[@EnDB]

I'm glad OP stayed and ate her food. It's not like the proposal was a surprise or they rented the spot, it's for public use. What's wrong with waiting your turn?

[@Darkaoron]

Right like this is just plainly poor planning. If you honestly expect you can have a spot specifically reserved for you then YOU have the main character syndrome not the other way around. I had to think about this in what would I do and I would genuinely make plans that do not require people who I do not know to work around them. Especially for a proposal you never know what may come up so you have to plan around everything. A good partner would never put all their bets into a proposal into 1 horse unless they genuinely believe they can effects roll with the punches if it fails.

[@Darkaoron]

Not to mention my partner and I would absolutely love to make a person who wasn’t willing to move feel strange when we continue to do the proposal in that same spot despite the person being there because we do not let people get in the way of what we want to do. It wouldn’t be rude because we both have every right to be there as anyone else would but we wouldn’t expect them to change their plans for ours.

[@rhawensilvr9725]

Story 3: I absolutely disagree with Rslash, the only Ahole was on the proposal people and only because of the reactions/comments. You’re entitled to ask a person to move spots because it is public- KEY WORD ask, as in the answer can be yes or no. You don’t get to be upset when someone, who was there first, says they don’t want to move. OP had no emotional connection not everyone is going to bow down to you just cause you’ve decided to kneel with a ring. And what could that spot possibly have that you couldn’t walk somewhere else, or god forbid have someone near by when you do propose? He had a professional photographer but you had to be alone? No way Rslash, you’re just really wrong on this one

[@josephinenelan4204]

Yeah, especially with a spread out they’d have to pack up. If you propose in a public place you have to be aware that people might be there…

[@blackrex828]

Man, I really thought he was gonna be on op sides since it's just like someone who wants to use a weight bench at a gym or someone that wants to film themselves working out at gym but there's other people in their shots. So I agree with you 💯%

[@tandem2979]

I think he MUST have missed the fact that it takes time and effort to OP to set up, because he's had similar stories before where he was like "uh, yeah, the person trying to FORCE you to move from a public space is the butthole". Because if the person could have just picked up a basket and walked away- it's no problem and they should have just moved. But they would have had to PACK to move.

[@babybunbuntin]

Yeah rslash is slowly making it where he gets the wrong rating in each video, I think he need to reread and actually use his head before rating at times

[@sarahmiller2431]

Came here to say this, like would it have been nice if they had moved? Yes... but also there probabky was plenty of space to still take pictures up there without op being in the way. I wasn't there so I'm not sure but usually places like that have a bit of space so people can enjoy being up there and seeing nature... but yeah the proposal people were just being selfish

[@d.phantomfan1216]

Story 4: part of me is very focused on dad being ready for her to go no contact with them, it's one thing to be oblivious when everyone told you this was going to happen, but in the dad's case he knew he was neglectful and knew he was losing a daughter but didn't care. Anyway your sister was warned to many time to be shown any sympathy, and even now she's still doing it. She's not wondering what she did wrong or how to fix it she just complaining about how she doesn't deserve it.

[@lorilancaster5917]

It’s beyond horrible that these people had a kid and gave no craps about her. Sister only cares about losing mommy status and not losing her kid.

[@maieen2665]

You peeped that, too? I'm glad the daughter got out of that environment.

[@emeraldnickel]

Story 3: I know that proposals are important moments, but they aren’t an excuse to walk all over other people. I don’t think OP is in the wrong.

[@Josh_the_jester]

Story 3: why is she at all surprised that the person whom she neglected doesn't wanna see her again? They say "you don't really know what you have until it's gone" and BOI does it present itself vary generously here

[@monsterchic162]

because a lot of emotionally abusive or neglectful parents don't actually think they were abusive. I told my mother outright that I was moving out and she got into a fight with me the night i left before cause i assumed she was just gonna dump me at the bus stop and say good riddance. Apparently she couldn't fathom why, after telling me everyday for years that she was happier when I wasn't around and couldn't wait for me to leave, that I felt like she didn't love me enough to give me a proper send off. It's called cognitive dissonance.

[@jakuth99]

For the third story, my asshole score depends on what the couple wanted him to do. If they wanted him to move, like, 5 feet, that’s one thing. If they wanted him to pack up specifically for the proposal, that’s more effort than I’d request out of someone that wasn’t invested in this proposal

[@QuietChaos1996]

It sounds like they wanted OP to pack everything up for like 25 to 30 minutes. Since there was a photographer there and probably going to get photos for the couple's engagement.

[@iononcantomascrivo]

Story number four: OP is NOT the butthole. I would advise her not to apologize because her sister absolutely needed to hear that. It's not uncommon for children who are neglected or not bonded with their parents to go no contact once they're finally able to. I once knew a lady, let's call her Kelly, who was the absolute worst example of what a parent should be. She neglected children to the point, that they often wore clothes that didn't fit, shoes that were too small, had no school supplies, went hungry and her youngest’s teeth were rotting out of his head. Kelly, on the other hand, always had her hair done, her nails done, a full pack of cigarettes and booze in the fridge. It's the important things that matter in life, right? I cut contact with Kelly when her kids were teenagers, but I heard through the grapevine that her son and daughter have little, if anything, resembling a relationship with her. Kelly has also been barred from seeing her only grandchild. I also heard that Kelly, in her true victim mentality fashion, whines to anyone who will listen about how her kids are “ungrateful” and how they could “blow off” their own mother. If I was still in contact with her, I would tell her directly to her face that she earned it by being a terrible wife and mother (in name only). Kelly's nothing more than an egg donor. She made her bed of nails and now she has to lay on it.

[@dieselmunkey]

Story 3: what makes those peoples proposal any more important than the special meal the other person enjoys? Definitely NTA

[@jessyxit]

be real rn, a proposal to a marriage vs lunch?

[@defineanime5549]

​@@jessyxitwhat places a proposal over what the other person was doing. Both seem important to their respective people

[@joshdillon9637]

@@jessyxit your wedding proposal means nothing to me. I don't know you. My lunch however, is important to me. Plus I was here first. You can wait or go somewhere else.

[@jessyxit]

@@joshdillon9637 and that's why you're selfish, Karma exists ^^

[@joshdillon9637]

@@jessyxit yeah, Karma for them going straight into entitlement mode as soon as I tell them to just let me finish my lunch.

[@juanhaines7295]

Story 1 nta never give someone a name that makes them a easy target.

[@supervegito2277]

As someone who did get harrassed in school, dear god YES, do i agree with this statement. Its a dick move at best...

[@KazeShikamaru]

You'll be bullied either way people who think, "Don't name them X, they'll be bullied for it." Bro my name is a common french name for men and I Still got made fun of. People be doing too much.

[@audreyharris7643]

​@@KazeShikamarutrue

[@urgon6321]

@@desperateneedofscotch, in my school there was this one kid named Ariel. Which happens to be also the name for a brand of washing detergent. He was called with EVERY washing detergent brand name but his given name. To be honest this wasn't really his parents' fault, because when he was born, we only have one detergent brand, "E"...

[@Stinkehund]

@@KazeShikamaru Fair point, but there's a spectrum here. It goes from "name so boring and universal that they can barely be made fun of" and "name so outrageously weird that nobody will ever take it seriously" - and since the parent doesn't have to live with the name they pick for their child, they should take on the decision to do so with more forethought than, say, naming a pet.

[@iank472]

The fact that the line "My name's Monkey D Luffy! My parents hated me!" is in the One Piece abridged (None Piece) is all the answer you need for that one....

[@SteviiLove]

Story 5; NTA. That roommate's friend is just looking to be a victim. There is no winning with people like that, especially when we don't get to choose the names we are assigned at birth, only later on if we don't identify with those names.

[@dudeorduuude5211]

Agreed. Classic woman's attempt to dominate and bully but it backfired. She stuck her foot in her mouth and didn't act like a decent human and got to know someone and got more information first.

[@Iflie]

She was embarrassed because she can't speak japanese well at all and was bluffing.

[@maxbaker7841]

​@dudeorduuude5211 Why is this a "woman's attempt"? You could take out the "woman's" and your sentence would make just as much sense and make you sound less like you're trying to generalize that all women try to play the victim.

[@plannedsarcasm6930]

Demanding that I move instead of asking, is a grade A way to get me not to move at all

[@vickiechandler3112]

i can eat reeeeaaalllly slow when i need to .....lol

[@H3xx99]

For the Picnic story, I have to disagree. They waited until OP was alread set up. If they'd caught her before putting her entire picnic out, then it wouldn't have been a big deal. But no, they came up and was like "You gotta pack all this back up after you just got set up and move so We can fake this wedding proposal."

[@blancacastaneda7416]

Actually his name is Luffy. Japanese people address each other saying the last name first.

[@StormTrooperEX]

yes but its still the last name

[@takuislove]

Monkey D. is what would be considered his last name in western Countries. Seen by the fact that his Granddad is called Monkey D. Garb. dont incorrect people please

[@GreatQuestionFran]

​@StormTrooperEX wrong because Monkey is actually his last name. His grandfather is Monkey D. Gary and his father is Monkey D. Dragon.

[@Juju2927]

​@@StormTrooperEXthen explain to me how it is his last name if his father is Monkey D. Dragon and grand father Monkey D. Garp?

[@LyreHarper]

Family name first (surname equivalent), Given name last (first name equivalent). Luffy is the given name, Monkey the family name. It's the cultural emphasis on family before individuals, opposing what we experience.

[@hashtagcritical8688]

For Story 3, I’d say NTA. As rSlash said, it was a public place, meaning OP has just as much of a right to have her picnic near the lake. The couple could have definitely been more patient, too.

[@slytherinlibrarian3501]

Not only that, they refused to share the space. They wanted OP to pack up her meal and leave. OP didn't seem to be against sharing the space so much as she was against being made to pack up and leave it.

[@ShelbyZealand]

Agreed. The photographer could have set up so they did the proposal and OP wasn't even in the shot. Or, you know... Photoshop. OP NTA, other people 2/5 As.

[@vickiechandler3112]

i agree...she was there first. , and it wasnt like the proposal was a surprise from the sound of it...unless they always have a photographer following them around..lol..........she was eating her meal...asking her to pack everything up and go somewhere else was rude. ...telling intead of asking (how long she would be and explaning why) by the photog shows huge entitlement and a ton of unprofessional manner. i would have said the same thing...if i'm eating dont bug me and the more you do the longer it will take me .. .sorry r/slash you are wrong on this...OP 0/5 ....photog 4/5.....couple 3/5 .. dont expect others to cater to your whims in a public area....sounds like it was a huge park area...have a backup plan. "oh excuse me mr. bear, you need to gtfo, i need to propose" at the very least a good photographer would have found a way to still take the pics and edit out . The fact he came up first before the couple says there was a chance they knew someone may have been there

[@ThePirateprincess23]

I work in education and even had one student move out of the district half way through the year but his parents paid to keep their student in my classroom for the rest of the school year. It could be possible that the parents were paying to keep their kids at the school they were used to, especially since one of them is special needs and may not adjust well to the change in schools.

[@DarkOsprey28]

Story 3: Bit snippy towards the OP there rslash. Main character? Sacred ritual? Tf man, she was just eating lunch! You know photo editing software is a thing, right? The “loving couple” could’ve still had their photo taken, and then the photographer could’ve just edited OP out of the bloody picture. And if they didn’t want to do that, they just could’ve waited instead of throwing a bitch fit.

[@d.phantomfan1216]

Story 3: I'm going to have to disagree on that one, it's first-come first-serve yes OP could have moved for them but he didn't have to and he was eating. Wasn't that I was getting dark and that's why they couldn't wait? Was that spot only big enough for one person? It feels like there should have been enough room for everyone to share, or was it that you being the shot too if they did just go on with you right their? Either way you don't get to go up to strangers and the man they pack up and get going so you can have your moment.

[@strangelic4234]

Agree. "It's a shared space, so you should have moved" ... how does that make sense?

[@dinlupus3196]

and she says that op ruin the day, but he didn't have to propose in the other place, why he didn't wait another day is not like she know it?, did the girlfriend knew about the proposal? why you will tell you lover that you are going to propose? is better if it is a surprise

[@FigmentForever]

Story 1: I’m with OP. Story 2: I’m also with OP. It’s a public space & if they truly wanted a perfect spot for the proposal, they should have gotten their first 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m so tired of people using “but I had this planned where you are so YOU NEED to move” when it’s a public space or even a spot in a restaurant. We’ve had people come up to our table while we were halfway through our meal to ask us to hurry because their kid was “hungry” and we should accommodate them. We told server what was going on, she told us to stay as long as we want, left her a huge tip, and the family ended up leaving 😂

[@resterAnonyme]

5th story, you are culturally Japanese and that is your name! You are 100% right! Culture makes a person not blood. You have more Japanese culturally then my son. My son is dual national Japanese/American and has lived in Japan for less that 2 of his 14 years. He has a Japanese middle name, but usually goes by his more American first name, but he is Japanese too!

[@truevoidchaos5980]

I’ll go ahead and say that Luffy is a great pet name, and that’s probably as far as it should go

[@Tustin2121]

Proposal story (3): RSlash is only right that it’s giving “I’m the main character” vibes FROM THE COUPLE! OP is NTA. They could have waited instead of thrown a hissy fit. They could have moved slightly to the left too. Just because two people are making a public display of vowing to only bone each other does not give them the right to just kick other people out of public spaces.

[@HobieInTheBox]

Story 3: Yes, it's a public space, OP does have a right be there, doesn't mean they have to get up from their meal. And if anyone has main character syndrome, it's the engaged couple that still felt the need to yell at OP after the fact, especially the woman who shouted directly at them. If you wanna propose publicly so badly (main character behaviour) you have to deal with the fact that people are EVERYWHERE. it's their problem. NTA

[@doomdrake123]

This.

[@juliaboskamp9666]

Those two will be a bridezilla and a groomzilla

[@HobieInTheBox]

​@@juliaboskamp9666deadass lol

[@anthonyrowlodge5357]

​@@juliaboskamp9666I wouldn't be surprised if there was an "entry" fee for all the guests that was no less than $250 plus a $250+ wedding gift. That couple are the same type of people who expect everyone at the beach to leave so she can have the "perfect" wedding photos and videos

[@pkking7456]

In my opinion, someone who has 2 japanese parents but was born and raised in the United States is not "Japanese" but rather "Of Japanese decent."

[@YukiteruAmano92]

Third story, when he got to the conclusion and said 'The whole story is giving "I'm the main character vibes"' I was thinking 'Yes, that couple *were* incredibly self entitled for expecting OP to move so they could have the occupied spot!' Then he swerved so hard I got whiplash! It's rare that I so *completely* disagree with rSlash on things (I regularly disagree a little but it's probably only half a dozen times, in all the time I've listened to him, that I've disagreed to *this* extent!) I cannot fathom, how rSlash thinks these strangers' perfect proposal plans in a public place should be OP's responsibility to accommodate!

[@maieen2665]

*First OP:* Maisie just wants her son to have some character development! 😛 Seriously, Luffy could be the son's nickname, but not his government name. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: giving your kids awful names is secondary child abu5e because their peers _will_ bully them for it. OP is NTA, nor is her BIL. *Second OP:* It looks like two parents wanting their kids to receive the best education, but one family got screwed over. I don't know the school protocol, but I don't think it was necessary to identify OP as the one who made the call. Other than that, I'd say N.A.H. *Third OP:* Would OP let the guy propose on that spot if they hadn't set up for their meal? If so, then OP is NTA. If not, then ESH. I can't explain my reasoning; it's just how I feel. *Fourth OP:* If OP & co. warned their sister that her daughter would cut them off, and she didn't listen, then that's on her. OP is NTA. It's interesting that OP's BIL wasn't surprised by the outcome. Did he _not_ want to be in his daughter's life? :/ *Fifth OP:* Looks like Claudia Kishi (Shoutouts to those who get the reference) learned about the FAFO principle. OP is NTA. *Sixth OP:* From the title alone, OP is NTA.

[@Tekashi117]

Hey quick correction. So even though Luffy's name is Monkey D Luffy, the naming scheme in japan is [Family name] [Given name], so Monkey is basically his last name in our culture. Thats why his dad and granpa also share the Monkey name

[@PinkDappleleaf]

The japanese story reminded me of a clip i saw of an interview with a guy who both his parents were English, but he was born and raised in Japan. He was even better at pronounching japanese then english, but he said he was always hesitent to call himself japanese because ethnically he wasn't

[@Shaaydiia07]

I find it so stupid how the definition of your ethnicity has changed because of insensitive twitter users. Your ethnicity is created from where you are born and raised and the culture you grew up with, race is a complete different thing.

[@Cantfi]

​@@Shaaydiia07You're mixing up ethnicity and nationality a bit, but I agree with you.

[@Shaaydiia07]

@@Cantfi am I?? I searched it up on google to make sure I was mentioning the right thing so if I did mix them up I blame it not the search engine 💀😂👉

[@caseaman2674]

I'm mexican, and about the story of the Japanese girl, I believe a person who had live in Japan, or any country if that matters, is more that nationality than someone claiming they have that "blood" in them. I always have find extremely weird how some Americans have these weird obsession with genetics and descendance. We are a mix of literally everything, so there is not a "race" of mexican anymore. So it's extremely annoying for some american to claim they are more mexican (or latino, if it matters) when they NEVER lived on the country nor experienced the culture. Even first generations born with parents from here, you will interact with kids, schools and everything american.

[@Cypresssina]

Right!? My ancestors were Irish/Scottish and Italian. I'm an American. Doesn't mean I don't find those histories a bit more dear to my heart. Doesn't mean I haven't made an effort to learn the languages. Still doesn't change the fact that I'm American.

[@BigBadWolfParty]

The real sucky thing about story two is that if the school found out they have full rights to kick the kids out of that school for being in a different district than the school zone. So even if OP hadn't said anything, it would of happened one way or another. It just sucks that no matter what, the one son would suffer the most from this.

[@DaftnPunk]

Not really. I went to school in a different district for 4 years before I moved out of state because my dad didn't want me in schools in my district. It's possible if you talk to people.

[@rambo1991]

Story 3: They were not going to do a proposal, they were going to do a photoshoot of a proposal that all parties knew about. It's all fake, fake people doing fake reactions. And instead of just hiring a studio, they want to take the public space for themselves. You are right about the 'main character' vibes, but these vibes come from the 'happy couple'. They think of themselves as the main characters.

[@scott8572]

5:50 imagine getting proposed to, but saying that it got “ruined” because the proposal happened 100 meters away from the originally planned spot. Everyone does suck that story, but I just can’t believe the bride couldn’t focus on the positive because of one small detail like that

[@MetaDragoon]

Clearly more concerned with the optics amd pictures than thw substance of their upcoming vows. Two less ultra entitled and shallow folks to end up dating!! xD

[@reezgaming1475]

No op isn’t in the wrong here It’s first come first serve Their pour planing does not constitute an emergency for op The couple should have had something in place before hand to reserve the spot To walk up to someone minding their own business and eating and tell them they need to move because “what I’m doing is more important than what your doing” is just crazy Op is not the AH And in all honesty I would have reacted the same way Idc if it’s family photos, marriage proposal If I’m already in an open spot doing something I gone have to wait until I’m done

[@rhawensilvr9725]

@@reezgaming1475I agree so much, how hard would it have been to have a fourth person staking out the spot? Or to have the camera man book it up there after a few candid walking shots? Honestly how many photos of you two hiking do you need before you do the actual kneel and ring act?

[@vickiechandler3112]

@@reezgaming1475 always have a backup plan.....i would have loved to see the groom tell a wild animal like a bear or cougar to gtfo ...would not have ended well....lol and yeah, im going eat slow as molasses when they got overly rude...need to chew each bite 20 times for good digestion...lol

[@reezgaming1475]

@@vickiechandler3112 fr That’s just entitlement at that point

[@CaptainTom_EW]

Story 3: NTA Your proposal isn't anyone else's problem Didn't they think "oh I'm going to propose at a public place, other people might be there!" OP just set the table and was in the middle of eating, it's common sense that you wouldn't disturb them

[@EmporerDragon]

While I do want to give my hypothetical future kids nerdy names, I also understand the cringe and bullying potential. So, I'd want to give them an "out", so to speak. Like, I'd love to name a daughter Lucina and a son Zefram, but those could easily be turned into Lucy and Zach respectively.

[@Aarbitraary]

I actually disagree with you on story 3. She had already gotten set up and was set to have an hour long meal. It does not feel like a "main character syndrome"... If he *really* wanted to reserve that spot for a proposal, they would have done the proper steps to get it. OP literally got there first, was already set up and actively eating. Not to mention, they were all rude about it afterwards. If he really wanted to propose to her at that very spot, shouldn't the boyfriend have improvised? Like take a romantic walk with a detour that hopefully winds back to that spot on the lake. I personally think OP was entitled to have her meal after already being set up. The couple and photographer did not need to be rude to OP. I also dont believe the couple would have been "only five minutes".

[@vickiechandler3112]

right? they were doing a photo shoot about the proposal not a proposal itself. who hangs out with a photog in the woods without knowing in advance what is going on,