Ranking Brooklyn 99's Captains From Meanest To Kindest | Brooklyn Nine-Nine

[@NBCBrooklyn99]

Do you agree with our ranking?

[@arecaceae]

nooo vulture is the best. I always loved his scenes

[@lermajerms]

@@arecaceaebut imagine having to work with him. now THAT would be awful.

[@pinkyhodgkins2185]

Someone needs to print the Holt mentor binder, I would buy that! 😂

[@ran52475]

Usually KZbin rankings muck it up, but this is actually pretty much accurate all the way through

[@augustoeremita7940]

only disagree on Dozerman, at least he's somewhat competent (even if it's through meaningless efficiency)

[@babyvia6712]

Miss Kim was the BEST (of the Holt replacements). Such a sweetheart omg.

[@ailialo]

I hate that episode tbh. Jake and Holt were awful and I feel so sad for her :(

[@pforgottonsoul]

@@ailialo i mean i don't blame holt and jake for being suspicious after having so many terrible captains but it is a shame she was the one that was actually genuinely good.

[@user-nr3vg2xh6l]

But I heard she pops pills

[@davidrichter3681]

I like when Holt called her a "stupid b". Classic sassy Holt.

[@Moonbeam3575]

Cap Jeffords

[@stephieirene1]

Captain Kim needed more of a chance, but the way the detectives ran her out was pretty accurate.

[@Kitty-d6k]

I'm just a little sad that none of them ended up properly apologize to her, she was such a sweetheart! I do get she's the way of showing how the detectives are ptsd to all the horrible captain, she's too good to be true and also shows how much they love captain holt, hope it was wrapped up better.

[@mandong1389]

I'd like Kim more than Holt sometimes but she really didn't deserve that :(

[@yohanedescends4683]

yeah i wish she was a captain for a few more episodes. very nice and likeable

[@Kashis_Corner]

I didn't get that far, what happened to her? She seems so lovely.

[@SoLMoneyTree]

​@@Kashis_Cornerif I remember correctly, she choose to move to another station at the same ep. Even only appear 1 episode but I like her a lot. Sad because her roles ending so quick

[@fishcakestheumbrella1329]

"Why is no one having a good time? I specifically requested it." Underrated line

[@dokusalis197]

So true 😂😂😂😂

[@brianmetet5545]

It's a meme now

[@uniformsyter927]

I like that Seth’s final words could have been “get back to work”

[@doctorsuave]

I think “tell my life I loved her…work ethic” was the perfect line to go out on

[@andrewkomaniecki480]

Seth was not a bad captain

[@dylankrejci9965]

@@andrewkomaniecki480sure, cuz screaming at your detectives to work faster, under threat of being called a failure, that’s a really healthy work environment

[@user-lu9il2qv5s]

​@@dylankrejci9965snowflake 😂

[@biggiracc]

​@@dylankrejci9965sounds like school

[@NeddyMontz]

5:33 "Tell my wife... that I lover her... work ethic..." 💀🤣

[@stargirl91291]

How are there so many likes on a grammatically incorrect statement…

[@Axe_Cian]

Ur a shallow person

[@reinierwalraven5885]

Captain Holt is obviously the best one but Captain Kim could've been legendary as well. It's probably one of the most accurate things about the whole show. She was absolutely perfect but because the whole squad were already so connected with each other they all thought of ways in which case Kim would be bad for their precinct.....and then of course Jake sneaking around her bedroom and letting the dog out wasn't the best move😂

[@dhanrajshetty5161]

Captian Kim = Holt's Wisdom + Terry's Wholesomeness + Santiago's Charm.

[@littlelove13]

Let’s be real, everybody knows Holt is the best

[@user-sv5kt8qz3v]

lies, their OG captain bfor holt is better

[@mrgrimreaper3404]

​@@user-sv5kt8qz3vD1 hater cuz everyone knows holt is the best

[@corryburton9834]

I disagree

[@BeckettWells-t8f]

Agree

[@blametl4921]

Vulture is technically best he probably actually did make there precinct tge best one in Brooklyn

[@Iraguy]

“Eek… oh this is a heart attack. this right here, this is a heart attack. oo it’s a big one, oo oo oo.” God I love how he undermines the pain of heart attacks like he experiences them on a daily basis. Which he probably does.

[@mayeryncarty4795]

Holt was a father , mentor , protector and supporter of his squad including the times they showed he is a godfather for the child of one of the uniformed officers proving he goes above and beyond for ALL his squad

[@ezmoney4598]

When CJ is telling the story of how he became a captain, he never said that he was in the force before he got the title. There’s nothing anyone can say to convince me that he was unemployed before getting to be a police captain.

[@itsthejavavoid]

tbh i fully assumed that he was unemployed 😂

[@MegaKnight2012]

He did spend nine years at the police academy (a six-month program)

[@dirtyharry0191]

@@MegaKnight2012 It honsetly should be nine-year program irl

[@deejeh9494]

​@dirtyharry0191 if police were trained for 9 years, they'd be better than many military, and I'm all for it.

[@Jm-np2cw]

RIP Cpt. Holt 👮🏿‍♂️ Thank you for everything you did for us Mr. Andre Keith Braugher You served more people in more ways than you could ever imagine

[@matthewshanpru2682]

He died??

[@aundreanaphiffer3572]

Yes lung cancer

[@devzeppalin]

@@matthewshanpru2682The actor not Captain Holt.

[@joost00555]

I guess CJ never actively tried to destroy the 99, that is his redemption.

[@evanblake5252]

CJ had no qualifications or competency, we all know that, but he was a decent person. He was kind, and friendly. He liked people, and he did no harm (intentionally anyway), and it showed.

[@mazdakmina9493]

Also he cared *the bare minimum* about people, which redeems him slightly above Dozerman - who (I just noticed) literally *said* "I have no use for people," which in addition caused him to act *very* weird when people were "inefficient" in *any* way (laughing hysterically when Santiago didn't know how many calories the walk from the elevator burned - lol - or shouting and threatening to end Peralta and Santiago's careers all for "lacking efficiency" because they were "having a moment" together), meant he cared so little about *himself* that he got *himself* killed by *heart attack* in his *office* due to overworking himself (even after he knew he was about to do so - he gave himself a heart attack seconds after walking in, then changed *nothing)!* Yes, CJ is "redeemed" above Dozerman because he cared "enough" (read: *at all)* about humans, including *himself,* to *not* do *that!* XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD

[@SC-RGX7]

"Am fairly certain that's a dog" "It was dark"

[@assassingod2004]

I'm*

[@edwinpineda3837]

It catches me off guard every time LOL

[@MikeMJPMUNCH]

4:43 I love the bit where Dozerman hits the timer on his ipad and then bolts it out of the room.

[@muchiramurage4815]

Yeah man😂

[@merindhital9074]

Exactly That's so Sheldon Cooper

[@jyoungsr]

Rosa: "Like it?" Holt: "Not at all." Rosa: "You can leave." Holt: " Not a chance." The man was a true gem.

[@cruachan1191]

"Gots to have my puks." "Gots to!" The little nod that accompanies that makes it even funnier. We're due for a new best of The Vulture compilation!

[@drams8710]

I’m so emotional to see terry as captain finally❤😢

[@anne_trnh]

terry did though

[@floodlitworld]

Sarge becomes Loot becomes Capn

[@anne_trnh]

@@floodlitworld amd at the end of the series they call him "captain jeffords"

[@ClassifiedRanTom]

This should be titled Ranking Brooklyn 99's Captains From Worst to Holt.

[@theo_2949]

Class idea

[@allanorme2093]

The Vulture to Holt

[@DudePeefect69420]

Same vibes as “From Ray to Z”

[@AtomicSub]

From Ray to Z

[@flamingRose100]

went -chaotic evil -lawful evil -benign evil -non existent -YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOM! -daddy

[@LordBloodraven]

Deny it all you want. Kim was the mom we all wish we had.

[@iainkilcar7463]

@@LordBloodravenshe was like a stepmom that was actually a perfect mom but got rejected despite the fact that she was pretty much perfect

[@george6397]

You call CJ evil? He was one of the nicest people in the show, he was just really dumb

[@flamingRose100]

@@george6397 yeah he's evil he taking away a job from someone far more qualified his job is something that can cost people their lives he's diverting thousands of dollars every year just to fill his pockets and he knows what he's doing is wrong and he did not earn his position and that he should step down but he doesn't and he won't cj is evil

[@mrigakshi0902]

I'd put Dozerman after CJ😂 at least he could wear his own uniform!

[@jopalm3649]

And it's Bill effing Hader.

[@Bubaiel]

Yeah and Dozerman actually cared even if his methods were terrible

[@drumedorable]

Yeah, but it is not a list about being competent, it is about being kind.

[@devil1994]

Vulture was the worst captain Second is CJ Dozerman is actually getting more negative than he deserves. He wanted to do something good for the police compared to those two.

[@marlon7826]

Doesnt matter, Dozerman is a maniac

[@chronotempestus6590]

Eh, I'd much rather have CJ as a boss than Dozerman.

[@devil1994]

@@chronotempestus6590 CJ is good if the workplace has nothing to do. True he is easy to deal with but he is practically a useless captain with no responsibility, no credibility and simply no brain. Nobody will go a police station where a captain like CJ works.

[@yakobsoulstorm5187]

@@chronotempestus6590 I'd rather have Dozerman in charge of running the only thing that stops murders.

[@Libellulaire]

Wanting to something good is all nice but when you're an abusive jerk it doesn't really matter. The guy was disrespectful, rude, insulting, he didn't consider any of the employees as humans (heck, he doesn't even care about humans), he didn't treat anybody decently, he wanted to essentially make everybody work to death like he did to himself. And by the way, he didn't even want "to do good," he just wanted to be as optimal as possible, to "win" as much as possible. He didn't actually care about doing something good for society. So even morally he's not up there. He was a terrible human being and a terrible boss. CJ is useless and a total moron, but at least he wasn't a terrible person, he didn't mistreat anybody.

[@sjoerdderks4731]

Who let C.J became captain? or even a cop to begin with.

[@danidoesmusic]

Have you watched the show

[@iambiggus]

Well, he went to the wrong address because numbers are weird and then he tripped a major drug kingpin etc etc.

[@sjoerdderks4731]

@@danidoesmusic yes, the question is who?

[@danidoesmusic]

@@sjoerdderks4731 his superiors and the board, he arrested a major drug kingpin (by accident) and got accolades

[@MCSPARTAN501]

He was unusually lucky and managed to take down some important criminals by accident

[@Druid.Consulting]

“Why is no one having a good time, I specifically requested it.” Freaking killed me 🎉😂

[@mungus82]

Don't die

[@jakehart-kirby5401]

"do you know why Boyle doesn't slump?" "Because his whole life is a slump?"

[@uniformsyter927]

“Why is no one having a good time I specially requested it”

[@mazdakmina9493]

2:53 You can see the part of his thumb that's missing on his left hand. A terrifying fact. The actor that plays the Vulture actually had to get part of his thumb and two of his toes amputated due to a bacterial infection that nearly killed him! 😱😱😱 He literally can't walk without feeling pain (which is insane, because he's running in so many scenes - not to mention the AllState ads where he does all those stunts)! 😭😭😭 But yes, that's why his left hand is always hidden or covered.

[@cmdrjanjalani]

Dozerman might be better than CJ depending on the circumstances. For the 99 though, CJ's aversion to micromanage is fine as most of the cops seem to be doing their jobs fine. If the precinct has more Hitchcocks and Scullys, a Dozerman might be needed.

[@chriskamara4522]

The fact that cj singing " you have the right to remain silent, come on and party tonight"want in here is a serious crime

[@sunnyM42]

i wish kim had stayed for at least half a season or more. she was nice and could've fit in well

[@Marcelis]

I gotta stop watching these, I’m spoiling myself

[@Nir7r0us0xide]

Something the Vulture got wrong is that the sai is a blunt weapon, its not used for stabbing. Like you can definitely poke someone with it but to call it stabbing feels wrong

[@EthanDarke]

😆 I was half expecting Peralta to call him out on that

[@mazdakmina9493]

LOL It's the Vulture. He's wrong about so many things! It's completely accurate that he'd get that wrong! 😂😂😂

[@Icarsilva]

Dozerman is literally Dwight Schrute as 99’s captain 😅🤪

[@aditrievarshney]

Omgg that's exactly what I thought.

[@schizophrenicandroid]

Does that make CJ the Michael Scott?

[@aditrievarshney]

@@schizophrenicandroid Fss, but maybe a tad bit worse.

[@allanorme2093]

​@@aditrievarshney I could see Micheal losing a bag of Cocaine and Dwight helping him find it leading to a drug bust

[@리아-b9g]

Especially when he says question

[@kaol.n]

Still mad about 99 phasing out captain kim. It was badly handled

[@vource2670]

No

[@TQM]

Yeah I thought it was a bit too abrupt too. Wish they could've found a way to keep her around for occasional appearances.

[@vyrolious9609]

I hated the captain kim episode because it would have been so sick for her to be their captain for a bit but thematically I understand why the episode was necessary and why jake and holt acted like they did

[@allisoncastle]

Poor captain Kim:(

[@It4int0ver]

„I’m having a heartattack. Yes, I’m heaving a heartattack. Get back to work!“ -> Seth

[@glitterlich]

RIP Andre Braugher, you were such a fantastic actor

[@TheyCallMeNewb]

8:12 Finally! The axiomatic funniest scene in the entire series. How has it taken this channel so long to upload this scene here as a whole. They're a lot of dogs out here, right on top of each other. Seems fishy.

[@deeuphrosyne]

Dozerman is annoying but he got the detectives done their job and become more productive (in the wrong way), but CJ is worse than him because he don’t deserve not only become a captain but also as a cop

[@RedRebel008]

No matter what anyone says, The scene where Holt gets Huffy is the best scene in the entirety of Brooklyn 99, He said what every person, Officer, Detective or any law official must know and stand by, I would have loved if that scene was here.

[@madunwagbo4769]

A video like this actually makes me realise just how many captains the 9-9 had in the course of the show

[@therealsapdad1942]

Yes, i believe thats the point

[@TheMegaCTTV]

There is simply no question, Holt. Period. Miss ya goat

[@thesnowmexican763]

"Never vacation in Banff" This was the moment I began to believe every word he ever said.

[@CoastPropertyBuyers]

CJ was definitely the vaguest and funniest! Missed his stupidity when he left! 😂

[@dbzocchi]

This video should be called "Ranking Brooklyn 99's Captains From Worst To Holt"

[@ivorladia]

A reunion will never be complete.

[@wahn10]

The last 5 minutes of this got me a little emotional. No one comes close to Captain Holt.

[@calebsoria1901]

11:59 Now that is a good captain since she’s cool, has crazy connections, and is organized.

[@Ijiko]

honestly dozerman and cj are equals to me. they're the exact opposite and i hate both sides to be a captain

[@calebsoria1901]

Captain holt the greatest captain to ever lived. He was tough, caring, and loved his squad. Andre was one of the best actors ever in this show and he left one heck of a mark. You’ll never be forgotten l.

[@profpoké1]

The vulture is just too good at being evil? I love him

[@saoirsedeltufo7436]

Bill Hader's "EYYYY" is amazing

[@crime5907]

Captain Kim deserved so much better in the show but it makes sense why she didn’t

[@tejpersonal9945]

captain dad is the best

[@375-Productions]

Dadptain!

[@Nathan_Bowker]

Captain Holt always spoke like a true Captain😢 Edit: Captain's Seth's final words were literally work ethic-

[@holly22972]

CJ is arguably the most incompetent captain, however I absolutely love how Ken Marino played that character😂 He was the funniest Holt replacement for sure

[@kuteken6312]

CJ being the 99th captain is the equivalent of Creed becoming Dunder Mifflin's manager... a total wild card.

[@Ascaron1337]

"You like it?" "Not at all." "You can leave." "Not. A. Chance." Friendship in a nutshell.

[@kingolo97]

0:37 Terry leaning on the podium like he knows how screwed they are 😂

[@Wolfshifter]

“Eggs for breakfast? Further behind than I thought.” For some reason, my favorite line in the entire show right now.

[@laszorras813]

I ACTUALLY LOVE CJ. HE IS SO CUTE

[@aj1412]

@2:42 Sanchez deserved a promotion for this dramatic pause😂

[@Chris-ks4sw]

Dozerman isnt bad. He just wants everything to be efficient. The vulture and CJ are much worse

[@camnunes8847]

Atleast with Dozerman he wanted work to get done, unlike CJ who straight up compromised a major drug case by losing a whole bag of coke

[@yakobsoulstorm5187]

Dozerman was kinda abusive in the way he raised his voice, and piled absurd expectations onto his employees. He admits this at the very beginning "I've made promises to my superiors that I almost certainly cannot keep". Dude's not evil but he was really lacking in terms of emotional intelligence.

[@natesvideos7339]

Seth Dozerman is the Dwight Schrute of Brooklyn 99

[@shantalash5715]

And CJ is like the Michael Scott of b99

[@LemonViper00]

Every time I see the vulture I think of “what’s up dummy” from 30 rock.

[@jasonulriksen8897]

Honestly would have loved her to just appear occasionally throughout the show as just the most perfect person. Always super funny and nice and amazing and an amazing cop. And maybe everyone acknowledges that she’s so perfect but not in a bad way and more in a funny way.

[@smashingairguitars]

"why is no one having a good time? I specifically requested it" bruhhhh 😂🤣😂🤣💀💀

[@krisgraves9115]

17:59 "Rosa..." HOLT SOUNDS SO BETRAYED AND SAD ABOUT HIS BAGEL

[@jaredhiner8817]

0:39 "So get All-State, and be protected from mayhem, like me"

[@sammiepittman3130]

“Boom i’ve already established my authority through my amazing sense of humor” 😂

[@harryeast95]

If the order is meanest to kindest, I'd go: Vulture (cruel) -> Dozerman (mean) -> McGintley (neutral) -> Holt (generally kind, occasionally petty, cruel and manipulative) -> Terry -> CJ -> Kim

[@NavGTI]

I never quite got Seth Dozerman when I first watched B99 but knowing Bill Hader's comedy it all makes sense now 😂

[@stevenn3052]

I like that Captain Kim speaks to Hitchcock and Scully as "Michael and Norm."

[@sammiepittman3130]

I busted out laughing when Captain Kim told Jake dj thought he’d be a good fit as a police liaison for the FBI. Like they really ran her out for nothing. Under Holt she really was the best 😂

[@calebsoria1901]

15:17 Terry loves being captain

[@arvin7509]

17:04 still hits hard

[@JoabEliotG]

Knowing there won't be a reboot in the future sucks... We miss you Andre...

[@BeckyM2000]

I agree that the vulture and CJ as the worst captains and Jeffords and Holt as the best captains😊

[@m1t2a1]

A bowline is a very useful knot. 16:35 Can' blame him. Next would be reef.

[@steady_94]

Great selection of clips for each captain.

[@deepakganesan9327]

19:46 if the mentorship is 9 years long, day 3300 wouldnt exist, since 9 years is only about 3287 days. 3300 is nearly two weeks after the mentorship ended.

[@MirandolinaAmaldin]

Which makes perfect sense and also shows that true mentorship doesn't have a fixed endpoint. 😊

[@Binnieishere]

Why is 4:22 low key hilarious? I can't stop replaying it. LOL

[@thejordanchronicles6715]

‘But wasn’t there like an interview, where they met you… and heard you speak?…’ ‘Presumably’ 🤣🤣🤣

[@tooslow2react342]

Rosa, "IDK, meet at a bar and... ... ... ... ... ... drink there?"

[@adavanja5682]

17:11 whoever came up with this part, I love you! 💓

[@AutumnOnFire]

Just as trivia, the actress for Captain Kim was one of the students in House's 3 stories.

[@eyedeasneverdie3348]

Every line from The Vulture is comedy gold, I just cant bring myself to hate him. Wish we got more of CJ with Hitchcock + Scully

[@tonykinyua4793]

"You only get one shot at your brothers widow", over to you mythbusters

[@kh_167]

"Okay Muchacoooos!!! Let's roll up on these muchachooos!!!" ~C.J.

[@en-peiliu1714]

The best is Holt, the worst is the Vulture. Others are debatable.

[@KeithSpinneyMusic]

RIP Capt Holt(Andre Braugher)!

[@sallyadams7666]

🥺 RIP Captain

[@mythribg3349]

We all need a Capt Holt in our life

[@stereokuuji]

16:53 Atleast now I know where someone was between 2010 and 2014

[@legendarypo183]

R.I.P Captain Raymond Holt….🙏

[@elabryth]

I miss Andre Braugher as if he were actually family. R.I.P.

[@XavierBlackburn777]

All of B99’s captains. RIP Holt

[@ChiWithZ]

I am here for everyone except number 1

[@ChiWithZ]

Because I know who's number 1

[@noahacha459]

"Women love planning Parties its in the Bible" xD

[@jackm1040]

The vulture seems like an alternate where Tommy died instead of Johnny especially considered the brothers widow thing