The Rise and Fall of the Yaoi Paddle (Version 2)

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The first (and now out-dated) yaoi paddle video I made:
• The Rise and Fall of t...
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Thanks to Sonic Legaspi for the Yaoi Con footage! Go check out his channel here (there's lots of great cosplay videos!)
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Thanks to my lovely volunteer voice actors, Greg and Dan:
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Thanks to @_seaPancake for doing the art in my thumbnail and end card! Check out more of her work here:
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Thumbnail layout by @OGmagicalgirl
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#yaoipaddle

[@mogxmoogle]

Being a gay male cosplayer during that time period, the yaoi paddle was the worst. During the height of the yaoi paddle I was like 15-17 being assaulted by mid 30s women and girls my own age. I almost left a con early because I had been struck so many times I had bruises. I do not miss this

[@deadline9888]

Damn that sucks, Ive never been a con goer but I can remember videos from that time of girls reacting to "real male" cosplayers where they would grab at the dudes chest and just generally touch them with zero permission. Looking back at it as a trans guy makes it even worse

[@_timelordrose_8401]

when i identified as a trans man, i had fujoshis in my middle school who would ship me with male friends and call it yaoi- anime fangirls treat men so shittily honestly

[@mogxmoogle]

@Ideally that's one of the reasons why cosplay is not consent is a great thing!

[@NareKech]

@Ooohbopbopboppadoohwah well I mean you can say that they would look cute together and stuff, I think that's fine, but when things get sexual that's just creepy

[@dilaisy_loone2846]

BemyJoy that exactly the problem. I like yaoi and yuri a lot, but is sick the amount of people who fetishize ships of real people (cosplayers, actors and band boys). I hate Wattpad just for that

[@merrittanimation7721]

Remember guys: Cosplay is not consent.

[@roflgirlxxx]

Corvo@AZ That’s not an excuse to touch someone without their permission

[@gliscorpropagandaaccount1764]

@@roflgirlxxx especially someone you don't know

[@artsyscrub3226]

@Corvo@AZ if a fangirl touches me without permission there will be a fist in someone's face. I hate being touched by strangers, I haven't had terrible experiences but strangers touching me triggers me alot and i WILL not afford any kindness to anyone who does that shit to me.

[@kawaiidere1023]

I’m taking photos unless a sign/poster/cosplayer/convention says otherwise

[@carsfan1995]

Corvo@AZ That is still not an excuse and what you're condoning is non-consensual acts of touching. Quit making excuses on why they do it and actually give sympathy to the victims.

[@kiss-shot_is_bae]

The lost box of Yaoi paddles is the anime equivalent to the E.T games burried in the dessert.

[@thuranz2773]

I'd describe it more as sealed evil in a can myself.

[@Radien]

☝🏻Both of these things can simultaneously be true.

[@TheMichigami]

except that they eventually found the atari cartridges in the desert, and donated and sold a bunch of em to museums and collectors and made documentaries about finding em. the paddles are probably best left lost if they exist.

[@erebuspanda4653]

@@TheMichigami If the paddles were found I'd honestly expect a documentary

[@hoonterofhoonters6588]

That lost bag is an SCP at this point.

[@Weebslayer13]

"glomping" just triggered my flight or fight lmao

[@erebuspanda4653]

I almost RAN from my desk ad the thought of glomping lol

[@Weebslayer13]

@@erebuspanda4653 lmfaoo right it felt like war flashbacks I stg 😭

[@dr.jackbright963]

*stares in Vietnam flash back*

[@erebuspanda4653]

@@Weebslayer13 It is thoughhhh! Like some memory my brain tried to forget lmfao!

[@fleur4516]

I been to school with active anima fans and they dont hug oh noo they GLOMP the living daylights out of you when they see you out of their club

[@victorprojects6715]

Yaoi Paddle Rebuild 2.0: You Will (Not) Harass

[@merrittanimation7721]

I know, I know I've let you down. I've been a fool to myself...

[@halfiecafe]

... I thought that I could live for no one else

[@Homodemon]

@@halfiecafe ... But now, through all the hurt and pain...

[@jhaugsne]

@@Homodemon ...It's time for me to respect...

[@HugoPegler]

It all comes tumbling down Tumbling down Tumbling do~wn

[@JustADioWhosAHeroForFun]

Can't wait to stir my canoe with a _Yaoi Paddle_

[@RescueRapscall2]

My friend he's making soup

[@getango]

Your canoe? Or your ship? ;)

[@reeses22]

Dio....stir? You're making soup....with a *Yaoi Paddle?*

[@woah9164]

@@reeses22 u can use your yaoi paddle to stir chili

[@nootnootfall9589]

Stir:)

[@cl3977]

"almost 20 years ago" oh the 80s "2002 to 2003" oh 0_0

[@RescueRapscall2]

Admit it we're old

[@miaugato93]

"20 years ago" _cool, the 1990s_ "In 2005" ..... _oh_

[@ibcheel9021]

Yep 1998 was not 10 years ago. Sigh...

[@Someonev]

I'm 21 (born in '99) and even I was like "ah yes, 20 years ago, 1995 :)" not even I can fully accept that for some reason...

[@flamestoyershadowkill6400]

@@Someonev I cant accept that 2010 was ten years ago

[@decembervyne6541]

I'm not even that old (20 yrs) but I was talking to my 17 yr old coworker who likes anime if he remembers glomping and he was like "...What's glomping?" Instantly aged me 10 years.

[@moonmoon11111]

Omg no ur comment is so cursed... I was like “can’t believe this!! I’m the same age as ur coworker and even *I* remember glomping” . I’m 20 in a couple of days.

[@monochromedream-eatingbaku]

Honestly if you're from a non-English country like me it might just be that he never heard of that word

[@emilymarley4505]

Oh God. I remember I used to message my friends and be like "GLOMP" because we thought it was like a normal hug. Wish I could warn myself not to 😅

[@worstusernameintheworld9871]

yikes, don't worry you're not that old because I used that term a lot before and I'm currently 17, i still use ironically for the laughs but it was a weird time before

[@Jaypupp]

Im 18, a weeb since I was 13 and the only reason I knew what glomping even was was bc of the fandom I was in;; it was older than most of the big hit animes at the time and now I thank God that I was just at the end of that window of glomping (TwT)

[@TiBunCosplay]

Red Bard: *mentions glomping* Me: *has flashbacks to when this tiny girl (she was about the size of a 12-14 year old but was 19 at the time) did a running-jump glomp on me and almost put us through a window.*

[@RedBardIsCool]

literally wHAT

[@scarlthesnarl5581]

Oh damn like a dude I sort of knew from college glomped me when we were on a balcony/catwalk thing and I almost threw him off of it because I didn't see him coming.

[@takahashierik]

Man imagine death by glomping

[@TheMichigami]

i still have a shirt in the back of a closet somewhere with "glomp me and DIE!!" written on it in big letters. i've walked with a cane for a long time and almost got knocked over maaaaaany times back in the day at cons by surprise glompers, including one who actually did a running scream down the hallway before tackling me from the side as i turned to see what the approaching noise was. not even someone i knew, just someone who liked my artwork and recognized me by the rainbow coat from afar and somehow decided that the best way to say hi was to introduce me to the con center carpet sideways at mach 10. o_0

[@minmayradio2310]

A Black*Star cosplayer did a running start jump glomp on me when I was cosplaying Tsubaki at Otakon that nearly punched my teeth out and almost knocked me onto the ceramic floor

[@Perosha]

“An academic paper from the year 2008 about the yaoi subculture” was not a thing I thought I’d hear about today

[@septumhyacinthe2053]

only Red Bard could make me watch another documentary about yaoi paddles. There's just something about that voice quality

[@carpethatdiem]

I like her enthusiasm (and her lisp) lol

[@septumhyacinthe2053]

@@carpethatdiem ikr, she makes anything sound so interesting

[@najadamu2724]

@@carpethatdiem I didn't even notice she had a lisp.

[@Radien]

Her narration is definitely a plus, but as someone who went to cons through this whole period, the biggest thing about the way she speaks is how she distinctly expresses the actual feelings of that period of time. As for her lisp, I'm not sure whether that's actually her, or an effect of the microphone or the audio mix. High tones can sometimes get lost in the recording and mixing process, and S (“ess”) is actually a very high-pitched sound. Long story short, recorded audio can accidentally produce a very convincing artificial lisp.

[@comettamer]

Very true.

[@TBA968]

"A published study on the yaoi subculture" Ah yes academia at its finest.

[@ultimatetadpole9607]

Imagine having to seriously research that. I think I'd rather write a thesis on Jimmy fucking Saville.

[@SteepInKline]

Believe it or not, there’s actually an entire anime studies subfield with a fair amount of research like that.

[@exquisitecorpse4917]

What was the last academic paper you read?

[@thuranz2773]

I've met guy who wrote an academic paper on Japanese Maid cafes. It would've been a lot of fun to write.

[@poproxycodone6409]

ok homestuck

[@ytoob_smorhc]

If cons were still going on, and Yaoi paddles came back, it would be another 2020 cursed item/event.

[@MrRuano825]

The Paddles will be why cons will remain canceled in 2021

[@MadameGraveheart]

ytoob_smorhc it was a cursed item when it was created. It would just become stronger if it came back.

[@kpossibles]

I think they're explicitly banned in most convention rules on weapons

[@thisistheaccountname]

Shush, don't give 2020 any ideas.

[@blehe38]

inb4 yaoi paddles make an ironic comeback that gets way too out of hand and someone actually does get paralyzed by a paddle while at a small get-together in a park in, oh i dont know, semi-rural new hampshire

[@paularobles5441]

Lmao imagine being a random dude that stole a random suitcase that was really heavy and when they opened it it's filled with yaoi paddles

[@platinumskulls4490]

That could make them some good cash if they sold it

[@paularobles5441]

@@platinumskulls4490 they'd have to find out what they are first 😂 it's not really common knowledge

[@holynarwhale8729]

Imagine taking it through an airport.

[@panqueque445]

You: Buys a yaoi paddle Me, an intellectual: Cosplays as a yaoi paddle

[@oliviatang198]

panqueque445 me: IS the Yaoi paddle

[@patrickracer43]

Modern problems require modern solutions

[@sinkeiyu96]

you're giving me a TERRIBLE idea

[@nameofthename]

i wonder, would you be told to leave a con if you actually did that?

[@panqueque445]

@@nameofthename Personally I wouldn't risk it. You're basically going out of your way to cosplay as something that's banned from the con. So I wouldn't be surprised if they thought you were there to try and provoke people or start trouble.

[@Yuri_Studio]

I'm impressed with the research you've done. I also want to stress that the paddles were also banned as signs, which was another trend that got way out of hand at the same time. What started as a cute thing, became a cottage industry and encouraged young people to act irresponsibly, inappropriately and sometimes, illegally. It became time consuming for cons to police people, so it was easier to ban signs and paddles.

[@mohammedsami6907]

What about the katanas, have there ever been any issues with thoses?

[@SecretIdentityStudio]

Ah, yes, the sign bans. It seemed silly on the outside, but "Free Hugs" tended to be used as an excuse to grope people and "Will Yaoi for Pocky" signs generally weren't kidding...

[@ladyinwight]

@@SecretIdentityStudio god bless

[@theoriginalsache]

@@mohammedsami6907 Mostly just with security and getting the katanas home if you flew. Most of the people who bought katanas knew better than to do anything more with them than show them off and most cons that allowed sword dealers had a policy that any bladed weapons bought on the premises be wrapped immediately. Now, Bokken, on the other hand...

[@exquisitecorpse4917]

@@mohammedsami6907 Most 13 year olds can't afford katanas ;)

[@SarahZ]

9:20 yaoi paddle subculture more like SUBculture am i right haha 👉🏻👉🏻 real talk though, this was a fantastic and well-researched video, thank you for making it!

[@cy-bernet-ix]

nice

[@Sam-on5jf]

when icons colide

[@MyAngela995]

Wow 2 of my favs

[@kalejuice5701]

Awesome to see you here!

[@sandwichmonster7067]

Subhumanculture

[@LieseFury]

i can't think of anything that more closely fits the definition of a cursed item than a bag full of yaoi paddles

[@user-es2df1xr1v]

lmaoooooo

[@lobstrosity7163]

Keter Class

[@vogonp4287]

@@lobstrosity7163 I do believe that it is contained for now.

[@killerbug05]

*a bag full*

[@ExtremeWreck]

I can think of one. A bag full of copies of unreleased Sega Saturn port of Bubsy 3D.

[@carolinewheeler77]

See this is why I think parents should be more involved with what their kids like. When I was 12 I went to my first con, and my mom was with me for the first part of it. I ran over to a cosplayer and gave them a hug, right after my mom was like “uhhhh hey maybe ask people before giving them hugs?” Then I got pretty embarrassed for acting stupid and always asked to give hugs and such after.

[@kidbuumajin7315]

That can be dangerous if parents were involved

[@DesireeEagle]

Good idea! Minors in general should be accompanied by parents or guardians. Even at cons!

[@Imgoingtohell-rd5sm]

you were 12 bro you should know better, you aren’t fucking 5

[@BadAnimeGroup]

There's a jilted weeb somewhere that's been planning the launch of Paddle-Con for over a decade.

[@DZrache]

Those already exist, they're called fetish markets.

[@Andyatl2002]

deviled_eggs, it’s the next damn con failure, the next Rainfurrest

[@Mouseymouse678]

There’s bdsm and fetish conventions so technically it’s already a thing,,

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Weeabloodbath

[@thanatoast]

Ah the early 2000's, i remember the first time i broke my leg because someone decided to "glomp" me. This entire century is cursed.

[@vanni6923]

that sounds absolutely horrific. 😬

[@jar-of-bees]

@@aimq3246 nope, the 21st century is a dumpster fire

[@ColumineMiette]

Don't you mean millennium?

[@nacnate]

did you sue

[@calzoneyyy]

thank god i was born in the mid 2000s so that i didn’t have to deal with this

[@thanatoast]

Broke: Yaoi paddle Woke: Yaoi sail Bespoke: Yaoi diesel engine.

[@petermccracken8447]

outboard yaoi motor

[@pseudohai9006]

BEHOLD: The Yaoi Submarine!

[@uilsoum875]

*rolls up on my yaoi boat* get in loser we’re going to sakura con

[@DarkLordFluffee]

Yaoi Isekai Car

[@imshook6565]

Fishing with my yaoi fishing rod :)

[@OktaviaVon]

Just thinking of the paddles and glomping again made me cringe so hard I remembered my gaia online password.

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Temporal knockback

[@totally.normal]

Jeez.

[@potmki6601]

Thank you for making me laugh

[@GirtheAlienGoldfish]

Someone once glomped me so hard while I was cosplaying as Yuffie that they broke my giant ninja star. I'm glad glomping and yaoi paddles are no loner a thing. A lot of people wound up getting hurt and their costumes ruined because of it.

[@patrickripleyiii134]

GirtheAlienGoldfish I really don't wanna know what glomping is

[@tinseltina]

@@patrickripleyiii134 it's a tackle-hug. sometimes very tight or non consensual

[@patrickripleyiii134]

Ah that's pretty not cool

[@Arcxzal]

@Himalayan Duck so basically a way to get punched if the person sees you coming at them?

[@artsyscrub3226]

@@Arcxzal Pretty much, it wasn't just exclusive to anime cons either, celebrities and youtubers often got glomped. I remember a KZbinr i watched begging his subscribers to NOT glomp him because someone hurt him trying. Because people can't seem to simple walk up to someone ask for a hug and a picture maybe talk a bit and leave.

[@the_chosen_one5642]

YAOI PADDLE IS OVER TIME FOR YURI OAR

[@samt3412]

TIME FOR NAKADASHI CANOE

[@SmegmaGoblin]

YOAR

[@cyberpilate]

I thought you said Yuri Car and I was ready to subscribe to your newsletter.

[@user-fq4hj8yv2z]

What world am I living in...?

[@oblivious8868]

@@user-fq4hj8yv2z One of big dreamers? For better and worse.

[@Alberich_Prince_of_Dwarves]

Y'know, I'm kinda happy that the yaoi paddle wasn't a thing in the danish anime con scene when I was in it..

[@linuxstreamer8910]

I'm happy that my first con was in 2018 so i never had to deal with it

[@the_monkey_lover]

Ora ora ora ora ora ora ora

[@AndyMandyBandy]

I happy that anime bonzai did not have yoai paddles. Also that my first con was 2018.

[@megamage911]

My first J-popcon was in 2009, so right around the time when it was really big xD

[@itspunishmenttime6325]

Yeah, same. My first con was in 2018 in Milan and I'm so happy no cosplayer (as far as I know) was harmed or harassed by those paddles

[@KidMangaX]

We NEED the "Glomping" video. This seemingly innocuous act was the bane of every male convention goer's existence, and kept a lot of young men from ever cosplaying or even going to cons at all. Even outside of conventions, there are a lot of horror stories that get passed around online about young men getting attacked by *very large women* and incurring some serious physical injuries as a result, as well as being turned off to anime altogether as a result of these experiences.

[@baydiac]

Glomping was such a scourge on conventions. I think homestuck finally killed it, right? Cons turned a blind eye to the sexual harassment/battery aspect (regardless of gender, hi creepy boys who decided any girl with a wig on is your actual waifu) but couldn’t ignore the droves of pissed cosplayers literally wearing the evidence-cosplay after expensive cosplay absolutely ruined with smudges and splatters of grey body paint.

[@sashkinpashkin]

I've only ever glomped once or twice with a close friend who was ok with it, attacking random strangers at conventions is a completely other thing entirely that is unacceptable.

[@Sinc3r3ly]

I’m a woman and I get Glomped too

[@starduststriker8792]

@@baydiac that sounds about right

[@maffieduran]

I also heard about heavyset many grown ass men doing it to very young (many even underage) female cosplayers.

[@JAY-1-2-3-4]

If I ever get a time machine I'm going to go back to when yaoi paddles were sold, and sell butt cups for protection

[@PanAndScanBuddy]

It's the paddlers who were trying to cover their asses, if you catch my drift.

[@IsomerMashups]

Butt pads with a sharp point on each cheek to snap the paddle in pieces upon contact.

[@JAY-1-2-3-4]

@@IsomerMashups butt pads that are extremely bouncy so when hit by a yaoi paddle, both the paddle and its user go flying

[@noesunyoutuber7680]

​@@JAY-1-2-3-4Team Rocket's blasting off again...

[@InkedBantam]

This is a piece of con history that should remain locked away, unable to unleash its evil upon current con-goers and all of cons itself

[@vilotdarkmanner6801]

Especially since yaoi is literally just for women who want to fetishize gay men.

[@najadamu2724]

@@vilotdarkmanner6801 That's a whole other can of worms that isn't as simple as you make it out to be...

[@user-ck7sf2xc6c]

@@vilotdarkmanner6801 Also BDSM enthusiasts cuz shit gets kinky

[@InkedBantam]

@@user-ck7sf2xc6c Gonna be honest just leave BSDM folks out of this. As long as they're not harming folks and are equally consensual with their partners there's no issue.

[@InkedBantam]

@@vilotdarkmanner6801 as a gay trans dude I reeeeally don't like the concept of yaoi and fujoshis and their antics tbh. They fetishise gay relationships to the point it's unhealthy and most of them can be homophobic.

[@QwopTheFrog]

Oh gods, yeah, the yaoi paddle! My boyfriend still has a piece of one. "Why just a piece??" WELL. Flashback to Youmacon, back when one of the volunteer staff still did his Pimpachu costume (you can find a photo really easy simply googling "pimpachu," just look for the big, fabulous black man). Someone asked if he'd like to be paddled, he said yes. My boyfriend, cosplaying Orochimaru, asked if he could do the paddling, Pimpachu said to hit him hard as he could, so.... Well, Pimpachu got hit so hard THE PADDLE BROKE INTO 3 PIECES. The owner, oddly happy as fuck, kept the biggest piece, and my boyfriend and Pimpachu both took smaller pieces. Leon, if you're reading this, I hope your ass was okay

[@killerbug05]

Lol wtf??

[@OtakuMastar]

That is the best con story ever

[@Veste7182]

Youmacon is so blursed. Never a dull moment there.

[@doodledevore7745]

This is a marvelous story, that shall be remembered for centuries.

[@gold_spin1639]

I feel like if all the pieces were brought together, they’d fuse back together to form the almighty excalapaddle

[@tehrinny7031]

First Emotion: Aaaah yes, Yaoi Paddle Nostalgia. Second Emotion: I miss cons. I miss going through dealer rooms and seeing all these vendors even if they don't have anything I even want. Sitting in close contact with other strangers ON THE FLOOR. 2020 is a weird time, man.

[@mitkitty]

I wanna go spend excessive amounts of money at the merch hall ;^;

[@maartenboy37]

Amen, weird times.

[@kikiohearts]

Why was there so much floor sitting!?

[@kagitsune]

@@kikiohearts No chairs, tired feet, waiting in line for panels and screenings, ya know.

[@Monocultured01]

I'm gonna be so happy to walk through a crowd of strangers without having to worry about anything after this is all over.

[@sstarbee]

I've never been more glad a story was false with regard to the person who was believed to be permanently paralyzed by one of these things. It still sucks what happened, don't get me wrong, but thank goodness they weren't permanently paralyzed.

[@CamziVonZombie]

“I love sushi.” “I love Japan, period.” “The tea ceremonies!” “J-rock!” “GIRUGAMESH.” “I love anime!” “And manga!” - Sakura-Con Commerical, 2009. It was a different time.

[@tellnate29]

Words cannot describe the irrational rage I feel seeing a rainbow flag with "yaoi" written in it

[@teaakai6465]

that is completely rational rage

[@Sam-bm6yf]

HONESTLY

[@nameofthename]

god i kept getting so pissed seeing that thing

[@izy419]

same it’s so gross-

[@KingOfGaymes]

Not to mention it’s like ripping and gross like please just throw it out

[@shelbyeileen7644]

"Our story starts at a craft store in Cleveland over 20 years ago" When you learn your city is lowkey the birthplace of the Yaoi Paddle Phenomenon. Edit: ASKJF- I was not expecting so many likes and comments! Thank you all so much!! ;;

[@puellabella3580]

So far we have this and 5 cent beer night for cool stuff that happened here

[@lovemagicfantastic]

🎶Come on down to Cleveland Town, everyone🎶 🎶Our main export is Yaoi Paddles🎶

[@LonelySpaceDetective]

God, I heard it at first as "crack store", and it didn't register to me that it was actually a craft store until way later in the video.

[@Tpeaks]

Congratulations

[@puellabella3580]

Sweet Tea Now our main export is LeBron James and our economy is crippling depression

[@squidyy2k]

A repost of my comment from the old video, “The year is 2099. Two wanderers roam the blown out desert that was once the midwest, searching desperately for a metal detector for any signs of the old world. After weeks of searching, they finally have a signal, weak but still there. And so they dig, and dig, and dig until they finally find it, a long suitcase with rusted zippers. They cut open the strange bag, hoping to find some hidden treasure from years past. But as it turns out, they got far more than they bargained for.” This was one of my best comments and I didn’t want it to be lost to the ashes of time.

[@reNINTENDO]

'99 doesn't seem far enough in the future to warrant an "old world", but given how the last few years went I'm not ruling it out anymore. Depending on how information may have been lost, I'm guessing they would just assume it was some oddly ineffective brand of boat oar.

[@aguchamp7766]

Even the video is getting a reboot.

[@Aster_Risk]

Ohmigod. Glomping. I was in high school 2005-2009 and that was such a thing. My husband went to high school with me and doesn't remember it. I sometimes mockingly say "glomps you," and except for my older sister, no one seems to get what I'm referencing.

[@mst3kluv]

90s kids remember *glomps you* rawr XDD

[@notshardain]

i started hs in 2009, people still glomped, to the point that my school made a rule just for glomping by my final year.

[@AdventDoom]

"The Rebuild of the Rise and Fall of the Yaoi Paddle 2.0 RE: Brotherhood: You can [Not] Glomp Turbo HD Remix Extend XX Accent Core Plus R Final Mix Kai Exe: Late [cl-r] Remastered Special Collectors Anniversary Edition"

[@joaoteixeira3202]

origins

[@MrRuano825]

& Knuckles

[@Junior_Psychonaut]

Now with new Funky Mode

[@rotciv557]

The Return of Yaoi Paddle's Revenge. The Reckoning. Electric Boogaloo.

[@Fire_Score_Maximum]

Royal

[@dat_koosh]

*_It's all fun and games until someone runs down the stairs with a Yaoi Paddle_*

[@ringrang8302]

The fact that fujos once shamelessly roamed the earth with weapons branded w "yaoi" in bold letters is a very chilling statement on the state of society ...

[@ExtremeWreck]

industrial society and its future*

[@clarkwhite998]

ahegao hoodies are worse tbh

[@PeeperSnail]

There's a cursed suitcase and cursed crate out there with the last yaoi paddles ever made, the hunt is on

[@Zulf85]

Ahegao shirt is the new yaoi paddle Side note, Hen Da Ne is an absolutely amazing name for a doujin seller

[@li5up6]

What's wrong with ahegao shirts? Is there something I've missed that makes them as dangerous as a weapon?

[@HadeaRin]

@@li5up6 It is a shirt full of hentai-characters doing sex. I only ever saw the female one and it was.... disturbing.

[@miaugato93]

But the ahegao shirt doesn't hurt you physically. It is annoying once you see the 57th con-goer using it though.

[@MatheusSantos-xp5lb]

@@miaugato93 it does physic damage

[@mnbuni8065]

@@miaugato93 lots of Asian people (mostly western) don't like it and get uncomfortable about it. and apparently it's based on a pedo comic, by a pedo ._.

[@therealquade]

I want a Yaoi Paddle to take to a BDSM Club I know of. there's at least 3 weebs there and they'd loose their minds just seeing it

[@Belgand]

Same. I've never been part of con culture, so I missed out on this. Considering the huge overlap between BDSM and all other geek things there are a bunch of cosplayers and con goers I know who were the right age for that era. There are so many ways to make it work for a fun scene. Maybe if I could get an order of them together to sell at Folsom...

[@samiuseliina]

Haha I can think of many that would just die of laughter at seeing it and then curse about their age.

[@peachpaty8873]

As far as I know, you can just buy a normal paddle and write "YAOI" on it with a black marker

[@jigglypuff52]

How much would you pay for it? 😉

[@joserobertosolismerlin5527]

THE LEGENDS WERE TRUE!!!

[@WarmLillie]

I guess these Yowie paddle was a massive hit but in the end it instead hurt everyone.

[@artoriapendragonidilfitri7414]

That's true Lillie of the warmth.

[@beckc101ify]

BA DA DUM DUM TSSSSSSSH. 🥁

[@Hawwwlucha]

BOOOOOOOOO

[@wisemankugelmemicus1701]

Yaoi*

[@Ultimus31]

Fun fact! The Yowie is a creature of Australian folklore.

[@improvwithlions4173]

I'll say one thing about glomping, I'm not a touchy-feely person and being around anime kids in that era helped me loosen up about people wanting hugs. Which you know, sometimes comes up in contexts that are less weird.

[@kirbyfanprime]

The one time I got glomped at a con, the other individual asked permission first. So, while I knew there was a problem, I never was subject to it. The pseudo-anonimity of cosplay did help lots of shy people open up, myself included.

[@mst3kluv]

Its all fine if you ask first. I'm physically disabled and sometimes people touch me on the shoulder without permission. (pre 2020) This obviously upsets me because I feel my body is not my own. Not everybody is okay with physical contact sprung upon them.

[@isitleeyourelookingfor6352]

I'm glad for you, but......I still wouldn't encourage it. I suffer from a severe anxiety disorder, and something like that would have me panicking for the whole rest of the day. Most of the time, I like hugging fellow cosplayers if they just *ask,* and I think that could have the same effect, pretty much

[@Nadia1989]

I got glomped in 2012 by a teenager, and I let out a scream people thought I was being murdered. The culprit, someone almost ten years my junior, was kicked out inmediately by security. I stopped going to cons after that.

[@artsyscrub3226]

If someone glomped me (even without covid) i would probably have a panic attack, I'm autistic and unwanted touch is one of my triggers, i would probably be already stressed from the con itself someone glomping me would not end well, and most likely ruin my entire con experience.

[@raycearcher5794]

Imagine you've just finished your Nicholas Wolfwood costume. The centerpiece is a huge, replica cross-gun that you can wear on your back; it even pops open where he keeps his pistols and you can put your drinks and badges in there. And while you're waiting in line to get Doug Smith's autograph, you hear "WOLFIE-KUUUN" and then hear the crunch of warping thermoplastic and splintering craft foam as a comedy wood paddle buries itself in your prop-gun backpack at buns level. I mean, I wouldn't be thrilled.

[@treblebat]

"Glomping" Me, a former Hetalia cosplayer: (sweats in terror) oh...oh GOD the fan-girls...everywhere...

[@dr.jackbright963]

Oh God! I still see small groups if hetalia floating around, its abit less dead as scp foundation, but ive gotten Romano cosplayers to full on try and step into a trashcan willingly as a joke of course

[@yorukaadams940]

I wanna cosplay Hetalia now to get Romano cosplayers.

[@treblebat]

Lol i was Romano in like 2010-2011. Well crossdressed Ramano. It was easier than binding for me.

[@elucified]

Honestly I kinda wish there was a Hetalia season made specifically in regards to how each country handled COVID, and also the state of worldly affairs that are going on right now in 2020.

[@dr.jackbright963]

@@elucified thats a great idea, but America is handling it like shit! It would just be Alfred running around and screaming

[@pootoobaby738]

*gets war flashbacks of the doujin hawker yodeling about hot sexy boy on boy love action*

[@Ponch_ITK]

The yaoi paddle *A weapon to surpass Metal Gear*

[@yuryvendiktov4832]

@Corvo@AZ do you know what metal gear solid?

[@cocopots]

I remember being "glomped" when I was cosplaying as ciel, with my dad and my younger sister. I was 13. This girl was very easily 30, needless to say it was the most awkward thing in my life. This was my first time cosplaying, it was also my last.

[@SamuraiMujuru]

Getting 'nam flashbacks of working across from Hendane at Anime Central all those years ago. I still hear "GET YOUR RED HOT YAAAAOOOOIIII" screamed in my nightmares...

[@ferociousmaliciousghost]

I'm happy I didn't know what anime was at that time.

[@deezgod45]

*GET YOUR RED HOT YAAAAAAOOOOOOIIII*

[@PregnantOrc]

Now I'm curios if one could attend an anime convention cosplaying as a Yaoi paddle. Like a full body foam Yaoi paddle suit

[@quantumblauthor7300]

You get confiscated and put in a bag

[@GameGrumps]

extremely informative

[@Ramen-4-Life]

Hey, Michelle! Look, it's Danny and Arnold! They left a comment on the Yaoi Paddle video I'm watching!

[@paddle_my_mad_laddle]

what the fuck it's actually game grumps

[@sheriffbirb2781]

I knew they'd be here

[@Account_Not_Applicable]

I wonder if the elusive bag will or has ended up at those stores for unclaimed baggage. The one in Alabama got a hold of the bag that had the rotting "corpse" of the Hoggle animatronic from Labyrinth, years after it was lost (they even did their best to restore him). If they can find a piece of nerd movie history, anime con history isnt so far fetched

[@suzerainty4192]

Hell yeah, Yaoi Paddle: Brotherhood

[@buttermilkgaia]

,, Mostly by overzealous teenaged girls" this perfectly describes yaoi fans in general

[@RedheadButNotReally]

I still find it difficult to believe that people actually thought hitting other random people with a literal wooden paddle was in _any_ way funny or acceptable. For a thing called "common sense", a lot of people sure seem to lack it. ',:/

[@quantumblauthor7300]

"common," not "guaranteed"

[@therabbitfollower5550]

I've said this previously, but it bears repeating: The last time I saw yaoi paddles being sold was also the last time I saw someone cosplaying a troll face from one of those rage comics that were fucking everywhere back in the day. Oh, how the times have changed.

[@TacocatX]

Hello sibling

[@raziel482]

During the time when paddles were a thing, my friends all collectively decided that they were the one thing that they needed to bring back from cons as souvenirs for me, since I could only barely afford a ticket to most cons let alone go merch shopping. So I have a small collection of various paddles; I have seven paddles including Yaoi, Yuri, and Uke paddles. No one ever bought me one of the Seme paddles and I never wanted to drop the money to buy one for myself. The one time I was carrying a paddle at a con was a fairly surreal experience for me, I didn't hit anyone with it without permission but I did notice that some people, particularly women and girls gave me a wide berth, while other people, particularly men and boys, would come up to me and actually asked to be spanked. Which I think is part of the whole initiation/hazing thing honestly; women got harassed by the paddles and men wanted to prove they could handle being spanked by one. I spanked a few people with my paddle, but only people who'd asked for it, on the whole having random people come up to me and ask me to spank them was super uncomfortable (there was this one guy in some cosplay I've never been able to identify who asked me to spank him and when I didn't do it hard enough he demanded I do it again until he was satisfied, and it was probably the most awkward I've ever felt in a public place). I left my paddle in my hotel for the rest of the con after that.

[@user-ef2hl2zv6m]

Omg the fact that we're already adjusting for inflation when talking about 2005 makes me so feel so uncomfortable

[@Moon-Vixen]

"I'm very happy to report by the way that while they do still sell at conventions, they have long since stopped the yelling" no, no they have not. the booth at animazement, for every year that I've gone (around 13 years) they continued to yell out, but not just things like "red hot yaoi action" as you show in that screenshot, but specifically yelling out that they had "hot teacher/student lesbian action" and the like, with at LEAST 3 children within earshot, one boy around 10, one girl around 8, and another little girl around 6. not to mention my actual lesbian ass standing right there and watching creepy grown men suddenly flock to the booth to buy. they are absolutely still a menace in the dealer's room.

[@karrie7993]

Red Bard: So what happened to the Yoai paddle then? Where did they come from-- My ADHD Brain TM, without hesitation: Where did they go? Where did they come from, Cotton Eyed Joe.

[@truemind1018]

i want one of those first hand-burned yaoi paddles. not to use or take to a convention mind you(i never even gone to a anime convention, not even a weeb or whatever either, i just got sent here by the mad god that is the algorithms) i just want to HAVE one, like on a mantle in my house or whatever. like a evil cursed demon-blade being put on display by a lich.

[@truemind1018]

"hmm, oh yes, i see you noticed my original 20 yaoi paddle, stained with the blood and glitter of a cosplayer. indeed, it is a truly cured and evil item, one that can be wielded mind you, so remember that if you were to annoy me."

[@valentine87002]

oh my god im so happy im too young to really have been part of this, these paddles and the “glomping” sounds so uncomfortable- im physically disabled and have major PTSD, and the idea of someone hitting or hugging me out of nowhere makes me panicky just thinking about, why was this so accepted-

[@textiless]

whats up with yaoi fans and having no boundaries? like ive been asked whos the seme and uke in my relationships way too many times but at least i havent been attacked with a paddle i guess

[@ScrawnyTreeDemon]

CHRIST that's nasty

[@asmrtpop2676]

anime fans*. trust me female cosplayers get shit like this from men

[@textiless]

asmRTPOP oh GOD ive seen so many men just causually assault cosplayers its fucking disgusting

[@textiless]

Grima the Fell Dragon oh look the gay fetishist is gonna tell me the fetishization of my sexuality isnt already crossing a boundary

[@caroldias5219]

i feel you, although I believe some people in general are like that bc I've had to deal with stuff like when I'm with my girlfriend. maybe that's why I like shounen ai more than yaoi, less focus on the "sex" part I guess idk

[@PocketLeaves]

I have never been so glad of the fact that I didn't start going to cons until 2016. Especially because my first cosplays were popular characters from animes that aren't yaois, but have a heavy fugoshi fanbase.

[@Schlelkohov]

A local con I went to had an out-of-place stand with an older man selling primitive swords and knives they made from rocks, sticks, and stuff they found along the highway, like a tire iron lmao

[@Moocow2003]

hes the irl equivalent of a video game merchant

[@ovoanaestheticovo3740]

starter gear

[@sheriffaboubakar9720]

Lol that's the guy who sells shit armor no one buys in RPGs

[@mynoseisrunning7245]

Yaoi obsessed teenage girls scare me more than nuclear war

[@cloudieo]

I would much rather survive a nuclear war then be in a group full of yaoi obbsesd teenage girls

[@BlackKnightsCommander]

If the Yaoi paddle was only invented in 2017 ish we'd've gotten hundreds of Astolfo cosplayers with them and I'm so glad that they didn't ruin the character.

[@Tannershide]

I got in trouble for just... just decking someone at a convention for "glomping" me. I got kicked out. I have no idea who it was and none of similarly inclined friends ever confronted me about it so I'm guessing stranger. Don't. Grab. Me.

[@54therunner]

that's not your fault, that asshole shouldn't have glomp you

[@wearelegallyrequiredtoeatd3580]

Bro... Same, I never went to anime conventions during that time but If I did and someone tried that shit on me I would punch them so fast and so hard, I'm really touch aversed and rarely ever hug my own friends. I've punched ppl before because they kept pulling my hair and poking me in uncomfortable places, totally innapropriate Consent is important, if you a hug just ask for the hug ffs, there's legit people who have triggers because of touch ( Sexual assault survivors, autistic people, people with social anxiety, etc ) you can legit be making someone live through a terrible experience by touching them without asking, and even if they didn't you still shouldn't touch strangers, I feel no sympathy for anyone who got punched or kicked in the face for glomping strangers

[@agnes7404]

The yaoi paddle has so much of a cultural impact it should be listed on the lost media wiki

[@kawaiiempoleon8721]

THE SAGA OF THE YAOI PADDLE CONTINUES

[@Maid_of_Spiders]

When you mentioned glomping I flash backed so hard I got whiplash.

[@aiwash2766]

Can’t wait for that glomping vid

[@Aster_Risk]

I hope there's actually a video and that wasn't just a gag.

[@PanAndScanBuddy]

I'm glomping at the bit

[@emilyjones9787]

Last time I was this early ahegao merch was still allowed in cons

[@boianko]

Is it not allowed now? Why?

[@l.l.a.s3645]

@@boianko shhh don't ask, just be grateful that it happened.

[@miaugato93]

@Unojhiir0 that's cursed. By that logic all the figurines are going out. Or at least will become brownboxed, which makes it harder to check for contraband...

[@maruitou]

bruh i still see ahegao at cons i go too all the time

[@AluminumFusion22]

Ahegao clothes are still allowed, but only at after dark events.

[@Ice-Climber]

I was a part of MCM forums back in the day, and there were alot of problems with them. People were not happy with the way people were using them as well as certain people were behaving. Also there was just alot of problem with Hen de Ne for their shouty sales methods (especially as MCM was public event open to all ages and they always came out with some pretty nasty stuff).

[@SecretIdentityStudio]

Ah, yes, the Get Your Red Hot Yaoi guy...

[@crystalqueen9711]

God, this only makes me miss conventions even more

[@IamTealeaf]

Why though? Yaoi paddles are awful and literally sexual harassment lol

[@beanie-man]

Me: *hears the word 'Y*oi'* Me: *Vetnam flashbacks to 'Tweek x Craig'*

[@gothicfroggy]

I may miss cons, but I definitely will never miss things like this or "free hugs" signs...

[@rinbobetteweebabobo5965]

Me seeing the title: hey yo it's the remix

[@v0rtexbeater]

I'll never get tired of English speakers pronouncing Yaoi as "yawi"

[@chumblewumble2422]

How are you supposed to pronounce it lol

[@satapon4129]

It's yah-oh-ee, saying yawi is just easier for English speakers?

[@healinggrounds19]

@@satapon4129 we Americans tend to drop syllables and make words shorter. We love 2 syllable words. We are also lazy about pronouncing word endings.

[@TheMichigami]

@@satapon4129 its mispronunciation became common here in the U.S. because most people only saw it written down the first time they learned of the word, and tried to play the "pronounce it the way it looks" game and lost, and thus yaoi said as "yowee" or "yow-i" was born. We're also the country that starts fistfights in some regions over whether Pecans are said as pee-can or pi-cahn, so maybe don't look to us as experts for proper pronunciation of words in english either. ^_^;

[@Vyansya]

Better than english speaker saying "Aoi/Aoki" as ayo-ee/ayokee lmao

[@wonderlandartwork3579]

On the topic, I really support cons starting to ban ahegao clothing aswell. The uproar from the (mostly male) community is honestly quite hilarious. "waaah but it's just faces" yeah but context matters my dude and many people are just not comfortable with being exposed to pornographic images at an all ages event. Save it for the afterdark events.

[@anjetto1]

I was in my late teens in 2006. There will never be people like that again. Early to mid teens who liked anime from 2003 to 2007 are a breed apart. It was crazy. Rise of the internet. Pre social media. Rise of a new type of outsider and cultural underground (that thankfully became mainstream) adults not fully understanding what it was. Weird overlap with multiple cliques. I'm old now, but this was a stark reminder of what an insufferable weirdo I was.

[@mehlover]

Thanks so much for clarifying and correcting your mistakes from your pervious video. I greatly appreciate it when content creators do that. That said I'm glad to know that no one was injured that badly or someone was thrown in jail for that and their life being ruined. And at least the sales stopped before anything like that could ever happen irl. With all the 2000's anime otaku nostalgia, kinda surprised Hen da ne or anyone else for that matter tried to make small key chain size of yaoi paddles or just tiny versions of them to just take advantage of the nostalgia. Eh maybe not as funny when you have the actual size of it. But good video essay! I'm looking forward to your next one!

[@Angie_OwOb]

"i was pretty inexperienced when I made that video" dear lord the 1.0 video felt like a discovery channel documentary already. this girl has some high standarts.

[@TheNobleFive]

I'm sad that I got into anime too late to experience these immature things. I understand that they can't last in a professional environment, but damn.

[@miaugato93]

Me before this video: _I wish I got into anime earlier, I'd be like a guru now_ Me after this video: *ok maybe I'm good where I am* xD But seriously, i do wish that i got into anime earlier, as in childhood. I only got into it at age 18 and while that was 8 years ago and you gotta start somewhere I always think I missed out on some important part of the fandom. And ya know, feeling like I came late into something that was ending. And while i still feel this way about when I started, videos like this made me realize I didn't miss that much of the community scene, and if anything modern cons are harder, bigger and stronger now that they're bona-fide events. I do regret not getting into cons a bit earlier though. Granted, my country's only anime con has only started in 2010, but i feel I'd get more into the thing if i went my first time in 2016 and not in 2019. Or maybe it's this 2020 mood and not being able to go this year. (Well it's still scheduled for October and I'll only skip it if there is a direct ban on it, I even got a kawaii face mask. If having been to in in 2019 taught me something is that i love this aspect of the community. I even wanted to go in cosplay - but neither i gave myself time for it to be made neither i am in shape for cosplay anymore - blame the quarantine. Maybe in 2021 perhaps.

[@miaugato93]

@Renai Circular Motion We're getting annoying again? YES! Sign me up xD

[@Galaxy--Bug]

I have quite the devilish idea... OwO and UwU paddles.

[@chocomilkling]

At this point in the world, that should be a real thing.

[@Adammyers1995]

9:56 Naka-Kon is my local con and I remember seeing a Grell cosplayer with a paddle back in 2015. I had no idea what it was at the time lol

[@kirbyfanprime]

It's how I learned the words in the first place.

[@asmrtpop2676]

That’s my local con too....!

[@TheAntagonistHero]

Now remake the Fata Morgana video. Not because the old one is flawed or anything, I just want to hear you talk about it more.

[@Mushroomhoe]

I remember in 2013 someone managed to bring one of these to a black butler meet at a con. He had people lining up to get smacked in the ass with it. Really creepy thinking back because the meet was packed with 13-16 year olds. Me being 16 at the time

[@snowbeast4463]

2000s conventions were like the wild west. At her first convention, my younger sister had a bunch of people 'glomp' her at once and one of them stepped on her foot (she was wearing sandals as part of her cosplay) and made it bleed. She had to travel all the way home like that.

[@pixelatedlenses]

This was such a thoughtful, really interesting follow up to your original video. Can't wait for your next one!

[@ladyyatexel]

I got glomped within fifteen minutes of setting foot at my first anime convention by a girl who threw herself from the top of a small flight of stairs because she thought my real clothes and my real freakishly long braid were cosplay of Duo from Gundam Wing. It remains one of the weirdest experiences I've ever had. I only ever went to three cons, but they were all within Prime Yaoi Paddle Timeframe and I was always kind of afraid to go near anyone holding one. Not only did I not fully understand what they might be implying, but after the glomping I was suddenly very aware that cons were a PVP-enabled zone.

[@redlemonsydney]

I attend J-popcon in Denmark annually, so hearing that it was the last place the yaoi paddle was ever sold got a huge laugh out of me

[@carolinewheeler77]

Yknow I hate when teenagers are blamed for a toxic fandom ( *especially* teenage girls) but this is one of the few times where that mindset is warranted. I’m glad that my con going experience started well after these things were banned.

[@FennecFool]

As an Ohio native, it gives me great joy that you specifically mentioned Pat Catan's and that something as crazy as this originated in one of the craft stores I practically grew up in.

[@ohmygoditisspider7953]

Hope you're more towards places like Ashley and Orrville and not places like Toledo or Cleveland. Toledo here (don't tell me if it's you, too) and cities in Ohio are the WORST.

[@andyp8840]

A Pat Catan's in Cleveland? That's where I bought all my craft supplies as a kid. To think that I might have gotten my trifold posterboard for school projects at the same place the "Yaoi Paddle" was conceived...

[@beckc101ify]

Yet another amazing vid from ya, Red Bard! I love how you revisited everything you could! Can't wait to see the GLOMPing vid!

[@matthewpennella2184]

Great job on the updated video Kennedy! Excited to see what you have coming next!