REFERENCES & CHECKS | Are the references intense? | UK Adoption | mollymamaadopt

Hi all!
Hope you find this video useful.
Some useful resources for you (be wary some local authorities/voluntary agencies may use their own templates but these can be used as guidance):
Personal reference template: corambaaf.org.uk/sites/defaul...
School and nursery reference: corambaaf.org.uk/sites/defaul...
Former partner reference: corambaaf.org.uk/sites/defaul...
Employer reference: corambaaf.org.uk/sites/defaul...
Financial check form: corambaaf.org.uk/sites/defaul...
Instagram: @mollymamaadopt
Twitter: @mollymamaadopt
Etsy shop (adoption workbook): www.etsy.com/uk/shop/mollymam...
Our UK Adoption Story: • OUR UK ADOPTION STORY ...
UK Adoption Assessment Process: • UK ADOPTION ASSESSMENT...
Starting the UK Adoption Process: • STARTING THE UK ADOPTI...
Find an adoption agency (UK): www.first4adoption.org.uk/fin...
Adoption UK: www.adoptionuk.org/

[@sumz1721]

Your videos are really helpful!! Thank you

[@suzidavis6170]

Hi Molly, this is very helpful thank you 😊 I did wonder about exs and wasn't sure if I have to list all of them as I only lived with a couple and some were more serious than others as life goes. My husband didn't live with any if his. I suppose we will see when we get to that stage. Just researching at the moment and your channel is super helpful! X

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

Hey! We were told that you only need to list those you lived with 😃 every agency may be different though! X

[@suzidavis6170]

@@MollyMamaAdopt thank you! Your a great mum ❤ x

[@MaidaPoppins]

Hello, thanks for the videos-super helpful! Just starting to look into adoption as a single adopter. I’ve been working in childcare (mostly as a nanny) for 20 years, do you know if every family/setting will need to be contacted for a reference? That’s a lot of references!!

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

That’s amazing news! In our case we were told every employer where we’ve worked with children would have to be contacted but each local authority or agency will have their own rules x

[@katierippon6106]

Did you get anxious about your references getting done ASAP? One of ours has submitted theirs for us last week, one has started but not finished and one hadn’t received the request so I had to check email and send it again to agency.

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

I didn’t actually but I can understand why you would. From what I remember I think they had a good month to get the references done (written ones) and I did ensure that my referees knew how important it was to do them sooner.

[@katierippon6106]

@@MollyMamaAdopt that’s what I’ve done

[@lennon1005]

Do they ask to see your bank statements? X

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

Ours did, yes.

[@nazifaislam6636]

Can you do a video on housing and specifically the need to have a spare room. Is this always the case even if you're adopting a baby/Fostering to adopt? XX

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

I will try & incorporate it into a home check visit video! I believe it is always the case in the UK. Even if you foster to adopt a baby that baby will need to grow up to have their own bedroom (unless you adopt with a bio sibling of theirs - i think there’s some flexibility here) x

[@nazifaislam6636]

@@MollyMamaAdopt Thank you! Will watch out for the Video :) X

[@carllake6954]

Hi, myself & my partner are on stage 1 at the moment despite our local authority home only having 2 bedrooms & we have an 11yr old daughter so no spare room at the moment. We made an initial enquiry with our local authority’s adoption agency & after about 30 mins of questions she ended the call to consult her manager, she call us back 10 mins later with a very definite no, but this left us in a “chicken & egg” scenario cause the local authority would not rehouse us as we are adequately housed for our current needs but we can’t adopt until we have a spare room 🤷‍♂️...this left us feeling frustrated, however we weren’t going to be beaten by falling at the first hurdle, so I emailed the Mayor of our council & explained our situation & this has prompted a review into the agency’s policy on housing, in light of this the social worker called the next day to say her manager had given the go ahead to proceed to stage 1!...so don’t give up if you’re a council tenant, keep banging your drum! BEST OF LUCK 🤞🏻

[@nazifaislam6636]

carl lake wow! That is amazing and gives me hope!!! I will definitely not give up after reading this. Thank you so much! Was there anything specific you made sure to mention in your email?

[@carllake6954]

@@nazifaislam6636 just be specific but without ranting & being critical of any one person, the council or their policy. Just highlight your reasons for wanting to adopt without it appearing to be just about getting a house move, if they think it is a ploy you won’t get anywhere. Be as thorough & as articulate as you can!...& good luck.

[@sumz1721]

I also wanted to request you do a video on your opinion on forced adoption?

[@MollyMamaAdopt]

Hi. Thanks for the suggestion! I don’t feel like i personally know enough on this topic to make a video on it. However, in the UK children are only removed from birth families if it’s in the best interest of the child. Social services do everything they can to keep children with their birth families but unfortunately that isn’t always the best option for a child’s well-being. As adopters in the UK we don’t pay a fee for adopting - I know in other countries this sparks a lot of conflict around the subject. As adopters we are also trained to maintain as many links to a child’s birth family and history as possible because we know it’s the best thing for our children. Hope that helps x