Remove Sex & Alcohol from your relationship (for a month).

[@NhlaloMlotshwa]

Many couples were separated during Covid because they realised, they didn't know each other at that period when practically everyone was required to stay at home.🍀

[@pensonmlotshwa]

That’s very very true! People weee forced to get to know each other… Yho!

[@toji2254]

I did this once while going on a 21 day fast... Only a strong spiritual relationship with my higher power was left after that 😂

[@pensonmlotshwa]

OH WOW 🫣🫣🫣

[@dimphoselepe4542]

Hahaha the other relationship caught fire🤣💯

[@Luyandah360]

Every time you go to gym 🤣you come back with a new topic

[@wisemanmabusela6524]

Kuningi okwenzeka kule gym 😂😂😂

[@kram9076]

Your topics these days are very lit 😢 whoever does this will have their relationships tested. These days most ppl date for vibes only and wonder why some guys take more than 2years to "get to know you" before they know they want to marry you 😂 and women suddenly expect gf salary after 2 dates 😂😂😂

[@pensonmlotshwa]

So true!!! People date for vibes!!!

[@Wenzy_Royal]

Another issue that's causing this is people do things that are copy and pasted from social media. Some couples don't even know what they truly enjoy because they filter their worldview by gaging online. Instead of forming safe spaces for connection.

[@mandimg_1804]

Girl! The clash when you both realise that your values aren't even aligned! 🥲

[@JOSEPH-is7wp]

Thats so true, infact I would go as far as saying most people dont even know what they themselves want out of life

[@lehlagaremogadime7494]

That's true, most of us the things we like are just influenced by social media

[@nompumelelonomvula8394]

“Baby what are we?” Aibo Aibo 😂😂😂

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Hahahahahahahah!!! 🤭

[@Kgomotso_Machele]

Sobriety is very intimidating guys, that sh%T ain't for the faint hearted. It takes mental fortitude and discipline to intentionally get on a path to self-discovery, let alone trying to get to know another human being without vibes and social gatherings. Escapism is convenient and easy.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

I’m super intimidated… hence why I make these mistakes all the time! We just need to try to do better!

[@AmuMabasa]

Man, I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but have you noticed how deep conversations got that uneasy vibe? Like, for real-folks dodge them joints like the rent is due. Makes us feel all kinds of exposed, you feel me? We got these wild ideas, living rent-free in Imagination Land, and when we finally speak up? People clownin’ like, "Yo, you’re trippin'!" Personal story time: I was stuck in this job I straight-up hated for three long years. Man, I was mad salty-walking around like a dark cloud with legs. Then there was this so-called "friend," always throwing shade, like, "Yo, why you even working a 9-to-5? Couldn’t be me." Bro was sipping that silver-spoon smoothie with his rich-family vibes. What he didn’t get was, I had to thug it out. Gotta pay bills, keep it cool at home. But I told him, “Yo, I got plans. I’m going back to stand-up comedy, real talk.” Fast forward-here I am, rocking a new gig I actually love. Happier than I’ve been in years. And guess what? I’m back on stage, killing it with the jokes. My new job lets me keep my grind straight-balancing the comedy hustle, my KZbin channel, all that. And that so-called “friend”? He’s just watching from the sidelines, looking dumbfounded. Don’t believe me? Just watch. Don’t believe me? Just watch. Man, I coulda fallen for the okie-doke-stayed in that dead-end job, let my dreams collect dust. But nah, I’d have been the biggest sucker alive. Here’s the real: you gotta watch who you get vulnerable with. Some cats, some chicks-they ain’t here to build you up. They’d rather tear you down, make you feel stupid for dreaming big. Real ones don’t move like that. A real one might be like, “Yo, I don’t see this for you, but maybe you got something else in your blind spot. Let’s explore-what’s to lose?” That’s love. That’s friendship. That’s reciprocity. A partnership where both parties lift each other up, catch the flaws the other can’t see. But let’s keep it a buck-real connections? Harder to find than a clean cop in a dirty precinct. Some of y’all out here loving the very thing that’s tearing you apart. I’ve seen women ride-or-die for dudes who wouldn’t catch a cold for them. And fellas, y’all guilty too. Why bother with deep talks? They expose your realness-your level of maturity, or your shadows. Me? I get shook around intellectual women. Love it, though. The right one educates, talks to you, not at you. But yo, the wrong one? She’ll clown you into a corner. I was watching that famous divorce lawyer on Soft White Underbelly, and he laid it down: “If you can’t have those raw, uncomfortable talks with your partner, why you even thinking about marriage? You got no problem whipping out your D, doing the nastiest boardroom fantasies to fulfill your fetishes. But when it’s time to talk about your salary, your fears, or how you can be better? You get cold feet. She knows what you like in the sheets, knows you into all kinds of wildness, but she don’t know your pain, your plans, or your purpose. Make it make sense.”

[@lehlagaremogadime7494]

“Yo, I don’t see this for you, but maybe you got something else in your blind spot. Let’s explore-what’s to lose?” This is deep bro, unfortunately there's very few who can think like this.

[@NJChlongwane]

You are God sent, I thought of this exactly 2 weekes ago, I got signals that we don't meet when there's no electricity or when I say I'm not drinking or I'm not in a mood for sex, we once woke up without electricity it was so quiet we had nothing to talk about after 1 year of dating I realized nah we different., religion different, lifestyle different but we chill and drink together but I know deep down we ain't going nowhere

[@B-I-G-N-A-S-T-Y]

Alcohol and weed is nasty, those will waste your time even if you are single. I think taking sex slower from time to time and practicing mindfulness is important to make it more meaningful.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

I hear you. We just numb our true feelings and never deal with them.

[@Luk012NW]

Yaphela kanjalo eyami noRapeleng when Lockdown came. We had nothing to talk about because our views of the world were so different. This was after 2 years of being together! And we didn't know this because our lives were just groove and mdavazo before Lockdown.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

That’s sooo crazy!!! And that was such a common thing during lockdown!

[@thandohlophe6796]

At this rate for me , we need 30mins bro 🙏🙂

[@pensonmlotshwa]

THANK YOU 🙏🏽

[@sbongambongwa3059]

Most people can't even go a week without sex or alcohol 😂worse we're in South Africa. Sex and alcohol are peoples personalities in this country

[@plumpmagic]

Kuyanyiwa yazi. You always feel like the ones who give it up quickly are winning. It's just a hot mess. Feminism and romcoms ruined it

[@pensonmlotshwa]

ITS A HOT MESS!!! I fully agree!

[@Magz-101]

Yo! That “you make shit decisions” hit a nerve lol

[@pensonmlotshwa]

My bad 🤭🫣🤍

[@Magz-101]

@ Siyalidinga iqiniso Mlotshwa ungayeki noma kubaba hahaha

[@malibongwemsomi2230]

Lol

[@teachersikhumbuzomoyo5419]

Genius perspective P🎉

[@andilentuli1309]

Very interesting video, mfo kaMlotshwa. Insightful, indeed. 👏🏼👏🏼

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Siyabonga Ntuli 🙏🏽🙏🏽🤍

[@anthonymakhubu9225]

Inkinga yokuqala nge dessert before starters 🤣🤣

[@pensonmlotshwa]

VERY TRUE!!!

[@means2356]

As young man I think I have learned something from you Bro. These are real facts.

[@Pagasus]

This is relationship gold 👏🏾🙌🏿👌🏾

[@buhlengcibi6979]

These OG's are making it harder for the youngins , imagine all expenses paid trip to cape town or Joburg every month

[@MokgadiGift]

Your consistency ❤on this app bhut Pen .....love it ....road to 30K subbies😊🎉🎉🎉

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Oh wow!!! From your lips to Gods ears 🙏🏽🙏🏽🤍

[@andilesimelane9884]

A lot of couples in working class are on that cycle, terrible stuff

[@sifisomahlaba9438]

This is very interesting and important. You find that you try and go deep or ask serious questions and can get dismissed as being too deep. Most of the time we let this go but never get the answers one is looking for. Over time you accuse each other of not being close but don't ever take the time to know each other.

[@tiisetsoledwaba6994]

Asbonge Pen ✍️ Ushayekhona! I like your nails btw, clean 👌🏽

[@Thebigboyyy]

This will set you free

[@pensonmlotshwa]

It will!!

[@dipuokgabi2588]

I’ve watched this over 3 times now and even shared it on my WhatsApp because this here is something people need to hear. I couldn’t agree more my brother! Well said 🙌🏾

[@gracegumede6741]

You're spot on 💯 When you take out "relationship fillers", you'll understand whether or not your relationship is solid. We also aren't working on ourselves enough, which makes it hard to be comfortable with being vulnerable. You need to be okay with yourself before you can be open and honest with someone else. You also need to know yourself before you can decide if your potential partner aligns with what you need.

[@mandimg_1804]

Realising that I am the reason that my relationships have mostly been sh!t was the self-awareness I was not ready for. Agree with a lot that Penson has said. Take time to engage with the person IF you are looking for substance.

[@nonniesimpson]

🎉🎉🎉 yay! Another episode 🥳

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Trying to keep em coming!

[@anthonymakhubu9225]

Nah you cooked brother 🔥🔥🤣

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Thank you Anthony!!!

[@Leeeiggh]

Somebody cooked here✨

[@xolilelern7244]

Eyy yasho induku mfo... We really are scared of the reality 😂😅

[@pensonmlotshwa]

I’m also veeery scared!!!

[@its_bobhermanus]

No one wants to talk anymore these days. It's anything between gifts, dates and sex

[@pensonmlotshwa]

VERY TRUE!!!

[@samukelomadide797]

Kunzima😮😮😮, sbonge bru. Ushayile 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽isdinga sonke. Accountability and responsibility are an enemy to this generation ours that is why sinenkinga ezingaka.

[@we2dadude981]

Now when I am asked why did I break up with this person. I will submit this video as my explaination, wow i never imagined life being this convenient. With that being said (My comment), it does not mean that they were all not the one, at times I may have been the one on the other (Bad) side as well. Acknowleding wrong and right here doing in public, no one is perfect.

[@Gurswin-g7n]

Good day Mr Mlothswa how are you? Can you please make a video regarding a routine young men should starting implementing on a daily basis to help build character or perhaps you could share some insight on your daily regiment

[@DakaloMaedza-z4m]

I don't know about Penson and his view but I do have insight I'd like to share. ALWAYS START SMALL AND START SLOW Can be picking a specific time to sleep/awaken.then carry on with your fine day Nothing else It takes a month or two to build a habit so take time Slowly but reassuringly after that month or two add more variety SMALL variety Like 5 pushups in the morning, if you want to pray more frequently, do so every breakfast and dinner then make your way to the bedroom, Then daily. Next read ANY book topics ranging from comics to philosophy any book will do maybe 5 mins, Do something new take a long walk/jog and clear your mind and so on A regiment is built and tried for one's personal fitting, making a regiment can improve timekeeping and sharpen thinking making commitment easier Reading a book can improve character and maybe improve your vocabulary in the language learning a new word and such Long walks or time alone may improve mindfulness and whatever physical action is a step to making the gym a regiment All I said improves the Mind and body it'll make you feel eudainomia and a sort of fulfilment And always start small and slow Godspeed good soul.

[@focus_sisaworld2693]

Great video Penson. Take away the money gents.

[@hlumekadumezweni7943]

Uyasinceda kakhulu bhuti. Thanks marn!

[@JOSEPH-is7wp]

Hey Ba Pen, you are definitely cooking here but I feel thats a hard ask for most of these 21st century people. Most of these girls cant even put up a basic conversation even with the aid of multiple stimuli around them so what more when you shut everything else off. These are people that are even scared of being alone with there thoughts. Around June this year I was talking to this hun who I told that there are some Saturdays where I just stay home and choose to turn off my phone and all my gadgets just so that I can just mentally detox and be alone with my thoughts, her response was just the thought of that is scary......she is so scared of being alone with her thoughts to the point that she always needs something distracting her mind at every given moment......she literally always has wine in the house because its what sends her to bed every night. But also I saw this even in other aspects of her life. We always needed to be doing something whenever we were together, she would usually become restless or sad whenever we would just be seating and not doing anything. Jo from Zambia

[@dipuokgabi2588]

That’s true, most people cannot function without stimuli. But I’ve come to learn that the nore you stick to your values and only focus on people who actually align with you is the more you tend to actually meet such people. Yes there arent many people who are willing to work on themselves to become their emotionally, spiritually, physically and psychologically best but if you really want to be with someone who is working on themselves then it’s best to let go of all the others who seem to not be doing so. It may mean being single for a while but that’s frankly way better than being in a hundred superficial relationships and just wasting ones time, energy and effort. There’s girls who are very much self-aware and would be willing to have such conversations, but you probably won’t find them in the same space where you find every other girl. All the best!

[@thandohlophe6796]

On point

[@pensonmlotshwa]

DANKO!!!

[@duncantsolo3273]

So true!

[@hlengiwe1464]

This is 💯🙌🏿

[@nontsikelelonoruwanahealth8035]

it time for me to subscribe.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

DANKO 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@nompumelelonomvula8394]

🤣😂 kodwa yini

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Whaaaaat? 😅🫣

[@sbonzama7013]

People need to spend time together alone maybe a weekend with no phones and internet.

[@sellonkomo839]

Some are with us cause are after something these no genuine connection

[@Sbongakonke02]

People make sex a hobby in such a way that they have 'sex timetables'

[@FranksAttorneysAssociates]

Leave woman alone

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Do you 🙏🏽

[@danielthomo9081]

wow this has been very insightful.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Thank you 🙏🏽

[@sandilesithole3202]

Kahle Mlotshwa

[@Syamthembu5]

My brother ijule kakhulu lena❤❤❤ngyabonga mina

[@Sbongakonke02]

Ey Pen siyavala ema varsity and res relationships ayaphela coz besihlangene nge sex nothing else 🤷

[@sasamahlangu3450]

🔥🙌🏿

[@SiyabongaNkambule-em8gn]

Point lelo grootman

[@FranksAttorneysAssociates]

It's okay to be gay! Leave females alone

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Live your best life 🙏🏽❤️

[@TheGiganticIntellect]

Most women are bored by deep conversations bafo.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Do you want to build with a woman we can’t have serious conversations with?

[@Riverwan312]

I'd like to disagree...my brother.

[@pensonmlotshwa]

Why?

[@Riverwan312]

@@pensonmlotshwa As a young lady myself...Deep conversations are just the foundation of everything. So basically not all women are empty air-heads

[@nicosekano5942]

​@Riverwan312 we have the rule then the exception

[@UzusipheJobe]

Pen your are cooking mfana these days yereee

[@Champ_3251]

A day made....🎉

[@pensonmlotshwa]

@@Champ_3251 OH YEEEEESSSS!!!!

[@Champ_3251]

Kuningi, I got crazy and taboo story to share but yay I'm not ready....some women bro😢

[@pensonmlotshwa]

@@Champ_3251 Send via IG DMs!!!