Responding to Your Poetry (pt. 3)

[@gmenezesdea]

How cool. I didn't know you did that. I'm Brazilian and I write a tradional style of popular poetry commonly known as "literatura de cordel", originating from my home region, the Northeast. I'll try to write one in English and submit it to you. It has a very strict set of rules but it'll be fun trying to stick to them in a different language.

[@WritingwithAndrew]

Por favor! That would be awesome!

[@xzyeee]

For sure with ambiguity in The Young Sun. Writers still have "to give away just enough" to help the reader to scaffold his/her understanding of the piece and to help the reader make the intended unique connections (e.g., verifying, as you said, the sun's self consciousness and clarifying the metaphor of the sun representing something else [a woman] in The Young Sun). This is also why I agree with your views concerning ambiguity concerning Laviathan; however, I do believe that its meaning can be extended to the decay of Hobbes social contract idea in modern life.

[@vicduff2808]

These videos are so helpful!! I would also love to see you review or make suggestions for some sort of poetry collection 🤗

[@mcrumph]

All hail the Great Algo! (Lovecraftian chanting rises.) In my experience, it is pain that let's us know we are still alive. I enjoyed all three of these, & your comments on them, though I would enjoy Leviathan being fleshed out more. Also, perhaps the sun sees the spots differently, sending them forth, plumes of her radiant beauty, while being unaware of the potential havoc they are wreaking on our electronics, bringing our current golden digital age to its knees. But that would be a different poem. Thanks again.

[@WritingwithAndrew]

To the algo! Thanks!

[@kenward1310]

Another great video. Learning quite a bit here, thank you.

[@WritingwithAndrew]

You bet--thanks!

[@Akhhh_00]

You have good video quality but you need to improve the frame. You wanted to place the object (in this case the object is you) in the middle of the frame.

[@FlosBlog]

Maybe I’ll send you some of my poetry

[@WritingwithAndrew]

That would be great!

[@LizzyLonestar]

I wanted to submit poetry, but the legal language on your website scared me off.

[@cmmartti]

Yeah those are some questionable terms of use. There's no point to all the legalese except obfuscation, especially when the most critical part is buried right in the middle: "...for purposes of example, education, and critique." Furthermore, there is absolutely no reason for the next section to be there. Asking submitters to sign their right to attribution, claims to authorship, right to withdraw permission, etc. away is abhorrent, and the company stands to gain nothing from including it. Why not just say this: "You agree that Goldfinch Media may use your submitted works with attribution for the purposes of example, education, and critique, for free without any payment or compensation. "You may withdraw your permissions for use at any time, except for already published media, such as KZbin videos, which we reserve the rights to continue distributing. "You agree that you have the rights to distribute this work and that our use of the work will not infringe on existing copyright-holders." Three sentences that meet all of the company's requirements without any of the nonsense.

[@WritingwithAndrew]

I can appreciate the legal-language anxiety and the generalized distrust of terms and conditions (I often feel it myself). I'm not trained in legal writing, so I'd defer to my legal advisor on the technical nuances--but the practical outcome is visible in videos like this one and, eventually, transcripts and illustrations from videos on the Writing with Andrew website (if I ever get around to it...)

[@Mpalaispunk]

Would you mind haiku?

[@WritingwithAndrew]

Not only wouldn't I mind it--I'd love it!

[@Mpalaispunk]

@WritingwithAndrew Splendid! Actually, I've already sent one 😹

[@Dismythed]

You missed the point of “The Young Sun”. It’s about a woman, not the actual sun.

[@enoki54]

How so? I couldn’t see anything in the poem really pointing to that

[@WritingwithAndrew]

Like I mentioned right at the end, it could be a metaphor like you point out--but we only get the sun half of it if it is

[@pawsonalpetcare]

​@enoki54 The poem uses female pronouns to refer to the sun. Traditionally, the sun is seen as male and the moon female, but here the sun is mother of us all. I see the sunspots as a metaphor for stretchmarks, which society shames women for. A mother's love is a selfless, giving light to her children even if they don't appreciate it.

[@dannicholas9267]

Flower Children A daisy in our hair wild and fresh from the meadow we were full of it then love and heart for all humanity but especially for our enemy we wrapping love notes around the stems we stuffed them within the muzzles that took four down that took four down we are old now no hair left to hold the daisy no daisy left in the parched meadow to hold our heart we place grudge flowers now in the holes of our dead fellows with promises of revenge and justice for all the few left over we save for a muzzle still from time to time stuffed hard with hopes the barrel blows takes off their faces should they attempt to bring another down grudge flowers grow where once the pretty daisy grew happy, merry fist in the air oh my how the children have grown. Dan E. Nicholas, 12.15.24

[@dannicholas9267]

Love the comments...do review Flower Children here, the result of a bitter phone call from an ex, uninviting me for the holidays. Yikes! DN