RIVALS - Terrible Writing Advice

[@DarthLego46]

"Having rivals become romantically interested in each other may be interesting."

[@funfettiparty]

No matter how unlikable the rival is its ALWAYS shipped

[@animatedfire5433]

Yep!

[@bisexualmajima]

Honestly a lot of the times with the heavily shipped ones there's some damn good reasons for that lol. I wonder when real writers will actually try this.

[@Whatismusic123]

That’s why naruto works!

[@polyhymnia701]

Knoxville Craggins The screenwriters for the Star Wars sequels seem to be trying it with Kylo and Rey. Frankly, that's the only good idea they've had in the whole trilogy.

[@SyntheticSeries]

Actually all a rival needs is to choose a pokemon that has a type advantage over the main character.

[@begobolehsjwjangan2359]

Fokin Gary

[@romansrevengethethirdstrik8086]

And complain at every story requires lose while still acting like such a hot shot. Or not even be a rival anymore and just be a dueling partner who’s also going on the players journey

[@fukini2594]

@Gabriel 2020 if you lose to your rival because you didn't master the art of full restores you deserve to be called a loser

[@fukini2594]

@Gabriel 2020 good ol' times when you would beat you rival with so difficulty that you killed the raticate of your friend

[@LordRemiem]

Actually trainers Red and Blue wonderfully fit with this video! They're just the opposite of each other... and since Pokémon was a game series destined to kids, Blue looks more like the classical school bully.

[@panlis6243]

"You cannot solve every writing problem with the love triangle" You underestimate my laziness

[@Thunderbolt-eu3qx]

BAWHAHAHAAW!

[@legrandliseurtri7495]

Don't try it!

[@murilocreations]

As a web writter for 4 years i can say i did It only one time and even forgotten It was a cliche, i kinda surprised that i completely forgotten the love triangle.

[@kaexewires7531]

@@legrandliseurtri7495 ohoho if I will bring a love tryangle in my story >:)

[@CruelestChris]

From my point of view, good writing is evil!

[@666melodeath666]

Rivals are about How Loud you can Scream each other names *SASUKE!!* *NARUTO!!* *TETSUO!!* *KANEDA!!* *Dinkleberg.......*

[@The_Big_Jay]

Reading that, I could see the mouth movements in my mind

[@30alex30clubpenguin]

666melodeath666 *Deku*

[@nottherealpaulsmith]

canada?

[@mason8467]

GRIFFITH!!

[@legreatpenguino445]

**KAKAROT!**

[@CruelestChris]

Inner critic doesn't have a small scar to totally explain how he survived being killed. Bro do you even writing.

[@ezelfrancisco1349]

CruelestChris Inconsistency is JP's best friend

[@agustinmarcelosuarezquilis7264]

I thought that his best friend was the love triangle?

[@CruelestChris]

His best friends are inconsistency AND the love triangle and he just can't decide between them!

[@SuperBatSpider]

CruelestChris He can't be damadged. He's a thought being his INNER critic

[@ginge641]

CruelestChris A love triangle within a love triangle. Is that a love nonagon, or a love triangular prism?

[@ajduong]

"The rival wants to defeat the hero because... He's strong and... " By God, you just described half of shounen anime

[@faridaoba]

There are some good shounen rivals

[@TheDr502]

That trope was pioneered by the likes of Vegeta and Sasuke.

[@java1.130]

HERPy derpy Sasuke popularized it due to how perfectly he fits the role, but he didn’t pioneer it

[@TheDr502]

Java 1.1 Hmm, true. They didn’t pioneer it. I’ll say that Vegeta and Sasuke popularized that trope in shounen anime.

[@java1.130]

HERPy derpy Sasuke is the most prominent example in the US, but in Japan it’s clear that Sasuke was inspired by Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho.

[@SultanOfAwesomeness]

The levels of self awareness in this video are staggering.

[@nottherealpaulsmith]

no there's just a group of people who show up everywhere

[@squigor3566]

they are

[@voivodadracula1936]

333

[@chrissonofpear1384]

It's over 9000!

[@emceemunchapussy1891]

It gets old kinda quick

[@Ultrapyre]

Amusingly, Inner Critic works great as a rival in this context because while he has some good points, his delivery is dull and boring. While our resident Terrible Writer is great at delivery but his advice is.... *looks at channel name* yeah, checks out.

[@controlequebrado4455]

too meta now if you excuse me I'm going back to reality *literally breaks 4th wall*

[@Freefork]

That is what adds to their dynamics. I wish the Inner Critic was female so the rival can play into gender stereotyping. :D

[@lahlybird895]

I liked his delivery

[@permafrost8322]

Also if you notice IC’s background is clean and straight, while, TWA’s background is blobs floating in random patterns

[@lahlybird895]

@@permafrost8322 That makes perfect sense. I bet That's how their brains work.

[@quanrock2897]

“The rival should always lose, but still be taken seriously by others for some reason” Kylo ren popped into my head. 😂

[@luizfelipevbf5567]

Why do you think they brought Palpatine back and killed Hux? After TLJ neither Hux nor Kylo are intimidating at all.

[@scottgaultney]

@@luizfelipevbf5567 Kylo hasn't been intimidating since The Force Awakens, where our hero, who'd never held a sword, much less a lightsaber, before schools our big bad villain, a trained warrior, in a one-on-one swordfight. TLJ and RotP just cement that he's not intimidating due to him repeatedly getting beaten and humiliated by our heroes.

[@TheDr502]

More like Cry-lo Ren (Hardy har har). Seriously, that guy is just a Darth-Vader wannabe. Lamest Star Wars villain of all time.

[@MadTheDJ]

Vader kept losing, too. Ep III: gets his limbs cut off and left for dead by Obi-Wan. Forced to become a cyborg abomination. Rogue One: kills some rebels, but fails to stop the plans being given to Leia and the Tantive IV escaping Scariff. Ep IV: fails to stop Leia's plan to get the DS schematics to Obi-Wan. Fails to actually defeat Obi-Wan (Ben let him kill him, and even then, Ben became one with the Force). Failed to stop Luke blowing up the Death Star. Ep V: fails to convince Luke to join him and fails to stop the Falcon's escape. Ep VI: fails to turn Luke (again) and is defeated in lightsaber combat by Luke. Ultimately defeated by Anakin reasserting his Light Side. Tell me again how he was a rival badass? I'll wait.

[@angrypepe7615]

@@scottgaultney on the bright side he's the only character that had any semblance of a character arc and was probably the only consistent thing throughout the trilogy.

[@DetectiveNyx]

"That (appearance) is the worst way to start making a character" *whistles and kicks entire cast under a doormat*

[@pixelpudding3914]

Oh hi! Love ur vids!

[@pickyphysicsstudent201]

@Tommaso Stefanelli I think the best way to make a character is to simultaneously design all aspects (clothes, personality, abilities, attributes, motives, etc) as you develop the plot......... The problem is that this only works in idealistic situations where everything goes perfectly and there are no needs for revisions mid-way through a project. You can't upscale something that deep in. Some characters are made on a whim. Honestly, just do what comes natural but if you go too far into one extreme, take a step back to evaluate things.

[@cosmicspacething3474]

I just switch between character and design as I’m in the creating process.

[@HOLDENPOPE]

Me who decides what the character will likely be like as I'm designing them: *UNLIMITED POWAH--*

[@narnia1233]

Well, I wouldn’t say that always applies. C.S. Lewis said the start of his Narnia series began all after he imagined a faun with an umbrella walking in the snow carrying packages by a lantern. And he literally built a whole story and world after imagining that character and scene. My dad says he writes his books the same way. He says he imagines scenes first-for him, he says it’s like watching a movie scene. And then if he loves a scene a lot, he creates a whole story around it gradually. Until it all fits and is good. I think this guy has a video explaining how there’s different types of writers. Those that are more analytical and like to plot out everything. And there’s writers who are “discovery” types who imagine scenes and then work to make a story around the scene that originally inspired them. (And yeah some of the most famous writers are basically the discovery type, J.K. Rowling was the same. She said she imagined a scene (I forget which one) and over time built a story around it. So, yeah, if you’re imagining a very cinematic scene that you think is just great and in that scene it happens to have a character with a design in it-I wouldn’t discard it. Again some of the most beloved stories were inspired in that way. Of course everyone can improve. Good luck.

[@nocktukdaze8256]

Inner Critic vs JP Top 10 Anime Rivals

[@justafaniv1097]

Now we just need one more to be the target of their affections and the triangle can be complete!

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

Nocktuk Daze, Top 10 Anime Crossovers.

[@emilianorios4761]

Justafan IV it's of course mary sue

[@jonsnor4313]

Like naruto, or twilight the male actors compensate for kristen stewards lack of, especially when they are in a scen together, when they are supposed to hate each other)

[@PanfuSerenity]

Ned Barks I remember I once wrote a short story (inspired by the Terrible Writing Advice about paranormal romance or whatever it was) where the hopeless romantic vampire and the down-to-earth lumberjack werewolf both grow tired of the can't-make-a-choice-destiny-fate-fairyfluff-bullshit heroine, and decide to ditch her altogether and go kick the dystopian vampire government's ass.

[@ImperatorSupreme]

Even the backgrounds symbolize these two authors opposing characters, the white and grey background of the Inner Critic is filled with straight lines and right angles, showing the ordered nature of his work. While our usual hosts grey and black his filled with splotches following no particular pattern, showing the disordered nature of his work. Great stuff!

[@happykidtvforkids6498]

Cewl

[@vale3242]

either way it's as entertaining as the video itself

[@aris1869]

I like to imagine the splotches are floating plot holes from previous videos

[@liveatlast4759]

@@aris1869 HC Accepted!

[@bobmcguffin5706]

Honestly one of my favourite video's TWA's done

[@implodingcolon1058]

'You cannot solve every writing problem with a love triangle.' Every YA author ever: 'Hold my beer.'

[@skree272]

YA?

[@XYZBlaster]

kapitan komatii.videos YA= Young Adult. Fiction aimed at young adults and teens must have an obligatory love triangles regardless of story. The story could be set in a distopic 3rd world hellhole with vampire zombies terrorizing the land and they still will be talking 90% about their crush on the boy the like or something

[@skree272]

@@XYZBlaster ah ok, i mostly read sailing novels,

[@ikeriro2650]

@@valhatan3907 thats why I loved Six of crows, no romance until the very end, no love triangles

[@Air_Serpent]

Iker Maldonado and then there’s Shadow and Bone. Leigh Bardugo really changed.

[@Irondrone4]

We cannot escape the Love Triangle. It is everywhere. We can burn it, but it arises from the ashes. We can drown it, but it swims back to shore. We can nuke it from orbit...but they'll just make a sequel. There is only the Triangle.

[@tiagodarkpeasant]

i hate it the most when they do it when there is not a triangle in the source

[@justsomecreatureofthisearth]

Irondrone4 Yes, but do you know that... the triangle is the symbol for the Illuminati. The ever present love triangle is actually a means to subliminally coerce us to love them, therefore submit to them willingly. That's why love triangles are in everything these days. Illuminati confirmed. Also lizard people. Aliens too.

[@ultrariley7580]

just some creature of this earth Robots as well?

[@justsomecreatureofthisearth]

Ultra Riley yes, robots too and they will take over the world, helped by aliens. And chupacabras. But those won't take over the world, they will just suck our blood.

[@emilycaballero6052]

...illuminati confirmed?

[@naturalist4life396]

"You cannot solve every writing problem with a love triangle!" Miraculous Ladybug: Tiens Ma Biere

[@geniusgamer3840]

Hahaha *no* Miraculous Ladybug has a love _dodecahedron_

[@elementalsgami1]

@@geniusgamer3840 [insert Love Myriagon]

[@geniusgamer3840]

@@elementalsgami1 lOvE GiGaGOn

[@littletravelblog7589]

That one's so accurate 😂

[@ziimulhah3223]

Love hexagon To solve this matter, I unironically ship Lukadrigaminette

[@junjunjamore7735]

_Oh no! Which boring, one dimensional cardboard cutout will I choose?_

[@EvilDrHousegaming]

LUCKY THERE ARE THOUSANDS!!!

[@timoylumontad3920]

Man, that's one savage roast

[@lonestarr1490]

I love how his own characters are annoyed as fuck by the situations he put them in.

[@shadysam7161]

Skyrim marriage.

[@jessicamartin1160]

@@shadysam7161 🙄

[@ginge641]

An incompetent "rival" could be used in a serious way, too. For example, their constant defeat could drive them to anger, desperate measures and cruelty. Eventually, the hero could notice what the rival has become and their own role in making them this way, when they never paid them much attention.

[@Former_Halo_Fan]

That just makes the rival sound extremely petty, vindictive, and childish. It's hard to feel sympathetic for someone who is only evil because he can't accept that somebody is better than him at something. The hero blaming themself for the rival's transformation also makes little sense, because they are not responsible for decisions that someone else willingly made, and their thought process ends up being along the lines of "He couldn't handle my perfection, this is all my fault..." These sorts of stories also tend to end with the rival either being coddled or destroyed. If they are coddled and forgiven, they end up reverting back to their "good" ways, but it doesn't feel deserved because there was no justification for their turn in the first place. If they are destroyed, the hero will feel bad, and that basically ends up being the rival's main contribution to the story: to make the hero feel bad for something they have no reason to feel bad for. Either way, it doesn't actually contribute much to the story, and will leave many people scratching their heads in confusion.

[@CombatSportsNerd]

@Darkness Reign Except Vegeta's reasons aren't stupid given the context of his race, upbringing, and the fact he was evil AF from the moment he was introduced. Plus he was never incompetent, the guy was going to kill Goku in their 1st fight. The type of rival the OP brought up and Vegeta are 2 different characters. One is shitty and the other is an Anime icon

[@CombatSportsNerd]

@@Former_Halo_Fan THANK U! I hate that shit

[@CombatSportsNerd]

@Darkness Reign Vegeta has won before. He completely demolished Goku in their first fight. He literally broke that Man's legs. Remove Krillin and Gohan from the equation and Goku would have died. That's why people take Vegeta seriously because he was a legitimate threat and challenge who could keep up with the protagonist even when it seems like it's impossible to stay in Goku's league. The kind of rival you're defending is a total joke and a perfect example of garbage writing

[@CombatSportsNerd]

@Darkness Reign If he doesn't rival the protagonist consistently he isn't a rival to begin with. Just a repetitive nuisance at best and a waste of screen time at worst. Vegeta works as a rival because he is in Goku's ballpark of power 90% of the time.

[@ryanklatt9925]

So basically its an anime

[@faridaoba]

Ryan Klatt some anime has some really great rivals

[@java1.130]

A Shonen anime

[@paulo2a6]

Melchi qwq There ain’t no rivals in Jojo except Ceasar

[@pacoramon9468]

Sounds just like Dio vs Jonatham.

[@paulo2a6]

paco ramon yeah but dio is more than a rival to Jonathan, he’s more of just The Bad Guy

[@toasty_mann]

Haven’t even seen it and I expect love triangles.

[@namingisdifficult408]

Greasy Gabe you were right !

[@popstarchamp]

Does this mean J.P. is secretly in love with his Inner Critic? His ego really is big.😜

[@spicysquire3521]

I read this comment right before they started talking about it lol

[@prome57]

Greasy Gabe you can't write a story without the love triangle! Blasphemy!

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

Greasy Gabe, Rival Love Triangles......

[@timothymclean]

Inner Critic has good points, but a really bad way of expressing them. JP is good at expressing points, but only has bad ones. If only they could combine their strengths, they could be the ultimate editor...or at least a pretty good one.

[@LuizAlexPhoenix]

No, [character] is non relatable to me. Therefore, [other character] is obviously better.

[@Nionivek]

Inner Critic speaks a lot in absolutes so every time he speaks I go "Well this isn't true, I've seen this done lots of time" for example... Gundam... The fact that Char can't possibly defeat the hero never becomes an issue. As well the differences in Rivals is one thing, but their similarities can be just as important if not more typically. As well the Rival always losing doesn't mean he isn't taken seriously so long as what had to be done to get the victory is well known.

[@emilianorios4761]

They need to dbz fuse

[@timothymclean]

Nionivek I mean, both sides do that. Both sides make absolute statements about the best way to write a story.

[@thecoolcario9048]

I understood the inner critic perfectly well in his expression

[@teawithliya]

"The rivals always lose, but everyone still takes them seriously for some reason." This reminds me of Mario. He always manages to defeat the turtle kingdom, but it is still feared by everyone for some reason - in fact, no one else dates to fight the turtles but Mario. Maybe he's the Chosen One! Don't even think about bringing up a love triangle...

[@cosmicspacething3474]

Mario Peach and Bowser

[@jackmakila3776]

Mario,wario,peach, and browser Know what throw Luigi and daisy in there to

[@rainbowthedragoncat6768]

@@jackmakila3776 My favorite villain, Internet Explorer

[@MrAuthor3DS]

{cough} Super Princess Peach.

[@tomvandalen2212]

My head cannon for this is that 99% of peaches TOADstool kingdom is toads. The most useless things ever and that's why Mario keeps having to run in. Toads are probably great at peace-activities which is why they keep getting invaded in the first place.

[@sweatysocks8214]

Noooo I can't take it. Actually good writing advice. It hurts. Make it stop.

[@oof-rr5nf]

Pietree lol 😂

[@ezelfrancisco1349]

Quick, get the love triangle

[@d4n737]

My only... One of few weakneses! -Dark lands in fantasy worlds -Shity jumpscares - Mean atheists on the internet -Good writing advice - Tickling Rly tho The dark lands one: "HMM where do I want to make my evil empire capital. The elves have a ton of recources to maintain it and the Backstory Ruinland may have a usefull Mcguffin, NAH LESS'GO TO THE WASTELAND! THIS IS A GOOD ECONOMICAL DECISION!!!"

[@EvilDrHousegaming]

what are these replies?

[@firockfinion3326]

Don't forget when the story treats the rival as if he's the jerk and everything he does has an ulterior motive, even when the actions he's taking are actually completely reasonable if you were to stop and think about them for a bit.

[@thirdplanet4471]

Firock Finion And when the story glosses over the hero weaknesses/selfishness and treats him like a saint no matter what he does

[@Necroscrow]

My apologies, unrelated but is that...a slorg?

[@firockfinion3326]

Reverse Dipper Pines, ah yes, that too. Necroscrow, yes, yes it is. A slorg wearing kamina shades.

[@thesupremegentlemanatheist7382]

Yu-Gi-Oh?

[@RoronoaZoro-ur6hr]

TheSupremeGentlemanAtheist Yu-Gi-Oh season 0 actually explained perfectly why Yugi and Kaiba were both rivals because they were both serial killers all the way back to Ancient Egypt.

[@Der.Kleine.General]

The only reason to add a rival is that fangirls can write yaoi fanfiction.

[@anasmohammed5415]

Oh no

[@emberrose3229]

ummm....guilty lol

[@approximateCognition]

We wouldn't dare...

[@swanandab2484]

In Harry Potter Hero: Black hair, Green eyes Rival: Blonde Hair, Grey eyes *Malfoy* : I am better than you *Harry* : How? *Malfoy* : I have Tom Felton, I cried in the bathroom once, I tried to crucio you but the movies LOVE me so they left that, and you did sectumsempra, jerk! I have more fangirls and also, I have more FaNfIcTiOn, I am a 'bad boy' and I am more good looking, people ship me with Hermione, an Apple, Pansy Astoria etc *Harry* : tf Hermione hates you *Malfoy* : They also ship me with YOU *Harry* : ...............

[@shadysam7161]

HOLY SHIT ITS DI RAVELLO FROM JUST CAUSE 3!

[@lastthursdayism]

YOU CANNOT SOLVE EVERY PROBLEM WITH A LOVE TRIANGLE!

[@marley7868]

but you can with murder

[@awkwardlycompatible3195]

Oops, try again!

[@thepixelatedgirl4741]

JuniperTheSkyWing wanna bet?

[@348joey]

Blasphemy!

[@Megafreakx3]

Try saying that to the hundred of millions of fanfiction...

[@SharpDesign]

Our battles quickly got more elaborate. He would win some, I would ALMOST win others! He took the name: Metro Man, defender of Metro City. I decided to pick something a little more humble: Megamind, incredibly handsome criminal genius and master of all villainy!

[@guilhermeevangelista5110]

Best rivalry ever

[@BoisegangGaming]

That's one of my favorite superhero movies ever.

[@johnthecrazed5679]

I love Megamind.

[@franziska9260]

Ah, my favourite movie

[@tudoraragornofgreyscot8482]

The best Disney movie. ;]

[@oliviaharris8526]

...The rivals seem pretty romanticly interested in each other.

[@johnthecrazed5679]

I like the pen of the Inner Critic, it means that all the mistakes he makes are permanent and clear to see. While JP can make changes until he has the perfect story and pretend that nothing went wrong.

[@connorschultz380]

But what dose JP stand for?

[@mat8791]

@@connorschultz380 "Joseph Beaubien (J.P Beaubien) the creator of terrible writing advice/Aeon Legion"

[@legrandliseurtri7495]

@@connorschultz380 Read his book. It's good:)

[@connorschultz380]

@Instrumentality1000 why did you reply that to me?

[@dmas7749]

and white shirts stain easier, which also supports him having his flaws on display SYMBOLISM? In TWA canon? Its more likely than you think.

[@marlom7882]

Has it really been 30 videos already? Time flies

[@namingisdifficult408]

Deity Saturn indeed it does

[@ComedyLoverGirl]

Yeah, and almost 200k subscribers! Congrats, JP!

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

Deity Saturn, The more Videos the better.

[@bloodfiredrake7259]

wait it's been 30?

[@glanni]

I've been following him from the very beginning. Can't believe it's so many. But yeah: more TWA videos = Better.

[@Eemi_Seppala]

Both of the examples sound like so many anime rivals.

[@faridaoba]

Eemi Seppälä there are some good anime rivals

[@pizzasheriff3562]

@@faridaoba Keyword: "so many"

[@samuelkiernan2740]

Fairytale is this to a T

[@justafaniv1097]

Seriously though, why DOES the letter "Z" stand for sleeping? TWA, asking the real questions since 2018.

[@ng.tr.s.p.1254]

Justafan IV Probably because other letter can't do that ?

[@shrimpin4145]

If other letters can't do that, why choose the most obscure one to indicate sleeping sound? Z is really sharp, which isn't something I imagine under the word sleeping. Something like S would be better. It's not as sharp as Z, is more mellow, and still kinda fits the Z theme.

[@dmwanderer9454]

"Because the letter Z vaguely resembles an electrical wave, and humans seen out brainwaves when they sleep."

[@krzysztofbandyk168]

But humans thik more intensly when they are awake.

[@dmwanderer9454]

Krzysztof Bandyk idk man. Some dude 500 years ago did it, so now we do.

[@franziska9260]

I love the Inner Critic. Just saying.

[@franziska9260]

"Unless your poor editing skills are at work again"

[@thefableparable215]

He's somewhat of a smartass but I still love him

[@jonsnor4313]

Like him too, lets revive him with the power of fan comments.

[@Firestar4041]

I'll get the satanic circles setup!

[@plasmawolf7960]

What if the hero and rival DON’T hate each other, but just serve different factions with slightly differing ideologies that compete in the political landscape. The decisions are made over their heads, they have to follow orders. They’re not so different, just from different places. Also, do you think it is a bad thing if the rival actually OUTCLASSES the hero?

[@Kaefer1973]

In a types of stories, like sports dramas, the rival can even be on the same side/in the same team, both for a friendly or antagonistic rivalry even.

[@thejonbrownshow8470]

Only rival that comes close to that is probably trails of cold steel 2 (with half the plot revolving around the rival character), tho for as long as the games are, they kinda border on not giving the rival enough screentime to understand his motives fully as much as we do the everyman protagonist 😂

[@thejonbrownshow8470]

@@free_palestine786 I never actually watched that show(or much of tv, I'm more a gaming oriented fellow, but do that series have a game just curious 😅?)

[@filmandfirearms]

T-34 was a great example of this. Klaus Jäger was a great rival to Ivushkin. While there was the usual theme of opposites, on a deeper level, both men exist to represent their country. Ivushkin is aggressive, stubborn, and is loyal to both his men and his country to the death. He makes many decisions based on instinct rather than careful, methodical planning. He also doesn't care if he dies, so long as he dies fighting. Basically the quintessential Russian. Jäger, on the other hand is clever, calculating, almost mechanical at times. He never makes any decision without carefully considering and weighing all possible options. He also won't hesitate to take control of the situation when needed, sometimes literally, like when his gunner is wounded and he hops into the gunner's seat himself, and sometimes figuratively, challenging Ivushkin to a duel rather than fighting in the chaotic and winding streets, where Ivushkin has an advantage with his smaller, lighter vehicle and more aggressive nature. That also ties into the other traditionally Germanic aspect of his personality. His sense of honor. Not only did he challenge Ivushkin to a duel to gain an advantage, but also to settle the rivalry that had been going since 1941. The entire reason the movie happened. He couldn't just kill Ivushkin outright, it wouldn't be honorable. No, he had to have a formal challenge

[@mvmsma]

In Pokemon, Ash spent the whole series trying to defeat Gary only to have his ass kicked, each time in a different way.

[@C_to_the_S]

I’m really liking inner critic. He adds more to the vid like the guy who is level headed, trying to keep the dimwit from destroying anything.

[@ar9907]

i like his face when he holds up his pen

[@jonsnor4313]

His phrase to critizice jp editing skills is hillarous.

[@akromakroma]

Rivals...in love? Sounds like a job for the Love Triangle!

[@Megafreakx3]

sounds more like Fanfictions if you ask me

[@jonsnor4313]

Griffith likely swings both ways and spares him, and thinks about so go.

[@hineraable]

"Having rivals become romantically interested into each other may be interesting". Me: E X A C T L Y

[@sunnyscript1224]

Yes ! That's what i am saying.

[@user-pn4ck4nh8n]

How?

[@fulana_de_tal]

@@user-pn4ck4nh8n never read enemies to lovers? It is some good stuff when done well

[@Speed_Zamaa]

Well it depends on how you write it and how the characters interact with each other (or even with the secondary characters) and bla bla bla

[@KevinCow]

Wow, I think you're the first KZbinr to figure out a way to make me actually want to watch the sponsor bit at the end.

[@germanvisitor2]

Ever seen one of Lindybeige's videos?

[@CharliMorganMusic]

Kevin Stevens he really is

[@almostevery5422]

Jacksfilms?

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

Kevin Stevens, You didn’t know? Each video is designed to brainwash us so we come back for more......

[@Jebu911]

I like jacksfilms but I only liked the Audible sponsor parts in yaiy. Other ones are pretty tame

[@msjkramey]

I do prefer pure sarcasm over actual advice

[@fyrefrost1898]

J Girl the advice is that you do the exact opposite of what he says

[@popstarchamp]

J Girl But there's NOOO way that hearing the opposite of something good in a joking tone or manner will let you decipher it's real meaning. That's ABSOLUTELY impossible. No waaayyyyyyy...(wink wink)

[@roseykat8847]

I liked the two characters together.

[@Icetea-2000]

Me too but I think it’s to mock the people in the audience that take TWA seriously

[@pokegon100]

J Girl meh, I actually prefer the more straightforward advice.

[@XellosNi]

"I should start with how they look!" "Oh that is the worst way to start making a character." You'd be surprised how well this actually kind of works.

[@omniscientcammaleon9477]

i thought starting a characher with how they look is better if is only half paragraph long since, how could you imagine a character if you dont even know how they look.

[@herrscherofsweets9583]

@@omniscientcammaleon9477 have you ever picked up a novel in your life?

[@omniscientcammaleon9477]

@@herrscherofsweets9583 is it THAT wrong? :(

[@omniscientcammaleon9477]

@@herrscherofsweets9583 Well i mean i have read quite some novels, and i think they had like that half or less of paragraph to describe the character, i dont mean its good to just go "btw he has a green and a blue eye, he this, and this, and this, and this" I mean you should say how it looks but vaguely, so your reader has an idea of how the character looks.

[@herrscherofsweets9583]

@@omniscientcammaleon9477 well what if the charater is a shapeless blob of flesh?

[@HxH2011DRA]

That sponsor was even smoother than the last one my god XD! And they're having ARCS!!! IN THE SPONSORSHIPS!!!!!! Dark Lord vs Secret Society head guy next time??? Also the like button will always defeat its rival on your channel!

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

The Hunter x Hunter 2011 Dickriding Association, I liked this Video 4 Times.

[@ShroomRPG]

My dude, how are you everywhere on KZbin? First saw you on Hunter x Hunter music, then on political videos, anime reviewers, now here.

[@HxH2011DRA]

Dewayne C I go where ToGODshi guides me

[@ShroomRPG]

Then again I say this, and i've been called out for being seen everywhere on YT as well loooool.

[@HxH2011DRA]

Dewayne C Yea you're quite prolific yourself XD

[@aeiouiji]

This series has really improved. I liked the animation improvements. The mouths, subtle movements, all really a good touch.

[@slevinchannel7589]

Rivals were OUTSTANDIGLY done by the Manga ‚Lazy Nobleman becomes Strongest Swordsman’. I cant gush enough about it: it genuinly sprurised me in a genuine way.

[@YaBoiDoi]

"The rival's is actually being more of a character than the hero! What the heck can we do? I know! Make him a villan!"

[@slevinchannel7589]

'Naturalistic Storytelling' was covered extremly-well by Hbomberguy in his Video 'RWBY is Dissapointing' starting at Minute 35, proving that Krimson Rogue Fans, Hello Future Me-Fans and Telltale Foundry-Fans should not just obviously check-out each-other (cause the named channel are very similar and all 'smart Fun') but should check out Hbomberguys channel. And heres the craziest thing: i will comment this often under each of these Channels in a vague Hope to spread Fun and share Knowledge, OBVIOUSLY risking to be mistaken for a B0T. Thats how much i love the IDEA that maybe someone gets in love to Literature thx to Me.

[@YaBoiDoi]

@@slevinchannel7589 so you're not a bot.

[@slevinchannel7589]

@@YaBoiDoi Test me.

[@YaBoiDoi]

@@slevinchannel7589 Damn.

[@slevinchannel7589]

@@YaBoiDoi ?

[@heidifedor]

Do they fight over Mary Sue, setting up the love triangle?

[@petitio_principii]

The rival gets together with Mary Sue's rival in the end, that's better.

[@PokeAndDestroy]

They fight over Mary Sue for the sake of a love triangle but in the end they truly loved each other for the sake of fanfiction

[@cesarvera2198]

KoyKoy I think all love triangles should end with either a poly relationship or they don’t pick one and the rivals date each other

[@scottmantooth8785]

@@petitio_principii *one rival sacrifices himself at the very last moment in a desperate futile charge against the antagonist giving the other the opportunity to strike the fatal blow that dramatically ends the conflict and instantly restores peace and harmony to the kingdom ...leading to a long romantic and sweaty embrace between the Alpha Male/Chosen One™ and the Mary Sue™ in the middle of the very messy battle ground surrounded by corpses and the writhing and screaming wounded...both agree that the other rival was in fact an honorable and noble individual whose house and lands should be restored to his surviving clan and later name their firstborn after them...who then years later turns to the Dark Side of the Force™ setting up the foundation for the continuation of the would be trilogy and spin-off prequels*

[@Macey88]

Can you do a murder mystery terrible writing advice? Please 😊

[@anaalicia2750]

Eruintiel Greenleaf THIS!

[@ninjabluefyre3815]

The detective with a monocle and weird floppy hat because we've only heard of Sherlock Holmes and not Charlie Chan, Sam Spade, Nick and Nora Charles, Poirot, or even Miss Marple despite them being recognizable classics.

[@codylakin288]

Or the James Patterson technique. Why write your own books? Just have the same dumb ideas over and over and pay people to write them for you, but put your name on it to make money!

[@jamestang1227]

The murderer should be obvious within the first 2 seconds of meeting him due to either wearing dark clothes, leather, a monocle, having a cat, a cigar or all of the above.

[@DarthBiomech]

The murder should be a nonsensical and convoluted, as if it was designed to be mysterious, and victim and murderer cooperated for it to happen. Murderer also should be a totaly random character, because in murder mysteries guilty is always the one that nobody suspects. Oh, and it should be called "murder on the orient express", because we don't have enough rehashes of old stories yet.

[@thekaticorn99]

Inner Critic: you cannot solve every writing problem with a love triangle JP: hold my pencil

[@buttrockman4578]

This is easily my favorite episode of Terrible Writing Advice so far. The writing, the comedy, the tropes covered, and the entertainment value were all perfect. Also, if JP himself did the voice for the inner critic, well done, the voice was fantastic.

[@outeremissary4438]

I love how bored the love interest looks. Perhaps she knows that she can never rival the unintentionally intense bromance of our shonen heroes. Seriously though, what's the deal with rivals having more chemistry than actual romantic pairs in so many things Gotta say, sometimes the fangirls are just right...

[@louisaniathemagnificent8246]

Eric Gardner it's because usually the story focuses more on the main characters than the relationship between a main character and their love interest. If the MC and their love interest don't have chemistry and the story only focuses on their romance and not their relationship and how it developed, I lose interest immediately.

[@DataDrain02]

Well I mean... if you think about it. Writing a rival isn't that different than writing romance. Since both have one rule in common.... "Opposites attract". When you have two characters that are SO opposite. But, complement each other so well, and have the potential to make them stronger together.... I mean, that's usually what most rivals end up being if you think about it. Now, a lot of time, they usually don't go too far with this. But sometimes the interactions are.... Well, let's just say it's easy to see why shippers sail their ships. (Only for canon to sink them.)

[@louisaniathemagnificent8246]

_Data_Drain_ "Opposites attract" isn't the key point in romance, though. It's not about opposing traits or views, it's about complimenting each other. I don't believe in "opposites attract" because by that kind of logic I, an introvert, should be attracted to extroverts, which is not true. A good person, by that logic, should be attracted to a bad person, which is also not true and makes little sense. However, an excitable and outgoing person - A- can be attracted to a calm and controlled person - B- but note that B isn't quiet or shy or something. In this case, I wouldn't call them opposites attract because their traits compliment each other (This applies if they can tolerate each other). I think, in the end, it boils down to whether or not the two can tolerate each other when they have opposing traits or beliefs, but that doesn't mean you HAVE to find someone who opposes your beliefs or some of your traits. That's just false. Rivalry works in the same way, but it depends on what kind of rivalry we're talking about.

[@petite-beefcakes]

6:58 homoeroticism + rivals becoming romantic partners.... This is fanfic fuel in a nutshell.

[@Liliana_the_ghost_cat]

Yes, it's perfect yaoi fuel

[@wren_.]

this is literally just enemies to lovers

[@Light-at-Dawn]

If you have ever been in a MHA chat, You will be surprised how much that can escalate

[@sladikk]

*_WE'RE NOT SO DIFFERENT YOU AND I_*

[@aaronlaluzerne6639]

sladikk you have no idea how many tv shows and movies had used this line.

[@sladikk]

WE'RE NOTHING ALIKE!

[@oblivionskeepsake7000]

sladikk you have your law degree, and me? i’ve got all this fucking markers

[@KayeGruul]

Trying to figure out why people represent sleep/snoring as Z’s was a surprisingly deep rabbit hole. As far as I can tell, some German comics back in the 1910’s/1920’s used z to mimic snoring. The “zet” Sound they made portrayed both the initial buzzing and abrupt stop of a snore well enough to be considered onomatopoeia. This symbol was then able to adapt into English comics, seeing how the buzzing was still present in the English pronunciation (zed and zee depending on accent). So it seems it’s origins stem from comic artists looking for an easy out when it came to portraying sleep. TL;DR: So “zzz” is essentially just an easy way to describe sleep because it vaguely sounds like multiple snores based on it’s literal pronunciation.

[@ssdestroyah3919]

Interesting

[@nicdarling7516]

Scott Rankin Cool dat

[@randomcringeyyoutuber6750]

The terrible advice literally reminded me of the sonic and shadow rivalry... Remember that?

[@TheDr502]

Oh boy, Shadow the Hedgehog. Fangirls tend to get sweaty and turned on every time Shadow shows up on screen, despite him being a cartoon hedgehog who resembles Mickey Mouse (i.e., not human). So creepy...

[@randomcringeyyoutuber6750]

@@TheDr502 I know right

[@TheDr502]

@@randomcringeyyoutuber6750 People just can't get enough of antiheroes.

[@akioasakura9540]

Sonic is the ultimate life form

[@sodaftpm185]

@@randomcringeyyoutuber6750 Is Shadow even a good rival?

[@jnine8828]

I actually really like the inner critic character, i hope he won't disappear after being defeated

[@ThingsStuffington]

Of course not! He'll just wind up on the sidelines, constantly cheering on JP and talking about how much better he is than him.

[@tiagodarkpeasant]

and ocasionaly show up to lose, ad inflate main character's ego

[@m4r_art]

i am the light! you are the darkness! fire vs ice! coke vs pepsi!

[@exumbra1399]

... I'm assuming the last set is sarcasm.

[@kh2war]

M4R Dr. Pepper

[@calamusgladiofortior2814]

KHwar If you add Dr. Pepper, it becomes a love triangle ;)

[@kh2war]

Arthur Williams Gad. Dangit.

[@myohmy9000]

I’m guessing Mountain Dew is that shitty comic relief?

[@dorothygale9648]

Oh, please. There's no WAY Ego JP knows a word like "infinitesimal."

[@faridaoba]

Dorothy Gale what’s jp

[@dorothygale9648]

@@faridaoba JP. It's his name.

[@nottherealpaulsmith]

KRABS! PLANKTON! *KRABS!* *PLANKTON!* spongebob

[@popstarchamp]

Paul Smith Yellow! Pink!

[@libtardkiller8568]

Spongebob Squidward

[@ezelfrancisco1349]

Paul Smith DONKEY

[@thecomplicatedlife6968]

Henry McKnight damn it. Beat me to it.

[@limekarp9853]

*WALUIGI TIME*

[@jamcdonald120]

hey look, fairy tail summarized!

[@brandonontama2415]

Man, Gray was treated like garbage.

[@schnocksej.6774]

Lol, thats exactly was I thought 30 secs into the Video XD

[@sarafontanini7051]

and Naruto and Sasuke too!

[@SennaHawx]

Sara Fontanini Nah. Naruto and Sasuke were actually equals

[@jedyzichterman358]

jamcdonald120 the "fight" natsu had with gray was so disappointing lmao

[@analyzgolden7774]

"Oh no! Which boring, one dimensional cardboard cutout will I choose?" 😂 I'm a writer, and I love your background gags so much

[@mas8705]

I'm seeing alot of Naruto and Sasuke in the comments. Meanwhile, I'm here screaming, "GRIFFITH!!! GUTS!!!"

[@classarank7youtubeherokeyb63]

I was thinking that Vegeta hits every single one of those traits at some point. All it was missing was the rival getting his ass handed to him by the villain to establish that he can beat someone "as strong as the protagonist."

[@raulrojas9253]

but griffith and guts arent rivals at all. They didnt compete against each other only 2 times the 1st time griffith won and the 2nd time guts won and them well eclipse yada yada yada Guts got crippled deprestion and griffth die and in his place Femto was born and since them they interactions have been kept to a minimun with guts not being near at the same level as griffith in neither power, conviction or "morals" ( because griffith angelic look is a lie) So how are they rivals? They were Friends or rather they began as 2 people that just fough, became friends and them Enemies there is no sign of rival in there at all.

[@theradionicrevival8068]

Class A, Rank 7; KZbin Hero: Keyboard Warrior while kinda true its not entirely fair because vegeta didnt really start teaming up with goku and fighting alongside him as an equal/friend until like the buu saga The freeza saga doesn’t really count cause he wasnt fighting alongside goku and because he only really did it because it was the only way anything else would’ve killed him Hence why in the android/cell saga he does a lot of shit on his own mainly

[@paulenan9636]

mas8705 I do not think this is a rivalry. First, they were best buds. Then mortal enemies.

[@Lugbzurg]

Griffith is Guts' NEMESIS, not necessarily his rival.

[@scapeghost4212]

Jp just wrote naruto in 10 minutes

[@DerangedAvenger]

Nah, if he wrote Naruto, it would have the rival besting the hero constantly until their final battle, which ends in a tie but the rival begrudgingly saying 'you won', which means the hero won even though he didn't.

[@fightingmedialounge519]

No, it would be the hero winning sometimes, the rival winning other times, and the author being ambiguous about it other times for the sake of keeping fans happy.

[@scottmantooth8785]

that's talent there...real talent...the power of the love triangle has been thwarted by superior skill and extreme cleverness

[@treythegamerwolf551]

This dragonball

[@skelly1555]

Did we watch the same Naruto? I seem to remember Sasuke never acknowledging Naruto as a rival and the necessity for his affection being Naruto's driving force. Naruto becomes more and more powerful because he so desperately wants Sasuke to see him as an equal. At the same time, Sasuke is constantly trying to rival his older brother. In the end, Sasuke finally admits that Naruto is powerful, but still not strong enough and he whoops his ass. Naruto is the protagonist of the story. Naruto is the one chasing after Sasuke, not the other way around.

[@gso619]

"You can't simply prop up characters with fancy powers and cool swords." Boy, wait till you hear about this thing called "anime".

[@Krysnha]

Yes is becoming worst and worst, from intricate characters, with motives and acutal story, to a bunch of shonen and isekai, even when they try satire of that, fails

[@inspectorjavert8443]

I really need to get a hobby because I'm about to force symbolism on the rivals at 1:58. The Hero Wears white, a symbol of purity perhaps but also a very obvious color, it would stand out in almost any situation, so this guy isn't into stealth, he might even consider attacking without warning to be beneath him. A elegant sword speaks more to his chilvaric nature he was likely raised in a noble family and always had the best weapons at his disposal. Rival His dark clothes make it easy to blend into the dark meaning he can attack from stealth, he likely has a very pragmatic attitude though since he isn't a villian its unlikely he's needlessly cruel so he likely tries to end a fight quickly rather than nobely. Perhaps that even shows how he's superior morally to his counterpart, as its easier to end a fight without killing if you get the drop on someone whereas an outright duel will end in death or at least grievous injury. His sword speaks to a hard life, he likely has had to repair it many times (hence the tape on the hilt) and use cheap iron rather that lustrous iron his rival uses.

[@whyattic6014]

Inspector Javert forcing symbolism on characters that don’t have symbolism is literally English class

[@jacobbenns6090]

This gives me flashbacks to 10th grade english...., also, friendly comment section metalworker and blacksmith broski here, swords are steel, at least, any sword worth its salt, and while steel is just Iron + carbon, the difference in the two is drastic, not trying to be that guy, cheers mates!

[@sharkle9]

It would be interesting to see the flaws in each of their methods. Say the hero fights a dual but spares his opponent at end of it. The opponent is left with permanent injuries that prevents them from ever picking a sword up again or being able to find work, leaving them miserable. The rival swiftly kills those he deems necessary but what if that prevents him from hearing the full story, what if he kills someone that was misled or just following instructions. Then they're both called out by the loved ones of their victims and now carry a guilt leaving them questioning their own ways.

[@scottmantooth8785]

and it's not like anyone EVER wears name tags noting who is E-VIL and who is not...and the thought balloons that might appear in graphic novels are not reliable or visible to those for whom the information might prove most useful

[@LendriMujina]

Knowing how to do this is a very good idea if you're a writer, because sometimes there are limits to your capabilities on how characters are able to look and behave (often due to reasons of personal ability, persistent ideas that you just HAVE to do, or, in some mediums, technological limits), so you don't have a choice but to decide their appearance first. Reverse-engineering like this, while not ideal, can help you determine how to make your character distinct in personality and arc if your hand is being forced in some way.

[@Purgious]

Anime intensifies

[@frankcastleisdead7473]

UnbrokenBrony, *Grabs Popcorn*

[@12isaac00]

*shonen intensifies even harder*

[@ancientninjask1233]

Hero and rival: *exist* Shippers: It's free real estate.

[@stevemcgroob4446]

I was originally goring to fight crime tonight. But then this video popped up so I guess that's canceled.

[@LlamaKing9000]

Bruce Wayne What is billionaire philanthropist Bruce Wayne doing fighting crime at night?

[@ionryful]

Bruce Wayne But the Joker is giving terrible comedian advice!

[@saxosipho]

I don't know for certain, Doctor Freud, but I heard rumors that Bruce Wayne is secretly Batman. Crazy, right!?

[@germanvisitor2]

That is not the Joker, it's Adam Sandler the clown prince of crime against comedy.

[@stevemcgroob4446]

@Doctor Freud It has nothing to do with my mother if that's what your insinuating. While Martha may have been tragically taken awa- Martha... OH GOD WHY DID I MENTION THAT NAME!

[@ZaldunUrdina]

Plankton! Krabs! PLANKTON!!! KRABS!!!! Spongebob

[@snowydraws5817]

The only truly good rivals

[@guess6635]

@Hyun Dong Lee Plankton is smarter than Krabs but let's his obsession overwhelmes him to where he does stupid things and for Plankton he wants success and the feeling of superity while for Krabs it's for money, they're both kinda Antagonists just with different vices

[@tantainguyen4290]

NARUTO!!! SASUKE!!!! NARUTO!!!!! SASUKE!!!!!! goku

[@arcaneacolytes8134]

2:23 glasses are used to help people see when their regular eyes cannot see well. Also, while using a pen does require more confidence, it is easy to become arrogant when writing with a pen.

[@exi_dudi2037]

I'm sorry for my sins. I will never use a pen again

[@ccaffie1231]

*sweats in madeout with reflection a couple months after switching to pen*

[@user-mg7wh8zq6v]

Mechanical pen users: * maniacal laughter *

[@Kromiball]

@@user-mg7wh8zq6v breaks if pressured too hard

[@empireyouth5791]

To add a little credence to wearing glasses him actively choosing to wear them could show that he himself understands that he can’t always see the World clearly And May need some outside assistance Also to add a little credence to the pen while one can argue it to make someone more rigid and also cannot be erase and therefore if you see a mistake you cannot undo it I just have to except the fact it’s there, in other words he lives with his mistakes while pencil JB can Peacefully forget about them after erasing them

[@wintersnow998]

JP: The hero uses fire? The rival shall weild ice! The hero is hotheaded- Me: So, wait.... we're designing Natsu and Gray, now?

[@berry186]

More topics: -Emo Hero -Emo Villian -Monologues -Diary that people lay will nilly around -Rebellious Teens -Bad parents (aka Home alone) -People who have been knowing/practicing magic/powers for a long time being defeated by noobs -Clueless protagonists -Stupid excuses for being in a love triangle (although this video somewhat touched on it, but just scratched the surface) -musicals

[@Megafreakx3]

You just decide Sasuke xD

[@louisduarte8763]

"You sly dog! You caught me monologuing!"

[@thecomplicatedlife6968]

Villain Protagonists!

[@thecomplicatedlife6968]

Louis Duarte incredible reference

[@seb24789]

Found footage?

[@gulfcoastgaming6034]

“Having rivals become romantic partners sounds like it could become an interesting relationship dynamic.” Owl House is taking notes.

[@youtubeuniversity3638]

This makes me think a FALSE rivalry could have some great potential. What happens when one is deluded into thinking it's a rivalry and the other is the one who's better?

[@CCLOSPINA]

Basically One-Sided Rivalry, Might Guy and Kakashi

[@Arkdragonman]

Yugioh GX comes to mind for me literally Bastion and Jayden while Jayden doesn’t really care Bastion thinks they are rivals even going so far as to say if jay is the number 1 duelist he’s number 2

[@chiarapaleni4380]

Keith and Lance from voltron!!

[@ChaosRayZero]

Didn't Van von Hunter have a joke about that?

[@beastwarsFTW]

That's Gilgamesh from Final Fantasy 5 in a nutshell.

[@popstarchamp]

Can you do Terrible Writing Advice for Time travel? That concept itself is already so wonky that giving terrible advice about it would be as easy as inserting love triangles and environmentalism into a story.

[@Megafreakx3]

I was hoping for Magic System,

[@popstarchamp]

Megfreakx3 A magic system? That should be easy. Just make sure everyone has an inexplicably infinite amount of (insert magic meter here) and make it a rock paper scissors game. Easy. ;)

[@thefirstprimariscatosicari6870]

PopstarChamp For Time Travel the worst possible thing to do is adding time travel to a story without it to resolve a problem the protagonist encountered. Even Harry Potter fell short when doing it because of how they never used such power again, when with it they could have easily saved everyone multiple times. But atleast J.K. managed to avoid creating a paradox.

[@darkstarofchaos2138]

Well, all the time turners were destroyed (or more accurately, stuck in an endless loop) at the end of the fifth book, so from that point on, time travel was no longer an option. And considering you would change a lot more than just a death by going back in time, especially the further back you go, it was probably for the best that they didn't keep using it. Some powers just aren't meant to be used to solve one's problems.

[@thefirstprimariscatosicari6870]

Dark Star of Chaos But if they are not supposed to be used them do not introduce them. Also even if all of them were put in a time loop someone one day will build new ones and problems would start.

[@rainstorm6707]

I just love the line, “You couldn’t rival a French Fry.”

[@All4Tanuki]

Are they not divine? Few could.

[@justyouraveragehuman9197]

I loved how it gave (basically) what not to do, and what to do all while sticking to the theme of the vid, would love to see inner critic in more vids!

[@jonsnor4313]

Bring him back.

[@asdfghjk1576]

I really appreciated the “inner critic notes”. It‘s really helpful to get a bit more of an explanation on what you should do.

[@aLukepop]

Seconding the part about having a brief written idea of what to do. I love the sarcasm but having a clear piece of advice is nice too, especially when the other qualities of the video keep it from being boring.

[@IceQueen975]

XD "There's homoerotic subtext in there" why do I feel like this is a vauge callout to the yaoi fangirls who ALWAYS pair the protag and rival just because?

[@ChaosRayZero]

He was a bit less "vauge" in _this one-_ ;^) kzbin.info/www/bejne/j6Dbg6VmbMmlgLcm20s

[@Dreigonix]

-ALWAYS- NEVER TEMPT THE SLASHERS.

[@guess6635]

As well as to the Naruto and Sasuke rivalry/ obsessional relationship they have

[@f.i.r.e.5119]

-Klance-

[@oof-rr5nf]

@Brook Heyes yuppp

[@kovlad2647]

The letter z represents sleeping because its the last letter of the alphabet, like sleeping is the last thing you do in the day. Edit: I dont actually know why, it seems to be the best answer though.

[@Redfork2000]

It is used because human snoring often sounds like the pronunciation of the letter. Z looks like (also sounds like) electrical wave, and people send out brain waves when they are sleeping.

[@easiestcc6451]

r/showerthoughts

[@whotookmypuddingcup4131]

What if z and a were switched?? AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[@theaveragecomment1014]

@@whotookmypuddingcup4131 XDDDD

[@whotookmypuddingcup4131]

@@theaveragecomment1014 "I'm gonna go to sleep." "Alright goodnight" *not even half an hour later* "AAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

[@divedweller4295]

Ah! I see what you did. The backgrounds make symbolism too. Well defined and shifting shades/depth/layers vs dull gray and slightly darker gray blobiness.

[@ChaosRayZero]

I saw it as *"stripes vs. blobs,"* but yeah... I noticed it too. X^D

[@ImCookieSparx]

JP’s inner critic: “you can’t just solve every writing problem with a love triangle.” That one terrible live action fairy odd parents movie centered around affections: “Hold my wand.”

[@bloodstoneore4630]

Please tell me this comment is just a figment of my imagination

[@floricel_112]

@@bloodstoneore4630 it's real

[@flawer1316]

@@bloodstoneore4630 Its real. And you cannot escape from reality, you have to bear the consequences of knowing its existence.

[@pablohernandez4571]

That part about the homoerotic subtext is so true, they hardly ever develop the protagonist's relationship with his love interest compared to his rival, it's like why not just make them gay for each other, at least it'd be a lot more interesting and less predictable.

[@sakshikhatavkar3562]

I know right???! I can’t even begin to explain how many times I’ve been frustrated because the rivals had so much damn chemistry than the trophy love interest. UGH.

[@itzel6698]

you get it lol

[@Sharkakaka]

Also, why can't we have a rival/antiheroine that is a girl, like most of those characters are dudes but a girl that while not as physically strong as the hero is either a better strategist and/or quicker than the hero actually would make a series of fairly interesting battles between them and may allow the rival to win against the hero with careful and precise strikes while the hero attempts to deliver powerful blows to throw them off balance and gain an advantage. Also could make this entire relationship that is more developed than the love interest develop without homophobes interfering and make the hero slowly realize this whole "rivalry" has actually led to an love/hate relationship and both have feelings for one another but none wants to admit it.

[@WraithMagus]

The description of the foil (on the sheet of paper in 3:19 ) misses the most crucial element: Foils are placed in similar situations or have similar backgrounds/starting points. This is what makes their contrasts more meaningful, because the few differences they have stand out when they are otherwise so similar. The key phrase is "There but for the grace of God go I" - the recognition that only a few certain choices, key character traits, or even just pure luck or happenstance are the difference between the hero and something much more tragic. In The Dark Knight, the Joker isn't a foil for Batman although he is an antagonist because the Joker is so fundamentally at odds with everything Batman represents. Harvey Dent is his foil, because they are fundamentally pursuing the same goals, and Dent is even portrayed as doing so from a more laudable position as his method is more legal. His fall, his questioning "why him", and Batman's response that it was because he was the "best among them" are meant to highlight the tenuousness of the ethics of such a hero. Meanwhile, ALL the villains in the Sam Raimi Spiderman movies are foils for Spiderman - their manners of gaining superpowers are similar, they are all entering with good intentions, but they all face temptations soon after gaining their powers. Spiderman beats back his temptation because he learns early on that "With great power comes great responsibility", but Green Goblin, Hobgoblin, and Dr. Octopus are all basically his friends and start from the same place before they become villains. The possibility of Harry being put into Slitherine house is done all but explicitly to set up Draco Malfoy as a foil - had Harry gone to Slitherine, Draco is what Harry would have become. Foils don't have to be villains or even just frienemy rivals, either. Benny in The Mummy is a foil for Rick (Brendon Frasier) in the 1999 The Mummy in spite of not quite rising up to villainous status. He has the same background of knowledge of the tomb, and also leads a team back to it, but his motivation is pure greed and cowardice, and he therefore is a lackey to everyone he meets and is ultimately killed by his own greed. Foils aren't just rivals just because, they are like an experiment, where the hero is the control, and the foil is what happens when you change just one or two variables, showing how thin the line is between two wildly different outcomes. To go back to The Mummy, in Mummy 2, when Rick and Imhotep are dangling from a ledge, Evy risks her life to save Rick, while Anuk-Sun-Amun flees to save herself because she doesn't have the same relationship Evy and Rick do... and when Imhotep realizes this, he lets himself plummet to his death. That's something that only has meaning when they are two characters put up as equals - it's only be seeing the contrast in what Anuk-Sun-Amun will do for him that Imhotep starts to realize his inferiority. All of the other versions of Earth in the several times that Stargate dealt with alternate dimensions are entire casts of foils for the cast of characters from the "real Earth" - and the cast is notably frequently hostile to their own alternate selves, even though they were only saved by the sacrifice of other alternate worlds. All of these create foils, where any difference between worlds is literally the only change that differentiates their outcomes. In some worlds, the whole of Earth is conquered because they used a nuclear weapon and Teal'c refuses to defect. In other worlds, the existence of the stargate was revealed, and Earth is under martial law from a unified world dictatorship. In others, they just find some macguffin or another.

[@TheCoCAmbassador]

All i heard was bla bla bla English major stuff! Nobody cares!

[@danaa-]

​​@@TheCoCAmbassadorall i hear is illiteracy. Why bother even commenting?

[@TheCoCAmbassador]

@@danaa- I guess it was a joke because of the channel this video belongs to, But I'm Honestly not sure anymore

[@kelly_seastar]

I lost it at "We will meet again as rivals, but only when you need an easy victory to boost your ego."

[@fandomfrenzy2220]

Actual decent writing or not the fandom is going to make the rivals fall in love by the end of it

[@ConnanTheCivilized]

Only if they actually like the story (even enough to criticize it.) I’ve never seen anyone fantasize about a work they don’t care about.

[@shinkenger2011]

​@@ConnanTheCivilizedYou'd be surprised

[@sameaston9587]

6:55 Inner Critic, the rivals-to-lovers trope has been done and done.

[@saffi_taffi]

When?

[@baguettiregretti1961]

Till the end of time

[@lemonstarofficial]

ok

[@MILOPETIT]

Giving bad advice while creating an example of good rivalry.. Very well done and the glasses were actually a very clever touch

[@JakubWojciechowski933]

Dr. Cactus W I feel very disturbated with thought that anyone found inner critic advices good

[@luciarosier2443]

Jakub Wojciechowski Why?

[@JakubWojciechowski933]

Lucia Rosier Because those are at best mediocre advices. What actually Inner critic said? That Terriblr Writer advices are bad (who expected), that you have to spend some time developing characters personality, and put a lot of effort into their rivarly and motives. Those are advices type "do it right so it will be right". But worst (and I think only one that really matters) thing which Inner Critic said is that rival and character should be qual or similar power level. That's not how it works at all! Character and Rival issue is very complex and various, witch plenty of diffrent forms and options, and you can't simply said that their powers should be equal. In Tolkien book for instance, every single character is way weaker than Sauron and that's why their conflict is interesting. But in Dragon ball, entire deal with rival is that they are equal and that's why they are interesting to see Goku and Vegeta fighting each other. Actually, watching rival, who is severly weaker than character but still trying to beat him is great idea which could be great is done right. Actually, the REAL reason why most of the character-rival quest are so interesting is because we can watch our character rising in power and changing durimg every duel with rival, which is also developing by fights. That issue is really deep and complex so putting that in simple "don't make one weaker" is extremly harmfull, plain and just boring. Like nearly everything what inner critic said.

[@MILOPETIT]

Jakub Wojciechowski The rivalry between those two critics was fun to watch tho. They played off each other thematically and even though inner critic's advice boiled down to "don't do stupid things" and the format doesn't allow their relationship to evolve much, their rivalry is pretty well done. For example, since they argue instead of fighting, the outcome of every argument they have is debatable as to who "wins". Even the ending follows that logic since inner critic loses, but because the other one cheated. Well of course it may not be that clever but it makes me think :)

[@luciarosier2443]

Jakub Wojciechowski I think a good example of a rivalry where both rivals are true equals is the one between Light and L from Death Note. A rivalry like that makes you really wonder who's going to come out on top, and makes more sense--why should the stronger rival care about some random weakling among many? This power imbalance leads to one-sided fake rivalries like Goku VS Vegeta. For a rivalry to be good both characters should be invested in it, but there has to be a reason for it.

[@jiduerot]

Critic writer and fanfic writer also have opposite backgrounds: critic writer has straight lines, which means order and planning; and fanfic writer has splatters of different sizes, which means spontaneous and chaos

[@aldor9357]

But what if rivals create their own Love Triangle?

[@stewartb1019]

That would be a very cunning move on the part of the rivals. After all, how can the Hero Love Triangle overwhelm the climax if the Rival Love Triangle is doing the same thing? Or would they merge into a single all powerful Love Web, absorbing all characters and conveniently but unsatisfactorily tying up all the "minor" conflicts?

[@hanyuukawaiinanodesu]

ah, shounen anime is actually doing Rival Trios now, so you get A: the main character B: the pretty boy with the most tragic backstory C: the violent unhinged one voice by Nobuhiko Okamoto

[@lavendermarshmallowplant3229]

hanyuukawaiinanodesu, I love Mha 😂 nice reference

[@hanyuukawaiinanodesu]

also applies to shokugeki no soma almost to aru majutsu as well but there isn't a main pretty boy rival involved in that i think...

[@Himarsaka]

hanyuukawaiinanodesu Nah, Touma doesn't really have a main rival or a rival at all (unless you count later down in the novels but the rivalry was short lived.) Nakamoto is there as Accelerator but Accel is more of his own person than Touma's rival.

[@toadlord8594]

Aka My hero academia. With pretty angst boy w Daddy issues Todoroki, edgy angry Bakugou and cinnamon roll Midoriya Lol. Only Bakugou voiced by someone else.

[@toadlord8594]

@Varga Julian The original what exactly? Original Bakugou, The one with Daddy issues, Main character or all of the above?

[@crabapple7704]

5:56 you can tell he’s holding back laughter and I love it

[@marcopohl4875]

wait a second: they're supposed to be connected by a love triangle? but my rival-character's love interest is the main character's sister... i think i'm gonna barf!

[@voivodadracula1936]

Easy, they're not blood siblings

[@jacobbenns6090]

Whistles some good ol John Denver...

[@Rainbowthewindsage]

Well, it doesn't have to be entirely romantic love to be considered a love traingle. The main point is that they are fighting over a character.

[@owenmonjesmugas3637]

Make the sister try to get the rival,but, the protagonist figths for the rival,and try to make the rival doesn't notice, thanks to a cómic relief character, that the sister wants him.

[@davidgumazon]

Plot twist: main character is siscon

[@XrosM]

You know, this video reminded me what a great rival Zuko is from Avatar.

[@CCLOSPINA]

They were enemies, not rivals.

[@osmosiswright9924]

If anything Zuko and Azula were rivals, since they had the same goal for most of the series.

[@tiagodarkpeasant]

zuko had a reason to be obsessed with aang at least, and didnt hate him, specially because his uncle understand the reason for the avatar existing

[@Who-vd3iv]

Zuko is the exemple of how to do an enemy to the protagonist (Aang) and an antagonist to another character (Azula). Talking about it, all the bad exemples of the video reminded me *a lot* of Naruto and Sasuke.

[@fightingmedialounge519]

Really, more than half of these don't really apply to naruto and sasuke.

[@hoop6988]

I want him to make a series called ‘Amazing writing advice’ and give genuine advice.

[@DetectiveWraith]

If you look in the description, he has a website where he gives actually good writing advice

[@hoop6988]

@@DetectiveWraith 👍

[@chloeela5804]

You should do How to write Mean/ Popular kids!!

[@kingbubbles9461]

What about the hero being weak compared to the rival and not the other way around? Maybe have the rival be symbolic of all of the hero’s flaws and only by discovering said flaws and overcoming them will the hero finally be able to overcome their rival and finally claim victory.

[@liamf2300]

Mr. Bubbles yeah pretty much the joker from the dark knight

[@somethingrandom5503]

Hal vs. Hotspur covered this, and it might be the best part of King Henry IV, Part 1.

[@swishfish8858]

Does Darth Vader count as Luke's rival? I mean, the ultimate villain is Palpatine after all. And Vader has the perfect opposites motif going. So if he counts, then he fits your bill.

[@leeworley6727]

Griffith is stronger than guts in berserk except no one is a hero. Best rival story to ever exist ever

[@francisthompson3772]

The funny thing is, that's exacly what he did for his book Aeion Legion.

[@JarroHood]

"geez, and you haven't sold any books". That was a clever joke about a guy talking to himself

[@DarthBiomech]

Honestly, yours are the only sponsored segments that I don't skip over. They're awesome.

[@afishwithagun2190]

Inner critic is “that guy” who uses big words to sound smart

[@oceanman_8370]

But he is making good points. It's just hard to look past the try hard nature of his voice and grammar

[@LebronJames-kl8jn]

Oceanman _ yeah no shit he’s joking

[@colingznetwork781]

Blab Fish so, that blonde kid with glasses in my class that is self centered and smart, except more self centered

[@RobinParravel]

I hate people that use big words to sound photosynthesis.

[@colingznetwork781]

@@violetrain4638 me too a little bit

[@Ultimaton100]

“Neither the hero nor the rival should have any chemistry with the love interest, though, that takes effort to write.” Ouch, you torched Kishimoto with that sentence.

[@salamatusuleiman2393]

God, the fact that I connect that part to some shows including Naruto and also don't develop the love interest into a person,she just there to serve as conflict and motivation

[@nanoblast5748]

Homoromantic relationship? Isn't that for the fanfic?

[@kimifw58]

No. The story uses heavy homoromantic subtext, and then the fanfic makes the romance explicit.

[@oof-rr5nf]

@@kimifw58 Amen.

[@kaexewires7531]

uh... I can explain... I SHIP MY CHARACTER'S SIDEKICK WITH HIM...

[@julien4305]

wait i thought he said *homoerotic*

[@sadnessofwildgoats]

@@julien4305 same had to put on subtitles just to clear it up

[@christater5540]

Inner Crotoc sounds like Lysanderoth. Yes it was I, my machinations lay undetected for years for I am a master of deception!

[@shirt9862]

So you’re a prozd fan

[@vyrothevirus5304]

Did somebody say EGGCELENT?

[@glazeliights7025]

You know you watched too many of JPs videos when you can tell the exact moment he adds the love triangle.

[@CompletelyNewguy]

the intro just keeps getting more and more cluttered.

[@slateoffate9812]

CompletelyNewguy Is that the point?

[@nocktukdaze8256]

CompletelyNewguy "It's so dense, every single image has so many things going on"

[@MugenMook]

Nocktuk Daze "It's like poetry, It rhymes"