Royal Variety V: The Greatest Show Ever Staged

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[@tariamani]

Those Aladdin lyrics weren’t changed for the live action remake - they were changed before the ORIGINAL cartoon came out because even back then Disney were worried about getting a fatwa (although in the original original version it was ‘cut off your nose’ not ‘ear’) This is SUCH a deep cut - how on earth did they get hold of it back then in pre-internet days? Disney must have printed and published enough sheet music with the unchanged original lyrics for it to have ended up on license to the Royal Variety in error, so this number is a pretty special Disneyana oddity.

[@StuartMillard]

Fantastic context, cheers.

[@80srevival]

They didn’t change the lyrics until the video was released, the original theatrical release and CD soundtrack contained the original lyrics, this was most likely filmed during the time between Aladdin’s theatrical release and VHS release

[@fattomandeibu]

@@80srevival In that case, it could well have been to secure a lower age rating, since at least here in the UK, ratings were harsher for VHS releases than they were for the cinema.

[@macdoherty]

I come for the insight into British culture, I stay for Stu's psychosexual preoccupation with Syd Little. I saw Scofield do Joseph when I was a kid. "Close Every Door" would probably be more appropriate for his current situation.

[@eatmywords]

I hope Joseph was a consenting adult 😉

[@flemishdog]

glad Rolf was there to help prevent cruelty to children.

[@therespectedlex9794]

What about the welfare of adults? A man should be able to take a shower in peace.

[@kildogery]

You sounded absolutely gutted that woman in the box didn't die.

[@Mellbergfan]

I've only come across this channel in recent weeks and have been bingeing the videos since. As a kid I remembered seeing a show that had a blonde chap saying "stick it up your jumper" and I've thought of it from time to time in the years since, after coming across this channel I suspected I might eventually find the answers I've been searching 30+ years for. And I finally have, this was the show, Billy Pearce was the man, thank you Stuart!

[@neilware8835]

Been waiting for another hit of childhood tv trauma...Great job Mr Millard!

[@tombstoneharrystudios584]

Fantastic as usual, Mr Millard! Billy Pierce, no disrespect meant, seems an odd choice for lead. I only remember him from the oh-so-edgy in the 80s catchphrase “Chuffin’” which seems an obvious steal from Jimmy Jones ‘kinell!’ The Royal Variety shows always seemed to be at least a decade behind the times, and with flash-in-the-pan pop stars as special guests, even more so What baffles me is how, with such a huge budget, everything always resembles an end of the pier Panto, with tired jokes, third tier comic as lead, and stage show brats shoehorned in as a way of getting bums on seats 😂 @22:02 Shahid Malik! Always enjoyed that trick as a boy…the fact it WAS the box your microwave came in was more fooling than Daniels’ gaudy affairs Though he did seem to get faster and faster with it, leading to, as Stuart observed, it all being a bit redundant 😮

[@markdavidson9100]

Mark Heaps baddie speaks like the character he played in a crimewatch reconstruction, nice that here he’s although a villain, ott and harmless

[@Garbageman28]

His took a day job delivering potatoes.

[@therespectedlex9794]

​@@Garbageman28Did he shout at women, with harassment like? Then gave them a spud or two.

[@gezbanks1277]

Only discovered this channel , keep up the great work stuart👍👍

[@Johnnyafc]

Watched your videos over and over , absolute brilliance

[@FlowersInHisHair]

I'm actually a bit impressed. The choreography, sets and costumes for this show were pretty darn good. The "scary" animal costumes are actually fantastic

[@count69]

Produced by Andy Peters. So it's all stage school and musicals instead of end of the pier and musicl hall

[@sonnyjimbod]

I feel like my whole life was just one slow moment leading up to this video. Now I've watched it I can be free

[@therookerybookery]

When I was a kid I was convinced that Billy Pierce was related to The Chuckle Brothers, like he was a Chuckle Cousin or somot?

[@lukeb247]

I remember loving this one as a kid. I think I vaguely remember the daleks showed up briefly in the next year's one

[@B3tanTyronne]

Sadly not many participants in this for the nonce drinking game, however when Harris shows up remember you can take spirits by the pint.

[@eatmywords]

philip schofield belting it out at the children's variety performance now sounds like a criminal act.

[@johnwelch5132]

‘I close my eeeys….’

[@robet007]

Peel back my f...

[@newsbender]

It was back then as well

[@Robslondon]

A real treat as always Stuart…. Hideous as it may be!

[@COL321]

That Thunderbird was fantastic, I hope it went to a theme park somewhere. Also, yes what the hell was that flap on the top of Blobby? An air vent? A voice hole? Did they pull the actor out of there after the show like a baby being born? Great video, anyway, really enjoyed it.

[@theflyintheointment]

Paul Miller is like Pipes in Ghostwatch on this channel. Millerwatch. Only obviously more terrifying and demonic.

[@ChrisHopkinsBass]

“Any chance of a line your highness?”

[@johnwelch5132]

Land of a Thousand Dances. This is horrifying

[@tactictoe]

This feels as though Disney were directly involved, this was almost unsettling in how professional it was for this kind of affair.

[@kieranmajury9623]

I went to see Scof as Joseph as a kid in Dublin. Madness

[@schtum1]

Well this was a treat

[@paulmurphy5614]

Another great video - have you had a look at the weird 70s/80s TV phenomenon of Summertime specials, where the BBC and then ITV tried to give rain drenched British Summer viewers the hope of it being great somewhere else in the UK, by throwing a crappy end of pier type variety show, hosted by your favourites like Michael Barrymore and Bobby Davro? There’s an entire clip of one here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/nqTLnWtjhZuEqtk

[@StuartMillard]

I recently got hold of the entire run of Summertime/Seaside Special, and plan to really dig into it on here next year.

[@Lukozer]

Billy Pearce... The man who makes everyone in Copycats look multi-talented

[@eveglead1913]

As soon as I heard the name Ap my heart sank...

[@jointgib]

i found this content enjoyable

[@seancomrie4714]

I'm waiting for Dean Gaffney, Mike and Angelo and Paul Jennings to show up in some way or another.

[@gyorkshire257]

Cracked up like Saint when the band made up as what I really hope were supposed to be monkeys came on. Legendary stuff.

[@makeawishcounttothreescrat2346]

With your videos I came for the childhood nostalgia and have stuck around for the insertion of at least one random wrestling nod in each. This show is random enough for a New Jack appearance. Someone please book him taking out the Grumbleweeds. For bonus points which Weezer song references said dearly departed mentalist?

[@mairsh]

I asked him to go to the Green Day concert, but he said he'd never heard of them.

[@makeawishcounttothreescrat2346]

@@mairsh How cool is that?

[@getmetothegeek4066]

Love it, Stuart!

[@19Gardens]

Rolf Harris is probably watching New Jack and Savile getting it on right now

[@stuartmay6225]

At 0:46, behind Andi Peters' left shoulder, is that an early Kathy Burke playing Perry or is it a care in the community Harry Potter who looks like he's fallen on hard times and started shoplifting?

[@ChrisHopkinsBass]

Oh dear…..Schofield!

[@nutty784]

And Harris.

[@rogerrambo4172]

Millard................MILLARD! Please do In A Fix With The Sontarons, The 6th Dr/Jim'll Fix It crossover that definitely IS canon

[@IamRobotMonkey]

Christ. That's all I can manage.

[@danbit]

Joyous review!

[@kate_cooper]

Indiana Jones saying he’s “on holiday” when everybody knows Americans say “on vacation” annoys me more than it probably should.

[@newsbender]

That and the voice sounding nothing like Ford, not even attempting to do so

[@jazzygeofferz]

Cracking video.

[@johnwelch5132]

Bill does look a bit like James Whale in this one.

[@stephenhough4957]

Peters? I thought this was in aid of cruelty? It’s Peters! That’s cruel. No one needs to see that. An 80’s Pearce & its not Stuart? What’s that about? He uses that bizarre phrase ‘bite to eat’ and that makes me disdain him even more.

[@elizabethcanavan3755]

Thanks for showing this type of shite,Consider myself very lucky to have missed it 1st time round

[@leejones8582]

Your a Saint for watching this

[@gamesmasteruploader4863]

"makes you want to put New Jack through a table" hahaahha

[@richgsimisker6286]

I think you'll find that Blobbies get... Lemon-omas. Arf.

[@markdavidson9100]

Not sure if mentioned previously, but Dad from Beadle video, played Dipso Pete in episode of Minder

[@Ceej_MM]

24:23 veddy good, little brother. Proper horrorshow.

[@multirevelator]

good observation!, designer must of been a fan of the film its too uncanny

[@smacksalad]

Bongo: The Movie. Yes, all the yes's.

[@newsbender]

I thought these awful shows were merely an 80s/90s anachronism but, incredibly, they are still putting them on every year. And they've been running since 1910! Last one was 2023... what the hell...

[@swayze_mane]

these are why the princess died before her older sister did

[@lordhoot1]

Mark Heap?! Mr Lizard himself?

[@DelosFive]

Cmon now. If you enjoy this content, buy the guy a coffee. Keep it up, Stuart! Always excellent stuff 👌🏼😉

[@StuartMillard]

Thanks so much!

[@retrorambles517]

Bravo

[@TheNightBadger]

This was fucking amazing. Maybe not so much Take That at the end...

[@carn9507]

Like a couple other people have stated, I have no real recollection of this Billy Pearce person but he must have been popular enough to be the lead in this show. Weird.

[@greg0uk]

Was this about 14 hours long?

[@baronswagger]

17:22 and it was going so well! 😢

[@mattpendell1369]

Ron Lucas and Scorch were on my telly all the time. Why though?

[@multirevelator]

yeh!, i think because Ron was rather handsome and of course American. Scorch was a very high end puppet and sort of 'street' and edgy for mid nineties British tv. I used to record the Ron Lucas show and watch it over and over!

[@dinogoldie9716]

I'm not claiming Billy Pearce molested me so badly that I not only repressed all knowledge of the incident but also wiped knowledge of his very existence from my memory. However, I have absolutely no memory of a 80s/90s Light ents chap called "Billy Pearce." Nothing. Jimmy Cricket? Sure. Little & Large? Of course. Rolf Ewetree? yup. But not Billy Pearce. Weird.

[@katewolfspirit6722]

I don't remember him either, except his face looks sort of vaguely familiar. No idea what he has appeared in.

[@mermaidman1985]

Isn't one of those rifleman Benedict Cumberbatch? he would have been about 20 at the time ;)

[@strongcoffee7]

I enjoyed the Group 4 joke

[@klisher]

17:33 🤣🤣brilliant

[@mikeycribs81]

I didn't get the new jack reference

[@FranzSanchez-ky9up]

Believe it or not, this isn't the most embarrassing thing Mark Heap has done... Have you seen his cameo in Octopussy?

[@peterlarkin762]

Another Indiana Jones themed one! Wtf, did they have a contract with Disney or something?

[@carn9507]

Disney didn't own Indiana Jones back then. That happened in 2012 when Disney bought Lucasfilm and started a seemingly never ending stream of Star Wars stuffs.

[@mrECisME]

Old British TV is a like a who's who of child molestors.

[@davidbrokend]

Pip scoph was always a wrong one

[@womblediehard123]

My 32 inch Sony TV broke while this was showing on my TV. I fisted the screen real hard because the show was as boring as you could get! Plus it shitted all over Indiana Jones before Kathleen Kennedy did!

[@adrinathegreat3095]

Wow, cheaply hashed together kids panto, with a huge budget, I'd imagine their agents said, easy money here, it's just a collection of faces nobody will be interested in the script

[@cosmicwartoad2587]

There's something very, suspicious about those historical sex abuse allegations and the amount of time it takes for the 'victims' to come forward.

[@carn9507]

Seriously? It took me a decade before I could talk to someone about my own experience. For first few years I blamed myself for it even happening, and thought no one would ever believe me. The amount of time is different for every survivor, due to a huge variety of reasons and situations and the available support accessible to the survivor. False allegations do happen (MJ, Bob Dylan, Cliff Richard just to name a few) and they can do immense damage and harm to their target but I get tired when I hear people say "why didn't they say something at the time?" about an allegation as if that straight away means it's some scam. It really doesn't matter how long it can take for an abuse survivor to find the strength to speak out about their abuser, every allegation needs to be heard and investigated. Unfortunately the false ones make the process so much harder and more painful for the genuine survivors.

[@cosmicwartoad2587]

@@carn9507 What you said about the false ones was what I meant.

[@carn9507]

@@cosmicwartoad2587 Oh cool. Ok. Sorry ( i overreacted. it's a touchy subject for obvious reasons). Have a good day. :)