RQGG20 Stretch Goals - Mike and Alasdair read as Tim Stoker and Peter Lukas!

Continuing our fundraising goals for RQGG20, donors submitted suggestions for Mike LeBeau and Alasdair Stuart to read as their characters Tim Stoker and Peter Lukas!
For more information or to hang out with the Rusty Quill community, visit:
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#Magnus
The Magnus Archives sure are a place to be. Rusty Quill really has that Horror Fiction Podcast down huh? Character work like this takes practice, and luckily we had lonely eyes for the job! Teaholding beware, we're Gaming and Giving. TMA S1 S2 S3 S4 and S5 sure are a ride.

[@deesparrow6354]

Tim's lines: dark, sad, dramatic Peter's lines: boats! :)

[@amandapedroso4728]

EXACTLY

[@TobascoToast]

So real

[@carterdavis3556]

"Everyone has trauma, Jon. It came free with your fucking office job."

[@corvidkhaos]

The divorce counter has me on the floor

[@user-cq8rf6iz9m]

Take a shot every time they mention divorce

[@captainsunshine3d]

i appreciate that alasdair’s normal voice is the exact same as his peter lukas voice

[@Ray-hk1zm]

,,,Whoever sent in the "when someone leaves your life" monologue,,,, I just wanna talk-

[@Ray-hk1zm]

HEY WHOEVER SENT IN THE MONOLOGUE POST-SASHA'S DEATH I JUST WANNA *TALK-*

[@isabelchmontuenga]

Then why the fuck are you holding a pipe?

[@tirwd]

​@@Ray-hk1zm I'm in pain

[@juliehaas1425]

Cried at sashas

[@B.E.N_]

I JUST WANNA TALK IGNORE THE PIPE

[@emilygrigg1496]

4:43 “When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, clumsy.” 13:25 "Statement of Timothy Stoker, regarding his absolute dumptruck of an ass... Statement Begins" ok i submitted both of these and its absolutely wild how different they are i'm CRYIN

[@sarahgent2674]

Fantastic idea but also how dare you

[@atchley4775]

Y O U!!!!!!

[@fruitygarlic3601]

*slaps own ass* This bad boy can fit so much inside. Statement ends.

[@septimusbeep]

The TAZ quit made me so sad

[@tea_n_ink]

hello person of good standards , oh taz listener

[@chemicalstairs]

9:52 The instant fear and excitement of hearing your username with no memory of what you submitted

[@stellag3000]

Drunk Season 1 Tim karaoke singing brought me back from the hole of reality that was created by the fact that there are two episodes left of TMA

[@brighidcampbell491]

Honestly it made me so much happier than I was expecting to imagine Tim going to karaoke with Sasha and just genuinely having a good time.

[@tuesdaynext7370]

I'm indifferent to lonelyeyes as a ship, but I absolutely love the divorce jokes.

[@certifiedghost]

THE DIVORCE COUNTER IM SCREAMING-

[@almudenada]

I'm so used to having the prologue of Good Omens read humourously that I had forgotten how ominous it is. Very nice Mike.

[@sophiephilips-roberts3311]

Same, i was like "oh yeah, i guess that *is* pretty dire."

[@BNK2442]

This reminds me, did you know that Neil Gaiman supported heforshe? I know, Gaiman can be such an asshole. Gaiman should be forced to donate to CAFE as a way to say sorry.

[@BNK2442]

Talking about writers having dumb politics.

[@MB-ev9ix]

@BNK2442 Talking about something that literally has no place in this discussion, more like...

[@beholdingsarchivist]

NOT THE "WHEN SOMEONE LEAVES YOUR LIFE" GRIFFIN MCELROY QUOTE NO IM SOBBING

[@chaiky6556]

I AIN'T DOING OKAY

[@HokoriChanXD]

Lonely Eyes?? Who's she? Only Teaholding now!!

[@thevampirelover]

Never has the god-bit from good omens been read with that much existential dread. Well done, Mike.

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

it was very lovely

[@peasandquiet7750]

The Terry Pratchett quote made me way too emotional especially considering that this was released on his date of death

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

TNU Terry Pratchett

[@txjenjoyer]

4:43 how could you do this to me im gonna sob

[@Liz-lq8hw]

The Lonelyfans thing made me nearly die of laughter and second hand embarrassment

[@parker-jy7tk]

14:57 - Sasha Statement for anyone that needs the timestamp 😌

[@lj3353]

My timsasha heart is breaking :(

[@lordoftheducks332]

I didn’t watch the whole video and clicked expecting something really funny. I’m in pain.

[@maicey_t.]

What the actual hell, I'm so sad now

[@ceaseless_spiral_avatar]

IM SOBBING AFTER LISTENING TO THAT I LOVE TIMMM MY POOR BOY 😭

[@thetasteofsunshine]

_where's the body, timothy_

[@ominous-lm1cq]

Alasdair’s dancing during drunk tim sing a long is everything I need in my life

[@ash-kq2kp]

"somewhere over the rainbow, I am bi" ISHJDGHGF had a good chuckle over that

[@beansprout9261]

when mike said his next quote was griffin mcelroy, I was fully prepared for any number of gems. perhaps an i think dogs should vote, or maybe an abstinence til i die i was not expecting the absolute tonal whiplash of the all exits are not made equal speech just sucker punch me in the face next time guys, it’s quicker

[@Genny_Traveler]

Fair warning, don't sip hot chocolate while Alasdair sings "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" 13:44

[@Meleytan7295]

When mike was pausing dramatically in the inigo montoya bit i was so scared it was gonna be "my immortal"

[@SaaKaja]

It's so cute how Mike calls Alasdair "Allie" though

[@ohokay4663]

Looks like I have to do gods work once more GET YER TIMESTAMPS, took me 2 hours to write down 1:48 old man mike 2:45 Peter learns what clowncore is 3:17 if I eated soup then I didnt because I did. No I didnt ♡ 3:31 obligatory 4 rats in a trench coat 3:44 hey there demons, 4:01 divorce counter: 1 4:19 tim swings both ways 4:25 peter would prefer not to 4:40 RIP Danny ♡ 5:08 Peter writes a self help book 5:15 tim... baby... are you ok 5:53 Martin Lukas-Bouchard 6:02 Alex does a little crime. Good for him 6:08 tim is very gender ♡ 6:17 eat the rich 6:25 great! I'm gonna pass out now. 6:30 he loves his boat ♡ 6:37 BAOT, 6:44 TEAHOLDING 6:56 The Hat! 7:23 This is a normal time stamp that does not want to hurt you ♡ 7:41 chaos 7:47 Peter's actual will 8:28 Gins out, Sins out 8:32 Drunk Karaoke season 1 tim 9:07 Peter's a birthday boy! 9:21 Inigo Montoya 9:36 Pouty lmao 9:54 Tim says murder is ok so it must be true ♡ 10:01 Old Spice by the Lonely 10:21 Uno (not a request but I like it) 10:27 Trauma 10:33 Peter throws a tantrum like a man baby 10:48 hahaha I'm traumatized 10:56 chicken fight 11:12 tim being bi 11:25 divorce counter: 3 11:45 o h , 11:55 uwu lonely boi 12:06 he do be vibin tho... 12:14 confirmed big boy man 12:20 PROMISE? (3:31, 11:45, 23:57) 12:28 hey ducks 12:40 Elliotly lyric 12:46 tim voice the birds work for the bourgeoisie 13:02 TIM DATE START 13:14 divorce counter: 3.5 (I count it) 13:20 thiccque cake 13:54 am I having a stroke 14:21 does he dance dance dance? 14:29 gertrude is a force to be reckoned with 15:29 STOOOOOP 16:36 Dad Behavior Peter 16:59 Wheres my super suit? 17:09 Trans Rights is stopping the unknowing ♡ 17:15 GOD I WISH, 17:33 Elliotly lyric 2 17:57 18:18 (haha Magnus number) Tim affirmations 18:30 Terrifying. Thank you, Peter. 18:14 Elias is just a h8r 18:53 divorce counter: 4 19:02 I think Mike failed spanish (not a request) 19:10 be gay do crimes 19:28 SOON MAY THE WELLERMAN COME TO BRING US SUGAR AND TEA AND R 19:40 awe... ah, OH- 19:47 divorce counter: 5 20:07 I need fanart of this. 20:23 What a fucking drama king 20:32 be gay do crime 2 20:41 This is exactly how food is in America, trust me I'm an American 20:53 #bigpeterrights and while we're at it #tonkatruckassmartinrights 21:06 Delta Archive 21:13 Martin, come pick me up 21:22 Camp tim is the wokest take in the fandom and I love it 21:42 Leave Me Alone 21:52 thiccque cake 2 22:01 thiccque cake (season) 3 22:18 BUTT SHART 22:49 thank you, tim, king shit 23:07 Peter Poetry Hours 23:36 TIM VOICE ALL OF THE BIRDS DIED IN 1986 DUE TO REAGAN KILLING THEM AND R 23:45 FUCK The Guardian all my homies HATE The Guardian 23:57 Its ok guys he's alright! 24:17 No Pronouns Peter 24:36 nya uwu 24:55 Improv re: The Guardian 25:24 uwu 2 25:34 SECRET TUNNEL 25:51 Tim can't cook 26:03 This is just correct 26:14 Soup is a drink 26:34 That is a compliment, Martin 26:47 Bi the pain away :') 26:55 Good Cows ! 27:03 Road Work Ahead? 27:08 Quarantine still going on after a whole year: 27:21 Dance off 27:41 divorce counter: 6 28:02 What, you beholding? bitch? 28:30 Timposter 28:59 Bad News Bear 29:11 Don't Do It 29:30 PROMISE? 2 29:41 MY MANGO 29:52 *Give him your kneecaps* [Dual section] 30:00 SARGNARG THE HARDGE HARG 31:39 Boss and Double Boss 32:01 A lovely bunch of coconuts 32:23 Going antiquing 32:32 Tim can't sleep 33:21 Knock Knock 33:33 Tim is trying, okay? 33:48 There is an ARCHIVIST, LOOSE in the ARCHIVES 34:06 Sorry did he say Dad 34:23 jamming out 34:33 Where's the Body, Timothy? 34:50 nice 34:57 When is Tim ever on his best behavior? 35:15 That tracks 35:34 Dad Behavior 2 35:54 Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 36:07 Tim the marriage counselor 36:22 Tim on the tundra 36:47 As per usual. 36:54 WTF... GAY LITTLE MARTIN 37:47 LonelyFans prelude 39:28 LonelyFans start

[@lilaboxx]

You my friend deserve an award and a cookie 🍪

[@alisonlazarus5989]

IT WAS NOT A NORMAL TIMESTAMP AND IT DID HURT ME

[@boobean1444]

THANK YOU

[@ohno8398]

You are a hero

[@Ra_the_Sun_god]

You are amazing

[@schrodingersmichael2754]

That Sasha statement had me in actual tears.

[@epicfuzzybear1]

this is literally the highlight of my year I miss my boy Timothy Stoker so much

[@feathersoffancy8988]

Not them quoting TAZ... this is a good day

[@sarahgent2674]

I read this comment before the video and expected like. "Abraca-fuck-you". My shocked tears are not your fault

[@whalesharko4465]

@@sarahgent2674 now I'm scared Oh for fucks sake, whoever sent that in is a monster

[@_telling_tales_]

I'm laughing and crying at the same time why is this such a rollercoaster

[@amphitritemists4595]

Keeping a list of my favorites: 5:15 Someone submitted a good omens quote! My hero! 6:42 That's actually a good ship name why aren't more people using this 9:20 And a princess bride quote you guys are the best 9:59 This is great and I hate you all 10:27 That's it. That's the Magnus Archives 11:45 I'll take it :') 14:29 Gertrude Robinson for the win 15:28 Click here for tears 28:27 Tim having Martin's back

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

thanks fam

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

this should be indeed helpful

[@adrienne-ukulelecraftsandm559]

15:28 I didn’t expect to have my heart absolutely ripped from my chest . I’m just gonna go *scream*

[@fckleitner]

12:30 OH HIT IT'S ME! (and it's a quote from elliotly's fantastic peter lukas wiki song!)

[@PainCausingSamurai]

"One: All Cops are Bastards! Two: I am gay! That is what most of the Daisy comments say!"

[@tuesdaynext7370]

"Keep thotting it up in heaven, king/Enjoy your kayaking trip"

[@notfamedtvpersonalitydrphil]

Absolutely love ur username

[@nerysstuart4210]

I hear alisdair's voice and it triggers my fight or flight response

[@chaiky6556]

The Adventures of Tim and Peter: A Sitcom! podcast when?

[@calamity2383]

divorce jokes: 4:01 7:47 11:25 13:14 18:53 19:47 27:41

[@cw5527]

some favorite tim timestamps for my personal convinience: 3:44 hey there demons 4:19 tim swings both ways 4:40 when someone leaves your life monologue 5:15 good omens intro 7:41 be the chaos you want to see in the world 8:32 drunk tim singing dont stop me now 9:20 you killed my brother 10:26 everyone has trama, JON 10:47 level four friend to unlock the tragic backstory 11:45 jon, i forgive you 12:05 he do just be vibing tho 15:28 oh god oh shit oh fuck ow ow ow ow ow (regarding sasha) 17:36 scared of geese poor boy 18:17 its gonna be ok 18:41 fashion icon 19:39 *ghost tim au ghost tim au ghost tim au-* 21:05 because we're the magnus institue and LIFE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE 21:22 theater kid tim 22:49 face god and walk backwards into hell 23:55 hope he's enjoying his holiday king 26:14 tim's wisdom concerning soup 27:01 road work ahead 28:00 in which tim consults a thesaurus and insults jon, just another day at the office 28:30 tim playing among us 29:10 don't work at the magnus insitute 29:30 hes fine hes fine hes FINEEE 33:48 theres an archivist loose in the archives 34:16 he has a paddle 35:03 i promise,,,,ed other people i'd be on my WORST behavior

[@lilaboxx]

I lost it at "there's is an activist LOOSE in the archives"

[@JemszZz]

5:15 THAT'S THE BEGGING OF GOOD OMENS!! :)

[@Readers937]

9:21 tell me why i was expecting “and your watching disney channel”

[@secondbreakfastpip540]

So much happy stims, so so much hand flapping

[@Ella-gj7vr]

I need to animate this

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

plz do

[@meisterdermatschpfutze4597]

I desperately need this in my live

[@adrienkaplan3902]

Me: yeah I sent in something but it probably got cut *ends up being the first line in the stream*

[@azasazandorable8577]

Wonderful. Didn't notice the FOURTY-FOUR MINUTES fly by. Thanks you both for the energy and seriousness put into every single one of these (the acting, oh my gosh!!) + the video editor for the amazing and hilarious editing once more (the fog effects... the seagull sounds... the divorce counter... the dramatic zooms...).

[@azasazandorable8577]

10:00 Mike losing it offscreen at the Old Spice commercial...

[@sophienoakes2852]

LonelyDads!!

[@gilib1rd]

THE TAZ QUOTE GAVE MY WHIPLASH HOLY SHIT

[@lousutcliffe6713]

This is a cognitive hazard and I like it very much.

[@lousutcliffe6713]

I do still want to hear the Tale of the Merspiders.

[@Hannah-zd5je]

20:30 strong Peter Nureyev energy

[@charlieraine6853]

You are 100% right and you should say it!!!!

[@CucumberKale]

BIG PETER RIGHTS

[@udryx]

Woooow!!! I never thought you'd actually choose mine so when I got to 30:00 I just about died, both from joy and full on roflcopter laughter because you absolutely killed it and I'm now a laughter ghost. Thanks Mike and Alasdair!! Love you both!

[@kierstenburtz8442]

Not me damn near sobbing hearing Tim say "Jon I forgive you and this isn't your fault"

[@newspaper_stand]

Let me tell you when I heard the words "when someone leaves your life" my stomach f/cling dropped instantaneously

[@andreykabakremix]

Time stamp for Tim being an impostor: 28:30

[@SI-nx3fo]

Omg that LonelyFans script is a thing of *beauty*!!! So glad it got included!!!

[@wendyreynolds7982]

On behalf of the people whose ideas I wrote down, thank you! (I expired on the spot when I realised they'd actually done it. I'm typing to you right now from the afterlife.)

[@minty7945]

21:12 "Gertrude's still in the Tundra and I'm scared"

[@a.z.fellco.1704]

12:33 THEY CONFIRMED THIS IS ALL CANON

[@chamilleramirez4894]

L.A. DIE-A-BLE IM SOBBING my small small Mexican heart has broken at this I can no longer go on 😔

[@chemicalstairs]

36:53 YOU THOUGHT I WOULDNT NOTICE A SEASON 1 TEEN WOLF REFERENCE OMG PURE GENIUS I LOVE YOU

[@isabelchmontuenga]

Thats why it sounded familiar! You dont understand how much of me racking my brain to remember have saved me

[@PainCausingSamurai]

I made a request, but I didn't provide anything specific to say. I just wanted Mike to improvise Tim's hypothetical last words to Not Sasha before Jon killed her.

[@SeraEllis]

thank you mike, thank you alasdair, thank you anil and thank you to the fantastic people who submitted these! this was an excellent 45 minutes.

[@MikeyScamp]

This was rediculously fun to shoot!

[@teaokay]

As soon as the TAZ quote came up, I had a nervous breakdown.

[@nemnyoom]

deep-seated primal fear of geese

[@Anon26535]

This has the same energy as Wayne "Local Man Ruins Everything" June reading shitposts for twitch.

[@kartermeijer6813]

18:35 THATS ME HOLY SHIT Edit: 27:00 AAAA AGAIN

[@thelivingparadox6626]

15:29 got me crying like, immediately. ow ow ouch

[@chicky6471]

Always wanted to know why Waldo hides

[@amandapedroso4728]

5:15 nice good omens reference

[@KHAEISTIREDxx14]

"I swing both ways. Violently, with an axe."

[@taffeara6743]

OMG I love this so much!! The editing for this video was freaking fantastic!! You guys are all so amazing

[@RustyQuill]

We'll pass your love onto Mike and Rusne (our video team)

[@BNK2442]

@@RustyQuill Hey, can you talk about Alasdair Stuart to delete the episode The Screwfly Solution? I mean, if he will have this type of literature, why don't he read The Turner Diaries too?

[@merlinsgirl9311]

it's a two-seater to emphasize the loneliness of piloting it alone, Tim thought you'd appreciate that, Peter.

[@autumnshare6815]

STRAIGHT UP HAS ME CACKLING EVEN AFTER ALL THIS TIME

[@code_blue5060]

Let's be honest Mike absolutely corpsing is the best part of this

[@melshinta2966]

OH NO. TTIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMM OH MY GOSH. I CANT. I JUST CANT. T-T

[@noddler217]

And now I'm thinking that me acquiring the Cornetto Trilogy on bluray this week is prophetic after that Queen rendition.

[@lanaelise4464]

Dear Leg, I'm proud of you and that was hilarious

[@madam-mint]

15:30 pain. only pain. nothing else.

[@eponymouselias]

Where’s the body, Timothy?

[@miloj1558]

WHOEVER FXCKING PUT THE TAZ QUOTE .... thank you but also IM BALLING RIGHT NOW

[@aceofjacks7071]

27:07 I KNOW THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS??

[@Undidiridium_]

I hope these audio snippets are on tiktok now

[@chemicalstairs]

18:13 and 23:50 I am keeping these in my heart

[@junoblackwood5447]

I know I'm like 8 months late but these bring me so much joy I watch them regularly 😭

[@justanormalyoutubechannel9352]

Notice how there are no dislikes... EXACTLY

[@jimbo-jpg]

the way mike read the griffin mcelroy monologue made my heart ache so, so much

[@JiggleTheJamJar]

The taz speach got me crying

[@hermazingbartels2377]

i am so excited for all the animations that are undoubtably going to come out of this!!!

[@unapologeeky]

This honestly made my day. Thank you

[@grace-ye1jo]

i love how much effort and excitement they've put into them. they're so cool. literally all the time. thanks mr. mike and mr. alasdair for all the cool quotes. it's generic but honestly it's nice to say "you're great!!!"

[@glomp4146]

this is free serotonin I'm crying this is just what I needed today

[@user-cq8rf6iz9m]

Drinking challenge: Take a shot for every divorce mention

[@epicfuzzybear1]

36:54 teen wolf reference hell yeah

[@chemicalstairs]

29:40 why does this vine fit so well ❤️

[@VincentTFarmer]

THE GOOD OMENS QUOTE OMFGGG

[@maryz9319]

Oh oh this is ... i wasnt expecting this and i am so grateful EDIT: OMG TeaHolding 😍

[@kartermeijer6813]

I was hopping around during all of this video, it was AMAZING

[@J_Adams]

The serotonin I needed today 😌

[@libercierjosephine6520]

This is immaculate

[@themadwriter]

I can't wait to use all of these on tiktok 🤣

[@ariannay766]

I'm watching this and just remembering a quote i want peter lukas to say :0 "The idea of an apocalypse is a comfort, because it makes death seem like something we can all experience together, in a single moment, a colorful firework burst. But mostly death is something you keep to yourself. In reality, the apocalypse is most likely to be you, alone in a room with the flu." - Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson, You Feel It Just Below the Ribs I think there's a similar quote in Night Vale too? but I like them both. it just feels so right.

[@CO-wc8xh]

Pretty sure one of those came from the movie Clue and I love it.