S14 E15: Confessions of a Fun Hater

Ever been accused of being a "fun hater?" If so, you're not alone. In fact, it seems to be a common trait in those of us drawn towards old-fashioned things.
Find out the difference between fun vs. flow and why your fun-hating ways may actually be a superpower.
Learn more about the Modern Homestead Conference here: modernhomesteading.com/
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Apply to be a guest on the Old-Fashioned on Purpose podcast: www.theprairiehomestead.com/p...

[@freedom8921-s6o]

This concept, combined with having purpose would would go a long way to heal what is ailing people today.

[@ShallaBal82]

I was having a conversation with my brother-in-law a couple years ago, and he said he "just wanted to be happy". I brought up the Denis Leary bit from the '90s that "happiness comes in small doses" and that no one is guaranteed to be happy all of the time. I don't know how people got it into their heads that life is one big party and screw responsibilities and hard work. I don't think I've ever been as elated with any party as I was when I took out three small trees and stumps last year - now that's living! :)

[@dianneoverton6600]

My greatest joy is to garden, read, hike, canning, help my spouse work on his projects, walk my dog, talk to my children on the phone. I have been called boring. What boring, I am having fun. So I get it, I get you. 😊

[@jenniearnold2349]

Jill, I am so totally with you here! Nobody understands my desires to "play in the dirt" so much! :) Just today hubby and I were excited that we found our very first baby apples and peaches on our trees! I've never been into shopping or traveling like my 32 year old daughter and she can't fathom why I want to garden, crochet, dehydrate and all the other fun things we do on our small homestead. I'm constantly researching and learning new things to make tinctures with but when I tell her or my sis on the phone, I can almost feel the "eye roll" from them. Oh, well........here's to all of us who are fun haters but we know what real fun is all about for us! :)

[@rainwaterrefugehomestead2267]

That "feeling the eye roll" over the phone is SO real 😂😂

[@Leiannev]

I used to invite people to come visit me & excitedly chime “I have some fun projects we can work on together”. I’ve never had anyone take me up on my generosity to “ allow” them to share the joys of working on my farm. At first I was puzzled, then I eventually realized they didn’t get it! Yesterday I planted potatoes & I’m still on a high!

[@lisam5744]

Oh, I get it! I planted bean seeds yesterday and my pigeon peas germinated. I was doing a little happy dance. 🙂

[@lisawoody6757]

You are my tribe. Please tell me you live in Maine…I’ll be over to help tomorrow. 😊😂🥳

[@angelat4639]

yeah, it happened to me a lot. but now i know

[@louisecreamer2952]

@@lisawoody6757 Love Maine. The way life should be 🙂

[@fourdayhomestead2839]

lol. My invited outings were usually declined anyway. The "work" time at home = a full larder come harvest season. There's nothing better than having 600 sqft of colorful jars & heaping bins.

[@staceyx3677]

Thanks for this. Timing is amazing. I’m sitting here trying to think of an excuse for friend (I don’t want to travel to Europe for my 50th bday….) I want to pull weeds in my garden and plant something beautiful. A “vacation” would stress me out lol

[@sjk7995]

This is a stunning video! You have put into words my life..... I am 74yo and this "fun hater" description is me. We love you so much because you "love" working your list and accomplishing a project. I am sending this video to all my family and friends who think I am wired weirdly. We were born to Create, Made in the image of One who CREATED.

[@revonda5204]

I like that reminder of our Creator! Thank you! 😊

[@ohnoyce]

Amen!

[@thestitchygardener953]

We have a tribe! Yay! Thanks for to articulating what we’ve all been feeling. Very validating.

[@terridominick1715]

You are speaking my language. Any time my husband and I go anywhere we say to each other”This better be good because we left the farm”. We never want to leave our farm. We love working, building and standing back at the end of the day and admire our work.

[@gloriakelley7383]

Oh. My. Goodness!!!! We have a club! I would rather run to the creek , look at animal tracks in the sand , ID plants, cool off . I am a fun hater!!!

[@jenniferr2057]

I thought I was the only one. I am purpose driven. I enjoy my food, my family, my space, my productive work. I do all the things just to prove I can. People listen to us talk about what we are doing with a cross between puzzlement and horror on their faces. Its that place where time ceases to have meaning. I cannot thank you enough for naming this for me. I always just knew I was weird and people did know what to do with me....

[@millesoc]

Thankyou for explaining why I am the way I am! I find flow in photography, swimming, cooking-especially when I am creating something out of what is available. Also from gardening, beading, walking on the beach. I like and enjoy visiting with friends, but love coming home to the space I have created.

[@revonda5204]

Jill, thank you for this. I've never considered this topic, but boy, does it fit me. Unfortunately, I'm not a homesteader, but I'm rarely content to just chill. I need to be doing something else with my hands or my thoughts. If I am sitting with a tv or video, I'm doing something with my hands. I'm not a big fiction fan, either. My books are typically how-to's or historical or learning something. Love hearingb this, especially on a Monday morning. Set my day & hopefully my week off on a good foot; i.e., Productive/worthwhile! ☺️👏👍

[@jjsolly5039]

This was actually called "getting in the zone" in the 1980's! Sailing a quiet peaceful (non-motorized) boat in the ocean I sense the Lord's Presence, running my dog in Agility Trials - we are one unit dancing together! Reading His Word on a vacant beach. Nothin' better! Thank You Jesus!

[@gregmcneill3780]

OMG you have totally nailed it!!! I am a 71 year old Physicist and have live exactly as you describe. Everyone thinks I am odd LOL. Good to know I am not alone.

[@holliwaller2774]

I cannot believe I saw this! My husband called me those exact words last week. A fun hater. Building our homestead, growing our food, improving our systems is fun to me! Unfortunately it's not the same for my husband.

[@carolkothmann6074]

You are so right on with the topic. I hate to travel because there is basically nothing productive to do.

[@stepfaniecoperude6769]

I am totally this! I didn't know it was common in our world. One thing I have to have everyday is "chicken time" where we free range together. My home is my sanctuary and I prefer not to leave it. There's always "work" to be done but it provides me true joy!

[@debbie10385]

I am so grateful for this podcast. My husband recently retired and we keep getting asked what we're going to do--like traveling. I have tried to like it, but my heart is at home doing all the things I love to do. We're enjoying the "homestead" in a way we've never had time to do before. I feel like I'm walking on air now that I've listened to this today. Bless you!

[@faintlyartistic7803]

Hubby and I both work in the school system. Every long weekend or break, all the other employees are off camping, concerts or whatever. We love staying home and getting stuff done. I feel the happiest when i am accomplishing something. I don't have acreage, just a large garden, greenhouse and chickens. I refinish furniture pieces in good weather. Winters are spent spent hand quilting and doing small projects. This past weekend I planted over 200 onions and did some cooking and wildcrafting. I hate having interruptions to my home time...

[@annadavis6322]

Lol, I have long been a fun hater, too! My poor kids just couldn't understand but I am glad I'm not alone. I think the difficulty level must be very necessary for me, especially physically. I get in the flow very well doing building projects. Although beginning canning and baking bread were definitely flow inducing

[@ohnoyce]

For decades I've proclaimed that cooking is my zen. Thanks for connecting the dots.

[@alexissuggs2560]

I ABSOLUTELY can relate to this and so appreciate someone for explaining what I’ve felt my whole life.

[@musicmarlene]

Excellent and well said. My 75 year old husband is like you. I am going to show him your video. We have lived as Homesteaders. We raised 2 boys this way in Oregon, Texas, Flagstaff, Az and we retired in Idaho and now live in town. My husband is still creating passionately. We live in Coeur d’alene where the conference you mentioned will be happening. Thank you for talking about this subject.

[@suebadger92]

I am so blessed to have a large group of friends who are like this !..as I am. ❤

[@circlefarms]

Wow, this is insightful. I used to think I didn't know how to relax, now I know why! Without "purpose", I find just relaxing gets boring pretty quickly.

[@sybillesanderson4494]

Thanks for your honesty Jill! I too prefer the awesome feeling of accomplishment!

[@leahbresee433]

Thank you!! I believe this has helped a LOT of people!

[@marge3157]

I get this. I love being home on our ranch. Because their is ALWAYS something to do. And the end result is visible and satisfying. When my kids were home we had to make a real effort to do fun things like road trips to show them lifestyles beyond ours. The kids are grown and gone (27, 26 and 24) but my husband and I still road trip once a year. This year we went to New Orleans. On one hand we were reminded that we are not on an island in this country and on the other we appreciate our little corner and couldn't wait to get back.

[@andriapepper9520]

For me working with my horses. And building. Sometimes even organizing the barn. I completely understand not having fun in a traditional way. It's funny most of our family has been accused of fun Hating. Lol

[@JillMonecke]

I teared up watching this: feeling completely understood! Funny/'punny' thing: I am a Jill too and I have a saying, "Where there's a Jill, there's a way." Sounds sassy but more of a self-cheer :)

[@debrahitz7344]

❤ this!!! What do I love to do for fun? Firewood, firewood, firewood!!

[@fatheringautism]

Hmm, flow state. I always thought it was just ADHD hyper focus. Many truths spoken here, great episode!

[@jess3310]

Proud mom moment over the mouse trap flow. I love that.

[@emilymiller1792]

There are fiction books out there that take quite a bit of chewing--they are the Great Works, the classics. Great talk on flow and the pleasure of a job well done and doing things old fashioned on purpose.

[@cathymccall9846]

AMEN.. TY for bringing this topic to the table Jill. I've always had this "otherworldly" sense too.... I've wondered why or if I was just weird. I found my answer by going back to my "roots"... it all started in a garden.The biblical mandate in God's command to be productive means we were created for such. We reap enormous blessing, spiritual satisfaction including personal dignity from operating within that framework. It's a win/win. God is pleased we are blessed. In Dorothy Sayer's book 'The Mind of The Maker', it is stated that the characteristic common to God and man is apparently... the desire and ability to make things. Thanks again so, so much for this confirmation that I'm not alone.....

[@GINAAJONES]

You hit the nail on the head. My fun is different from my friends. To get away from what I do, love to do and do normal things, is not fun for me. If that makes sense.

[@AutumnPaigeHarris]

Sowing seeds, working in the garden, prepping the garden, planting and transplanting, crocheting, reading (sometimes), homeschool year planning, drawing or watercoloring (I’m a newbie at art and found ALL can do art well, but all aren’t given the tools or the chance. I found both ❤), working on paperwork or taxes or data entry stuff lol… writing, journaling.

[@ButterflyMeadowsHomestead]

Thank you for this. This is me. I heard someone once said do what you love and you will never work a day in your life. I always enjoy every task (except maybe cleaning the cat litter) I don’t look at my homemaking and homestead chores as work. I love it. I have been told I need to have fun. But they didn’t understand I already was having fun.

[@carolynstreet5325]

I love what you've said here. I love doing stuff in my garden, in my kitchen, in my wood shop.

[@cherylmiller2272]

Bingo!! Just the way I feel!!

[@householdsix1307]

Jill, we are the same! I have several projects going all the time! Currently, building a shelter, a barn addition and about to start renovating my "she shed" , planting the garden, prepping for more goats. I could keep listing!! Always looking to achieve the flow. I always feel that when I'm in the garden...

[@bevlong7829]

That was so interesting 😊. A potentially difficult concept to convey but you express it so well!

[@noblelifeamazing7431]

I space out my fun! But boy do we (hubs and me) have fun when we want to. We have lots of downtime too…fun can be exhausting. 😂

[@nancyc4271]

When asked bright and early this morning what I did for fun this weekend, I exclaimed I made a kick ass chicken tractor! I've got pictures, wanna see?! LOL I've always known I marched to the beat of a different drum, and I've always been good with it. I really felt this podcast to my core! Thank you for being part of my tribe! And helping create a place where our tribe feel at home in all of our crazy ways!!

[@karenlayton6162]

Love, Love, Love this video. I have had these feeling all my life (62 years). I always felt like the odd women out. Sometimes even my husband doesn’t understand why I get such a rush just digging in the dirt. Or playing I. The craft room. He sometimes want to do things for me and I have to tell him, “This is my happy place”. I really do agree that these feelings are grounding to me. Thank you so much Jill for opening up this subject matter. 👍🏻❤️😀

[@latishalarimore7156]

I believe my flow is cooking. I remember my great grandmothers cooking and my grandmothers and mothers. I'm also a cookbook addict but more recently homesteading books as well. I absolutely would love to move to the country and try it. I feel so confined in the city.

[@fourdayhomestead2839]

I don't think of it as being a fun hater, I see it as being content with the life we wanted, built & enjoy. 😊

[@cedarcottagefarm2885]

Excellent topic.

[@jimt6151]

Guilty as charged!!! Never heard the term "fun hater", but I've definitely heard it in other words!

[@Celinesweetpea]

I absolutely love your solo episodes 😊

[@bkwhistler05]

I love this! I love working on things and being accomplished. I don't have a homestead (yet) but I'm raising hens and quail in my little backyard with a few raised garden beds. I love your videos and love to learn. I am a tribe member!!

[@michellecjackson4956]

I totally get this. I would rather dig in the garden and bake bread than go out anywhere

[@JamieClements1982]

This is me!!! Last summer we went on vacation and took a cruise with our family. I stepped on the ship and just had this sense of dread. I just wanted to get it over and get back to my homestead. 😂 I’ve always been a homebody even as a kid. Plus I don’t think hotels and such are clean.

[@marysidle5132]

Hi! My name is Mary, and I am a fun hater. Thank you for bringing up this topic because I truly thought there was something wrong with me LOL. I love to be home and working on projects, pulling weeds, playing in the dirt. I always thought I was born 100 years too late! I now know I am ok. Vacation seems like such a waste of time and money to me. Love your shares. GOD bless

[@andreabeydler5107]

Thank you so much for explaining how I have felt my whole life. As I have been in many situations and wondered why I just couldn't have their kind of fun now it makes sense. Thanks!❤

[@alisonmaher8188]

Yes, so fun, the best fun is to fix up the homestead, then invite others over to enjoy our lovely place with us!

[@cowgirljane6976]

I'm out on a ranch homestead (near you) often in the zone doing all the stuff we country folks do, plus artwork and music, when not doing office work and holding down the fort in general. I do love to write fiction too, so really enjoy reading at night when it's all done. Yup, we live a different kind of life for today's world and it is a good place to be, enjoying many blessings though it's not all easy and the pay isn't always great. Lots of good points on your videos. ☺

[@toniriglin-cp7cs]

Oh i loved this, i do feel quite alone sometimes in my thoughts, i get such pleasures in cooking,sewing, planting, thank you so much, i really dont like shopping x

[@rebeccabodmer5498]

Didn't know this is what it is called 😂 I just considered myself a home body😊

[@HillCountryGardenGirl]

Wow, this is so interesting because this explains a lot about my own personality and why I’ve become more selective of who I’m willing to share my time and energy with. Thank you!

[@suenepa]

I haven't been accused of being a fun-hater. I HAVE been accused of being dull. I like working on a quilt, or canning- even mowing the lawn. I like solitude. Sitting out with people wagging their tongues doesn't do anything for me.

[@Chefbrehomner]

Love the solo episodes btw!

[@rainwaterrefugehomestead2267]

I get the most flow gardening. It is incredible for mental health! Cooking is another one, except that one burns me out a little sometimes. I think gardening is above cooking because gardening is seasonal.

[@cheryldotson9389]

Very inspirational! Thank you.

[@deannatolliver1656]

Yes! Yes! I DO have a tribe! The longer you talked about this, the more memories came flooding in from my past, of the sometimes awkward times when I preferred to do other things besides going somewhere to have someone else entertain me, and knew that the “others” thought I was weird or didn’t like them or….whatever. I wonder if another trait we all might share is the love of a challenge because that can often put us in that state of flow. Thank you, Jill!

[@haou132]

Thank you and blessings +++!!!

[@masquitaful]

Thank you for putting into words what I live everyday, but could never explain. My husband is always asking me, why do you work so hard? But he does it too. He just doesn't understand what "it" is.

[@annieg7348]

This is so me!

[@homeontheplainswithzf8216]

Yes! 💯♥️👌 Absolutely! Z&F

[@marychristensen4254]

That’s me!❤

[@pittysbad]

gee, I thought I was the only one. I would much rather be alone, working on something than with a crowd of party animals.

[@freedom8921-s6o]

Great episode!

[@lisam5744]

I've never been called a fun hater, but I have been called boring. Someone once told me online that my life was so small that it could fit in a thimble. LOL Probably...but I'm happy. Some folks have a difficult time understanding that I'd rather be home and comfortable, or out in the garden or sitting on the porch with my hubby sipping a cold beer and watching the chickens do chicken things. As I've simplified my life and do what I like, I feel less and less of a need to consume (BTW-great term!) what society has told me that I should consume. Nice to know I'm in good company there.

[@faintlyartistic7803]

Create the kind of life you don't need a vacation from...

[@stephencameron1709]

Very much agree! Val C

[@lauriedarlow5836]

Spot on!

[@jamesvigil707]

Best two days of vacation are, the day you leave and the day you get back.

[@hilltophomestead1328]

I love this! My husband has never been able to understand why I often base my happiness in a given day on my productivity. What did I accomplish? Can I SEE the fruits of my labor?

[@terrycarefoot4038]

Very interesting now I understand me Thanks

[@jenm6836]

The story of your son was exactly how I spent my days as a child. I mourn that kids now days don't experience that.

[@ecocentrichomestead6783]

Unfortunately, I'm on the evolutionary theory side of things. The industrial revolution, and the corporate expansion post baby boom, have weeded out much of the self reliance in the general human population. It needs to be our goal to show those traits as beneficial again. It will result in a genetic shift back to self reliant disposition for the population as a whole. Much of the "Old fashion" things are really "Self sufficiency" vs "commercial consumption". Sharping knives can be a homestead task (old fashion) or a commercial purchase (Modern) but sharpening knives is still relevant today. Repairing modern tools relies on old fashion self reliance and problem solving but is a modern activity.

[@tsianiniapruitt6148]

I'M NOT ALONE!😂

[@photom3]

We don’t all define fun the same way nor require the same frequency. Some of us were raised that if you were having fun there was probably something wrong with it. 😏

[@nopelindoputraperkasa5869]

Nice sharing Vidio... always succses friend 🇮🇩🌺😍

[@manuelabrasser32]

This is so me😂

[@samoatodd8730]

❤

[@rumpoh8039]

NEVER RELEASE MICE / RATS YOU GET MORE RATS WHO THEN AVOID TRAPS.

[@althovio]

LOL, I am a fun hater. I like to garden for fun. I also like to knit and dye fibers for fun. Seed shopping is way too much fun. Lots of dopamine in those catalogs. ahahahah.

[@bladehoner3185]

Count me in as one of the tribe of " fun" haters.😂

[@jakezgab8576]

Perfectly normal

[@althovio]

He is Hungarian. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

[@amyswenson2551]

I guess, I am old fashioned… 😊

[@hannahmcmillan5712]

We enjoy it because God designed us to work. Work came before the fall. Work is not the curse.